todd killings

Everyone:

“Joker is so funny!!1!1!! 🤣🤣🤣 He’s one of my favorite villains because he’s not even a real bad guy lolz he’s just a weirdo hahaha 👏👏👏 He’s so funny and random I love how quirky he is 😍😍😍😍😍 I hate how people say the Joker is a bad person he’s just a funny weirdo 😝😝😝”

Joker:

*Beat 15 year old Jason Todd to death with a crowbar*

*Abused and emotionally manipulated poor Harley for years*

*Shot Barbara Gordon in the spine and paralyzed her before stripping her naked and taking photos in an effort to drive Jim Gordon insane*

*Once skinned a man alive out of spite*

*In Injustice, tricked Superman into brutally murdering Lois Lane - the love of his life - as well as their unborn child*

*Literally shaved his own face off and wore it as a mask for what reason???*

*Raped a woman just to get back at her husband*

*Blew up a school building full of innocent children*

*Tortured and brainwashed 13 year old Tim Drake and turned him into Joker Jr., which deeply traumatized him to the point of having a mental breakdown*

*Literally everything that happened during the dinner scene in Death of the Family*

7

favorite comic character meme ✦  [1/3] platonic relationships: bruce wayne

“But the whole truth was obvious. Bruce liked having Jason out here.”

Do the Gotham Rogues even lift, bro?

Harley Quinn: lifts her gf all the time with her strong and powerful arms

Poison Ivy: doesn’t lift a lot, prefers to use her plants for that nonsense.

Catwoman: lifts regularly. She doesn’t enjoy it but she knows it’s necessary for her line of work. Loves to shoplift tho

Joker: he constantly lifts the weight of his sins.

Riddler: he compulsively bought a shake weight while watching a bad Spanish soap opera at 3:00am, but he’s never used it

Killer Croc: has a membership to Planet fitness- yes, he lifts THAT much

Penguin: he lifts all the time. His arms are ripped and he can barely walk with all his bulging muscles. Dude I’m joking. This man never lifted a thing in his life

Scarecrow: has lifted exactly one (1) time when he was visiting the Riddler- he found a dusty shake weight in the corner and got curious

Mr. Freeze: lifts fairly regularly if lifting massive blocks of ice counts. In the past he’d lift Nora into his arms and spin around, laughing happily

Two-Face: One of his arms is shredded one of them is boneless. He lifts, but at what cost?

Bane: does he lift, bro? Does he LIFT, bro!! Is Bruce Wayne rich? Is Superman an alien? Did Jimmy Olsen deserve better in BvS??? Bro, he LIFTS.

Mad Hatter: I don’t think this man knows what lifting is

Bonus!!

Red Hood: (he’s not a rogue but it’s my post I do what I want) He lifts. He lifts himself over walls and buildings as he desperately attempts to escape Bruce’s Love and Respect

Renamed Musicals
  • • Les Miserables: Breadsticks Meme Gone Wrong ft. The Only Cop in France.
  • • Miss Saigon: Americans Fuck Shit Up, the musical!
  • • Legally Blonde: This is Harvard, not a Stripper Bar.
  • • Wicked: Misunderstood Green Girl and Sparkly Witch Hide Lesbian Feelings
  • • Little Women: That Story Where All the Girls Fall in Love
  • • Book of Mormon: Spooky Mormon Hell and Crude Gay Humor Clash w/ Sparkly Tuxedoes.
  • • Shrek: Don’t Judge a Book By It’s Cover; Another Show About Diversity.
  • • The Last Five Years: How Not to Adult: A Manual
  • • Joseph and the blah, blah, blah: Fifty Shades of Bible Humor
  • • Suessical: Always Trust that Weird Voice you Hear PS Elephants Can’t Fly
  • • Songs for a New World: I’m Sure There’s a Story Here Somewhere…
  • • Thirteen: Puberty Sucks Plus Jewish Jokes and Weird Sexual Tension
  • • Matilda: We’ll Fight Like Twenty Armies and We Won’t Give up ft. Miss Honey’s Self Esteem Issues.
  • • Spring Awakening: Why Sex Ed Matters, the musical!
  • • Next to Normal: The Story of a Sexy Ghost
  • • Avenue Q: Horney Puppets Use the Internet for Porn and Then Build a School For Monsters.
  • • Children of Eden: Bible fanfiction.
  • • The Drowsy Chaperone: Hallucinations of a Man in a Chair
  • • Violet: Sutton Foster and a Sob Story ft. Indecipherable Accents
  • • Anything Goes: Into the Woods, Except on a Ship
  • • How to Succeed: A Dummies Guide to Making an Ass Out of
  • Yourself
  • • Once on this Island: Why Gods Should Not Interfere With Humans
  • • Into the Woods: Fairytale AU on Crack
  • • Fun Home; Gay Tears, the musical!
  • • In the Heights: Everybody has Issues in the Barrio.
  • • Chess: East West Relations Under Different Masks and Various Plots
  • • RENT: Diversity, Death, and Drugs.
  • • Annie: My Life Sucks: By Me.
  • • Sweeny Todd: Revenge Means Killing Everybody
  • • Young Frankenstein: It Runs in the Family.
  • DC: hey this is Jason. He was the second Robin and he was super angsty and disobedient and died for not following orders. He totally deserved it. He's alive now tho...
  • Me: *finds old comics with young Jason saying being Robin made him magic, Bruce giving him a piggy back ride, Jason being excited about a field trip to a museum, disobeying the least of any of the Robin's-except maybe Duke- saving his mom's live instead of his own...* Ding dong you are wrong
Batboys playing Mario Kart

*screen is split 4 ways*

Dick: Who the hell picked Rainbow Road? All these damn colors are making my eyes hurt–and that’s the second time I’ve fallen into space!

Jason: Damian did. 

Damian: It’s better than the Haunted Mansion Tim wanted. The roads in that place are all edges!

Tim: At least that Chomp thing isn’t there. I’ve run into that guy every time I’ve seen him!

Jason: That’s because you suck. Shit! Not another fucking bomb!

Dick: I was playing this before you guys were even born. I am a god at this game.

Jason: Dick, shut up. You’re in last place.*gets a question mark* *question mark gives him a golden mushroom* This has to be the most useless fucking one. *repeatedly presses the ‘Z’ button* All it does it is jump me back and forth like I’m fucking glitching! 

Dick: You just don’t know how to use it.

Jason: Strong words from someone playing as Yoshi. *gold mushroom launches him over the edge and into space* Well fuck you too, Wario,

Dick: Yoshi is lovable just like me. Besides, everyone knows Wario is just the asshole reject of the family. *gasps* Did you do that on purpose?

Tim: Dammit, Damian. Quit with the fucking turtle shells!

Damian: That wasn’t me!

Tim: I can see your screen!

Damian: STOP SCREEN CHEATING!

Tim: STOP HITTING ME WITH RED TURTLE SHELLS!

Damian: THE GAME KEEPS GIVING THEM TO ME!

Jason: Which one of you fuckers hit me with a red turtle shell?

Tim: That would be Princess Peach over there with her endless fucking supply.

Damian: I picked the wrong player! You three douchebags wouldn’t let me change it!

Tim: Oh, but this suits you so much better. 

Damian: Whatever, Mario.

Tim: This game exists because of Mario.

Damian: This game exists for you to be anyone but Mario. 

Dick: I got a star! Eat dust bitches! *passes everyone up* *falls off the edge into space* *gets put back in last* God dammit. 

Tim: What’s with all the fucking banana peels, Jason?

Jason: You tell me, Mr. “I strategically placed upside down question marks everywhere to inflict maximum casualties.”

Tim: You have no proof that was me.

Jason: I saw you on your screen!

Tim: You screen cheated?

Damian: Doesn’t feel so good does it?

Tim: Can it, Peach.

Damian: Wow, what a clever pun. Did you strategically place that too?

Tim: I’m gonna strategically punch you in the face.

Dick: It’s so nice and drama free in last place.*laughs evilly to himself*

Damian: Have fun trying to hit me while I’m pelting you with red turtle shells!

Tim: *gets a question mark* Not if I have some turtle shells of my own. *question mark gives him the squid that puts an ink blot on his screen* Aw hell.

Damian: *laughs loudly* That’s some defense you got there. 

Tim: I can’t see shit! *slips on Jason’s banana peels*

Jason: *is in 1st place* *hears a blue turtle shell coming* Is that a blue turtle shell? Tim and Damian, shut the hell up. I said, is that a blue turtle shell?

Tim and Damian: *both get out of the way of the blue turtle shell*

Jason: *gets hit the blue turtle shell* WHO THE FUCK SENT A BLUE TURTLE SHELL?

Dick: *more evil laughter*

Tim: It was Dick.

Damian: Did you screen cheat to find that out too?

Tim: This is Mario Kart. They literally show you where everyone is on a map! THERE IS NO SCREEN CHEATING!

Damian: YOU WEREN’T SAYING THAT WHEN JASON DID IT TO YOU!

Dick: I’m coming for you Jason.

Jason: Get the fuck away from me, Dick. Take your blue turtle shells, and get. The fuck. Away.

Jason, Tim and Damian: *get electrocuted*

Dick: *passes them all up*

Jason: NO!

Tim: Damian, I swear to God, if that question mark gives you a red turtle shell–

Damian: Let me pass you, and this won’t be a problem.

Tim: No.

Damian: Then feel my red, fiery wrath! *shoots more red turtle shells at Tim*

Tim: You sadistic little–

Dick: Told you I was a god at this game. *is seconds away from winning in 1st place*

Jason: *presses ‘start’ and ‘restart race’ a millisecond before Dick crosses the finish line*

Dick: *gasps* YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! *throws his controller at Jason*

Jason: *ducks*

Tim: *gets hit by the controller*

Damian: Too bad you couldn’t have screen cheated to know that was coming.

Tim: *attacks Damian*

Dick: *attacks Jason*

*10 minutes later*

Bruce: You were playing Mario Kart. Mario Kart, boys. Grand Theft Auto doesn’t even make you this violent.  Why is Tim’s nose bleeding?

Dick: It’s Monopoly all over again. It all started because Jason cheated.

Tim: *holding a tissue to his nose* Dick threw a controller at me–well, at Jason, but it hit me.

Damian: Serves you right, screen cheater.

Tim: I will bleed on you.

Jason: You shot a blue turtle shell at me. What was I supposed to do?

Dick: Take it like a man is what you’re supposed to do! You want to know what you’re not supposed to do? RESTART THE RACE JUST BECAUSE YOU’RE LOSING!

Bruce: Why is this my life?


This is pretty much exactly what happens when my fam plays Mario Kart. We get everyone together for a nice, friendly game of racing with funny attack methods, and it turns into a bloodbath. I’ve been every one of these. I’ve come close to killing most of my siblings–ESPECIALLY when they screen cheat. I hate that crap. I just ruins the game. And of course I’ve been a sore loser and either restarted the race or turned the console off before someone else won. I’ve bitten my brother before for hitting me with a blue turtle shell, and he once shattered our tv screen by humming his controller at it because he was playing against the CPU and Peach kept hitting him with red turtle shells. Good times.

Aight but where’s Jason at tho?
—  Me every time DC releases anything