too many songs use 'love' in a way that doesn't fit

You know what? Fuck it. I’m sick of sitting passively by, listening to people ask “how do you know if you’ve never tried?” and tell me that no-one cares while you sit there with a shit-eating grin and say “this is a great debate we should do this more often”. A debate? My sexuality is a debate?! Fuck you. Telling me that I bring up great points when I’m giving you facts and you ask stupid fucking questions that I hear all the time is not a debate. It’s a chore.

And how DARE you? How dare you say to me that I need to be fixed, that I can be cured if only I could “find the right somebody”. “How do you know if you’ve never tried?” you ask me as though I haven’t tried. You assume I haven’t?

I destroyed great friendships because I tried to convince myself I had a crush on them. I tore myself apart in so many ways because I tried to tell myself that there was someone out there just for me. My life has been a living hell because I TRIED. Every goddamn fucking day, I’ve tried. And then you ask why I’m angry??

Fuck you. Of course I’m angry!! I’ve been sold this idea of love and romance and sex being the be all and end all of the universe every goddamn day of my life. Every single fucking thing I’ve watched, read, listened to - about him or about her. About how True Love saves the day. How they only live happily ever after when they’re married and riding off into the sunset staring longingly into each other’s eyes. And then I’m forced to endure sex scenes and romances that are so out of place that it jars me out of the narrative so utterly and completely while everyone else applauds and nods and agrees “Yes, they are so in love”. Then they point at a background character who hasn’t even got a goDDAMN FUCKING NAME and tell me “Look! There’s your representation! Be happy!!!” all the while writing fanfiction about that character passionately fucking another character because #OTP #loveislove

FUCK. YOU. Of course I’m going to be absolutely fucking livid! You give me representation and then take it away all in the same breath! I watch as characters who are asexual are cured of their medical condition and suddenly they are not asexual anymore! I watch as characters that have never expressed any interest in romance - who have been around 60, 70, over 100 fucking years!!! - are paired off in heterosexual relationships (as though there aren’t enough of them around). Characters who are made canonically asexual and then a couple of years later, a new writer doesn’t agree with that and rewrites the entire canon so the audience can relate to them more (as though they weren’t a fan favourite already). Characters who are made the butt of jokes, characters who are placed in the same bracket as incest, characters who we are very clearly meant to hate.

And if the canon doesn’t fuck them over, the fandom sure fucking does.

Pages and pages and pages of fanart and fanfiction all dedicated to shipping my representation with other characters, while I’m shoved aside and told “it doesn’t matter. It’s not a big deal, there’s no need to yell”.

No need to yell? And yet you’ll start entire so-called ‘fandom wars’ over Shiro/Keith and Keith/Lance? You’ll yell and get angry and start a riot when gay characters are made straight and I’m not allowed to do the same for asexual characters? How DARE you.

How very fucking dare you?

I am made to endure and put up with all this shit and then - on top of all of that - then you have the audacity to tell us we are not welcome in your safe spaces, that we don’t exist, that we’re seeking attention (because bringing attention to a sexuality is such a bad thing, right?). I have to sit and listen to you as you describe us as aliens - as emotionless, unfeeling robots. You tell us we are as far removed from human as you can get. I have been told that I’m not right, I’m broken, I’ll never be understood and nor should I be. I spent years telling myself those very same things before I even came across the word asexual, piling on depression and anxiety and loneliness. I don’t need someone who doesn’t even take the time to try to understand to tell me that I must have a medical condition or that I was sexually abused as a child or that I just need to “give it a chance”. I don’t need people telling me that “it sucks” that I’m aroace, that I’m “not normal”, or asking me what I’ll do when I’m old and have no-one to look after me. I don’t need it. I don’t.

I’m already told all this in a hundred thousand different ways every day when I walk outside and see a billboard featuring another ‘sex sells’ advert. Every day, when I watch TV and see yet another out of place romance. Every day, when I walk into a shop and a love song is playing over the speakers.

Fuck you.

“How do you know if you’ve never tried?” How do YOU know?

I’ve had people ask me “isn’t it lonely?” They ask me how I’ll ever feel fulfilled if I never experience love and when I point at my friends, they laugh and say “no, I mean romantically” as if the way I love isn’t valid. Why is romance so much more fulfilling than platonic? “It just is,” they’ll reply as though that explains everything. It doesn’t.

They tell me how love is so amazing and great and then in the next sentence moan about their significant other or cry about how heartbroken, how depressed they are because their boyfriend/girlfriend broke up with them. “I’ll never love anyone ever again, I guess that makes me asexual” they say as they chat up their next partner and I grit my teeth and smile and nod because I’ll never understand so how can I judge?

So fuck you. I’m not going to just sit here and let you tell me that my representation doesn’t matter. Not when it took me 17 years to finally find asexuality. Not when it took others far longer. And definitely not when some go their whole life feeling broken or force themselves to do things they don’t want to just to try to fit in. We exist whether you understand us or not and we need our representation too.

anonymous asked:

What do you think of the idea that Megalovania is Chara's battle theme rather than Sans? I

(undertale spoilers)

there’s something that makes me question it in a big way, and that something is the existence of the unused track, song that might play when you fight sans. it contains elements of sans’ and papyrus’ themes, among other things. although it may have been intended for a neutral route battle, the fact is that sans was always intended to have his own battle theme. not to mention the fact that every other boss has their own unique battle theme connected to them. 

of course, megalovania has been used before, including an earthbound hack. so the name itself is probably not enough to give it away in any case. but if we focus on the name alone, we find something interesting. the song name could refer to the word megalomaniac - a person obsessed with the exercise of power, especially in the domination of others. that description doesn’t fit sans, which is fine because the song wasn’t originally made for sans.

so who in this game is a megalomaniac? the most likely candidate is chara. 

as the player runs through genocide and chara grows stronger, chara makes sure the player eradicated everyone. when the player tries to leave waterfall to fight undyne, if the player has not eliminated the quota of monsters, chara will notify the player of this and suggest to not leave yet. 

at the end of genocide, chara implies the player was never in control, that chara is the one in power. chara very well fits the description of megalomania. even if they aren’t happy with multiple genocide runs (”i cannot understand these feelings any more”), they take the effort to keep track of how many enemies are left to kill regardless.

but chara isn’t the only megalomaniac. the player is one, too. in a genocide run, the player is destroying everyone because they can. after all, the player is trying to prove they can beat genocide, and in many cases specifically sans. they exercise this power to dominate and beat the game. what else is a player trying to prove when they go after sans again and again?

however, this is only speculation driven by the meaning of the name. and the song existed long before undertale was created. it is possible that toby just decided to use this song as sans’ battle theme because of how amazing it is. 

personally, i like to think of once upon a time as chara’s theme, considering it plays while showing their journey in the intro. since chara is connected to everything in undertale, and elements of once upon a time can be found in many themes, it makes some sense. the idea also makes hopes and dreams seem a little more emotional – it wouldn’t just be asriel’s theme, but chara’s, too.

anonymous asked:

I just saw a post going around about a girl who made a song about Niall, called "boyband", that was initially believed to be about Harry. It's not a very flattering song. I know that doesn't necessarily mean anything, but I've heard quite a few rumours that Niall is sexist and objectifies women and this song reminded me of them. I really like Niall, and I get so sad for having these doubts about who he really is, but sexism is something even my educated, open minded male friends reproduce :(

I saw that post and I think it makes many logical errors.  I don’t agree with the conclusion the OP came to at all and I think it should be treated as an unsubstantiated rumor.  

It’s no more likely to be true than any of the girls that claimed to have slept with Zayn or Harry.  It’s not necessarily more true than the songs Taylor Swift writes about her “relationships” or than Ed Sheeran’s “Don’t” was.

I think the rumors about Niall objectifying women are likely either misunderstandings, outright lies for attention, planted, or caused by the fandom attitude towards Niall resulting from the smear campaign (more subtle, yes, but still a smear campaign) that 1DHQ has been running against him for years.

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