signs that you’re trapped in an unhealthy RP relationship:
you develop fear of shipping with other muses.
you develop fear of shipping with duplicates of your rp partner’s muse
you notice your circle of acquaintances is growing smaller and smaller because your partner wants to be your ‘one and only’
you feel pressured to roleplay certain plots/scenarios that make you uncomfortable or uncertain
your partner ‘guilt trips’ you when you don’t comply with their demands (ooc or ic).
you feel obligated to login at certain times during the day, otherwise your possessive partner will get pissed.
your partner shows possessiveness by causing their character to be extremely clingy to your character
they shower you with compliments ( aka. ‘what would i do without you?’. ‘you’re my everything!’) in an effort to keep you dedicated and devoted to them until the end of time
at the slightest offense they’ll vague-post about you, ignore you, or make rude/passive-aggressive comments at you.
I have fallen into many a toxic RP relationship, and have successfully escaped them all. It’s not easy, but it’s possible. If you need HELP, advice, or even a listening ear, please feel free to message me. <3
why you should stop calling people your FPs: the shortest guide i could write
for those who don’t know, FP means favourive person.
people with certain mental illnesses or even survivors of abuse tend to obsess or cling to people which can result in “imprinting” and idealising of the person. FP is a term widely used on tunglr.hell to describe a person one might “imprint” on.
this concept might seem convenient and it probably perfectly describes your relationship with some people but unfortunately in the long run it will make you and your FP more miserable. here’s why.
1. it forces the other person into a “relationship” without their consent. when you say someone is your favourite person you’re basically giving them a special place in your life. you signify that this specific person has become someone very important. the problem is that the other person often doesn’t even know that your emotional wellbeing is on them now and frankly, putting such responsibility on someone who is absolutely not prepared for this is incredibly harmful for both parties and can lead to a lot of disappointment and drama.
2. it cultivates and normalises posessiveness, idealisation and splitting. even the term “favourite person” sounds as if it is something positive. but let’s be honest there’s nothing good in the fact that we get clingy and posessive and are ready to die for someone who was nice to us like 3 times. yes, we should admit that this is a thing that happens, as a symptom, but we also should never forget that it’s something that is not healthy. those are symptoms and we have to fight them, not slap a cute label and romanticise them. making funny relatable posts about this on tumblr is also a bad idea, you’re perpetuating this kind of behaviour through social media by saying, essentially, “if you’re mentally ill, it’s okay”
3. it can lead to guilt tripping and abuse in a relationship. guys, i know that you feel like your partner or FP should spend all their time with you and i know that you get jealous and miserable when they’re with someone else, but guilt tripping your friends or partners into spending more time with you and forcing them to center their lives around you is not okay. and this is exactly what happens when you decide that someone is your favourite person. you center your life around them and afterwards you feel mistreated when they dont do the same for you. you can blame your partner/friend openly or keep it to yourself, either way when one or both parties are constantly frustrated with each other it’s not a healthy relationship.
TL;DR - while your mental illness definitely influences your relationships with people, you should never build a relationship BASED on its symptoms, and this is exactly what you’re doing when you force someone into being your favourite person. analyse your behaviour and address the issues in your relationships instead of normalising it and to holding other people to an impossible standard of being your favourite person.
A huge amount of MCU fic features Steve Rogers the wonderful, caring, sensitive, supportive boyfriend, and I uh. Kind of want the opposite.
Don’t get me wrong, any “Steve is a godawful boyfriend” headcanon should still start from the baseline of Steve being a good person who cares about Doing The Right Thing and treating people decently. But Steve is also:
- married to his job - kind of emotionally constipated - quick to anger - prickly about receiving comfort, and awkward about giving it - blunt and plain-spoken - prone to expecting a lot of the people around him, and to being openly disappointed/unimpressed when they don’t come through - going to put duty ahead of personal attachments most of the time - withdrawn and socially isolated - reckless, stubborn, and the kind of prideful that answers anything that can be taken as a challenge with “wanna bet?” - a lifelong dweeb who has never been in a romantic relationship and has no experience in how they work
Which is a set of issues that could range anywhere from “highly manageable, if you aren’t afraid to go toe-to-toe with him and don’t expect him to be available 24/7″ to “un-dateable human disaster.” Going by my fairly limited experience with comics, there is precedent for the “un-dateable human disaster” option; MCU doesn’t have to follow it, but it wouldn’t be out of the blue. And let’s face it, MCU Steve could use some better-developed flaws.
And oh my lord, Godawful Boyfriend Steve Rogers. Swears he’s not trying to set a record for number of consecutive dinner dates he’s bailed out of halfway through to go Avenging. Fails epically at normal emotional boundaries–is cagey and withdrawn about the weirdest shit, but overshares about his Dead Best Friend Feelings on the first date. Goes abruptly from zero to full commitment once he decides he’s found the Right Partner. Guilt-trips like a pro, and sometimes forgets how fucking intimidating he is when he’s pissed off.
Takes an “if you get killed, walk it off” approach to almost all life difficulties. Will always come through with material and moral support in an emergency, but clams up and flees rather than be a shoulder to cry on. Wouldn’t know work/life separation if it clocked him over the head.
Don’t get me wrong, Steve’s a nice dude, and unlike most angry repressed masculinity-stereotype characters, he’s capable of being forthright about his feelings when it counts. But there’s plenty of potential there for him to be flat-out fucking terrible at romantic relationships. And even at his best… well, “sensitive” isn’t exactly the word I would use. Considerate, sure. Solicitous of whether he’s saying/doing the exact best possible thing for someone else’s emotional wellbeing, not so much.
I have to stop booking things for London. I booked the Harry Potter studio tour *squeee* but now I have no more free days. I am going alone as well, that stresses me a bit but I took an overpriced tour with the bus ride included so it shouldn’t be so bad.
It’s been a while since someone brought up my loves lol
Always wins when they play Trivia Crack
Warren obviously and Nathan hates it so much aw. He always gets pissed and sulky when Warren wins so sometimes Warren lets him win so Nathan can be all smug and happy all day about it.
Laughs when their partner trips on something
Nathan for sure omg Warren trips coming up the steps of the school and Nathan is cracking up while Warren struggles to pick up his things but Warren doesn’t mind because it’s worth it to see Nathan smile.
Would drop ice down the back of the other’s shirt as a joke
I have to say Nathan again probably lol Warren would feel too bad about it later but Nathan is all like “I fucking got you” and Warren just yells something like “What is wrong with you!”
Spoils the ending of books/movies
Warren definitely. He keeps trying to get Nathan to read/watch something for so long that by the time he actually does Warren gets so excited while talking about it with him that he accidentally spoils the ending. Nathan is always pissed when this happens but he still finishes it anyway.
Always posts a picture of the other as their MCM or WCW
NATHANNATHANNATHAN omg he can’t help himself he’s never really had anyone or anything to really call his that he cared about so when monday comes around all his social medias are flooded with pictures of Warren playing video games or doing homework with dumb mcm captions. Warren definitely doesn’t mind all the attention
Eats the last piece of cake in the fridge before the other can have it
Warren lmao he probably doesn’t even think about it he’s just like “damn I really want that cake” and just goes for it, but Nathan doesn’t mind he’s not a big fan of sweets imo
Obnoxiously celebrates Monday Punday every week
Is this even a question. Obviously Warren is the pun master lmao. While Nathan is flooding everyone with pictures of Warren Warren is out here wearing his pun shirts and making shitty puns every 5 seconds
Makes loving hack posts on the other’s Facebook/Instagram/Tumblr/Twitter etc
Both I think. Nathan would be the type to be all “hacked bitch keep an eye on your phone” with like heart emojis or the typical “I’m gay” and tag himself lmao while Warren would be the typical “Hacked! Love you” with kissy emojis lmao
Has to beat their partner in every game
Warren. He doesn’t HAVE to win but depending on the game he almost always does lmao Nathan tries so hard but rarely wins and when he does Warren probably lets him (But Nathan doesn’t know that)
Keeps their partner up half the night talking about random stuff
WARREN DEFINITELY WARREN
Eats too much garlic and tries to kiss their partner anyway
I’m gonna say Warren again Nathan would be like “get off me that’s fucking gross” while Warren is like “But I love you”
Bucky: Almost every time you take a glance at him in the passenger seat, his mouth is hanging open and snores could be heard from a mile away. Luckily you listening to loud music has no effect on your boyfriend’s slumbers. However, when he is awake for the road trips that you’re driving for, Bucky always has a hand on your thigh. He does it more for himself, reminding him that you’re alive and really there with him. When it comes time to switch spots in the car, the both of you have no issue with going to a rest stop and eating a good meal before stuffing yourselves back into the SUV that you stole from Tony. Bucky likes to hold your hand in his while he drives on the long highways, and loves to occasionally bring your knuckles to his lips to place a kiss there.
Steve: The only thing that he truly knew how to drive was a motorcycle, which is why you never had a problem with being the sole driver on road trips. As much as Steve wished he could help take some of the load off the trip, he definitely enjoyed chatting during the whole ride there. Not only that, he loves changing the radio stations and singing along to whatever old music that he recognizes. That man could find anything to talk about, from the recent missions the team had been on, to the birds flying around between the trees as you whizzed by in your car. Those late night cuddles when you finally reached your vacation destination made up for all the driving you did on the way there.
Peter: No one could beat his energy level while he was sitting in the passenger seat of your car for the 6 hour ride to wherever the hell Tony sent you two. It was a paid vacation, and those were the words that happily sent you flying to your car. For some reason, Peter had an extremely hard time staying still and being content in the car. So it was damn near impossible to get through one hour of driving before having to stop at a gas station to let him use the bathroom and get snacks. Plus, he didn’t have his license from growing up in the city, so he couldn’t help out with any of the driving. But Peter’s cute face, and utter charm can always warm your heart, even on cold nights of driving.
Thor: Despite the fact that he can literally astral project anywhere on the planet, or even in the universe, road trips are his favorite thing. Just the time spent hanging out with you, talking about little things from both of your pasts is enough love for Thor. The joke amongst the group whenever the two of you embark on a trip is, “Big man, little car.” One of the first times you went on a roadtrip with Thor, he had to squeeze into your tiny honda for over 8 hours in massive traffic. So even though sometimes plans get a little crazy with him being a god, the two of you wouldn’t have it any other way.
T'challa: He was very apprehensive about road trips, mostly because he’d rather spend all the time it took driving from destination to destination actually being in said destination. T’challa didn’t get the appeal of being trapped in a metal box on wheels for an extended period of time. But, since you adored the road trip memories from your childhood, T’challa gladly got into the car with you as you drove around the country. He made it known that he valued your adoration of traveling, and he loved doing what you enjoyed. T'challa cared about you more than anything in the world. So he settled with simply being a passenger while you drove across Wakanda in a sleek sportscar, the best and safest one that money could possibly buy.
Clint: Roadtrips with Clint quickly became your favorite part of the relationship. He took it upon himself to rent a volkswagen bus every time, just for the hell of it and made sure to equip it with anything you both could possibly need. Blankets, snacks, drinks, extra clothes, extra shoes, money, you name it, Clint had it. After all, Tony usually sponsored these outings since the both of you under the same roof as Tony made him a little nervous. So obtaining so much stuff wasn’t a problem anyway. While Clint would drive, you would be a spectacular copilot, providing an equally spectacular playlist to accompany the trip. It was stacked with bops of the century and cute love songs that you would duet.
Bruce: You wouldn’t think that bruce would be a desirable road trip partner, considering how uncomfortable small spaces make him. But in all reality, Bruce is an amazing road trip copilot. He makes himself at home in the passenger seat, quietly google mapsing your route and holding hour long conversations. Not only that, but he brings his own set of pillows for when it’s time to nap. (Which is pretty cute) Bruce would have everything planned out, even down to what restaurants you eat at during your rest stop breaks. So, when you finally arrive at the various places you were staying, it was nice to know you already had reservations for dinner and your hotel.
I would rather this be anonymous cause I don’t wish for extra attention or drama on my blog. I decided to send this in as experience and signs to other young viewers
I’m currently 15 years old and I began watching Greg at age 14. The only time I had heard of him was that he was a “controversial” youtuber. I decided to start watching him to see if it really was bad.
I found his content funny (I’m talking UhOhBro) with him reacting to game characters and situations like that. I dug deeper and watched a large portion, if not, all videos of him from 2014-2016. They were somewhat addictive.
Around this time, I got more defensive in nature. When it came to topics like bullying, vegetarians, veganism, weight, etc, I would immediately jump up to speak about my opinion. It was as if I was projecting his words to others. My friends noticed this and immediately told me to calm down.
I got less heated thanks to them, but I felt wrong. Why had I reacted like that?
I now know because I thought he was right. He warped my sense of reason. I stopped watching him when the Dan Howell and Eugenia Cooney shit started.
I thought myself as mature and smart but I still fell into his grasp. This sounds weird, I’m aware.
I don’t have an abuse story, he has never directly talked to me or threatened me. But somehow, I was manipulated and that’s what fucks me up now.
He manipulates his viewers, plays on their weaknesses by pretending to help and traps you in a circle of believing everything he says.
Everyone who is an Onision stan is trapped in this circle like I was or simply is as fucked up as him.
That whole series of him reacting to your favorite songs was a way to rub up to fans and flatter them, same way he would speak highly of Andy and other singers or youtubers.
He stirred up the phandom with Dan and Phil videos, stirred up Jack and Mark fans, is stirring up Felix’s fans.
He stirred up Andy/BVB fans the same way. The Supernatural/Destiel shit? That too. This is all from the top of my head so I’m probably missing more.
He’s a massive manipulator, to his loved ones, and to his fans.
Hope his content dies out.
I think what I like about this submission so much is the fact that it’s so routine (and I mean this in the best way possible): it’s not a story about an abusive partner or friend using Onision videos to guilt trip their partner; it’s a story about the small and insidious ways in which he has affected somebody’s day to day life because of the existence of his videos. And that’s almost more scary of a concept than some of the more blatant abuse that his videos have taken a part in.
Seriously! Let’s go someplace. Gonna be travelling around the US come october, or maybe sooner if I can find someone to go with. Had plans to go to NY w/a friend but that didn’t work out so I’m still looking. If there’s: anywhere you wanna go anything you wanna do want to go trekking through forests/parks/ people free places
Do lots of camping Go wwoofing/helpx/workaway Hangout w/friends in other states shoot me a message.