to ask how I was doing and how my mom was

anonymous asked:

My mom is making me wear a dress to homecoming. I'm out to her, and I've expressed my hatred towards what she wants me to wear, but she said I had to wear a dress, so I got a cheap one. The thing is, I thought I could handle the dysphoria. Just one night, right? I fell asleep on the bus today and someone put makeup on me while I was sleeping. When I opened the camera on my phone later to fix my hair, I saw, and had a horrible panic attack. How do I tell her that I can't handle wearing a dress?

Sometimes the thought of something can be ok but the reality isnt, and vice versa as well. It may just be one night but I personally couldnt, and wouldnt, either. If you are out to her she should have some understanding of that. What exactly is her reasoning for you ‘having’ to wear it? Its an event for you not her so why does it matter to her how you dress. There are cis females who wear suits so why cant you if you want to. Its not that uncommon these days. You should be able to dress how you are comfortable, not forced into something you dont want which could potentially ruin the entire thing for you. Just tell her how you feel and why. She doesnt have to personally get it to respect what you want. Try to explain how dysphoria affects you like that example you just gave. Something that can seem so insignificant can have big effects on us and they tend to not understand or even really think about that. You should be allowed to enjoy the night without having to deal with that. If it comes to it though you could always leave in it and get changed when you get there if someone else could get it for you or keep it in a locker or something so you dont have to be in it all night. I hope you can reason with her though and get her to let you dress how you are comfortable

WHEN MY FAMILY DISCOVERS I DO NOT LOVE
THE WAY THEY TAUGHT ME TO LOVE


When my mother asks Are you gay? I tell her I am
sorry. When she asks How can you possibly love
something that looks just like you do?


I wonder how long she has hated herself.

My sister shakes me by the shoulders and says:

Mom will never be the mother you need her
to be. She cannot give you the love

you deserve to receive.


This is something I am trying to accept.

My mom insists she doesn’t mind the glitter, just
the mess it’s left all over the house. She doesn’t mind
my sexuality, just how it sticks to the furniture.

She is not angry at me- just exhausted.

Now, there is so much to clean
before we have company.
—  WHEN MY FAMILY DISCOVERS I DO NOT LOVE THE WAY THEY TAUGHT ME TO LOVEby Blythe Baird
Me and my mother go out for coffee. We are sitting at the table when I ask her,
‘Do you think it’s possible to wake up one day and realize that you’ve stopped loving the person you spent the last two decades of your life with?’
She stops what she’s doing and she says, ‘It happens. Except it doesn’t happen the way you think it does.’
I take a sip from my coffee mug.
‘Then how does it happen?’
'It happens slowly. Just like it takes time to learn love, it takes time to forget it.’
'How do you forget what you never had?’ She’s looking at me wide eyed now.
I tell her, 'If you wake up one day and realize that you have stopped loving, then you never really loved at all. Love doesn’t just become a past, and even for the many times it does, it is always a present too, you know? It’s the kind of thing you always carry around with you.’
I stop talking after that and my mother spills her coffee. Her hands are shaking and in her gaze, I know that she is trying to find the right words to tell me that love is fucked up like that sometimes. That I am right. That it stays, even when it can’t.
'Whoever it is that you love, is going to be lucky. You’re going to do it right darling, and every single time after the first is going to be better, because when everyone else forgets you’re going to remember.’
She reaches over the table and takes my hands, 'Love only hurts if you let it, so you might as well wear it like your favorite dress. It’s always going to look beautiful on you. Like maybe love was something made to fit girls with warrior hearts and bravery louder than their mothers, like yours- perfectly.’
—  For Girls With Warrior Hearts and Bravery Louder Than Their Mothers// thewordsyouneverunderstood

some1: why do you like kpop so much??
me, internally: i love everything about it! the teamwork, the relationships, how hard all of the members work individually and together. i don’t like how hard it is for all of them, but i love how they manage to get through it together. i love how much idols appreciate and adore their fans and how much fans appreciate and adore their idols. i love the range of music and talents. how even though i don’t understand the words i can still understand the emotions and relate to the songs. i like kpop so much because of how much it inspires me, makes me happy, draws me closer to others, and gives me something to be passionate about
me: …i like the music

EXO's reaction to your son saying "Mom is better looking than you, Daddy"!

Baekhyun

“I can’t believe what things mommy taught you…”

Chanyeol

“He has my sense of humour…”

Chen

*turns into duckling* “How can you say that to your real father?”

DO

“Ooh my heart! You hurt my heart!”

Kai

“Bad news for you then, little fellow, because you look exactly like me!”

Kris

“Aishhh…” *thinks how to bribe him into thinking differently*

Lay

“Of course she is! That’s why I chose her to be your mommy!” *catches his nose*

Luhan

“Thank you God he didn’t say manlier…”

Sehun

“I thought we talked about lying, mister…”

Suho

“I taught you well, my man!”

Tao

“Just look at him trying to wind himself into somebody’s affection…”

Xiumin

“But Daddy is funnier, right?”

I use to work for a small design firm that did a lot of Mom & Pop sites. This one time we did a website for a mechanic shop.

Client: One of our mechanics is very artistic so he’ll be doing the design and sending it over.

Weeks pass and we get swamped so we totally forget about this design being sent until the owner calls wondering if the site is done.

Me: We still haven’t received the design from your mechanic. I apologize for not following up with you about it.

Client: (annoyed) We sent it just a few days after I spoke with you!

I double check my emails and even check to see if it was sent by mail and still nothing. I call the owner back and ask how he sent it.

Client: Fax of course! That’s how all you tech people do things isn’t it!?

I didn’t even know we had a fax machine, but eventually I found it in a storage room (still plugged in and working) with 5 inches of dust on it. Sure enough, there was the faxed design! In the end, the fax was so low quality and the design was so bad, we didn’t end up using it anyways. 

he didn’t ask to be thunder
or to lose the girl
or to wear the crown.

he promises that when she comes back,
he’ll hate her and
his wrath will break the bones
of their forest,

and he’ll curse the day
she ever gave him
something to lose.

he practices how he’ll
say her name like it’s burning
his tongue and how he’ll
walk away from her more
metaphorically than not.

he stares at the night and recites,
this is on you and recites,
we were in this together and recites,
you are blood and regret and nothing i need.

[mom, what do you think patroclus said to achilles
when he found him in another life?]

knees buckled and eyes closed, he recites,
i’ve missed you.

—  bellamy || naiche lizzette
I’m 16 and I’m pregnant. My mother doesn’t believe in abortion. What do I do?

Someone asked us:

I’m 16 and pregnant. I hate to say it but I wasn’t smart when it came to protection. The problem is, my mom doesn’t believe in abortion. What are my options. I’m so scared that I’m going to be forced to have a baby I’m not ready for. I’m 16. I don’t even have a drivers license yet. How am I suppose to raise a baby. My mom is very unsupportive. How am I going to do this?! What are my options. If I do have to have this baby what can I do?? I’m so scared. I feel like my life is falling apart.

I know that’s hard to believe right now, but you’ll get through this. You’re in a tough situation — no doubt about it. But you’re already reaching out for help. That’s a great first step, and we’re here to help you.

When you’re in a situation that feels overwhelming it helps to take things one step at a time. It sounds like the first thing you need to do is talk with someone in person about your options. You seem pretty sure that your mother doesn’t believe in abortion and wouldn’t support you if you wanted to have one. I can’t tell from your message what exactly you want to do — if you want to keep the pregnancy and become a parent, have an abortion, or give the baby for adoption — but if talking with your mother won’t be helpful, talking with the staff at your nearest Planned Parenthood health center will be. First they can talk through your options with you, and then get you started on the right option for you depending on what you decide (prenatal care or abortion).

If you want to have an abortion, you may not need your mother’s permission. That depends somewhat on where you live. Some states don’t require permission from your parents at all. Other states do. But even most of those states have a way for you to have an abortion without a parent or guardian. That process is called judicial bypass: It’s when a judge says it’s okay for you to get an abortion without involving your parents in your decision.

It may sound scary, but the staff at your nearest Planned Parenthood health center can help with that process. So call them and make an appointment.

Once you’ve made your appointment, your second step is to find a way to get there. You said that you don’t have a driver’s license. For that and other practical reasons, you may need to let someone in your life that you trust know what’s going on, someone who can give you a ride. Otherwise, can you walk or take public transportation? Can you take a taxi? The health center staff you speak with on the phone may have some suggestions or directions for getting there.

The rest of the steps you need to take are going to depend on what you decide to do. But remember, the staff at your nearest Planned Parenthood health center will help you every step of the way.

Last piece of advice: don’t delay! If you’re pregnant, regardless of whether you’re going to have an abortion or stay pregnant, it’s important to get started on that path ASAP, to make sure you stay healthy. You can do this!

-Emily at Planned Parenthood

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That’s none of our business

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HEY GUYS im here finally with the updated commission post ive been meaning to do forever…..a couple things have changed, mostly my arts gotten better so ive updated all the examples (check out my art tag for more) but whats still happening is….i am fucking broke; me and my mom and sister are living paycheck to paycheck and i really need to start making more money from my art….even a couple bucks helps so even if you can’t commission me pls reblog this post and get the word out tysm <3

also consider checking out my patreon for Extra Exclusive Content ;^))

(how to commission me/details under the cut)

Keep reading

At school today one of my classmates, a woman maybe twice my age, watched me do a theatrical makeup demo for the presalon class.

I used a pair of whiteout lenses on my model to complete the look, and the woman (like many other) went on, raving about them and how crazy and scary they were. The woman called me over and asked me where she could get them, and I gave her a circle lens website and my discount code and all that, and then she continued telling me about how her daughter LOVED ‘gothic stuff’ like crazy lenses. She said her daughter was 12.
I told her that she was a 'cool mom’ and supportive of such a non-conventional thing for a twelve year old, and she went on to say the best thing ever. She said:

“Well, the thing is, it’s not my life! It’s her life, and as her mother and as someone who loves her I want her to express herself and to be happy.”

Im so excited that her daughter is getting scary contact lenses I hope she terrifies all of the other sixth graders.

Simple everyday things you do that I don’t ever want to forget -

The faces you make when you sing. Your stubborn demands to ALWAYS wear a dress. The fact that no dress is ever big enough or long enough. How you always want “hair down” like mommy. The way you make my coffee in the morning. How you make me “hot coco” in the bath tub with soap and water. When you ask me to sing Disney songs while we drive -  and hearing you describe the song you want me to sing. The way you remind me to take my vitamins every morning. The way we pretend to be asleep when we hear mom get home from work. When I let you play with makeup and you kiss me every time you put on lip gloss. The way you say “cheese” when you take pictures of me with your Barbie camera. The numerous outfit changes to various princess costumes throughout the day. The patches of sweat and drool you leave on my shirt when you nap on my chest. Your attempt to ask for “moo mac” everyday for lunch. When you ask me to read to you. When you tell me I am funny. When you call yourself funny. When you look in the mirror and say “I’m pretty.” When you count things and look at me for confirmation. The things you ask for me to draw. The way you trace my tattoos and call every female tattoo “mommy.” The way you say “freckle” when you find one. When you use the potty and waste 3 feet of toilet paper just to throw it in the toilet. How you say “scuse me” when you burp. Wrapping you up like a taquito when we get out of the bath and burying you in blankets on the couch so you don’t get cold. How you pull me off the couch to dance with you when a song hits you just right. Everything. Everyday.

This is a poem that I am trying to write but do not know how to. This is a poem that I keep pushing down with swigs of shower water and over-exaggerated inhales. This is a poem that I am too afraid to write. This is a poem that I am flirting with on a Tuesday night, at ten p.m., when my mom is going to bed. This is a poem that is lightly brushing my hand and telling me how good I look. This is a poem I might take off my shirt for and wink at, if it asks politely. This is a poem that did not call me back. This is a poem that texted me three months later to tell me it was just thinking about me. This is a poem that only thinks of me when it is lonely. This is a poem that does not remember the color of my eyes. This is a poem that told me it loved me before meeting me. This is a poem that kissed me and then spit out the rust taste on my tongue. This is a poem that is scraping my name from its shoulders, pretending it did not touch me. This is a poem that has classified me as “emotional burden.” This is a poem that gets uncomfortable when I tell it I do not feel good. This is a poem that does not know what to say when I am sad. This is a poem that says it is my friend. This is a poem that says it cares about me. This is a poem that does not show up when it says it will. This is a poem that makes blank promises. This is a poem that knows it hurts me. This is a poem that is not going to do anything about it. This is a poem that is just young. This is a poem that is just learning. This is a poem that I am still trying to write.
—  This Is A Poem, Lora Mathis 

anyway poetry scares me until i let it take me into bed and kiss my ear. can you tell i just spill out my drafts and post poems unedited? 
The Signs As Things My Libra Friend Has Said/Done

Aries: ‘’how about we just drop out in year 10 and move to America?’’  and ends up saving £600 in the bank in about a month

Taurus:  fell off his chair and winked at the teacher while doing so

Gemini: does 0 tests/exams and just writes ‘’pls let me leave, i’m a good human’’ in every single answer

Cancer: ‘’relationships are for texting, not for speaking in real pftt’’

Leo: ‘’i think i’m a lesbian, like..i know i’m a guy..but once my mom told me i look like a lesbian and i’m starting to believe it’’

Virgo: ‘’i’m actually really smart once you get past my 100 layers of dumbness’’ *starts laughing at the word dumbness*

Libra: i mean every single one of these

Scorpio: *asks every teacher how they feel about pete wentz*

Sagittarius: ‘’I’ve only cried twice in my life, because of marley and me and pete wentz. both very important issues’’

Capricorn: ‘’i’m tempted to date our 35 year old male science teacher so i can at least pass one of my gcse’s’’

Aquarius: screams in the middle of class ‘’I’M NOT STONED IT’S JUST MY FACE’’

Pisces: *throws up reading the milk fic*

C: From a very young age my mother made me aware of the fact that my being light-skinned (and especially being mixed) would afford me a life better than hers. She told me that I would be liked more, that people would inherently find me pretty. And knowing my mom, I believed her. And as the years went on I saw it. I saw how stylists would have a fit over my curls and go crazy over all the things they wanted to do, then look at my mom’s kinky curls and ask her when the last time she used a relaxer was, cause’ she ‘clearly needed a new one’. I saw how when I was alone I just felt like a person around people, only occasionally being stereotyped, but with my mom I saw people treating her as if she were a glass of kool-aid adorned with fried chicken earrings and a fro to top it off; they only saw a stereotype in her dark brown skin. I realized the difference in how people treated me once they met her. Saw my friends go from being normal to suddenly asking me if I knew how to braid hair, and if my curls were real or if they were ‘weaved’, and if I liked this rapper such-and-such, and it confused me, because they knew I didn’t listen to rap. But she had taught me already and the confusion was only brief until I understood that brown to them was something foreign. And then I’d point out their stereotyping and they’d immediately get defensive. “I’m not racist, I have black earrings!” And whatnot. I saw how in stores when I would buy things with my debit card, I’d be sent off with a smile, and also saw in the same store that my mother would be asked for her I.D. And when asked they’d simply say it’s a 'policy change’. I clearly saw the difference and to see other light-skinned people ignoring these obvious differences in treatment and perception pisses me off. Some of you have dark-skinned parents like me and you’ve seen it yourself. You know exactly what the differences are but you’re caught so far up your own that you don’t even want to admit it. Keep telling yourself that you’re just 'trying not to let the whites divide us’ while you bask in their compliments, furthering you from 'other blacks’. Keep batting your eyelashes as they tell you you’re 'pretty for a black girl’ and keep lying to yourself and thinking that the solution is to pretend we all have it the same. So you benefit from your light-skinned privilege AND don’t have to hear about the struggles of dark-skinned people. Almost like white people wanting to ignore racism…so they can enjoy their privileges without hearing about the struggles of POC. I always hear light-skinned people getting angry because they feel they’re being compared to white people but guess what? If we refuse to acknowledge our privileges while still benefitting from them… That’s all.

(so it’s more than 10 pics so i had to upload it as text but w/e_

so if you didn’t read the first slide, my mom begged me to do this. i told her and my dad that his version of this (found here) got 500+ notes (i accidentally wrote 300 on the slide but yeah) and they both thought it meant that he was internet famous so she made me do this and i quite enjoyed it except afterwards, she was asking me about how i feel about calum and how him being away makes me sad and i was like wut but yeah

 got the idea from 5sosmichael again ;)

You did, Dad. You and mom had sex, you made me. It’s the sperm that has the genes and then goes into the egg and all, do you know how children are made, Dad? You “turned” me gay the same way you turned me into a boy. It’s not magic, you’re what made me gay, Dad. That’s on you; not me.
—  What Alec’s answer should have been when his dad asked him what “turned” him gay (a really gay spider also would have been an acceptable answer)