to the shit

Magic hand can be used for nut punches

So we were in a close quarters fight, our rogue gave up his awesome plan to throw an oil soaked net on top of the group we were fighting and then lighting it on fire to punch a guy in the nuts with his magic hand.

Rogue: “I use my magic hand to punch that guy in the nuts to make him drop his weapon.”

Everyone else ooc: “No go with your other plan, you’re going to waste your attack!”

DM: “Okay, roll an attack.”

Rogue: “…I rolled a nat 20.”

DM: *after laughing for a solid 5 minutes* “Okay, you punch him in the nuts for 3 damage. He screams and drops to the ground. He drops his weapon to put his hands over his nuts.”

a comprehensive list of arguments chloe and marinette have had
  • do horizontal stripes make you look fat
  • ponytails v. pigtails
  • was the class rep election rigged
    • half this argument took place in mme. bustier’s office when chloe dragged marinette inside and demanded a recount
  • is adrien warm toned or cool toned?
  • who sits closer to adrien in class?
    • rulers and tape measures were brought to class
  • fishtail braids v. french braids
  • gel manicures v. matte manicures
  • whether erin should’ve won project runway season 15
  • which one of them was taller
    • sub-argument: do high heels and up-dos count towards your height
  • proper form for a backhanded slap
  • problem #13 on the maths group project they were unfortunately paired together for
    • this one both got them sent to the principal’s office
  • the exact number of akumas chloe has inadvertently caused
  • ladybug’s precise mbti 
    • still going on after two weeks. marinette is oddly invested in this one
  • rose gold v. gold iphones
  • is jagged stone even considered music 
  • whether blackmailing their history teacher to give chloe an extension on her paper is considered “politics”
    • it isn’t. chloe got a note sent home to her father. 
  • which season of the bachelor was objectively the best 
  • what is chat noir’s suit really made out of 
  • who had the highest score on the last history exam 
    • also got them sent to the principal’s office 
  • who has the best resting bitch face
  • who has the better best friend
    • sabrina and alya refuse to involve themselves

you have more hands than a child
trying to catch the cool rain / which,
in february, holds just a second too
long in the sky / as if deciding whether
or not it’s time to come down. or

if this is another day for staying in
bed. & you say / “not everything is
pathetic fallacy / the weather is not
about you / the sky is not always
about you.” / & maybe not but I’m not

the only one who prays for winter
anymore. when I talk about grey
clouds / I picture you on my window-
seat / a replica marble david we
had to break in half to fit inside
the display case. & I try and talk

about the window even though we
both know there’s nothing to say.
just like how / when the snow
piles up past the door you can
turn the handle / but there’s nowhere
to go. I want to talk about the dark

& the colour & the faint
blue of your fingertips. / but you
remind me of something you did
last night / when the ice was just
starting to form and the coldest

place in the house / was the 3
centimeters between my reaching
hand and your broad back. you like
the sternum before the first incision
& the oak before acorns start to

grow. you climbed out of bed in the
untouched morning to look at something
pure. listen to me—I’m trying to tell you
something important / about how
much this youngness hurts.

Eliel Vera, My Last Thought Before We Skidded Off The Road
for the prompt “driven snow”, @nepenthenet

anonymous asked:

maybe not everyone wants to be vegan! did you ever think of that? maybe you should stop putting your belief system and opinions on other people.... the way certain religious groups do. could YOU be doing more to accept other people's right to not want to go vegan? if other people's eating habits etc. aren't hurting YOU then you should stay out of it 🤗

maybe not everyone wants to stop beating puppies! did you ever think of that? maybe you should stop putting your belief system and opinions on other people…. the way certain religious groups do. could YOU be doing more to accept other people’s right to beat puppies? if other people’s beating habits etc. aren’t hurting YOU then you should stay out of it 🤗

First digital art I’ve done in about 3+ years, I think. Still figuring out a bunch of things (it took me over an hour to even set up my tablet at all and actually get drawing), but here’s a test sketch of Lyn!

hahahahahhahahahahhahahahahaha why is Max being. So mean :) what the fuck :) shadowhunters writers :) who :) gave :) you :) the :) right :)