trina decker*

And it’s released! The latest chapter of 1976 is now available for your reading pleasure. Take a seat, readers. The angst is coming. ;)

AO3 || FFN

I’m working on Touch & See next! It’s day 2 of my three day writing retreat, and I’m responding to Asks and messages LIVE with real-time updates, so please feel free to shoot me an Ask, make a request, or just say hello! Keep me company while I work on your next fave! ;)  ♥

For the anti’s that say Lana Parrilla can’t act

Watch Teresa Ortiz talking about her mother’s death

Watch Sarah Gavin being tortured endlessly 

Watch Trina Decker tell Susan that she’s ‘a little more complex than that’

Watch Trina Decker tell Janet that she’s pregnant

Watch Trina Decker tell her husband that she’s pregnant and might want to keep the baby

Watch Nina Shaefer with her children 

Watch Nina Shaefer grapple with her feelings for another man

Watch Nellie Kendall discover that her husband is having the one thing she’s desperate for with another woman 

Watch Eva Zambrano tell a good man’s friends that he just died unexpectedly having been fine all day 

Watch Eva Zambrano give a young girl the hope of a future despite her upbringing

Watch Eva Zambrano comforting a little girl whose whole family could die

Watch Regina Mills period.

8

“Wish I had a mother like you.”
“I doubt that.”
“No, really. How do you do it?”
“Oh, you just do. You just love them. You want to spare them everything, take every bullet, but…”
“…but how can they learn if you don’t let them make their own mistakes?”
“Exactly.”

Watch on regina-mxlls.tumblr.com

a looping video of lana speaking spanish ..

you’re welcome 👌

Signed, Sealed, Delivered

A/N: Part of the OQ Advent Calendar. A bit of an emotional rollercoaster. Thanks for everyone who encouraged me through this process including @outlawqueenbey, @starscythe, @brookeap3, @the-alpha-incipiens, @trina-deckers  (who titled this fic for me) and especially @repellomuggletum15, who beta-ed this like a champ and was there to help me through the writer crazies. I am so lucky to have you all as friends. Merry Christmas to all you OQers out there. May your holiday season be bright and full of cheer, and may this year be kinder to us than the last. :)


“Regina, we’re begging you to at least consider it.” Mary Margaret’s hand grips the mug of coffee (no, tea, she ordered tea at a coffee stop), her other hand nervously tapping on the veneer of the table.Emma’s knee is bobbing, she can see it from the other side of the table the way it shakes, almost vibrating with the discomfort of the moment. Her mouth is tense and tight, her eyes wandering the room, feigning interest in the holiday decorations that adorn the coffee shop, looking everywhere but at Regina.Coward.Regina should have known this coffee date would turn into an ambush. After all, Mary Margaret and Emma are her friends but they are also Robin’s sisters (Mary Margaret is only a half sister, but she’s a sister nonetheless). Sometimes Regina thinks her and Robin’s separation and pending divorce is harder on them than it is on her.She should have known better than to fall in love with her best friend’s brother. It’s wonderful in many ways, for your best friend to literally become family, but she lost the ability to complain and bitch about her love life with Emma the day her love life included Robin.

“After Thanksgiving, I cannot believe you two are asking this of me,” Regina muttered, picking up her coffee and taking a sip in one brisk action. The coffee is hot, too hot, and she’s sipped too much, but she refuses to wince as the steaming liquid scorches her tongue and throat.

She’s good at concealing pain, after all.

“He was a mess then, and he’s assured me it won’t happen again. I won’t let him touch a drop of alcohol. Not even rum cake!” Mary Margaret is frantic now, desperately trying to make this sound less like the miserable idea it actually is. “You love Christmas with us. And Roland wants to spend Christmas with Henry so badly, he’s asked us all.”

“It’s a tradition, Regina,” Emma says nearly above a whisper, “it’s one we want to keep.”

Emma looks uncomfortable with this setup (it had to be Mary Margaret’s idea), but it’s clear that she wants this, too.

“So why can’t we spend Christmas together without Robin? Why can’t he just have Christmas with his dad?” She asks pointedly at Mary Margaret, “I assume Ava doesn’t want Robert around, and I’m sure that side of the family has a grand old time.”

“Let’s leave our dad out of it.” Emma looks up from her cup of coffee, angrily, “You know how Robin and I feel about him.”

“Well from what I can gather, Robin is now turning into him, and…”

“Regina!” Mary Margaret admonishes, “I get it. He had too much to drink on Thanksgiving. But that does not make him Robert. It was one day. And it was a hard day. A hard day for you both.”

“And yet I managed to have a perfectly wonderful meal with Emma and Neal without swallowing a fifth of whiskey.” Regina is quick to remind.

The pain of that day is still there, and it hurts. Sometimes people forget she hurts, too. She’s resilient, guarded, and private. But that day, to those who knew her, she was a mess of emotions. It was the anniversary of the death of her marriage.

Robin had begged to have Roland for the holiday dinner. Regina offered the day up easily, texting him that he could have Thanksgiving and the Friday afterwards in exchange for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Robin wouldn’t agree to the deal, of course, and they were at a bit of a standstill until Emma had mentioned the idea of splitting Roland.

“We’re going to celebrate with Neal’s family. You’re welcome, Regina. And they eat early. Like, 2 PM? We can have a Thanksgiving meal, Henry and Roland will have time together, and…well, you know Neal’s father loves you. And then just drop off Roland at Mary Margaret and David’s, and boom! Henry gets double the Thanksgiving fun and won’t miss out on anything. It’s simple, and easy. What do you think?”

It seemed like a great solution to this whole mess.

But of course, when the day came, Regina was a wreck, because dropping Roland off meant she would have to see Robin for the first time in forever. It should not have been that way, not for them. They were best friends turned lovers, and in ten years prior to this separation they had barely gone more than a day without at least hearing each other’s voice

Regina was the first to withdraw. After Thanksgiving, her stubbornness kicked in, and she shut him out completely. Refused to speak to him about anything besides Roland, refused to even hear his attempts to reconcile. And then, on Christmas Eve, there was a simple text from Robin, telling her that he knew she didn’t want to hear from him, but he would always love her. She had misinterpreted, thought he meant that he still loves her that way, and drove back from her mother’s, intent on choking on her pride and begging him to come home to her.

But by the time she’d come back, by the time she’d tried to get him back, it was too late. He had already moved on, into the arms of his ex-girlfriend. The image of him and Marian will probably burn fresh and painfully in her mind forever.

From that moment, she shut down any hope of reuniting and focused on trying to get over him. And she figured if she spent enough time away from him, that would happen. Eventually.

So she set her best efforts in seeing him as little as possible. Sure, they shared custody of Roland. But they have a system, and it involves dropping him off at daycare on the day of the week they are set to make the exchange, while the other picks him up and takes him home for the remainder of the week, until the next exchange. Thanksgiving was the first time they would see each other, since the week Mrs. Lucas went on vacation and shut down the daycare, leaving them without their usual routine.

When they lost daycare, they split the responsibility of Roland 50/50 and suddenly, after months of avoiding one another, they had to see each other on a daily basis, breathe the same air, stare into each other’s eyes…it was, difficult. She’s never been good at setting boundaries with Robin, she’s weak for him, and all that time away had done nothing to change that. That week they ended up becoming much too flirty for her own taste. Before she knew it they were sharing dinners every night, and even spent all of the Fourth of July together. They didn’t talk about anything too serious, not in front of Roland, of course. But it had been wonderful, having him for that brief time. But it was over when Roland’s daycare opened back up and she was alone again. All that week had left her with was a deep hole in her heart, and time spent thinking too much about him, reopening wounds and making her long to relive a chapter in her life she knew was closed.

After that, she told herself she would not fall under Robin’s spell again. So she drew back as far as she could, stopped taking phone calls and continued to talk in texts and emails. Robin pushed a little, at first. But she shot down every attempt to meet and talk, with one excuse or another, and Robin had eventually relented. This was the new normal.

She had been dreading Thanksgiving for quite some time, considering that last year’s Thanksgiving had been the worst day of her life. Where a familiar argument took a wrong turn and words were spoken that could never be taken back, screams and cries and demands and ultimatums put them at a standstill, and then Robin slammed a door to their home that he never opened again. At least, not in that way.

So she had dreaded Thanksgiving, yes, but she would be lying if the prospect of seeing Robin after months had not excited her just a bit. He wasn’t just her soon-to-be-ex-husband, after all. For the last ten years he had been her person, her best friend, the one she trusted the most, and of course there was this unparalleled chemistry they shared, the passion they had was unlike anything she’d ever experienced in her life.

So as much as she knew better, as much as she knew she was opening herself to heartache all over again, she’d found herself fretting over the perfect Thanksgiving outfit, spending a bit longer on her makeup…wondering if he would look at her the way he used to…despite the fact that he had moved on, she knew he had. Still, she hoped for something that couldn’t be, and it was ridiculous, wasn’t it?

She found out how ridiculous it was when she got to Mary Margaret’s house to drop off Roland.

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