treats for chickens

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Odin got a very rare treat this week silky chicken eggs!

exo as the types of people you see at the gym

xiumin: 

• very serious about the gym

• has two drink bottles: protein shake in one and water in the other

• sweats very easily and a lot 

• everyone admires him, he’s a favourite at the gym

• makes burpees look easy

• coaches others sometimes

CrossFitter

suho: 

• wears the top brands of sportswear

• squats for days

• gives encouragement to everyone around him

• starts a conversation each time he’s on the treadmill with the person next to him

• tried lifting more than he was capable to, got stuck under the bar. Very embarrassed when two other people had to help him out.

• enjoys the steam room

• muscles are always very sore the next day (always overdoes it)

yixing: 

• forgot his earphones 

• forgot his towels

• helps spot for other people

• irritated when people don’t put the equipment back in its original place

• assists the new gym members in using the equipment

• cleans up the area he used to its original appearance before leaving

checks himself out in the change room mirror

chanyeol:

• tank top, shorts + 1L water bottle

• focuses more on weights than anything else

• forgets leg day

• hogs the weights by exercising in front of the weight rack

• dropped a dumbbell on his foot

• grunts + yells when lifting weights or doing pull ups

• does bicep curls in front of a mirror. Counts out loud

baekhyun: 

• reluctant to come to the gym

• but he doesn’t want to waste his gym membership that he spent money on

• places a muffin in the water bottle holder on the running machines

• spends more time on his phone whilst he hogs a machine

• social butterfly

• uses equipment, doesn’t put it back properly

• once he breaks a sweat, he’s done. Flexes and takes a photo for instagram before he leaves. #sunsoutgunsout  #nopainnogain #newyearnewme

chen:

• arrives to the gym with his squad

• multiple workout playlists ready on his phone that’s on his armband

• sings as he workouts 

• makes pull ups look easy

• starts dancing on the treadmill sometimes

• fell once when he accidentally increased the speed of the treadmill too much

• takes a picture with his friends before leaving the gym #squadgoals

kyungsoo:

• does his own thing, very quiet and minds his own business

• shy about his body, wears long sleeved t shirts plus trackies

• overheats when working out. Takes many breaks to cool down

• prefers pilates + yoga

• interested in trying new equipment/machines. Too shy to ask how

• gets flustered when people compliment him and gives him encouragements

• thanks all the trainers before leaving

kai:

• “can my dogs come into the gym? it’s hot outside”

• shows up wearing jeans???

• attends many zumba classes

• became an assistant coach for his zumba classes

• lays down for a rest between each workout. falls asleep sometimes

• most of his exercise comes from walking/running with his dogs to the gym 

• “I exercised today, I will treat myself”. Eats 30 chicken nuggets at KFC

sehun:

• didn’t come at his own will, he accompanies his friends as a gym buddy

• distracts his friends by mocking them and taking selfies with them for his snapchat/instagram story

• plays with the equipment/machines since he doesn’t know how to use them

• secretly judges everyone at the gym. checks out the girls though

• brought snacks to eat 

• on his phone for most of the time, occasionally gives encouragement to his buddies

• banned from two gyms in town already

You know, now that Scanlan and Kaylie are on the road this is a great time to sneak them in as a cameo into a d&d campaign…

Your party meets two gnomes travelling on the road, one of which has an expensive-looking rapier at his side. He introduces himself (this is always a fake name, get creative).

Your party hits it off with them and they offer to share a campsite for the night. Your party agrees and begins to set up bedrolls when the gnome laughs and says “No no, friends, we’ll camp in style tonight, my treat.” and summons a glowing purple portal leading to a beautifully-adorned mansion.

He treats the party to dinner (chicken, of course) but states that there’s only the two bedrooms, but your party can camp in the foyer.

In the morning you part ways, wondering who the strange gnomes were. They’re certainly more powerful than they looked.

2

Im sobbing in every language known  to man

Jimin - Ride It (M)

Originally posted by wonhoslilmonster

((^^ Gif not mine btw))

Word Count - 1,196
Warnings - Nothing but sin. Thigh riding. Daddy kink. Swearing. Spanking. Please forgive me.
Synopsis - Jimin comes home early from practice one day, sweaty, hair a mess… Your thoughts get a little race-y, and despite your efforts to hide it, he catches on to what you want pretty quick.

——————————

It was times like this you wanted to shrivel up and die.

Jimin was your boyfriend of a solid year and a half now-despite the struggles of dating someone with his hectic schedule and busy lifestyle, honestly, you wouldn’t trade it for anything.

But sometimes, sometimes you… Would trade it for anything. This was one of those times.

“Jagiyaaa~! I’m home a little early!” Jimin came happily walking into your shared apartment, looking simply overjoyed to be there, and to see you.

But he also looked… Sweaty. And messy.

His hair was messed up, as if he’d just gotten out of bed, sweat made his bangs cling to forehead, his skin was still practically glowing with energy from what you assumed was a long day of dance practice.

And god damnit, he was wearing shorts, on top of everything.

You’d never admit it, never in your life, but… Hot damn, your boyfriend had some banging thighs.

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t imagine riding them all the time, hands on his shoulders to brace yourself, shuddering as he whispered sinful nothings into your ear-

“Earth to Y/N??” Jimin waved his hand in front of your dazed face, giggling at your spacey-ness. “I asked you how your day’s been, silly girl.”

“I-it’s been great, Minnie.” You nodded, forcing a convincing smile and trying your hardest not to let your eyes linger on his thighs as he sat beside you on the couch.

“Is everything okay, jagi? You seem flustered,” He pouted a little at you, reaching over and brushing a few stray strands of hair out of your face. Given the close proximity, you could feel the heat radiating from him as he withdrew his hand from your face and, unforunately, laid it on your thigh, patting it gently.

“Y-yeah, I’m okay!” You nodded affirmatively, though you… Couldn’t. Quite come up with a reason as to why you looked flustered in the first place.

“If you say so,” He raised an inquisitive eyebrow at you, leaving his hand where it was on your thigh, his fingers beginning to absently trace little patterns over the clothed skin.

Damnit, he’s on to you.

“I-I missed you today, Minnie-how was dance practice?” You shifted the subject away from the state of your well-being, knowing if you let him dwell on it he’d catch in to what was going on inside your head.

“Oh, it was great! We had a lot of fun today-Yoongi-hyung treated everybody to chicken and pizza for lunch, and our manager said since we’ve been working so hard lately, we can have tomorrow off! Isn’t that wonderful, jagiya?” Jimin, as you’d expect, was elated at the thought of a day off.

But there was a glint in his eyes you didn’t like.

“We can spend the whole day together tomorrow, how great will that be? Think of all the things we could do,”

Yikes. You understood now.

You’d been not-so-inconspicuously squeezing your thighs together, you realized, and… Yeah, you did sort of keep looking down at his thighs while was talking…

He caught on quicker than you anticipated.

“Spacing out again, baby girl?” He chuckled, shaking his head at you and turning your face towards his with his index finger, looking at you with mock sympathy.

“Poor little kitten… Did you think I wouldn’t notice you admiring my thighs like that? Be a little less obvious next time.” He was wearing a smirk the Cheshire Cat would envy, looking at you as if you were the prey to his predator.

And, let’s be real… You were.

“Stand up and take everything off.” He let go of your face, nodding at you and sitting back against the couch with an expectant look on his face.

You quickly moved to do as he said-honestly, if there was a record for fastest strip time, you’d have just broken it.

“Aww, so eager today, aren’t we?” He abruptly pulled you down onto his lap once you were naked, situating you so you straddled his thigh.

He looked… So smug, and pleased. He must have been thinking about this, too.

“You know, I was planning on asking you if you wanted to try this tomorrow… But thanks to your slutty attitude, I guess it can’t wait, can it?” He cocked his head at you, smirking at how… Small you seemed. How submissive you seemed. It delighted him.

“Daddy asked you a question, kitten. Answer me.” His hand slithered up your leg before slapping your ass, of course leaving a mark. He was good at that, spanking you.

“N-no Daddy, it can’t wait,” You squeaked out an answer, desperate to get this over with so you could… Ride his damn thigh already lord have mercy.

He chuckled at you, taking your hands and placing them on his shoulders.

“What are you waiting for, slut? Get going.”

You didn’t need to be told twice.

You immediately started rocking yourself on his thigh, not even slightly embarrassed as you saw his skin begin to glisten from the sheer wetness of your cunt. He seemed to enjoy it too, once he saw it.

“That’s it, good girl. Ride Daddy’s thigh. Damnit, look how wet you are-how long have you wanted to do this? You should have said something sooner.” He reached behind you, grabbing a fistful of your hair and yanking it back, causing a surprised groan to rumble up from your throat. He latched his mouth onto the expanse of your neck, immediately biting down and starting to pepper red-purple marks across your skin, while your hips worked frantically against his thigh of their own will and volition.

“Fuck,” Jimin pulled away from your neck, groaning as he saw the marks he’d left. “I hope you don’t think this is all we’ll be doing tonight, you little slut. I’m goona pound you so hard into the bed we’ll have to buy a new one,” With his free hand, he delivered several hard spanks to your already red ass.

The spanks just made you that much closer, in all honesty.

You were reduced to nothing short of a moaning, borderline screaming mess as you desperately rocked yourself on his thigh. “D-Daddy, Daddy, please-please make me cum, please,”

He just chuckled at you, and shook his head. “Work for it, you little whore.”

But what he did after he said that contradicted his words.

He wedged his hand between your pussy and his thigh, rubbing furiously at your clit and even pinching it.

“Daddy, I can’t-I can’t hold it if you do th-that-” “-Cum for me, then, slut. Do it. Cum all over Daddy’s thigh.”

Once again… You didn’t need to be told twice.

Your whole body shook, and you screamed, your back arching as your cunt fluttered and coated Jimin’s thigh in your cum.

You slumped against his chest, panting, while he let go of your hair and started tracing patterns all over your now slightly sweaty back.

“Go ahead and take a breather, princess. Wouldn’t want you passing out on me or anything when we really get started.”

Yikes, you were in for a long night. Not to mention the next day.

Sleepy Skyping (Seungcheol)

Request:

Hey!! Could I request a scenario where you’re in a long distance relationship with Seungcheol and on the rare times you skype due to your busy schedules, you both struggle to stay awake and one watches the other sleep? Thank you and I really love your blog ahhh!!!


Being in a long-distance relationship with Seungcheol had, in all honesty, proven out to be easier than you had feared, as you both managed to keep in touch regularly and clearly thought about each other a lot. The only downside you could name was the rare Skype calls, which you would’ve loved to have more of, but that only made you treasure each and every call all the more.

That evening, you were a bit sad to notice that you were yawning before even managing to press the button to video call Seungcheol. It had been a month since your last Skype call, and now that you finally got to have one, you were so tired that you knew you’d fall asleep if you kept your eyes shut for a second too long.

It was unfair.

Within a few seconds, you saw your computer’s screen be filled with what you loved the most - your boyfriend, wearing an oversized hoodie and a wide smile on his face. A smile spread to your lips in an instant, too, and your heart felt full with love, although it also ached because you would’ve done anything to be able to hug and cuddle him. Your voice was almost dreamy when you spoke. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Seungcheol said with a lazy yet happy smile, and yawned right after. You snorted.

“Tired?” you asked, although it was fairly obvious, and he nodded.

“We’ve been practicing nonstop,” he said, his voice groggy as though he had just woken up, which you could easily tell he hadn’t, “which means… two or three hours of sleep a night.”

Your heart sank a little, and your lips formed an involuntary pout. “Will you be okay? How do you even live on that little sleep?”

“I’ll be fine, we’ve got a few days off coming up,” he said with a smile, but it was a slightly pained one. Sighing, he opened his eyes up a bit better and looked at you warmly, taking in your features that he had only been able to adore in photos lately. “I’ve really missed you, baby. How are things for you?”

“I’ve missed you, too,” you mumbled, fiddling with your fingers, and bit back a yawn. Seungcheol snorted and commented on how funny you looked, and you chuckled while rolling your eyes. “But I’m fine, there’s just been so much to do, so many events to attend, things to study, people to meet… Sometimes I feel like I should be in two places at once.”

“I get that,” Seungcheol said, and you watched him lean down better, which was when you realized he was on his bed. He was now resting his cheek on his arms that were crossed in front of him. “If I was there, I could do half of the things you need to do.”

Chuckling softly, you shook your head and leaned your head into your hand, your elbow resting on your desk. “If only. How would you excuse your absence?”

“I’m sure I’d find a look-a-like or something,” he snorted jokingly and let his eyes fall shut for a moment.

You smiled fondly, although your heart felt on the heavier side, so full of longing that it almost hurt while also bursting with love you felt for the man showing on your computer screen. “If you want to sleep, we can end the call, you know.”

Seungcheol’s eyes shot open in an instant, and he hurried to shake his head. “No way, we haven’t gotten to Skype in ages.”

“I know, but…” you began, but he cut you off and insisted on continuing. Sighing, you looked at his tired features; as much as you wanted to continue the call, too, you could tell he needed the sleep, and you were starting to feel drowsy as well. “Alright. So, how are your knees?”

“They’re better,” Seungcheol smiled, glad that you remembered, and you couldn’t help but smile, too: he was just that cute. “I promised to treat Soonyoung for some fried chicken if he made the choreography so that I don’t need to get on my knees, and he came through.”

You snorted: of course there was food involved. “That’s good. But still, be careful while dancing, I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“Oh, look at you worrying about me,” Seungcheol laughed teasingly and cooed when you tried to defend yourself. “But really, I will. I’ll send you proof shots every now and then, yeah?”

“Sure,” you smiled and yawned, allowing your eyes to fall shut for a moment. The corners of Seungcheol’s mouth tugged upwards as he looked at you, and a big part of him wished he could be there with you. Soon you opened your eyes, your smile widening a little. “I really don’t want to read reports about you twisting your ankle or hurting your knee again, you know.”

“I’ll be careful,” he grinned and got a bit cozier with his oversized hoodie, the hood of which he had on. Yawning, he shifted a little into a more comfortable position, too. “Then again, if I get hurt, I guess you could come take care of me.”

“Please, you’d just make all the Carats worried,” you said softly and amusedly noted how Seungcheol’s facial features were starting to relax. A soft yawn left your lips again, and you leaned down on your desk.

“At least I’d have you here,” he mumbled, his voice so faint that you could barely hear it. “It’s all I want.”

Your gaze softened even more when you noticed that he was finally starting to fall asleep, and your heart felt full with love at the realization. As much as you would’ve loved to continue talking, there was something incredibly precious about seeing him asleep, especially considering the fact that you were in a long-distance relationship. It was a sight you probably wouldn’t see again for a long, long time, and also one that you hadn’t seen before.

For a good while, you just sat there with a small yet happy smile on your face as you watched Seungcheol sleep. You could tell he needed it, and it made your heart feel all nice and warm to see how adorable he looked while sleeping, his plump lips a bit pouty and facial features relaxed altogether. You were unable to hold in a quiet snort when you saw him scrunch his nose a little while sleeping.

If only you could’ve been there to pet his hair and sleep next to him, everything would’ve been perfect.

“Good night, Seungcheol,” you whispered happily and crossed your arms on your desk before allowing your head to rest on top of them.

Since you couldn’t physically sleep next to each other, sleeping together through a Skype call would do, especially since you got to wake up to Seungcheol calling your name and laughing at the long duration of the call.

You decided that one day you’d actually get to wake up next to him.


Admin Scooter

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Being the lowest in the pecking order, Martha is happy to get an extra treat on the bench.. her nemesis Tess won’t let her eat in peace most of the time.. Tess is a mean little hen.. #chickensofinstagram #backyardchickens #chickensaspets #petchickens #chickens #hen #henstagram #treats #marthathemixedhen (hier: Münster)

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jroseley  asked:

I wish you would right a fic where Peeta is spoiling buttercup and Katniss tries to put a stop to it .

I like this prompt, @jroseley​!! It was fun to write. Hope you enjoy! The title is a phrase my Mom used to use instead of saying that she bribed us to get us to behave. ;-) RATED T+


Positive Reinforcements

“Last thing we need to discuss is Buttercup’s weight,” Dr. Tigris says as she levels me with a serious look.

“What about his weight?” I ask.

“He’s gained almost a pound and a half. That isn’t good for his age.” For a moment, I stare at her, confused. I’ve kept him strictly on his diet and don’t understand how he’s gained weight unless…

“Peeta,” I mutter under my breath and Dr. Tigris peels off her gloves to dispose of them.

Keep reading

Dutch chickens have been sprayed with the anti lice stuff “fypronil”. This makes their eggs dangerous for human consumption and even though no one has gotten sick yet, and even though it would take only a few weeks for the chickens to recover and have their eggs be eaten again, the government decided to kill about 3 million chickens.

Now we don’t call it killing in Dutch. We say “ruimen” or “opruimen”, which means “cleaning up”.

You don’t clean up 3 million chickens, friend. You murder them because they don’t pay you enough.