too many tears

There are the jokes about women, about wives, about mothers, about raising daughters, about female bosses. They are told in my presence by men who are meant to care about me, just to get a rise out of me, as though I am meant to find funny a reminder of my second-class status. I am meant to ignore that this is a bullying tactic, that the men telling these jokes derive their amusement specifically from knowing they upset me, piss me off, hurt me. They tell them and I can laugh, and they can thus feel superior, or I can not laugh, and they can thus feel superior. Heads they win, tails I lose. 

There are the occasions that men—intellectual men, clever men, engaged men—insist on playing devil’s advocate, desirous of a debate on some aspect of feminist theory or reproductive rights or some other subject generally filed under the heading: Women’s Issues. These intellectual, clever, engaged men want to endlessly probe my argument for weaknesses, want to wrestle over details, want to argue just for fun—and they wonder, these intellectual, clever, engaged men, why my voice keeps raising and why my face is flushed and why, after an hour of fighting my corner, hot tears burn the corners of my eyes. Why do you have to take this stuff so personally? ask the intellectual, clever, and engaged men, who have never considered that the content of the abstract exercise that’s so much fun for them is the stuff of my life.

the-queen-of-kingss asked:

"If you beat me to the other side...wait for me." [With Kal because I'm so mean ;u; <3]

There had been too many Hive.  They hadn’t been quick enough.  They had tried.  They had tried to hold them off while the rest of the soldiers escaped…

There had been too many.

Tears flowed down Laine’s face, mixing with blood and sweat.  Her breathing was labored, raspy.  She was sure something had punctured a lung.  If she tilted her head she could see her mangled legs, twisted in strange directions with shards of bone jutting out everywhere.  And an ever growing pool of glowing red blood.

She was grateful, in that moment, that she couldn’t feel anything from the waist down.

A sob escaped her, pain wracking through her chest.  A weak, blood covered hand reached out to touch Kal’s cheek, her glowing eyes meeting his.  A glow that was fading with every waking moment.  She could hear how he was struggling for breath.  Glowing blood flowed from multiple wounds, the most severe on his abdomen.  

Blue glowing blood pooled around his body, mixing with her own glowing red blood.  It was a strangely beautiful sight.

She cried.  She couldn’t help it.  It wasn’t supposed to end this way.  They were supposed to grow old together, see their children have children, see peace between their peoples…

“Of course…” Laine managed out. Blackness began to encroach on her vision. “Of course, v-viishah...”

She tasted blood in her mouth.  Kal’s image grew more blurry, the darkness grew to envelop more and more of her vision…

“I-I l-lov-”

Darkness.

“Just like every person who works for Dortmund is a fan of the club, it was the same at Mainz. When I was a player there we had 800 supporters on rainy Saturday afternoons and if we died no one would notice or come to our funeral. But we loved the club and we have this same feeling at Dortmund. It’s a very special club – a workers’ club.”

Klopp is canny enough to evoke these romantic roots when, speaking in English with real fervour, he says: “I left Mainz after 18 years and thought: ‘Next time I will work with a little less of my heart.’ I said that because we all cried for a week. The city gave us a goodbye party and it lasted a week. For a normal person that emotion is too much. I thought it’s not healthy to work like this. But after one week at Dortmund it was the same situation. To find this twice, to be hit by good fortune, is very unusual.”

“Bayern want a decade of success like Barça. That’s OK if you have the money because it increases the possibility of success. But it’s not guaranteed. We are not a supermarket but they want our players because they know we cannot pay them the same money. It could not be our way to do things like Real and Bayern and not think about taxes – and let the next generation pick up our problems. We need to work seriously and sensibly. We have this amount of money so we can pay that amount. But we lose players. Last year it was Shinji Kagawa."He hits his head with his palm. ”Shinji Kagawa is one of the best players in the world and he now plays 20 minutes at Manchester United – on the left wing! My heart breaks. Really, I have tears in my eyes. Central midfield is Shinji’s best role. He’s an offensive midfielder with one of the best noses for goal I ever saw. But for most Japanese people it means more to play for Man United than Dortmund. We cried for 20 minutes, in each others’ arms, when he left.

His laughter dies and he looks suddenly stricken when I ask about his shock after he heard Götze would be gone this summer. “It was like a heart attack. It was one day after Málaga [whom Dortmund beat with two desperately late goals in the quarter-final]. I had one day to celebrate and then somebody thought: 'Enough, go back down on the floor.’ At our training ground Michael Zorc [the general manager] walked in like somebody had died. He said: 'I have to tell you something. It’s possible that …’”

Klopp can’t bring himself to repeat the words. “Michael asked if I wanted to talk and I said: 'No, I have to go.’ That evening my wife was waiting because there’s a very good German actor, and a good friend, Wotan Wilke Möhring, in a new film in Essen and we were invited to the premiere. But I walked in and told her: 'No chance. I cannot speak. It’s not possible to take me out tonight.’ There were all these calls from the club – we should meet in a restaurant and speak. I said: 'No, I have to be on my own.’ Tomorrow I’ll be back in the race – but not tonight.”

Some Dortmund players were so affected they could not sleep after hearing Götze’s news. “That’s the truth,” Klopp concedes. “I called six or seven players who I knew were damaged in the heart. They thought they were not good enough – and they wanted to win together. That’s the reason it hurt them so much. But Bayern told Mario: 'It’s now or never.’ I told him they will come next year. They will come in two years, and then three years. But he’s 20 and he thought: 'I must go.’ I know how difficult it will be to find a player to replace Götze but, next year, we will play differently. It just takes time.”

Too many tears
  • Too many tears
  • Suzy (miss A)
  • Me too, flower (ost)
Play

Too many tears - Suzy

I have a weak heart - I get really lonely too
Sometimes, I cry by myself too
Because I’m a fool, I only know one thing
Even though I know how to give love, I don’t know how to throw it away

I have many thorns so I have a lot of scars
Can you still hug me, who is like this?
I want to lean against you in your embrace
I want to believe in my love that I kept throwing away, once again

* Because I have many tears, because I fear love
I can’t take a step toward you although you are in front of me
If you really love me, run to me and hug me
I can’t see because I have many tears

I have many secrets, so there are a lot of lies too
Even if I’m this way, do you understand?
I want to erase, I want to turn it back
I want to forget the past love that deceived and deceived me, once again

The wind is blowing and I softly close my eyes
I feel your fragrance
Where are you? Are you looking at me?
I want it - I want you

Because tears overflow, because my fear for love overflows
I don’t recognize you although you’re right in front of me
If you really love me, run to me and hug me
I can’t see because I have many tears
With your hands, wipe away my tears

I’ve spent too many tears on someone who wouldn’t even bother to dry them.

I’ve spent too much time on someone who will never come back.

—  Too much (s.s)