12 Reasons Why Old Souls Have Such A Hard Time Finding Love
1. They have a strong sense of identity.
They know who they are, which means they also know – specifically – what they do and do not want in a partner, what works and what doesn’t. While this is fantastic in terms of being able to choose wisely, it ultimately diminishes their pool of prospects pretty significantly.
2. Left unchecked, their hyper-intuitiveness can wreck relationships.
Often prone to overthinking because of how deeply sensitive they are, their capacity to worry and make assumptions can break relationships that don’t have a perfectly strong foundation.
3. Many are in the throes of twin flame relationships.
They’re attached or are with people who are not their “forever” people, rather, intense connections they’re meant to learn, and rapidly expand, from.
4. They often have a greater purpose that must be attended to first – one that love would distract them from.
They usually have to accomplish quite a bit on their own before they find love – this is because old souls love deeply, and completely. To be given love too soon would keep them from the other important things they are here to do.
5. They will not settle for anything less than soulmate love.
They require a lot more than just a surface-level, “average” relationship. They absolutely will not settle, and sometimes, that means biting the bullet and being alone for longer than what’s “average” as well.
6. While many people can bring them passion, few can bring compatibility.
Because they feel so deeply and others find them so fascinating, it’s easy for them to find infatuation, but to be with someone who is truly their best friend, deepest confidant *and* lover is a challenge.
7. They’re less inclined to go out and meet people in modern ways.
Even if they have nothing against online dating, it doesn’t always come naturally for them, nor does finding a random hookup at a bar or being set up blindly seem appealing.
8. They’re natural healers, and often attract people who need help, not love.
And that attraction is reciprocated. There’s almost nothing that feels better to an old soul than being able to help someone who truly needs it. However, at some point in time, it’s crucial for them to realize that they have to choose a partner, not a student, or a charity case.
9. They dislike the “game.”
Dating is inherently exhausting to an older-spirited person. Feigning disinterest for the sake of looking “cool” or knowing which faux pas other people find off-putting (how long after the first date do you text again?) isn’t instinctive to them, and can stress them out more than they ever find it “fun.”
10. Their standards are sky-high.
They expect a lot from themselves, so likewise, they expect a lot from their partners. While this is a great thing, it’s another quality that has to be kept in check: it’s more important to be able to accept the qualities that aren’t deal-breakers than it is to just write a person off because they’re imperfect.
11. They have baggage.
People who developed their inner selves quickly did so for a reason: they had to cope, they had to grow, or they had to learn from some challenging experiences that life set up for them. While this is a great thing on its own, unresolved issues can often re-manifest in close relationships.
12. They feel fear as intensely as they feel love.
The degree to which they love something is proportionate to how much they fear losing it, or not being “good enough” for it. They don’t just love intensely, they feel everything else intensely, too, and sometimes, that gets in the way of the really good things in front of them.
Like a whole bunch of other people, I saw @charminglyantiquated ’s Elsewhere University Comic and got SUPER INSPIRED. And since she’s so generously encouraging other people to play in her sandbox, I present ‘Feathers’. EDIT : PART 2 HERE
You go to Elsewhere University. You’ve been going to Elsewhere University for (years and years and years and years) for three years now. You know how things are. You’re not an RA, but… Mm, you could have been.
Might still be. Aren’t yet.
This is your junior year (you think). You know how things are. You carry salt in one pocket, iron in another, trinkets to bargain away in your book bag, offerings in your purse, pearls around your neck.
I need a cooking show where the contestants are tasked with recreating fictional dishes
“Make this dish that showed up in that anime one time - it looks like this and it’s slightly spicy. This is all we know” *shows big picture on a screen*
“Your task today is to make a health potion. It should be able to stay preserved for a week in room temperature, at least. But it’s not like we can really check that on a 1 hour show. Still, keep it in mind”
and then the old man who lives alone with two dogs and a cat wins, and the gamer and the anime nerd look at him in horror whispering “how…” to themselves
Not su critical, but I wish there was less human episodes and plot's loose ends weren't left forgotten for literal ages. I just, idk, feel like crewniverse wants us like lars or ronaldo too much
i mean, by definition it’s not forgotten if it’s brought up again. the show is just very long-term and demands you have a lot of patience sometimes (which makes it satisfying when it happens, but it can also be frustrating before that).
on the subject of humans: i’m not always super invested, but there’s always a rewarding or clever element. i like connie, kiki and sadie a lot. greg’s alright. the cool kids too. while onion’s not my favorite, his episodes tend to be solid and gives us interesting steven-characterization (onion gang was quite nice, they finally made me emotional about both onion and steven’s loneliness).
i have a buddy who loves lars with all his heart - i know he’s not the most popular character, but i like him alright, too. he’s the kind of teenager who can be a jerk without being a one-note bully. there’s a good post going around about you kinda need to see the humans to feel the payoff of them (spoilers) seemingly getting kidnapped in this next bomb, which will be another interesting mix of the human and magical elements of the show.
the “slice of life” elements also has another important function, which i think is vitally important - in fantasy / sci-fi stories, there’s a lot of Othering. by which i mean, strictly good vs evil escapism where a lot of the time, the enemy is so inhuman they might as well be a natural disaster, not a person. good and evil is often decided by which magical species or alien race you belong to, not who you are as a person.
slice of life is the complete opposite - you have your jerks, but they’re still human. those stories rarely end with anyone being murdered for their crimes and this being portrayed as a “victory”. it’s pretty common that while the main character’s perspective expands, we get to know even those characters who we assumed were just cruel or bullies. everyone has some struggle going on, and the punishments for their crimes are not that they’re irredeemable or die. rather, they’re allowed to actually develop and/or have nuances to them.
both sci-fi and fantasy also have an expectation of war in recent years - there’s the expectation of constant high stakes and people getting killed. the plot is expected to constantly be the focus - we need to find the Thing to fight the Dark Side. we need to get to Place before Evil gets there first. the Chosen One needs to collect all five Orbs, four of which symbolize the four friends, and the fifth one will awaken her own power. the Enemy needs to be Stopped, their reasons are (usually) irrelevant.
on the other side, slice of life is very personal: everything is character-driven, and their motivations is the main reason to watch it. i saw a lot of surprise that “yuri on ice” didn’t have a traditional villain - my response was basically “…well, yeah, it’s slice of life”. that’s kinda how it usually works. especially in anime - you may not get to know every character equally well, and some will be deeply flawed, but no one is sorted into a box labelled “inhuman” or “evil”.
so what’s my point? well, steven universe continuously trains its audience to see slice-of-life elements in the ~magical space conflict. it tells you to see the characters through a ‘human’ lens, even the characters who aren’t human. part of how it does this is by adding surprising amounts of empathy and human solutions - not just to the beach city problems, but to the gem problems as well.
the first time we see two diamonds together - the Intergalactic Tyrants™ who most fanart depict as the final boss overlords all the “less-awful” characters will unite against in a Final Battle? oh, they’re grieving the loss of their fellow diamond. blue diamond is crying. their pearls are there, standing as a reminder of the hierarchy they champion, but neither element ruins the other - they can be sympathetic and deeply flawed at the same time. when it’s towards the people they care about, they even seem well-intentioned. yellow diamond chastises blue for not being a good leader to her people.
part of the reason this seems natural is because the show has portrayed its human characters as flawed, not as a faceless mass of “good people” who must be saved from the evil alien race. so it makes sense it would work the other way around too - everyone’s got their own stuff to deal with, and everyone makes (sometimes massive) mistakes.
we’re expected to see both gems and humans as people. part of this is because of the human side of steven’s upbringing - the old crystal gems are used to meeting allies and enemies, steven is mostly used to meeting people, even if he (like everyone) has his own biases between them, or thinks some of them are “mean”.
despite some people’s consistent insistence that any jerk we’re introduced to is just a villain, that’s it, end of story, steven universe continues to challenge those assumptions. time and time again. that’s part of why it’s so vital (to me) that no one are just killed off or bubbled forever, because the show has laid the groundwork that every life is unique, and suffering is never a good thing.
it can be a trade-off, like how we’re exploring rose’s shattering of pink diamond, and yknow, there WAS a war in the style of sci-fi/fantasy, but the show is critical of that solution. pink’s shattering did not, in fact, end the conflict - her death left countless gems leaderless, mourning and FAR from ‘liberated’ (in fact, many of them hate the crystal gems), and earth was still under the slow threat of the cluster… and how was that cluster solved again? not by force, but by talking to a hostile and vicious little green alien. then getting her help to reach the huge, suffering eldritch abomination in the center of the earth… which was also stopped by communication, not by force.
the human side of the show helps steven cope with gem life, make connections that are important to him, develop his character and fuel his desire to help.
i know some will insist these are unrelated, but i think without steven’s human side, he would really “just” be another crystal gem. an empathetic one, who is curious about people, but not on this level. not one who opposes the idea of not just shattering, but wants to find a way to connect with everyone (as he is like no one and everyone), and has the kind of boundless optimism where he refuses to accept that this is just “the way things are”, or that suffering is ever necessary. everything is always changing on earth, and because of that, steven wants to believe everything can always change.
1. shaving with men’s razors can give you a closer and cleaner shave making the area smoother and helping it to also last longer. they are also cheaper than women’s razors
2. shaving with coconut oil/hair conditioner is cheaper than using typical shaving creams/gels and they can also leave the area feeling super soft and smooth and can also reduce razor cuts and burns
3. try not to shave your vagina too much and try to go longer in between shaves. there is hair there for a reason, it helps to protect the vagina from bacteria and disease and if your partner doesn’t like you having hair on your vagina or hair anywhere else on your body, forget about them!!! hair is completely natural and there isn’t much you can do about it
4. vaginas will never taste like mangoes and strawberries, it’s a vagina… but avoiding foods that are super greasy and eating more fruits can help to make it smell and taste better
5. wash your vagina with just water and don’t use any soaps/body wash around that area. the vagina has its own pH levels and adding things to the area can mess with that. having a balanced pH level also means that the vagina will smell better
6. don’t wash your vagina too often throughout the day, the vagina also has good bacteria and washing it too much means you’re also gonna be washing away all that good bacteria that’s meant to be there. the vagina is self cleansing
7. try wearing breathable underwear as often a possible as it will help keep your vagina feeling fresh and can also prevent yeast infections
8. if you want your makeup to last throughout sex the use a long wear foundation, set your makeup in place with powder, use a setting spray and wear liquid lipsticks (i recommend using estee lauder double wear foundation, urban decay all nighter setting spray and kat von d/colourpop/anastasia beverly hills liquid lipsticks, they all last through pretty much anything)
9. stretch marks are completely normal and pretty much everyone has them but if you want to get rid of them or reduce the appearance of your stretch marks then try using coconut oil/bio oil over the area every day and eventually they will begin to fade
10. make sure to moisturise daily as it will help keep your skin feeling soft and smooth
11. spray perfume/deodorant just before having sex so that you stay smelling good as sex can become super sweaty
12. never depend on men to carry protection with them, keep some spares in your purse
13. before having sex make sure that you do lots of foreplay as it will make you feel more aroused and this will help make the sex feel better for you
14. make sure to be well lubricated and keep lube on hand for when needed
15. communication is always key when it comes to having sex! if you’re feeling uncomfortable or if it’s hurting for you then make sure that you tell your partner, let them know if you want them to go slower or try different angels and positions. if you want them to stop then it’s also important that you tell them to, sometimes having a safe word can also help (a safe word can be absolutely anything)
16. always make sure to pee after sex as it can help to eliminate any bacteria and prevent any chances of having a urinary tract infection
17. baking soda can help to get rid of cum stains
18. always use protection! even if you’re on the pill or using other contraceptive methods you still wanna use condoms during sex as it will prevent you from getting STIs
19. instead of using an oil-based product for lube use something that is water-based as oil-based products can increase the chances of condoms breaking (including vaseline, don’t use it). using two condoms can also increase the chances of this due to friction, instead try looking for condoms that are extra strong
20. don’t do anything that you’re not 100% sure about!!! if you don’t want to have sex you do not have to and you should never let anyone pressure you into doing anything that you don’t want to do
i literally spent the whole day practicing, filming & editing this my phone’s gonna burst. it’s not exactly the best and the timings really off for some parts but hey at least i tried!! and to commerate nct 127’s first win, it’s a good date to post this jskdnd
i posted my first and last’s cover here once, alongside with limitless’! hope you all dont cringe too hard watching this video while i go bury myself in my bed 😭
What are other books/series that you'd recommend that are in the same vein as Animorphs?
Honestly, your ask inspired me to get off my butt and finally compile a list of the books that I reference with my character names in Eleutherophobia, because in a lot of ways that’s my list of recommendations right there: I deliberately chose children’s and/or sci-fi stories that deal really well with death, war, dark humor, class divides, and/or social trauma for most of my character names. I also tend to use allusions that either comment on Animorphs or on the source work in the way that the names come up.
That said, here are The Ten Greatest Animorphs-Adjacent Works of Literature According to Sol’s Totally Arbitrary Standards:
1. A Ring of Endless Light, Madeline L’Engle
This is a really good teen story that, in painfully accurate detail, captures exactly what it’s like to be too young to really understand death while forced to confront it anyway. I read it at about the same age as the protagonist, not that long after having suffered the first major loss in my own life (a friend, also 14, killed by cancer). It accomplished exactly what a really good novel should by putting words to the experiences that I couldn’t describe properly either then or now. This isn’t a light read—its main plot is about terminal illness, and the story is bookended by two different unexpected deaths—but it is a powerful one.
2. The One and Only Ivan, K.A. Applegate
This prose novel (think an epic poem, sort of like The Iliad, only better) obviously has everything in it that makes K.A. Applegate one of the greatest children’s authors alive: heartbreaking tragedy, disturbing commentary on the human condition, unforgettably individuated narration, pop culture references, and poop jokes. Although I’m mostly joking when I refer to Marco in my tags as “the one and only” (since this book is narrated by a gorilla), Ivan does remind me of Marco with his sometimes-toxic determination to see the best of every possible situation when grief and anger allow him no other outlet for his feelings and the terrifying lengths to which he will go in order to protect his found family.
3. My Teacher Flunked the Planet, Bruce Coville
Although the entire My Teacher is an Alien series is really well-written and powerful, this book is definitely my favorite because in many ways it’s sort of an anti-Animorphs. Whereas Animorphs (at least in my opinion) is a story about the battle for personal freedom and privacy, with huge emphasis on one’s inner identity remaining the same even as one’s physical shape changes, My Teacher Flunked the Planet is about how maybe the answer to all our problems doesn’t come from violent struggle for personal freedoms, but from peaceful acceptance of common ground among all humans. There’s a lot of intuitive appeal in reading about the protagonists of a war epic all shouting “Free or dead!” before going off to battle (#13) but this series actually deconstructs that message as blind and excessive, especially when options like “all you need is love” or “no man is an island” are still on the table.
4. Moon Called, Patricia Briggs
I think this book is the only piece of adult fiction on this whole list, and that’s no accident: the Mercy Thompson series is all about the process of adulthood and how that happens to interact with the presence of the supernatural in one’s life. The last time I tried to make a list of my favorite fictional characters of all time, it ended up being about 75% Mercy Thompson series, 24% Animorphs, and the other 1% was Eugenides Attolis (who I’ll get back to in my rec for The Theif). These books are about a VW mechanic, her security-administrator next door neighbor, her surgeon roommate, her retail-working best friend and his defense-lawyer boyfriend, and their cybersecurity frenemy. The fact that half those characters are supernatural creatures only serves to inconvenience Mercy as she contemplates how she’s going to pay next month’s rent when a demon destroyed her trailer, whether to get married for the first time at age 38 when doing so would make her co-alpha of a werewolf pack, what to do about the vampires that keep asking for her mechanic services without paying, and how to be a good neighbor to the area ghosts that only she can see.
5. The Thief, Megan Whalen Turner
This book (and its sequel A Conspiracy of Kings) are the ones that I return to every time I struggle with first-person writing and no Animorphs are at hand. Turner does maybe the best of any author I’ve seen of having character-driven plots and plot-driven characters. This book is the story of five individuals (with five slightly different agendas) traveling through an alternate version of ancient Greece and Turkey with a deceptively simple goal: they all want to work together to steal a magical stone from the gods. However, the narrator especially is more complicated than he seems, which everyone else fails to realize at their own detriment.
6. Homecoming, Cynthia Voight
Critics have compared this book to a modern, realistic reimagining of The Boxcar Children, which always made a lot of sense to me. It’s the story of four children who must find their own way from relative to relative in an effort to find a permanent home, struggling every single day with the question of what they will eat and how they will find a safe place to sleep that night. The main character herself is one of those unforgettable heroines that is easy to love even as she makes mistake after mistake as a 13-year-old who is forced to navigate the world of adult decisions, shouldering the burden of finding a home for her family because even though she doesn’t know what she’s doing, it’s not like she can ask an adult for help. Too bad the Animorphs didn’t have Dicey Tillerman on the team, because this girl shepherds her family through an Odysseus-worthy journey on stubbornness alone.
7. High Wizardry, Diane Duane
The Young Wizards series has a lot of good books in it, but this one will forever be my favorite because it shows that weird, awkward, science- and sci-fi-loving girls can save the world just by being themselves. Dairine Callahan was the first geek girl who ever taught me it’s not only okay to be a geek girl, but that there’s power in empiricism when properly applied. In contrast to a lot of scientifically “smart” characters from sci-fi (who often use long words or good grades as a shorthand for conveying their expertise), Dairine applies the scientific method, programming theory, and a love of Star Wars to her problem-solving skills in a way that easily conveys that she—and Diane Duane, for that matter—love science for what it is: an adventurous way of taking apart the universe to find out how it works. This is sci-fi at its best.
8. Dr. Franklin’s Island, Gwyneth Jones
If you love Animorphs’ body horror, personal tragedy, and portrayal of teens struggling to cope with unimaginable circumstances, then this the book for you! I’m only being about 80% facetious, because this story has all that and a huge dose of teen angst besides. It’s a loose retelling of H.G. Wells’s classic The Island of Doctor Moreau, but really goes beyond that story by showing how the identity struggles of adolescence interact with the identity struggles of being kidnapped by a mad scientist and forcibly transformed into a different animal. It’s a survival story with a huge dose of nightmare fuel (seriously: this book is not for the faint of heart, the weak of stomach, or anyone who skips the descriptions of skin melting and bones realigning in Animorphs) but it’s also one about how three kids with a ton of personal differences and no particular reason to like each other become fast friends over the process of surviving hell by relying on each other.
9. Sideways Stories from Wayside School, Louis Sachar
Louis Sachar is the only author I’ve ever seen who can match K.A. Applegate for nihilistic humor and absurdist horror layered on top of an awesome story that’s actually fun for kids to read. Where he beats K.A. Applegate out is in terms of his ability to generate dream-like surrealism in these short stories, each one of which starts out hilariously bizarre and gradually devolves into becoming nightmare-inducingly bizarre. Generally, each one ends with an unsettling abruptness that never quite relieves the tension evoked by the horror of the previous pages, leaving the reader wondering what the hell just happened, and whether one just wet one’s pants from laughing too hard or from sheer existential terror. The fact that so much of this effect is achieved through meta-humor and wordplay is, in my opinion, just a testament to Sachar’s huge skill as a writer.
10. Magyk, Angie Sage
As I mentioned, the Septimus Heap series is probably the second most powerful portrayal of the effect of war on children that I’ve ever encountered; the fact that the books are so funny on top of their subtle horror is a huge bonus as well. There are a lot of excellent moments throughout the series where the one protagonist’s history as a child soldier (throughout this novel he’s simply known as “Boy 412″) will interact with his stepsister’s (and co-protagonist’s) comparatively privileged upbringing. Probably my favorite is the moment when the two main characters end up working together to kill a man in self-defense, and the girl raised as a princess makes the horrified comment that she never thought she’d actually have to kill someone, to which her stepbrother calmly responds that that’s a privilege he never had; the ensuing conversation strongly implies that his psyche has been permanently damaged by the fact that he was raised to kill pretty much from infancy, but all in a way that is both child-friendly and respectful of real trauma.