traditional engagement

Never chase a Man. If He wants you, He will come and get you.

Men are natural hunters; they go for what they want. If a man wants to be with you, he will pursue you and make you his. If he wants to marry you, he will propose. The right man will never leave you wondering if you are a priority. Men go hard for what they want, if he isn’t going hard for you then you aren’t what he wants. The right man will do everything in his power to keep his woman happy and by his side.

Your Sun/Moon Combination Keywords

~Aries~

Aries Sun, Aries Moon: Impulsive, Lively, Determined

Aries Sun, Taurus Moon: Tactful, Sensual, Gracious

Aries Sun, Gemini Moon: Popular, Open-Minded, Talkative

Aries Sun, Cancer Moon: Loyal, Secure, Emotional

Aries Sun, Leo Moon: Courageous, Affectionate, Ambitious

Aries Sun, Virgo Moon: Conversant, Sincere, Careful

Aries Sun, Libra Moon: Adventurous, Dynamic, Restless

Aries Sun, Scorpio Moon: Competitive, Intellectual, Magnetic

Aries Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Active, Inquisitive, Exciting

Aries Sun, Capricorn Moon: Practical, Responsible, Motivated

Aries Sun, Aquarius Moon: Idealistic, Amusing, Romantic

Aries Sun, Pisces Moon: Creative, Temperamental, Impressionable

~Taurus~

Taurus Sun, Aries Moon: Goal-Oriented, Disciplined, Vigorous

Taurus Sun, Taurus Moon: Truthful, Calm, Attentive

Taurus Sun, Gemini Moon: Bright, Pragmatic, Charming

Taurus Sun, Cancer Moon: Kind, Imaginative, Peaceful

Taurus Sun, Leo Moon: Opinionated, Strong, Innovative

Taurus Sun, Virgo Moon: Convincing, Dedicated, Logical

Taurus Sun, Libra Moon: Charismatic, Delicate, Relaxed

Taurus Sun, Scorpio Moon: Subtle, Empathetic, Clever

Taurus Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Passionate, Sociable, Direct

Taurus Sun, Capricorn Moon: Prestige, Dependable, Stable

Taurus Sun, Aquarius Moon: Faithful, Generous, Flexible

Taurus Sun, Pisces Moon: Susceptible, Gentle, Spiritual

~Gemini~

Gemini sun, Aries Moon: Quick, Excitable, Well-Spoken

Gemini sun, Taurus Moon: Outgoing, Youthful, Structural

Gemini sun, Gemini Moon: Favored, Unpredictable, Problem-Solver

Gemini sun, Cancer Moon: Playful, Witty, Skillful

Gemini sun, Leo Moon: Prideful, Enterprising, Amiable

Gemini sun, Virgo Moon: Versatile, Intelligent, Lighthearted

Gemini sun, Libra Moon: Harmonious, Idealistic, Resilient

Gemini sun, Scorpio Moon: Forceful, Intuitive, Brilliant

Gemini sun, Sagittarius Moon: Free, Educated, Vivid

Gemini sun, Capricorn Moon: Shrewd, Objective, Professional

Gemini sun, Aquarius Moon: Helpful, Optimistic, Agile

Gemini sun, Pisces Moon: Conscientious, Detailed, Speculating

~Cancer~

Cancer Sun, Aries Moon: Combustive, Principal, Aspiring

Cancer Sun, Taurus Moon: Compassionate, Protective, Loving

Cancer Sun, Gemini Moon: Yielding, Curious, Reflective

Cancer Sun, Cancer Moon: Touchy, Guarding, Genial

Cancer Sun, Leo Moon: Proud, Interesting, Neat

Cancer Sun, Virgo Moon: Solid, Traditional, Practical

Cancer Sun, Libra Moon: Gentle, Busy, Supportive

Cancer Sun, Scorpio Moon: Magnetic, Ardent, Private

Cancer Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Inspiring, Free-Spirited, Polite

Cancer Sun, Capricorn Moon: Eager, Reassuring, Self-Disciplined

Cancer Sun, Aquarius Moon: Wise, Aristocratic, Honored

Cancer Sun, Pisces Moon: Passive, Unique, Talented

~Leo~

Leo Sun, Aries Moon: Fierce, Outright, Driven

Leo Sun, Taurus Moon: Visionary, Durable, Efficient

Leo Sun, Gemini Moon: Delightful, Facile, Reasonable

Leo Sun, Cancer Moon: Ingenious, Easy-Going, Family-Oriented

Leo Sun, Leo Moon: Bold, Attractive, Dignified

Leo Sun, Virgo Moon: Selective, Thoughtful, Timid

Leo Sun, Libra Moon: Idealistic, Methodical, Alert

Leo Sun, Scorpio Moon: Passionate, Opportunistic, Fulfilling

Leo Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Intriguing, Warm, Straightforward

Leo Sun, Capricorn Moon: Keen, Good-Natured, Trustworthy

Leo Sun, Aquarius Moon: Vital, Inspiring, Concerned

Leo Sun, Pisces Moon: Kind-Hearted, Aware, Sentimental

~Virgo~

Virgo Sun, Aries Moon: Thoughtful, Demanding, High-Spirited

Virgo Sun, Taurus Moon: Reliable, Honest, Loyal

Virgo Sun, Gemini Moon: Deliberate, Active, Perceiving

Virgo Sun, Cancer Moon: Nurturing, Conservative, Secure

Virgo Sun, Leo Moon: Jovial, Earnest, Conscientious

Virgo Sun, Virgo Moon: Organized, Well-Mannered, Healthy

Virgo Sun, Libra Moon: Enciting, Selective, Intimate

Virgo Sun, Scorpio Moon: Sly, Prudent, Calculating

Virgo Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Traditional, Engaging, Humorous

Virgo Sun, Capricorn Moon: Hardworking, Mature, Realistic

Virgo Sun, Aquarius Moon: Down-To-Earth, Analytical, Exploring

Virgo Sun, Pisces Moon: Contemplative, Artistic, Adviceful

~Libra~

Libra Sun, Aries Moon: Striking, Erratic, Extroverted

Libra Sun, Taurus Moon: Likable, Balanced, Tactful

Libra Sun, Gemini Moon: Expressive, Social, Flirtatious

Libra Sun, Cancer Moon: Diplomatic, Serene, Gifted

Libra Sun, Leo Moon: Captivating, Honest, Lucky

Libra Sun, Virgo Moon: Rational, Organized, Insightful

Libra Sun, Libra Moon: Excitable, Charming, Trusting

Libra Sun, Scorpio Moon: Determined, Absorbing, Radical

Libra Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Outgoing, Eager, Positive

Libra Sun, Capricorn Moon: Warm, Strong, Purposeful

Libra Sun, Aquarius Moon: Humanitarian, Even-Tempered, Approachable

Libra Sun, Pisces Moon: Tender, Changeable, Artistic

~Scorpio~

Scorpio Sun, Aries Moon: Mysterious, Fearless, Tenacious

Scorpio Sun, Taurus Moon: Securing, Confident, Sensible

Scorpio Sun, Gemini Moon: Sensual, Businesslike, Sophisticated

Scorpio Sun, Cancer Moon: Independent, Bold, Curative

Scorpio Sun, Leo Moon: Alluring, Self-Assured, Decisive

Scorpio Sun, Virgo Moon: Observant, Reserved, Soft-Spoken

Scorpio Sun, Libra Moon: Elegant, Creative, High-Minded

Scorpio Sun, Scorpio Moon: Powerful, Deep, Diligent

Scorpio Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Ironic, Explosive, Affectionate

Scorpio Sun, Capricorn Moon: Persistent, Steadfast, Severe

Scorpio Sun, Aquarius Moon: Fascinating, Civil, Influential

Scorpio Sun, Pisces Moon: Psychic, Rightful, Kind

~Sagittarius~

Sagittarius sun, Aries moon: Good-Hearted, Cheerful, Wild

Sagittarius sun, Taurus Moon: Aspiring, Faithful, Romantic

Sagittarius sun, Gemini Moon: Entertaining, Talkative, Smart

Sagittarius sun, Cancer Moon: Spiritual, Foresightful, Dreamy

Sagittarius sun, Leo Moon: Daring, Open, Productive  

Sagittarius sun, Virgo Moon: Broad-Minded, Realistic, Analytical

Sagittarius sun, Libra Moon: Joyful, Sincere, Intellectual

Sagittarius sun, Scorpio Moon: Sarcastic, Go-Getter, Defensive

Sagittarius sun, Sagittarius Moon: Optimistic, Noticeable, Disquisitive

Sagittarius sun, Capricorn Moon: Self-Examining, Affirmative, Realistic

Sagittarius sun, Aquarius Moon: Philosophical, Trustworthy, Intuitive

Sagittarius sun, Pisces Moon: Understanding, Tolerant, Imaginative

~Capricorn~

Capricorn Sun, Aries moon: Willful, Invulnerable, Powerful

Capricorn Sun, Taurus Moon: Influential, Reliable, Conservative

Capricorn Sun, Gemini Moon: Innovative, Bright, Swift

Capricorn Sun, Cancer Moon: Domestic, Supportive, Sharp-Witted

Capricorn Sun, Leo Moon: Demonstrative, Committed, Friendly

Capricorn Sun, Virgo Moon: Ambitious, Reserved, Objective

Capricorn Sun, Libra Moon: Disciplined, Benevolent, Smooth

Capricorn Sun, Scorpio Moon: Insightful, Deep, Driven

Capricorn Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Carefree, Funny, Rational

Capricorn Sun, Capricorn Moon: Successful, Giving, Inspiring

Capricorn Sun, Aquarius Moon: Serious, Wise, Accountable

Capricorn Sun, Pisces Moon: Forthright, Humane, Sympathetic

~Aquarius~

Aquarius Sun, Aries moon: Aggressive, Independent, Enthusiastic

Aquarius Sun, Taurus Moon: Curious, Appealing, Headstrong

Aquarius Sun, Gemini Moon: Elightened, Original, Beguiling

Aquarius Sun, Cancer Moon: Patient, Candid, Perceptive

Aquarius Sun, Leo Moon: Helpful, Friendly, Dignified

Aquarius Sun, Virgo Moon: Careful, Competent, Structural

Aquarius Sun, Libra Moon: Respectful, Optimistic, Peace-Loving

Aquarius Sun, Scorpio Moon: Compassionate, Charismatic, Enterprising

Aquarius Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Adventurous, Experienced, Admirable

Aquarius Sun, Capricorn Moon: Purposeful, Ethical, Prudent

Aquarius Sun, Aquarius Moon: Unique, Open-Minded, Wise

Aquarius Sun, Pisces Moon: Judicious, Big-Hearted, Mythical

~Pisces~

Pisces Sun, Aries Moon: Keen, Self-Reliant, Charitable

Pisces Sun, Taurus Moon: Easy-Going, Considerate, Vibrant

Pisces Sun, Gemini Moon: Adaptable, Conceptual, Creative

Pisces Sun, Cancer Moon: Humble, Talented, Controlled

Pisces Sun, Leo Moon: Humorous, Different, Trustworthy

Pisces Sun, Virgo Moon: Devoted, Astute, Determined,

Pisces Sun, Libra Moon: Accommodating, Enchanting, Peaceful

Pisces Sun, Scorpio Moon: Emotional, Mysterious, Secretive

Pisces Sun, Sagittarius Moon: Expansive, Protective, Sensible

Pisces Sun, Capricorn Moon: Kind, Introverted, Subtle

Pisces Sun, Aquarius Moon: Missionary, Humanitarian, Intellectual

Pisces Sun, Pisces Moon: Ethereal, Sympathetic, Dreamy

Fandometrics In Depth: WWE Edition

Wikipedia describes professional wrestling as “an athletic form of storytelling that portrays a combat sport.” The finest form of this athletic storytelling is exhibited by the members of the @wwe, and the finest place to chronicle their fables is on Tumblr. Throughout 2016, there were over a million posts and reblogs about the #WWE and we analyzed every one of them.

The thing to know about wrestling on Tumblr is that it’s huge. Andre The Giant–huge.

Originally posted by totaldivasepisodes

Wrestling is the biggest sport on Tumblr

In 2016, the #wwe tag got…

  • 224% more engagement (searches, original posts, reblogs and likes) than #basketball, the most-engaged traditional sport
  • 489% more engagements than #soccer, and
  • 749% more engagements than #nfl

But wrestling isn’t just the biggest sport. It’s the biggest on TV.

Originally posted by totaldivasepisodes

Wrestling Smash

Those huge numbers are not just limited to sports. WWE’s most popular weekly show, Raw, airs on Mondays. We looked back at the past six months, and compared it to three other Monday night shows:

As you can see in the chart below, WWE peaked every Monday throughout the summer.  There are no hiatuses in the WWE. August’s SummerSlam and its corresponding Raw episode was one of the biggest moments in the sport in 2016.  In fact, there were 692% more original posts made about #WWE on August 21st and 22nd than there were for Supergirl, Shadowhunters and Gotham combined.

Top Wrestlers

The uninitiated might assume that John Cena is number 1, but actually the most popular wrestler is Dean Ambrose (aka alternate universe Ed Sheeran), who was posted about 408% more than the Leader of the Cenanation. Probably because Ambrose was the top WWE champion for most of the year, but maybe also because people were shipping Ambreigns. On the Diva side, @sashabankswwe was the most talked about, coinciding with her draft to Raw and her first Women’s Championship title win in July.

Want more wrestling in your dash? 💪
Follow these tags: 👊 

#wrestling (obviously), #professional wrestling (of course), #wwe, #wwe raw, #summerslam, #smackdown, or whatever the name of your favorite wrestler is, even if they’re from the distant past.

Regarding the PASH Article

I’m not usually the type to make tumblr posts but I see people freaking out over this interview and honestly while I will say that Kubo’s comment WAS REALLY NOT A GOOD THING FOR HER TO SAY it wasn’t nearly as drastic as people are thinking it is in translation. 

To start off, what she originally said in Japanese was as follows:  「結婚的な意味合いよりも、部活の仲間同士で同じものを持とう、みたいなノリに近いです。」How I translated it personally was “More than the marriage-like meaning [of the rings], they have the feeling of partners representing a club.“ 

Note, the  合いよりも or “MORE THAN” aspect of this. This is not saying that it means it wasn’t also with marriage intentions. Simply, that the omamori or good luck purpose was the main intention for Yuuri. However it doesn’t change the fact that 1) he bought literal wedding rings 2) he bought them after closely looking at JJ’s engagement 3) he verbatim followed a traditional Russian style engagement 4) Victor himself referred to them as engaged.

The way I always interpreted the scene was that Yuuri himself did the engagement in a way that was reflective of his anxiety. He never explicitly asked Victor to marry him. He absolutely knew Victor knew what he was getting at, however Yuuri himself used very ambiguous language and painted it as “good luck” as a way out in case Victor rejected him. Later, when Phichit announced that they were married, Victor claimed that they were engaged. This sealed that particular meaning of the rings. I think Victor knew what he was doing, given leaked storyboards. 

Yuuri: For good luck!

Victor: (big eyed) So that’s what he means.

Victor, given his revealed thoughts and expression, always knew that Yuuri was teetering around this issue. People ignore that in the anime, he also looked kind of hurt. This is something Japanese fans picked up on, but not Western fans.

And this following smile always looked a little fake to me

That sort of reminded me of his OTHER obviously fake smile

Which still does not negate this

I actually find it kind of amusing. A lot of people have written about how this was the exact moment they got engaged, yet now the fact that it wasn’t explicitly so before is the worst thing ever.

Also I’d like to point out how so much of this series is Yuuri being indirect as hell about their relationship and giving Victor whiplash. Why must best boy suffer so much ;_;


Regarding everything else and Kubo’s ambiguity she does seem like the type that’s “if it’s not explicitly stated it’s up for interpretation” type of writer. Which is annoying and stupid, but it’s so obvious that they’re a thing. Even everything else Kubo has said such as how they’re “soulmates” in “true love”, how she talks about homophobia not existing in their world, how she positively interacts with tweets talking about how they’re a couple. The most damning thing is that she has the mentality of “let the show speak for itself.” Even though she is making some very bad wording decisions roughly half the time (the other half she pretty much outright talks about how they’re a couple) the show pretty clearly does so.

You also have Otsuka outright saying things such as how “When you show scenes that leave no room for other interpretations there’s a risk of it not sitting well with some people, but Kubo and Yamamoto always plunged forward with no hesitation” (source)   He’s the producer and where the money is, so if anyone would be big on not allowing confirmation, it would be him. But he is. He is very encouraging of Victor/Yuuri. You also have Sayo, who if anything outranks Kubo in terms of story, we just never hear from her due to her private nature. Who knows what she would say. 


TL;DR Kubo said something really dumb but it changes absolutely nothing in the grand scheme of things and wasn’t as “no-homo” as people in the western fandom believe

Edit: I answered an ask about Victor’s reactions [here]

Look, publishing community. We need to talk.

About ten years ago, you let the Twilight series take over the world, and with it, naive young girls’ belief that overly protective stalker boyfriends were something to strive for. Since the series’ completion, readers and moviegoers alike have vowed to do better. We hoped to put these toxic ideals behind us with every conversation we had about the problematic nature of Stephenie Meyer’s books. We hoped in doing so, we could finally move forward to read and support more wholesome, meaningful content.

Yet somehow, you chose to invest your money in Sarah J. Maas, and unleashed a whole new, far worse beast upon the world.

Why are we still letting toxic romances dominate the YA genre? Have we learned nothing from the likes of Meyer at all?

Keep reading

6

97/365 days of fitzsimmons

Ok since the whole tumblr is obsessed with Yuri!!! on Ice

I decided to give some advices especially to the artists who draw russian characters to make it less cringy for myself. I’m sure somebody might have already done something like this but I still want to bring up some points.


- to all shippers out there: russians wear wedding rings on the RIGHT HAND, not on the left;

- we also don’t have a tradition of the engagement rings;

- please, please, PLEASE don’t try to write/use russian phrases unless you actually know the language or can ask someone who knows it. Non-speakers won’t get them, latin transliteration is ugly as fuck, not to mention that the translator will 99.9% get it wrong somewhere. Use english, really;

- the same goes to writing in russian: please don’t do it unless you know how to. Redrawing russian printed letters looks weird at best. Russian cursive is a bitch but at least it’s a beautiful bitch;

- russians don’t celebrate Christmas on the December 25th. Orthodox Christmas is celebrated on the 7th of January and it’s not as global as western Christmas. It’s more of a religious tradition. But New Year celebration in Russia is HUGE. So if you want to draw a winter thematic art, new year theme would suit better;

- (also we don’t have Halloween);

- according to the rules of transliteration it’s ‘Viktor’. Not ‘Victor’;

- when drawing scenes of russian character with people they’re close to, use their short name forms. Especially with lovers. (So yeah use ‘Vitya’ and ‘Yura’ it’s really nice);

- there are more forms of russian names: some are tender, some are playful, some are cute, some even are weird. If you want to know a specific form just ask someone who’s native. But common short forms work almost always;

- there’s a difference between ‘nickname’ and 'short form of a name’. Russian names are very inclusive - all short forms of our name are also used as our name. Not in the official documents obviously but everywhere else. Like friends would never call each other by their full form names unless it’s a joke or 'their thing’;

- but things are different when it comes to a social hierarchy: for example a mentor can (and in most cases will) call their student by common short form of their name but student has to call their mentor by their full form and also add their 'otchestvo’ (father’s name, not the same as a second name), unless there is little or no age difference between them;

- this is more like a subjective opinion from me but being called by a full name by a close person (family/friend/lover) is somewhat mentally tiring for a russian. I mean it’s not like short form is an optional nickname that is used in specific situations by specific people. It’s a name that russian person hears for the most time. Being called by an 'official’ form all the time is quite exhausting. But maybe it’s just me;

- also this is totally off-topic but Yuri freaking out because there is another Yuuri with a name that is similar to his is so ridiculous. I mean russian names are common. Just while my school times I’ve met about 6 girls whose name was also 'Tatyana’. We didn’t shout at each other in the toilet.

Ok I think that’s it for now. Though I might have forgot something. Hm.
Somebody will probably disagree with me or will think that’s not important but I don’t care. It was worth a try.

Yeah, of course all of the above aren’t obligations but if you actually took them into consideration it would be really nice.

P.S. I also wrote one more piece of info.

6

The pejorative line in the show last night about knitting still rankles. It’s misogynistic and it’s not accurate.

@valiantnedspreciouslittlegirl​ wrote a post years ago about crafting and ASOIAF that I cannot seem to find,

D&D have this cardboard notion of what a “strong” woman is and it seems to involve knocking down other women, especially those who engage in “traditional” crafts.

Knitting for and by the military has a long history. Men, women, and children would knit socks and hats and other items for soldiers. It was considered a patriotic act. Soldiers themselves knit either on duty or in recovery.

It’s still done today for troops.

The Name Game

 Pairing: Finn Balor x Reader

Summary: Finn and Y/N find out the sex of their baby. Though the news is happy, the two cannot, for the life of them, agree on a name. 

Warnings: None! Super cute and fluffy. 

Word Count: 6,937

***********************************

If this were any other Saturday in Florida, Finn and Y/N could have been found doing a number of things. 

One, they probably could have been lounging poolside while the sun beat down heavy on their skin. 

Two, they could have been throwing a spur of the moment barbecue for them and all their friends, drinking like frat stars until one wound up with their head in the toilet while the other giggled and took embarrassing photos to post throughout the locker rooms the next live event; normally it was Y/N who couldn’t handle all her liquor, but Finn had his fair share of moments as well.

Three, the two of them could have easily been found locked in his air-conditioned condo, tangled up in the cool, white sheets while fingers and mouths explored the soft, bare skin each knew all too well. 

If this were any other Saturday, life for them would be completely simple.

But, this Saturday was different, and this mid-August day was one that neither saw coming so soon. 

It was supposed to be a traditional routine; date, get engaged, marry, and then maybe have a few children. 

Y/N should have known nothing was going to be traditional with Finn. Hell, the first time they’d locked eyes had been nowhere near traditional. 

Keep reading

For Catholics discerning marriage

For Catholics discerning marriage, a summary of the traditional stages/steps towards marriage

FRIENDSHIP PHASE - the couple are friends, getting to know each other

COURTSHIP PHASE - the couple become a bit more exclusive

ENGAGEMENT PHASE- when the man proposes to the woman, with an engagement ring

BETROTHAL PHASE- usually done with the priest blessing the couple, blessing the engagement ring & publicly declaring the couple betrothed in the church.  This also provides additional spiritual protection to the engaged couple during their engagement.  Traditionally, this is when the engagement ring can now be publicly worn.  I think this is a beautiful tradition that should be revived.  

THE WEDDING/MARRIAGE - 


See below for full details on what to do and what not to do in these stages 

http://thebeautifulcatholicfaith.tumblr.com/post/154987935849/four-stages-of-courtship-for-those-discerning

If you’re my Romeo then I’ll happily drink the poison: Chapter 1

Originally posted by tbholland

It’s part two! Well, chapter 1, part 2 of the story. I did this instead of work for another class so that’s good haha. Anyways thank you so much for the support you guys are insanely lovely. We’re getting into the fun part of the story. As always feedback is appreciated (good, bad, random).  I love you guys so enjoy!

Prologue; Chapter 2; Chapter 3; Chapter 4; Chapter 5

Masterlist

Word Count: 2603

Warnings: Blood (minimal). Swearing (because I love swearing)

Tag List: @sarcasticvodka @spee-iderman @johnmurphys-sass @clairesrainbow @girlykittycat @ntmybssns @aussie-mantle



“Pretty swanky for a prison,” A familiar voice said. You turn around and couldn’t help but smile. Naomi and you had been best friends since diapers (minus your brother), with your parents working closely together it was easy to bond. She’d always been artistic, so it’d make sense she handle all things creative when it came to you. She was your everything. Your hair, makeup, and fashion stylist. “What a beautiful prison,” You sulk looking around your temporary quarters. You and your family slipped in through the back entrance of the palace so you could avoid the prying eyes before the big moment. Cameras would be there watching your every move, trying to capture the moment you were supposed to fall in love with your Prince. Good thing you could fake it.

“Naomi, how was the flight?” You asked as your best friend sat down a dress bag.

“Might be a little tipsy on mimosas,” She shrugged unzipping the bag. “For you, beautiful.” 

You raised an eyebrow looking at the bag to find a white off the shoulder dress with sleeves. “You trust me wearing white?” 

“Personally no, but white signifies innocence or whatever,” Naomi brushed off. “Don’t ruin it please, your mother wants to save it as royal memorabilia or something. When you and Prince Thomas first lay eyes on each other.”

This whole ceremony was dumb. You knew what he looked like, it’s not like you lived under a rock. This would just be your first time actually interacting with each other. You could have easily met him, royal circles are small and he was relatively close with some of your friends, but any chance you had you avoided him. 

“Let’s get this over with,” You sighed changing into the dress. Naomi helped zip you up and handed you a pair of nude Louboutin’s. She was moving much quicker than she normally would, considering the fact you were in a time crunch. She began curling your hair as quickly as possible while you kept watching the time.

“This would be a lot easier if you just wore wigs,” Naomi hummed. You rolled your eyes. Her and her wigs. She was obsessed with wigs and sometimes you gave in to her requests, letting her give you whatever color and style she felt were appropriate for the moment. You wondered how the people of Azure would feel about having a Queen with Rose colored hair?

“No wigs today, what if he tries to run his hands through in front of the cameras? That’s mortifying,” You said.

“Wow, you’re going to let him touch you. Falling for him already,” She teased releasing another curl from the curling wand.

“No, no, no. I’m just saying that I won’t be embarrassed. Embarrassing my new family, well that’s fair game,” You smirked.

“If you see the wig I think it’ll change your mind,” She said standing up and showing you a long walnut toned wig with highlights. It already had large bombshell curls.

“We can try it out,” You agreed. “Prince Charming will have to keep his hands off.”


Tom played with the cufflinks on his suit as the staff prepared the finishing touches. The rest of his family was already out on the balcony addressing the press talking about how they were so glad this union was being formed or whatever. 

As much as his parents claimed this was about uniting kingdoms, he knew it was just a power move. The current king and queen didn’t give a shit about Cadiella, but with the beloved princess as queen of Azure, there would be less pushback from citizens. It may seem cutthroat but business was business, and giving more authority to Azure was endgame. They wouldn’t wipe Cadiella off the face of the earth, just make sure they were loyal to Azure and backed all their conquests. 

To be fair, Cadiella wasn’t the most innocent either. While Y/N’s parents did want to stop the tension between the two kingdoms they also figured having their daughter in a power position would give her some influence over the way the two kingdoms did business. As queen she could regulate trade as she wanted, giving Cadiella the opportunity to push their exports on Azure and have the best quality products from them in return.

Tom’s loyalty remained with his parents and his people. He would do whatever it takes to make his legacy favorable. Marrying Princess Y/N may not have been his choice but it couldn’t be so hard to make her see things his way. 

“Your Highness,” Lena, one of his mother’s assistants, spoke up. She stood on her toes and placed his crown on his head. 

He did one final look in the mirror. How could the princess not be putty in his hands? His Tom Ford suit hugged against his tight upper body; his golden crown complimented his soft brown eyes; his muscular hands were adorned with rings. 

“It’s time,” She said leading Tom to the grand entrance. The gilded doors opened and to reveal the crown prince. People were yelling and screaming for their lovely Prince Thomas. 

He smiled and waved in return, always able to turn on the charm. He took his place standing next to the rest of his family. The judgemental looks from his parents earlier were now replaced with fake smiles. The Queen gave her eldest a quick peck on the cheek.

“It’s finally time for our son to meet his betrothed after many years of anticipation,” She said enthusiastically. The crowd grew quiet with excitement. Everyone looked over at the other end of the balcony where the princess was supposed to make her first official entrance.

Once the doors opened the prince was slightly shocked. She looked stunning as she strutted in front of the crowd of people until she stopped right in front of Tom.

The two stood eye to eye as everyone watched with bated breath. They were both sizing each other up. He gently took her manicured hand before getting down on one knee. There was a collective gasp heard throughout the crowd. He took his free hand and popped open a ring box revealing the traditional Holland family engagement ring passed down from generation to generation. He slipped it onto her left ring finger and then brought the hand to his lips for a kiss.

“It’s finally nice to meet my Queen,” He said and the crowd went wild.


After the main ceremony, you and Tom went inside hand in hand. As soon as you were out of view from the public you both pulled away. Your families were out there interacting with the press, saying there would be more looks at the lovely couple later.

“You really poured it on thick there,” You commented folding your arms over your chest. You watched as he removed his crown and ran a hand through his curls.

“I mean we’re putting on a show darling. The people have to love us,” He chuckled as someone came up and took his crown to return it to its case. You handed over your crown as well. The maid scurried off, leaving you two alone again.

“Yes well, now we have to keep up the romantics,” You said smoothing out your dress.

“Good thing, I’m your real life Prince Charming,” He smirked. Before you could respond there was the sound of broken glass. You started to run towards the sound before you felt an arm around your waist. You quickly shoved your lovely fiance off. 

“What are you doing?” Has he lost his mind?

“You need to stay back, I’ll go handle it. You just go hide,” He said pointing you off in some direction.

You roll your eyes before continuing to head down the long corridor towards the noise. He let out a loud sigh before following behind you.

“The clicking of your heels is driving me insane,” He grumbled. 

“Oh really?” You asked playfully before purposely stomping your feet even more. 

The two of you made it to the source of the noise to find a broken glass window. He started to poke around the shards to try and see what caused it.

“Glad to know your security team is so attentive,” You grumbled looking around.

“Shush, no ones hurt are they?” He grumbled as he picked something up from the glass. A bullet. “Long distance range.” 

“I think we should get out of here,” You suggested slowly backing away. Before you could register what was happening Tom tackled you to the ground as another window broke. The two of you collided with the ground and you let out a scream. At your scream, someone ran in to find you two.

You saw a face that you’d only seen online, Prince Harrison Osterfield. From what you remembered he was your soon to be husbands partner in crime. He ran a hand through his hair, laughing at you two.

“Already sealed the deal?” He chuckled.

“What do you think we fucked against the window until it broke?” You scoffed. “You’re an actual idiot.”

“Woah no need to get testy, but I do know my best friend can be very persuasive,” He said gesturing to how disheveled you two looked. 

“We were shot at,” Tom said bluntly. “Hence the broken glass. And I couldn’t just let her die so that’s why we’re on the ground.”

You moved to stand up before letting out a hiss of pain. Some shards had gotten into your legs. “Dammit,” You groaned. 

“Harrison, find a maid and tell them to call a doctor,” Tom said getting up. “I’ll take her to her room.”


“Thanks,” You grumbled as Tom sat you down on your bed. You had tried to walk back, but that sort of failed so he just picked you up and carried you back.

“Couldn’t let you bleed out, would have been bad press,” He smirked, earning another eye roll from you.

“I feel loved,” You said sarcastically. 

“You know what this relationship is just as well as I do. We’re both here to make each other look good,” He said.

“Aw, I thought we were in love,” You fake pouted. 

The door swung open revealing both Queens. Your mom rushed over to your bedside looking at your legs. She was still in her ceremonial dress with her crown still fastened in her hair.

“My poor angel,” She said. “Someone get me some tweezers I’ll remove it myself.” You couldn’t help but smile, thinking about how she’d always patch you up as a child. She was always hands-on even though she could have always had nannies do the work for her. She was always there to kiss your boo-boos and sing lullabies.

“The doctor is on the way,” Tom said.

“Great, I still want some tweezers to help my child,” Your mother spoke now with more authority.

“Just go find some Thomas,” His mother spoke up. Tom sighed and went off to go find tweezers. “Do you think you can make it to the party?”

“You know, after almost dying I’m not really in the mood for it,” You say sarcastically.

Tom returned with a first aid kit. You gripped tightly into the sheets as your mom removed the pieces of glass. “OW!”

It took your mom about 3 minutes to remove all the glass. She then cleaned it with alcohol, which burned like a bitch but you knew better than to swear in front of your soon to be mother-in-law. Finally, she wrapped your wounds.

“Well, glad to know you’re alright,” Tom’s mother smiled.

“May I talk to you for a minute,” Your mother said gesturing to the hallway. The two shared a look before stepping out of the room. 

“What was that?” You asked once the door shut. Tom shrugged sitting down next to you. “Um, this is my bed.”

“In my house,” Tom brushed off pulling his phone out of his pocket. 

“Well, I’m a guest and guests should be given their privacy. So go,” You said shooing him away. He stayed put. “Hello…didn’t you he-” Before you could finish he slapped a hand over your mouth.

“Shh, I’m getting a headache,” He said. You narrowed your eyes and bit down on his hand. “Fuck!”


Your’s mom took the other Queen to an open sitting room and shutting the door behind them. 

“I thought the point of us coming so early was because Y/N was going to be protected,” Your mom argued. “Now they’re both being targeted.”

The Queen of Azure sighed taking a seat. “Look, we both knew there would be some pushback from our two kingdoms uniting.” She rubbed her temples. “No one was hurt, if Thomas wasn’t there she probably would have been dead already.”

“Why are you not panicked about this? Someone’s trying to kill our children,” Your mom said getting flustered. 

“It’s just a tool meant to scare us into backing out of this deal, which won’t happen. We’re going to be a powerhouse when united, and I don’t know how you do it in Cadiella but Azure does not bow down to threats. We fight. Your daughter is about to be our Queen and she better not crumble,” She said fiercely. 

“Y/N can handle anything. But what I won’t allow is for your people to blame her for whatever mess you’ve gotten Azure into.”

“I don’t know why we’re blaming my people when it was probably whoever came after your husband because of his poor leadership.”

Your mom froze, her hands slightly twitching. She stepped closer to the other Queen’s face.

“Don’t ever talk about him, again,” She said with a calm tone. “You know you should be grateful to him for all he did for you. If it wasn’t for him then we wouldn’t even have this arranged marriage because if it was up to me I’d never let my child marry a son of a bitch. But I will honor him and commit to the deal.”

Tom’s mother rolled her eyes. She was used to threats by now. “As long as Thomas and Y/N put up a united front for the public, we can handle the rest. They’ll be fine,” She assured. “Oh and don’t tell them anything we find out about this situation. They might get cold feet about their nuptials.”

“So I’m supposed to pretend like someone isn’t on the hunt for my child because she’s marrying our enemy?”

“See I knew you could keep up,” Tom’s mom said condescendingly. “If she’s anything like you then when she finds out she’ll rebel, which I will not tolerate. So it’s your job to keep the little princess happy and under your thumb.”

Your mom calmed herself down. “Fine, I’ll make sure she’s cooperative.”

“Great, now let’s get back to the happy couple,” His mom said making her way out of the sitting room and back to Y/N’s. The two Queens stood in the doorway to find you yelling at Tom while throwing pillows at him as he yelled, ducking your hits.

“So much for a united front,” Your mom grumbled. 

Some years after I first channeled the Jets to explain my Judaism, I had a conversation about religion with a devout Catholic friend. When I explained that I was an observant Jew and began each day by reciting the morning prayers but wasn’t really sure how God fit into my life, he was perplexed. When I admitted that these theological questions didn’t really occupy much of my attention and certainly weren’t particularly germane to my life as an observant Jew, he became agitated. And when I told him that I certainly wasn’t sure if Jewish law was divine or simply the result of two millennia of rabbinical interpretations, he threw up his hands and said: “How can you do everything you do, and live a life with so many restrictions and so many obligations, if you don’t even believe in God?”

I responded that there is a long tradition in Judaism of engaging first in religious practices and letting matters of faith come later. In the book of Exodus, after Moses has received the Commandments from God, he begins to instruct the Jewish people in the law; their immediate response is na’aseh v’nishma: “We will do first and understand afterwards.” I explained that while I understood that Catholicism, along with the other branches of Christianity, was essentially a religion based on the belief that Jesus is the son of God and the savior of humanity, Judaism is a complex blend of radical monotheism and peoplehood. In the Bible, the Jewish people are referred to not as a religious denomination, but asb’nai Yisrael, the children of Israel, the descendants of Jacob. Throughout history, Jews have referred to themselves as am Yisrael, the nation of Israel. The vast corpus of Jewish law, all 613 biblical commandments as well as the Oral Tradition, is a guide to how one lives a Jewish life as a member of the Jewish people.

And so for me, and I imagine for many others like me, the key to Jewish living is not our religious beliefs but our commitment to a set of practices and values that foster community and continuity.

—  Jay P. Lefkowitz, The Rise of Social Orthodoxy

anonymous asked:

If you're still taking drabble requests, could we possibly get some Tiz and Yew bonding? Maybe Yew asking for relationship advice lol? Thank you!

“…Sir, the truth is…I came to visit because I wanted to ask you advice.  It’s been some time since our journey, and, um…”  Yew started to redden and fidget, causing Tiz to raise his eyebrows.  Just what was this about?  “…In that time, Magnolia and I have grown close.  And I want to… I want to ask her to marry me!  So I came to talk to you.  How should I ask the question?”

Keep reading

“Hop, I still don’t understand why you’re so upset. Just try and take a deep breath, okay?” Joyce rests her hand on his, letting out a sigh. “It’s not like it’s an engagement ring.”

Hopper’s nostrils flare at the mention of it. “This still crosses a line, Joyce, and she needs to know it. I’m going to talk her-”

“Oh, you’re not going to make her take it off, are you?” Joyce grabs his arm and pulls him back to the kitchen table. “It’s a harmless piece of jewelry. Besides, I haven’t seen her this happy in a really long time. Well, up until you decided to yell at her.”

“I- I shouldn’t of yelled, I was wrong to do that, okay?”

“Oh?” Joyce face perks up in a smile, “are you admitting you have faults now ,Jim?”

“Maybe. But I still don’t see why we’re gonna let them get away with this. Neither of them are ready for it, they’re just too young.”

“Hopper,” Joyce sighs again, “It’s a promise ring. They’ve been dating for over a year now, he gets her jewelry all the time.”

“Yeah the necklaces and bracelets, that’s all fine, but it’s a ring, Joyce! And she came in wearing it on her left hand! A promise ring, doesn’t that mean they commit to the relationship forever?”

Shaking her head, Joyce rubs the back of Hopper’s neck. “No, no. I mean, usually, I think it’s something like that, Will told me the word promise has some special meaning to the two of them. I’m not really sure what it is, but it isn’t what you’re thinking.” As for walking into the house wearing the small silver band on her left hand, that made Joyce raise her eyebrow. El brushed it off as a mistake, that she simply didn’t know that was the tradition for engagement rings. Joyce knew that Mike and El were smarter than committing to a marriage while they were still in high school, but she had a clear memory of explaining the tradition to El when she married Hopper a year later.

“She’s only sixteen, Joyce. She shouldn’t be committing to anything! Especially not a boy!” Hopper was clenching his fists now, his head turned from Joyce. She tries to touch him, but he just distances himself further from her.

“I thought you liked Mike.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Hopper shrugged it off. “Wheeler’s a good kid, I just didn’t think he was this dumb. You don’t think he’s pressuring her into anything or-”

“No, Hop-” Joyce attempts to stop him, but he was already so upset and on a roll. She just had to let him work through it.

“I trusted that kid that he wouldn’t do anything to her or do something as dumb as misleading her and this counts as something Joyce, and if he tries to pull anything else I can personally arrange his funeral because Sarah is not going to-” He stops mid sentence, face flushed red and out of breath. The air between them was humid, the silence hanging in the heat. Joyce heard Hop swallow. Quickly he turned his face from her, wiping a tear she’d already seen.

“I-I” he stutters, eyes wide in shock, “I haven’t had slip like that in years.”

“Oh, Jim,” Joyce’s voice cracks and she swallows, blinking away hot tears of her own. “Is that what this is really about?”

Silence, then-“Watching her grow up is so hard, Joyce. It’s like the older she gets the closer I am to losing her. She only has two years left for school, and then she’ll move out for college, and you and I both know that promise ring isn’t going to stay a promise ring.” Tears were flowing down his red cheeks and slowly he let his head fall into his hands. “I just don’t know if I can lose another daughter.”

Something in Joyce broke. El hadn’t been Sarah’s replacement, but to Hopper she was a second chance. A chance to be better, to be there more often, to be the father El never had. But deep down his heart still ached at the remembrance of Sarah, at what he couldn’t do and what he couldn’t stop. Joyce wraps Hopper up in a hug, which was awkward as she was so much smaller than him. But Hopper’s sobs quiet, and Joyce lays her head gently on his shoulder.

“Jim,” she whispers, “Jim, it’s okay. It’s going to be okay. Yes she’s growing up but, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to lose her. No, no, please, please don’t think that.”

“I guess I’ve been preparing myself for this day, I just didn’t expect it’d be so soon.” sighs Hopper.

Joyce flat out whacks his shoulder for that. “Now listen to me, Hop, El looks up to you more than you know and loves you more than you think, and no ring from Mike is gonna change the fact that we’ll always be there for her if she needs us. And when she leaves us, she’ll always come back. It’s what she’s good at.”

Hop sniffs, but Joyce catches a glimpse of him smiling, if not laughing just a little. “You know you’re a lot better at this than me, Joyce.” With a real smile, he bumps her on the shoulder. “I got a second chance to be a parent and I almost blow it over something stupid.”

“Nonsense,” Joyce whacks his shoulder again. “You’re doing fine as a parent. What’s that thing that Lucas says when he’s trying to compliment someone? Oh, I just had it-”

“You’re the shit,” Hopper laughs, “He says you’re the shit.”

Joyce snorts, bringing an even bigger smile to Hopper’s face. “That’s right, that’s what he says. Well then, that’s what you are at parenting.”

“I’m the shit?”

“You’re the shit” Joyce nods, poking him in the shoulder.

Hopper lets out another sigh. “I should probably go talk to the kid. Tell her I didn’t mean it and that she can wear the ring, but on her right hand.” Standing up, he ruffles Joyce’s hair and begins to make his way back to El’s room.

“Hey Joyce,” he looks around the corner back at his wife. “You’re the shit, too.”

anonymous asked:

Saying that Sansa is not misogynistic or not a bully is the same as saying she did not mistreat Arya or tell her she should be more of a lady. You are just parsing words, it doesn't matter what you call it. You are still excusing Sansa's bad behavior and denying things that factually happened in canon.

Hey there Anon…

So not to be all ~well actually~ BUT, actually I think it really does matter what you call it. Think it matters a lot tbh. 

I am not going to get into the bullying thing because honestly at this point I am really uncomfortable with discussing it. But as far as the “misogynist” vs. “internalized misogyny” distinction, here are the definitions that I use when I am referring to those concepts…

Misogynist: Hatred of women. A person who dislikes, despises, or is strongly prejudiced against women. (x

Internalized Misogyny: When an individual enacts sexist actions and attitudes towards themselves and people of their own sex. (x) 

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

If Kant literally said it's okay to let someone murder your friend then why does anyone still read his books?

okay. this is a pretty reasonable question when you’re coming at philosophy from a new angle, so im gonna give it a nice detailed response. so, my main point would be one bad idea does not the philosopher discredit. just because something kant said sounds bizarre and useless in the real world, doesn’t mean that all of his ideas are straight garbo. so thats why people still read his books.

secondly, the theory of ethics and the place that this comes from is a very interesting one, and whether or not one agrees, participation with the other side of the argument is something crucial in philosophy - and this tradition of informed engagement with opposing ideals is something to be treasured. we need it now more than ever. the whole system of kantian ethics is fascinating and i wanted so badly for it to work but it just doesnt (if you ask me).

thirdly, ethics isnt all kant wrote about. he wrote a fucking shitton. jesus. theres so much kant about the place. and he has some fuckin brilliant ideas about the nature of metaphysics and the mind dependent world that are so crucial to engage with to broaden one’s understanding of philosophy even if you arent convinced.

finally, although the inquiring murderer is a whacked out and ridiculous example kantian ethics brings with it something completely novel to the field in its hardline logical basis. in the broadstrokes, as a life philosophy its also pretty nice. but, and allow me to reiterate this because its important, disagreeing with an idea or thinking its trash is absolutely no basis for not engaging with one of the greatest minds ever. people still read kant because his writing is intelligent, unique and relevant.

in many disciplines nowadays people have moved away from philosophy’s open dialogue, towards a position of engagement only with the arguments and facts that they already find palatable. like myson (occasional seven sage member/early greek philosopher depending on who you ask) said ‘we should not investigate facts by the light of arguments, but arguments by the light of facts; for the facts were not put together to fit the arguments, but the arguments to fit the facts.’, and i think this extends to investigating arguments in order to see if they measure up to the facts, if in fact it appears at first they dont. could be that you might read it, hear what kant has to say and be convinced. i mean probably not, but you wont know until you engage with it. sorry, this came off super preachy, but this is something im pretty passionate about. basically, read kant because its important. love conor xo

PSG Roundtable #9: Practicing Multiple Traditions

We’ll be talking about our perspectives on being someone who practices in multiple traditions.  Before I start, I want to make it clear that I’m coming at this with a series of biases.  I believe that:

  • The gods are separate, unique agents in and of themselves as individuals (hard polytheism);
  • Objects have, or can develop, their own spirits to varying degrees of animistic complexity;
  • Gods, guides, and spirits can communicate with us in a variety of ways
  • By its very nature, practicing in multiple traditions means acknowledging that no single tradition is the only “true” one;
  • My experiences are not reflective of everyone’s and what works for me and mine may not work for you and yours.  While I do have strong personal feelings on this subject, they’re still only my personal opinion.

I’m also approaching this as an Irish polytheist and Kemetic, among other things, who is part of an (offline) group of hard polytheists from various traditions of their own, including Bacchic Orphic, Gallo-Roman, Heathenry, and Santeria.

What does it mean to be “multi-trad” or practice in multiple traditions?

I use “tradition” to refer to any collection of beliefs and behaviors that is coherent and has a recognizable identity of what it means to be a part of that group.

To be multi-trad, then, is to be able to move between various traditions.  Think of a big, lovely house with a room for each faith tradition: when I’m in the Irish polytheist room, I follow its guidelines for interacting with the Tuatha Dé, leave votive offerings, celebrate the cross-quarter days, understand that words like ‘poetry’ and ‘satire’ have very different meanings in this context.  When I go to the Kemetic room, I might wake up the Netjeru in their statues and worship in specific “praise” postures, share in food and drink (and for me, maybe talk alchemy).  When I visit friends in the Santeria room, I change out of my default black to completely white clothes, greet the Orisha in a way very different from the Tuatha Dé and Netjeru, and try to keep up with a completely different etiquette and sense of hierarchy to show respect for the divine, dead, and living Santo communities.

Can I combine multiple practices?

In my personal opinion, combining multiple traditions into a single “one approach fits all” practice means losing the characteristics that empower those traditions as individual identities.  I mean, you could worship Brighid as a Triple Goddess of Maiden/Mother/Crone, but doing so means taking the Celtic tendency to triplify goddesses to emphasize power and turning it into something that misconstrues much of Brighid’s nature.  YMMV.

That doesn’t mean one practice won’t ever impact another.  Say it’s Samhain and I’m honoring the Morrígan; before beginning my rites for her, I might also acknowledge other deities with whom I share death-related work, like Anpu in his psychopompic aspect, and the spirit allies who help me handle the unhappy dead that come up through my work at the women’s center.  Or perhaps I’ll honor them all in separate rites, not because Samhain has anything to do with Anpu but because my own associations with Samhain overlap with my work with him and doing so doesn’t violate anyone’s etiquette.  In another instance, if you’re oathed to a deity and you agree to a task they give you, you might then turn around to your dead or your guiding spirits and say, “All right, troops, here’s the goal.  I’d like your help to get it done, please,” even if your dead or guides don’t come from that deity’s paradigm.

Can I have events, like rituals, for multiple traditions?

It’s definitely possible to have multi-trad events, but if you try that, you need to be careful that the different entities are getting what they need.  Make sure everyone gets an appropriate offering (within reason, of course - sometimes you have to negotiate, like, “Dude, you can’t have that whole bottle of $50 whiskey, how about a shot of Fireball instead?”) without someone feeling ignored because of another.  Don’t put the shrines of entities who don’t get along beside one another.   Make sure you share the Netjeru’s portion of food, but once you offer something to the Tuatha Dé, it’s theirs.  And so on.  It’s like…having a dinner party with finicky guests of wildly differing temperaments, complete with some cultural barriers.  It can be a lot of fun, especially if you have skillful mediums with you and/or dedicants who are knowledgeable in their respective paths, but it can be a lot of work.  I think it’s well worth it, but I know some people would disagree.

When my own group has multitrad events, we always make sure to have a shrine for each god or pantheon to which the humans have oaths or relationships and plenty of diverse offerings so we can provide proper hospitality for whomever chooses to show up.  We also put a huge emphasis on consent, both human and nonhuman, so we don’t assume who will or won’t be present and willing to work with us - we just make sure the ritual space is available.

If you decide to go the ritualistic route, the hardest part is making sure that your ‘ritual tech’ - that is, your methodology - doesn’t violate the rules of one of the traditions in question.  Some traditions aren’t very strict on some things, like perhaps your method of cleansing yourself spiritually, but there shouldn’t be actual conflict in ideology or application.  Divining for the input of the gods and spirits involved, and maybe asking the opinions of others with knowledge of them, can be invaluable.

How do I switch between the different paradigms?

I think it’s not unlike switching between different environments or groups of people.  When you’re at work, you behave a certain way according to your workplace’s guidelines; when you’re at school, you behave according to those rules.  Even with friends, you probably act one way with a particular group that’s different from how you act with another.  You wouldn’t behave the same way around your conservative grandparents as you do with your mates at the pub.  You’re not lying or ‘faking it’ in any of these scenarios: you’re adjusting your style of communication and behavior to match the requirements and expectations of your environment.  When you’re familiar with the rules, when you have solid relationships with those people, you can start bending those rules a bit and acting more familiar, just as you do with human people.

Does it always have to be so complicated?

Ha, nope.  The things that I do with my group are usually much more involved than what I do privately because there are more traditions being represented, but that also means there are more people present to share the physical and spiritual work.  I maintain only as many relationships as I feel is reasonable for me, my lifestyle, my resources, and my rather limited spoons.  I’d rather have deeper knowledge of a few traditions to make my practice feel that much richer and fulfilling for me than try to juggle many different ones (although having general knowledge is often useful).

But I do take these fewer relationships as seriously as I do human ones, and any kind of mutually beneficial, respectful, healthy relationship takes effort.

It’s too much work and research!

Many of us have busy lives: job(s), kids, schooling, and so on.  Some of us are limited by funds, spoons, or other factors out of our control.  But if your reason for not doing at least some research with the sources you have access to in order to have a baseline understanding of the paradigm from which a specific god is coming is just, “It’s too much work,” I don’t have much sympathy.  Isn’t the relationship you forge with a deity worth that extra effort, which can deepen and strengthen that relationship because of shared language and understanding?  This doesn’t mean you need to go back to school to have a scholar’s understanding, and the gods’ conception of time is different from ours; their sense of ‘hurry up’ is, I think, often very different from ours, and you can take the time you need.  Religion should fit into your life, not the other way around, but you do still have to do the work.

What are the benefits of all this work?

You’d have to ask other people, but for me, some things I’ve gotten out of this include:

  • Showing respect for the gods and spirits and developing deeper, more nuanced relationships because of it
  • Showing respect for the tradition’s ancestors and, if relevant, living culture
  • Enrichment of personal perspective, broadening of horizons, etc.
  • I mean seriously, the world is so weird and people and the gods are so amazing and complex and diverse, why wouldn’t you want to engage with them as they’ve revealed themselves to us rather than try pigeonholing them into something we think they should be?

Do I still need to think about cultural appropriation?

Yes.

Do I still need to be initiated into things?

If initiation is part of the tradition you’re choosing to engage in, then yes.  Hanging out with Santeros, for example, does not make me a Santera myself, nor does it mean I have access to the mysteries of the tradition.  I would still need to undergo the same training and rites that every other Santero in this tradition has had to do.  As it is, I’m perfectly happy just being an invited guest.  Going back to my Big House of Faith metaphor, some rooms have more locked cupboards and drawers than others: initiations are the means by which you earn the keys to unlock them.  There’s actually a lot to be said about initiations, but that should probably be saved for another post.

Here are the “multifaith practice” tag, the resource blog @thepaganstudygroupresourcepage, and our collected links on various traditions and kinds of information.

Now that I’ve talked at great length - do my fellow mods who practice multiple traditions have their own experiences that they’d like to share?

- mountain hound

I don’t have much to add since I think MH covered a lot of the main points. As for my own experiences, you need to know that your discernment may still mean fuck all. If their myths and legends paint them as never getting along (for example, Korean deities versus Greek, though there aren’t any actual myths about that) it’s very fair to assume that if your UPG is that they get along swimmingly and don’t mind you mixing up the two traditions, you’re probably skewing something here. 

Like MH, I make sure to keep my Kemetic shrine in its own space and my Mugyo shrine in its own space. Keep in mind that each tradition may have particular regulations and rules that simply cannot be mixed. Forcing it together is an amalgamation and has a very high risk of offending the gods of both pantheons.

Being properly initiated is a huge deal. No matter what you read or watch as an outsider or fringe-member, you’re kept in the dark about specific hows and whys to the things we do inside the tradition. You’re always going to be missing something, some key information. So if you are able to get initiated into the tradition that you’re vetted for, you should do so.

- trueriptide

The PSG Roundtable Index