tom's diary

Leonardo DiCaprio Photographed by David LaChapelle, Hollywood 1996

100 Harry Potter Prompts: Part 1

This list is #$@&%*! amazing, amigos! Thanks for all the submissions. Here is part 1:

  1. Parseltongues aren’t the only ones who can talk to certain animals; There are a number of hereditary abilities that allow wizards to understand and communicate with other species. You are a young wizard who can understand birds, and it is driving you CRAZY.
  2. 10 years later, on the day of the battle of Hogwarts. George is standing in front of the mirror, looking himself in the eyes, wishing that his reflection was someone else.
  3. Harry Potter prompt: The Basilisk from the Chamber of Secrets is back! …but now it’s the size of a thread snake.
  4. A muggle angered by the fact that there are only 10 dragons in this world and 7 of them are European, sets off to find more dragons.
  5. Your entire family is full of Hufflepuffs, so during your sorting you begged the Sorting Hat to place you there. Now you’re older and definitely a Slytherin and you need to hide it.
  6. Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes has an adult section in the back.
  7. after Ron picks up the wrong hairs for a polyjuice potion Hermione is making, the two find themselves in each other’s bodies.
  8. You are the new heir of Slytherin, capable of opening the Chamber of Secrets and talking to snakes. On your first visit you find the monster dead. Not that you care, you never hated muggles anyway. Instead you start giving guided tours, charging a couple of Sickles for each tour, trying your best not to make the teachers notice.
  9. You’re a muggle born sorted into Slytherin of all places. The other students warn you that the Bloody Baron hates muggles, but to your surprise, the ghost has somewhat of a different view on muggleborns like you…
  10. Harry DOES get sorted into Slytherin when he asks not to be and becomes best friends with Draco as well.
  11. No one knew Voldemort was the last line of defence against them. Now he’s gone, and they are coming.
  12. Many years after the Dark Lord Voldemort was killed, a new dark lord has come. He’s part of the ministry and the new candidate for minister of magic..
  13. When Harry Potter dies in his first year at Hogwarts, Hermoine Granger takes on the duty of defeating the dark lord and succeeds in her task in the second year. The wizarding world is safe once again. Describe how she managed this.
  14. Write about Hermiones struggles and success as Minister of Magic.
  15. The dementors may suck the souls out of their victims with their kiss, but what happens to the soul after that?
  16. As a young gifted wizard, Sirius Black once found the Mirror of Erised; but what did he see as he glanced upon its glass?
  17. Hagrid comes every year to celebrate Harry’s birthday
  18. Harry never got a letter. He goes through his day to day life as a muggle, never noticing obnoxiously weird things around him. Write a day in the life of harry the muggle
  19. You’re invited to Tom riddle’s 6th birthday party
  20. Magical patronuses are extremely rare. It’s said that only the pure or the purely evil can conjure them. You’re a Slytherin trying to prove what they say about Slytherins is wrong. In Defence against dark arts, you just found out your patronus is a Hungarian horntail.
  21. “Don’t worry, Potter,” said the Dark Lord, “killing will get easier. And as my right hand man, you’ll need to get used to it.”
  22. Au where Snape is the chosen one and Harry is the Potions master
  23. In second year, Draco writes in the diary of Tom Riddle instead, and gets some pretty sound advice.
  24. “You went to school for seven years and THIS is what you use your skills on? Just- Just tell us why THIS branch of Animagi…?”
  25. Harry’s a girl, and has to deal with all the Voldemort shit when she has cramps so she’s extra pissed off.
  26. The Nimbus 3000 just came out, you are one galleon short but you desperately want it, how will you get your hands on the new broom?
  27. You somehow stumble into Filch’s office and grab the nearest artifact before you escape.
  28. Both Harry and Neville are the ‘chosen ones’. Only together are they able to defeat the Dark Lord. Unfortunately, everyone thinks only Harry is the ‘chosen one’. Follow Neville and co. as they discover the truth.
  29. Divination has a new muggle-born teacher, who seems more intent on teaching useful life lessons than magic.
  30. “You’re a wizard, Hermione.”
  31. “How many times have I told you to leave your dragons in Romania?!”
  32. “You’re a wizard, Harry.” “No shit!”
  33. All the Harry Potter character have switch roles, so that the heroes are now the villains. Who’s who and what happens?
  34. Mcgonagall, after noticing Harry’s letter is being ignored, goes to the Dursleys to check on the young wizard.
  35. Harry wonders what the fuck kinda school this is when Dumbledore says “ The third floor corridor is out of bounds for anyone that doesn’t want to die a most painful death.”
  36. Hermione Granger is one of those kids who is in classes meant for those a few years older than her, she is a genius.
  37. You are a muggle, yet direct magic doesn’t affect you, you wander into Hogwarts, you are not harmed by the shriek of mandrake plants, a basilisk cannot petrify you, magical devices break at your touch. you are a magic null.
  38. You thought you’d made a simple mistake in potions. As you sit outside the headmaster’s office, straining to hear the grave conversation from behind the door, it dawns on you that your error couldn’t have been as simple as it seemed.
  39. Harry goes on a journey of self-love by hiking around an Arby’s parking lot at 2am.
  40. The series is entirely the same but Voldemort and Snape have swapped noses .
  41. A day in the life of Dobby.
  42. Lucius is sacrificed by Voldemort and dies in the Wizarding War leaving pregnant Narcissa disillusioned and scared. She seeks help from Dumbledore and becomes a double agent.
  43. “Hmm, courage… yes… plenty of intelligence too! Very loyal… but crafty… hmm. Tricky, very tricky. I’m sorry, but you don’t seem to belong in any specific house. Better be… HOGWARTS!!!”
  44. Harry and Ron/Hermione and Ginny become the canon ships.
  45. Hermione and Ron visit America for a family vacation. Write about their adventures.
  46. Sassy harry calling Snape and Dumbledore out on their bullshit   24/7.
  47. Ravenclaws have a chamber of secrets, but it’s just a library of infinite knowledge too nerdy to touch.
  48. Post-apocalyptic Draco and Harry, where Draco needs the help of Harry in order for both of them to survive.
  49. You thought you were a muggle-born witch/wizard and then you find one of your long before ancestors in the portraits of the school’s corridors.
  50. You can do magic without a wand. You are the second most wanted after Voldemort.
  51. Disco balls and disco and lgbt folks at Hogwarts
  52. A student is accepted into Hogwarts only to find out it was a mistake and they don’t actually have any magical abilities. Tell their story of trying to make it through Hogwarts after all these years.
  53. Remus Lupin adopts Harry.  He never lived with the Dursleys. Tell us his happy Wizarding Childhood.
  54. You’re a historian writing a critical paper on The Battle Of Hogwarts. You believe the existing discourse has ignored the significance of one woman: Mrs Norris. Write a paper discussing her much-maligned role in the Battle of Hogwarts.
  55. A story about the lonely, never-useful life of Snape’s shampoo bottle.
  56. Rumour has it the new Defense against the Dark Arts teacher has already arrived and is hiding. Whoever finds them gets 500 points for their house.
  57. write the wizarding sex ed pamphlet that gets handed out to fifth years.
  58. everything’s the same except every character is a lizard.
  59. Describe the three trials in the next Triwizard Tournament.
  60. “Nobody knew about the fifth Hogwarts founder, and the secret they hid in the castle… until now”
  61. Minerva McGonagall is quite puzzled by Dumbledore’s recent hires for Defense Against the Dark Arts, and would like to have a serious talk with him about it.
  62. You decide to try flying on a broom just for shits and giggles. It works, and now you need help. A lot of help.
  63. The previous magical protection of the prime minister has been retired. You have taken their place.
  64. The Wizarding World decided it’s time to explore space.
  65. Doleres Umbridge is now the head teacher of Hogwarts and president Snow form panel is the minister for magic. They have reinvented the triwizard tournament to have aspects of the hunger games. Tell the story of this year’s tributes.
  66. “When I wished to be part of the world of Harry Potter, I was hoping for an acceptance letter to Hogwarts, not for the bridge I was crossing to be demolished by death eaters on my way home from work!”
  67. You are a squib from a long line of witches and wizards who has never made any contact with the Muggle world. Today is your first day of high school.
  68. Hermione blinked. “You’re right, Ron. I’ve been doing it wrong all this time.”
  69. Through a series of events, you land yourself in the world of Harry Potter. The catch? You’ve never read a word from the books and have absolutely no clue what’s going on.
  70. The entire series but everyone is emo as hell.
  71. You are Harry Potter’s less famous twin sibling. All you want is a quiet wizarding school life.
  72. Write the science behind magic.
  73. You are in the infamous library where no books have titles. Somehow, you pick up Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone. You want to help in any way you can.
  74. “The wand chooses the wizard” except this time three have chosen the same master. And they’re attempting to duel each other.
  75. Re-write one of the quidditch chapters from the perspective of the snitch.
  76. Harry being raised by Sirius and Remus because they actually caught Wormtail
  77. Dumbledore reads My Immortal and thinks it’s really good.
  78. “The Death Eaters stole this from the Muggles. What is it, Hermione?” “Ron, I…I think it’s a Nuke.”  "WICKED! Dad’s gonna love this!“
  79. Draco and Ron get in a wizard’s fight; Harry has to reveal his love for Draco by protecting him.
  80. While looking through Filch’s files of rescinded objects, you find something extremely dangerous. Just as you put it in your pocket for later investigation, you get caught by Peeves the poltergeist.
  81. A deaf Ravenclaw, a disabled Slytherin, a mute Gryffindor, and a black trans Hufflepuff help together to cope with each other’s’ problems.
  82. You’ve just received a Howler in front of the whole school. What does it say and how does the school react?
  83. A very derpy Dementor who doesn’t even try and suck souls, but just wants to be friends with everyone and gets sad easily so everyone has to cheer it up.
  84. As it turns out, Neville is the strongest wizard of all.
  85. Write a love story about Dumbledore and Grindelwald.
  86. Your boggart and your reflection in the Mirror of Erised show the same thing.
  87. Who maintains the enchanted ceiling at Hogwarts? How did they get the job and what’s their life like?
  88. Finally, Hogwarts gets its Wi-Fi hotspot.
  89. After a traumatising first year at Hogwarts, Ginny Weasley has to learn to deal with the long-term psychological effects of having been possessed by a dark wizard.
  90. Someone didn’t focus enough when trying to apparate somewhere and somehow wound up on Mars.
  91. You show someone the Mirror of Erised for the first time. You ask what they see, and they just look at you strangely. “What? Did you forget how mirrors work? I just see us.”
  92. A story written from the perspective of a student who died in the battle of Hogwarts, and is now a ghost there.
  93. Hogwarts wants to open a school in another part of the world.
  94. It’s been a hundred years, or so, and you’re still stuck in this dusty, shabby place. As a wand, it would be nice if you could finally choose the perfect wizard to wield you.
  95. You hide pictures of Voldemort in most  unusual places to freak other students out
  96. AU where all spells are imaginary. They’re basically running around with sticks yelling nonsense.
  97. The DA learned their most important lesson from Hermione - always bring a gun to a wand fight.
  98. Write about the day the magical world discovered internet (and proceeded to make their own WizNet)
  99. Harry Potter where Harry’s dad survived but is left emotionally destroyed by Voldemort’s attack.
  100. Harry Potter lowers his wand at himself. He swore he would rid the world of Horcruxes. He was about to make good on that promise.

 Let’s make a new list right away. Do you have a prompt for us?

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It must be illegal to look that good!

The Adrien Diaries...

6 Mar 2017

You know how I said I was going to be killed by the muffin man, Diary? Turns out, I was wrong… pretty sure at this point he’d settle for having me neutered. Well, maybe not Adrien Agreste…

…just the leather-clad superhero he caught KISSING HIS DAUGHTER TONIGHT!

Keep reading

The Adrien Diaries...

23 Feb 2017

I LICKED MARINETTE’S HAND!!!

And not just like, a single lick, nope– I straight up molested her hand with my tongue!

I didn’t mean to– she was passing my my seat this morning, as always.
And her hand swung past my face, AS ALWAYS.
And then my hand reaches out and grabs her hand and “as always” took a ill-timed vacation…

…right along with the part of my brain that tells me NOT TO LICK GIRL’S HANDS!


What’s worse, when I tried to apologize, Mari just said she would “talk to her dad” about it at lunch… HAVE YOU SEEN HER DAD!?


…I’m going to get beat to death by the muffin man.



-Adrien Soon-to-Be-Baked-Goods Agreste

I was re-watching Chamber of Secrets and when Harry is destroying Tom Riddle’s diary

Harry had no idea that the diary was a horcrux. He also had no idea that Basilisk fangs could destroy horcruxes. Or even that the fang would do any damage at all.

He was literally just doing it because he was pissed at Tom. Harry Potter destroyed a horcrux at 12 years old by sheer dumb luck.

And that’s basically a summary of the entire Harry Potter series.

Be our fan! Be our fan! Watch the episode again!

Lumiere:

Ma chere Mademoiselle, it is with deepest pride

and greatest pleasure that we welcome you tonight.

And now we invite you to relax, let us pull up a

chair as the dining room proudly presents -

your life ruiner!

Be our guest! Be our guest!

Put our plotpoints to the test

Hold your handkerchief to cheek, cherie

And we’ll provide the rest

Death du jour - 

Feels we feel!

Why, you know, this isn’t real!

Try to suffer

Chip:

It’s delicious

Lumiere:

Don’t believe me? We are vicious!

They can sing, they can dance

Most of all – they have no chance!

And a climax here is never second best

Go on, unfold your crush

Take a glance and – hush! -

Be our guest

Oui, our guest

Be our guest!

Lumiere and Chorus:

Fate ragout

Tears souffle

Souls and curses “en flambe”

Lumiere:

We’ll prepare and serve with flair

A tragicomic cabaret!

You’re alone

And you’re scared

But the story arch’s prepared

You are gloomy and complaining

While your woe is entertaining

We tell jokes, do a trick

You are helpless and you stick

Chorus:

And it’s all in perfect taste

That you can bet

Come on and lift your glass

You’ve won your own free pass

To be out guest

Lumiere:

If you’re stressed

It’s fine whining we suggest

Chorus:

Be our guest! Be our guest! Be our guest! 

Stop blaming Ron for leaving; there was a greater and more complex plot in there!!!

I have been wondering about this for ages. I mean seriously, was there less (unreasonable)Ron bashing in the internet for JKR to have provided fodder for the bad-mouthers, really? Was he really so very insecure that he could not take the life of a runaway as easily as Harry or Hermione did? Was Ron really weaker than the two?

Being an ardent Ron lover, I absolutely refuse to believe any of those and the hundred other foul things people spew about him. But there had to be a justification, right? After all, JKR has literally filled the books with secret clues that still keep cropping up. So was there something that was missing, an underlying clue, a hint perhaps?

Being an author really makes you think of a variety of scenarios, and while I understood that to break the monotony of three teenagers out on the run and completely cut-off from the world, something huge was needed– there seemed to be more to it. 

Look at it this way, the taboo on Voldemort’s name had to be introduced(although Ron had guessed it way earlier), the radio had to be brought into the scene, extra wands were required because Harry’s faithful wand needed to be broken for him to get more curious about the Elder Wand if nothing else.

And one of the three had to go out into the world and come back. Neither Harry nor Hermione had a place they could go to- it left only Ron to help their creator with the plot lines of the story, not to forget, dooming him to years of bashing for that act.

But that is not all. There is a reason and a pattern- a pattern that links each and every Horcrux with the one destined to destroy it.

The story always maintained that Horcruxes were the most evil of all evil objects. And seen with Tom Riddle’s Diary, the soul inside a Horcrux has the power to think, decide and execute plans by clever manipulations. And, by every means, it tries to save itself. How else can one explain why the piece of soul inside the diary suddenly changed its goal from killing Muggleborns to targeting Harry specifically?

My theory is that each Horcrux pulled the person who posed the greatest threat to its existence and tried to kill or dangerously maim him(or her).

Sounds far fetched? Read on for the pointers that support the idea. 

  1.  First Tom Riddle’s Diary- destroyed by Harry- Effects Ginny the most who is going to be Harry’s better half. The 16-year-old Tom Riddles accepts that he was targeting Harry through Ginny. Strange isn’t it? Salazar Slytherin is so adamant about ridding the school of muggleborns that he creates a monster to get his dream fulfilled, Voldemort leaves behind his sixteen-year-old self to finish his noble ancestor’s dream and the soul simply changes the centuries old plan? No, it guides Harry to, what it hoped, was Harry’s death. Because Harry posed the greatest threat to its existence. And it would have been successful if not for Fawkes.  
  2. Marvolo Gaunt’s Ring- destroyed by Dumbledore- Voldemort places the Horcrux with the one Hallow, the Resurrection Stone, that appeals the most to Dumbledore. Had it been the locket that Dumbledore found in the Gaunt house, it would not have endangered his life or affected him like that at all. He would not have been poisoned and would have lived. Dumbledore tries but fails to retrieve any other Horcrux except the one he was destined to destroy, except the one that had the capacity to lure him to his death.
  3. Slytherin’s Locket- destroyed by Ron- Here comes the main part. Although all the three wear it, it affects Ron the most, drives his insecurities to such heights that he leave the hunt, abandons his friends. That in itself is a pointer of what the Locket was doing to him. Ron was the one who was the rock solid backbone of the trio, the Locket makes him behave like someone else altogether. Will it be too far fetched to assume that the locket knew that Ron was the one who had the power to finish it and so tortured him the most to send him away? What if sending Ron away and breaking him from the trio was the sole target of the Locket? From the moment they possess it, Ron’s problems begin, he gets splinched and we know from the book that it was bad. And when they finally get the weapon to finish it, Harry is unable to retrieve the sword. I think, Harry was not destined to finish the locket at all. Otherwise, how was it that Snape found out about their location, not during those five weeks when Ron was away, but precisely after Ron had returned?
  4. Hufflepuff’s cup- destroyed by Hermione- All the clues are right in front of us. Where was it hidden? In Bellatrix’s vault, the one witch who tortured Hermione and almost got her killed. She chose not Harry neither Ron but Hermione. Still a coincidence?
  5. Nagini- destroyed by Neville (okay this one is a little symbolic but still ) - Neville’s greatest fear was Snape, the Head of the House of Snakes(Slytherin). He literally gets most of his injuries the year Snape is the Headmaster, the year the school is under a snake (Voldemort).
  6. Ravenclaw's Diadem- destroyed by Crabbe(Malfoy n Goyle)- They had been literally outside this very room the whole of their sixth year. This room gets the Death Eaters into the school and sets the ball rolling. During the Battle of Hogwarts, they confront Harry here, although it could have been any place in the castle or the grounds. It could have happened when Harry was alone, but no. They wait till he enters the room where the Horcrux is hidden?  It is as if the Diadem literally pulls Crabbe to a place where he meets his death.
  7. And last but not the least- part inside Harry- destroyed by Voldemort- No questions here that Harry was the biggest trouble Voldemort ever had. Had he not been so paranoid about finishing Harry he might have actually lived because no one would find out about his Horcruxes in the first place! Harry is literally like a magnet pulling Voldemort to himself. In all the years since his first defeat, Voldemort manages to find a supporter in Quirrell but as his rotten luck would have it, it's the time Harry starts school. Had it been before, he might have actually managed to get a hand on the stone. The part inside Harry was literally pulling him to itself to finish him.

Ron does not leave because he is weak, he leaves because that is how the Horcrux can hurt him most, taking him away from his best friend, away from the girl he loves.

The Aftermath Addendums

March 6th   ‘17

WHY!  The ONE TIME I need my camera, and of course my phone died on me! I mean… I’m a good person… a decent person… I’m not CHLOE!

And how do the journalistic gods reward me?


ONE PICTURE– I managed to get ONE STUPID PICTURE.
It’s simply not fair.

I guess I should be grateful though… I DID get one picture.

It even came in pretty clear… and OH does Marinette have a lot to answer for…


…because WHAT was HE even doing there, and WHY was her dad chasing him down with a rolling pin?

Authored by: Alya Cesaire, Aspiring Journalist, Owner of the LadyBlog