‘Get down!’ Owen yelled. Ianto dropped out of sight behind the railing on the gallery. The creature hit the brick wall, embedding itself an inch into the mortar, then flexing its body back and forth and using its wings to pull itself out. It hovered in mid-air for a moment, looking around for sources of heat. And it found Owen. One moment it was there, the next it was a blur, heading for his chest.
—  Slow Decay by Andy Lane (Torchwood Novels #3)
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Characters named Jack have no chill

Handsome Jack? Sociopathic dictator.

Jack Harkness? Screwed everyone ever.

Jack Sparrow? HA where to I start with this one

Jack Dawson? Reckless as FUCK

Jack Merridew? Set an island on fire.

Jack from Jack and the Beanstalk? Stole shit from a fuckin GIANT

name ONE character named Jack who has any chill

There are two types of shippers
  • Me: aw look how cute they are! There's so much fluff and adorable shit and I just love the little looks on their faces when they see each other assfghjklasdfghjkl
  • Also me: JUST FUCK EACH OTHER YOU LITTLE SHITS OR I'LL LOCK YOU BOTH IN A FUCKING SEX TORTURE DUNGEON