too many feelings about this ship

anonymous asked:

After Ep.2 I don't really know how to feel about Jonsa. I don't know if Ep.2 gave us anything to hold on to especially with people saying the scenes between Jonsa were all platonic. I am starting to question myself if Jonsa has any hope of being endgame. I am so sad that we won't see them together for a long time and all we got was that crappy wave as goodbye. I seriously do not know how to feel anymore. How should I deal with all these emotions? How do I keep my faith in this ship? Please help!

Hi Anon, 

I just wrote a post addressing all your concerns. It’s here.

Read it. Tell me what you feel after. 

And truly, keeping faith in a ship is really up to you. I do understand that many found this episode a little disappointing because, we’re expecting too much from it. I think somebody coined a great term. It’s called ‘Demotional’. You’re emotional about a ship but still detached from it. Detached yet emotional, Demotional. It’s a great way to ship characters that are not yet endgame. You’ll enjoy it better. I hope I’m making sense. 

Thanks a lot for the ask!! 

anonymous asked:

crosshairs x lockdown

SEND ME A SHIP AND I’LL DO THIS THING

{{MTMTE LOCKDOWN}}The ship is my: DUDE I REALLY LOVE THIS SHIP SO MUCH LIKE JNGRNGLKNK GOD WITH MY FRIEND’S LOCKIE IM LOVE THOSE TOW SO MUCH I CRI
I consider this ship’s feelings: Mutual | Mixed | Strange | Awkward | Platonic | Sibling-like | One-sided | They don’t really like each other |

I’d consider the relationship: Healthy | Awkward | Abusive | Doesn’t work properly | They’d never get together | SURPRISINGLY THEY’RE RATHER GOOD TO EACH OTHER

Children: No | Yes | They’d think about it :: God Lockdown wants so many kids

General Opinion: Okay but honestly i love this ship alot like… a lil too much. I didn’t expect for anything to happen between lockdown and Crosshairs, but I’m dying internally from how cute they can get in just a click of a finger. They’re such a power couple and oh my god they would be great fighting with each other. Please don’t let these two be in the same room. I’m sorry, i could go on about @thatspikybastard ‘s lockdown being such a great lockdown. But you have to thank them or me being more Crosslock trash.

{{ Bayverse}}

The ship is my: my guilty pleasure. It’d be really problematic but it’s a really good ship that i like

I consider this ship’s feelings: Mutual | Mixed | Strange | Awkward | Platonic | Sibling-like | One-sided | They don’t really like each other |

I’d consider the relationship: Healthy | Awkward | Abusive | Doesn’t work properly | They’d never get together |

Children: No | Yes | They’d think about it {{ Cross wouldn’t have a child with Lockdown.}}

General Opinion: As much as i love this ship and how completely deadly these two would be. I can tell Lockdown would be incredibly controlling. Especially over Crosshairs being an Autobot. Cross is still pissed that Lockdown helped humans to kill Leadfoot. Constant arguing, fighting and a lot of shooting. there would be alot i would like to explore with this ship. But i dont want to continue the “hes a bad guy he must obviously be an abusive person in a relationship”  cliche NAH. don’t mind me this is just a headcanon or something. I DONT KNOW. But Cross would probably rely on Lockdown for maybe protection or something of a government card if he continued to work with humans. MIXED FEELINGS OKAY

Why do I always get more gratification from ships that go from “I fucking loathe you” to “hey maybe they’re not so bad I guess they have some redeeming qualities” to “holy shit this is my person” more than regular ships why is this trope so appealing to me

2

I hate the way you talk to me,

and the way you cut your hair.

I hate the way you drive my car.

I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big dumb combat boots,

and the way you read my mind.

I hate you so much it makes me sick;

it even makes me rhyme.

I hate it, I hate the way you’re always right.

I hate it when you lie.

I hate it when you make me laugh,

even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it when you’re not around,

and the fact that you didn’t call.

But mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you.

Not even close,

not even a little bit,

not even at all.

-10 things I hate about you-

Guys help I’m emotional

So I wrote a thing- Its a Langst thing.

It isnt finished and its just in the ‘summarize’ stage but… I dont know if I should expand on it?

Read it under the cut if you wantttt

Keep reading

Why I LOVED the Fairy Tail Ending:

The fact that Mashima took the time to allude the very beginnings, middles, and the continuation of their relationship made perfect sense to me. He dragged her away, in the very same way he dragged her (literally) back to Fairy Tail THREE TIMES (now four), and told her they’d always be together. 

I’ve stated millions of times that the reason I love Fairy Tail, and all stories, is that everything is up to the reader’s interpretation unless explicitly noted. The statement “We’ll always be together” means different things each person, and I feel it suits their relationship. No matter what Natsu, Happy, and Lucy will always be together. To exclude Happy would be one of the worst things Mashima could do, he’s as a part of their family as Lucy is. 

I loved the ending of Fairy Tail because Nalu wasn’t overly forced. The ending wasn’t a cliche kiss or wedding (and I am the queen of loving cliches don’t get me wrong), but it was so NALU. To expect Natsu to suddenly be making out and having babies with Lucy would be completely out of character for him (and out of character for Lucy to be honest. She comes off experienced and totally all about it, but I see through her facade). Romance isn’t all about kisses, getting married, and having children. Sometimes it’s the little things, instead of the big things, that the author sprinkles throughout the series that make the ship what it is. We’ve all made lists about our favorite Nalu moments, and why we love them, and it’s very clear that those should still all be taken into account despite how upset many of you are about the ending. (I’m not going to share all of these moments because this post is already getting too long)

A house isn’t just four walls and one room. It’s got to have a firm foundation to build upon, otherwise it will ultimately fail and collapse. Despite how long this series has been going on, I feel that Mashima leaving this as an open ending was his way of setting the foundation for their future relationship. By this I mean this first series for Fairy Tail in general, and their series of moments throughout the series. 

My final thoughts on this: Mashima himself tweeted awhile ago that he still had various projects in the works for Fairy Tail after this main story ends. This would include the continuation of the anime in 2018 I would assume, and whatever else it includes is still up in the air. So while many questions may still seem unanswered right now, the fact that he left it as an open ending is actually to his benefit. It leaves him with more space to grow and continue the series if wishes to in the future. 

I will end this post with my way of saying a big THANK YOU!! to not only Hiro Mashima for providing a wonderful story, but to everyone who has included me so kindly in this fandom. I have appreciated every single one of you, and I will continue to contribute as much as I can to the fandom even though the series is technically over. Have an absolutely beautiful day <3

Okay...first of all, i shouldn't have to even start talking about this 🙄😒

The Voltron fandom for the longest time have been way too toxic

with all the damn extra antis
and the shaladin supporters giving backlash in defense

no
this is toooo much


and now you’re including @bext-k and @joshkeaton ????

what is wrong with all of you??

not only are you harassing them

OVER CARTOON CHARACTERS

PEOPLE WHO ARE DRAWN BY HAND ON A COMPUTER

AND ARE ANIMATED

FOR A SOURCE OF ENTERTAINMENT

YOU’RE ALSO HARASSING PEOPLE WHO HAVE DIFFERENT OPINIONS THAN YOU

oh all of you are so quick to stand up to racism and sexism, discourse based on horrible opinions

but no
if someone has a completely different opinion than you on something as small as a non-canon relationship

“oh no, i don’t give a shit about how this makes you feel. what i’m saying is right. shiros a pedo !!!;!;; i’m so smart !!!.! you’re a pedo too for shipping it ?!!?:!:”

just
just stop okay?


this is idiotic and childish

you have no idea how many good people have felt the need to leave and just block themselves from something they loved because of antis stupid actions and words

i don’t care about who ships who
or who’s in that ship

because guess what?

IT DOENST MATTER 😮🙄

!!!!!!

SURPRISE 🙃👏🏻👏🏻

I know.

Can we take a second to talk about the I love you. I know. interchange in Empire?

I get in a lot of arguments with my guy friends about this. Bless them - I mean really - because they think they are being progressive. And its actually kind of heart warming to see. But, usually, the people who think Han is an asshole for saying I know instead of I love you, too chalk his behavior up to some kind of toxic masculinity. Han won’t say he loves her because he refuses to be vulnerable. Han is too arrogant to admit he has a weakness. Han is aggressive. Han is downright cruel at times. 

And… okay. I guess I can see where they’re coming from. But, to me, that is a really shallow interpretation of his character. 

I guess what I, and I think many people who ship Han/Leia, see in that interchange is that Han’s response isn’t motivated by his own feelings. His response has nothing to do with what’s he’s thinking or how he feels. 

It’s about validating how Leia feels. 

Which, honesty, I think she needed more at that moment than a mirrored declaration. 

Leia sacrifices everything for the cause. Her strength to put the rebellion before her personal interest is incredible. It’s her defining characteristic. It’s what we all know and love about her.

It’s also what she knows and loves about herself. By Empire, Leia has lost almost everything of any personal value to her. She’s lost her family. Her home. Her friends. Her position in the Senate. All she has is her own sense of identity. The only thing she can use to define herself anymore is her core values. 

Can you imagine how difficult it would be to let anything compromise that? 

Admitting that she has feelings for Han would be admitting that she has room in her heart for anything other than the cause. It would be admitting that her life is not solely defined by the rebellion that her family died for. It would be admitting that behind her emotionless, rational, militaristic persona is actually just a twenty-two year old girl with feelings, longings, and desires that are entirely selfish. 

Han knows this about her. 

Ultimately, it’s why Leia loves him. Because even Luke, her own twin with whom she shares a connection in the force, at times fails to see her as anything other than the princess. 

But somehow this dirty, cocky, smart ass, nerf herder is the one person who has ever managed to look into her soul and see past every single wall she has built around herself. 

Han knows her. She has never had to tell him anything. She has never had to pour her heart out to him. She has never had to make herself vulnerable in front of him. And yet, he still knows. 

I guess many people see that scene and they see a cocky smart ass being clever and evasive instead of sincere when he says I know

But that’s not what his eyes say. 

His eyes say…

I know you love me. 

I’ve known you love me for a long time. 

It hasn’t scared me away. 

It hasn’t made me think less of you. 

It hasn’t made me see you as weak. 

You’ve screamed at me, hit me, threatened me, insulted me, and done everything to push me away, but I still know that you love me.

And I know you know that I love you, too.

Because it’s taken an invasion of a base, a broken down hyperdrive, a giant cave dwelling slug monster, Boba Fett, a carbonite chamber, and Darth fucking Vader himself to actually make me leave you. 

And I know that you will do everything in your power to bring me back. 

Sooo are we not going to talk about Magnus crying in 2x15? Look at the tear streaks on his face, and the one dropping off his nose.

2

My yoonkook story is going to be a gaming au! Normally, I don’t like gaming culture, but streaming culture I could adore! The two met online through overwatch during college, and had such a great dynamic in one game, they befriended each other. Little did they know, they went to the same school, so they decided to create a channel together to forget about struggles they’re going through in their real life. I’ll be working on some more comics of their interactions.

Other notes-
Other pairings are going to include namseok, onesided-sugamon, jinmin/vmin(can’t decide for now so we’ll see how it grows haha)

Feel free to send asks about this au– (jflaskdf sorry i make too many aus;; i just have so many ships i love;; i gotta make a storyline for each of them– I’ll try my best to answer them all– even without drawings because when I leaves asks in my askbox for too long I feel so bad about answering/not answering them;;;thanks guys)))

Lance was never one to get attention from his family. The good child, they always said. Didn’t cause trouble at school. Didn’t start fights, for the most part. He got decent enough grades. He worked his ass off for exams. He tried. It was one of the only reasons he got into the garrison. But it wasn’t like that amounted to much.

He was a cargo pilot. Second best. A replacement. Something that could be left behind if he needed to. Days weren’t so good anymore. He was miles, a lot of miles, away from his family, one of the only comforts he had. At least, as much of a comfort it could be.

When he was promoted to fighter class, he thought, maybe this is my chance. They saw how amazing I was. They noticed.

They didn’t. And it hurt. “The only reason you’re here is because the person before you had a discipline issue and flunked out!” He knew this. He truly did. He wasn’t special. He was a ‘what-not-to-do’ human example made for the public. He was a joke.

He tried his best to act like one. Took the attention off of Hunk and Pidge so they wouldn’t get hurt, wouldn’t get in trouble.

And then he stupidly got them sent to space. On a sentient lion. Away from Earth.

He would be okay if it was only him. But he brought people cared for: His Hero, His Crew, His Attempted Imitation. He got his family involved. He left them. No word. No letter. No nothing. He was gone.

Lance loved the people around him. But sometimes he wondered: Did they care for him too? He understood that he craved a lot of attention. He understood that he couldn’t always get what he needed. But, a little conversation sometimes would be nice. Someone to seek him out, even if it’s just for a little help.

In this castle ship, everyone has paired off. Keith and Shiro. Hunk and Pidge. Coran and Allura. He finds himself slip out of their attention, out of their view. And it hurts. Because it feels like they’re ignoring him. But he knows they wouldn’t do that. Would they?

One day, it hurts too much. As they’re all sitting at the table, Lance can feel his anxiety bubble up. Everyone is talking about a new battle plan that had too many holes in it, but Lance didn’t want to be the one to talk about it. He couldn’t be the one to point out all of the flaws that were all too obvious to him.

He choked up. His anxiety felt like it was at his throat. His eyes starting burning.

“-Ance. Lance!”

Lance bolted up, staring with wide eyes. He swallowed nervously, ignoring eye-contact. “Lance, are you alright?” Shiro inquired, concern lacing his voice.

“Yeah, perfectly fine. I just feel tired.”

“Are you sure? You don’t look so-”

“Shiro, I appreciate the concern, but no, I’m perfectly fine and absolute nothing is wrong.”

like - ok. I’m feeling very melodramatic today, here’s my rant. I’ve been trying to stay out of it at least publicly, but also sort of low-key constantly frustrated with the backlash against supercorp fandom in particular because like, I’m a high school teacher, and I spend a lot of time with teenage girls sobbing in my classroom over shit, and I just have a lot of protective feels about teen girls I guess.

There is bad behavior in the fandom, I do not deny it. But there’s bad behavior everywhere in every fandom, and lets not pretend all bad behavior gets called out equally. Like - fandom is an embarrassment. We’re all agreed, right? There is no fandom you could join where it would be completely unembarrassing and chill? If you’re about to name one, my suggestion is, “yeah…. wait a year, let’s watch those tags together, shall we?”

There’s a reason that the backlash against supercorp fans behaving badly has been so much more vicious than when other fans are obnoxious, and it has to do with who those fans are - young queer girls. I think teenage girls get derided for being interested in things more than just about anyone else. It makes me angry to be in a fandom where I see so many queer adults being assholes to and about queer teenage girls. Like - you could be a mentor instead? I guarantee that when you were 14 you were fucking obnoxious also?

And there’s a reason that the actors feel so comfortable being shitty to those fans too. Fans of straight ships are obnoxious as hell, and I’ve never seen a musical number about it.

All that said, it’s still an embarrassing fandom to be a part of, and I’m assured by trustworthy people that my refusal to join twitter has shielded me from seeing the worst of what has been some outrageously embarrassing behavior. But none of that makes it cool for a bunch of professional adult straight people to sing  a rude homophobic song to a bunch of queer teen fans making fun of them for seeing themselves in fiction.

I am just…. I’m currently very fed up with straight people. gonna add this to the lengthy list of reasons lol.

All of which is to say, I think I will spend my evening accepting Supercorp Revenge Prompts! Send me your porn prompts, and I’ll see how many I can churn out on a single Saturday night!!

An observation.

So i was rewatching 5x10 when Jo and Ellen die and we all know how much Dean was fucked up by Jo dying. But when the building exploded Dean looked very visibly heartbroken. But he was able to walk away with Sam because there was a bigger problem (Satan) that they needed to deal with right. He was still responsive. And yet with Cas dying in 12x23 there was kinda a bigger problem (Satan Baby) and he couldn’t he dropped to his knees. He wasn’t responsive. We all know how much Dean cared about Jo everyone shipped them if she didn’t die maybe they could’ve been together with the closest to happy they could get and yet Cas’ death effected him worse even if “destiel isn’t real” it just shows how much Cas means to Dean and it made me a sad. Too many feels happening at once.

10

You all asked for me to share my headcanons so here I am to deliver!! Sorry they’re super long and they’re also in no order whatsoever but here’s my take on otayuri and their friendship/relationship!

There are definitely a lot more like specific headcanons I have for them but I thought I would post what I have so far and the more world-building ones 😅

I’m actually thinking of maybe doing headcanons on this account too like you would request a prompt and I would write all my headcanons so let me know what you think!!

( @islysmiley i blame you for inspiring me to do this with our constant conversations about headcanons 😂)

I don’t usually get involved in the Supergirl ship drama, but sdcc is bringing out the crazy in WAY too many people. PSA: Jeremy and Melissa were just having fun with the song and voicing THEIR view on the ship. For so many people saying that they were disrespecting the LGBTQ+ community is ridiculous. However, I do understand feeling sadden about the comments. Do you know what kind of hate, death threats, etc. Chris Wood has been getting since Karamel became canon? He’s been disrespected by people who call themselves fans of the show by dragging his name through hell and back. Take a fucking seat and realise that this is a tv show and everyone, including the cast, has an opinion on the ships on the show. Melissa has ALWAYS stayed neutral when talking about Kara’s love interests, so for her to finally voice her opinion and be attacked and saying Supergirl is “cancelled” for it is so so gross. rant over.   

#MyMuseIsNotAFleshlight

I am not here for smut. I don’t mind writing it on occasion, but then it’s under certain conditions:

A well developed relationship between our muses
Both muns being interested (not just you)
Being able to actually do meaningful threads with you

I’ve been asked far too many times, across my blogs, “How do you feel about NSFW?” or “Can we ship?”

When those are the first questions you ask, the answer will be NO!

I want the relationship to develop naturally
Not to jump straight into a ship with no forethought as to if they would even work together

I’ve even deleted blogs because the character was nothing but a sex toy to my RP partners

My female muses are not fleshlights, and my male muses are not dildos

I write them as real people

And I want them treated as such.

Other RP blogs, feel free to reblog if your muse, also, is not a fleshlight.

Viva la fluff

21 Things you learn about tumblr:

1) Tumblr is a place of social justice.

2) Rape, sexual assault, harassment, abuse, self-harm, suicide, bullying, depression, eating disorders, anxiety, etc… Those are to be taken very VERY seriously. It’s not something to joke about.

3) If you are racist/homophobic or close-minded like that, this isn’t a place you wanna be.

4) People here say that you must not EVER speak of tumblr outside of tumblr, and that specifically includes mentioning your url on facebook/twitter or connecting your tumblr to them. And you know what? They’re right. We come here because tumblr is that place where we can express ourselves the way we want, and in a way stay safely anonymous from our own life outside of tumblr. Here (whether by posts, reblogs or tags) we reveal more of our identities, thoughts, secrets, insecurities, moments of insanity etc… than we would ever reveal on other SNS. If you’re interested in revealing yourself so openly to your social circle of family and friends outside of tumblr, if you’re ready for it, then I won’t judge you. Go ahead.

5) There are real people behind their computers/phones on this site. Real people who can have their feelings hurt. People have enough shit to deal with in their lives so don’t be that anon hater/cyber bully and make things worse.

6) Tumblr loves animals.

7) Your “I’ll just check my dash for five minutes” will turn to five hours of scrolling and reblogging.

8) DON’T fuck with superwholock. They will come for you.

9) Supernatural has a gif for everything. Don’t even try to test them, there’s no point.

10) Gifs everywhere.

11) No one really knows how to pronounce ‘gif’

12) I like your shoelace.

13) DON’T try to take credit for something you did not do. Always give credit to the artist/photographer/blog if you repost but still, there’s a reblog option for a reason.

14) There are too many sides of tumblr to count.

15) Science side of tumblr can explain anything.

16) Fandom side of tumblr can hijack any post.

17) DO NOT INSULT SOMEONES SHIP.

18) No one spells Benedips Cumbercumber’s name right.

19) Harry Potter is a beloved.

20) Kpop fandom are in constant ‘too many feels’ mode and are always unable to can.

21) Once you tumblr… there’s no going back.

the-moon-loves-the-sea  asked:

t'pura or mcspirk :)

Oh, I am so glad you asked for this one, my dear. TOS McSpirk is the ship that is nearest and dearest to my heart. I have so many feels, and so many headcanons, but I’ve always been a little intimidated of voicing them, because these three are just so damn important. Bear with me as I try my very best to do the triumvirate justice. @gracieminabox, I’m tagging you, too, solely because we’ve talked about some of this (or you’ve listened to me ramble at length, you wonderful person, you) and I am just drowning in my feels - throw me a life preserver, will ya?


Who said “I love you” first

None of them use the words.

It’s not something that needs to be spoken. 

Carrying another’s soul changes a man. Everything, everything Spock’s ever seen and known and done, Len’s right in the thick of it all. 

It’s as horrifying as it is mind-boggling. Len’s a deeply private person, and having someone else in his head, a rival, a friend, giving him a front row seat to all of his flaws and doubts and failings, well, that’s almost more than Len can bear.

Turns out, their minds are remarkably compatible. The man Len had sparred with, served with, depended on, fought against, and trusted with his very life becomes so deeply intertwined in Len’s consciousness that he can hardly separate where Leonard H. McCoy ends and S’chn T’gai Spock begins. They are one and the same, a duality housed in a single vessel, twin souls sharing a fragile human body.

Len’s shocked to find that Spock… still is, for lack of a better term. The living soul of another - katra, Spock corrects him pointedly - is just that, living. Spock is in the present; he reacts, and he thinks - boy, does he think, Len realizes - and Len very quickly has a hard time distinguishing between the thoughts that arise from his own mind, and those that are of Spock.

There’s no way to block it, either. 

 Len learns a very many things, seeing the world through Spock’s eyes. 

He learns that Jim is Spock’s t’hy’la (he’s not surprised at this, not a bit, he just hadn’t realized that “bromance” was an official Vulcan relationship with an official Vulcan name).

He learns that Vulcans feel emotions. Vulcans feel emotions very strongly, in fact. 

He learns about Spock’s past. About his childhood, about his home.

And he learns about himself.

It’s harder with Jim. Len catches the shadow of Jim’s essence through the fragile t’hy’la bond, like echoes in an empty room, but it’s dimmed, somehow, and Len can never be quite sure if the snatches of emotion and bleeding of thoughts that seem to emanate from Jim come from Jim-of-the-moment or memories of past-Jim supplied by the Spock who now lives only in Len’s head. Time seems to shift and bend, swirls of before looping over glints of today, Spock’s unfettered desire for Jim Kirk mingling and compounding with Len’s own until Len can hardly hold himself back (but he must, he must). The whole situation is enough to give him a pounding migraine that lasts for months.

Later, when Len wakes up on a stone slab with a throbbing head and a clawing emptiness in his soul, he realizes that he can still feel Spock.

Or rather, he can feel where Spock’s not

There’s a gaping hole in Len’s mind, where there should be the swirling thoughts of another. It’s a devastating, godawful feeling. Len’s known heartbreak before, countless times in countless ways, but this is different, starker, more absolute. There’s a piece of him missing, a whole other side of him gone, and Len feels as if he’s slowly breaking apart, as if everything that’s ever made him the man he is is slowly crumbling around him.

He hardly even recognizes himself.

Spock seems to be shutting him out. 

Spock, for his part, doesn’t know what to make of it. There is t’hy’la, his face so well-known and well-loved, the face that colors so many of his memories - “Your name is Jim,” - but there is the other, too. He has a bond with the other, the other whose face is so familiar and so beloved, the other who evokes such strange and bewildering emotions from his vulnerable heart. Their bond is wide open and blazing, like fire, like the sun, blinding in its brilliance. Spock’s memories are muddled and unexpected, colored by a lens that is not his, and he has a deeper understanding of the world and all that is in it than he’s ever remembered knowing before, a new, strange, human perspective. His knows a grief that is not his own, failures and triumphs and fierce pride and love, love, love, and a heartbreak, a loneliness that keens and blends with his own loneliness, thoughts that pulse and thrum and churn and break against his own thoughts.

“Remember.”

Spock snaps his barriers up with a force that very nearly sends him reeling.

It takes him time to sort it out, to tease apart the trappings of his own mind and to separate his own experiences from those of Leonard McCoy. 

“I’m gonna tell you something that I never thought I’d ever hear myself say. But it seems I’ve missed you. And I don’t know if I could stand to lose you again.”

It is only later, treading water in the tiny whale-tank on a centuries-old Earth, that Spock comes back to himself. 

“I am Spock,” he tells her. 

And he knows, then, that he is Spock, and that Jim is Jim, and that Leonard is Leonard, and that together, they are something new.

He waits for the opportune moment. 

It is a surprisingly difficult discipline, the waiting.

He manages it until the council hearing, and then, suddenly, he can resist no longer, moving to stand next to Jim and dropping his barriers just for an instant, hardly even glancing up to meet Leonard’s gaze.

He doesn’t have to - Leonard’s answering thrill of wonder and anticipation is like the rising of the sun, and its all there, magnified exponentially between them, joy, joy, joy, and love, love, love.

He finds them together that night, waiting for him in his own cabin.


Who would have the others’ picture as their phone background

There aren’t many photographs of just the three of them.

The background of Jim’s PADD is a picture of David.

The background of Len’s PADD is solid black. Spock and Len are remarkably similar in that regard (and in many others). Len, in any universe, prefers not to let anything distract him from his work, and it never occurs to Spock to personalize an object that is so clearly intended for his professional use.  

Spock, though, is the one who collects objects of sentimental value.

It is only logical to do so. Jim and Leonard are human; he will likely outlive them both by at least a century. A broken marriage bond can easily drive an otherwise healthy Vulcan into insanity, and once failed, the Kohlinar is no longer an option - Spock knows, deep in his most secret thoughts, that he would not make another attempt at purging his emotions, even if he could.

It is far, far too late for that.

So he stores away small things, a photo of the bridge crew, a scrap of napkin that Jim has scrawled on, a snapshot of Len smiling under the Georgia sun, mementos, moments, little glimpses of a life well-lived. He keeps them all carefully hidden in a tiny box - “This is my logic,” -  saving them for the day when memories are all he will have left of Leonard and Jim, these two extraordinary human men who have captured his heart so completely.

It is but a small price to pay, or so Spock tells himself.


Who leaves notes written in fog on the bathroom mirror

Len scrawls their names in the traditional vanu-tanaf-kitaunin, fingers tracing the elaborate loops and curves with a muscle memory that is not his own, the mirror squeaking softly as he writes.

Spock stands at his shoulder as if to correct him, never speaking, only watching. 

At length, Len pulls back. “Well, what do you think, Spock?” he asks, and Jim can see by the glint in his eye that he’s pleased with himself. “Not too bad, for a first try.”

Spock leans over him without a word, trailing one long finger at the edge of Len’s handiwork. “A satisfactory attempt,” he murmurs, flicking deftly to adjust the curve of serif that Len had neglected. “For a human.”

“Very pretty, Bones,” Jim reaches around them both, making his own mark on the glass. 

JTK was here.

Len lifts his eyes heavenward and sighs. 


Who buys the others cheesy gifts

Jim Kirk buys the cheesy gifts.

An “I <3 NY” shirt for Spock.

Red suede cowboy boots for Len (who wears them proudly).

“World’s Best Husband” mugs for all three of them.


Who initiated the first kiss

Len and Jim have kissed several times before the initiation of their relationship. 

Len and Jim have been each others’ best friend, drinking buddy, and wing man for years. They’ve participated in more than a few wild nights - most notably that one exceptional shore leave on Argelius - and neither of them are adverse to a little inebriated physical affection.

After all, what’s a kiss between friends?

Spock and Jim, at the time of Spock’s death, were only beginning to explore their physical relationship. Spock had initiated a few superficial melds, but Jim, for the most part, remained aware of the t’hy’la bond only in passing, and Spock had only briefly introduced him to the Vulcan ozh’esta. 

Never a full, proper, human, lips on lips kiss.

Later, after the fal-tor-pan and the awful excursion to the 20th century - whales, really? - and the revelation of Jim’s council meeting - “Mr. President, I stand with my shipmates,” - Len knows it’s time.

He doesn’t need to approach Spock. For one glorious moment, Spock had dropped the barriers between them, and the bond had flared to life, singing in Len’s mind, an all-consuming joy so sudden and fierce that it had very nearly brought Len to his knees.

He manages to keep himself upright, but only just, basking in the glow of Spock’s presence against his, so long-missed, so absolutely vital. They share the moment, both an instant and an eternity, and when Spock pulls back, Len has the sensation of falling into himself. He’s left with a new understanding and a contentment like he’s never known, save for the dull ache of desire in his deep in his chest.

He finds Jim, and he lays it all on the table.

Jim’s intake of breath, after Len finally runs out of words, is sharp, harsh, and Len is afraid, for one terrible moment, that he’s misjudged things horribly.

“Oh, Bones,” Jim breathes, and then he’s kissing Len for all he’s worth, taking Len by the upper arms and pulling him onto his toes.

Jim’s lips are warm and soft and familiar and right on his, and Len realizes, suddenly, that this is only the beginning. 

It’s the most joyful thing he’s ever known.


Who kisses the others awake in the morning

Not Jim.

Otherwise, it depends on who wakes first.

Typically, this is Spock. Vulcans require less sleep than humans, so its typically Spock tracing the curve of Jim’s jaw or the edge of Leonard brow, with his lips, with his fingers, with his tongue.

Sometimes, though, it’s Len. Len is a nuzzler. Len likes to bury his face in the crook of Spock’s neck and to curl his body protectively around Jim’s. Len kisses the hollow of Jim’s throat, the soft patch of skin behind Spock’s ears, running his fingers down their chests and shoulders, paying special attention to the sensitive spots on the inside of Spock’s elbows.

Jim’s a little more passive. On the rare occasion that he’s up first, he likes to lay beside his husbands and watch them. Len, early bird though he is, is a total bear when woken unexpectedly, and it is so rare to catch Spock unawares that Jim feels as if he’s obligated to savor the moment. Spock’s face is relaxed, the tension and sharp lines fallen away, and Bones, though he’ll deny it to his dying day, snores softly and smacks his lips in his sleep. 

Jim wouldn’t wake them for the world.


Who starts tickle fights

Jim is typically the instigator of the tickle fight.

Len’s got a tiny spot just at his inner thigh that sets him giggling until he can hardly breathe, red-faced and panting, tears running down his cheeks.

Jim lives for these moments.

Len’s retribution, when he can finally manage it, is swift and brutal. Jim may be bigger and stronger, but Len is fast. He sprawls on top of Jim, long fingers extracting their revenge with all the precision and finesse of a highly skilled surgeon. 

Jim Kirk begs for mercy.

Spock watches it all impassively from the corner of the bed, the gentle thrum of satisfaction that filters through their bond the only evidence of his amusement.

Until Len exploits his superior knowledge of Vulcan physiology, that is.


Who asks who if they can join the other in the shower

Surprisingly, this is Spock.

Jim doesn’t ask if he can join Len, not that Len expects it. He pushes his way through the sliding glass door, and automatically Len shifts to accommodate him, without a word.

Jim, though, is remarkably efficient with their shared time in the shower. He hops in, does his business, and hops out, dripping little puddles all over the bathroom floor and humming softly under his breath.

Len takes his sweet time. There’s something wonderful about the thrum of real water on his bare skin, and despite the environmental control systems on board the Enterprise, the vastness of space leaves him feeling cold and hollow. A hot shower is a comfort, and he savors it.

Spock is strangely drawn to Leonard during these moments. It’s as if something in the water melts whatever subtle barriers remain between them, and Spock finds himself dumbstruck by Leonard, Leonard with his eyes closed and his face upturned, lips parted just slightly, Leonard who’s completely oblivious of Spock’s presence, just standing utterly still and letting the water fall over him like rain.

The words, May I join you, are hardly out of Spock’s mouth before Len’s breathing a harsh, “Yeah,” and Spock is shedding his cloak and climbing deftly into the shower with his bondmate.

Jim finds them a long time later. “Well, thanks for the invitation,” he manages just before Spock yanks him into the downpour, shirt and all.


Who surprises the others at work with lunch

They all eat lunch together, when they can.

It’s actually an old habit. During the five year mission, Jim would often have his lunch with Bones in the sickbay, or with Spock, when they could both leave the bridge. Occasionally, when their schedules allowed it, they’d all take their lunch breaks together in the mess hall, Bones sassing at Spock, Spock snarking at Bones, Jim indulgently running interference between them (and often subtly egging them on).

Now, years later, the pattern remains. Bones still sasses Spock, Spock still snarks Bones, Jim still looks on in besotted amusement.

Some things never change.


Who was nervous and shy on the first date

There’s not a first date, necessarily. 

After the kiss - it’s a particularly long kiss - Jim can hardly find words. 

“Bones,” he breathes, eyes wide and a little bit desperate. “Are you sure? He’s -”

“Jim,” Len takes Jim’s hand in his own. “I’m sure.”

They wait for Spock together.

Len’s certain, this time. The look Spock had given him across the council chamber had said enough.

The bond had said everything.

The door opens, and there’s a beat of silence.

It all hangs in the balance. The past, the future, literal lifetimes shared between them.

“Spock,” Jim bursts. He takes half a step forward, then stops suddenly, as if reminding himself, “Be gentle, don’t press.”

“Jim. Leonard.” Spock nods toward them, utterly serene, his dark eyes giving nothing away.

Len feels as if his heart’s about to burst.

Enough, enough.

“Oh, god, c’mere,” he chokes, throwing his arms open wide and shoving all of his love, his wonder, all of himself toward the Spock-shaped hole in his heart.

Spock moves, the barriers fall, and the bond sings.


Who kills/takes out the spiders

Spock is the best at catching the spiders. 

Len’s too busy harassing Jim. “Haven’t seen you jump so high in years,” he laughs.

“Could be poisonous,” Jim informs him primly, stepping lithely down from the dresser only after Spock has relocated the offending critter outside. “Better safe than sorry, you know, Bones.”

“I’ll remember you said that,” Len tells him pointedly, “the next time you decide to scale a goddamn cliff face with no safety gear!”

Jim does not honor this with a response.


Who loudly proclaims their love when they’re drunk

Len is the tactile one of the three, and this is only exaggerated when he’s drunk. He worships his lovers with his hands and with his body, litany of murmured praises falling like honey from his lips.

Spock is seldom inebriated. In fact, he’s far more likely to act as a keeper to Len and Jim, silly humans with their silly love of recreational cognitive impairment. He keeps a watchful eye on the two of them, carefully concealing his indulgent amusement at their drunken antics.

Rarely, though, Spock will have a piece of Jim’s chocolate pie, or accept Len’s offer of a drink (Len never fails to offer).

Then, Spock becomes a wild thing, a Vulcan of the days of old, a physical being in the most inherent sense. Making love is an art and a science, and Spock, particularly when he loses his inhibitions, excels at it. The somatosensory cortex of a Vulcan brain is exquisitely complex, and that, coupled with the ingenuity and innate intensity of the human experience, renders Spock completely powerless to his own desires. He throws himself into his task, flooding the bond wide open and laying waste to his mates’ bodies with a fervor and ferocity that borders on primal, delighting in the heat of their skin under his.

Len, for his part, can never quite contain his thrill of anticipation when Spock’s fingers subtly brush his as he passes Spock the bottle of Saurian brandy.

Jim is the romantic. 

Jim, when he’s drunk, serenades his husbands with classical literature, and sometimes, with old-earth love songs.

Wise men say

Only fools rush in

But I can’t help

Falling in love with you

Len joins him occasionally, when he’s had enough that the long forgotten lyrics come easily and he forgets the warble in his voice. 

Like a river flows 

Surely to the sea

Darling so it goes

Some things are meant to be

They join hands, swaying a little with the rhythm of the music and the alcohol. Jim reaches toward Spock, drawing him in, holding him close, and Spock allows it, allows his free fingers to slip into Leonard’s, allows the glow of the moment to wash over him, allows himself the simple joy of just being here, with them, together, these two humans who he loves more than life itself.

Take my hand

Take my whole life too

For I can’t help

Falling in love with you


Link to Anna’s Masterlist here