tough customers

3

This tough customer is Octo Samurai. He brandishes a gigantic roller, using it to dash the hopes of all those who dare approach. He’s got no time or patience for anyone who fakes the funk, and word has it that he is worshipped as a big bad boss by the Octarian rank-and-file troops. He enjoys working on his motorcycle in his spare time. On closer examination, it should be noted that he actually looks more like a sumo wrestler than a samurai, which is a little weird.

binky found out he has a peanut allergy and molly declared herself the bouncer of anyone who wants to sit with him at lunch so he doesn’t come in contact with peanuts oh my goodness

buster walks over to sit and she stands up, blocks him, and goes “hold up. you packin’ peanuts?” and checks his lunch out before she lets him sit down. bless this gang and how aggressively they care about each other

Don’t Marry For The Bacon

The Essex market town of Great Dunmow keeps alive a curious tradition: It awards a flitch of bacon (the whole side of a hog!) to any married couple who can swear, after a year and a day, that they have not regretted their marriage. Note the language: they can at no time in the past year have regretted marrying. Tough to do! The custom goes back to the 1200s and perhaps even earlier; Chaucer mentions it as a well-established tradition.

Sadly, almost no one gets the bacon. Records show that between 1444 and 1751 only six couples managed to win the Dunmow flitch. But the tradition lives on! Every leap year, you and your spouse can travel to great Dunmow, be cross-examined, and have your case decided by a jury.

So last week I took my ass to Harry Potter world and when you go into olivander’s (the wand shop plebs) they crowd everybody into this little room with an actor that carries out an example wand ceremony–this is because they couldn’t feasibly do it for everyone individually I would imagine

Right so I’m in here and this lady prowls the room going ‘I sense a great power here’ and my astral ass is like ‘haha it’s probably me given I’m an actual witch good joke self’

Meanwhile my friend standing to my right is like 'haha it’d be funny if it was Dusken since she’s an actual witch and all’

Actor lady about faces. Points in my direction. 'It’s you!’

My ass was dead inside. GOOD JOKE ASTRAL!!!

Anyway that was how I went through with the entire wand ceremony at Harry Potter world trying desperately to conceal don’t feel while my witchy friend laughed to herself and took burst photos. The end.

My top ten most powerful animated teens.

Rules:

1. I am not including any DC, Marvel, or (Japanese) Anime teens. This is purely from  cartoon origins. If I included anime and comics, it would be riddled with them

2. They must have super powers, a super powered weapon, or in some way shape or form give them abilities beyond human powers.

3. One per franchise.

4. To be considered a teen, they must be between the ages of 12 to 19 when we are introduced to them.

5. This will be from only shows I have seen, so if a character of yours isn’t on the list I am sorry.



10. Steven Universe

Steven is the youngest member of the crystal gems (biologically 14 years old)

He is half human and half gem. While he is not much of a fighter, he is by no means weak.

He has one of the best defensive capabilities that I have seen.

His bubble shield is able to survive a spaceship crash from orbit.

His weapon of choice is a shield, that has unique properties that we have yet fully seen

He is able to heal injuries and broken gems with his spit.

He has enhanced strength and is tough enough to be thrown around by giant monsters and powerful creatures without much issue.

But the most amazing part about steven is, he is still learning. Once he unlocks his full potential it is obvious that I will have to put him higher on the list.

9. Ladybug from Miraculous:Tales of Ladybug and Chat noir.

Marinette is the heroine of Paris known as Ladybug.

With enhanced strength, speed, and durability. She is one tough customer. Her yo-yo can extend to any length, the line is unbreakable (Able to hold down a freaking T-rex) and has the ability to purify akuma.

But her greatest ability seems to be “Lucky charm”

This deus ex Machina ability allows the girl to solve a problem by giving her a random  item, which she will use to defeat her opponent in an unorthodox way.

And of course the other ability of Miraculous healing, which fixes all of the destruction that happened during the battle.

I chose her over chat noir mainly due to her having the purification ability

aside from that, they are practically equal.

8. Star butterfly from Star vs the forces of evil

Star is a 14 year old girl who happens to be princess of the kingdom of mewni

who happens to hail from another dimension.

She is constantly battling monsters that want her wand.

While I have her very low on the list, she does have potential to one day be near the top 5 of this list.

Why you ask.

Because of her magic wand!

The exact amount of power she possesses is unknown. It definitely not something one dismisses. It is strong enough to conjure up an assortment of pain, can alter ones anatomy,and even cause untold destruction in the wrong hands.

It only gets more powerful, I hope to see what it is really capable of.


7. Randy Cunningham: RC9GN

This teen ninja is responsible for protecting norrisvile from monsters, robots, evil wizards, and more.

With an arsenal of weapons that range from sharp to deadly stealthy to just plain ridiculous. The guy has almost as many weapons as batman!

But of course, he also has enhanced senses, limited elemental powers such as the ninja air fist, the tengu fire ball and more.

He also has super strength, enhanced speed, agility, reflexes, the whole typical hero stuff.

But This guy has a few more tricks up his sleeves, giving him a slight edge over the previous entrees.

6. Jake long, From American dragon: Jake long

Being the magical protector of New york city

Jake long has the power of dragons

With senses enhanced by his dragon transformation.

His senses are head and shoulders above the competition.

He can fly over 200-300 mph,

Strong enough to live 5 to 25 tons

breathes fire (Both as a rapper (Jk), and as a dragon)

claws that can rip through steal.

durability that makes being knocked through a brick wall an “inconvenience”

This dragon is tough and hard to beat.

5. Danny Phantom:

“Yo Danny phantom he was just 14

his parents built a strange machine,

designed to view a world unseen.”

But then s*** happened, and Danny fenton is now Danny phantom, protector of Amity park.

Having a ton of abilities Danny is one tough foe.

He can over shadow people,

shoot ecto blasts,

create energy shields

turn invisible, and intangible

Strong enough to pick up a bus with ease.

can fly over 150 miles per hour.

has cryokinisis (Ice powers)

can replicate himself making himself 4x as deadly!

And of course his most powerful ability

the Ghostly wail.

His last resort shout is strong enough to devastate a city.

While it was close between him and Jake,

Danny has the upper hand in terms of powers

4. Korra from Legend of Korra.

The latest avatar is certainly something. (Aside from being amazingly beautiful and powerful)

The protector of the world.

This girl has fought spirits, benders, Giant robots! the whole shabang

She can manipulate, fire, earth, water and Air with ease.

She even picked up metal and spirit bending!

But her most powerful form is her Avatar state.

In this state, she is powerful enough to stop city destroying lasers, level armies, fight embodiments of chaos!.

This girl is a beast and I am giving her this spot because honestly, Very few can top this chick.

3. XJ9 or Jenny from my life is a teenage robot.

The robotic teen protector of Tremorton.

Jenny is a powerful robot that protects the city and the world from city destroying monsters, robots, aliens, and robot Aliens!

She has the strength of 1million and 70 men. Which Is tough to calculate, but it is known she can easily lift well over 100 tons with ease.

Fly at high speeds,

has a weapon arsenal so insane it could dwarf the fire power of most militaries!

Her titanium alloy body makes her tough enough to survive most attacks without much damage.

she is as smart as a super computer.

Has more types of visions then the man of steel himself.

Has destroyed Planet destroying meteors with only slight difficulty.

This girl is tougher then she looks.

2. Ben ten from ben ten, alien force, omniverse and etc.

A teenager with the powers of every alien in the known universe.

The omnitrix is by far one of the best weapons in the existence of the world.

Ben tennyson is a 16 year old kid who got the coolest gift in existence 

a watch that can turn him into any alien for about 10 minutes at a time (Unless plot says other wise or some sh*t says he needs longer then that).

If I were to describe all of his powers and abilities, 

It would take forever!

The kid just has all the powers!

If you can think of it, one of his aliens probably has it.

He is one of the two most broken heroes in cartoons.

but the question is.

Who is number one?

1. Rex Salazar from Generator rex.

Now I know what you are thinking.

“How can this guy top  Mr. All aliens ever?”

Well it is actually really simple.

He actually became a god for a short time.

Now before then, he probably would have been on par with korra.

Being able to turn any part of himself into a kick butt machine

technomancing

curing evo controlled living creatures.

enhanced durability and healing.

But what made this guy go beyond all of that was godhood.

He attained five meta-nanites that gave him god like powers.

Which he used to cure all of the evos. And after that he turned it off for good.

What makes him different from ben is, while Ben has a god like alien as well, ben is limited by two other beings that make it near impossible to do anything with it.

Rex had full control. This made him superior to ben.

That is why Rex is number one.

(let me know your thoughts on this. Did I miss any other cartoons?)

TO THE PEOPLE WHO KEEP INSISTING THAT SLINK IS NOT A CANON NONBINARY CHARACTER

Slink is introduced in an episode where they’re referred to as ‘he’ by a boy they’re hanging out with (who is no longer their friend) and Slink bullies Buster with that boy, but decides they don’t like doing that sort of thing. Shortly after the fallout with his friend, Slink transfers schools to Arthur’s and joins the Tough Customers, and I have yet to hear anyone gender them. Slink is seen topless in one episode & has a flat chest, but is gendered she/her in the Hebrew translation of the show, which implies there is not a definitive gender written down and known for Slink to the point where it’s confused even by staff! Also, in one episode, Muffy, when talking about The Tough Customers, describes Slink as “downright peculiar”… Another notable thing is it seems like aside from celeb cameos and some rare exceptions, only female Arthur characters have separately colored hair. You can go to the Arthur Wikia to find specific episode information on when Slink was introduced and when they joined The Tough Customers, as well as the source for Slink being gendered differently in different translations!

-quoted from my amazing friend Ava



SLINK IS CANON NONBINARY
SUCK IT BINARIST TRANSPHOBES

No Kissing

(I took a brief intermission from working on my main fic to do a one-shot; I’ve seen a few people lately craving Bechloe married domestic fluff, and I’ve been feeling the same way, so I couldn’t resist the urge!)


Locking up her studio for the night, Beca pockets the key and heads across the back yard to the house.  She comes in through the kitchen, finding it empty and silent this late in the evening.  Checking the clock, she feels a slight twinge of guilt when she sees it’s past eight.  Usually, despite the temptation of her equipment just a few steps away on the same property, she doesn’t allow herself to go back to work after dinner.  (Or rather, Chloe doesn’t allow her to go back to work after dinner.)  But with so many deadlines looming this week she’s had to make some exceptions.

She crosses the back hallway and peeks into the family room.  Chloe is nowhere in evidence, but their daughter, Violet, is sitting on the plush area rug in the middle of the room, clutching her favorite blanket, staring at the TV and absorbed in what looks like a car insurance commercial featuring a talking monkey.  

Beca steps quietly through the doorway and sneaks up closer, then crouches down a few feet behind her, still unnoticed.  “Boo,” she says, but in a soft voice so as not to actually scare her.

Keep reading

10

Jake and Peanut: Troublemakers Find Their Perfect Place

Jake and Peanut arrived at Farm Sanctuary not in a crate or a trailer, but tied down flat in the bed of an open pickup truck with bungee cords. A family with small children stated that they had found these two just wandering and brought them to us. The weeping of the children suggested a very different story, however — but seeing that they were being handled more like boxes than goats, we decided to take these boys off the family’s hands.

Just out of the pickup truck and their original home! The boys enjoy every day!

And as that first day progressed, we realized that there was likely a reason their original home was not working out. These two were clearly escape artists and also lovers of trouble. At the time of their arrival, we still had our animal hospital area in our original office/shelter building called “the white house,” with pens in the back that were more than four feet tall.  

Are they plotting their next move? Peanut telling a secret to brother Jake — and that secret seems to involve head-butting. 

And although the boys were just tiny baby pygmy crosses and very short, scaling that wall was no problem. What was a problem was their refusal to adhere to our ISO practices (we isolate all of our incoming animals from the general population until they are confirmed to be healthy, but Jake and Peanut were eager to meet new friends!). We would find them in the kitchen, in pens with chickens eating their food. Clearly, they needed a different setup!

Why do we live in this chicken barn again? 

So we moved them to an area set up for birds, with a wooden six-foot-tall fence around it. And although they did not escape, they ensured that the farm assistants had plenty to do — turning over the cans used to take out their soiled bedding, jumping on those cans in an attempt to jump over the taller fence, and butting their tools or the staffers themselves — they really kept everyone on their toes.

“Helping out” the farm assistants with their barn cleaning. Peanut is being particularly helpful in this shot.

Finally, after their quarantine period was over and they’d received a clean bill of health, the boys were ready to move to the big farm.

Keep reading