tiva love

2

COULDN’T LIVE WITHOUT YOU I GUESS || [listen]

“you jeopardized your entire career! and for what?”

“for you.”

What’s a soulmate?

“ Well.. it’s like a best friend but more. It’s the one person in the world who knows you better than anyone else. It’s someone who makes you a better person. Actually, they don’t make you a better person. You do that yourself! Because they inspire you. A soulmate is somebody you can carry with you forever. It’s the one person who.. who knew you and accepted you and believed in you before anyone else did. Or when no one else would. And no matter what happens you will always love them and nothing could ever change that. ”
— 

Dawsons Creek

10

Okay. This is not easy. Hardest 180 of my life.


UGH EVERYTHING HURTS.

The contrast between the beauty of the scene and the pain of it all just guts me.

First of all, I’m betting the Casablanca-esque visuals are no coincidence, and this whole sending-your-true-love-away-for-his-own-good thing has to be a nod to Rick and Ilsa. If anyone would appreciate the homage, it a truly ironic fashion, it would be Tony.

(I mean, the contrast between the first frame of them together on the tarmac, and the later one of Ziva watching Tony walk away? RIGHT IN THE FEELS.)

There’s so much going on– there’s a tension between them because they’re both trying to stick to the plan, but it’s obvious that part of them just wants to crash right back into each other. Tony’s a little more blatant about it (reminding her she can change her mind), but you can tell Ziva’s struggling too, because it was easy to say this was for the best when he was an ocean away and she hadn’t seen him in months, but it’s another when he’s standing in front of her pouring his heart out and everything comes rushing back at once.

Tony just floors me here, too, because again, in contrast to his earlier desperate last-ditch plea, he understands now that this is her choice, for better or for worse (HA!), and has fallen back into his default mode to defuse the situation. 

At the same time though, he’s not exactly letting her off the hook, in the sense that he admits this hurts. “Hardest 180 of my life” is, again, one of my favorite lines of the whole series (I keep repeating that in these two episodes), because it’s so him and so them. Because he may not say the word out loud like Ziva did, but that is definitely what he means. It pains him as much as it does her to walk away, but it’s what she says she wants, and even if they both know it’s a lie, he has to respect her wishes. Whatever has just happened here is profound and life-changing (in more ways than one HEYO), but for whatever reason, it’s not their time right now.

And the last shot of Ziva – Cote’s series-wrap – is just heartbreaking, again. Because she can’t help but grin at him as he waves her off from the plane, because he’s Tony, but as soon as he’s out of view, she breaks, because he’s Tony and now he’s gone and everything hurts. (I mean, if that isn’t Ziva, then I don’t know what is. Lighthearted one second, tragic the next.)

There’s so much to unpack about this episode and debate, but this scene? I love it. I mean, I hate it, because IT HURTS, but the scene itself is so tragically beautiful and so big and cinematic and on that level, I wholeheartedly appreciate it. Does it suck that this is the last we see of Ziva (and Tony)? Absolutely. Did Ziva deserve better in her exit? Absolutely. But the scene itself? I do love it, a lot. I wish it weren’t the end, but I wish a lot of things that don’t happen because we can’t have nice things, so I suppose I have to deal with it.

Anyway. It’s beautiful and terrible and everything in between.

(Also: does Ben Gurion Airport not have a terminal? With gates? And ramps? Cause I sure as hell haven’t boarded a transatlantic flight from the outdoor staircase, but maybe that’s just part of the old-school film charm…)

Also, again: THEY’RE SO PRETTY.

(I hate everything.)

This is the end, folks. 

(Or is it?)

Small reminder!

Ziva is still alive and probably walking around Paris, with Tony and Tali. While shopping for a nice dress.. And Tali has the exact same dress, because she wants to look as pretty as mommy does.. And Tony picks Tali up and tells her she looks like a princess, and that yes, her mother is the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen! And it would be Paris without Tiva making love.. And then 3 months later, Ziver tells Tony she’s pregnant! And Tony is so happy and Tali is super excited, because she’s going to be a big sister and help mommy bathe the baby! Yes, that’s what’s happening to the DiNozzo family!!! And no one can tell me otherwise!

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Please enjoy as we remember this amazing couple.

5

Okay, so I have several posts about THIS SCENE, but this part had to have its own set because LOOK. AT. THEM.

Ziva is attempting to be all-business, even though as soon as they get there it’s obvious she’s already been crying, or on the verge of it, from the tears on her face. (Which may be more Cote de Pablo’s real-life emotions at the time than Ziva’s but I’ll take it.) She’s somber and serious and determined to follow through, despite everything that happened. 

Because she’s doing this for him, and while Gibbs might not exactly be the ideal role model, he’s the closest thing to a father she’s had for years, and if there’s anyone whose approval she’d seek, it’s his. Rightly or wrongly, the little girl who dreamed of traveling the world and dancing and having a family still seeks out her father’s reassurance, and in the absence of the one of her birth, she relies on the one of her choosing. 

Anyway, I’m off track.

This is so them because even though both of their hearts are breaking (of their own doing) and they’re trying to pretend that nothing is wrong, Tony falls back to his usual defense mechanism (mockery) and Ziva can’t help but laugh, because at the end of the day, he is still him and she is still her and this is what they do. It’s just so tragic, because they should work, this should work, but it doesn’t and it won’t for all the wrong reasons.

So for such a dark episode, it’s a little bit of levity, and I’m glad that we got at least one brief instance of seeing that wit and repartee one last time, because this is what their relationship was. Yes, there was irritation and confrontation and hurt, but there was also playfulness and affection and laughter, and it’s important that they showed that in the midst of all the tragedy around them.

Or, maybe I just really like seeing them smile. 

Ugh, you can just see in both of them, but especially in Ziva, how much they love each other, and why this is all wrong wrong wrong.

Also: they’re so pretty.

Do not tell me that they weren't in love. Because did you see Berlin?

look at that cheeky flirting ;)

“One day, you will dance with a man who deserves your love” -Eli David

Look at the love and adoration in her eyes

“If it was not for Orli things would have been different. I would be a different person.”

“Then I should catch her before she leaves. You know, and thank her. “

LOOK AT HOW SHE LOOKS AT HIM. LOOK AT HOW HIS FIRST INSTINCT IS TO SHIELD HER. I REWATCHED THAT SCENE. THE DESPERATION IN HIS VOICE WHEN HE SHOUTS HER NAME. IN THE CHAOS OF THE CRASH, TONY STILL TRIED TO SHIELD ZIVA WITH HIS ARM AND COVERED HER.

and..LOOK AT THIS

BLOODIED AND WAVERING OUT OF CONSCIOUSNESS TONY TRIED TO GRAB ZIVA’S HAND

!!! i am not ok !!!