im never aware of how inappropriate my facial expressions are until im discussing horrible shit with someone & they ask ‘why are you smiling?’ like ive committed actual murder

romidant-diarmi  asked:

Since it's on it's way: imagine having to explain April Fool's Day and/or the concept of pranking one's friends for the sake of amusement. Like, maybe the aliens understand setting something up in regards to honing reflexes or something, but things like whoopee cushions and complex Rube Goldberg machines to fling shaving cream at someone just baffle them. Also the concept of a prank war in space is just amusing.

Thrnawxh watched in confusion as Human Frankie attached some sort of transparent film to the entryway, snickering to themself and occasionally looking over their shoulder as if fearing they were being watched. It put Thrnawxh ‘on edge’ as the humans would say.

In xir experience, if a human was worried, anyone else ought to be terrified.

Eventually, xir worry won out, causing xem to ask what Human Frankie was doing.

“It’s the first day of April.” Human Frankie said, baring their teeth in a show of either aggression, or bizarrely enough pleasure. Usually Thrnawxh would be able to guess which one it was based on a human’s statement, but this one made no sense.

“Also known as April Fool’s day, and oh boy does Sara got something coming for her.” Frankie continued, apparently having no idea that xe didn’t understand their explanation. What’s worse was that Human Sara apparently had something hunting them.

“And this device will stop Human Sara’s would-be attackers?” Xe asked, not sure how that would work, but xe had seen humans accomplish much more demanding things with seemingly worse odds.

“No, no what I meant is that Sara doesn’t-” they began before pausing, seemingly to reconsider whatever they were going to say. “You remember when I explained human humour to you, right?”

“Yes, when I believed you were ill because of your stomach contracting while you looked at an oddly shaped root vegetable.”  Thrnawxh confirmed, not seeing the relevance.

“Great. So this is a joke. I’m going to play a prank on Sara, because it’s April’s Fool’s day.” They said, though some of the words didn’t seem to translate well or at all to xir native language.

“I do not understand,” xe said, looking up at them in a way xe hoped Human Frankie would realise was questioning. Xir hopes were however not high.

“Shit, right okay. Erm. So a prank is a trick - you know what a trick is, right? Good. It’s a trick that you pull on someone because it’s funny, or like today, because it’s tradition. Sometimes they’re mean, but unless you’re a dickhead, they’re just funny. Like… shoving a pie in someone’s face, or pulling cellophane across the doorway and having them walk into it. Just, harmless fun, you know? And April Fool’s day is the first day of April - that’s one of our months; one of the sub-parts we divide the time it takes for our home planet to orbit the sun into. So it’s the first day of that sub-part, and it’s tradition to prank people.” Human Frankie explained, giving a small nod when they were done as if confirming what they’d just said.

“Why?” Xe asked, getting only a shrug in return - a signal of uncertainty or non-commitment. “What purpose does it serve?”

“Oh, no no purpose. I mean, maybe it did at one time? Superstition or what ever, but it’s just fun.” Human Frankie said before delving into a story of a prank they and a friend did on an authoritarian learning monitor when they were younger.

The story itself was interesting, though Thrnawxh was hardly able to focus when xe had so much new information to process about human behaviour.

Xe certainly had a lot left to learn.


豪德寺_7 by Taiwan’s Riccardo
Via Flickr:
Konica Hexar RF+Leica Summicron-M DR 50/2+Fujifilm RDP III.

Twin Peaks, Linda Evangelista for Jil Sander, 1991

In the early 1980s virtually the only way colour was shown in photographs was to use transparency film, sometimes negative film, but always trying to give a ‘reality to the colours’. I wanted to have the same degree of control over colour as I had control over black and white. Marc Ascoli, the brilliant Italian/Tunisian art director I worked with on Yohji Yamamoto, Jil Sander and Martine Sitbon’s campaigns, challenged me to propose to him a colour image that had the same power as black and white. The answer came when I took transparency film and processed it in developer intended for negative film, the result was a saturated, high contrast colour negative which when printed had very vivid colours. I could only find one lab in the whole of London who was prepared to do this, ( all the rest refused and said it would ruin the chemicals ) the tiny and wonderfully named BDI colour Labs, run by Brian Dowling.
Brian’s skill as a printer is phenomenal, as was his patience working with me, but mostly his endless enthusiasm made for some of the happiest and most rewarding printing of my life. After this BDI became the one place in the world that could create this new colour photography and consequently became the hub of an active and excited fashion photography community. Images for every important brand were later printed there and photographers such as Glen Luchford, David Sims, Corinne Day, Juergen Teller and Craig McDean to name just a few, would all pass through there. This picture of Linda Evangelista and the one of Shalom Harlow are prints that took literally days to master. Long printing sessions into the night to achieve the sort of skin tones that I felt reflected how I imagined the modern world should look. - Nick Knight