trying to learn some shit here

advice for people in school, taking notes

yo, since it’s that time of year, here’s my unsolicited advice on how to take notes. it’s primarily for college or high school folks but i suppose anyone who is in a positive to take notes could use this.

here’s the advice:

make your notes as CASUAL as possible. by which i mean, put them in your voice, make them funny, use memes, write out information as if you were texting it to your friend, curse!, use everyday phrases and weird internet speak, relate it to your life if possible!, fucking hashtag that shit, relate it to things you like, write out academic articles like they are just Drama happening to your friends, etc etc– do this in class and when doing the readings and when making studying guides for tests!!

even if you are taking notes on the reading and you have NO IDEA what is going on (real talk: im doing reading for my english masters right now and i have NO IDEA what this man is saying), try to get the basic gist or even if you can tell the writer feels negatively or positively towards a particular subject, WRITE THAT SHIT DOWN. 

Here are honest to god, some examples from my notes right now:

  • I have literally no idea what this man is saying– it seems to be something about God?– the difference between learning stuff just for the sake of learning and learning stuff to make order and sense and “find God” 
  • Culture is the study of perfection and goes beyond religion because we make up religion and culture is about more than us?? its possible that’s what this dude is saying. i give it a 60-40 shot.
  • DONT TRUST MACHINERY. EVERYTHING IS MACHINERY. WEALTH IS JUST MACHINERY. CULTURE MATTERS OVER MONEY/MACHINERY/RELIGION/EVERYTHINGGG. GOOO CULTURE!
  • will he ever writer a sentence shorter than 8 lines long??? #probablynot
  • I am not totally convinced by his culture= perfection argument but then again that could be the exact opposite of what he’s saying. 
  • “Another newspaper, representing, like the Nonconformist, one of the religious organisations of this country, was a short time ago giving an account of the crowd at Epsom on the Derby day, and of all the vice and hideousness which was to be seen in that crowd; and then the writer turned suddenly round upon Professor Huxley, and asked him how he proposed to cure all this vice and hideousness without religion. I confess I felt disposed to ask the asker this question: And how do you propose to cure it with such a religion as yours? How is the ideal of a life so unlovely, so unattractive, so narrow, so far removed from a true and satisfying ideal of human perfection, as is the life of your religious organisation as you yourself image it, to conquer and transform all this vice and hideousness?” 10 – I mean i do fuck with this part tho
  • He’s at Oxford. Fucking loves Oxford. On Oxford’s dick

the point is, i clearly don’t really know what’s going on, but hopefully the professor will clue me in and i’ll at least have some idea of what he said by the end of it. plus just writing your notes in a fun casual way is going to make reading back over them SO much more enjoyable and memorable! (there’s science to back this up but i gotta finish this work so no time to fact check myself now just trust me)

alright, advice over. good luck with school dudes!

[OH Also, if you write a direct quote in your notes– ALWAYS WRITE THE PAGE NUMBER. you’ll need that shit if you use it in a paper.]

anonymous asked:

Idk why I thought this but I have to know, out of naruto, who do you think are the most savage? Who are the straight savages in their respectable arena like, I gotta know. Who gives no fucks?

LMAOOO damn this is funny

Madara is obviously a straight savage. Savage since he was first introduced in the show holy shit. Came out of his edo tensei coffin like a savage too he didn’t even wait for the shit to open he blew the door off like who tf does that like been dead for yearsssss and he comes back just as salty, just as savage. Dropped not one but TWO meteors on all these shinobi he just fucked their shit up. Broke the edo tensei release at the last second just to come back down and beat ass. His entire fight vs the 5 Kage was just one savage L like every damn thing he said and did was savage. Roasted them the entire time too. So disrespectful. Let himself get stabbed straight through the damn bicep like a straight savage. Had his eyes closed 40% of the time he was fighting Naruto Sasuke Sai the bijuu like everyone and their momma like damn. I’m gonna say he’s the #1 savage. Everything he does is savage

Ay is a savage like you see the way he beat Sasuke’s ass that one time holllly shit no mercy Sasuke thought he had him with that Amaterasu and Ay went SIKE

Tobirama’s definitely a savage. Top tier savage. All he had to do was lift one finger and had everyone losing their shit. Came one finger close to ending Sasuke’s life. Sassed the shit out of the Sage of Six Paths like who does that. All around straight savage, too real, realest Kage to ever live. Takes no shit from anyone ever. All the while looking spiffy as fuck with the fur collar. Damn. What a classy savage

I knew Itachi was a savage the minute he roasted the shit out of Orochimaru and beat his ass at the same time. Trying to steal Itachi’s body and shit??? Orochimaru doesn’t learn. That entire final fight with Sasuke I just couldn’t believe Itachi throwing this boy around and shit like actually grabbing him and THROWING him like it was nbd. Also, when he and Sasuke fought Kabuto. And Kabuto wouldn’t stop talking. And Itachi was basically like “Stop talking. You die here.” i WAS LIKE OH HE BOUT TO DO IT OHOHO MYGOD

Gai is honestly a savage. How disrespectful he gotta be to forget Kisame EVERY DAMN TIME THEY MEET. Mainly, opening the eighth gate OOOOOOOO. Soon as those eyebrows lit up I knew some savage shit was about to go down he went the fuck in. Did not hesitate to fuck shit up

Hashirama may not be a textbook savage but there are times he’s raw af. That time he overrided Tobirama’s savageness with his own savageneess to make double the savage. Anytime he goes into sage mode. How is it not savage to summon that big wooden 1000 hands shit like, basically to bitch slap the shit out of people 1000 times like 1000 backhands boy wtf

Neji was pretty much the OG savage I can’t believe how much savagery he passed around in the Chuunin exams he was really out here trying to end lives 

Roommate Problems

“I fucking hate college boys!”

Adam is livid, yelling, not even bothering to say hello, how are you? Ronan holds his phone out, away from his ear and steps out onto the front porch. The sun is setting, dousing the fields in hazy, golden light. Ronan leans against the porch railing and listens, a small smirk twisting his lips.

“Language, Parrish.”

You don’t get to call me out on my language, Ronan Lynch!” Adam huffs, exasperated.

“So…what’s so fucking terrible about college boys, College Boy?”

Adam growls and Ronan hears a door being slammed, the dull pulse of music, laughter.

“Jackson and Darren brought their friends over to celebrate 420.”

Ronan grins, delighted. “Shit.”

“Yes, exactly. The entire suite smells like pot and they keep playing this god-awful music about getting tipsy and fucking girls. I swear to God, I am this close to reporting them to the RA.”

“I’m sorry, babe, that sucks.” Ronan pulls a slender joint out of the pocket of one of Adam’s old flannel shirts. Opal’s napping with Chainsaw and while he doesn’t make smoking a habit today is special. He sparks the tip and listens to Adam rant.

“And then,” Adam continues, really worked up, “Darren’s friend brought like three bottles of Fireball and they all started doing shots and playing some ridiculous drinking game. Like all this hella stupid shit and God, what am I even doing here, Ronan? College feels like such a joke sometimes.”

“Hella?” Ronan’s voice feels different in his throat, probably due to the smoke.

“Oh, shut up.”

Ronan laughs quietly and gets up to walk through the fields. The grass is cool against his bare feet.

“Gansey spoiled you for college life, Adam. You’re never going to meet anyone like him, no one who gets such a hard on for learning.”

Adam scoffs at hard on but he doesn’t try to deny it.

“I thought it would be better than this,” he says. There’s real sorrow and disappointment in his voice. Ronan hates that Adam is gone, but even more he hates that Adam is unhappy.

“It will be,” Ronan says. “You just gotta find your tribe, man. Go to the library and find your fellow nerds. Study with them and forget about your fucking roommates.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Adam mutters. “It’s just, I’m paying to live in that room and I can’t even be in there right now.”

Ronan takes another hit, holding it in, enjoying the buzz building. Everything feels nice and lazy.

“I know,” he replies, his words drifting dreamily from his mouth. “But things’ll get better. You can move off campus next year, right? And you’ll start your classes in your major…it’ll work out.”

Adam doesn’t say anything for a while. Ronan can sense him stewing, thinking.

“How do you know so much about how college works?” Adam finally demands.

“Shit, I may live in the country but I do read, Adam.”

Adam snorts. “More like watched every season of some stupid college show.”

“Yeah, that too,” Ronan agrees easily. He’s walking by the cows, offering pats and scratching behind ears. The animals nuzzle against him, nearly knocking him over. “Anyways, I can kick Jackson’s ass the next time I visit. That dude is overdue.”

Adam laughs for real. “Yes, he is. Darren’s alright, most of the time.”

“Mmhmm,” Ronan hums. The house looks so good from the fields, the lights in the windows glowing welcome. The swallows dip and dive above the many barns, heading to their nests for the night. Fireflies rise from the tall grass, drawn to Ronan the way all his dream things are.

“Miss you,” Ronan says softly. It’s true. He never knew how hard long distance would be, how much it would hurt.

“Miss you, too,” Adam responds, and the irritation is gone from his voice, replaced by longing.

“Come home soon, okay?” Ronan holds his breathe, waiting. The sun goes down behind the trees.

“I will,” Adam promises. “Give Opal a hug for me, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t kill your roommates, or, don’t get caught.”

A small laugh. “I never get caught.”

“Magician.”

“Dreamer.”

After Adam hangs up Ronan lays down in the field, small mice scurrying up to see if he has crumbs, the deer nosing out of the woods to settle down near him. Opal is making a racket looking for him, Chainsaw calling. Ronan finishes off his joint, watching the smoke rise into the air. He makes a finger gun and shoots it at the sky. He lets the smoke mellow him out, removing the sting of Adam’s absence, and the lingering sorrow for all that’s been lost. For now it’s a beautiful evening and his College Boy is coming home, not now, but soon.

anonymous asked:

*coughs* svt reaction to their s.o secretly being really kinky ugcfugiglhjdufog k bye

Seungcheol 

you already kno daddy s.coups would fucking LOVE that shit okay he’s not even lowkey about it either he’s so kinky deep down inside

Originally posted by beautifulcarats

Jeonghan

i deadass think he’s secretly kinky too ok,,,like behind all the angel ish, he’s really kinky and loves to be in control

Originally posted by snowonwoo

Jisoo

OKAY YOU MIGHT ALL THINK OH THE GENTLEMAN OF SEVENTEEN AKA JOSHUA but i really think he’s kinky. i think he’s  a sub & likes to beg a loT AH

Originally posted by scoupy

Junhui

???? you already know this little shit is kinky as FUCK, why are you reading that? he’d eat sleep & breathe for that shit dAMN u found the right guy 

Originally posted by 12fools

Soonyoung

i really don’t know, i think he’s like joshua; a sub who whines & begs a lot buT WAIT I JUST READ A SMUT ABT HIM BEING A DOM WHATS THE TRUTH HERE HOSHI

Originally posted by visual-17

Wonwoo

another one i don’t know abt, i highkey feel he’d be confused but still willing to try some of the stuff you liked

Originally posted by visual-17

Jihoon

sUB SUB SUB I THINK HE’D LOVE HOW KINKY YOU ARE but he’d hide it by just like laughing at you pretending that he wasnt turned on by this but bitch he was

Originally posted by cutiepatoodie

Seokmin

dom ???? he’d probably lowkey be into this too i see him as a manly dom fuCK ME UP BITCH

Originally posted by ldks

Mingyu

like jun, this cocky little bitch will LOVE this shit okay he’s just as kinky as you

Originally posted by wonwoossshi

Minghao

we’ve already learned that minghao is a fucking savage right ??? so don’t you think he’d be cocky in  bed? i also think he’d enjoy this factor of you

Originally posted by mystarsandmoonhao

Seungkwan

he’s grossed out but turned on at the same time

Originally posted by dank-svt-memes

Hansol

listen ok i can’t decided if he’s a sub or dom prolly just vanilla asf hansol would probably be turned on, but he wouldn’t know how to express it properly

Originally posted by vernon---baby

Chan

listen buddy i feel he’d be exactly like our boy vernon; turned on, but too shy to express it.

Originally posted by jeonfhan

reaction requests are open for; seventeen, 2ne1, exo(o12), bts, got7, and blackpink. 

being lab partners with peter parker

thank you to @nedslaptop​ for requesting this i love cate sm and i haven’t updated frustrating, i’m such a fake so here are some hcs to keep y'all busy while i try and finish that imagine :)


• so let’s not lie

• you’d have a little crush on peter

• nothing too extreme since you barely know him (because this boy barely talks to anyone he’s not comfortable around) but you know that he’s sweet and cute and seems like an all around good guy

• plus once you overheard him and mj discussing racism and how he wanted to ‘learn more about intersectional feminism and how he can be apart of ‘fighting against all the shit happening in the world’

• and honestly you’ve approved of him ever since

• in science you sneak glances at him from across the room when you really should be paying attention to the lesson

• and you clear your throat when he’s busy looking at stuff on his laptop and not listening

• you guys are DEFINITELY on a first name basis and you’ve had a couple conversations but nothing really serious

you wish it was serious

• then one day you walk into class late (by like a minute, come on mrs. g, don’t give me a detention) and everyone’s already partnered up and you check the list by the board

and you see your last name next to PETER PARKER on the seating charts for your latest project

• and well, shit

Keep reading

I know I'm going to sound like I'm betraying my people here, but it needs to be said....

I’m really starting to feel, and I know I’m not the first one to say it, that the whole “polyglot community” thing has some issues.

1. It’s taking something that is actually just a fact of life for many (cf. Africa as a whole) and making it seem rarefied and special.

2. It seems there are a lot of people who are just collecting languages like trinkets to put on a shelf, or some kind of parlor trick to perform, and often not even sticking with one long enough to truly absorb it, but hopping onto the next shiny new language that catches their attention as soon as the going gets tough/boring. That’s not what languages are for.

3. Which leads me to ask, what are people actually *doing* with these languages? Learning about the cultures and histories they come from, or just getting back pats for being a superhyperpolyglot?

4. If you’re learning for the love of learning that’s fantastic! If you’re learning because you want to use your knowledge to help yourself or others, even better! But remember, multilingualism is actually the norm for a significant number of our species, and most of them don’t have conferences where they get together to talk about how to be polyglot entrepreneurs or see how many languages they can use in two days. They just live their lives.

5. Speaking of polyglot entrepreneurs…IT’S NOT THAT COMPLICATED TO LEARN A LANGUAGE FFS. Much like bodybuilding, everything you need to learn a language is out there for FREE. A good teacher in a face to face (or even virtual) setting can be great and some people need that, but the basics of learning are (here it comes, the secret so many pay good money for): discipline, study, practice, feedback. That’s it. It’s not always fun or easy or but it works. If anyone is trying to sell you on their “one crazy trick” or product that will make you, ahem, fluent in 3 months, they’re full of shit (especially if they later go back and say by fluent they didn’t mean fluent and by 3 they didn’t mean 3…just sayin’).
Some people may have tips or tweaks that help you, and that’s great, but the fundamentals are the same, and available to all, free.

Inbred European royalty have been multilingual for centuries, you don’t need a polyglot guru to help you learn a language, but you do need to know why you’re investing your time and energy besides “ooh pretty”. Buckle down, do the work, have a goal in mind, and you’ll get there.

✧ ( TRUE BLOOD SENTENCE STARTERS.

warning: triggers apply. adult language, sexual themes, violence. change pronouns to your liking/as you see fit!

❛ Hi, I’m looking for that thick translucent plastic sheeting. ❜
❛ Uh… We don’t sell that here. You can try at Home Depot’s.. ❜
❛ I cannot believe you don’t have that here. ❜
❛ That’s nasty talk, I won’t listen to that. ❜
❛ They ain’t scared of you, honey child. ❜
❛ When I wear makeup, I get bigger tips.  ❜
❛ Not everybody wants to have sex with you. ❜
❛ Y'all bitches don’t know what you’re missing. ❜
❛ Do you have any of that synthetic bottled blood? ❜
❛ You have any idea who you’re messing with? ❜
❛ I have no sex life to speak of, so … ❜
❛ Wonder how much one would charge for something like that? ❜
❛ Do I taste different from other people? ❜
❛ May I ask you a personal question? ❜
❛ You said you could glamour somebody into letting you bite them? ❜
❛ You don’t like not being able to control people, do you? ❜
❛ Why can’t I hear your thoughts? Do you even have any thoughts? ❜
❛ I think we need to stop seeing each other. ❜
❛ I had to bury my bloody clothes because I didn’t want my grandmother to find out. ❜
❛ Who’d have thought? Getting carded at a vampire bar. ❜
❛ They don’t die. I’ve got nothing but a future with one. ❜
❛ Take me in you. Feel me in you. We are together. ❜
❛ See bitch. You gonna wish you ain’t did that. Watch. ❜
❛ Do you think they’re capable of lovin’ a person? ❜
❛ We started many of the mysteries about ourselves centuries ago. ❜
❛ Now if I remember what feelings were, mine might be hurt. ❜
❛ Does that weird you out? We could always go someplace else! ❜
❛ Everyone has to eat, right? We are all links on the universal food chain. ❜
❛ I texted you three times… Why didn’t you reply? ❜
❛ Right now you need to do is change out of your clothes.. there’s vampire in your cleavage. ❜
❛ You’ve done this before, haven’t you? ❜
❛ I chose it. I chose it when I chose you. ❜
❛ So why don’t you go to sleep and let me be the one to worry about it. ❜
❛ So why don’t we just leave it on me, okay? ❜
❛ Oh my God, you are even better looking than you were yesterday. ❜
❛ You broke an ancient and fundamental law. ❜
❛ However, I’m feeling a bit… creative. ❜
❛ I find myself doubting whether you were ever truly human. ❜
❛ Your blood was replaced with mine. ❜
❛ I’ve been trying to explain to you at length, you have been made vampire! ❜
❛ Crap on your rules! Crap, crap, crap! ❜
❛ I don’t obey anybody! Those days are over. ❜
❛ How would you like to learn how a real vampire feeds? ❜
❛ There are others who would have done far worse and you know it. ❜
❛ Why won’t you leave me alone? ❜
❛ The vamps here are scary as shit. ❜
❛ Talk to me. Lean on me. I’ve leaned on you plenty. ❜
❛ We can go some where else if that’s how you feel about it. ❜
❛ Who cares? What matters is being with the people you love. ❜
❛ Your history is so fucked up, you have no clue what family is! ❜
❛ That’s not fair. I do have a clue. ❜
❛ This is not your territory. You have no voice here.. ❜
❛ For a vampire, you are a terrible liar. ❜
❛ What makes you think I want him back? That I’d even take him back?  ❜
❛ What are you doin’ here? I ain’t said nothin’ to nobody. ❜
❛ That can be arranged quite easily. ❜
❛ You know I don’t love you! ❜
❛ What more can I give? What is it that you want from me? ❜
❛ I let you into my house, into my bed, and into my heart. ❜
❛ All I stood for, all I believed in, I violated to be with you! ❜
❛ There are wolves in our hen house. We must defend our flock. ❜
❛ I could have you outta here in seconds. ❜
❛ The other humans wouldn’t think twice about hurting us. ❜
❛ You expect us to sit on our thumbs while you round up your men to come lynch us?  ❜
❛ I do not wish to create blood shed when none is called for. ❜ 
❛ Stand down, everyone. People, go home. It’s over now. ❜
❛ Now, I reckon I’ve already been to heaven. It was inside your wife. ❜
❛ Oh, hello darling. I was just getting to know your plaything. ❜
❛ You always did like to prey on the innocent.  ❜
❛ We had two marvelous nights in your hotel room. ❜
❛ There’s no excuse for domestic violence. ❜
❛ The bullets would’ve pushed themselves out. ❜
❛ I ain’t perfect either. I’m the guy people laugh at. ❜
❛ And how were we supposed to know that this time he meant it? ❜
❛ And who has to fucking clean that up? Me, not you, Me. ❜
❛ How’d they manage to abduct you? ❜
❛ Was it one minute or two minutes?! ❜
❛ Where were you tonight around eleven o'clock? ❜
❛ How many vampires have gone missing in your area? ❜
❛ Let’s go to the ladies room and stare at ourselves in the mirror. ❜
❛ If I do get into some kind trouble, you’ll feel it right? ❜
❛ What are you?!? What are you?!? A-a demon? A devil?! ❜
❛ Hey, Bud. Wait up. Where you going’? ❜
❛ Every time we clear one murder, two more spring up. ❜
❛ That was the best sex I’ve had in decades. ❜
❛ Didn’t you hear me? I quit! I’ve had it with this shit! ❜
❛ You should be more concerned with what I want from you. ❜
❛ Why were they all shiftin’? You almost shifted. ❜
❛ You have always so enjoyed making others suffer. ❜
❛ I welcome death because only then will I be truly free of the disease that is you! ❜
❛ Your nature?! It was never mine! ❜
❛ You haven’t suffered at the hands of others for a very long time. ❜
❛ I thought you would have been excited. ❜
❛ Fuck the Authority! It won’t be able to prove a thing. ❜
❛ Things may be getting complicated soon. ❜
❛ I’m afraid I acted somewhat impulsively while I was gone.. ❜
❛ It won’t be able to prove a thing. I made sure of that. ❜
❛ What good would it do to share my pain with you? ❜
❛ If I can’t go on, you must make a new vampire. ❜
❛ We’ve lived through so much for so long. It can’t end this quickly… ❜
❛ A hundred years I’ve been with you. ❜

anonymous asked:

you should honestly try harder with your english it's quite shitty

Honestly english is my third language, I also draw, sing, am an actor, I’ve also won a free college cause Im so damn smart that I didnt need to pay for it, I am also VERY successful in every fucking thing I do. 

 So I need to ask for you, AMAZING PERSON THAT CAN WRITE ON ENGLISH RIGHT to fuck yourself :D Come here and talk to me in my three languages and I may take you seriously.

 I SHIT to english. It is not the most amazing-perfect-beautiful language in the world. Is not my obligation to know it perfectly. I DONT CARE :D I only speak english here cause most of the guys here speak english cause it is MORE EASY (you can read my language is harder for you to learn).

 You ppl are really arrogant, u really think non natives should not just speak your language but also do it perfectly. Guess what, GO YOU AND LEARN SOME LANGUAGES LAZY ARROGANT ASS :D

 You should honestly try harder with yourself, you are not half of me, its quite shitty. 

Happy April First, Adventurers! 

So a while back adventurer generalpoedameron shared with us that they were trying a bunch of different veggies to figure out what they like. You guys responded by sharing lots of recipes with us! It was so much fun. So for April, your quest is to share a recipe with us. Then try and make a recipe someone else has shared. If this works out we’ll all learn a bunch and eat some really good food! 

For my part, here is a recipe that’s changed my life on account of how easy it is.

Root Beer Pulled Pork

  • 2 lbs of pork shoulder or butt 
  • 12 oz. can root beer 
  • 1 (18 oz.) bottle barbecue sauce
  • chili powder

Throw all that shit into the crockpot on low for 4-6 hours. 

Drain that shit.

Shred it with a fork and cover with your favorite BBQ sauce.

Put it on Hawaiian buns and love yourself. 

Our Little Secret (Part 7)

Reader x Bucky
WC
1271
Summary After your friendship with Steve ends, you’re sent on an undercover mission with his best friend.
AN This is really the first thing I’ve written to this length that I might actually finish. You have no idea how big a deal this is. Thank you to each and everyone of you for reading! It really means the world to me!
Warnings


As you made your way down to the kitchen you heard the commotion of the kitchen staff behind the closed doors. Pausing you turned and entered the formal dining room, taking your seat at the head of the table. You didn’t have to wait for long before someone came in. You knew she was waiting to be addressed so before you made your request for breakfast you asked her her name. She introduced herself as Marta and you then ordered for both you and Bucky, dismissing her.

He entered the room catching the tail end of your dismissal. You caught the smirk on his face and he quickly sat next to you, taking your hand. Rubbing his thumb over yours he leaned in and spoke, so low only you could hear, “You know, this spoiled princess routine really fits you. Something you wanna tell me?”

You giggled, lightly, “Hush you. I’m trying to have fun with it.”

He brushed some hair out of your face as Marta returned with your coffee, you both intentionally ignored her.

“You’re the one who said I need to be meaner to the help so,” you shrugged, “This is me being mean.”

“It’s not even that mean. You still manage to be a sweetheart,” he brought your hand up and brushed his lips against them, making your face heat up.

You drank your coffee, hiding your smile behind your mug as she brought in your breakfast - yogurt and fruit for you and toast, bacon, and eggs for Bucky.

“I took the liberty of ordering you a big breakfast, I hope you don’t mind.”

He thanked you, digging in. As soon as Marta shut the door, you snatched a piece of his bacon.

“Hey!” he yelped, angling his plate away from you, “If you wanted bacon, why didn’t you get your own?”

You quickly chewed the piece you pilfered and gave him a wide-eyed look, “Why Brad, you know Angie doesn’t eat bacon.” You tried to take another piece but he smacked your hand away. You laughed and dug into your breakfast, sighing at your lack of bacon, “This is what a lady eats for breakfast,” you rolled your eyes.

Leaning closer he whispered, “I can sneak you some bacon tonight.”

You burst out laughing, “Oh my God, do you have any idea how dirty that sounded?”

He blushed, running his hand through his hair, “Yeah, I heard it as soon as I said it.” He looked away, embarrassed and you stole another piece of bacon.

“I’m going to call a meeting to meet everyone a bit later this morning. You okay with that?”

He nodded, eating his breakfast.

***

You walked together back to the room and you quickly took a shower so you could do your face while Bucky was showering. After getting dressed, you met the staff in the foyer.

Clearing your throat, you introduced yourself and Bucky and explained your expectations for everyone. You wanted to discuss some meal plans with the kitchen staff so you walked with Marta. Turning back you noticed one of the younger girls on staff was hanging around Bucky, trying to catch his attention.

“Marta, who’s that?” you asked, motioning to the girl.

“That’s Ysabelle,” she looked back and frowned at what she saw. “She takes care of the outside of the villa.”

You watched and saw Bucky smiling at her and she stepped into his personal space, tossing her hair. You had an unsettling feeling in your stomach, you couldn’t really place it or name it but you didn’t like it. You stiffened and followed Marta into the kitchen.

***

You met Bucky for lunch on the outdoor patio. When he pulled his chair closer to yours you unconsciously moved yours back. He furrowed his brow but didn’t push. You spread your napkin over your lap and took a sip of your ice water.

“What were you up to this morning?” you asked, trying to keep your voice nonchalant.

“Oh, I spent some time with the gardener on the outside of the villa.”

“Ysabelle?” you practically spat out.

“Yeah,” he nodded, “Ysabelle. Are you okay?”

“Uh huh,” you crossed your legs, putting more distance between the two of you. “Learn anything interesting?”

He leaned back in his chair, “As a matter of fact, yes, I did. We talked about the land here and some of the neighbours might be worth looking into.”

“Well while you were gossiping, I had an interesting morning.”

“Wait. Are you jealous?”

You scoffed. “Me? Jealous? Me?” Shit. Were you jealous? No. “No. Why would I be jealous?”

He just smiled at you.

“Look, you’re supposed to be my boyfriend and it’s embarrassing that you’re flirting with the help.” You could feel your face heat up at how silly you sounded.

“I’m sorry. I wasn’t flirting with her. I just thought we should learn about our neighbours, see if any names were worth looking into. Tell me about your morning.”

“I received a text message from Max.”

Bucky’s nostrils flared imperceptibly. He took a long swallow of his water. “How’d he get your number?”

“That’s what I’d like to know.”

“Did you give it to him?”

“No!” You were surprised at his accusation. “Why would I give him my number?!”

“What did he want?”

“He invited us out to go swimming on the boat. He wants to apologize to you… in person - “

“He wants to see you in a bikini,” he interrupted.

You felt your face heat up, “No he doesn’t.” Taking a moment, you adjusted your hair, “Shit, yeah, he probably does. Yuck.”

“This guy’s persistent,” Bucky paused as Marta brought out lunch, “Thank you,” he said to her, absentmindedly. 

“I took some time to menu plan with Marta this morning. I wanted to make sure we used local resources as much as possible.” Shrugging, you served him some of the brightly coloured salad, explaining, “The tomatoes and basil are grown right here on this land, the bocconcini is made using milk from a local dairy farmer,” you motioned to the plate of various cold cuts, “Marta’s husband makes the prosciutto, capicola, and sopressata himself. You have to try it - it’s to die for. And the bread was made here, fresh this morning.”

He speared a piece of prosciutto and bit back a moan of pleasure, “Oh wow.”

You blinked quickly and gave your head a shake, trying not to stare at him. You were thankful when Marta returned with a bottle of wine and two glasses.

Before she left, Bucky held out his hand, stopping her, “Marta? I have to tell you, this prosciutto is wonderful.”

She smiled at him, “Thank you, sir. I will let my husband know.”

When Marta left, Bucky poured you both a glass of wine, it complemented the lunch perfectly.

Swirling his wine, Bucky turned to you, “So, when are we supposed to go to the boat?” He took a long swallow and you watched him. He cleared his throat. When you looked up, you noticed he was smirking at you and you rolled your eyes at him.

“This afternoon,” you replied, grabbing your water to take a long gulp. Unfortunately for you, you missed your mouth completely and ended up splashing water down the front of your face, neck, and shirt, “Ah, shit,” you complained, quickly grabbing your napkin to clean yourself up. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Bucky watch as you patted at the water, his jaw tense.

He sighed, “Let’s get it over with then,” he muttered, going back to his lunch.

TAGS (strike throughs can’t be tagged for some reason)

@bionic-buckyb @allofthesearetakendafuq @mewsiex @flightofthefantasies @emilyevanston  @buckyywiththegoodhair @beccaanne814-blog @avengerofyourheart @thewife101  @lilasiannerd @brittanymcsharry @misshyen @callmebucky-doll @learisa @avenger-nerd-mom @soymikael @justreadingfics @brighterlights @papi-chulo-bucky @always-an-evans-addict @owhatshername1 @imma-fcking–nerd @thatawkwardtinyperson @hoodgirl163 @iarnasoldat @melconnor2007 @hellomissmabel  @feelmyroarrrr @ria132love @jurassicbarnes @booksb4boys69 @patzammit

@sebstanthemanxo @earinafae  @langinator @50shadesofyes @zofty15 @veronicalei @justareader @almondbuttercups @ek823 @huntermichelle  @lbouvet @joshuad-n @ladylizzieofdarbyshire @elyza-jeanette  @imissyoualittlemoreeveryday @hollycornish @lovingllamareview  @cassandras-musings @secondstartotheright-imagines @canumoveyourseatup-no @chipilerendi @sgtbxckybxrnes

Some thoughts on fandom passive consumption

I’ve made posts about this before before - as in, before Watercast, etc because it’s not a recent issue. But in light of all the anon and non-anon hate i’m gettign here and on ttwitter, i just want to quickly clarify and then leave the issue at rest. 

Summary: there are 2 issues being conflated. Me being upset at declining feedback for watercast (personal and fic specific; worry about pacing being bad etc) VERSUS me saying people should comment more on fics in general, using watercast’s stats as an example of how even a relatively popular fic has the same very low rate of comments (mine peaked at around 5% one chapter, but usually sits around 2-3%).

I’m using watercast as an example there because it’s my most well received thing. And so i’m saying “look, even my best thing is really not that actively responded to, i think as community of readers and writers we should try be more active, engage more and comment more to encourage people because fic consumption isn’t as quick or rebloggable as art

Accusations and rebuttals (these are not straw men, i have screen shots if anyone is concerned about me being fake):

  • Stop flaunting your popularity: That’s really not the point of using watercast stats. as i said the point was to show that i ahve the same rate as everyone else, or barely higher, and use that as hard data driven example. also i’m not a popular author. i have 1 relatively popular fic. 
  • You’re entitled because you’re complaining whilst being popular: this is the conflation i’m talking about, and perhaps it was a bit confusing in my original post. i’m incredibly grateful for the readership i do have for everyone who comments or sends me an anon message - that’s literally why all my chapters keep getting longer and longer because i really really want to make you guys happy and make the chapter update worth it for you. I cannot stress this enough!!!! i love you guys wtf you literally helped me finish law school.  AT THE SAME TIME i still think passive-consumption is an issue which is why i mentioned it. 
  • You’re entitled because you keep asking for comments: i’m sharing this huge thing for free. id on’t think desiring some feedback and comments (and being anxious about them) is that unreasonable so as to constitute being “entitled”. Further, stow the hypocrisy. You’re entitled if you thin you can go around policing what people say on their personal blogs.
  • No one forced you to share for free, just put it behind a patreon then: fandom is a gift economy. no one is forcing anyone to do anything. that’s not the point here. you guys are saying i’m entitled for wanting more feedback. I’m saying, since the thing is free, i don’t think feedback is unreasonable to want. Notice no one is forcing anyone to give feedback here. (also this logic reminds me of the whole “if you don’t want things reposted, don’t share it for free then”! Coincidence?). 
  • write for yourself - stop guilt tripping people: again, two issues. Of course we should try write for ourselves and not be too affected by reception. But again i dont’ think i'ts “excessive” to the point of being “entitled” to want some feedback for time and effort in a context of love. 
  • You are toxic and post miserable depressing shit: please learn how to mute, block, unfollow. 
  • You don’t take criticism (the above), i’m tring to give you advice to help you,  you’re defensive, you attack me!! let’s be honest - i do not think any of you anons or peopel on twitter are trying to “help” me. Don’t even joke - with your gifs and aggressive shit. that’s fine - but don’t even try to get on that moral high horse now lol. I’m not sure how i’m attacking anyone but a rebuttal / response is necessarily a defence. So saying i’m “defensive” isn’t really an argument. That’s like standing up in court and saying that a defendant is being defensive. Well. Yeah. Further, i can disagree with criticism. I think i’ll try to not put sad messages and shit in update posts to avoid sounding like i’m “guilting” people but that’s about where my agreement with you guys end. 

If i’ve missed anything i’ll add to this. but i’ve spent my evening dealing with illogical angry reblogs and anons and DMs instead of writing fic so. I guess i lost that one lol. 

4

Y’all wanna know some shit about thumbcramps? Legit made a joke about defeating as her top enemy when I found out she had blocked me + her dating sim failed. Not that big right? Just making jokes. But that post blew up somehow and thumbcramps over here somehow took notice, and she hunted down the specific post I made about dragging her, proceeded to try and one-up me, and legit deleted the tweet after I dished it right back to her in the quickest backpedal I’ve seen in my life

The last two days have been me learning so much dirt about her, like how badly she treated the staff during the development of Two Scoops and apprantly some 4Chan user dropping $7,000 dollars on the game as a joke near the end of its funding period just to stick it to her and I don’t think I’ve been part of a more surreal drama in my life

Let’s be real about Robert stans

I love how the antis love to come on as anon (no fucking guts to show yourselves) and tell me how I am up Robert’s ass blah blah blah, I excuse his horrible behavior blah blah blah, I don’t point out what’s wrong with him blah blah blah. 

Listen here, son. 

I am not you. I don’t pretend my favorite character isn’t a mess.

 I don’t know ONE FUCKING ROBERT STAN that doesn’t say a 100 times a day what a fucking mess he is. We lovingly call him OUR TRASH SON. THAT IS WHAT WE SAY WITH LOVE. I don’t pretend that he hasn’t done some horrible shit in his past because yes, god he has. I don’t pretend that his being an asshole isn’t something he still has to work on. I DON’T PRETEND that he doesn’t have serious emotional and mental problems. THAT HE DOESN’T HAVE INTERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA. That he doesn’t makes stupid, huge mistakes that cost him a lot. That he accidentally killed someone he once loved and covered it up. That he has such deep fucking issues, his first thought was to always get people out of his way by any means necessary. 

I WELCOME THAT WITH OPEN ARMS. I GET THAT. I UNDERSTAND THAT. 

BUT UNLIKE YOU TERRIBLE ANTIS I don’t pretend that that is all he is. 

I see the good he has done. I don’t turn a blind eye at how much he has given of himself to someone who he will probably never measure up to. I know and see how much he loves his sisters, Diane, Aaron. HOW FUCKING HARD HE IS TRYING. I don’t forget that he watched his mother die at 14 and to this day carries that around him, that his brother did that, that his father beat the shit out of him for being bi, that he was chucked out of town for choosing to save said brother over someone else and getting punished for it. That all that shit closed Robert down so much I’m surprised he even actually functions. 

Regardless, he is a grown man and he needs to figure out how to deal with all that shit in order to let go of all his learned behavior. I root for him every day to get his head together. I watch him fight instincts that he has lived with always to try and be a better person. I DON’T IGNORE THAT HE IS A BETTER PERSON BECAUSE IT SUITS MY POV LIKE SOME. I DON’T IGNORE THAT HE CAN BE THE WORST. 

So hate him all you want. That’s your right to. But don’t roll up in here and tell me I don’t see my favorite character clearly. I don’t EXCUSE the shit he does. I UNDERSTAND IT. And when I think people have wronged him I fucking say it. 

Because listen carefully to be a Robert Sugden fan is a hard fucking job and no one does it without knowing what they are getting into.

So please. Get the fuck off my lawn and leave me to love my wrecked, messed up asshat of a character.

cornfused?

so like how come people keep saying

“i don’t support game grumps but i like ddadds” ?

if it’s about jontron, uh he hasnt been on game grumps since like 2012

and like “well they made a shitty joke 2 years ago!!!” 

well uh right NOW they are trying to be as inclusive as they can and they’re trying to learn how to be more open and courteous of other people’s identities and they give a lot of their time to fans and to help with charities and support artists and creators

no one can be 100% pure and perfect

and there’s some shit here and there i don’t like about the game grumps but you can be critical of something and still enjoy it??

i’ve been watching game grumps since nearly it’s debut and yeah, they said some not so good shit… but they’re trying now to be the best they can

so like…… what’s shitty about game grumps and their effort to support the endeavors of their coworkers

the walking dead starters ( s7ep7 - part two.)

!!! SPOILER ALERT !!! FOR THOSE WHO HASN’T WATCHED THIS EPISODE YET !!!

  • “ i want to get to know you a little better, ___”
  • “ work it out. you’re smart.”
  • “ you’re smart enough to know that i’m not gonna let this slide.”
  • “ ahh, i can’t – i can’t do it.”
  • “ it’s like talking to a birthday present. you gotta take that crap off. i want to see what grandma got me.”
  • “ do you really want to piss me off?”
  • “ christ! that is disgusting. no wonder you cover that up.”
  • “ have you seen it? i mean, have you looked in a mirror? that is gross as hell.”
  • “ i want to touch it. oh, come on. can i touch it?”
  • “ damn. holy hell, kid. look, i… i just… it’s easy to forget that you’re… just a kid.”
  • “ i didn’t mean to hurt your feelings or anything. i… i was just screwing around.”
  • “ just forget it.”
  • “ seriously? i NEVER do that.”
  • “ i guess a kid firing a machine gun is a little bit of a distraction.”
  • “ all jokes aside, you look rad as hell.”
  • “ i wouldn’t cover that shit up.”
  • “ i swear to you, NO ONE is gonna screw with you looking like that. no, sir.”
  • “ were you gentle? were you kind?”
  • “ i’m just screwing around, man!”
  • “ get the hell out.”
  • “ now, you see? that’s what i’m talking about. men breaking each other’s balls.”
  • “ what do you like to do for fun?”
  • “ i want you to sing me a song.”
  • “ i want something in return for that.”
  • “ do not let me distract you.”
  • “ weird, huh?”
  • “ damn. dead, huh?”
  • “ you see it happen?”
  • “ i shot him/her. before it could…”
  • “ damn, no wonder you’re a little serial killer in the making.”
  • “ that was an example of breaking balls, by the way.”
  • “ hold that for me.”
  • “ what’s about to happen is gonna be hard to watch.”
  • “ i don’t want to do it.”
  • “ i wish i could just ignore the rules and let it slide, but i CAN’T.”
  • “ rules are what make it all work.”
  • “ i know it’s not easy.”
  • “ if you try to skirt it, if you try to cut that corner, then it is the iron for you.”
  • “ on your feet.”
  • “ ah, that wasn’t so bad, now, was it?”
  • “ clean that up.”
  • “ i’m all done, do your thing.”
  • “ well, the pussy passed out.”
  • “ it’s settled, we’re square. everything is cool.”
  • “ i hope we all learned something today, because i don’t EVER want to have to do that again.”
  • “ some crazy shit, huh? you probably think i’m a lunatic.”
  • “ come on. let’s go figure out what to do with you.”
  • “ i didn’t want to come back here.”
  • “ i’m not trying to definitively stop ya. just maybe slow your roll.”
  • “ i’m not waiting.”
  • “ that’s just being stupid.”
  • “ you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.”
  • “ it doesn’t matter if you’re stealthy, snipey, gun or knifey. they have the numbers.”
  • “ someone has to pay the price. even if you’re willing… from all we’ve seen, it’s not a lock you’ll be the one.”
  • “ will the man who killed the man who saved our lives die?”
  • “ you’re not talking me out of this, ___!”
  • “ you owe me, and you owe ___”
  • “ if there’s a price, i’ll pay it. but don’t you tell me no.”
  • “ you don’t know anything, you don’t DO anything.”
  • “ you’re a coward. and you’re weak.”
  • “ for once, do something useful.”
  • “ don’t beat yourself up.”
  • “ you sold ‘em out, right? you had to.”
  • “ it’s not what happened.”
  • “ whatever helps you sleep at night.”
  • “ how do YOU sleep at night?”
  • “ you should go. someone’s going to see us.”
  • “ no, you absolutely cannot.”
  • “ why the hell not?”
  • “ look at this badass.”
  • “ you can’t because i’m not done with you.”
  • “ what? you got something to say?”
  • “ why haven’t you killed me?”
  • “ you see, s/he thinks s/he’s holding it together, but you saw it.”
  • “ you on the other hand… we shall see.”
  • “ it’s more productive to break you. more fun, too. you thinking that’s stupid?”
  • “ i’m thinking we’re different.”
  • “ what do you think i should do? you know i can’t let you go.”
  • “ so, do i kill you? iron your face? chop off your arm? tell me. what do you think?”
  • “ i think you should jump out the window to save me the trouble of killing you.”
  • “ now, there is the ___ that impressed the hell outta me.”
  • “ i think you’re not saying what you’re gonna do to me, because you’re not going to do anything.”
  • “ if you knew us, if you knew anything, you WOULD kill us.”
  • “ maybe you’re right. maybe i can’t.”
  • “ let’s go for a ride.”
  • “ if you do anything to him/her…”
  • “ what next? you want my shoes?”
  • “ great, great, great, great, great, GREAT!”
  • “ dooooon’t care ~”
  • “ cool. i’ll wait.”
  • “ we’re practically starving here.”
  • “ starving? you? by ‘practically’ you mean ‘not really.’ ”
  • “ REALLY? you people seriously don’t have a sense of humor.”
  • “ excuse me. what’s your name again?”
  • “ i am sorry for having been so rude to you just now.”
  • “ it looks like i’m gonna be here for a while.”
  • “ if you’d like, i think it would be enjoyable to screw your brains out.”
  • “ i mean, y’know, if you’re agreeable to it.”
  • “ i am about 50% more into you now. just sayin’.”
  • “ all right, well, i’m just gonna put my feet up and wait for my stuff to get here.”
  • “ would you be a lamb and make us a little lemonade?”
  • “ now, i know i left you some of that good powdered stuff.”
  • “ take me on the grand tour!”
  • “ how ‘bout this one?”
  • “ are you serious, ___? come on.”
  • “ oh-ho, my… look at this little angel.”
  • “ i’m sorry for what i said.”
  • “ i reject that.”
  • “ you meant it, you felt it, that’s your truth.”
  • “ i’d like to take it back to awkward silence now.”
  • “ find what you wanted?”
  • “ hey, neighbor. why don’t you come by later? we might grill out.”
  • “ oh, i like it here. i just might have to stay here.”
  • “ you know, i was thinking about what you said earlier, ___. maybe it IS stupid keeping you alive.”
  • “ i mean, why am i trying so hard?”
  • “ maybe i should just bury you in one of those flower beds? huh?”
  • “ what do you think about that?”
{fic} Locked Up

Rating:  G (no warnings)
Relationship:  Feyre/Rhysand/Lucien (Feyrhycien)
Word Count:  1,983

Here on AO3.

Summary:  

In which Rhys steals things, Tamlin’s a dick, and Feyre and Lucien make out. Complete self-indulgent fluff.

__________________

“Rhysand, I am going to kill you,” Lucien hissed into the phone receiver.

“I said I was sorry, didn’t I?” Rhys said, not sounding very sorry at all. “Listen, I’ll pay your bail as soon as I can. Relax. Everything will be fine. I got this.”

“You’d better. You hear me, Rhys? You’d better get me the fuck out of –” Lucien swore violently as the phone went dead. “Fine!” he snapped at it, knowing Rhys couldn’t hear him anymore. “Be an asshole! Let me rot in here! See if I care!” And he slammed the receiver back into its cradle.

Stupid old-fashioned phone. Stupid hick jail. Stupid boyfriend who didn’t bother to let him know his fancy car was stolen.

“Done in there?” It was the sheriff – his name badge said Tom Lint – watching Lucien’s every move. Even more hick than this hick town, with his blond hair and his belligerent attitude and his blustering, as if he’d punch Lucien’s lights out if he set so much as a toe out of line.

“Guess so,” Lucien snarled, storming past the sheriff and into the holding cell himself. In retaliation, the sheriff slammed the door so hard that Lucien fell backwards. Then Sheriff Lint stalked off in a huff.

“Whoa. Careful, there.” Lucien yelped as someone caught him before he could hit the concrete floor and set him on his feet.

“And who are you?” he sniped, brushing dust off his sleeves.

“The name’s Feyre.” Lucien turned around to face a young woman with a spattering of freckles, brown hair coming free from a braid, and a frown. Her arms were crossed tightly across her chest. “And you might say thanks.”

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anonymous asked:

Hello. I saw in an answer you did that you think Jumin got screwed over in the secret ends. Would you mind explaining why you think that? I'm just curious.

Hello sweet Nonnykins. Please, take a seat next to me and let us sip our whiskey (or your drink of preference) and talk about how Jumin got screwed over. I know a lot of this has been discussed in other posts by other bloggers so I hope I’m not repeating things already beat into the ground. I’d like to preference this with a couple things right out the back. Also this got way longer than expected, as usual, so under the cut it goes!

Keep reading

kala-wolfgang-trash prompted:

“Ok i was imagining kalagang in paris and kala was like cooking a meal for wolfie and he wasnt used to this and also she was trying to learn how to cook german meals for him and its just a fluffy mess with them being happy in paris and everything”

First of all, happy birthday my dear!  I hope you had an amazing day.  Now, I suck at cooking and know nothing about German food except stereotypes and such, so all food talk here comes from some Google searching.  If anyone who knows how to cook and/or knows anything about German food sees something I got wrong, please correct me! (Also holy shit I would never drink black coffee, but it’s my headcanon that that’s how Wolfgang takes his coffee so accept it.)  Takes place in a vague Whispersless future because Paris is the Kalagang happy place, okay?

When Wolfgang wakes that morning, he finds that he is alone in the bed.  For a moment, panic floods through him.  But then he smells something delicious coming from the little kitchenette in his and Kala’s Parisian hotel room, and he remembers that they are safe.  Wolfgang rolls outs of bed and puts on a pair of boxers, then gets up to see what Kala is making.

Kala is already fully dressed for the day, clearly having been up for a bit.  She stands over a skillet, cooking several sausages attentively. Wolfgang slides up behind her and puts his hands on her hips, pulling himself close to her.

“Mm, smells delicious,” he says.  Then he pauses a moment.  “What’s the occasion?”

She turns her head to plant a quick peck on his cheek.  “No occasion. We’ve made so many of my father’s recipes, I wanted to try to make something that was German for once.”

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anonymous asked:

In the art/photograph exhibition one is talking to an attractive stranger and expressing his honest, not always flattering, views of the works. Stranger turns out to be the artist.

Patriot

This sucked.  Not only had Nat dragged him to Steve’s gallery opening, she’d ditched him for Bucky. The two of them were walking around, enjoying themselves and talking about the art with Steve.  Alright, maybe ditched was a little harsh.  Clint was the one who’d decided to be anti-social and wander the quieter areas of the gallery, alone with his beer.  He hated galleries; full of pretentious people, artsy-fartsy types with their noses in the air and no clue what the real world was like.  

Right now he was trying to figure out what the hell he was looking at.  It was a series of photos but damned if he could tell what it was supposed to be.  A bunch of blurry colored circles on a black background and it was supposed to be patriotic?  Ridiculous and completely stupid, fucking waste of space.    

“I wouldn’t call it a waste of space considering it really isn’t taking any up.”

Clint froze.  He slowly turned towards the speaker, both eyes wide open and horrified at being overheard.  The man standing to his left had a wry smile on his face.  He was a little older than Clint, thinning dark hair, light eyes, dressed like he worked at the gallery.  Great, he was going to end up kicked out and having to hang out on the sidewalk waiting for Nat to finish up.  Well, if he was going to get the boot by some art snob, he’d at least tell him what he thought about this so-called art.  

“These pictures make no sense.  They’re just a bunch of blurry, colored circles on a black background.  It’s ridiculous.  I’m guessing these things are over-priced at hundreds of dollars for something that a toddler could do better!”  Clint gestured at the display.  “And why name the series ‘Patriot’?  There’s not anything patriotic in any of these except the colors!  Whoever took these is some no talent hack ripping people off.”  He crossed his arms across his chest and glared at Gallery Guy.

“Let me guess, girlfriend dragged you to the art show or on a first date trying to impress?”  Gallery Guy raised an eyebrow as he spoke, daring Clint to prove him wrong.

Clint blinked.  That was not the reaction he was expecting.  “Uh, friend having art show and guilting a group of us to come for support actually.”  

Gallery Guy’s other eyebrow rose, joining the first.  Guess he did not see that coming at all, Clint thought, feeling a bit vindicated at proving he wasn’t some asshole trying to get laid.  “Look, cut me some slack.  I got bored and decided to look around.  It’s not like anyone is taking the time to explain this shit to me.”  

Here Be The Break

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anonymous asked:

Re: vibes -- I get pretty cool Loki feels from you. By that I mean, a pointed irreverence undergirded by careful conscientiousness and general fuck-all approach to getting through the day.

Awh, I’m flattered! I’m still very much a work in progress, but I try very hard to learn and follow Loki’s example.

These are some of the “Lokean Laws” (”Laws” is used for alliteration.) I’ve come up with to consider and that have helped in my day to day: 

  • Don’t talk shit unless you document.
  • Find a partner who would hold a bowl for you, literally or metaphorically. If someone wouldn’t stay if you had a C-Bag, don’t put their name on the lease. If you’ve no desire for a someone, work on trying to hold your own bowl/feeling worth a bowl sometimes. [Insert weed jokes and childish giggling here.]
  • You don’t have to be nice to be kind. 
  •  Ask yourself “why is this funny?” Make your coping mechanism sit on the couch.
  • You will sometimes be wrong. And yes, it will be humiliating and uncomfortable. But you’ll know better how to handle it next time. Open your ears and shut your mouth. 
  • Open it again when you see someone making the same mistakes you have. Maybe choreograph a “told you so” dance. Make things out of spite to combat hate and learn new skills.
  • Be open to change, but not easily molded. 
  • If an advert is “looking for a good team player”, what it usually means is “someone who won’t snitch”.
  • Anecdotal evidence is bad marketing. New Agers rarely understand Quantum Mechanics. 
  • All idols decay.
  • Getting people to argue about semantics is a good tactic if you want to sneak a dastardly plot by. Would you fight for your identity?
  • You don’t have to always talk to people. Or hug them. 
  • Sometimes you have to lie. 
  • The next sentence is the truth.
  • The sentence above this one is a lie.
  • Make homemade gifts. Good and practical ones. Or give cash.