totally called this ages ago

Hinamori and Aizen fight over Shinji


As requested by anon. :)


Sometimes Bleach characters argue. Today, Hinamori and Aizen are going to argue about which one of them most deserves to be with Shinji!


Hinamori: I-I don’t know if I can do this…


Hinamori: My argument isn’t very strong…


Hinamori: All I have is the fact that…


Hinamori: HE ACTUALLY LIKES ME


Hinamori: I AM HIS BELOVED LIEUTENANT


Hinamori: AND I NEVER TURNED HIM AND HIS FRIENDS INTO HOLLOWS


Aizen: You are right, Hinamori. Your argument is very weak.


Aizen: It is true that you have never been even slightly evil towards Hirako.


Aizen: But that is very problem, isn’t? Hirako is a singularly twisted individual. He needs someone a little evil.


Hinamori: That must be a problem for you, then. Since you are very, very, very evil.


Aizen: Am I though?


Hinamori: YES


Aizen: I do things that are violent. I do things that those of lesser intellect cannot understand. But everything I do, is aimed at making the universe better.


Aizen: And Hirako is one of the few people who could understand that.


Aizen: Which is why he secretly loves me.


Hinamori: He tried to kill you.


Aizen: That’s how I know!


Hinamori:


Hinamori: No, see, people who like each other don’t try to kill each other.


Aizen: Normal people, maybe. Hirako isn’t normal.


Hinamori: Well, that is true. He has a tongue stud. He likes to insult people affectionately. He thinks writing backwards is cool.


Hinamori: But all that makes him, you know, a little quirky. Not stabbing-is-a-form-of-love deranged like you.


Hinamori: I mean, we can both agree that he likes Hiyori, right?


Hinamori: And he has never stabbed her. He protects her, argues with her, and gets very upset when YOU got her cut in half.


Aizen: Gin did that.


Hinamori: Uh-huh.


Hinamori: You’ve done nothing but hurt him. I really don’t understand why you think you have a shot here.


Aizen: Hirako and I have so much in common. We were both in Squad 5. We are both very intelligent and very twisted. We both have perception swords.


Aizen: Plus,there is just so much sexual tension between us.


Hinamori: No, see, you’re mixing up sexual tension and horrible soul-crushing evil again.


Hinamori: Compare the relationship between Hirako and me. We work well together. He’s the only person who, well, doesn’t treat me like a porcelain doll. We’re not too similar, but we have a lot in common.


Hinamori: Including being hurt by you.


Aizen: I think I see what you are saying, Hinamori.


Aizen: You are saying that a fight between you and me over Hirako is pointless.


Aizen: Because it is clearly an OT3 situation.


Hinamori: WHAT


Aizen: I am the glue that holds you and Hirako together.


Aizen: No! I am the Love Butterfly flitting between you!


Aizen: Everything is clear now!


Aizen: ….I mean, I totally called this. Like, ages ago.


Hinamori:


Hinamori: Captain Hirako was right.


Hinamori: Visiting you in prison has made me feel strangely better!

4

Whenever I’m near him, my heart beats fast. My words jumbled up. He must think I’m a freak. But he still smiled at me. He’s nice. Like an angel. I want to protect him but I can’t even get near him without appearing like a fool.

I saw him as usual today. He looked sad. He’s never sad. People around him are concerned but they are doing nothing about it! Do they really think asking him and patting him on the back will make him better??

I overheard.

“Did you see him today? Haha! He’s totally bothered by that hate letter! I should have called him fat ages ago! Now I don’t have to see that Jimin’s happy-problem-free smile. It irritates the hell out of me”

I was boiling with rage.

“17 YEAR OLD STUDENT FOUND DEAD AT  THE CORNER OF A PARKING LOT LAST NIGHT”

Jiminie won’t be sad anymore.