toxic dreaming

You know what I really want? Joseph and Mary getting a divorce, but staying friends afterwards. I want Mary coming back to the house for family movie night and actually enjoying it. I want Joseph hiring a babysitter so he can go barhopping with Robert and Mary sometime. I want them to go on a family vacation, but sleep in seperate beds and split the bill at the end. I want them to take the kids out on the yacht, and when they aren’t wrangling the little boogers, talk about how their seperate lives are going.

They obviously enjoyed each other’s company at some point, considering that they got married in the first place, so why couldn’t they be that way again when they aren’t pressured by their relationship?

there is nothing more beautiful to me than a relationship portrayed on tv as something rooted purely in friendship and understanding and just a mutual respect of one another. Something where two people can always rely on each other, can make each other laugh, can be their best and worse selves around each other and not feel ashamed. Something healthy and realistic and honest and not depicted as an “epic true love” that is toxic and harmful and only ever requires sacrifice. there is absolutely nothing more beautiful than watching healthy relationships develop and grow and become even better.

I really give credit to those who change for the better, who realize their own negative or toxic way of thinking has prevented themselves from moving forward or has prevented others from realizing their own potentials. True confidence does not come from knocking down other people but by encouraging those people to strive to be better.

No matter what happened in the past, you can change. You can improve. You can be better than the person you were yesterday and you can make a difference in your life. The ball is in your court.

And remember your dreams are valid; don’t make anyone feel they have the right to keep you from soaring too high into the sun.

It’s your flight, if they were so concerned about you getting burned they would have giving you sun block before you ventured out into the unknown. Only insecure people will try to clip your wings, before you even had the chance to know how far you could fly.

—  Joanna Strafford
i arrive at the henrietta drag strip

dream battle: fought

matthew: saved

kavinsky: dead

i am forcibly removed from the drag strip

Killing a toxic co-workers hopes, dreams, and future.

Names changed for anonymity, happened a few years back. This is a long one so TL;DR at the bottom.

Background: I got a job working for a small hardware company. 4 people in the office, a few in the warehouse, and a delivery driver. Nothing fancy, but it got me off the night shift and onto a desk. The owner was a pretty nice guy, let’s call him Ray. Ray took over the family business in the early 2000s. Like most small business owners he was pretty frugal. The job came with absolutely zero perks. 10 vacation days that doubled as sick days, no insurance, everyone was hourly and Ray hated paying OT. He had one large customer that accounted for about half his business and everything after that was profit. He had gotten to the point where the business was doing well enough to support his comfortable life (10-3 schedule, 4 weeks vacation, season baseball tickets) and had zero interest in growing it beyond that point. But my problem was not with Ray, it was with the absolute b*tch in the purchasing department.

The players: Four people in the office meant that every part of this business fell to one of us. Ray was the owner, he negotiated large scale orders both with customers and suppliers. Sarah was our admin/receptionist, sweet as pie. I was in charge of order processing and logistics, and I did quite a bit of work revamping the company website. Ingrid (aka B*tch Supreme) handled small scale purchasing and most of the other customers.

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The elephant in the room is the one I’m not writing about. The toxic love I still think and dream about. The one whose name I’m so determined to keep out of this new journal as I’ve attempted with all the others and failed time by time. My dreams disturb me because it is always I who looks for his attention in them. I don’t know what I’m looking for. I don’t know what it is I think I need from him when all I need from him is peace and oblivion and space that extends for miles and miles
—  e.k.s.
It Used To Be

What we had, used to be love.

It used to be sweet, it used to be gentle.

I don’t know why I expected him to be able to hold back what he truly was for so long, but after a while, it slipped.

It all came crashing down.

Once gentle touches turned rough, they left bruises.

When we were alone, there was hate in his eyes.

“Demons don’t love like humans, Pine Tree.”

He put his hands on each side of my head and leaned in.

“I’ll love you until you shatter.”

I had this disturbing nightmare last night that there was this zombie-like virus that was killing teenage boys and young men in America. The way it worked was that it spread by touch. If a boy who was infected touched another boy– even though clothes– that boy would become instantly infected and, within an hour, either drop dead die or become a rapid mindless killing machine with bright orange eyes who would infect as many people as possible before dropping dead.

The plot thickens: women over the age of 30 were carriers. That meant that they couldn’t get sick themselves, but if they touched someone who was infected and then touched another teenage boy, that boy would get sick. Even a brush against the shoulder– or putting out a hand to stop an infected boy from getting close to their son– would mean they became carriers of the virus. Young women/girls were completely immune, and in the dream, scientists were still trying to figure out if older men could be carriers.

In the dream, I worked at this old castle-like mansion that was hosting a scavenger hunt/ sleepover for this summer camp full of teens, and the boys just kept dying or going into zombie mode. Of course, as soon as the news broke, all of their moms kept showing up to pick them up and wanting to take them home to keep them out of danger… which only kept spreading the infection. I was surrounded by these well-meaning moms who were all convinced that THEY couldn’t be carriers, despite it being quite well-documented that it was an almost 100% chance that they would be, trying to protect their sons and watching them die or turn into monsters in their arms.

It was scary. But it would also be hilarious if it was made into a campy horror movie called “TOXIC MASCULINITY.”

All this dream daddy discourse has me distraught because I have a terrible feeling the fandom is going to be ungodly toxic. It’s not even out yet and I’m cringing at everything,,,I can’t imagine how the team feels seeing all of this.

@ ddadds devs

Joseph and Mary’s marriage is quite toxic, and if continued would cause damage to them and their children’s mental health. Even if you don’t end up with Joseph at the end of the game, he shouldn’t go back to Mary and try to “work things out” because from an outside observer it looks like it’s not gonna work.

Even if Joseph and Mary manage to find a compromise, they’re just delaying the inevitable. Denial of a persons character in one half of the party is a sign of an emotionally abusive relationship, regardless of who is being affected, whether it be their kids or them. Joseph obviously needs time to himself, with or without the MC.

anonymous asked:

How about a Headcannon of meeting his s/o's toxic ex girl/boyfriend who mistreated Dadsona and his younger child? We need a protective alpha Hugo in our?

Sure thing anon!
WARNING: MENTION OF A PAST ABUSIVE/TOXIC RELATIONSHIP

I feel like Hugo is protective by nature. If he cares about someone he wants to make sure they feel comfortable and safe with him.

With this said I think how the scene would play out is Hugo, Dadsona, and Amanda are out on a day of shopping at the Mall or The Bayside. They enter a shop and Amanda is doing her own thing as Hugo and Dadsona are being dorks on the other side of the store. Suddenly Amanda runs over and pulls on Dadsona’s arm and motions behind her. “Pops…is that?..”

Dadsona looks and his face turns completely pale. It is him/she/them. Dadsona quickly turns to Hugo and tells him they have to leave now. Hugo is confused but he sees how scared Dadsona looks and how Amanda is clinging to Dadsona’s shirt like her life depended on it. She wont look him in the eye but Hugo sees her distress. “Please Hugo, ill tell you later..We just- we need to go!” The desperate plea in Dadsona’s voice is enough for Hugo and they leave. They walk for a moment and when they find a secluded bench they sit down. Amanda has tears in her eyes but she isnt cry. She’s a tough girl and wants to be strong in front of Dadsona. If not for herself then for them. She just sits there next to Dadsona, holding their hand and Dadsona explains to the best of his abilities why they had to leave. When Hugo hears the story he is enraged and sad and cant help but immediately pull the both of them into a large hug, kissing Dadsona’s head slowly, over and over until they some what have calmed down. It took a lot of courage for Dadsona to tell Hugo what happened and he will never forget the trust that they displayed towards him.

A few days would pass and Hugo and Dadsona would be out for dinner with Amanda, nothing fancy. Trivia? Movie? As they leave the area and walk down the street who appears in front of them but Dadsona’s ex. Everyone at first is stunned. Amanda grabs Dadsona’s hand and squeezes tightly. Dadsona talks a weary step closer to Hugo, not sure what to do or say. Hugo is completely calm. The ex scoffs and begins to degrade both Amanda and Dadsona with insults. Amanda really just wants to punch this them but Dadsona is frozen. He wants to move but his legs refuse to move. The ex continues horrible comments when Hugo very calmly steps forward.

“Do you think anyone really cares for your opinion (ex)? Are you so arrogant to think that Dadsona and Amanda even think about you enough that this pathetic excuse of catching-up even affects them? Go find something better to do like getting shit on by a bird“

Now Hugo would be professional, no threats given but his tone would be gruff, deep, and very stern. He would would look them directly in the eyes, maybe even take off his glasses. Before the ex can say anything Hugo wraps an arm around both Dadsona and Amanda and pushes past the ex and they never see them again.

No Dad Points for this one.

in this dream, i am not a wolf, you are not a hunter, we are not a violence that just keeps happening. my hands are never dry and your fists are never clenched and i don’t have to write poems about you to cope. no one comes hungry and no one leaves hurting. in this dream, we are more than an almost but less than an earthquake, we are something we’ve never imagined; we are happy. my hair is long and your mouth is softer, there is nothing to forgive each other for.
—  THE POET IMAGINES A BETTER ENDING, sarah kate o.