to steal yo man

anonymous asked:

dan referred to emiliano as 'mr. steal-yo-man' aka not straight

im glad i can always rely on dan to continuously erase heteronormativity but its also.. interesting.. how his mind doesnt automatically default to a heterosexual situation and would rather settle for something not straight instead..

Climon make way for Saphael

Simon and Clary walk together at night alone, when all of a sudden a very scary vampire walks up to them. The vampire is Raphael. He’s drunk.

Raphael: This MIsTer gonna steal yo mAn
Clary: I don’t think that’s how the song goes-
Raphael: *proceeds to grab Simon and runs away*
Simon: *distant shrieking*

anonymous asked:

I saw you share seasons post about Percival's wife not caring the the'd changed into Grindelwald because the sex was suddenly good. Can you write that prompt?

((WARNING: Percival is Dead in this.  If that’s too much, please don’t read. Reference to sex w/ a teenager. No details, there.  Oh @seasons-gredence I hope it’s okay for me to steal yo shit))

He was a hungry man.  He’d spent a month as a portly railroad worker in Germany.  A few weeks as an elderly, miserly woman in France.  A handful of days as a dying man on a dock named “Legless Joe.”  He’d transfigured himself as they were dying, taking over their property, identity, and relationships.  And he’d been nearly starved by the lack of attention.

For no one’s eyes lingered on portly laborers, elderly women in rags, or homeless men that couldn’t walk.  Those kinds of people lived in the shadows.  They were the perfect people to be in order to silently move from country to country.  When “Legless Joe” told his drinking buddies he wanted to get on a ship for one last hoorah, they’d scraped up the money and false papers for him.  Joe hadn’t been a criminal himself, but he had friends in low places. 

Grindelwald had made it to America with little upset.  Immediately turned into a pretty lady… the kind of lady that could be a wealthy man’s secretary.  She couldn’t get into MACUSA headquarters, but she could snoop in most other buildings with no questions asked.  Just carrying a notebook and marching with purpose.

This identity had a spotlight.  Men leered.  Women let their eyes linger, shy and nervous about their attraction.  Children asked if he were a princess.  Merlin, he’d missed being beautiful.

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