to kill a homestuck

Homestuck Tips for First Time Readers:

  • Act 3 is when it starts getting good during your first read
  • The pesterlogs are long, but they’re important
  • The Midnight Crew intermission is also important, but not enjoyable the first time you read it, especially if you have trouble following circular time travel plots.  It’s much funnier the second time around, I promise
  • The Exiles are not enjoyable the first time.  They grow on you, don’t worry (and they’re funnier during Read #2)
  • When you reach Act 5 and meet the trolls, you may become irrationally angry that you just got used to the 4 kids and now you have to meet and like 12 more characters?  Fuck this and fuck you Hussie I’m not reading this comic anymore these feelings are normal and expected
  • Take your time with the interactive games, they’re full of easter eggs that are plot relevant
  • Sometimes Hussie just fucks with you
  • Have fun and go at your own pace

congratulations! it is now Legal to say ‘Homestuck’ out loud for 24 hours!*

*available 4 times per person , every time you go over the limit hussie moves the date of hiveswap’s release an extra year away and kills off another fuckig nepeta 

So my friend and I were talking about old homestuck fans who inspired us and made us laugh back in the good ol’ days and if caused me to make this
So here you go! Enjoy

@paperseverywhere: Actually working/worked on hiveswap! Stuck with us until the end

Dante: A sweetheart who keeps us updated, vaguely, but still updated

@kyleehenke: Can be found behind an abandoned block busters at 4:13 in the morning only if you play “you can’t fight the homestuck” at full volume, but beware, she will run at sonic speeds with full determination, killing you instantly

@toastyhat: Was really creative and inspiring. Also worked on homestuck a little bit. No longer draws it as much but still an old friend of the fans

@miraculoustang: Similar to kylee except only they can be summoned behind a fudruckers while you play all of their “terepy” videos simultaneously.

@octosmagiccastle: Voiced elevatorstuck then left us on read for a couple years before finally explaining he moved on from homestuck Understandably.

@mcsiggy: a sinful scallawag who no longer draws as much homestuck but still enjoys it, landing them in the “lawful” section.

@ikimaru: “What the fuck is a hometruck???” Still has a jake icon.

Hussie: Abandoned us after jane was fucking kidnapped and exploded on a fucking moon and won’t give us answers or hiveswap. fucker.