traditional marriages

Never chase a Man. If He wants you, He will come and get you.

Men are natural hunters; they go for what they want. If a man wants to be with you, he will pursue you and make you his. If he wants to marry you, he will propose. The right man will never leave you wondering if you are a priority. Men go hard for what they want, if he isn’t going hard for you then you aren’t what he wants. The right man will do everything in his power to keep his woman happy and by his side.

Traditional Celtic marriage vows, better than anything I've ever heard:

You cannot possess me for I belong to myself
But while we both wish it, I give you that which is mine to give
You cannot command me, for I am a free person
But I shall serve you in those ways you require
and the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand.

My country is celebrating 100 years of independence this year and we are also achieving marriage equality on the 1st of March. I can’t think of a better way to celebrate our achievements as a nation than celebrating equality and human rights. Congratulations, Finland, may there be many more victories such as this and may your freedom last a thousand years!

(yes, the Finnish flag appears backwards because she’s waving it around)

So I’m watching The Crown on Netflix, real banger of a show, and Prince Phillip goes “you’ve taken my career and my home and my family name from me what kind of marriage is this” and I was like shit. he’s the woman in a traditional marriage. that’s a completely normal classic marriage, it’s just that the gender roles are reversed. I don’t know if that was intentional from the show writers but DAMN

Juno in Astrology

Juno is an asteroid discovered on September the 1st in 1804, and is situated between Mars and Jupiter, and in astrology, she is slowly finding her place as playing an important role in marriage and long term relationships (10 + years) - Juno is currently being debated in the astrology community as to being the assigned ruler for Libra, while Venus acts as co-ruler.

Venus is what we desire, what we find attractive and how we wish to receive affection and appreciation, while Juno represents long term committed relationships, loyalty and faithfulness in a partnership. It shows what one needs to feel satisfied in love or romance, or what one feels they need to have a successful, satisfying, long-term partnership.

Through the analysis of a collection of synastry charts between couples, a high percentage we’re married (or in a long-term committed relationship with) with someone who fulfilled the needs of their natal Juno placement., usually by having the Sun or Moon in the Juno sign (and/or other placements).

Your Juno sign, house placement and aspects can give an additional layer of information about what you need, desire and are likely to manifest in marriage/long-term relationship.

All descriptions below can be applied both to your potential marriage partner AND yourself and the way you act in a long-term commitment.

(Can read sign for house placement - eg : 4th house Juno, read cancer as well as natal sign).

… 

Juno in Aries:

You may desire a very strong, masculine and direct marriage partner. A partner who can act as a leader, pave their own path and has a strong sense of who they are. You may desire a marriage partner who will fight for you if necessary (and vice versa), and also someone who is independent and can carry out their own goals without relying too much on you to assist them. You may want to be put first in the relationship, though it can sometimes manifest as your partner putting themselves and their concerns before you instead, which is where the need for ones own independence in the relationship can arise. You and/or the marriage partner certainly do not like being told what to do in the relationship. The marriage partner may also have a sense of impatience about them, wanting to get to step 3 before completing 1 and 2, though they most likely wont adhere to advice. If problems do arise in the relationship, they will be upfront and deal with it before quickly moving on.

The marriage partner may prove to be bold and direct, and perhaps may be somewhat harsh and brash at times, and there is a possibility for an aggressive relationship or a marriage where dispute is common, depending on the house placement and aspects Juno receives, especially any harsh aspects from Mars, Saturn or Pluto. Also be aware of the possibility of the marriage partner dominating the relationship (or yourself) and can be quite temperamental, though sudden outbursts can subside quite quickly.

You may in fact not wish to get married, as your desire for independence can make the concept of marriage uncomfortable for you.On the other hand, you may marry simply out of impulsion. This placement can also manifest the possibility of remaining single throughout life.

Your most successful relationship will have a great sense of independence and individuality, whereby both you and your partner are able to do as they please without relying too heavily on the opinion or direction of the other.

Juno in Taurus

You may desire a marriage partner with a stable and consistent income, whereby they are able to financially support you in marriage. They may be incredibly hard workers and be very involved in their own projects. You may desire a relaxed and down to earth partner, who you can spend time with in the comforts of your own home. You may desire a marriage partner with a natural sense of beauty or is naturally attractive. Your marriage partner may be quite sensual and hedonistic, enjoying touching and caressing, and lots of exchange of physical pleasure between the both of you. You especially want peace and tranquility in the relationship, whereby neither of you want to intentionally stir each other. You both may enjoy indulging in good food and other material comforts together, happily lazing around doing very little in each others company. You may also both enjoy spending time in nature or natural settings, and you could potentially both decide to move to a country area together away from the hustle of larger communities (many other chart factors need to be evident for this).

Most of all, you desire a stable and secure marriage that has been built upon reliable foundations. Once you marry, you want to keep it that way. You may strongly disagree with divorce, and if that ever became a possibility, you (or your partner) would do everything in their personal power to avoid that situation. You want the comfort in security and stability of marriage.

If afflicted, there is possibility of the partner being over materialistic, caring too much about your income and what you buy, and therefore being rather restrictive and cheap when it comes to buying things. You may also choose to marry someone simply for the sake of financial security, especially if you’re struggling materially on your own. The marriage partner may be quite stubborn and set in their ways, to the point where their mannerisms and routines becomes highly predictable

Ultimately you desire a grounded and reliable marriage partnership where the security of knowing your partner will stay with you, and also having the security of material resources between you and your partner.

Juno in Gemini

With this placement you may desire an intellectual marriage partner who has fantastic communication skills, often engaging in daily conversation whether through phone calls, emails, texts and speaking face to face together. You may marry someone who keeps in constant contact with you, often telling you where they are and what they are doing if always from you (often in the local town or at work). Your marriage partner may be quite witty, humorous and have a youthful expression and personality, or may in fact be younger than you. The may love to socialise and get amongst the local community setting, which may mean they often travel back and forth from home quite frequently. You may have met the marriage partner through an online dating service or another social media platform. They may have also been a neighbour or simply someone from your local town where you grew up.

With Juno in Gemini, there’s also possibilities of having one more marriage in your life.

If afflicted, you or the marriage partner may have cheated within the relationship which ultimately causes a separation and a re-marriage to someone else. They may also be unpredictable and unreliable when it comes to promises and deadlines you give them. They may say they’ll do something, though it ends up falling through. Gemini has no particular intent on keeping to a certain path, so there still is a possibility with this placement not to be married at all. The marriage partner may often have unpredictable mood swings, based on their rationality of things, therefore needing clear communication of things in order for them to avoid episodes of anxiety.

Ultimately what you desire in a long-term relationship is variety, communication, someone who is intellectual and social, and can keep the relationship fresh and interesting.

Juno in Cancer

You may desire marriage to establish strong family foundations. You may want a marriage partner who is gentle, sensitive and caring, and can easily get on well with members of your family and particularly your mother (or mother figure). You desire a marriage partner who can commit and provide a sense of emotional security, who also tends to stay at home and/or takes care of the home. They may also enjoy cooking for you, and you for them. Your marriage partner may be emotionally intuitive and sensitive, and enjoys staying close to your side, offering physical affection whenever possible. They may be quite protective of you, and will defend you in times of need. You may marry due to your family traditions, and/or wish to continue the family tradition (yours or theirs) after marriage, continuing activities you or your partner experienced during their childhood. The marriage partner may also wish to start a family, and you or the partner may strongly wish to become a parent after marriage.

If afflicted, you or the marriage partner may be quite moody and/or clingy, making it hard for independence in the marriage. They may be emotional vulnerable, and desire you to ‘mother’ them in the relationship, rather than act like a traditional marriage partner. They can also be quite clingy and smothering, never really allowing you your own independent need for space. Their sentimentality about things past in the relationship may be brought up, and they may become quite emotional and cranky if you were to forget an anniversary.

Ultimately what you desire in a marriage partner is loyalty, openness and sympathy, emotional connection, care, security and perhaps to start your own family and to continue family traditions.

Juno in Leo

You may desire a bold, expressive and charismatic partner. You want the marriage partner to make you feel special in the relationship, and be quite romantic and affectionate, never forgetting to remind you how much they love you, spoiling you with surprises and courteous gestures and tokens of appreciation. They may have a very strong and dignified personality, and you can find charismatic leadership ability quite attractive. Your marriage partner may be quite playful and humorous, extruding a sunny disposition and approaching the marriage with a copious amount of energy and enthusiasm. You want to be able to take pride in your partner, not being afraid to show them off and express how closely bonded you are to them. You want to be able to share a spotlight with your partner where you feel like you are the only two in the world. You desire to experience warmth and generosity in the marriage throughout your time spent together.

If Juno is afflicted, or especially if aspected by Jupiter with this placement, you may experience the marriage partner to be overwhelming, and trying to outshine you in the marriage as the one who tends to ‘call the shots’ as to  where you’re going, what you two will do together and when. This sense of bossiness can be quite unsettling, and their sense of pride may get in the way of them expressing affection to you in public or in front of friends and/or family. At times, they may over-dramatically react to situations in the relationship, causing unnecessary drama for the sake of causing drama. They may also become quite jealous and defensive over you.

What you desire in a long term committed relationship is ultimately consistent love, affection and appreciation, even if that means them simply saying “I love you” every now and again, fun and playfulness, generosity, excitement, and above all, loyalty.

Juno in Virgo

With this placement, you may desire a long-term relationship with someone who is practical, observant, orderly and has strong work ethic. You may wish to be committed to someone who has a selfless and giving nature, who enjoys helping you with daily tasks and taking care of the home life. You may attract a rather modest partner, who doesn’t indulge too much in extravagant romantic gestures, but expresses their love and affection through being of help to you in anyway you ask or need. They may take great time and care in getting to know you down to the finest detail so that they can apply themselves to doing things the exact way you like it to make you happy (example, taking note exactly what your favourite hot beverage is and making it exactly how you like it). They may clean and take the initiative to help you order and structure your daily routine and if required, help you with work. The partner may also be a diligent worker themselves, applying themselves to their own job and providing the partnership with a stable and steady income for the both of you. They may also be quite concerned for your health and wellbeing, happily taking care of you best they can on your sick days.

If afflicted, the partner may be overly critical and and faulty finding in the things you do and the way you do them. They may have the compulsion to brush you to the side when they feel ‘You’re not doing it right’ when you simply just aren’t doing something THIER way, which can ultimately make you frustrated. They may complain about the most mundane incidences which may get on your nerves. They may also be a workaholic, often not giving you enough attention and appreciation.  

Ultimately what you desire in a marriage or long-term partnership is dependability and punctuality whereby they follow through when they say they will do something and when, cleanliness and practicality, has a stable day-to-day job to earn money for the both of you.

Juno in Libra

With this placement, you may desire a traditional marriage and long-term partnership whereby you and your partner are as equally committed to one another in the relationship. You desire a stable, balanced and fair marriage partner, one that can see and understand your point of view, and even if they disagree, they can find a compromise and see a value in your opinion on things. You desire someone who is fair and respectful of you and the things you do and happily returns the favour to you. You desire a long-term partner who is open about communicating and aims to settle any dispute before they get out of hand. You want someone who is a traditional romantic, and never forgets to express their love and affection for you. The marriage partner may be quite attractive and have a wonderful sense of style, and may be somewhat artistic, or at least has an appreciation of beauty and the arts. They may be quite charming and charismatic and perhaps rather social, and have a strong sense of justice and may have an interest in government or law.

If Juno is afflicted, the marriage partner may fabricate truth in order to cover something that they’ve done or not being truthful in their opinion. They may be quite indecisive about things which can make the relationship frustrating if decisions are always left for you and also, it may make them lazy when it comes to choosing and pursing something in life. They may also be manipulative towards you if they don’t like someone, telling you things about them to make you alternate your perspective so you can dislike them as a couple - while what they had said may not have been true, they want your reassurance that they are still the ‘good guy’, and as a marriage partner they demand that support from you. They may also be indecisive about getting married or the relationship itself

Ultimately what you desire in a long-term committed partnership is fairness, balance, harmony, communication and understanding one another perspective, love and diplomacy, compromise and beauty in the relationship.

Juno in Scorpio

With this placement, you desire an intense and deep connection to your marriage partner, where you unite all aspects of your body, mind and soul. You want passion and security in the sense of deep intimacy in your relationship, knowing your partner is truly connected to you and will stay by your side giving you their full devotion. You may find yourself transformed as a person after marriage, perhaps in the house area your Juno is placed. The partner may be deeply sexual and passionate, and together you share highly intense intimate moments, going through emotional highs and lows, though in the end it can feel rejuvenating leaving you feeling the high of being alive, which may be quite healing for you. You want to be able to trust your partner with all of your deepest secrets, and except all of your flaws and your past hardships, whereby being with them can allow healing of yourself and your past and anything you may face in the future.

If afflicted, Juno in Scorpio can manifest a very possessive partner who may try and control what you’re doing, where you’re going, and who you socialise with. They may easily become jealous and you need to constantly reassure them of your commitment to them, even if you feel its unnecessary. They may be quite secretive and mysterious which may make it frustrating for you to know what they want and to understand them better. They can also be quite self-destructive which can make the relationship exceedingly difficult. At times, their nature can become highly overbearing but once they break down they tend to build themselves back up again, especially with your assistance and presence.

Ultimately what you want in a marriage or long-term committed partnership is deep connection, passion, intense intimacy, sex, to share each others emotional highs and lows, unwavering commitment, and the power to get through any challenged you face together.

Juno in Sagittarius

With this placement, there is a very high need for freedom in a long-term partnership, and this placement be the most likely to avoid marriage simple because you (or the potential partner) doesn’t want to feel caged in a legally documented commitment. If you do choose to get married you need an extensive amount of freedom to come and go as you please, and to do what you want and when. The marriage partner on the other hand may be quite open natured, optimistic and humorous. They may have a philosophical and expansive outlook on life, and can unconsciously take on a spiritual direction in life because of their open-mindedness. They may have a passion for travel and exploring foreign countries and experiencing different cultures. You may in fact meet the marriage partner overseas, or they are originally from a foreign country.

They may be quite jovial and fun, always encouraging you to go on an adventure somewhere new with them.

If afflicted, the marriage partner may care about their personal freedom so much that they are unwilling to commit. They don’t want to be tied down and therefore have a back and forth nature in terms of the relationship by where you get too close, and they pull away. They may stumble into a marriage without much forethought of what that actually entails, then once the realisation sets in, they may opt for a divorce (but may even still want a relationship - just without a title), which may make this quite frustrating for you. The partner may be exceedingly hard to pin down and they may be quite reluctant to open up emotionally.

Ultimately what you desire in a long-term commitment relationship is FREEDOM, fun and light heartedness, changeability to keep it interesting and a constant learning experience, open-mindedness, traveling together and playfulness.

Juno in Capricorn

You desire the security and reliability found in marriage, and you want the relationship to be built on a strong foundation of knowing the partner very well before you are willing to commit. Once you have married, you do not want to separate from the partner and will do whatever is in your personal power to bring structure back to the relationship. You may attract a very hardworking and dutiful partner, who may be heavily involved in their own work life and career. They may express a very authorise stance in the relationship, and be quite serious in their personality nature. They may expect you and themselves to take traditional roles in marriage, or that they insist on being the ‘leader’ in the relationship. They may be significantly older than you and be quite conventional in the way they do things and structure the marriage life. They may be quite dutiful and take on the most difficult tasks, and also the responsibility of maintain the relationship, especially when it comes to providing the both of you with income. They may not be the most demonstrative and overly affectionate partner, but they express their love and devotion through their actions and providing for you.

If afflicted, the marriage partner may be quite cold and pessimistic, and they seem to force the authoritative role in a relationship and set you a role which they expect you to fill. Their lack of affection and romantic gestures can be quite disheartening for you, and their lack of gratification if you give to them may also make you feel unappreciated. They can also be overly controlling, dictating where you go and when, which you can greatly detest in the relationship. Also, their devotion to their job and work can leave you feeling lonely at times.

Ultimately what you desire in a marriage is comfort in traditional and conventional commitment, practicality and dutifulness, a hard worker, someone to prove for you, someone who can take leadership and is self-disciplined.

Juno in Aquarius

With this placement, you may desire a marriage partner who is a humanitarian that has a large social circle, whereby they know many people from many different places and therefore you can go with them to interact with a variety of people and gain new experiences. You may want a partner who is quite friendly and idealistic, one who is innovative and progressive in the way they do things, either for themselves or for the benefit of a larger extent of people. You may greatly desire a highly intellectual partner, who’s emotional detachment from things and people allows them to see things from an objective perspective. They may greatly enjoy socialising with anyone at any given time, and you may find yourself doing the same with them, even if it wasn’t something you would intentionally do previous to meeting and forming a relationship (or marriage) with this person. They may also express a sense of duty and authority, but more in an intellectual leadership manner than by commanding a following. There may be something eccentric or unconventional about the marriage partner, and this can include their personal interests, their likes and/or dislikes, or simply a significant age difference which is seen as unusual in society.

If afflicted, the partner may be quite emotionally withdrawn and detached. Although you may know they hold affections for you, they may have trouble expressing it due to their highly intellectual nature and they may uphold their masculine qualities too much to the point where its difficult to become emotionally vulnerable to you. If you attempt to openly express your emotions towards them, they may distance themselves from you.

There can also be a fear of commitment, from you or your partner with this placement, often withholding marriage, if you ever do decide to get married. It’s not uncommon with this placement for the native to stay single for life because of their choosing. You (or they) may value ones personal freedom and need for experimentation above the need for a solid relationship, which can mean manifesting as an open relationship.

Ultimately what you desire in a long-term committed relationship is to have your own sense of personal freedom and space, socialisation with others together, having new experiences, genuine friendship with the marriage partner, understanding and tolerance of ones own eccentricities.

Juno in Pisces

With this placement, you desire a very sensitive, gentle and romantic marriage partner. You want to be able to get lost in them and their presence and experience unconditional love and care from them. You desire someone who is modest, compassionate and empathetic to you and your needs, as well as being selfless, compassionate and giving to other people. You also may have to take care of the practical side of things for the marriage partner (or vice-versa). The marriage partner may be quite emotionally open and vulnerable, and is eager to care for you in anyway they can. They may at times try to mould themselves to be whatever you want them be. They may also have a soft spot for animals and enjoys caring for all forms of life.  The marriage partner may also have a strong interest in the arts, including painting, acting, film making and/or photography. They may also be interested in caring for other people, giving themselves freely in a sympathetic form of service such as nursing or caring for the elderly, and generally helping those who are underprivileged and less fortunate. There is also the possibility for the marriage partner to be highly intuitive and/or psychic (empath). You may also idealise the potential partner, conjuring a fantasy of getting married to a creation from your imagination. This fantasy may also be projected onto the real life marriage partner, whereby you ignore there flaws and only see them as your idea of perfection.  

If afflicted, the marriage partner may be too overly self-sacrificing to the point of their own detriment. They may either over work or over give themselves for little in return, then they end up playing the victim and express that ‘no one cares about me’ even though they put themselves into that position in the first place - then you end up coming to their rescue, having to coddle them because they refuse to take responsibility for their own actions. They may also be too much of a dreamer and live in their dreams and ideals, and not attempt to put them into action. They may at times become confused or have extremely high or low emotional episodes where you have to make sure you measure them that all will turn out fine in the end. There is also a possibility of drug and alcohol abuse from the partner.

Ultimately what you desire in a  long-term committed relationship is unconditional love and affection, empathy and sympathy, gentleness and modesty, an openly giving personality , and loves you completely for who you are.

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“Bangles are traditional ornaments worn mostly by South Asian women in India, Pakistan and Bangladesh. It is a common tradition to see a new bride wearing glass bangles at her wedding. Bangles also have a very traditional value in Hinduism and it is considered inauspicious to be bare armed for a married woman. Chooda is a kind of bangle that is worn by Punjabi women on her wedding day. It is a set of white and red bangles with stone work. According to tradition, a woman is not supposed to buy the bangles she will wear. Moradabad is India’s largest producer of bangles.”

Juno

Juno is the marriage asteroid. The Roman goddess was married to Jupiter (and Hera, her Greek equivalent, to Zeus). Juno was the goddess of marriage, childbirth, and a protector of women. She is the Queen of the gods. When Jupiter/Zeus was unfaithful she would exact her revenge on him and his lovers. In the chart she represents the marriage we seek out or have, or the marriage partner. This also applies to long-term relationships, any relationship where commitment to one another is central.

Juno in Aries/1st House: Firey, passionate, child-like or selfish in marriage. Marriage partner with the same qualities, a more masculine/assertive/aggressive partner. Juno in the 1st embodies the Juno/Hera archetype of committed spouse. Individual that identifies with Juno.
Juno in Taurus/2nd House: A steady, committed, comfortable marriage. Loyal, down-to-earth marriage partner. Romantic partner, sensual partner. Material security through marriage.
Juno in Gemini/3rd House: Intellectual, social, witty marriage partner. Marriage based off of common interests, ever-changing, a marriage that helps you learn.
Juno in Cancer/4th House: A marriage that feels like home. Traditional values, deep emotional bond. A sensitive and caring marriage partner, partners that nurture one another. In the 4th house, desire for partner is intrinsic to the soul.
Juno in Leo/5th House: A flashy marriage, a partner you can be proud of, a heart-centered marriage. Warm love, romantic, playful. Marriage partner that gives you validation.
Juno in Virgo/6th House: Practical marriage, intellectual marriage partner, a marriage where you can keep your autonomy. Marriage partner that serves you, helps you with chores. A partner you work with.
Juno in Libra/7th House: Very relationship-oriented, finds self through marriage. Balanced and equal partnership, searching for the life partner. Romantic and wistful partner, fair partner. In the 7th House, may be searching for someone that embodies the Juno/Hera archetype of committed spouse.
Juno in Scorpio/8th House: Intense emotional partnership, sexual marriage full of intrigue, loyal partner, ‘til death do us part. There may be a shadow side, secrets, room for the shadow to come out and be healed. Marriage based off of intimacy. Shared income and riches through marriage.
Juno in Sagittarius/9th House: A marriage that allows for freedom, a marriage that expands one’s life. Marriage partner from a different culture or country. Traveling together, learning together, discovering together. May veer towards the Jupiter/Zeus archetype in the marriage.
Juno in Capricorn/10th House: Traditional marriage, family values, a marriage/partner that looks good to the public. A marriage built on a solid and secure foundation. A practical marriage, a serious marriage. In the 10th House, the Juno/Hera archetype may be the individual’s greatest potential, or what they show to the public. May be married to their career or meet spouse through work.
Juno in Aquarius/11th House: Non-traditional or alternative marriage, marriage based off of common interests, weird marriage, eccentric or unique partner. Individuality through marriage. Meeting your spouse through friends or a group you belong to. Married to your best friend.
Juno in Pisces/12th House: Marriage raised to the heavens, spiritual partnership, empathetic and compassionate partner, emotional bond, union through marriage. Healing or being healed through serious relationship. In the 12th, desire for marriage may be unconscious or hidden.

Juno Retrograde: Desire for marriage or sense of the Juno/Hera archetype may not be seen by others in you, but it is felt deeply by the individual.


-Pegasus Astrology / Lauren Crowley

Juno in Aries: marriage as a new beginning
Juno in Taurus: marriage as an investment
Juno in Gemini: marriage as the linking of consciousnesses
Juno in Cancer: marriage as the heart finding a new home
Juno in Leo: marriage as a declaration of undying passion
Juno in Virgo: marriage as a devout life improvement
Juno in Libra: marriage as the discovery of the other half
Juno in Scorpio: marriage as the intertwining of fates
Juno in Sagittarius: marriage as another adventure
Juno in Capricorn: marriage as adherence to tradition
Juno in Aquarius: marriage as the convergence of ideals
Juno in Pisces: marriage as the merging of spirits

EMPOWERMENT

Things that are actually empowering to women and girls:

1. Physicality
becoming physically stronger empowers us. exercising your body not only makes your body stronger and more powerful, but it brings discipline and helps you connect with your body instead of disconnect.
being able to physically be at a location is empowering. feminists should be fighting to make all places accessible to disabled women.
disabled women should also have access to any type of exercises and physical therapy they can do. i would especially like to see more public pools having more physical therapy programs. swimming is a great way to exercise for strength while not putting any gravitational or impact on your body

2. Knowledge

Knowledge is empowering. having knowledge about how our own bodies work is empowering. women and girls who are.knowledgeable are not easily misled. in this vein, learning how to properly debate arguments and think critically about yours and others words and beliefs is empowering. having the ability to trust yourself comes with gaining knowledge.

3. Access to Fulfilling Work.

work that feeds our love and passion is empowering. workplaces with atmospheres where everyone is happy and excited to work with women are empowering. workplaces free from sexual attacks empower women. women stimulating their minds and souls is empowering. women doing the work they find stimulating gives us a sense of purpose.

many women of all different walks of life have a high propensity for art. charging them with female representation in media will empower us all by putting forth the huge diversity that women display as human beings with full experiences and lives and stories to tell.

evidence shows that the least depressed cohort of women are the ones who work and who are financially independent, not the married housewives.

4. Reproductive and Sexual Rights.

women having control over our own.reproduction is empowering. women having orgasms and thinking about our own pleasure during sex is empowering. women accepting their own physical form and refusing to be disrespected by men who find them unacceptable because of their physical form is empowering. women refusing intercourse if it does nothing for their pleasure or they dont want to take the risk is empowering. women not being forced to sell their own bodies is empowering. women having control over OUR OWN BODIES is freedom.

Things that are NOT empowering to girls and women:

1. Femininity

being small, delicate, and on display is not empowering and it never will be. wearing high heels damages our feet and is not empowering. wearing makeup because society does not believe we as women are acceptable without it is not empowering. having long and/or fake nails limits the use of our hands and is not empowering. our collective bodies are not for men to look at and enjoy as they go about their day in comfortable, dignified clothing.

kindness, nurturing, and the desire to help others are good qualities in moderation, and they should be thouhght of as sex-neutral qualities everyone should work on, not just women. women are not the only ones who should be expected to be nurturing and giving.

aspiring for smallness is the opposite of enpowering. women need to eat. women are allowed to grow. our goal should be comfort and health, not emancipation and fragility.

2. Self-objectification

our hands are for doing tasks and our feet are for mobility. our faces are to house our brains and feed us, not a thing for men to find either acceptable or unacceptable to look at. every part of our bodies are for OUR use, not for the use of others. we exist for ourselves. our bodies are not naturally political and they are all acceptable and worthy of humanity, no matter what they look like or what issues they have.

3. Submission

Submissiveness is not empowering. lowering your worth until it is under the worth you give someone elses humanity is self-harm. humiliation and degredation arise out of the degraders sense of superiority over the one submitting to him. being treated as inferior will never empower anyone.

4. Marriage and Traditional Nuclear Family

marriage is a contract of ownership where women take on the last name of men. nuclear families are an extension of male ownership to not only include women but the children they objectify as their legacy of power. men expect women to raise children while they work, but women have goals and dreams too. men expect women to drop these goals and sacrifice only their lives to raise children that men see as their property and investment. men leave the majority of menial housework and micro-cleaning to women. marriage and nuclear families will never be empowering.

5. Outside Control over Reproduction.

up to and including abortion. ALSO involving lack of access to childcare and paid leave. this one explains itself.

6. The Sex Industry.

Mens entitlement over females and our bodies will NEVER be empowering and MUST end.

Now, can people stop using this word for things that ARENT giving women any actual power? Glad we had this talk.

Three Important Quotes About Christian Relationships

“Imagine a man so focused on God that the only reason he looked up to see you is because he heard God say, ‘That’s her.’” 
- Unknown

“A woman’s heart should be so close to God that a man should have to chase Him to find her.” 
- C.S. Lewis

“How can you give your heart to someone if they don’t know to Whom your heart belongs? How will they understand your heart if they don’t know Who made it? In order for your hearts to be united, they should have in common a true love for God and passion to follow His Word.”

- Me

Marital Signifiers

So I had a dream where two people from very different cultures have to get married to prevent a war, and in it, one culture used rings to signify marriage while the other used (pierced) earrings.

This got me thinking about what traditions exist to visually show that someone is married. So a bit of research later, some examples are:

  • Wearing a ring (left or right hand, depending on culture) on the “ring” finger (third finger), sometimes getting a tattoo on the appropriate finger (especially if the person’s job makes wearing an actual ring dangerous and/or impractical)
  • (For men) having a beard, or wearing a prayer shawl
  • (For women) wearing a special necklace, or special bangles, or special hair style/covering, or a sindoor

So that’s pretty cool, but I think there are lots of other ways people could show that they’re married. (And maybe there are cultures that do–they just weren’t among the ones I found in my 30 minutes of googling). Maybe things like:

  • Pierced ears/nose/lip
  • Specific colour of nail polish and/or tattoo on hands/fingers
  • Hair length (either unwed individuals must keep hair short, or unwed individuals are not allowed to cut their hair until after marriage)
  • Special type of clothing (a sash, shawl, belt, or scarf)
  • Specific colour of clothing (for example, maybe only married people can wear blue)
  • Less visual, but what if only married people could use certain scents (like lavender) for their soaps and/or fragrances?

There are lots of possibilities! So why not use something other than “exchanging rings” in your fantasy story? Just make sure you think about what that means for the culture. (For example, puzzle rings [which are super cool–I love the ‘woven’ look] were originally developed to catch wives who cheated on their husbands, because they fall apart when taken off. Which shows that women weren’t trusted, and that they weren’t expected to be very clever [otherwise they could put the ring back together])

Permanent markings (like tattoos and piercings) are likely used in a culture where divorces are either not common, or not allowed. Might make for an interesting exploration to look at how such a culture might handle widows/widowers, or those rare instances of divorce. (Do they have a different way to show widowhood vs divorce? How easy/hard is it for a divorcee to make it look like their widowed instead?)

For specific colours/items only available to married individuals, think about how easy it is for the poorest people in the society to access. Do they have to use alternatives to achieve the same visual representation of their marriage? (For example, if a sparkling teal nail polish is what denotes a married person, but it’s expensive, do poor use a fruit/flower that stains their fingertips instead? Maybe the polish is accessible to everyone, but then the rich are going to want some way to denote their wealth as well [comparable to massive engagement rings], so maybe they use a flat teal and then add the sparkle by placing tiny slivers of diamonds on the wet polish?)

And then you must think about the difference in how men and women (and other genders, if it’s a multi-gendered society) present their symbol of marriage. Even with a symbol like a ring that both men and women use, the rings are often very different in appearance. Men’s rings tend to be thicker and simpler, while women’s rings tend to be thinner and more “elegant” (swoops, swirls, curls, multiple gems, etc.). So in a society that uses nail polish or piercings to show marriage, how might it be worn by different genders?

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Outlander 1x07 // Game of Thrones 7x07

“Handfasting, was a tradition form of marriage or religious rite of passage for people in Scotland until the 19th century. It has now, been adapted to those practicing in more Nature based religions, to allow couples to make a commitment  to each other, regardless of ethnic culture. There is no set rule when performing a handfasting ritual, there can be only guidelines. It is up to the two people carrying out the ritual to decide “exactly” how they wish it to be performed, in order to make it meaningful. Traditionally the palms or wrists were slightly cut to shed some blood so that their blood  may be exchanged and therefore signifying how seriously this commitment is taken by both parties. In Scotland there used to be handfasting ‘chant’ that went something as follows, “ blood of my blood and bone of my bone…”. Today, couples favor just the handfasting with a ribbon without the blood ritual.  Vows, which have been written by each person are then exchanged, signifying the spoken contact between the two. Rings (or jewelry of some description) are exchanged to symbolise eternal love. After the vows and the rings, the couples wrists are then unbound and they can walk together along the same path.”