“can we talk”

These are the BEST POSSIBLE WORDS Bitty could say right now.

Everything starts from here. Everything.

These boys have had a bit of a honeymoon so far. The excitement of their new love has kept them going. But reality always sets in, and with reality comes the realization that those Magical Moments aren’t enough to propel a real relationship forward. The heart and soul of a healthy relationship is communication, and while these guys haven’t been keeping Big Dark Secrets from each other, they HAVE been letting some things go unsaid.

In particular - and we saw this as early as 3.3 - Bitty’s been swallowing a lot of his needs for Jack’s sake. One of the touchstones of Bitty’s career at Samwell has been his enjoyment of being totally and unapologetically himself. He has been able to embrace every aspect of his identity - the pie baker, the hockey player, the gay boy - and find acceptance with his friends. But along with finding love, he’s also had to compromise that for the first time. Which he was willing to do, at first. But it was never going to be something he could tolerate in the long term. Too much of this story is wrapped up in Bitty’s sense of self.

So Bitty needs to start communicating his needs to Jack. He needs to say to him, “Honey, I know we’re keeping things quiet for your sake, but I need something else. I need an outlet.” It’s good for everyone for him to communicate those needs. It means Jack knows Bitty better. It means Bitty knows himself better. It means they can take care of each other and themselves better.

But, you know, one of the scary things about communicating your own needs is that the other person can say “I can’t continue in a relationship with you if you want that.” So yeah, Bitty has to put everything on the line, including his relationship with Jack. But if this were a relationship where Bitty had to continue to suppress his own needs, then it wouldn’t be sustainable as a relationship. All relationships need to move and change and grow.

So how does Bitty effect that move? Does he get angry at Jack? Does he issue an ultimatum? Does he tell Jack “I can’t do this anymore”? No. He says the thing that needs to be said. He initiates a conversation.

He says, “Can we talk?”

And as long as the answer is yes – as long as they *can* talk – this relationship has as much of a shot as any relationship has ever had.

anonymous asked:

fics whre kyungsoo overworks himself and faints and kai catches him? (im sorry if this I strange but i love imaging jongins arm around kyungsoo tiny waste

Admin Y:

  • Zodiac - kyungsoo faints /once/ and it’s not bc he’s overworked, and it’s only implied that jongin catches him (happens in this chapter) imo it barely fits but i can’t think of anything else

Admin J:

  • These Walls Caught Me Here With Something - okay okay this has a scene where kyungsoo falls on his knees bc he’s dying and jongin catches him before he hits the ground, the scene got me fcking fkcign fkicng FCKIH Emo
So it’s 1:11am...

Strap in–it’s a LONG one, and it’s about My Chemical Romance.

I’m listening to the 10th Anniversary Press of The Black Parade and I’m thinking back to who I was the first time I laid down on my tummy, head 6 inches from my radio/CD player combo, and heard the sounds of life support and a heart monitor that led me into the album.

I stayed there for the entire 51:53 (or maybe I stopped before the hidden track; I can’t remember), and my life changed as the measures passed by. 

Without this album, I wouldn’t have Brooke or any of my other MCRmy friends (Catherine, Theresa, Tiffany, etc etc etc), and I wouldn’t have started an online organization of people who looked depression, anxiety, self harm, suicidal ideation, and a multitude of other issues in the eye and said, “I care, and I’m here to help." 

I might not have decided I wanted to be a therapist without those people, without that organization, without this album. 

I wouldn’t have role models who inspired me to be artistic at a young age, to be unapologetically myself, who told my adolescent, insecure, media-pressured female self that I am beautiful because all women are beautiful, and that I had every right to spit and shout a hearty "fuck you” at anyone who tried to take advantage of me.

I wouldn’t have male role models who knew how to respect women, and if I’m being very honest on the Internet, I wouldn’t have had father figures between the ages of 11-14. It’s sad and a little bit dramatic, but it’s true. 

I wouldn’t have believed that it’s okay be fucked up–to be angry, to be sad for no reason, to want to burn the world down if it meant your problems went away–if these men hadn’t told me so in the span of 51 minutes and 53 seconds. At 11 years old, I needed that very very much. 

And, I wouldn’t have “Famous Last Words.” I find it difficult to describe what this song means to me, but for the last 10 years it has been instrumental in processing every minor and major tragedy I’ve experienced, including but not limited to the death of my brother, my dad (a whole slew of problems/incidences/psychological damages), missing opportunities, failures, poorness, realizing my own mortality and the mortality of those I love. When I listen to it on the good days, I can feel a tingle across my shoulder blades where the chorus of that song is going to be inked forever.

Without this album, this band, I have absolutely no idea who I would be. I happen to like who I am.

Honestly... (On mpreg)

I am not a huge fan of mpreg? I think it is because of that … notion of familiarity. That it’s not how the body is supposed to work!

It’s the ‘uncanny valley’, where cgi is just a step too close and as humans we know that it’s just not real. Not only do we know it’s not real, but we get seriously weirded out because it is just off.

This is why a lot of scaryyyy creatures in movies and comics etc. have human traits minus or plus or rearranged. People with no faces, or that Pan’s Labyrinth’s Pale Man with his eyes on his hands. Gosh, a man is not supposed to physically be able to have a baby and as a human very familiar with the human body I am like ugh.

So why is Devon waddling around with a baby belly?

I know that this kind of thinking is wrong, no matter how hard wired.

Ultimately, it is a sexist idea. Why? I am sure that those who are against homosexuality look at a couple and think it 'unnatural’ just as I look at an mpreg sim and think it unnatural. And I would tell that bigot that they are wrong, and that the idea that natural is superior is an arbitrary concept. There are so many things in the world considered unnatural that are also the bestest things ever, so why can’t the very fantasy of mpreg be accepted?? What is the difference between imagining a man with wings, or imagining a man with child?? Both impossible, but I don’t go eugggh when I see a dude with bat wings on my dash.

Perhaps the reason is that we think mpreg somehow messes with their masculinity? Weakens them? Bat wings are cool but … A baby belly??? Ugh. Why do you think that, Merry, unless you buy in to that gender dichotomy. Buy into the fact that all female traits are somehow inferior. Can’t let something like child birth get too close to my hunky man with the rugged stubble!!!

Imagine that it was somehow, in a shift of the universe, an AU if you will, natural that men carry a child to term. We would be born from a man, we would be raised born from a man, we would have a society that would cater to the pregnant man. We obviously wouldn’t think it unnatural.

It is just random happenings in the universe that this is how our bodies work, this is how we reproduce. Until science tells me otherwise everything is just chaos.

So my believing that mpreg is weird is just the product of how we have been made through millions of years - and that is not a reason to judge anyone for anything. Reject that old, ancient part of your humanity that says a person can’t do something because they were born a certain way. Sims gives us freedom from biological happenstance so …… Why not? Get over it.

With Devon’s help.

Although … I have been told I overthink things.

fuuei said: haha no i think it’s good to discuss differing veiwpoints without that intent. i don’t think their age is any excuse, frankly. 15 is more than old enough to recognize something as basic as that. four hours later, a simple “we’ll accept punishment” nothing else, does not help at all. it’s also not helping that eren’s always been so gung-ho about the sc and its creed. about armin, just one “we’ll support you armin” anytime after the reveal wouldn’t have taken much time

Eh, I’d argue that the type of empathy required to appreciate the emotional struggles of the adults responsible for you when said struggles conflict with your own struggles takes a few more years to become an expected, reasonable thing.

The anime might help out on the supportive front.

When it, you know. Exists.

raelis1 said: to be fair to eren and mikasa, they didn’t exactly have much time to spend on comforting armin, considering that zeke and reiner were still out there somewhere. they didn’t leave him alone because they didn’t care about his emotional state; they did it because they needed to fulfill their objective as quickly as possible, and hange ordered them to. so i find it a bit baffling that they get blamed for not being empatheitc enough towards armin.

This part is also true, but between the two of you, I’m starting to form this rough idea in my head about a post on how badly the Shiganshina Trio handles consistent emotional support outside of extreme situations.

They’re like the, “You fight good,” .gif of friendships, sometimes. Not out of social ineptitude exactly, but out of a sense that everything’s cool if they make it out alive. Despite continued evidence that some TLC processing might be in order. Dramatic outbursts are right out in the open for them to respond to, so they do so, but in the quiet aftermath, I’m not sure they know what they’re doing.

I don’t know, that idea’s still forming, so I haven’t gone through and really examined it, but I am starting to like it a lot.

Keep reading

Yoo Kihyun cried today as well as everybody else but Kihyun’s tears just struck a nerve in me because he hasn’t cried like this since Monsta X was officially created during No.Mercy so excuse me if I’m becoming a lil emo because these tears mean SO SO MUCH and here’s why:

- Momma Yoo is the one who always comfort the kids and telling them not to cry at award shows
- He’s the one who usually starts the “don’t cry” chant whenever Minhyuk, Wonho, or Jooheon are about to tear up because he knows Monbebe will worry
- He didn’t cry when they didn’t get any rookie award they expected to win and totally deserved to win
- Not during Monsurprise where Wonho was legit bawling and everyone was probably at their lowest point
- Not at their comeback showcase where Jooheon literally broke down in fear of disappointing Monbebe after such a long absence, he even reminded Jooheon that grandmother Yongguk as well as their families are watching so they shouldn’t make them sad

And now he’s crying with that gorgeously exposed forehead (im sorry this means a lot to me) because he thinks he didn’t do enough to deserve everyone’s love and support.

And that goes for the entirety of Monsta X who always think they need to do more and get more recognition to repay us Monbebe even though to Monbebe their hardwork and existence alone is enough.

And this saddens me because they don’t need to do anything more but if it’s gonna raise their confidence and make them happy then you know what let’s give it to them. It’s about time our babies get the recognition they deserved–it’s overdued.

Stop sleeping on Monsta X.

Let’s get them their first win.