so while I will begrudgingly admit that I enjoyed Cars 3, I also kept getting taken out of it because of how many fucking questions the Cars universe raises
there’s this character that’s a school bus.. like… a normal human school bus… Not a school bus designed to transport other cars, like Mack or the helicopter from the first movie, but like… designed to carry humans inside of her?? she even references the school district she’s from?? if she was from a car school wouldn’t she be designed to carry cars not people?? is the Cars universe a post-apocalyptic nightmare world where sentient cars wiped out the humans or what??
there’s one part where Lightning McQueen fixes something by taping it back together offscreen and I’m like?? how?? you don’t have hands???
Cruz comments that something is high quality and made out of real metal but isn’t that sort of like something being made out of human skin or bones or something
a lot of the movie is about how Lightning feels inferior to the newer younger cars, but… where are they coming from?? do the cars procreate? do they just… build new cars? who is building these new cars?? and if they’re being built why can’t Lightning just get some newer parts to help him compete??
there are child cars, so… how do they get older? are their parents replacing their parts every year? are they somehow growing organically?? does it have to do with whatever horrific event wiped out humanity?
there’s a part where lightning gets all four of his wheels removed and isn’t that sort of gruesome?? aren’t those like, his legs? and wait so every time he gets a pitstop he’s getting his legs ripped off and replaced with new ones?????
why the fuck do touchscreens exist in the Cars universe THEY DON’T HAVE HANDS
why do the cars have tongues and teeth if they run on gas
all the girl cars have car eyeliner ~so you can tell that they’re girls~ but how the hell do they apply it WITH NO HANDS
if there are car billionaires, then there is car money. who is on the car money? are there car presidents? is one of them Gerald Ford? where do cars keep their car money? in their trunks? do they have car wallets? but if they keep their wallets in their trunks isn’t that like keeping your wallet in your buttcrack all the time?
Sally implies that Lightning McQueen is smelly after being a shut-in for months… so… the cars can sweat? they have sweat glands? is there car deodorant or do they just go to car washes? where would they put the car deodorant? are their wheel wells their armpits? how do they put on car deodorant WITHOUT HANDS
there’s a scene where a forklift plays a guitar and I just
“317 years after human kind’s extinction, the OUREA reaches her final destination, the planet Aion. Loaded with the genetic samples and the memory of a billion people and the equipment to build a new world. Theia the artificial intelligence has the task to rebuild human society…“
Pidge: Ok, so don’t get too
excited, but I’ve worked out a way to connect the laptop to the internet… Lance: Pidge how the quiznak did you think I was not going to get excited about this?!?!?! Hunk: Anything I can help with? Pidge: Ok, so the thing is that
from our end it’s pretty simple right, I mean it’s just a case of sending and
receiving correctly coded signals, and my laptop has the inbuilt hardware for
all that. The real problem is that we’re light years away, and even with the
ship’s range, it’d take years for our signal to reach Earth, and we can’t use the speed-enhanced Altean frequencies because it has to fit in with the existing architecture, and then coming back there isn’t enough range anyway and- Keith: Pidge, breathe Pidge: …Anyway, if we had a way
to transport the signals instantly we could simply relay them back and forth
through, say, a wormhole specifically designed to transport waves rather than
matter? Hunk: But the only way to do that
is if…. Pidge: … yeah Shiro: Lance: Keith: Shiro: I can’t believe you’re
seriously debating asking the princess to use her Altean energy so the castle
can get a wifi signal Shiro: *leaves* Other paladins: *ashamed shuffling* Five minutes later Shiro, running back into the
room: SHE SAID YES!!
A while ago, I had the idea to create posters promoting different locations featured in the series as if they were sights accessible by public transport. The posters’ aesthetic is inspired by vintage advertising designed for Transport for London or British railroad companies.
So far, 24 motifs are done. I’m still fiddling with details, so these are wips still. More to follow soon using the #sherlock tfl tag.