Unpopular Opinion Time!
You can hate the person that had been a misogynist towards you.
You can hate the person that had been homophobic towards you.
You can hate the person that had been misandrist towards you.
You can hate the person that had been transphobic towards you.
You can hate the person that had been cisphobic towards you.
You can hate the person that had been racist towards you.
You can hate the person that had been physically/mentally abusive towards you.
That singular incident does not give you a right or a reason to hate every
person that falls into that demographic or group of people. That
singular incident does not give you a reason to brand all
[white/black/hispanic/trans/gay/lesbian/straight/etc] people the same as
the person who had hurt you.
A black woman gets raped by a Hispanic man. Obviously this is very traumatic, obviously this is going to cause some issues with comfort towards Hispanic people, because it was a traumatic event. Proper ways to handle this?: Therapy, support groups, etc. Realizing and understanding that this Hispanic person does not represent all Hispanic men.
A woman attacks a transwoman in the bathroom. It is highly understandable the reasoning why said transwoman would find it within herself that all women are like that, because of the violence that trans individuals are subject to because of a lack of understanding in society. However, to brand all women as horrible because of that incident isn’t healthy for you. Proper way to handle this?: Therapy, support groups, etc. Realizing and understanding that one person does not blanket over the entire population.
A heterosexual man was molested by a gay man during his childhood. It is highly understandable the reasoning why said heterosexual man would be nervous around gay men. Trauma during childhood sticks with someone in the most awful of ways. It takes a bit more to recover from, but therapy and support groups that openly discuss the differences between a group of people and said attacker are wonderful for helping a survivor through any prejudices they have. Realizing and understanding that not all gay men are are child molesters.
If you are hating an entire group and using your personal experiences as a foundation, that is toxic, not only for you, but for the innocent people being dragged through the mud by your hatred. I am truly sorry the things that you have went through, I know personally how hard and agonizing the road to recovery can be. But don’t wallow in your ‘victimhood’ and allow it to justify your viewpoint of an entire group of people. Help yourself get better and healthy.
Homophobia, Transphobia, Cisphobia, sexism, and racism are never okay, and you should never have to justify it with ‘well this happened to me and it hurt and I hate all -insert group of people here- now because of it.’