I was headed to work today, looked at
the date, and realized today is the day, two years ago, that I full immersed
myself in all that is CrissColfer and began to tip toe my way into this fandom.
And what a crazy, fun, interesting, frustrating, sometimes sad trip it has
been. I think you all know, I consider
myself, prior to finding this world, a naïve New Yorker. I was a fan of Glee,
Klaine, and Chris and Darren for the entire duration of the show. But I never thought
to look closer. It simply did not make sense to me that Hollywood would force
an actor into the closet who was playing an openly gay character on TV.
And so I accepted the narratives that were sold. Chris was
dating a guy named Will that I really did not know much about aside from a few
pictures and that Darren was very straight and had a girlfriend named Mia.
While I was a fan of Glee and Klaine, I had no idea what fandom was. Sure, I
was often reading the message boards on the Glee Forum, quick to read any
spoilers as they pertained to our favorite couple. I will say, I would
sometimes fall upon appreciation post of miarren and I could never really
understand what there was to admire. Despite the fact that I believed it was
real, and again, didn’t give it more than a passing glance, it always seemed
off. Something seemed wrong. It started with a pic from Joey Richter’s
Easter celebration at his parents. There
was a possessiveness to the photo that made me feel extremely uncomfortable and
from that day forward, whenever a picture was posted of the PR duo, I really
questioned the chemistry and the intimacy. But again, I didn’t look any
Then on March 24, 2015, the infamous twitter hack
occurred. Being a curious person, when I
read the tweet, I was instantly curious. After all, not too long before, it
appeared that both Lea and Chris had been hacked and it led me to wonder what
Darren had tweeted. And upon googling I
discovered what all the fuss was about:
Now my interest was piqued. Why would one bother to tweet, “twitter
hacked trying to resolve” about something as innocent as a favorite. I cannot
tell you how many times I have accidently touched that icon. It seemed silly
and ridiculous and not worth the mention and so, I started to slowly explore.
March is traditionally my busiest season at work. For those who practice employment based immigration,
this is our tax season or what I “lovingly” refer to as my version of March
Madness. Its long days, stressful, and
at least 6 days a week. So I put my research aside until Sunday, March 29. A
day where I was utterly exhausted and decided a lazy day of research was
exactly what I needed. And well, I never turned back.
I spent hours that day discovering this crazy world called
tumblr. Reading master posts. Discovering the main CC blogs. And by the end of the day, I had read enough and
seen enough to know that all was not as it appears.
And I entered the world of fandom. Something I was not prepared for and had no
idea what it was all about. Sure, I have always been a fan. As a child it
started with Duran Duran and moved to my complete obsession with all things
INXS. Since that it has taken many
turns, sometimes more music, British actors, sports, theater, and of course Glee.
But never did I experience anything like this.
And so I started my own blog.
With the sole intention of reblogging things that were interesting and
following the people that seemed to have insightful and interesting things to
say, with the intention of remaining quiet. Just observing.
I have no idea how I started with that and ended up here,
someone who is a pretty strong and vocal voice in this community. It happened
gradually, starting with a post about the TLOS and the acknowledgments to where
I stand today. And it has been such an
insane and crazy ride. And I wouldn’t change making the choice to be here.
Over the past two years, I have personally talked to so many
of you. I have had the pleasure of meeting a few of you at events like Elsie
and Broadway Con. I have even had the pleasure of traveling to LA and San Fran
with some of you. Just last night there
was dinner and a little singing to celebrate the birthday of one of the very
first people I ever spoke to in this fandom.
I am so very grateful for all of you, whether we agree or disagree. Whether we talk a lot or on occasion. It has
taught me a lot. And has often shaped my opinion.
And of course, the reason we are all here- Chris and
Darren. Two men I have my complete
admiration. I may not always agree with their actions, but I think considering
what they have been handed, they have handled this burden incredibly and
I think you all know that I am one of those that firmly
believes in CC. That they have been a couple for years and I have seen enough
that I do not waiver in my beliefs. I think a large part of why I decided to
write so much more is because I think it is so important that people learn
about the reality of Hollywood. And how
the constraints that are placed on actors have a profound impact on their
I often field like I want to take them and shield them under
my wing. And if I feel that way, I can only imagine how their families feel. I
often wonder if Cerena cries at night and the nightmare that her son in
particular has endured. And it has
touched me in a way I cannot explain. And that is why I continue to be here and
support them regardless of whether I agree or disagree.
Anyway, I was just feeling a little nostalgic today and I
felt the need to write it down. Here’s
to hoping that the journey ahead becomes smoother and a little less tortured and
that these men start their journey towards the light. As I have said, I have no idea what their
plan is for the future or how long it will be until we ultimately get to the
truth, if we ever completely get it, but I will continue to be a supportive
voice through it all. And if I can convince one person to see the truth and
start to support the real Darren and Chris than I will feel that I have
accomplished something small.
And if perchance my words ever reach them, I will smile
knowing that perhaps my support meant something to them personally.
The slick cobblestones slipped under foot as you
hurried your way to the rickety almost crumbling library, in the light drizzle
that often hung around diagon alley. Hopping up the shallow stone steps, and
into the cosy warm library, the comforting scent of old books filling your
nostrils as you ran your fingers gently over the spines of the precious books,
the heels of your shoes tip tapping on the worn stone floor, as you made your
way to the familiar herbology section.
You scanned the shelves, looking for the book that you needed for your
You strained your neck, looking to the higher shelves, with a sigh you
spotted the acid green leather of the cover. On your very tip toes you reached
up, your fingers a breath away from grazing the well-thumbed tomb of information.
“can I get that for you?’ a soft voice asked, as you turned, you found
that the owner of the voices was rather handsome in his unusualness. With windswept
auburn curls hanging in beautiful sea green eyes, freckles stood stark against his
pale skin, one in particular drew your attention, it sat comfortably at the corner
of his full lips.
You could feel your cheeks heating up, as you cleared your throat realising
that you were staring at this kind stranger. “yes please, if it’s not too much trouble,’
you mumbled a little embarrassed by having
to ask for help from a stranger, ‘it’s not a bother’ the gentleman reassured,
as he easily grabbed the book that stood high above your head.
He passed the book to you, with a lopsided smile, his long fingers just
brushing against your own. A light blush spread across his cheeks , ‘I’ve read
that book a few times, was there something in particular that you wanted to
find?’ that smile that you found oh so enchanting never leaving his lips.