Big K.R.I.T.

One of the all around best talents of the current crop of hip hop artists. He is an intelligent southern gentleman with serious skills. Producing, writing, freestyling, he literally does it all; and has proven supreme skill at it all over and over again on all the above bodies of work. 

Big KRIT possesses wisdom and talent usually not attained at such a young age. Get into if you haven’t. Any of the above would be a great place to start.





Trap Crunk Trapstyle
Trap —  Digitally Imported Premium

I remember listening/viewing “ DJ Cotts’ —  Hardstyle Mix ” a couple of years back. ;-) And then … This happened!

Showtek - FTS (SAY MY NAME Remix)

This is what I love, and can’t stop loving.
Get wasted at parties, from 9 ‘till 7 in the morning.
I live for the music, rolling blunts, feeling high, getting loaded or take some pills and go to La La Land.
Spending all my money on dope and extreme high priced tickets.
But in the end it’s all worth it.
I like to live in my own world.
Fuck regular life, fuck a 9 to 5 job!
I’m told to enjoy every moment, every hour, every minute!
That’s what I do on Fridays and Saturday.
Why should I take life so seriously?
I just wanna do what I like to do!!
Being far from reality, cause I can’t stand society!
This is my own world, I just wanna hear the music.
I think the whole system fucking sucks!
Everybody’s working their fucking ass off during the week.
Getting totally fucking stressed out.
So what’s wrong, and what’s right?
I live for the weekend, I live for hard styles, I live for hardstyle baby!

I’ve been hooked ever since … ♥


Now I'm REALLY fucked...

So today it was hot in my therapists office. I thought she was helping me, I’ve been seeing this one for over a year now I think. But, I should have been more wary in the beginning, when she told me she had no experience working with trans people. I should have known…

I left there today when she went to get copies of something. I walked out and left her behind, because it seems she was taking my opinions personally, like it was some type of social call, and she was interrupting me rudely and acting as if I had no right to speak. I was like, well wait….what am I paying you for if I can’t speak? I believe she is fairly new to social work etc and had no idea how to control her self. I was under the impression that I was able to vent and speak and let out my feelings in a truly passionate manner. But apparently, not with her. 

So now it looks like I’ll have to find yet another therapist. There’s nobody to talk to here, no trans people, no family, and no friends that are even willing to ask me how I am doing, let alone let me talk about my feelings.

I’m truly stuck in a horrendous mid-transition stage, and I don’t know which way to go. Sometimes I want to keep doing the HRT, other times…like now, I just feel totally exhausted by this whole situation in my mind and I want to stop HRT and get TRT to rebalance my mind to match my body. Sometimes I feel like I was supposed to be a girl, other times I feel like that feeling is just a culmination of all the abuse and abandonment I’ve felt throughout my life, not having a father, never being taught things by a loving mother and father, etc. It seems like I missed out on and lack some of the most ESSENTIAL things to a child and childhood. 

It would be great if I had one person around here, just one person who would ask me how I feel. But everyone’s too busy with themselves. Nobody wants to talk about “weird” shit like Gender Dysphoria and being transgender. Nobody asks, because nobody cares…


Kid Cudi

The many faces of Cudi. This guy is an artist. I know you’re like ‘well duh.’ But no, really, Cudi is an artist; not just a rapper but an artist like Kanye or Pharrell. He uses his emotions to create art whether it be empowering or revealing, deep or superficial, he makes things people can relate to and bond over. Even if they only bond with his presence through the track I would argue Kid Cudi has prevented as many suicides and violent outbursts as any cop or hotline. His art allows people to feel vulnerable to not only the world but to themselves. Man on the Moon and every album since has been able to take a listener through the thick forest of their subconscious and emerge on the other side stronger, fitter, happier for the experience. In fact, that’s it! His work is art because it gives you an experience. Not just a listen, but an experience. Similar to that of Pink Floyd or Outkast. That’s some impressive company.

….Of course even Cudi admits this is all easier to embrace if you partake in the Green. Burn Baby Burn.