trying to show a lot more to their relationship

angsty relationship asks

why? bc i’ve been dying with r76 lately

(this doesn’t have to be necessarily romance-oriented)

  1. do they have a lot of arguments? if so, over what?
  2. who apologizes first? in what way? is it hard for either of them to apologize?
  3. which one has more insecurities? over what?
  4. who gets more riled up? do they show their anger? 
  5. how do they hide their pain when they’re upset? do they try to hide their pain?
  6. who tries to make up first? does it work?
  7. would they hate-fuck if they were mad at one another? if they had a falling out?
  8. do they hold grudges? is it hard for them to let go/forgive each other?
  9. is there something big that could potentially tear them apart if it was revealed? 
  10. if something already happened to tear them apart, what would make them come back together? is it even possible?
  11. what’s their favorite pass time when they’re upset?
  12. who do they confide in when shit hits the fan (besides each other)?
  13. is it hard for them to talk about their feelings openly with each other? if so, is there any way that can be resolved, even in the slightest?
  14. who grieves more when the other is away?
  15. who misses the other more, or really thinks about them more?
  16. do either of them have a special item (an article of clothing, a necklace, a book) that they use when they miss the other? if so, what is it? what do they do with it (read, wear, look at, smell)?
  17. who cries more? who gets more emotional in general?
  18. do either of them have the other’s stuff lying around their house?
  19. how about teasing? do they tease each other while in a fight (whether it be with themselves or just general teasing)?
  20. do either of them have any vices?
  21. what’s the thing they miss most about each other?
  22. what’s their go-to breakup/angst song?
  23. who’s more jealous?
  24. who is the first to forgive?
  25. what’s the one deal breaker for either of them (lack of communication, fear of commitment, etc)?
  26. who would take longer to let go? do they ever really “let go”?
  27. which is more afraid of confrontation?
  28. who’s the first to distance themselves (if either)?
  29. who’s more patient? is it hard to break that patience?
  30. who’s the first to blame themselves? 
  31. who’s more likely to do something out of spite?
  32. who would be the first to say they hate the other? would they mean it?
  33. who worries more?
  34. what scent reminds them of the other?
  35. do they have any regrets (regarding the other, or just in general)?
  36. who’s quicker to walk away if a situation gets heated?
  37. who is more prone to anger?
  38. who cries more in an argument? do either of them cry?
  39. does it take a lot for it to get to the point of yelling?
  40. who sleeps on the couch? can either of them sleep without the other?
  41. who’s more likely to protect the other?
  42. if one of them gets injured, who worries more?
  43. who would be more afraid of the other’s death/harm?
  44. who ends up yelling first? are they always yelling when arguing, or do neither of them yell at all?
  45. who would be more likely to save who? 
  46. who stays up at night brooding?
  47. who has more dreams/nightmares about the other?
  48. who comforts who after a bad dream/event?
  49. do they think about each other a lot? does it affect their performance/schoolwork?
  50. if one of them were to come back after a long time, who would come to who? would it go well? would the other person take them back?

1. People will promise to never leave you. They will. It’s okay to be sad when they do.

2. It is always okay to cry. Always. Find a bathroom, bury your face in your pillow, and let it out. Cry in the shower. Cry in the car. Cry when you need to.

3. Boys will flirt with you for a while and then ignore you. Then, they will flirt with you some more. It will be confusing. You have every right to stop putting up with it.

4. Pay attention to what people say when they’re angry. When you make up and they tell you they didn’t mean any of it, know that they did. Also know that they wish they didn’t. Forgive them.

5. Never pretend to be someone you’re not. If you don’t like tea and classic novels, don’t act like you do to impress people. If you don’t want to wear leather jackets and combat boots, don’t wear them to please someone else.

6. People will be mean to you; they will spread lies, call you names, and talk about you behind your back. Eventually you will realize that it is petty and stupid and not worth your time. You’ll be right. Move on with your life.

7. Your friends will not always be there for you. When you really need to talk, they will sometimes not want to hear it. That’s okay. Take a deep breath and remember all the times you felt the same way. Exhale.

8. You will wait and wait and wait for your first kiss and your first date and your first relationship. The anticipation will kill you. You will keep trying to find the right person in everyone you meet. Relax. There’s no rush. The best things happen unplanned.

9. Enjoy being young. Love that everything is spontaneous. As you get older, things become more and more scheduled out. Embrace the fact that you aren’t there yet.

10. Tell people how you feel. It will be terrifying in some cases and gratifying in others. It will create relationships and ruin them. But speak your mind, even if your voice shakes, because your thoughts may never otherwise be heard.

11. Sleep. If you go to bed late, sleep in. If you’re still tired when you wake up, go back to bed. If you can’t stay awake during the day, take a nap. Sleeping is a foolproof way of getting rid of your problems for a little while. Utilize it.

12. Talk to people. Talk to your sister about the guy she likes. Talk to your mom about her childhood. Talk to your dad about his favorite books. Talk to your grandparents about their families. Talk to your friends, talk to your pets, talk to the cute waitress at the restaurant. Learn things from them. Be inspired.

13. Always bring a sweater. Even if you think it won’t be cold.

14. Try new things. Eat a new food, try a new kind of juice, switch up the way you dress. You never know what you might end up loving. Life can get boring. Mix it up a bit.

15. Take care of yourself. Wash your hair with that good smelling soap you love. Eat fruits and vegetables. Drink lots of water. Go for long walks in pretty parks.

16. School is important. Try your hardest. If you don’t get something, ask for help. Do your homework. Show your teachers that you’re willing to work hard, and when it comes time to apply to colleges, you’ll be glad you did.

17. There will always be someone prettier, smarter, funnier, or more popular than you. The beauty of it is that it isn’t a competition.

—  17 things I learned by 17
lili & cole on betty & jughead

“But what I found when I was really diving in — because once we started putting Jughead and Betty together, I started diving into try and find out if that’s a narrative that even exists in the digests, and it turns out, it is. It’s a narrative that’s existed for a long time. There are a handful of digests in which Jughead would say things like ‘Oh, Betty, if I did like women I guarantee you would be the one I would marry outright. You are the best person around.’ He would say these things that are really romantic and cute with an appreciation for Betty and I think it’s become clear to me now that Roberto has taken off with that.” –cole

“This is a new universe, this is a new take on Jughead, and he is this tortured damaged kid — this Holden Caulfield — who is looking for someone who can relate to him on a personal level and that narrative itself is also beautiful. While I think that [asexual] representation is needed, this Jughead is not that Jughead. This Jughead is not Zdarsky’s Jughead and this Jughead is not the aromantic Jughead. This Jughead is a person who is looking for a kind of deeper companionship with a person like Betty..and Betty ends up being this super nurturing, caring, catering person that with Jughead’s super screwed-up past they end up diving into each other and it ends up being a beautiful thing. How are people going to respond? Truthfully, they’re probably going to be quite incendiary about it at first. Do I think that’s ill-placed? No. Do I think they should give it a shot? Yeah, I do, because I think that after filming thirteen episodes, it makes sense to me and if it makes sense to me as the person who’s dumping so much time and so much argumentation into trying to represent Jughead correctly, it will make sense to other people as well.” –cole

It’s important to remember that — though Betty and Archie when they were younger were this cute couple — Jughead, Betty and Archie were the three childhood friends. So Betty knows Jughead probably just as well as Archie does in certain ways and she is also this sort of nostalgic force of what was once morally just. I do believe Jughead is absolutely obsessed with what was once Riverdale, and Betty still represents this morality and purity that he associates to this more ‘Peter Pan’-like childhood version of Riverdale. He finds great comfort in that and becomes easily accessible and resonates with him.” –cole

So there are a couple episodes — I won’t spoil too much — where you definitely get to see Jughead without a hat on, but we’ve saved it only for real vulnerable and personal moments. Yeah, you only see Jughead without his hat on in super vulnerable moments, because we kind of sold it as like his security blanket of sorts, and so – when he’s willing to take it off – it becomes this kind of special, vulnerable, personal thing. I think the first time he loses his hat is a moment with Betty.” –cole

“I’m really excited for people to see it. I hope their reaction is good. I mean, a lot of people– everyone has their own couple that they want to work on the show, but I think Betty and Jughead’s relationship as it progresses is really quite beautiful and they’re very supportive for one another, so I hope people appreciate that. And I think they will. Kind of all things aside, Jughead and Betty make each other happy.” –lili

Jughead was this character that was very much searching for a comfort and companionship in other people, and he ended up finding that within this super nurturing, care-taking, loving figure that Betty Cooper has become. And I think it makes a lot of sense narratively, the way the show has taken place, that the two of them end up sort of teaming up and becoming this force of investigation and companionship. And, you know, it’s very much a– It’s something deeper and more romantic than what I think people are going to expect, which is nice.” –cole

I think Betty makes Jug happy… Brings out, you know, the happiness in him.” –lili    

“I think, in this show, he’s not a romantic and not asexual. I argued in the beginning, creatively, that he should be both, but in this show, he’s kind of a tortured youth that ends up finding a comfort and a resonance with another person who’s going through a lot of trauma. They end up forming this kind of beautiful, honest union, and I think that, to me, is a narrative that works with this universe of Jughead.” –cole

Betty and Jughead end up being a wonderful match.” –lili

“I think Betty sees someone who genuinely cares for her and that’s not to say that Archie doesn’t, but I think Archie is preoccupied with other things and other women in his life. Jughead on the other hand is just dealing with his own family issues, which he doesn’t share with Betty until later on in the season. But he just really cares about Betty because she’s so lovable and I think he can’t help it. But Betty sees this genuine, outsider in him and she can relate because I think Betty feels like an outsider at times too. I think that is what draws her to him a little bit because they both don’t necessarily fit in.” –lili

“I think they begin to learn a lot more about each other’s family histories and family life, especially when Betty finds out about Jughead’s homelessness and it’s kind of beautiful to see Betty accept Jughead’s past and conquer it with him.” –lili

“Betty is best friends with Archie, which means she grew up with Jughead. They know each other, and they’re friends. Jughead is more outwardly dark and brooding, and Betty wishes she could be more like that. On the outside, they couldn’t be more different, but a lot of what Betty feels on the inside is what Jughead presents to the world — and that’s something that she hasn’t been able to do, out of pressure from her parents. She can’t present weakness to the world, and that’s what attracts her to Jughead. She’s attracted to his darkness because she relates to it. She feels like an outsider at the end of the day, which is why they make such a great pair. They’re both outsiders.” –lili

I think that she can appreciate his moodiness and his darkness because she has that within her self as well and I think that Jughead is a very caring and passionate guy and Betty helps bring out that side of him.” – lili

“They team up in that way — it starts with them working together, then their bond just gets closer. Jug helps Betty search for Polly, and she helps Jughead with [upcoming] family problems. It’s a beautiful friendship and maybe turns into something more.” –lili

Jughead finds a kind of comfort in Betty, and Betty finds a comfort in Jughead that allows them to step outside of the shit in their private lives for a moment. They really end up exploring it across the episode, and well, it works. It does. Jughead really cherishes few people and when he does, he goes full throttle with it, and Betty is the same. They’re both looking for comfort… and they find it.” –cole

“I had sort of read it as, well, if Jughead can be a force of clarity in Betty’s life in that moment where she’s sort of hyperventilating and panicking – if his romance with Betty can be the thing that allows her to see clearly, that’s something I think he [would take] pride in.” –cole

There is more than just a friendship there. It’s more than just platonic. But I think sex and being sexual is the last thing on both of their minds because they both obviously have a lot of family issues they’re dealing with. And even being sexual teenagers—again, they are more mature, while Archie is still stuck in that headspace. It just shows the different levels and the different maturities of the characters. At this point, Betty and Jughead are taking their time. That’s so much more satisfying to me as an audience member because it makes when they kiss so much more special.” –lili

When you put two passionate people together like that—especially when they’re trying to find Polly—a very intimate relationship comes out of it, and that’s what you see happens. In last week’s episode, Jughead was all about helping Betty. In tonight’s episode, Betty is all about helping Jughead. It’s a give and take, not one-sided, which may have happened in a less mature relationship.” –lili

“They are pulled together because Betty keeps her darkness on the inside, and I think Jughead wears it on the outside. They are slowly drifting together because she’s attracted to his darkness and his ability to come to terms and live with his dark side, whereas she pushes it away. He doesn’t necessarily try to push his bright side away; it just doesn’t come out very often. I think Betty brings out that side in him.” –lili

“As a couple they– They’re like the investigative journalistic duo here, working at the Blue and Gold. And I think their relationship started off being the journalists, being the two detectives in the school, and then it kind of branched into something romantic for both of them.” –lili

They compare themselves to Romeo and Juliet a couple times because he’s from the wrong side of the tracks and she’s the perfect girl next door. So I think there’s a star-crossed lover kind of aspect.” –lili

“I think they’re both romantics, and being put in a situation where they’re solving a murder kind of brings you close to someone, and I think they have a deep appreciation for each other. I think it’s really, it’s real and it’s there.” –lili

“I think in the following episodes, specifically episode 10, Bughead stops truly being like some sort of perfect, joyous thing; And the two of them start to investigate: Okay, can these personalities actually be compatible? Jughead is kind of the loner of Riverdale, and is intimidated by intimacy– and that gets explored. Betty’s this kind of person who’s outwardly striving for perfection, or people expect perfection of– and that also gets explored. And, so, it gets complicated, but understandable and real.” –cole

“I think, from our show’s perspective– They’re both so opposite on the outside in their appearances, but they’re very similar on the inside. They’re both kind of these tortured souls in a way, don’t you think? So, I mean, they’re both kind of on the outside in a sense, and that’s what I think kind of brings them together a little bit.” –lili

I think that similar passion was also the sort of thing that brought them close at the end of the day. I think there’s truth in that.” –cole

They balance each other very well. Betty has such a soft exterior, and he has such a harsh one. They’re kind of opposites in that sense. But I think internally, they’re both very emotionally complex characters and they’re both really passionate. Jughead is such a passionate writer and betty is such a passionate journalist, and they’re kind of like this little crime-fighting duo taking on this mystery together and I think that helps bring them closer.” –lili

“I think she’s in love with him. She says, ‘I love jughead,’ not ‘I’m in love with jughead,’ and I think there’s definitely a difference between those two things. But I do think that at that point in time, she’s falling in love. I really love them together, I really do. Some people either love them together or hate them together, but they make each other happy, you can’t deny that.” –lili

“they have a connection, unlike all the other characters, where their darkness kind of intertwines, and that’s beautiful. When they can still love each other through the darkness, that’s amazing. How he kisses her hand was actually my idea. I was like, ‘that just shows the love. When you show someone such a vulnerable side of yourself, when they physically can kiss it to show you they love every part of you, that is love.’” –lili

I think betty is very happy with jughead. I think she loves him. She loves archie as well, but I think it’s a different kind of love at this point. I think betty is smooth sailing with jughead, and isn’t confused about her feelings.” –lili

“Bughead has been through a lot of trauma Season 1 and will experience more in Season 2. It’s not smooth sailing — we get darker and weirder in Season 2.” –cole

“They’re balancing their personalities off each other, which is so apparently contrasting, and I think they’re obviously going to have realistic bumps in the road.” –cole

“With any young relationship, they’re still figuring out who they are. That kind of affects your relationship with other people. Things change. People breakup and get back together. It’s kind of an open-ended situation because anything can happen between two teenagers who are falling in love.” –lili

I want them to have a happily ever after if it’s honest and real. If they can comfort each other in a storm of shit that seems to be hitting them at light-speed, that’s what I want.“ –cole

It makes sense to have these two people who are kind of lonely and on the outside and don’t really fit in to a particular group to be together. I do hope they pull through, as long as they keep making each other happy.“ –lili

“I think the key is that it feels honest and real. Both of those kids are going through an absolute whirlwind in terms of things that they’ve seen and done over the last season, so, i think… I can hope that they just sorta work through whatever is going to be thrown at them in a way that feels genuine and communicative. And give that kind of relationship to kids who are watching would be awesome.” –cole

“I think she’s scared for her boy. I think it makes them even more of a Romeo and Juliet kind of situation because she’s thinking that he’s gonna being joining the southside and she’s on the northside. Season 2 focuses a lot on this civil war between riverdale (the northside and the southside); and she’s not caught in the middle, but the guy that she loves is on the opposite side. So, I think she’s quite terrified for that because she cares about him a lot.” –lili

lili on b*rchie & the love triangle

“It’s more about the relationships between the characters. A lot of people go into this show thinking that this guy has to choose between these two girls, and that’s the plot of the show. But that’s very much not our show. These characters are working through real issues. The main plot point of Season 1 is Jason’s murder. It’s definitely not the love triangle. I don’t think there’s even that much of a love triangle. Betty has already accepted the fact that Archie doesn’t love her that way, and she knows you can’t force someone to think differently about you. She needs to move on.

Archie is such a mess! They’re just two people who are so much better off as friends, but she doesn’t realize it just yet. That’s OK. She’s young. She’ll realize it eventually.

“He’s a confused teenage boy. He doesn’t know what he wants, romantically or for his future. He’s just lost. She has sympathy for him, but she’s trying to protect him. At the end of the day, she doesn’t want him to get hurt or wrapped up in something dangerous. I think her opinion of him, as a person, doesn’t change, but her opinion of him, as a romantic figure in her life, changes. She grew up with him as a best friend, and when you grow up with a guy as a best friend when you’re a girl, it’s hard not to see yourselves becoming romantically involved. You’re like, “We’ve been best friends. Why don’t we just be together?” That’s what she thought. Maybe she wasn’t really in love with him. Maybe she just thought she was because it felt like the right thing to do. It wasn’t easy, but it was easier than you would think for her to get over the fact that they shouldn’t be together, romantically. She just had an idea in her head of the perfect couple that was Betty and Archie, but in reality, it wasn’t there and it wouldn’t have been as good.

“In the comic books, Archie just kind of picks between each girl every other day. No girl wants to watch a girl on television be pulled apart by a guy every which way. You want a girl who doesn’t let someone do that to her.

“No, I wouldn’t say that necessarily. I think there will always be the undertone of that famous love triangle, but for right now at this point in the season, Betty and Archie are kind of going off into their own little romantic endeavors instead of with each other.

It was important to us that Archie did not come between these girls. He does for a second, but the main goal of our show – and Roberto [Aguirre-Sacasa] talked about it beforehand – is that Archie is not going to stand between a friendship between these two girls who are destined to be best friends. They are classic frenemies, but on our show, they’re just friends. They just love and care about each other. Betty has a different love interest in the show. She comes to terms pretty fast with the fact that Archie doesn’t see her in a romantic way. She gets it and can’t be mad at him for not feeling a certain way about her. And she can’t get mad at Veronica for wanting to be with Archie ‘cause she gets how great of a guy he is. Veronica wasn’t intentionally trying to hurt Betty.”

At first I thought, yeah of course they’re gonna end up together; at the end of the day, end of the series, that’s what’s right and what’s meant to happen. Now, I’m not so sure. I think Archie and Betty are so much better off as friends, and it’s kind of like when you’re so close to a person of the opposite sex, if things were to get romantic, it would feel so wrong.

K.J. is such a Betty and Archie [fan]! He wants them together!

“No, I feel like when he was introduced to the Archie story he was told Betty and Archie are endgame, so I think that’s what he sticks to and thinks must be the right thing. But you do see maybe some flares of jealousy; it comes with the territory when your best friend is with someone else. It’s like, “Who is this person?” It’s this territorial thing for your best friend.

“I think betty is very happy with jughead. I think she loves him. She loves archie as well, but I think it’s a different kind of love at this point. I think betty is smooth sailing with jughead, and isn’t confused about her feelings.

"That’s the whole point, our show is not a direct carbon copy of the comics.

I don’t think she feels possessive over archie anymore.

I personally don’t really look back to the comics as much because betty is very very different. She’s kind of like this gullible, naive girl who lets a man walk all over her a little bit; and the fact that our betty is not that way is something I’m proud of.

“I think it’s safe to say that betty is very happy with jughead and there is no bad blood… I think she is happy for her friends, if they are happy.” 

Arophobic Microaggressions: On the Ace Community and Should-Be Allies

Just some technical things, before I start talking: The bulk of the post will be under the cut, and you can find a version in Google Docs here. Non a-specs need to keep comments in the tags or to themselves, as this is an intracommunity issue, and REGs need to keep their hands off: you are not welcome in my community nor on my posts. Please be aware that I do respond to replies, publicly, especially if they’re hateful or in disagreement. If you want a private conversation, message me. If you’d like to read more, check out the Google Doc linked above for recommended reading or my aromanticism page. Thank you to @aro-allo-positivity for his help in editing this post.

In the past couple years, we’ve talked a lot about ace issues - from oppression to validation, and from discussion to action. Activists have campaigned to be included in LGBTQIANP+ organizations and succeeded in being recognized to various degrees. As an aroace woman, I’m very happy to see issues I face being talked about, and action being taken to bring awareness to my orientation. Interacting with acespec bloggers also means I see the problems, and arophobia is a pervasive problem in acespec communities. I’ve talked about it in the past, a bit, but only at surface level. The last post I made about arophobia got 1,700ish notes, and is still getting reblogged today. After making that post, I started noticing more and more arophobia, coming from even large acespec bloggers. I decided to write this post to help people notice arophobic microagressions (the macroaggressions are pretty obvious, generally) and be better allies to the aro community. 

Keep reading

wanna one’s reaction to you being jealous

yoon jisung

jisung is completely and absolutely in love with you so it wouldn’t be hard for him to reassure you that you’re the only girl he has eyes for. he wouldn’t want you to feel like you’re not good enough, so he’d compliment you a lot that day and try to make you understand that his feelings for his friends don’t go anywhere beyond platonic friendship. if you still wouldn’t believe him he would most likely scoop you up in his arms and sit you on the couch so he can cuddle up to you and give you a pep talk if needed.

ha sungwoon

sungwoon would actually be a little flattered by your jealousy. maybe it’d get to his head a little that you were worried about him interacting a lot with other girls, so he’d tease you about it for a little while. however, as soon as you make it clear to him that you’re less than amused by the whole situation he’d try to put himself in your shoes and apologize. he’d pull you close and place light kisses all over your face all while repeating over and over how much he loves you.

hwang minhyun

honestly, it’s pretty easy to get jealous when you’re dating hwang minhyun. he’s incredibly handsome and it doesn’t help that most girls love to fawn over him whenever he sets foot in the room. when you first voice your concern and tell him that you’re jealous, he might find you’re overreacting and not think too much of it. he’d wrap his hands around your waist, kiss the top of your head to calm you down a little and say something along the lines of “you shouldn’t be worrying babe, i only love you” and then that’d be it for the moment.

ong seongwoo

seongwoo loves seeing you jealous. it inflates his already big ego like nothing else, so he’d definitely be a huge dick tease about it, maybe even to the point that you get upset with him and leave. even though he is a dickhead, seongwoo can be quite sensitive when it comes to you, so he’d immediately know that he crossed a line. he’d apologize profusely and maybe confess that he gets jealous when you talk to other guys as well because boy he really does

kim jaehwan

here’s another boy that’d just love to tease you for a little while if he found out you’re jealous, however, he’d be a little sweeter and more low-key about it. you probably wouldn’t even tell him, so you just sulk on the couch for a little while and not talk to him until he figures out what’s wrong. when he notices that you’re actually pretty down, he’d be very affectionate and try to show you that you’re the only one for him. sometimes he gets kind of cheesy and cups your face in his hands to kiss your cheeks a lot. he’d probably say something dumb but adorable like “listen you’re really damn cute when you’re jealous but you’re even cuter when you’re smiling so please be happy again”

kang daniel

to daniel, your jealousy would come as kind of a shock. he’s honestly so fixated on his love for you in a good way obviously that he doesn’t even have time to think about other girls anymore. his friends are friends, that’s it, and that’s what he tells you as well. if you’re really upset about it, he’ll hold you close, wrap a blanket around the two of you and speak reassuring words to you in a low voice and if you’re still not convinced he has other ways of proving his love to you tbh have fun

park woojin

woojin still isn’t that experienced when it comes to relationships, so he wouldn’t really know what to do if you ever told him that you get jealous whenever he hangs out with other girls. he’d, of course, apologize without really knowing what he did wrong or what he can do to change it, however, he’d try to show you a little more affection and grip your hand a little tighter than usual or kiss you a little more frequently.

park jihoon

jihoon is another young ‘n pretty boy with a lot of female fans, so it’s not that hard to get jealous for you. he’d be less sweet about it and get annoyed if it happens often, because he can’t do anything but tell you that you’re the only girl he loves in hopes that you’ll believe him. sometimes your jealousy will result in a fight between the two of you, and it’s just generally a touchy topic between the both of you.

lee daehwi

daehwi would honestly be on the verge of tears lmao, he would never want to see his girlfriend hurting because of something he did, even if it was unintentional. he’d loop his arms around you from behind, bury his face in the crook of your neck and whisper sweet ‘i love you’s’ and things like ‘oh no baby please don’t be upset because of things like these you don’t have to worry’ in hopes of making you feel better. 

bae jinyoung

tbh baejin is a fucking emotional rock when it comes to these things so if you don’t come out and straight up tell him that you’re jealous he’d never be able to tell. he’d be a little confused at first but wouldn’t really make a big thing out of it even though he’d feel just the tiniest bit flattered, he’d just grab your hand and go like ‘aw babe that’s not neccessary i love you’ and it’d be settled with that.

lai guanlin

guanlin is, just like the rest of the maknae line, pretty inexperienced when it comes to relationships. when you tell him that you’re jealous he’d laugh it off, quickly peck your lips and tell you that you’re the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid eyes on which honestly makes you melt a little. he’d be happy that you like him enough to be protective over him, so he’d wrap his entire body around you and take a nice nap with you because what better way to show someone you love them amirite

anonymous asked:

I'm dying over the "beloved" mentor thing!!! oh God. You know even if sheith never becomes canon, their strength of their relationship and their feelings towards eachother still are, and I absolutely LOVE that. But on another note, do you think that the 'mentor' thing is creators nudging away sheith or is it possible for those feelings to change for both characters in the show? we already know they treat eachother as equals. And even katara was Aangs mentor in atla?

Shiro is beloved to Keith, they said. like, what kind of soft and tender shit…I’m so blessed…and you’re right, even if they never carry it in a more romantic direction, it’s obvious they still love one another and it’s just so heartwarming. And either way, I don’t think their comment was to try and discount sheith (especially considering how many people from the staff do like their relationship in a romantic context). 

Yeah, the dynamic between two characters can definitely change a lot over time, like with Katara and Aang. And in the case of Shiro and Keith, they seem like they’re honestly on equal ground. Much like the Black lion herself, Shiro never tries to command Keith, and instead trusts him to take risks and trust his instincts. He also believes Keith is more than capable of leading Voltron. When Kuron “rejoins” the team, Keith is still team leader. They both are. Keith isn’t training as Shiro’s successor, he’s actively commanding Voltron. 

Even the fact aside that they’re both managing the same responsibilities, their dynamic is entirely unlike a mentor and student. Their interactions are far more intimate than anything else you see from the team. Keith sees Shiro for the first time in a year and he gently reaches out to touch his face, like he can’t quite believe he’s real. Shiro wants to comfort Keith and they end up hugging one another so tight the princess literally stops and stares, visibly perturbed by the fact that a galra is capable of such tenderness. 

In BOM Kolivan explains that Keith’s hologram takes the form of Shiro because he’s just so desperate to see him–because Shiro is the physical manifestation of his greatest hopes and dreams. Holo-Shiro also says that if he leaves then Keith will be all alone. There’s a very close intimacy that almost borderlines dependency implied there. And you would not see that from a mentor and student. Similarly, Josh’s comment that Keith’s “always scared he’s gonna say or do something wrong and he’s gonna lose Shiro,” definitely feels more in line with a romantic relationship. I’m pretty sure there are some boundaries that are crossed that make them far too affectionate with one another for just a team leader and their successor. They’re also close enough in age that Keith refers to Shiro as being like a brother, and just that fact feels very off. You wouldn’t go up to someone you saw as a teacher and call them your brother or sister. It carries a sense of familiarity that just wouldn’t sit right. 

Moreover, you would typically expect a mentor to look after their successor. That isn’t the case here. Instead, Keith is typically portrayed as the one taking care of Shiro. Keith runs to his side when he’s in danger. When he fears he’s dying, Keith softly reassures him, promises that he’ll be there soon and everything will be okay. Saving Shiro was literally Keith’s introduction, and Shiro’s name is the first word on his lips. From their very first scene together, you automatically associate them with one another. And you see Keith go from untamed rage to completely vulnerable in an instant. Keith protects Shiro, acts like a knight sworn to defend him.

This fact is so poignant that Kuron even asks about it. And Keith tells him, with the fondest look, that of course he’ll always be there to save him. “As many times as it takes.” 

Even just the fact that Keith alone is allowed to see Kuron when he’s recovering is curious. Again, Keith is the one placed in a caretaker role, and he says things like “Well, if you’re feeling up to it,” never once pressuring Shiro and rather trying to be encouraging while still affirming that it’s okay to not be okay. That Shiro should take his time and go at his own pace. He also says “we’ll be on the bridge,” before he leaves, a subtle way of saying, “This is where I’ll be, come find me if you need anything.” 

Keith is the person really supporting Shiro, the one always at his side when he needs someone. It’s a very unusual dynamic, and one that I think certainly defines Keith as more than someone who’s just training to take up Shiro’s mantle. Also, I personally can’t really see Keith referring to anyone else on the team as “beloved” at this point. So again, there’s this level of intimacy there that I think other character interrelationships lack. 

Signs as Girlfriends

Aries: Plays hard to get. They are fun and not serious. Feel happy when they insult you because they do so out of love. They will gush about you to other people but not to your face. 

Taurus: They have a shy nature and will giggle and get embarrassed easily. They want to hold you and make sure you’re okay. Do expect random texts of them telling you that they love you. 

Gemini: More responsible to you than they are for themselves. They are the “show not tell” kind of people and will most often show that they love you through actions instead of words. Deep inside they want to tell you a lot of things but is scared for doing so. 

Cancer: Cheerful and makes sure that you are safe. They always try to make you laugh. However, they have random mood swings and they need encouragement to come out of their shell. 

Leo: Clingy and is not afraid of being weird around you. They don’t give a shit about what others think of your relationship and will feel occasionally touchy. 

Virgo: Needy and doesn’t like PDA. They will tell you everything and even if they call you dumb, they love you to the end of the world. Super huggable and loves hugs.

Libra: Very reserved. Very low-key about the relationship but will be there for you to the moon and back. They will hold you when you cry and take you on random trips. 

Scorpio: Plays hard to get until they realize that the game is bullshit once you’re in a relationship. They will not hesitate to punch someone in the face if you insult their partner. They’re a ride or die kind of partner so you’re super lucky to have them with you through thick and thins.

Sagittarius: Expect a balance between space and communication. They are low-key about relationships. Will share music playlist with you and you will have chill dates (eating ice-cream by the streets, napping)

Capricorn: Knows what they want but scared to take action. Secretly clingy but doesn’t like others to be clingy. They will throw you some playful punches.

Aquarius: Expects to be treated like a queen and wants your constant affection. They will mother you and loves taking you to places.

Pisces: Wants the best and doesn’t expect any less. They ain’t clingy but they want lots of love. You’re their best friend and lover.

How I Overcame Reader’s Block (And So Can You!)

As a kid, I adored reading.  Okay, more specifically, I enjoyed reading about dragons, but that’s not the issue here.  

It frequently coincided with my equally as intense love of climbing trees, and some of my fondest memories involve being perched in a small tree and reading some hopelessly goofy, dragon-related literature while my mom and toddler siblings used the playground equipment.  If no climbable trees were available, I’d settle for reading under one and drinking a thermos of chocolate milk while they ran around in the park. 

As I got older, my tastes got a little more eclectic as I encountered Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Anne Shirley, the residents of Narnia and Middle Earth, respectively, and much to my mother’s horror, Stephen King, but my passion remained more or less the same.    

Bottom line is, I loved reading.  It was my paramount joy, my primary source of entertainment, and I didn’t think that would ever change.

So imagine my shock when, around my sophomore year of college at the age of seventeen, it occurred to me that I hadn’t really read for pleasure since I discovered the Hunger Games a year or two prior.  Moreover, and equally as horrifically, when I tried to read I found I couldn’t focus;  regardless of the quality of the story and how much I wanted to read it, the investment was gone.

Whether this was due to my first stint with organized education (prior to college, I was homeschooled) or the fact that I’d grown accustomed to the bite-sized chunks of candy-flavored, insubstantial information served up by the internet, the sad and simple fact was that I had fallen out of love with reading, and it looked like it was going to stay that way forever.   

Well, flash forward two-point-five years to Present-Day Brooksie, and since school got out in early May, I’ve read Chuck Palahniuk’s Make Something Up: Stories You Can’t Unread, Ruth Ware’s In a Dark, Dark Wood, Emma Straub’s The Vacationers, Neil Gaiman’s The Graveyard Book, and Celeste Ng’s Everything I Never Told You.  Despite the disappointing lack of dragons, I loved all of them.    

I drink books like nectar again, if you’ll pardon the floral language, and everything from the quality of my writing to the quality of my life has improved as a result of it.  

So how did I fall back in love with reading?  Well, I’ve spent a lot of time pontificating on this, and as far as I can tell, it can be narrowed down to three factors:

1.  Reading every day.

It started with lunch.  Every day, when I’d sit down at my university cafe, I used to get out my laptop and watch YouTube or whatnot while I ate my sandwich – a cool idea in theory, but really sort of gross whenever I rubbed my greasy fingers on the mouse and keyboard. 

When I made a conscious decision to read more, I began taking out my book and reading during the lunch period instead.  It didn’t come naturally at first – I was easily distracted and kept zoning out – but I ultimately found it very pleasant, especially when I listened to some classical music in the background as well (nice for atmosphere, and for drowning out noise and distractions.)  

I kept doing it.  

When that summer rolled around, I rediscovered an amazing little outdoor cafe by the harbor.  It had no wifi, which for my purposes, was absolutely perfect.

I went there to read Good Omens and eat home baked lemon squares, pie, and banana bread, listening to international tourists speak in other languages, and watch the boats go by.  It was a beautiful environment, and that (coupled with the fact that Good Omens is just really fucking awesome) made it easier than ever for me to want to stay longer and become more engrossed in what I was reading.

Afterwards, I’d take out my notebook and work on my own stories and journal.  Overall, I’d say that summer was one of the most intellectually productive I’ve had.  

Once school started again, it got a little harder to read every day, but by then my love of reading had pretty much caught:  it had become an intellectual drug for me again, a source of comfort, pleasure, and inspiration.  Also, it was another viable excuse to procrastinate on my academic responsibilities, which was always welcome.  So I kept reading.  It was still a relatively slow process, as I had to work around my already busy schedule, but the more I read the more adept I became at drinking in the information in hungry, satisfying gulps (a bit more suggestive than I’d initially intended that metaphor to be, but I’m going to go with it.)

But this isn’t to say that there were no bumps in the road back to bibliophilia.  There was another factor that I had to grasp before I reached the point where I could unabashedly adore reading once again.

Which is: 

2.  Reading what excites me.

No, I’m not speaking sexually, you pervert.  I’m talking about books I actually want to read.  

When I first started trying to get back into literature, I started trying to read the classics exclusively, like Around the World in Eighty Days and Little Women.  Let me be clear, these books are amazing (excluding the jarring amounts of racism and endorsements of British colonialism in the former) but after semesters of reading similar works for my literature seminars, they just felt a little like…academia.  

In fact, the only reason I was insistent on reading classics exclusively, I now realize, was because I was a pretentious, pseudo intellectual little shit back in those days with a horrible case of impostor syndrome.  What I needed to re-learn was what dragon-loving, Ten-Year-Old Brooksie long since already knew: the best way to enjoy reading is to read what you actually enjoy.

It was a lesson I slowly but surely remastered, and it took me a while to realize that modern literature is teaming with smart, enriching reads, like Life of Pi, American Gods, Where’d You Go Bernadette, The Twelve Tribes of Hattie, The Help, Everything I Never Told You, and countless others.  

Moreover, these were books I didn’t have to force myself to read;  they were books I found myself reading at four AM because I didn’t want to stop.  

I’ve also discovered classics that I can eat up in a matter of days, like A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Which absolutely everyone should read, by the way:  Francie Nolan is a feminist icon, and way, way ahead of her time, not to mention it’s fucking hilarious and will make you cry like a little bitch), Jane Eyre, and basically anything written by Jane Austen.  I love these books for their sharp wit, applicable and timeless life observations, and striking lack of the pretentiousness that I’d come to associate with a lot of classic literature.

This summer, I my reading list includes Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse 5, Douglas Adams’ The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, Chuck Palahniuk’s Fight Club, Louis Sachar’s Holes, Anthony Doerr’s All the Light We Cannot See, and Neil Gaiman’s Anansi Boys.  I’m looking forward to reading each and every one of them. 

Ultimately, the point I’m trying to make here is that there’s no joy to be found in pretentiousness:  don’t read to prove yourself as an intellectual.  Read to enrich your soul, read what you legitimately enjoy, and read what inspires you.  

Which brings me to my next and final point…   

3.  Reading what inspires me.

This one might be true specifically for my fellow authors, but since I know a large portion of my followers are fellow authors, I think it’s applicable here.  

Ever since I was an infinitesimally small child, I’ve wanted to write stories.  When I was fourteen I wrote a hopelessly angsty YA novel about a half-dragon girl named Freedom and her misadventures with an ambiguously lesbian vampire and werewolf duo, a seductive and ambiguously bisexual elf (it was a time of self discovery for me), and a talking lion.  When I was eleven, I wrote a middle grade novel about a little boy who befriends a dragon.  When I was four, I wrote *ahem!* drew wordless stories about a winged wolf-creature named Starlight and his (in retrospect, overtly gory) battles with monsters.

It was bizarre, cringey, and I’m not gonna lie, pretty fucking awesome.  

Around the time I started college at around sixteen, I’d just decided I wanted to start writing again.  I had lots of ideas, and I remember in detail getting yelled at by my manager for scribbling in my notebook behind the counter instead of dutifully smiling at customers the way I was supposed to.  

But my writing was…well, to put it bluntly, it was really, really bad.  It only began to improve when I resolved to write every day.  It noticeably and drastically began to improve when I began to read works that I found creatively inspiring. 

While I was revising my manuscript, I read a lot of Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, both masters of the kind of urban fantasy I was attempting to write,  and spent a lot of time figuring out what I loved most about their writing and how to best apply it.  This was also around the time I began reading Douglas Adams, which was, let me tell you, a magical experience.  It involved a lot of delighted gasping on my end and thinking you’re allowed to do that?

It really showed me what the barriers were for creative writing, or in this case, total lack thereof.

I think I owe these writers a lot for helping me to create several novel-length manuscripts I’m incredibly proud of, and one that I’m currently preparing to get published.


So in closing, for anyone suffering from reader’s block, feel free to try my approach:  read every day, read what you love and not to stoke your ego, and for my writer peeps, read what inspires you.

Either way, my books and I are enjoying a passionate long-term relationship, and every day I find myself loving them more.

anonymous asked:

can you say something positive about this show bc i truly feel horrible and all i see are negative comments

sure thing fam! I’ve got a million and one great things to say about shadowhunters! 

the cast

  • let’s start with the cast…..oh man the cast, have you ever seen or heard of a lovelier group of people? a sweet and perfect redheaded angel? a cow-loving  farmer sunflower man? a sexy british rapscallion? a latina goddess who is the sweetest angel in the world? a hilarious but also very profound and extremely talent soft brooklyn hipster? the most talented dancer/human to ever grace the world who is also a complete wondeful dork? the sweetest and funniest and most wonderful person who ever did wear an ascot? they’re perfect 
  • nothing makes me happier than their friendships with each other and just their general sweetness :))))
  • i mean every dynamic of theirs is adorable and hilarious? kat and alberto’s friendship, domberto’s antics, the parabatri feels, dom’s lil crush on matthew, the esther/shelby/shumdario friendship! em being an older sister to kat!! how lovely are they all!!
  • and of course, of course, how earnest they are towards the show because they know how important it is to all of us, and it’s heartwarming to see all the effort that they put into the show, as well as the amount of respect and compassion they have while interacting with fans is the most wonderful thing 
  • and of course, the fact that the people behind the show always listen to and respond to fan feedback, positive or negative! they really care about us, and it’s lovely to see :) 

the show 

  • personally, i think the writing of the show has gotten amazing! season 1 was fantastic, but all of the sort of cringey dialogue and ‘wow, nobody would actually say those words’ is gone and everything is much more textured and real, and it’s really really really living up to the potential of its premise! 
  • it’s got a gritty NYC setting and its about badass angelic soldiers fighting a demon apocalypse, all while battling these insidious problems inside their own society as well, with no real moral high ground to be achieved, but really just a scramble for survival and trying to do the right thing,  and the tone of the new season is JUST PERFECT for that 
  •  i think the show has such amazing and dimensionalized relationships like i haven’t seen in a lot of much more highbrow fiction - the romantic stuff too, but i love how important and well-written platonic and family relationships are in the show! 
  • you look at a family like the lightwoods, and they’re so real - not just the love that they have for each other, but also the issues that they face, and the struggles between parents and children and siblings. amazing. well-written AS FUCK 
  • the bonds between alec and izzy and jace!! are so well-written, so well-acted!! the relationships between luke and clary/simon/maia!! astonishingly good
  • there’s so much texture and richness to all of them it’s crazy 
  • but not JUST those super close familial relationships - every single interaction has me floored with how great it is, including ‘rare’ ones like jace and magnus, or clary and alec, or clary and magnus, or magnus and izzy
  • every character has such great acting chemistry with one another, and so every relationship just comes across as rich and real in a way that a lot of lesser shows can’t accomplish 
  • let’s talk about acting! how amazingly has every cast member improved over the course of the show? even if they didn’t start off the first season as amazing, can you believe how great everyone is? how beautifully kat captured the grief of losing jocelyn in 2x05? how amazingly dom is portraying jace’s inner struggles and suffering about valentine and his identity? how much dimension and depth harry can give us in just one glance? how matt perfectly portrays the inner conflicts of a man who was never allowed to show his true feelings on his face? how beautifully alberto shows the struggle of not belonging anywhere that you used to call home? with what grace emeraude brings us izzy’s trials and suffering? how perfectly isaiah depicted not only the grief over losing everything - his world, his parabatai, the woman he loves, but also the struggles of having to get up from the pain and be there for his children? amazing. hats off to all and emmys all around 
  • every character also has so much - so much - dimension?
  • like, not a single one of the characters is the type of YA-fantasy caricature than you see so much in this genre - each of them is fully fleshed out with flaws and strengths, and each character interacts and copes with the horrible events of their lives in completely different ways, and it’s just lovely to see that kind of commitment to character even on a fantasy/action-driven show, and that not all of it has to be directly addressed and shoved in your face, but can be communicated through subtleties of acting and writing 
  • and each of them has their own critical/crucial role to play in the story? none of them are incidental or disposable and i love it! 
  • the special effects in season two are SO! damn!! good!! holy hell did you see the warlock fight this episode? beautiful! astonishing! 
  • i love the mythology of the show! it’s so crazy interesting to explore this world, because it’s not the type of world you see in a typical YA-low-fantasy type of setting - the shadowhunters’ society is such a new and refreshing mythology, with all of their customs and their ceremonies and their laws and myths and angels and runes - i love seeing them unveil more and more of it, because it’s honestly so original and interesting 
  • like did you see the rune ceremony in this ep? it was almost haunting b/c i just love thinking about this ancient order of angelic warriors and of course all of the complications of the societal hierarchies in relation to the other types of magical races
  • and don’t get me started on the other types of mythologies, especially warlocks! i love the idea of all these esoteric spells and potions and crap that shadowhunters don’t even know about and can’t even imagine the power of - it’s so interesting and i love how they’re fleshing it all out bit by bit 
  • and i love the merging of the regular urban NYC setting with the shadow word, in locales like the jade wolf, the hotel dumort, and even the insitute - how interesting and seamless it seems sometimes? it just gives the world so much texture
  • and of course, the romance is great! like i said, every actor has fantastic chemistry with each other - even if they’re not endgames like simon/maia or climon, they’re so well-acted and well portrayed 
  • malec is fantastic - i’ve almost never seen a relationship on a show portrayed with such gravitas and realness! i love how they didn’t let either character get subsumed by the relationship, but they’re also not ignoring the existence of it to give the character their own storylines independent of it 
  • and of course it’s so darn cute :) and harry and matthew put so much time and effort into it and im so thankful for them 
Tired Of Being Alone

Masterlist

You didn’t notice anything at first. Initially, you had just thought that he was stressed or tired due to all of his hard work and long days at the studio. You didn’t want to think too much into it. It took you a while, but finally saw how different he had become. He wasn’t the same person you fell for a few short months ago. He was colder, more distant than ever. You’d hoped that it was just a phase he was going through and that he would be back to normal in no time. However as the weeks came and went and those weeks turned into months, you realized that you were wrong, that Harry had become a completely different person.

It was hard to pinpoint the exact moment where everything had changed. It wasn’t that one day he woke up and a switch was flipped, making him turn into someone who was closed off and acted bitter towards you when he was usually so kindhearted and loving. No, it was nothing like that. Rather, it was the build up- the subtle changes that were exactly that, differences that were too small to notice. And when you finally realized he wasn’t the same, all you could do was make excuses for him, for the sake of your relationship.

He slowly stopped writing sweet notes to you before he left for the studio in the early hours of the morning. Which you concluded to be him being excited to get back to work, rushing out of your house as quickly as possible to get back to writing. Then, the usual texts and calls throughout the day became less frequent until they stopped altogether. This you put down as him being busy. You two began to bicker and fight a lot more than you used to, which you put down as you going through the “bumpy stage” of the relationship. Despite this, after a while, you had a hard time coming with reasons as to why your relationship with Harry was going down the drain, and it was even more difficult to try to salvage it.

Keep reading

the thing that gets me about handwringing over the mcelroys being popular and maybe possibly doing Bad Problematic Things is that i think a large part of the reason they’ve gained the fandom they have is that they’ve actively worked to be better people and apologize for when they do fuck up and hurt people unintentionally. you read interviews with them, listen to them talk about this stuff on their shows, they actually acknowledge where they’ve gone wrong and try to do better.

the adventure zone is a good example of this - there was some backlash to the designs for the characters in the comic book all being white and pretty shortly afterwards justin made a post on facebook saying “yep! we goofed, we’re gonna go back to the drawing board and try and make them more diverse”. the most recent adventure zone episode (as of 03/04/2017) has the boys talking about and discussing some of the more unfortunate steps of characterization they’ve made. griffin talks a lot about unintentionally playing into the bury your gays trope and how he’s tried to do better with queer relationships in the show later on. mbmbam also has some stuff of this nature but i haven’t listened to that show a lot myself so i won’t go into it

they’re the first content creators i know of who seem to actually understand the responsibility that sort of comes with being Popular Online (and arguably being content creators at all) - they know they have a lot of influence, and that that influence can very directly affect people, and they genuinely want the stuff they create to be as inclusive and welcoming as possible, so even if something happened to pop off around them i have a fairly big confidence that they would do everything in their power to make reparations

i’m not saying they’re perfect, i mean i literally just talked about times they’ve fucked up, but sometimes things and people get big for a reason that’s not as horrible as some would prophesize

☆how to care for your carer☆

with a lot of suggestions out there of how to care for the kiddo, still, caring can be mutual, although maybe not in the same ways. a lot of carers are also mentally ill, sensitive, traumatized, and anxious; just like the kiddos.

(aside for the carers: you need to learn to take care of yourselves, before you can take care of your tinie properly) 

  • communicate 
    • you say what you need, encourage the carer to communicate what they want or need. tell each other if you have a bad day. try to be honest and theyll be honest back 
  • send them reminders 
    • like little messages that you love and appreciate them too. carers also need to remember that they are completely adored 
  • reasonable sleep time
    • it can be hard to push for when “youre the kiddo” but still, its possible to make the carer promise to go to bed. use puppy eyes, or nag if needed 
  • self care 
    • washing up is also a tough one, but if you try the way of “unless you do it too, i wont do it” it might work. if you can see your carer face to face, maybe ask to wash their hair, or bring them lotion - they will find it adorable and itll make them feel cared about 
  • spoil them
    • if not with material things, then with crafts like a drawing or a coloring page, or with affection. (if you can get them something like bath bombs, or lotion, it might help with the self care point) 
  • cooking
    • a good way to make sure an evil witch didnt curse the apples is to help them make a meal. maybe, if youre big enough, make something for them - if you are ldr, encourage them to cook something healthy and yummy
  • reign back the attitude
    • sometimes it gets hard for the carers to deal with fussiness, so try to be a bit more complacent with the reasonable little things. this shows your carer that you trust their judgement
  • make caring for you caring about them too
    • it can be subtle - like holding their hand during a monster check, or protecting them from a storm in a pillow fort. make sure they know you care about them too
  • dont be selfish
    • consider the carer, and their needs, and their feelings. they are human too. all the tips on tumblr usually go to a lot of extremes that are not okay in real world & relationships - never force your carer into anything theyre not comfortable with. dont get upset when they dont comply your every will. treat them like you want to be treated
  • take time to know each other 
    • if you are in a relationship outside of regression, get to know each other and do different things. give each other time to rest and grow
  • love them and be nice

Listen. 

Friendship does not equal straightness. 

Friendship does not equal straightness. 

Friendship does not equal straightness. 

As someone who is asexual, and even before I figured out I was asexual, it’s exhausting and tiring being labeled as bad or scum because you see two or more people in a close friendship or platonic relationship. 

Friendship and platonic love for some many years was, (and to an extent still is) seen as, for many straight people, a childish thing that you eventually grow out of because the “real” relationship and commitment comes from a romantic or sexual relationship, or for gay people, an aggressive silencing of healthy gay relationships by media underneath the “no they’re just friends” category. 

This is exhausting. 

It’s annoying. 

It’s stupid. 

But because I want to explore the platonic relationship between two people, especially within fandom, it doesn’t equal “omg gal pals!” It doesn’t equal “omg they’re straight!” It doesn’t equal “omg they could never ever be together because ugh that’s just gross.” 

It equals “as someone who highly values the closeness of friendships and platonic relationships, I want to see that reflected in stuff that I enjoy.” And now that I’m on my journey of coming to terms with being asexual and sex repulsed, it’s even more important than ever. 

If you don’t like someone seeing people as friends or even ace, that’s your thing. But accusing someone as homophobic or anything else  because they want to see themselves or how they see the world represented is never okay. 

The media may show friendship, but it’s not my kind of friendship. 

anonymous asked:

Being Wonder Woman's daughter and meeting Damian for the first time?

Anon request!
I kind of went past the meeting… whoops
Still I hope you like it!
___________________________________________


•The meeting between you and Damian turned into a lifelong competition of skills.

•They should’ve known by the way you two looked at each other, it wasn’t the smartest idea to let you two meet in public.

•You had great training thanks to your Mother and Damian was you know, Batman’s son.

•He had a strong dislike towards you due to your skills. It was a match to his which made him angry.

•He showed his dislike for you on the first day, saying he couldn’t spare with someone that weak.

•Both of you constantly fought with each other determined to see who was better.

•Slightly glaring at each other when you passed the halls.

•"Wonder Woman’s daughter.“ Damian would say bitterly.

•"Batman’s son.” You would reply with the same animosity.

•You told him how pointless men are.

•He told you how pointless you were.

•Your parents both knew some love was going to happen eventually.

•"Do you like spending time with Damian?“ You Mom questionably asked.

•You eagerly nodded.

•Her eyes light up and she smiled.
•"And why do you think that is?”

•"Because I feel myself getting closer to beating him once and for all.“

•She didn’t get the answer she wanted.

•Batman didn’t talk about Damian’s feelings with him, but subtly told Dick about it.

•Who asked countless questions about you and feelings etc. etc. etc.

•The whole Batfamily could tell he likes spending time with you.

•He unconsciously talks about you a lot at the manor.

•"I almost beat Y/N Alfred.” Damian would grumble.
•"Did you enjoy the match?“ Alfred would smile slightly.
•"I guess, she’s the only suitable partner to spare with.”

•It wasn’t until you both got older that you and Damian became friends.

•A very difficult and life threatening mission forcibly got you two closer.

•Fighting against each other paid off and you two became a flawless duo.

•He would talk to you more than his brothers and randomly show up to your place after patrol.

•Everyone sees something brewing up (love) BUT you two didn’t notice at all.

•"When are you going to date Y/N?“
•"Never?”

•It took a lot of people

•A lot of plans

•Tons of talks and persuasion

•For you two to realize you both had feelings for each other.

•"According to Dick I guess I have feelings for you?“
•You nodded, “Canary is trying to tell me the same thing.”

•Unlike most normal people you two fully talked a relationship out.

•2 hours later you both were in a relationship.

•"That’s not how relationships usually go.“ Dick sighed.

•Damian shrugged

•"Hopefully I won’t have more than this one.”

Goodbye Nostalgia
Coda
Goodbye Nostalgia

“Goodbye Nostalgia” by Coda

Kakyoin’s character song. This is probably my favorite song from the album, the lyrics are so well written and actually made me care a lot more about Kakyoin. It shows his growth throughout the series, his relationships with the crusaders and his best character traits. It also breaks your heart haha..ha… Enough of me talking, here’s the translation:


Yesterday
It troubled me that my reality was…
…different from everyone else

Loneliness
Instead of trying to understand others
I gave up and shut myself in… until that day

The emerald’s faint glow
I ponder the reason I was allowed to keep on living

If you can see that
It means I’m no longer alone
I come out from the veil of despair, and learn the meaning of hope

Heavenly
Those loud, noisy days
They felt like spending time with an old friend

The emerald’s shining determination
No matter what lies ahead

I risk my life fighting,
And I don’t regret any of it
I swear I won’t go back to my old pathetic self

I’ll protect you, till the end
Because an important person is awaiting our return


I listen to your lame jokes
and laugh at how stupid they are
As I look at myself like this, I think this is how I’m really supposed to be…


remember how glee joked about two female characters sleeping together and never intended it to go any further but lgbt fans latched onto them and the actresses were respectful and even encouraging of it and one even really pushed for it to be taken seriously and Glee realized this and made one of the characters a lesbian and the other bisexual and put them in a relationship and married them by series end???? 

like yes glee had terrible jokes and the writers were jerks to fans on twitter a lot but god dammit at LEAST the show actually went there and represented as many people as they could and didn’t just try and hide behind one gay couple that’s not given any depth. like damn. these shows are out here making me respect GLEE of all shows more and more…

Taurus Compatibility

Most to least compatible for Taurus

Libra

Taurus

Cancer

Capricorn

Pisces

Virgo

Leo

Scorpio

Aquarius

Sagittarius

Aries

Gemini

Taurus and Aries:

Probably one of the most problematic pairings in the Zodiac, Aries and Taurus don’t have many differences but the ones they do have can be quite vital in the relationship. Aries in an incredibly independent sign, and likes to enjoy fun, light hearted relationships with the person they love whereas Taurus has a tendency to emotionally invest in a relationship with someone they really love.  Aries being a fiery, passionate sign can be very carefree with their relationships, often doing before thinking and this can really upset Taurus who tends to get quite jealous or possessive when they feel their relationship is threatened but this is only because they put so much thought and care into the relationship and they’ll be damned if something is going to mess it up. Taurus’ temper can match that of an Aries, sometimes even outdo it but as Aries’ let go of arguments as quickly as they arise, Taurus is one to hold onto that for a long time and can withdraw from their partner if trust and stability is broken. Aries love to win, and when they do they tend to rub their partners nose in it but when they lose, they pretend it never happened, this can anger Taurus since it’s not fair to them.

However with the right level of understanding, this pairing can create a comfortable yet exciting atmosphere. Taurus is the most passionate of the earth signs which appeals to Aries nature. Taurus is a very sensual sign, appreciating things like good food and massages regardless of how simple or it might be. They know just how to pamper Aries, which they enjoy as much an Aries does. They’re very good at handling Aries’ temper since they’re much slower to anger, it builds up over time, which is good for Aries because it means someone is keeping a firm grip and isn’t going to blow up back in their face right away. Aries can bring Taurus out of their comfort zone – for better or for worse- and should pay attention to Taurus’ limits if they want to avoid upsetting their partner greatly – Taurus’ need stability and nothing would break their heart more than their own partner to break it for them. This pairing needs a lot of work and a lot of communication, they need to learn to stay calm and patient but potentially this pairing could be very rewarding.

Taurus and Taurus:

As compatible as same sign pairings are, they all have their flaws, materialism and insensitivity are two big ones in this relationship. Taureans are very materialistic signs, the house and the car are a BIG part of commitment for them because it represents a comfortable, functional home, which is important to Taurus. Materialism can be good sometimes in that you end up with a nice home and a lot to show for it but the problem with it when in relationships is that, the flame can die out and at the end of the day, when asked “Why do you stay in the marriage if you’re not happy?” Taurus’ answer could be “Well there’s the house… and the car.” As for insensitivity, Taurus’ can be insensitive to one another which means emotional issues in the relationship could cause more disruption than they would in other pairings. What I’m trying to get across here is that Taurus’ determined, materialistic nature could lead to them seeing the relationship as more of a goal, something to be completed and by the time they realise that that’s not what relationships are about, their feelings for each other could’ve changed completely.

However this pairing is incredibly compatible despite the setbacks mentioned above! This is possibly the most secure pairing in the Zodiac. Both partners are very loyal and emotionally invested in the relationship. They have a mutual understanding on the importance of the relationship to each other meaning they’re more likely to make it work. Both signs have incredible patience which means fights are quite rare, they won’t fight about trivial things making the relationship a very peaceful one. Both partners are sensual and romantic, constantly pampering each other and making small romantic gestures. The reason this relationship is one of the safest is because both partners will tend to be quite dependent on each other and the chances of one of them getting cold feet and backing out is slim because they fall in love very carefully, making sure they’re certain of their love/attraction for this person. This pairing is one of the easiest if the two can manage to keep the creativity flowing and the flame glowing, this can be a lifelong love.

Taurus and Gemini:

Taurus and Gemini are generally not a very compatible pairing, mainly because Earth and Air signs don’t mix very well, but there are also characteristics exclusive to these signs as to why they’re not compatible. Taurus is quite a jealous lover, preferring to have their partner to themselves and getting quite upset if they feel their partner is straying whereas Gemini hates to be tied down by someone, they’re known as the sign who have trouble with staying faithful and this is a huge no-no for Taurus. Taurus’ safe and secure nature isn’t exciting or challenging enough for Gemini who is always full of new ideas and goals. Gemini always needs new things to keep them busy and Taurus might now be able to keep up, preferring the comfort of home and security. Gemini, being an impulsive liar can end up hurting and manipulating Taurus without noticing it, causing Taurus to build their wall and dig up their hatchet.

However, like with every pairing, this one has a lot of potential. Taurus has a love of the arts which can spark a real intellectual stimulation in Gemini which is what they really need, it might even bring out their creative side and encourage them to produce new ideas. You need quite a lot of patience to be able to put up with a Gemini, not particularly in a bad way, it’s just they’re constantly jumping from one thing to another. Luckily, Taurus has more than enough patience to tolerate this as long as Gemini is willing to meet some of their needs too. Both signs are insensitive to an extent so there’s mutual understanding when it comes to comforting and emotions etc. which can benefit especially Gemini. Taurus’ seem to lack imagination and creativity but when in partnership with Gemini, Taurus can be exposed to new ideas and may find interests they never knew they had. Both signs are quite humorous so a good friendship can make a good foundation. If Gemini can be careful with Taurus’ emotions and if Taurus allows Gemini to have their space, this pairing can work.

Taurus and Cancer:

This pairing is generally quite compatible but it’s not without its faults. Both signs are very possessive in their relationships. They don’t really mean to be, it’s just a defence mechanism more than anything, since both of these signs tend to root their emotional security in their relationships. Taurus’ possessive nature stems from their need for emotional stability and Cancers’ stems from deep seated insecurity. Because of this, there’s the possibility that the relationship could turn toxic, so they need to be cautious of that and make sure they don’t get too carried away and swept up in the relationship. Taurus’ can come off as insensitive which to sensitive Cancer can seem upsetting and hurtful, as if Taurus doesn’t care. Cancers are naturally very manipulative signs, they manipulate to keep themselves safe, sometimes without noticing. Taurus, who values loyalty and trust above all can feel cheated and betrayed if Cancer’s manipulative qualities shine through. This can cause Taurus to either lash out or shut down, either way holding resentment for Cancer, in turn hurting them.

However this pairing has been known to be quite successful due to the loyalty and nurture involved in the relationship. Both signs require and provide undying loyalty to each other which promises a strong, long lasting relationship. Both signs like to take care of each other in different ways, Taurus makes Cancer feel pampered and treated, while Cancer turns a house into a home which Taurus greatly appreciates. This pairing is the classic “settled couple” stereotype in that their relationship has solid foundations and can last a lifetime. Both signs are very involved and tuned in with one another since relationships are a big part of their lives. If Taurus can try to provide more empathy and sympathy, Cancer might be less inclined to let their manipulative side get the better of them.

Taurus and Leo:

Fire and Earth signs tend to be a tricky match and Taurus and Leo are no exception. Leo’s have a naturally flirty energy about them which Taurus can sometimes misunderstand as “flirting with other people”. This can annoy Leo since they don’t like other people to have a grip on them. Although Taurus’ enjoy equal partnership, they desire to be the breadwinner and “master of finance”, Leos however want absolute dominance because they prefer to be the centre of the relationship. This can lead to disagreements and although Taureans are patient signs, they’re also quite headstrong and when Leo challenges that with their own stubbornness, calmness will go out the window. Leo’s pride could end up getting wounded by Taurus’ possessiveness, as they need constant adoration of some form and if Taurus isn’t providing it, they’ll look for it somewhere else. In bad situations, this relationship could just deteriorate to a title.

As with any pairing, this one does have its upsides. Both signs are incredibly loyal to each other and nothing could prevent them from being faithful. Leos have a bright and exciting outlook on life, when Taurus is introduced to this perception, their love can become less heavy and dense. This way, the relationship is still loyal and trustworthy but not as heavy and daunting as earth sign’s love generally is. Taurus being an incredibly sensual sign, is excited by Leo’s passion for romance and sex. Leos are a sucker for those who can shamelessly proclaim their love for them and Taurus has absolutely no trouble doing so. Taurus loves to pamper and treat their lovers and Leo loves to receive that treatment. Another thing that ensures a long lasting between these two is that neither of them like change, if they have made a commitment with each other, it will take a lot for them to break it and create any inharmonious change.

Taurus and Virgo:

As compatible as earth signs are together they have their faults. Both signs are incredibly determined to make the relationship stable and long-lasting that without really noticing, the spark could go out and the relationship could go stale. Virgo, being the main perfectionist and neat freak of the zodiac, might unintentionally start nit-picking at Taurus which could irritate Taurus and maybe even hurt them a bit. If Taurus’ hidden rage and resentment becomes apparent to cool, passive aggressive Virgo, it can be incredibly repelling. As passive as Virgos are, they have a very sharp tongue and know just which words can make someone tick. If they use this against Taurus and cross any form of line, Taurus’ will hold onto it and never let it go, psychologically punishing Virgo in whatever way they see fit. Neither signs have much of a capacity for emotions which can make the emotional issues more difficult to deal with than usual.

However if the signs keep the relationship exciting this match can most definitely be successful. Both signs thrive in stable relationships and will combine Virgo’s rational-type-determination with Taurus’ romance oriented determination to create a secure, sensual relationship. Virgos generally have a very strong libido which can simultaneously be satisfied by and excite Taurus’ sensuality. Taurus has endless determination and patience which Virgo values and appreciates above most. Both signs are very humorous which means a good friendship between them can make a strong foundation for them to build on. Neither of these signs likes to be put too far out of their comfort sign which means both partners are quite content to keeps things the way they are. If these two can keep the relationship fun and stimulating, this pairing could be one for life.

Taurus and Libra:

Even though Taurus and Libra are the most compatible signs for each other, they do have their downsides. Libra being a very gentle and conflict-avoiding lover can be scared or thrown off my Taurus’ (hardly provoked yet terrifying) rage. Libra’s live and breathe love (whether it’s romantic or platonic) and have a flirtatious air about them. Taurus may confuse this for Libra being flirty with others and may take it very personally and hold resentment. Because of Libra’s hate for conflict and confrontation, they’ll often take the blame in relationships and apologise first to restore the relationship to its initial state of harmony. Taurus may use this to their disposal which can be quite unfair and upsetting to Libra. However Librans can be quite critical in their partnerships, in pursuit of the perfect partner. This may make Taurus feel self-conscious or insecure, making them retreat into themselves.

However, like I said, these signs are the most compatible signs for each other. Both signs LOVE partnership and value it equally but for different reasons which gives diversity to the relationship. Taurus is a very sensual partner, adding the spice to Libra’s love of romance to create a very dream-like relationship which can be a very relaxing aspect of their lives, the part where they can unwind and let loose. Both signs have a love for the arts, Taurus loves the arts that appeal to the senses (music, visual art, photography) and Libra loves the intellectual based arts (writing of all types, theatre). If Taurus isn’t too forceful with their stability, they can provide good grounding for Libra’s who sometimes tend to float from reality. If Taurus can learn to accept Libra’s flirty nature and not take it so seriously and Libra can ease up on the criticism, this match is very well suited for a long-term relationship.

Taurus and Scorpio:

These two signs are opposites, sister signs. As with any pairing that consists of opposites, it can either go really well or horribly wrong, depending on the amount of effort both signs are willing to put into it. Both of these signs are the most resentful, grudge-holding of the Zodiac which means that when they have a serious falling out, it will take them ages, if ever to restore harmony to the relationship. Both signs have a vicious temper when provoked which makes them a very dangerous couple if they’re aggressively inclined. Both signs are insensitive to each other’s emotions and since both feel things very deeply, this can lead to them getting very hurt. Taurus’ likes to have financial dominance in the relationship but Scorpio demands full control. Scorpios don’t enjoy being reliant and being relied on, and Taurus’ tend to be quite dependent in relationships.

However sister signs can be very compatible if they can understand their differences. Both signs expect nothing less than absolute loyalty from their partner and give it back in return, making a very stable foundation to build on. Scorpios need a lot of time for self-reflection and self-discovery in their lives and thus need a partner who will be patient and willing to let them grow. Patient Taureans are perfect for this. Taurus’ are very insensitive signs and might also have a problem communicating their emotions to their partner. Scorpios, being water signs, are very intuitive, and can tell when Taurus’ is having a hard time or is upset and can respond accordingly to avoid a big confrontation about it but at the same time comforting them. Scorpio can benefit from Taurus’ stability greatly since they need someone to keep them steady while they find themselves. Both signs are very emotionally resilient which promises a long lasting relationship. If these signs are willing to compromise, understand and accept each other’s differences, this can make a very promising relationship.

Taurus and Sagittarius:

Taurus and Sagittarius can be a very tricky match, as fire and earth signs generally are, but Sagittarius’ adventurous nature could compromise it even more. Sagittarius’ hate possessiveness, being the free-spirited learner of the Zodiac, Sagittarius needs freedom in a relationship if they’re going to make it work which means Taurus’ jealous nature could repel them. Taurus’ like to settle, to have a home type relationship but Sagittarius’ find it ridiculously hard to settle. Taurus’ craves structure and stability which Sagittarius doesn’t have, on the contrary, they can be quite irresponsible and tactless. Whereas Sagittarius’ are quite optimistic, Taureans are very rational and although Sagittarius can benefit from that, it could also bore them. Sagittarius’ have no time for grudges and resentment, and thus, if Taurus is going to try hold it over them, they will just back out.

This pairing can learn a lot from each other though if they are willing to compromise with one another. Taurus’ love for the arts and their sensual nature can appeal to Sagittarius a lot seeing as they love learning and experiencing things. Over time, as they get used to it, Sagittarians can find comfort in having stability and even find a way to make it exciting for both of them. Taurus can show the beauty of the home, romantic contentment and simplicity and Sagittarius can show Taurus the wonders of the outside world and things beyond their knowledge. This may scare Taurus but Sagittarius will be there to hold their hand. Basically, this relationship is one in which both partner s learn an awful lot about life, the world and themselves. If Taurus allows Sagittarius to satisfy their restlessness and Sagittarius makes an effort to commit to the relationship, this relationship will be a happy one.

Taurus and Capricorn:

Like other earth pairings, this one can be really good but also has its drawbacks. Capricorn is a very ambitious, work oriented sign and Taurus being a very home oriented yet ambitious sign, may feel challenged and neglected at the same time. They like to be financially dominant in the relationship and if their partner is outdoing them they may feel belittled. Capricorns are also very independent signs and need their own space, whereas Taurus’ who invest everything into their relationships can be quite dependent on their partner, sometimes overstepping boundaries. This can result in Capricorn feeling smothered and trying to back out. Capricorns can be quite pessimist which does effect the ending result of the relationship; whether or not it’ll work. Where Capricorn likes to be in control, Taurus can be possessive which can result in a power play between the two. If the two signs get caught up in just making the relationship last for the sake of the title, the relationship can grow stale.

However there is a lot to be said for this pairing, as earth signs are generally very successful in long-term relationships. Both enjoying stability and structure, the foundation of this relationship is very strong and sturdy. Taurus’ being the sign of comfort and sensuality loves to pamper and treat Capricorn who works hard and is quite self-sacrificial in their work (they tend to be stressed a lot). Capricorn notices Taurus’ practical potential and encourages them to be more disciplined and ambitious. A long-lasting relationship between these two will result in a very luxurious, materialistic home, since Taurus enjoys retail therapy and Capricorn can help make sure Taurus is being smart with their money. Capricorns buy things of high quality and longevity. If these signs can establish good boundaries, keep things interesting and meet each other half way, they can really work.

Taurus and Aquarius:

Earth and Air combinations are always quite an unusual pairing, Taurus and Aquarius are no exception to that. Aquarius loves freedom and individuality above all else. They do not care if their partner is jealous and they also won’t care if their partner is trying to make them jealous, seeing as they don’t have a jealous bone in their body. They really won’t appreciate Taurus’ jealous/possessive streak. The defence mechanism of an Aquarius is generally to pull away the more their partner pushes and since Taurus (out of desperation most likely because of their emotional investment) will push to try to make things right, Aquarius will keep pulling away. Both signs here are very opinionated and may clash on certain subjects (some may be quite important to either of them). Taurus craves intimacy and sensuality whereas Aquarius is more interested in a meeting of the minds and isn’t quite bothered with romance.

However these two can also be the pairing to move mountains. Aquarius is a very unconventional thinker and likes to come up with philosophies and ideas. Taurus comes across very strong and has the means to make these ideas and philosophies really sit with people. Working together, these two are a very influential couple. Although they don’t admit it, Aquarius’ needs routine, they may not like it, but they need it, Taurus naturally provides this for Aquarius without any confrontation that Aquarius may find embarrassing. Both signs value and desire and equal relationship, team work. Taurus provides unlimited patience while Aquarius deals with their own mind which can often kick up a storm when on the verge of a new idea. Aquarius can show Taurus all the benefits of intellectual stimulation, and show them new ideas that will really make them think and question. If Taurus can learn how to control their possessiveness and Aquarius can extend some intimacy, this pairing makes the perfect team.

Taurus and Pisces:

Earth and water signs tend to go quite well with one another, mainly because water is fluid and can change to suit the situation. However Pisces is a sensitive soul and can be scared of Taurus’ rage if they ever crossed them enough. Pisces don’t like conflict and will normally hold more of a passive aggressive stance in relationships. When Taurus isn’t getting the reaction they want, they’ll only go further, forcing Pisces to possibly shut down the emotional part of their psyche as a defence. Pisces can also be manipulative at the best of times when they want something. If Taurus catches on to this they can be greatly upset and hold onto it throughout the relationship. Taurus might be too overbearing in the relationship and Pisces as a very mutable sign likes to be able to flirt with other possibilities. Both signs can be quite delusional when it comes to their relationships, refusing to see something if they’re not happy with it. This can turn the relationship dangerous if they’re not careful.

However this pairing is also a very understanding one. Both tend to invest their emotions in their relationships so they both treat it with care and there isn’t a case of one person being more involved than the other, which is normally a problem for Taurus. Both of them hold the same values in the relationship; harmony and stability, which means there’s rarely any misunderstanding in the relationship or any kind of “what are we?” type questioning. Pisces being a very spiritual and transcendent sign can make the relationship a very awakening experience, mixed with Taurus’ sensuality, the energy between the two is very intense. Pisces’ intuition allows them to sense when something is wrong with Taurus and will do whatever they can to make them feel better. Pisces and Taurus relationships are usually very empathic in an unspoken way. Taurus doesn’t like to take risks which makes Pisces feel secure and safe while they dream away. With enough discipline on Pisces part, and self –control on Taurus’, this partnership is incredibly successful.

anonymous asked:

TELL ME WHAT U THINK ABOUT THE WAY LANCE IS LOOKING AT KEITH PLEASE!! WRITE THAT SONNET!! PLEASE

ok anon i’ve been at dinner w/ family for like two hours now thinking about this and like

all i can think about is that lance and keith have had the most demonstrable growth in their relationship of like, anyone in the show? you have established relationships, like coran and allura, or pidge/lance/hunk, or keith and shiro, but as far as introduced relationships, lance and keith have come the furthest from where they started, and i can just – i see why they would look to lance to help comfort him. i know that hunk and keith have bonded a little, but it’s not the same. lance and keith butt heads a lot but they’re really alike, and i think lance knows how keith is feeling – i think they know, either instinctively or openly, that they get each other. it’s why they can agitate each other so easily. 

so for lance to just step forward and be the one who acknowledges ‘yeah i’m the person to comfort keith right now’ is just!!! it feels really significant!!! it has to be lance who does this because lance is who keith is closest with right now! and the way lance is looking at keith – listen i didn’t see it so i don’t know exactly what they say, but i know that lance is convincing keith that shiro doesn’t want keith to wallow in misery looking for him, that shiro would want them to move forward. lance isn’t trying to cheer keith up, he’s not being the group jokester (which they could have had him do, they could have had him be goofy and try to lighten the mood) he’s being serious and trying to help him in his grieving process. he’s trying to help keith accept what’s happened. i look at that picture of lance looking at keith and i see a person who genuinely cares about keith, who wants to make this easier for him. who wants to help him move forward. i see a person who’s willing to show that he’s a shoulder for keith to lean on, someone he can come to for advice. i see the foundation for a partnership we’ve been told is coming and is realistic and is possible. and i’m really, really excited about that.

Tony and Ryan: Toxic Relationship

I really want to know more about what happened in that relationship. It’s pretty clear that Tony didn’t really like Ryan and now thinks he’s not a good person.
And I’m pretty sure that Ryan was a very shitty boyfriend. It’s obvious in what Tony says about him “he’s serious about the magazine, his shoes and not much else,” and “you think I would be friends with a guy like Ryan,” “when I was with Ryan he would say ‘this is tony, my boyfriend’ like he owned me.”
But also in that small scene with the college panels where Tony freaks out a little saying to Ryan that he doesn’t need college, I think the moments leading up to that was Ryan trying to convince Tony of what to do with his life.
In the scene outside of the mustang, with Brad and Tony, Brad reassures Tony that Brad isn’t Ryan, so it’s clear that they’ve talked about Tony’s past relationship and that it wasn’t a good one.
There’s one more part to this that is really striking. It’s when Tony tells clay that “a lot of people know” that he’s gay. Maybe Ryan sorta forced Tony to come out or even outed him. Tony doesn’t really try to hide his sexuality in present time in the show, but maybe when he was dating Ryan he wasn’t totally comfortable with people knowing.
I think that Ryan tried to control Tony and shape him into 'Ryan’s perfect boyfriend.’ But Tony is his own person so he ditched that #EgotisticalJackass and moved on. Although the relationship between him and Ryan did mess him up a little, that’s where Brad comes in and is the best to Tony. It’s also why Tony does things like, introducing Brad as 'my friend’ because he doesn’t want to be the controlling boyfriend that Ryan was.
I just love Tony and want him to be happy with Brad.

Shadowhunters is Finally Getting Good: A Writer’s Perspective

This is going to get long, so basically this is where I’m going:

1. Shadowhunters is still finding itself, similar to how Buffy the Vampire Slayer kinda sucked until it grabbed onto its “Monsters as Life Metaphors” structure halfway through Season 2.

2. Because The Mortal Instruments series is such a catastrophic narrative failure, Shadowhunters doesn’t have compelling plot points to string their own original story between, the way True Blood was able to do with their own sub-par source material.

3. The strong character writing is just starting to free the show from the restrictions of its source material.

Where We Are Now

-The company that owns the rights to The Mortal Instruments is using Shadowhunters to return on a damaged investment. They bought the rights to a popular book series, and made a movie that bombed so hard that when the numbers came in, they stopped production on the sequel within weeks. They lost a shit ton of money on what should have been a good investment, and were unwilling to throw too much good money after bad, which is why there wasn’t much investment in the first season. The first season’s low budget affects more than the special effects. It plays into who they can hire, how long they have to rehearse, how long they have to shoot, every element of production.

-The source material is shit, and it’s an albatross around the show’s neck. The movie sucked so hard because it was a pretty faithful adaption of the books, which are torturously long, and full of one note characters who only exist to spout faux-clever dialogue, or facilitate CC’s incest fantasies. They are driven by entirely by plot, not character, which makes for flat fiction.

-The first season had to be, to an extent, experimental. They had to figure out the right mix between what they had to keep to engage book fans, and what they had to add to make it possible for it to be a TV show, because the book doesn’t have enough material to be a couple seasons of TV.

-The first season worked to clear the very low bar of of being less racist, tokenist, slut-shaming, girl-hating, bi-phobic, and all around disgusting than the books.
They succeeded.
Yay.

-Successfully moving past the tragedy of the movie into an expanded episode order and expanded budget mean that season two is essentially a brand new show.

- That season is trying to fight its way free of what it had to be in the first season, and the failure of the movie, and the ball and chain of the books.

The Problems

1. The Show Has Turned Every Pointless, Cardboard Dialogue Spouter from the Books into a Compelling, Nuanced Character, and Now There Are Too Many

The book characters have interesting things on their character sheets, but never become interesting. The show has recomposited characters out of the character elements used in the books, and created complex, compelling, nuanced characters, who have ties and relationships to eachother, who are impacted by the world around them, and who make decisions and affect the world around them and eachother, instead of just waiting around for Clary to discover her special rune magic, or for Magnus to portal them somewhere.

Unfortunately, a bunch of cardboard cutouts creating obstacles to, and eventually enabling brother-sister fucking don’t suck up too much plot time, but 11 suddenly worth-while characters (Clary, Simon, Alec, Isabelle, Jace, Maryse, Jocelyn, Luke, Raphael, Maia, Magnus) plus a few new additions we are invested in to some degree (Lydia, Aldertree, Iris), and a few random additions that don’t seem to do much but create more dialogue and scoot plots along (Valentine, Meliorn, Raj, Max, Dot, Gretel, Suspiciously Important Girl With Glasses) all end up battling for screen time, to the detriment of each other.

For every charming interaction between Maia and Simon, we don’t get to see Luke dealing with Jocelyn’s death. When we get a glimpse into the tenderness of Magnus and Raphael’s relationship, there’s less time to see Magnus and Alec learn where they cross and divide. When we see that Alec and Maryse still love each other, even if the have so much shit left to work through , that takes potential minutes away from someone trying to talk to Jace about being abducted and tortured. There is so much potential, and it’s not possible to turn all of it into plot when there are only 45 minutes a week to work with.

1A. Except Valentine, Who is A Spectacularly Shitty Villain

Valentine is one long HHHHHHHZZZZZZMMMMMMMHHHHHhhzzzzmmmmhhhh on an evil kazoo.

A good villain is the hero of their own story, but they have to be more than that. A good villain has to taunt you with the possibility that they could be the hero of your story. They have to want something in a way that you can understand the wanting, even if what they want isn’t something you would want.

Kylo Ren is a good villain. He wants to be a super powerful Jedi and big deal leader in the Empire and the movie shows you that he wants that because he’s actually a pathetic little snot streak, drowning in his inability to live up to the standards of toxic masculinity around him, while wearing a silly helmet. The desire makes sense.

Spider-Man Villains are good villains. They are typically super smart scientists trying to solve a problem, but their science gives them some sort of mutation that casts them out of the society they were trying to improve.

Magneto is a great villain. A holocaust survivor who believes he sees the writing on the wall and won’t let history repeat itself.  

(Quick fact about Oncethrown: I went to go see the Johnny Depp version of Sweeny Todd in theaters in college and didn’t realize he was the villain until the very last scene. (The last last scene. Even after he throws Mrs. Lovett in the oven) Because he was unfairly jailed by a man who wanted him gone so that he could rape Sweeny todd’s wife to be raped into insanity and leave her out on the street to rot, and I was totally onboard with the quest for vengeance up until the moment the blood started pouring out if his neck.)

Valentine is just generically evil. He was born into the most powerful class in his world, was annoyed that his society wouldn’t let him become even more powerful, and now is experimenting on a class he already could kill with little to no repercussions, and working to eradicate them… because he can?

He doesn’t love or care about anyone either. There’s nothing to hold onto about Valentine. He’s just an opposing force. He could be a block of wood with angry eyebrows and the effect on the plot would be about the same.

1B. Except Aldertree, Who We Were Promised Would Be And Interesting Villain is Just A Random Force For Bad.

Aldertree came in to bring the erratic New York Institute back under Clave control. And he started out doing that. He threw the downworlders out of the Institute, he left Jace to rot in jail because he wouldn’t swear total fealty to the Clave, he nearly let Alec die because he threatened very important Shadowhunter traditions by refusing to marry a suitable woman in order to date a man, and a downworlder.

The yin-fen plot line originally was in this same functional but boring vein, until the last episode (spoilers) where he was clearly trying to get Izzy to trade sex for drugs (end spoilers). Generic Rapist Evil not interesting either. All he ended up doing was giving Alec a “Reclaiming the Institute Plotline” which would have been a really, really good piece in that whole “Effects of Institutionalizing Discrimination” theme… if any time had been devoted to it at all this season. Like… Alec originally ceded his authority to Lydia. The way he came for Aldertree just wasn’t given the building blocks to be satisfying.

2. The Books Didn’t Have Layers, and the Show is Trying to Graft an Interesting Theme Onto the Book’s Pocked and Diseased Foundation

The books are just an excuse for incest. The show is attempting to develop a narrative about institutionalized discrimination and oppression, and how characters are influenced by the way that affects their societies, upbringings, relationships and lives.

There is a really underdeveloped attempt at this in the books which more or less boils down to “Shadowhunters are mean to downworlders, and it’s not totally fair, but they are still the heroes, because they are all described as sexually attractive.”

The show is running into a lot of complications as they try to smoosh this theme onto the source material they have to work with.

-The main plot of “Evil McEvil is a Racist Who Wants To Start A Genocide Because Of Evil and Overt Racism”is sucking up all the air in the room for more compelling and important elements of the show,  such as every idea presented in Maia and Simon’s conversation about how Shadowhunters pretend that everyone is on the same team, but don’t understand what the daily existence of downworlders is really like in a world that Shadowhunters essentially rule.

Or Alec’s struggle to be both a Shadowhunter and a gay man falling in love with a downworlder.

Or Isabelle and Lydia’s season one speaking out about Law vs. Justice in the Shadowhunter world.

Or Clary’s 10 minute plot about not being trained well enough to be a real shadowhunter, but knowing too much to ever be a mundane again

The adherence to the main plot of book one and two is one of the things turning Clary into a mess of a white savior who doesn’t learn from her mistakes. She’s the entry point character, she’s bringing us into this world, and she’s the hero of the story. So… she’s white and straight with magic powers, trying to solve racism and homophobia in a story where the whole society she enters into is built around it, and has been for centuries.

3. The Clusterfuck of Potential We Are Working Out Of Now

So 2.08 and 2.09 I think prove that we are watching a show that is just about to get there. Both of these episodes had insular plots solved within the confines of the episode while also having consequences in the season stretching story.

Good characters are interacting with each other in interesting ways. (Except Lydia. Where is Lydia? I love her and I want her back) There are some growing pain failures (everything Izzy has said and done all season), some serious fuck ups (the lack of consent before the lack of malec sex scene) and a lot of unfortunate leaning on shitty and easy tropes (Izzy and Raphael fall into a drug fueled affair, Alec pushes Magnus into sex in a 3 minute side plot, Valentine exists and we have to watch him) But they are setting up more and more really solid pieces with places to go and I’m excited to see it happen.

4. The Things They Need to Fix (this is mostly rambling)

-Give fewer characters better plots per episode instead of trying to give everyone a couple minutes of screen time.

-Give characters goal and personality and development driven season arcs that create plots instead of having them constantly reacting to plot elements that are not character driven (purely from a writing standpoint, this is the biggest flaw with Isabelle’s plot line. The addiction drives her plot, not her personality, and Aldertree doesn’t have a character based reason to give her the drug to being with. “Just because I’m an asshole” isn’t really good enough. That’s why Alec is the best part of season 1. Everything he says and does is driven by a couple easily defined elements of his character.)

-If you are going to sell the diversity aspect of your show, be aware of the full context of the plot lines you are assigning your actors. It’s not great that there are 4 latinx actors, and the two of them with accents are in a drug dealing/addiction/sex for drugs plot line. It’s great that your only canon couple is a gay interracial couple. It’s great that they got a really sweet build up, and they have great communication scenes and they are really building a strong relationship. It’s not great that they do not touch while a lot of totally gratuitous sex is happening around them.

-Figure out who you really need, and jettison the dead weight.
-Why is Raj still on this show? All he does is say nasty shit about women. He’s disgusting, he’s boring, and he’s pointless. Literally every single time he’s on screen he could be replaced by someone we care about and it would tighten the episode.
-We ditched Robert because as far as the impact on the main characters goes, he’s a redundancy on Maryse’s storyline, and she has all the good elements.
-Aldertree is pointless. Maryse could have had Aldertree’s “WE ARE REALLY FUCKING GOING WITH WHAT THE CLAVE SAYS” storyline and it would have been a lot more interesting with the rest of the plot.Lydia could have had that plot too. “You fucked up at the wedding, reign in this nonsense or we are shipping you our to wrangle island”