tis a scratch

'Tis but a scratch!

Our warrior had lost one of his legs after heroically challenging an enemy commander to a duel (to give us time to either dispose of the soldiers or to run). The GM decided that such courage ought to be rewarded and used the near death experience as a trigger for magic (awakening, as we called it in our universe). The warrior ended up being a necromancer. This has led to various funny situations, as the party tried to figure out how to best exploit this newfound talent.

Me: So, I guess we’re going to need a peg leg, huh?

Former warrior: *reading up on his new magic talents* Yeah…hey, it says here that I can sense and summon ghosts. Does that apply to objects as well?

GM: I suppose.

Rogue: *getting excited* So he could have like spectral weapons?

GM: *consults notes* Yes, though they would shatter easily.

Archer: What about -

Rogue: Wait. Is the ghost of his leg there?

GM: What?

Rest of party:  *stifling laughter*

Rogue: So is it?

GM: *hesitates* I guess…

Former warrior: *starts grinning*

Rogue: *grins back* Guys…

Rest of party: Yeah?

Rogue: Spectral limbs!

Party: *bursts into laughter*

GM: …Okay, for the sheer hilarity I’ll allow it.

Former warrior: Yes! *performs spell*

GM: *sighs* I can’t believe I am saying this…You summon the ghost of your leg.
Congratulations, you now have a spectral peg leg.

Beware the Ides of March

this isn’t the fic i intended to write today (or ever really) but it’s the fic that happened so

read on ao3

Bellamy doesn’t believe in any higher power, not really. He also doesn’t believe in fate, or coincidence, or any of those other things that people like to blame random happenings on.

But he will admit that if he did actually believe in any of those things, he would be fully convinced that they were laughing at his misfortune at this very minute which. Honestly, he would be too if not for the stab wound in his side. Stab wounds apparently make the whole laughing thing kind of difficult. Who’d’ve known.

“Would you just hold still?” Clarke huffs as she tries to clean the wound.

“No.”

“You’re incorrigible.”

“And your bedside manner sucks, princess.”

She pinches the soft skin on the inside of his bicep and he yelps, glaring at her balefully.

It’s not like he wants to be here, sitting on the uncomfortable examination table in the ER, shirt off, and paper crinkling noisily beneath him each time he so much as breathes. No one ever wants to be in the ER, leaking blood all over the place because they were fucking stabbed in a mugging gone wrong, not even if the opportunity lends itself to a bout of truly morbid humour.

Just this morning he was telling his sophomores about the Ides of March and now here he is, living his own version of it. Again, he would be laughing except- stab wound.

Clarke is bent over his side, wisps of blonde hair escaping her braid and looking platinum in the harsh fluorescent hospital lighting. Her eyebrows are furrowed as she goes over the cut with antiseptic, and he hisses once more.

“That hurts,” he grunts, and then flinches again when she goes back in with another piece of gauze. Most of the bleeding has stopped, but there’s still a lazy trickle that she has to keep wiping up intermittently.

“Stab wounds tend to do that,” she deadpans.

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Monty Python and the Holy Grail inspired rp starters (part 1/ 2)
Feel free to change pronouns !

  • “Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?”
  • “A five ounce bird could not carry a 1 pound coconut.”
  • “I’m not dead!”
  • “He says he’s not dead!”
  • “What I object to is that you automatically treat me like an inferior!”
  • “Who lives in that castle?”
  • “Be quiet! I order you to be quiet!”
  • “Well, I didn’t vote for you.”
  • “If I went around saying I was an empereror just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they’d put me away!”
  • “Did you see him repressing me?”
  • “None shall pass.”
  • “‘Tis but a scratch.”
  • “A scratch? Your arm’s off!”
  • “It’s just a flesh wound.”
  • “I’ll bite your legs off!”
  • “We have found a witch, might we burn her?”
  • “Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?”
  • “And that is how we know the Earth to be banana-shaped.”
  • “Explain again how sheeps’ bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes.”
  • “I’ll ask him, but I don’t think he’ll be very keen.”
  • “I’m French!  Why do think I have this outrageous accent?”
  • “You mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries.”
  • “Oh, stop bitching and let’s go have tea.”
  • “We’ll kill him first and then have tea and biscuits.”
  • “You would not be so ungallant as to refuse our hospitality.”
  • “Get on with it!”
  • “Those who hear them seldom live to tell the tale!”
  • “I’d rather just sing!”
  • “You’re not going to do a song while I’m here.”
  • “You stay in the room and make sure he doesn’t leave.”
  • ‘’'I’ll just stay here, then, shall I?“
  • ’'You’ve come to rescue me!”
Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Originally posted by nestorquik

Request: Hey! I just wanted to request a story about the reader having the worst day, like so much worse than even getting struck by lighting-worse. Maybe into an accident and break a few bones? Team rushing over jus tin time as the ambulence’s arrive to take the reader away and they ride with them to the hospital, well, one of them, while the rest of the team follows in their cars. Sorry if this isn’t somethin you’re willing to write, btw

Summary: Fem!Reader just has a really long day. Much angst.

A/N: HEY GUYS! I’m baaack! Didya miss me? No? You didn’t even notice I was gone? Same. Anyway, hiatus is over (until finals week probably lol) and now I’m back to writing! I was so excited to post today that I accidentally woke up at 3am oops. Anyways, hope you guys enjoy this one! I had crazy writer’s block when I tried writing this one, took me the whole weekend while camping + Monday to finally finish this one smh Enjoy!

Wordcount: 887, meh not too shabby for my first post-hiatus fic

Warning: mention of blood, car accident, angst

Requests are closed for now, very sorry friends :(

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These are the notes i took for my English class.

Romeo and Juliet notes

Act 2 scene 2: balcony scene

Lot of sonnet in this scene

Second level of the stage that juliet would walk out on

Romeo needs to chill ok hes like 16 and he wants love like??? Bro chill ok

They just met like why is he so in love some girl just dissed him

Diggity dang he’s desperate

“Wherefore art thou Romeo?”= Why do you have to be Romeo? (aka Why do you have to be a Montague)

Leaving your family was a dishonor like whoa

Romeo is a womanizer smh

Juliet is like 13 and romeo is 16 um she hasnt even had her first period yet romeo can you like maybe chill

Juliet is kind of embarrased like they’re moving too fast pls i dont want you under my dress mashy mashy no good dont take advantage of me pls be honest

Juliet: “fam dont leave” romeo: “I LOVEEEEEEE” juliet: “fam im back lets marry” romeo: “hot dang sweet nuggets yeeeeeeeeee”

Juliet: “parting is such sweet sorrow” romeo: “lmao ikr”

Juliet: “you hang up first’ romeo: “no, you hang up first!” juliet: “lmao k” romeo: “o”

Romeo is so du MB OH MY G od

They made themselves prisoners to one another

Juliet: “I feel like a tiny bird and u yank me back” romeo: “OMG SAME BABE” both: “OMG BABEEEEEEEEEEEEEE”

Romeo cries in the forest its not emo you’re emo shut up

How are characters good and bad

Friar: “maybe you’re going too fast” romeo: “…” friar:”…” romeo:”…” friar: “lmao ur right lets get u hitched my dude”

GROSS JOKES ARE BEST JOKES

Friar is like bipolar or smth????

Juliet: “im going to confession” fam: “lmao k” juliet: “sike lmaoooooooooooo”

Hottest day of the year ohohohohoohohohohojohohohohohodfmhooo

Tybalt is the love of my life omg

Mercutio: “thou art as hot…” benvolio: “???” merutio: “as the sun” benvolio: “*gasps* omg” mercutio: “ ;) “

mERC uti O x be NVO li O tex T i T o MG

Tybalt is full of angst he’s so emo

Tybalt is so tsundere im cryign

“Fiddlestick” mercutio what

Mer cuTIO DO nt thr EATE n the e MO

He wants 2 fight

Tybalt is the best swordsmen u go bby

Tybalt is afraid of getting executed omg bby

Mercutio, page 995- Act 3- Scene 1: “I am hurt.”

Romeo: “guys can we maybe chill” everyone else: “h Ow ab oUt mayBe u ch ILL”

Benvolio: “omg are you okay” mercutio: “tis but a scratch” benvolio: “dude ur bleeding out” mercutio: “ti S BU t a fle sH WO un D i M fi NE”