god i wanted a damien redemption so bad fuck!!!! my hopes slipping i want to believe but i cant! hes just a dickbag
honestly i feel it i wanted one too like i want to believe that he could learn to use his power without always being a manipulative asshole (like chloe, for example, who sometimes slips up or goes too far but who is still doing her best and is a good person) but like… he’s Awful
i also think that this, esp the new ep, really is the point of no return for a damien redemption arc (also i think we all kind of know that, in our hearts, even damien stans). like there is… no way an apology would ever be genuine now, there is no way anyone would trust him (excluding mark, but stockholm syndrome doesn’t count thx), there’s no way anyone would like him or want to spend time with him… the damage is irreversibly done. and he isn’t sorry! he was put on the opposite end of his own power imbalance and it didn’t make him feel any remorse at all. if anything, he was sorry he wasn’t able to be a manipulative asshole. and his reaction when he found out mark cares about him was not a reaction of a man who cared back, it was the reaction of someone who sees people as tools and toys, and interpersonal relationships as prizes to be won. damien likes it because he wants to be liked, without having to like anyone, he wants unconditional forgiveness… he’s power hungry and he genuinely believes he’s entitled to that power. that he’s entitled to control people and he’s entitled to positive attention from people without ever having done anything to earn that besides lie and manipulate.
and that’s… not a man with a redemption story. or at least, that’s not a man i want to see redeemed. it’s clear he has no good intentions now. he’s selfish, manipulative, and abusive, and uses his power and his past as a front and an excuse (as opposed to an explanation, which is what they are).
like. is he a nuanced character with layer and explanations who i actually find very interesting? hell yeah. earlier in the show before his personal motivations and intentions were this clear, did i and probably lots of other people hope for a redemption arc? hell yeah. do i want to see a man who doesn’t take no for an answer and abuses people get redeemed especially now that we know his intentions are and always have been wholly selfish and in pursuit of his own power? i sure the fuck do not
tl;dr same but i’m two steps ahead and i already gave up on the damien redemption arc and my new hope is to hear the sweet sweet sound of damien getting his ass kicked again
I can only imagine Camila singing a Camren song with her guitar. The feels!!! It's too much.😭
DUDE WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT… I’m drowning in my feels right now like imagine if that actually happened like she was performing and then lauren appears on stage and starts singing with her… damn I need to stop.. 😭
what she means:
John Laurens lived and died in a time when being gay was punishable by death. He died never knowing there was nothing wrong with who he was. He probably felt horrible about himself all the time, so no wonder he was incredibly reckless in battle. He couldn't be with the one person he loved and there was nothing he could do to change that. It was probably too painful for him to watch that person be with his wife and start a family, so Laurens made sure he was gone before he had to witness any of that, never knowing the hole he'd leave in that same man's heart; casting a darkness over the decades he had to endure without his best friend, until a bullet reunited them once again.
“I think you know immediately. As soon as your eyes… Then everything that happens from then on just proves that you have been right in that first moment. When you suddenly realize that you were incomplete and now you are whole…”
Now, let’s begin..
too much? ok ok..
“Just come back safe.”
Because since the first second they met, Lauren has ALWAYS been at Bo’s side. Everything she has done was to help her, protect her. Nobody’s perfect. But Lauren has always cared for Bo.
“Just come back. I love you.”
Because Lauren has seen the true Bo, her human soul, her strength, her heart. Lauren knows Bo, she knows how brave she is. And Bo can see that in her eyes. She sees her soul reflected in Lauren’s eyes. And thanks to Kenzi and Lauren, Bo has always been “protected” from the darkness within herself. And Lauren’s love for her has always brought her back from this darkness.
Love is what keeps her safe from the appeal of power. Love of her friends, her family.. Love of Lauren. And the darkness inside of Bo knows that, when it tries to take control, it knows that Lauren is in the way of its freedom. And I don’t talk about the succubus. I talk about the Pirrypus who tries to use Bo, to infuse anger, crave of strength, of power to her.
“You’re not a monster.- I know you.”
Bo is always afraid to be a monster. Afraid to not be able to take control. She ran from her past, she doesn’t want to kill anymore because of her powers. She’d prefer to die instead of taking a life. But Lauren has shown her another way. She gave her hope, she has teached her how to be herself without being afraid of who she was. Because Bo is not a monster. Since the first time they met, Lauren has told to Bo that she wasn’t a monster, that she was perfect.
When she loses hope, Bo finds strength and support and love from Lauren. Lauren is always here for Bo. And she knows that. She feels safe. Lauren is her harbor. (Eleanor, nope, go away)
“See you soon.”
Because Bo knows that she has something to fight for, someone to come back for. And it’s Lauren.
“You have to come back.” - “You’re gone. There’s nothing to come back for.”
And Lauren was and will always be here, waiting for Bo. Lauren knows that Bo has a great destiny to fulfill, she understood that, because she knows Bo, maybe better than herself. She sees the leader that Bo is and is becoming. She sees the “Queen”. And she’s here to support her, to give her confidence and tools to achieve her missions. She truly believes in Bo. With all her heart. Since the beginning.
Lauren tells Bo she has always believed in her, since the first time they met. ALWAYS. And Bo tells Lauren she has always knew that she has extraordinary, amazing. She has ALWAYS knew that Lauren was so much more than she lets see. It’s a declaration of love, of trust, of respect. Since the first time they met! It’s just a confirmation at the end. And at this moment, we all thought “we have ALWAYS knew this, since the first time you met!”
And yet, Bo is so afraid to lose Lauren. Because she means a lot. She means.. You know what Lauren means to Bo, c'mon. Don’t make me write it. I can’t.
It’s just.. I can’t .. this post.. too much feels
She didn’t want to leave Lauren behind. And Lauren reminded her about her mission, told her to go save Trick and kick the Garuda burning ass.
you can see the tears in Bo’s eyes, like if her heart was crying. Stop that. I don’t have enough coffee in my blood.
Well, if you can’t see the love. The evidence of this. Of them. I don’t know what to do.. to say. Of course, you have the freedom to remain blind u_u" xD
But… Let’s be honest :
I own nothing except the words in this post, and the crazy thoughts.