times like this i wish i could rap

my recap of 170323 The Wings Tour
  • Got sprayed by the holy water, blessedt by Yoongi and Hoseok themselves
  • Some girls lightstick bomb top went flying from behind me; thrusting her light stick too hard
  • A girl fainted in the pit RIGHT when they were going on stage
  • Taehyung likes blowing kisses and having us go insane
  • Got noticed by Jimin, Seokjin, Namjoon, and Jungkook plenty, I got a nod and smile from Yoongi.
  • Then I got Hoseok who was just being a fluffy hyper baby the whole time who had 17 cups of coffee
  • I don’t think he noticed me
  • Taehyung was pretty chill, he was exploring everywhere. I think he gave me a wave at some point.
  • The girl next to me was a Jimin stan and went nuts when she saw him do Lie, I’m not kidding, she was full on convulsing and wanting to jump the rail in front of us
  • I collapsed on my friend and the seat every time they played those bOPS
  • A girl was screaming JHOOOOOOOOPE every 2 seconds without rest. I aim to be that fucking girl. Bless you.
  • When everybody was not putting up banners at the according songs and it was confusing af since we had like 2 to 3 projects going on lmao so I didn’t get to use them that much
  • Seokjin got hit with a cap and just stared at it on the floor like “excuse you hoe I’m tryna talk tf?”
  • Someone was legit chucking plushies up there and Hoseok grabbed them all to hug them at once
  • there was so much shoving and pushing to get through processing oml it was scary seeing everyone rush
  • everyone was loud. just loud. it was perfect
  • someone gave Jungkook the American flag after he gestured to it for it to be given to him, and wore it as a cape after displaying it. this is going to be his thing. idc.
  • Jungkook = New Captain America
  • everyone kept throwing plushies at Hoseok and Taehyungs feet like guys they gotta wALK DON’T BUST THEY ANKLES
  • Namjoon smiling really big whenever we’d take over his lines
  • Yoongi doing the “let’s take out my inner ear piece and see all my bitches scream for me” for his introduction
  • fuccboi hoesucc come thru with baepsae and mama
  • jimin’s no hands when he was hip thrusting into the air like he tryna bust a nut on stage… boi
  • s l u t d r o p s
  • high notes into over drive by maknae/vocal line
  • everyone sang awake
  • Seokjin and Yoongi made me cry, and the chorus to Spring Day
  • had them back up violinists and shit for some songs, being fancy
  • I did a body heart to Namjoon and he had thAT DIMPLE FACE I FELT COMPLETE
  • Jimin teasing tf out of the girls in pit… way too close to the edge… back up bruh, they want to eat you alive, don’t do it
  • me: *watches Taehyung do Stigma*
  • me: “WAIT FOR IT”
  • also me: “hoe don’t do it”
  • me in the end: “omg”
  • he hit the note
  • I have announced my funeral
  • y'all are invited
  • when they were saying goodbye, Hoseok and two other members had us all waving our arms to the ending of Spring Day left to right for a straight minute, we mirrored them exactly the same way
  • I think my friend said Taehyung or Jimin cried
  • I’ll have to see about that later
  • many many hobi stans
  • the look on their faces when we did the rainbow ocean for them
  • seokjin’s sHOULDERS FUCK MY LIFE
  • wanna climb his ass like a tree
  • the way yoongi stomps and raps at the same time had me rolling, he’s an angry smol man tryna prove a point
  • …When someone tells you jimin is 10x more handsome in person, believe them. just do it.
  • I made a mistake of even looking at him
  • I’m swerving
  • they are very real. all seven of them. wow.
  • I was too close for my own good to them
  • I’m not okay
  • but seriously what the fuck
  • why can’t I go back in time to watch Yoongi say “fuck you and you” in a strangled growl on loop, live and in my face? :’)

I wish I could go to Newark Day 2. Please give them so much love. Stay safe. Don’t push. Don’t shove. Don’t throw too many things at them. Just be respectful. They want to have a good time and so do you!

BTS deserves plenty of love from you guys. Have fun!

ok so i see these all the time so I wanna do one now… so this is my break down of divide

Eraser: I forgot he could rap and I’m shook, “I wish that love was a currency and the whole was wealthy” ICONIC “welcome to the new show” aka buckle up friends 

Castle on the Hill: makes me forget that I do not actually like my small town but reminds me of how much I love my friends, “they raised me and I can’t wait to go home” I’m crying

Dive: I am so here for this!!!!! Honestly I’m speechless, i just love this and the line “Don’t call me baby unless you mean it” YES

Shape of you: I will never get tired of this song, what a bop. Anytime, anywhere, I will go hard to this. I sing it in the shower regularly ngl  

Perfect: The most beautiful. Makes me wanna get married right this second.

Galway Girl: WHAT A FUCKING TUNE I GO SO HARD 10/10 but also does he say he finishes doritos and another bottle of wine??

Happier: going from galway girl to this is emotional rollercoaster. So beautiful and mature

New Man: this lowkey gives me a boyband vibe but in a good way, I love all the dragging and pettiness like I wanna sit down and chat with him about the true story behind this because it seems spicy 

Hearts Don’t Get broke Around Here: makes me feel like I’m in love even though I’m not, also makes me feel like sitting in a field of flowers. So so so so so beautiful. 

What Do I Know: I don’t see enough love for this song. literal definition of good vibes only. “Just remember life is more than fitting in your jeans, its love, undestanding, and positivity” THIS IS SO IMPORTANT

How Would You Feel (Paean): I said this had a John Mayer vibe before I even knew he played the guitar solo bc its so John Mayer-y (which is a good thing, I’m a slut for John Mayer)

Supermarket Flowers: i def thought this was gonna be a love song just based off the title, oh boy was I wrong and oh boy did I tear up

Barcelona: back on the emotional rollercoaster, but this time its going up, this is so much fun! Makes me forget that I’ve never actually been to Barcelona 

Bibia Be Ye Ye: catch me jamming to this but also trying to remember the stuff I learned from high school spanish

Nancy Mulligan: another irish bop what???? i like how he says religion in this song. very theatrical,  like a story time break

Save Myself: another beaut. so so so so powerful. 

Conclusion: I’m either crying or jamming or both. 

[TRANS] BTS Official Fanclub A.R.M.Y 1st Term - Interview (P3)

(the interview is from 2014)
scan © love_as_hobby
do not repost/screenshot without credit.

Q: It hasn’t been that long since BTS debuted but you have released 3 albums already. Is there any moment when you feel like “Ah! I’m going crazy!” while preparing for the albums? 

V: For me it’s hard and it leaves regret with every album. When I finished recording and listened to it, I would regret “I should have done better, I should have put more emotions in”. But once the recording is finished it can’t be redone… This part always makes me regret, so it was hard for me. 

Jin: There has never been an easy album for me but during ‘O!RUL8,2?’, from a few weeks before recording until the album’s finished, my cold wouldn’t go away. Especially my voice wouldn’t turn out the way I want it to be, so it was hard for me both mentally and physically. 

Jimin: It’s ‘N.O’ for me too. I don’t know why it was that hard. 

J-hope: Yeah, Jimin had it hard that time. 

Jimin: My parts got a little longer than the previous album. (laughs) I think I was pressured by that. 

Rap Monster: Really? Everyone chooses ‘O!RUL8,2?’. For me ‘2 COOL 4 SKOOL’ was really hard. Because of one song… I talked about this in another interview, but we had to modify the same part of the lyrics more than 20 times. I think I sold my soul at that. Just thinking of it… (shakes head) They kept telling me to change it so one day I got so furious. I couldn’t shout out loud because I was at the studio, so I went to the park alone at dawn and plugged in my earphones and shouted loudly for about an hour? Afterwards the introduction was written and things went well. Wow really, that time I wrote the lyrics while hanging on the chin-up bar and shouting until I nearly cried. 

Suga: Well, writing the lyrics was hard that time. I looked through my mail box recently and I sent an email with the subject [No More Dream - lyrics modification - Suga 1] like this, and it advanced to 27. Looking back at it made me think “How did I do it.” 

Jimin: That time Hobi-hyung went there for a while too. (points up to the sky) 

All: (laugh) 

J-hope: (laughing) It was really hard in ‘No More Dream’ days. 

Rap Monster: Those days were scary. The psychological pressure and the anxiety of whether or not it would be okay coming out like this. 

V: Every time we do one choreography move, we had to match even the angles of the fingers. 

J-hope: We still focus on the performance now but back then when practicing the choreography, if someone didn’t match even just a little bit, we would sure be staying up all night that day.

Suga: The real hard thing at that time was that during trainee days, the members who had longer training period would lead the younger ones in everything, but then they said we were going to debut, none of us has ever debuted before. 

All: (laugh)

Rap Monster: We can talk about it now but it was very scary back then. 

Suga: It was really terrifying. (laughs) We scraped up all our worries and stayed up all night thinking about it, we even discussed what to do just among ourselves in whispers because we were afraid the younger kids would hear it. 

J-hope: We’re talking about it while laughing now but back then, just thinking of it brings in the fear. 

Suga: Now it became like “Let’s write even if just one more line of lyrics in the time we spend worrying!”. (laughs) The album that made me nearly scream “Argh!” is the most recent one. Even if I didn’t get hurt in the middle (of preparing the album), I wouldn’t think we would be this short of time. 

Jungkook: Me too. I have this regret like “If only I have some more time to prepare”. 

Suga: Right. Actually if I didn’t get hurt we wouldn’t be tight on time, but I was hospitalized so we lost 3 weeks. I finished the recording just right before mastering and we barely passed. I aged by 10 years. (laughs) 

Rap Monster: That’s right. As the time’s fixed, we had to follow the year-end award ceremonies schedule and went to the studio at dawn to work, we can’t throw away the quality factor with the excuse of not having enough time. 

J-hope: But I feel like it’ll slowly become harder as we release more and more albums, because of the lack of time. Actually rather than not having time, it’s because we’ll want just a little more, just a little more time to make better and cooler music. 

Rap Monster: We have to raise our standard. We have to gradually raise the quality. 

Suga: But if we say something that’s scary to say like “We didn’t have time” to the fans, it would disappoint them, so we should refrain from saying such things. 

Rap Monster: I think it’s the parts that we could have done better. Instead of letting them know that we have worked on it like this, I hope to tell them that “We have put in a lot of effort.” With each album there are more of those parts that we wished we had done better, but I think it shows that our view in terms of music is slowly broadening. 

Suga: I think what Rapmon said is true. Back then I thought I just need to rap well, but now I have learned to think of the details more. 

J-hope: You can say we’re really growing up. 

Q: How did you feel when you listened to the 3 released title songs for the first time? 

Suga: I listened to the song thousands of times while working on it so I thought I wouldn’t feel anything fun when the mastered song came out, but I got deeply touched like “I worked hard on it and it came out!”. 

J-hope: There was a time before when I wasn’t aware of it while practicing ‘No More Dream’, but one day it suddenly came to me “Ah! This is it! It’s good!”. 

Jimin: (laughs) 

J-hope: I got the same feeling with ‘Boy In Luv’ recently too. 

Suga: You have that feeling this time too? 

J-hope: Didn’t I say it? (points to Jimin)

Jimin: Out of nowhere! At the studio! (laughs) 

J-hope: I went to the studio and I suddenly had a feeling. Jimin was there at that time so I told him “Hey Jimin, hyung thought about it on the way here, I have a hunch about this!”. 

Jimin: Right. (laughs) 

Rap Monster: You can’t trust Hobi’s hunch. 

J-hope: I really had a feeling. (laughs) Trust me. 

Rap Monster: I’m the same as Suga-hyung. I didn’t feel anything while working on it but when it’s finished and I listened to it, I had this proud feeling “It finally came out!”. Especially when I listened to the mastered version of ‘N.O’ on speaker and the “good house, good car” part came, I thought “This is it!”. 

Jungkook: The “good house, good car” part was the best. 

V: It was really mindblowing. (dancing the choreography) 

Rap Monster: And I had a real feeling this time when listening to ‘Boy In Luv’. Not like “It’ll do really well!”, but I feel like this can become BTS’ second starting point. I think letting people know that “BTS is this kind of singers!” is the most important thing. Actually I want to show these kinds of things through this album too. 

Jin: When I first listened to ‘No More Dream’, I remembered being very excited “Ah, so this is our first song”. 

Jimin: I had a hard time recording for ‘No More Dream’. So, actually I don’t remember it very well. When I listened to the dance break part of ‘N.O’, I thought “Wow~ It would be fun performing this song!”. 

V: Right. I went “Wah~” listening to ‘N.O’’s dance break part.

P1 | P2 | P3 | P4 | P5 | P6 

What More Could I Want? (Ben Platt X Reader)

WC: 3115

Warnings: KINDA SMUTTY YOU WERE WARNED, overuse of the word sang

Summary: Ben and Y/N are performing Say No To This at MisCast. Things, naturally, get steamy, and some feelings are revealed

Tagged: @lildipstick @bellasabb

A/N: Combining three requests! Yay! I had two anons ask for kinda smutty Ben stuff, and one who requested the whole steamy MisCast performance! Hope y’all enjoy

“Cast meeting! Report to the blue room!” I read aloud, chuckling at the text from Will. I made my way to the blue room, noticing that I was the last person to arrive.

“And now we’re a complete set.” Will said, raising his eyebrows at me. I put my hands up and sat down on the couch next to Ben. “Anyway, I have decided to call a cast meeting for a very important reason.” Will said, standing at the front of the room.

“And what would that reason be?” Mike asked, only to be met with a violent shush from Will. “Let me finish, Faist. As you all know, MisCast is this weekend.” Will said and we all cheered.

“Hush. Anyway, I have consulted with a majority of the cast and we have decided on our number, and performers.” Will said and I looked at Ben with a  confusion that he shared. We hadn’t talked to anyone about this.

“We will be performing, drum roll please, Say No To This from Hamilton!” Will said and everyone clapped. “And onto the cast reveal. In the role of Aaron Burr… Mike Faist!” Will said and Mike stood up, taking a mock bow.

“In the role of James Reynolds… myself. Thank you, thank you.” Will said, bowing. I chuckled, clapping lightly to myself. “The bastard orphan Alexander Hamilton will be played by none other than Benjamin Platt.”

Ben looked a little confused but stood up none the less, bowing and smiling. “Which leaves the role of the infamously seductive Maria Reynolds, my wife and Benny’s mistress. Who could possibly play that?” Will said, stroking his chin in mock thought.

“Y/N Y/L/N, that’s who. Congrats wifey.” Will said, gesturing for me to stand up. I’d watched my fair share of Hamilton bootlegs, and I knew how Say No To This played out. There’d be some pretty steamy stuff going down, and I’d have to do it all with Ben.

“Thanks for letting me know beforehand.” I muttered, earning a laugh from the rest of the cast. “Just so you know, we’re getting a divorce after this.” I said, pointing at Will. He put a hand on his chest in mock hurt, an offended look on his face.

“That hurts, Y/N. Anyway, even though everyone knows the song, we should probably do a quick run through before the event.” Will said and I nodded, looking at Ben, his hair shining a golden colour in the sunlight.

“Awesome.” Ben said, a wide smile on his face. “Well, thanks for coming everyone. Meeting closed.” Will said, smirking briefly at me before leaving the blue room, most of the cast following suit.

“So, Miss Maria Reynolds. How does that feel?” Ben said to me when everyone had left. I chuckled nervously, scratching the back of my neck.

“A little overwhelming. How the hell am I gonna fill Jasmine Cephas-Jones’ shoes?” I said and Ben shrugged his shoulders, giving me a shy smile.

“I have the utmost faith in you. I’ve heard you sing Satisfied in your spare time, so I don’t doubt that you can sing this one.” Ben said, gently squeezing my shoulder.

“You’re too kind, sir.” I said, and Ben laughed, his cheeks flushing slightly. “See? You’re in character already.” Ben said, shaking his head slightly.

“Well, I should probably go get ready. I’ll see you later, Alex.” I said, and a half smile crossed his face. “See you later, Maria.”

I took in a deep breath and smoothed down the skirts of my crimson dress, walking up towards Ben. “Hey Ben.” I said, tapping him on the shoulder. He turned around and his jaw dropped, his eyes scanning my body.

“Woah.” Ben muttered, his cheeks flushing a colour a few shades lighter than my dress. “Oh, uh, hey Y/N.” Ben said, stuffing his hands in the pocket of his suit.

“Hi. You ready for our big performance?” I said, taking in a deep breath. Ben nodded, his eyes still trained on my body. “Ben?” I said and he snapped his head up, his cheeks flushed.

“Oh, uh, of course.” Ben said meekly and I smiled, putting a hand on his shoulder. He took in a shaky breath and mustered up a smile. “Then let’s go.” I said, looping my arm through his and walking towards our seats.

“I’m kinda freaking out because two of the current Hamilton cast members are here. What if we screw it up?” I muttered, sitting down on a plastic stool.

“Y/N, you are incredibly talented. We’ll do great.” Ben said, placing a hand tentatively on my knee. I took in a deep breath, internally screaming because Ben’s hand was on my knee.

“Let’s go.” I said when I noticed that Mike and Will had taken their seats. We all stood up, and Mike and Ben walked onstage. “Hey guys!” Mike said, waving to the audience.

“Well, today a few members of the Dear Evan Hansen family will be singing something from a musical you’ve probably heard of.” Ben said, nodding to the band. The cello began to play, and I took in a deep breath.

“There’s nothing like summer in the city. Someone in a rush meets someone looking pretty. There’s trouble in the air you can smell it, and Alexander’s by himself. I’ll let him tell it.” Mike sang, the music playing ominously.

“I hadn’t slept in a week, I was weak, I was awake. You’ve never seen a bastard orphan more in need of a break. Longing for Angelica, missing my wife. That’s when Miss Maria Reynolds walked into my life. She said.” Ben sang, his voice low.

I walked on stage, clutching the microphone for dear life. “I know you are a man of honour. I’m so sorry to bother you at home, but I don’t know where to go, and I came here all alone.” I sang, my voice surprisingly sultry.

I noticed Ben’s eyes widen slightly, but he kept singing, turning to face me. “She said.” He sang, leaning against the desk provided. I nearly missed my cue because the sight of Ben leaning against a desk was rather attractive.

“My husband’s doing me wrong. Beatin’ me, cheatin’ me, mistreatin’ me. Suddenly he’s up and gone. I don’t have the means to go on.” I sang, walking closer to Ben.

“So I offered her a loan, I offered to walk her home. She said.” As Ben sang this I walked right up next to him, and I turned to face him, clutching my dress as I did.

“You’re too kind, sir.” I sang, winking at him as I did. “I gave her thirty bucks that I had socked away. She lived a block away, she said.” Ben sang, moving his free hand about as he did.

“This one’s mine, sir.” I sang, looking away from Ben. “Then I said "well, I should head back home.” She turned red, she lead me to her bed, let her legs spread and said.“ Ben sang, and I whipped around to face him, my dress clutched in my hands.

"Stay?” I sang, trying to be as sexy as possible. “Hey.” Ben said awkwardly, looking me up and down, earning chuckles from the audience. “Hey.” I sang seductively, and I noticed Ben bite his lip.

“And that’s when I began to pray Lord, show me how to say no to this. I don’t know how to say no to this. But my god she looks so helpless. And her body’s saying hell yes.” Ben sang, growling slightly on those last two words.

“Woah.” I sang, circling Ben as I did. “Lord show me how to say no to this. I don’t know how to say no to this. In my mind I’m trying to go.” Ben sang, and my eyes were trained on him. “When her mouth is on mine I do not say no.”

As Ben sang this I walked away from him, and took a deep breath, knowing what was about to come. I turned around at the same time as Ben, our eyes locking. I walked quickly towards him, and took in a deep breath.

I gently grabbed the sides of Ben’s face and pulled him into a kiss. I closed my eyes and melted into the kiss, relishing in the feeling. Ben’s hands sat on my waist, and he pulled me close to him.

My stomach filled with butterflies, but before I knew it, the kiss was over. Ben broke away, and even though he was in character, it still hurt a little.

“I wish I could say that was the last time. I said that last time, it became a pastime. A month into this endeavour I received a letter from a mister James Reynolds, even better. It said.” Ben rapped slightly, Will swaggering onstage.

“Dear sir, I hope this letter finds you in good health. And in a prosperous enough position to put wealth in the pockets of people like me, down on their luck. You see, that was my wife you decided to.” Will sang cockily, looking over at Ben who was clutching a piece of paper.

“Fuuu….” Ben said, earning chuckles from the audience. “Uh oh. You made the wrong sucker a cuckold, so time to pay the piper for the pants you unbuckled. And hey, you can keep seeing my whore wife if the price is right. If not, I’m telling your wife.”

Will ended his part and waltzed off the stage, shooting me a wink as he did. “I hid the letter and I raced to her place. Screamed "how could you” in her face. She said.“ Ben raced over to me and I clutched his arms tightly. "No sir!” I belted, suddenly feeling like I was very much Maria Reynolds.

“Half-dressed, apologetic, a mess. She looked pathetic, she cried.” Ben sang and I sunk down onto my knees, my face dangerously close to his crotch. “Please don’t go, sir!” I sang, and Ben walked away from me, my hands slipping off his knees.

“So, was your whole story a set up?” Ben questioned, looking down at me. “I didn’t know about any letter!” I sang, my hands clasped together. “Stop crying. Goddamnit, get up!” Ben sang, and I clutched my dress.

“I didn’t know any better!” I cried, and Ben sighed, crouching down so he was looking me in the eye. “I am ruined.” Ben sang and I looked him right in the eye. “Please don’t leave me.” I pleaded, watching as Ben walked away.

“I am helpless.” We both sang, and Ben stood up and walked away from me. “How could I do this?” Ben sang softly, almost to himself. “Just give him what he wants and you can have me!” I belted, beginning to stand up.

“I don’t want you.” Ben sang and I felt those words cut deeper than they should have. “Whatever he wants. If you pay, you can stay!” I belted, the key change flowing smoothly.

“Lord, show me how to say no to this. I don’t know how to say no to this.” As Ben sang I raced up behind him, running my hands over his torso. His breath hitched slightly, but he continued singing.

“But the situation’s helpless.” I turned around so I was looking him right in the eye. “Helpless!” I sang, my breathing laboured slightly. “And her body’s saying hell yes.” Ben sang and I spun him around, holding onto his arm.

“Lord, show me how to say no to this.” Ben sang, and he placed one arm on my waist and one on my back. I cupped the side of his face, and took in a deep breath. “How can I say no to this?” Ben and I sang in unison, and I pushed him away.

We decided not to use a chair, so Ben wandered upstage, and I lingered towards the front. “There is nowhere I can go. When her body’s on mine I do not say no.” Ben sang, and I raced over to him, snaking my arms around his neck.

Ben took hold of my arms and took them off his neck. He grabbed my waist and flipped me so I was facing forward, and my back was pressed against his chest. “Yes.” Ben breathed out, his head resting in the crook of my neck.

“Yes.” I sung, leaning back so there was no space between Ben and I. Ben’s arms circled my waist and I rested my hands on top of his. I took one of his hands and moved it higher up my chest, bravely sitting it just above my cleavage.

We briefly forgot about the other lyrics, and I gasped a little when I felt something poking into my lower back. It took all of my willpower to pull myself out of Ben’s embrace, but I had to.

“Say no to this, I.” Ben sang, panting a little. “Don’t say no to this.” We both sang, and I slinked further and further behind Ben. “There is nowhere I can go.” Ben sang and Will stepped forward. “So?” Will said, looking over at Ben.

Ben sighed and walked over to him, handing him an envelope. “Nobody needs to know.” Ben sang, letting out a shaky breath. The music faded and the entire theatre erupted in applause. Mike and I made our way back to the front of the stage, and the four of us all took a bow.

“Thank you!” Will called as we walked off the stage, waving to the audience. “Y/N. Can I, uh, talk to you for a second? In private.” Ben whispered in my ear and his breath tickled and made the hairs on the back of my neck raise up.

I waved at a few people, but quickly followed Ben off to a slightly sheltered area. “I’m gonna cut right to the chase here.” Ben said and I nodded, taking in a deep breath.

“Please tell me it wasn’t just me that felt something onstage.” Ben said and I nodded slightly. “I mean, other than your, uh, you know.” I said, gesturing to Ben’s crotch with my head, and Ben frowned a little.

“You know what I mean, Y/N.” Ben growled, his tone of voice igniting a fire in my stomach. I simply smirked and pulled him into a heated kiss, nothing like our one onstage.

This one was frantic, in a way. Like we were trying to convey months of repressed feelings in one kiss. Ben held me close to him, his hands resting on my upper and lower back. My hands sat on his chest, fiddling with the lapels of his suit jacket.

I quickly pulled off Ben’s jacket, and it fell to the floor. Ben kicked it away and moved me so my back was pressed against a wall. I pulled away, desperate for a breath. My lips felt swollen, and I was fairly certain they were.

“You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do this.” Ben said, his voice low and gravelly. “Well, against the wall at MisCast isn’t how I imagined this going, but here we are.” I said and Ben’s eyes darkened, lust clouding them.

Ben attached his lips to my neck, and I felt my legs tremble a little. “Ben.” I gasped, clutching onto the fabric of his shirt. He grabbed the zip of my dress and expertly tugged it down.

I shivered a little as my bare skin hit the cold cement wall, but I let out a breathy moan as Ben found the most sensitive part of my neck. I leaned forward from the wall and I felt my dress fall down, pooling at my feet.

Ben stepped away, surveying his work before his eyes travelled to my incredibly exposed body. “Y/N.” Ben whispered, his wild eyes scanning me up and down.

“Now, it’s not very fair that you’re still wearing most of your clothes, is it?” I said and Ben almost immediately took off his tie, discarding it with his jacket. I captured Ben’s lips in a fiery kiss, and I hastily undid the buttons of his shirt.

Ben shrugged the shirt off, and I trailed my hands down his now bare chest. A moan escaped his mouth and the fire in my stomach blazed. I swiftly unbuckled his belt, noticing the rather significant tent in his dress pants.

I tugged his pants down, and Ben kicked off his shoes at the same time as his pants. Ben’s moved his hands up to the clasp of my bra, and fiddled with it for a second. He went to undo it when we heard a voice.

“Jesus Christ!” I looked up meekly to see a slightly traumatised Mike Faist. “Ben!” I whispered harshly, gesturing to Mike with my head. The look on Ben’s face could only be described as varying degrees of frustration.

Normally I would’ve laughed, but I was suffering from serious sexual frustration at the moment, so I wanted to punch Mike in the face and get back to screwing Ben.

“I knew you two had chemistry, but this is a lot more than I expected.” Mike said and I chuckled nervously, trying to ignore the fact that Ben looked like he wanted to murder Mike.

“Mike, can you, uh, give us a second, please?” I said, shooting him a look that screamed ‘leave us alone’. “Oh, ok. Sure thing.” Mike said, winking at us before walking away.

“Ben.” I said, and Ben cut me off almost immediately. “I really like you Y/N. How about you come back to my place after this? Maybe we can have a proper date before we run straight to third base.” Ben said and I nodded, pecking him on the lips before pulling my dress up.

Ben quickly got redressed, although his clothes were a little more crumpled now. “Hey, you mind zipping me up?” I said and Ben nodded. He zipped up my dress, his hands lingering on my back a little longer than normal.

“Thanks.” I said, and Ben smiled sheepishly at me. He leaned forward and our lips connected, butterflies filling my stomach. I cradled Ben’s face in my hands, and his hands sat gently on my waist.

We pulled apart, and I rested my forehead against Ben’s, panting slightly. “What do you bet the rest of the cast set this up so this would happen?” I said and Ben chuckled, his cheeks flushed.

“The odds are pretty high, but I don’t care right now. I’ve finally got the girl I’ve been pining after for months. What more could I want?”

ASTRO for Marie Claire (2017 February Issue)

Cha Eunwoo

Greatest interests recently: Japanese, the drama <Goblin>, driver’s license
Your favourite lyric amongst ASTRO’s songs: It’s a part from ‘Fireworks’. 'I want to secretly leave a little memory on your cheeks that have flushed red’. They’re pretty lyrics which tug at your heartstrings.
The drama of your life: <Rain Man>. My brother came to mind and I cried throughout as I watched the movie.
A special habit: I bite at my fingernails when I get restless
The member who possesses the charm you’d like to parallel: Moonbin. The charisma he shows off on stage is cool.
If you were to express your personality in one word: Simple yet complicated
Things you’ve got to be sure to bring along (with you) on the regular: Mobile, wallet, notebook, pen, glasses, contact lenses, cologne
Your childhood dream: Prosecutor, judge, doctor, etc.. It changed frequently.
What you would like to do today if tomorrow was the end of the world: After enjoying the last supper with my family, I want to find a spot in the remote countryside that will become my final resting place and then decorate it
Recent cause of worry: Having failed the driver’s test
Your hangout: The bathhouse at Seoulleung station
A dish you’re confident of making: Instant noodles
Phone wallpaper: ASTRO’s logo
A place you want to really have a holiday at: New Caledonia
Something I keep obsessing over unknowingly: View count on videos and digital ranking
A recent moment where you felt the most happy: When I stand on stage, when I see myself on TV, when the people around me cheer me on
Your life’s greatest escape: Having gone to watch a movie alone late at night not too long ago
What you personally think of as your charming point: Honesty and earnestness. I’m also nice (laughs).
An animal you think resembles you: A bear
An aspect (of yourself) you’d like to fix: I think too much and I get cold feet
Ideal type: A girl who’s wise and kind-hearted. Someone bright who makes me feel good when we’re together.
If you were to go on a date on Valentine’s Day: I want to spend some alone time with her as we have fun camping in the peaceful forest
Someone you want to see as of right now: My dad
No.1 on your bucket list: Receiving 20 licenses

Yoon Sanha

Your first plan for the new year: Building my body. It’ll probably take a long time (laughs).
Your favourite lyric amongst ASTRO’s songs: Lyrics from 'Star’. 'You’re in my millions of thoughts and even in my unclear future. You’re shining brightly in this moment too. Thank you for being my bright light.’
A song you’ve been obsessed with lately: Crush’s Beautiful
The person you’d like to meet in this lifetime: John Mayer. He plays the guitar really coolly.
The musician you must keep up to date with: Ed Sheeran
What you think you rank no.1 at amongst the members: Cuteness and beagle-ness, my skills in playing the guitar
The member who possesses the charm you’d like to parallel: JinJin hyung who’s really considerate
How you imagine ASTRO to be 10 years later: I dream that we become a team who performs worldwide
Things you’ve got to be sure to bring along (with you) on the regular: Oriental medicine which I’ve been consuming lately
A power you want to possess: The ability to stop time
A job you think you would’ve landed if you hadn’t debuted: A guitarist or a composer
When you last had a good laugh: I’m in fits of laughter all day when I’m with my members
Recent cause of worry: Maybe because I’m experiencing puberty but I’m getting a lot of pimples on my face
The menu you often order at a cafe: Strawberry smoothie, sweet potato latte
A dish you’re confident of making: Rice with soy sauce
A recent moment where you felt the most happy: When I welcomed the new year as a member of ASTRO
What you’d like to do on your soon approaching birthday: I want to go to a ski resort. I’ve never gone skiing before.
Presents you’d like to receive from your members: The latest computer model
Your charming point: Cuteness and shamelessness
A modifier you’d like to attach to ASTRO’s name: A team that makes you feel good by just looking at them
What you fear of: Ghosts. I think I’d pass out if I bump into one.
If you could have any three wishes granted: 10 billion dollars, an additional 50 wishes, fans’ health
What you’d like to buy at some point of time: My own snazzy guitar, an electric kickboard
Your reaction when you meet a girl who catches your fancy: I’ve never had that experience before but if one day I were to meet her, I don’t think I’d be able to take my eyes off of her


Your favourite track amongst the songs you’ve released: 'Star’ which was included in our 3rd album. I was happy being able to write the lyrics for the rap portion that will be incorporated into the song.
Greatest interests recently: The anthology I’m currently reading. I happened to read it by chance but I’ve become absorbed into it.
Thoughts you think of on stage: I want to connect with the audience and relish in the moment together
A song you’ve been obsessed with lately: Akdong Musician’s album <WINTER>
The drama of your life: <Step Up>. Watching the dancers inside the movie, I thought about how I wanted to live like that as well.
The person you’d like to meet in this lifetime: The 25 year old me who has become a famous world star
A peculiar habit: My skin’s on the dry side so before sleeping, I have to put on a facial mask, then apply cream and spray some mist for me to be able to go to sleep
What has changed after debut: I think I’ve gotten ore cautious
What you think you rank no.1 at amongst the members: Choreographing. I personally made the choreography for several released songs.
What I do when the standby time drags on: I’d monitor our stages or I’d search for and watch performance stages from foreign artists
How you imagine ASTRO to be 10 years later: I hope that at that point of time I’ll be with my members always enjoying ourselves no matter where we may be, just like now
A power you want to possess: Spiderman’s abilities
Your childhood dream: World star
A job you think you would’ve landed if you hadn’t debuted: A dance teacher or a musical actor
Your favourite food: Every dish my mum makes
Food that you hate: The cucumber that goes inside kimball
A place you want to really have a holiday at: If it’s a place with tons of gras then anywhere’s fine
A recent moment where you felt the most happy: Fansigns
Your charming point: Manliness
An animal you think resembles you: Baby dinosaur
An aspect (of yourself) you’d like to fix: My Gyeongsang-do dialect that sometimes pops out of nowhere
Your reaction when you meet a girl who catches your fancy: I’ll be just smiling on the inside
What you fear of: When I become lethargic
Someone you want to see as of right now: Family


Your first plan for the new year: Building my body
Your favourite lyric amongst ASTRO’s songs: 'I’m more excited when it’s the weather you like’ from 'Colored’ off our 3rd album
Thoughts you think of on stage: Let’s enjoy to the best we can
A song you’ve been obsessed with lately: Chainsmokers’ Closer
The musician you must keep up to date with: Justin Bieber
The person you’d like to meet in this lifetime: Usher
A peculiar habit: I hit the side of my neck when I get flustered
What you think you rank no.1 at amongst the members: Running and knowledge on history
If you were to express your personality in one word: Fire. I get keyed up easily.
Your childhood dream: A martial artist who uses swords
Something I keep obsessing over unknowingly: Maintaining my muscles
What you would like to do today if tomorrow was the end of the world: I’ll run straight to the house my family’s at and just as I usually would, I’ll loudly shout, “I’m home.”
The day you last cried: I was talking about how I felt at our mini live which was held not too long ago when I started to cry.
Your hangout: Practice room
Your own way of relieving stress: I exercise for an extended period of time
Your favourite food: Kimchi stew
A dish you’re confident of making: Pancake
A place you want to really have a holiday at: Santorini, Greece
What you fear of: Spiders, criticisms from people
If you could have any three wishes granted: To be good at singing, making all the people I meet like me, becoming courageous enough that I don’t get cold feet no matter what it is that I’m facing
What you’d like to buy at some point of time: An Iron Man suit
Ideal type: Someone who eats well and smiles easily
Your reaction when you meet a girl who catches your fancy: I’ll suddenly get quiet and I wouldn’t be able to make eye contact
If you were to go on a date on Valentine’s Day: We’d watch a movie then swing by a delicious bakery
No.1 on your bucket list: To live happily


Greatest interests recently: Fashion style. I want to earn a lot of money later on and buy fancy clothes to wear
Your favourite track amongst the songs you’ve released: 'Star’, 'Your Love…’
A song you’ve been obsessed with lately: Ariana Grande’s One Last Time
The musician you must keep up to date with: Sia
A movie you watched recently: <Master>. I’ve watched it about two times.
The person you’d like to meet in this lifetime: GD sunbae-nim
A peculiar habit: I pick my nose (laughs)
The member who possesses the charm you’d like to parallel: MJ hyung. It’s charming how he laughs.
What you do when the standby time drags on: I write rap lyrics
Things you’ve got to be sure to bring along (with you) on the regular: I make sure to have on me my cologne. My sense of smell is on the sensitive side.
Your childhood dream: A singer, a drummer
The day you last cried: On our rest day, I was lying down all alone since I was sick when I started to cry
Recent cause of worry: I want to be good at composing
Your own way of relieving stress: I listen to music loudly or I write lyrics
The menu you often order at a cafe: Iced americano
A dish you’re confident of making: Carbonara rice cakes
What you’d like to do on your birthday: I want to go on a trip with my members to the beach
Presents you’d like to receive from your members: A Porsche (laughs)
Your charming point: My eye smile
An aspect (of yourself) you’d like to fix: My short height. I want to grow a little taller.
If you could have any three wishes granted: My height to be at 181cm, all the clothes in the world, not quite sure about the last wish
Your life’s greatest escape: On the 1st of January in the year that I became an adult, I drank alcohol with my friends
Three things you’d take with you to a deserted island: A camping kit, a fire steel, shampoo in big volume
Ideal type: A girl who smiles easily
Your reaction when you meet a girl who catches your fancy: I’ll smile when we first make eye contact, keep my eye on her for a little more then I’ll approach her first and strike a conversation
Someone you want to see as of right now: My older brother
No.1 on your bucket list: I want to hold a concert this year


Your first plan for the new year: Go on a diet
Your favourite track amongst the songs you’ve released: A b-side track off our 3rd album, ’Colored’
A song you’ve been obsessed with lately: B2ST’s 'Ribbon’ and 'Butterfly’
The drama of your life: <Lord of the Rings>. Smeagol’s image was shocking so I can’t forget it.
A person you’d like to meet: Rain sunbae-nim
A peculiar habit: I shake my legs before I go to sleep
If you were to express your personality in one word: Happy virus
How you imagine ASTRO to be 10 years later: I want us to show off songs and performances that screams of our own color
Things you’ve got to be sure to bring along (with you) on the regular: My members (laughs)
Your method of stress relief: I sleep
Your childhood dream: An architect
A power you want to possess: Time travel
What you would like to do today if tomorrow was the end of the world: I’ll release a song that I personally composed and wrote lyrics for
A place you want to really have a holiday at: Hawaii. I want to see the clear sea
What you’d like to do on your birthday: Going camping with my members
The menu you often order at a cafe: Persimmon juice
Your favourite food: Raw fish and sushi
Your hangout: The Hangang Park
Phone wallpaper: A group photo of ASTRO
An animal you think resembles you: A duck
If you could have any three wishes granted: To go back to the past, to travel to the future, to be reborn as a genius musician
Three things you’d take with you to a deserted island: My smartphone, wifi, food provisions
Ideal type: A girl with a pretty smile
If you were to go on a date on Valentine’s Day: Scuba diving and confessing
Someone you want to see as of right now: My family
No.1 on your bucket list: To win no.1 on a music broadcast

Scans by: MyDeer_0330

Translations by @99pmh​
Take out with full credits

Weekly, our library open its doors to a group of teenagers. They’re coming from a Medical Educational Institute and they’re all either mentally ill or neurodivergents.

It’s pretty great, because the kids can choose everything they want, without being controlled (the only limitation being the fact that they can’t take much more than one book and one CD per week and per person), and they’re happy to be there.

Unfortunately, my planning doesn’t allow me to spend a lot of time with them, even though we get along very well (one girl actually asked me for dating advice, while i was recommending her a book. I didn’t dare to tell her that i actually had no practical experience in this matter.).

I noticed quite rapidly that the volunteer workers at my library have a really hard time to be “at ease” with them. The worst was probably yesterday, when a volunteer worker came to me, asking me frantically to deal with a teenager instead of her.

He had a speech impediment and, as far as i know, was probably neurodivergent. He wanted a rap CD, but didn’t know what to look for. I kid you not, this volunteer worker came to me and said to me, with a despicable tone :

“You have to help me. I can’t understand him at all, not a word, and he’s typing on the computer right now, i’m not even sure he can’t read.”

She looked… afraid. And more than patronizing, she seemed to look down on him like he was nothing. I didn’t have the time to say anything to her, but damn, i wish i had just threw at her every insult i could think of.

Instead, i just went to see this teenager, who was with his educator. I found him a few CDs, i hope he’ll like them.

But anyway, i heard his educator talking to one of my colleagues after that, saying that he was happy that i actually talked directly to the kid and not to him and that he’ll be sure to talk to me again if he’s in need of advice in the future.

And i’m just… sad. Sad to see that assuming competence about a disabled teenager is something that is worthy of “congratulations”. I just talked to them the way i like to be adressed. There’s nothing wonderful about it. It should be… normal.

BTS Reacts to You Sitting on Their Laps When They Have a Boner

Request: could you do the sitting on his lap while he has a boner for bts????


Jimin: Jimin’s always in the mood. It’s not alarming when you innocently sit on his lap and he makes it dirty. He starts getting stiff under you and you blush. “You should have known when you sat your pretty little ass on me this would happen.”

Originally posted by grungeylife

Jungkook: He’s still not used to any kind of sexual interactions. You’ve only ever had intercourse twice, both times he was very shy. His length grew stiff when you sat on him and he blushes red, “Oh wow, you feel so good against me, jagi.”

Originally posted by ofzico

Jin: “Don’t stop baby~” Jin coos in your ear. Your back is pressed to his chest tightly while his hard on grinds into your core. Not seeing him in a long time surely built up some sexual tension. You bite your lip and his hands come to rest at your chest, “Just like that.”

Originally posted by kths

J-Hope: Hoseok’s dancer hips can’t sit still when you sit on his lap. He’s grinding, thrusting, and gyrating them causing your heart to speed up. “Just fuck me already, Hoseok.“ 

 "Your wish is my command, princess.”

Originally posted by taekookie-bts

V: “Omo!” He exclaims as you sit on his lap. He had been having a wet daydream about you and you could hear his little pants.

“I know what you’re thinking about, Taehyung. And I know just how to make you feel good.” 

Originally posted by taetaehyungs

Rap Monster: “Mhm. Sit that ass on my lap.” It’s no surprise that’s Namjoon is an ass man, he loves to pinch, slap, grab, and massage your ass. When you sit on him it only helps his boner grow. 

Originally posted by go2bedjungkook

Suga: “Stop teasing me and get over here.” Walking around in nothing but his shirt really made him hard for you. When he commands you to come, you seductively walk over and sit on his lip. “Do you feel what you’ve done to me?” 

Originally posted by lethargicmin


BTS reaction to you telling him your a virgin right before you two have sex


“Really?! It is not a bad thing, I am just shocked. Don’t worry jagi…I’ll make sure your first time is comfortable and special..I love you!”

Originally posted by bts0726


“You say that like it’s a bad thing..I love you, so I will treat you well and I won’t pressure you or push you too far…Now let’s make love.”

Originally posted by yoonkooks


“Aw you are so precious! I am so honored to be your first, I will treat you like a princess, I love you so very much!”

Originally posted by bwipsul

Rap Monster: 

“I wish you could have told me sooner, I would have prepared better…but I guess it’s good that you told me now so that I am aware…I love you and I am going to treat you well…let me know if anything hurts.”

Originally posted by hongshiyoung


“Ah jagi, I will take care of you…I am not very knowledgeable either, so let’s take it slow ok? I love you so much!”

Originally posted by cmtae


Ok, we must keep open communication..Let me know if anything doesn’t feel right…I love you and I am so happy you trust me”

Originally posted by bwipsul


“I love you and I am so happy you chose me, but also so nervous…I will do my best to make it a good experience!”

Originally posted by donewithjeon

You Make Me Crazier

AN: Y/N is BTS’ interning doctor. Technically part of staff for a while. Jungkook doesn’t get to talk to many people his age, so can’t help but be curious about the pretty doctor he gets to see when he sprains his ankle and other ‘real injuries’. 

For in house injuries, BTS’ management had hired an interning first year med student to be on call in case any member required small scale injury support. A supervising doctor was nearby, so they could consult if they feared a complication would arise. 

For a 19 year old who had just finished her first term at med school, this was a real challenge. Not only was she interning without direct supervision, but she was going to be taking care of BTS. A band that her friends and her had practiced the dance moves to and sang along to on so many occasions.  

Her first few days were really about orientation, she was told not to hope meeting them unless one of them got injured, which would be an unfortunate meeting. She agreed with her supervising doctor, but inside she was curious about them.

It wasn’t like she should expect constant injuries, so her internship was mostly about understanding minor injuries and studying for her future exams, running test labs and conducting research. 

Soon enough, Y/N had gotten into a routine. Then, she met Jungkook who had sprained his ankle and was carried into see her by his fellow hyungs. She treated him and suggested staying under her observation for a few hours if that made him feel better. He did, and whilst Y/N tried to get to work Jungkook kept asking her questions.

‘What do 19 year olds do?’ He asked. 

Y/N looked up from her chart. 

‘Aren’t you 19? What do you do?’ Y/N asked. 

‘I’m an idol. Half my life is spent performing, the other half sleeping. If I’m lucky I can play games for a while. Sometimes, my hyungs and I will go out to eat after practice. That’s about it.’ He explained. 

Y/N could see he was curious. She felt bad for him. A typical 19 year old’s life wasn’t like his. But, some could say his life was better: it was a life that was doing something so early. It was a talented life. 

‘Well, every 19 year old has a different life. But I see your point. You’re Jungkook the golden maknae. Everyone has their eyes on you. A regular 19 year old isn’t like that. But, I don’t know if you’ll like the sound of it. The 19 year olds I know, including me wake up late, stay out late, drink too much, don’t study enough, kiss too much, spend time on social media too much and are trying to get their life together. You sound like you already have.’ Y/N said. For a moment she questioned if she should be a body doctor or a mind doctor. She felt like a psychologist now. 

‘I would draw. I’d spend all my time drawing if I wasn’t an idol.’ Jungkook said, a shy smile on his lips. 

Y/N hesitated before she asked ‘what would you rather be?’. She knew she stepped into possibly thorny territory. Could she live with any sort of information where Jungkook, golden maknae of BTS said he regrets what so many aspire for?

‘There’s no doubt I prefer doing what I do now. I’d rather having drawing as a hobby than singing. Music is my life, my first love. It’s unconditional’ I guess that doesn’t make much sense though does it?’  Jungkook said. He hadn’t really an idea why he was telling the pretty intern all these things. When he found out she was his age too, he wanted to know more about her. Observing her as she worked, he realised she was like him in some ways. She was quiet, polite and easy to talk to. Well, easy to talk to for him at least. She listened when all other girls screamed.

‘No, it makes perfect sense. It’s like what I do. Medicine makes me want to scream sometimes, but my love for what I may be able to do when I become a real doctor is unconditional.’ Y/N said, slightly getting lost in her own thoughts. This isn’t something she usually thought about. Y/N was a practical girl. She did things instead of thinking about them. 

Jungkook nodded in agreement, shying away. Y/N didn’t think too much of it. She was supposed to be practicing to be a doctor, she wasn’t here to see where talking to Jungkook could lead her. Later that night when she got home though, she couldn’t stop thinking about her first patient. His smile was shy and sweet. His laugh, (she rejoiced at how he had laughed at her doctor joke) was addicting. 

At the same time, across the city at the Bangtan residence, Jungkook was thinking about a pretty Y/N. It was scary for Jungkook, as well as exciting. Before, he had celebrity crushes. Well, they weren’t celebrities for him. The girls he liked who were idols he liked because they were cute, alongside a billion other fans. The pretty intern was someone he actually liked and felt open to talk to. 

He didn’t realise his hyungs were exchanging glances as they noticed at Jungkook’s wide smile. 

‘Did you dream you won a grammy award Jungkook?’ Namjoon asked, trying to figure out why this boy who used his free time to play games was sitting there smiling into thin air like the best thing ever had happened to him.

‘Aish I wish.’ Jungkook said, snapping out. 

‘Was it that intern?!’ J-Hope yelled, smacking Suga’s chest with the back of his hand as he thought he was on to something.

‘Ah, maknae did you do something?!’ Jin questioned, like a mother worried her son had done something inappropriate. 

‘Who do you guys think I am, Rap Monster?!’ Jungkook replied, annoyed his hyungs could think of it like that. 

‘Ya, I’m not perverted enough to do stuff like that so quickly.’ Namjoon tried to defend himself. He knew it wasn’t working. He probably would move onto a girl that quickly, if she was right.

‘So? It has something to do with the pretty intern doesn’t it?’ Suga asked, more as a matter of fact.

‘I don’t even know her name.’ 

‘Is this your issue? Just find out, ask her.’ Taehyung said.

‘She’s technically staff, you know the rules Jungkook’. Namjoon went into leader mode. He hated the rules himself, but he couldn’t do anything about it. The rules didn’t ban relationships with staff, but they did ban fraternising with staff for not BTS’ sake- but for the staff. 

J-Hope felt sorry for the golden maknae. He was a kid, who finally liked a girl enough to get to know her. At 19, he should be able to have some of the experiences the rest of them had. 

‘Find your way.’ J-Hope said. 

‘What?’ Jungkook asked. 

‘To see her. We’ll keep shut, right guys?’ The rest of the team nodded in agreement. 

‘Aish, my other ankle hurts!’ Jungkook yelled. 

Another way had been found, visits to the pretty intern’s office were going to become a regular thing for Jungkook. He smiled in delight. 

The next morning, and the morning after that, and the evening after that followed by a couple of other visits- Y/N was convinced Jungkook wasn’t coming to see her for ankle pains, headaches or whatever else he had managed to come up with. Their relationship had started to develop, they were friends who ended up laughing together at goofy jokes, eating lunch sometimes if Jungkook planned his visits well and recently, there had been what Y/N didn’t want to think of- but knew, was flirting. No one had any clue how much the golden maknae could do when it came to making her speechless. 

If anything, it was clear was coming to see her for a reason. 

She was going to confront him. 

Before he could enter the room once more again, Y/N stood there trying to come up with a stern expression. She was failing. One smile from Jungkook and it was like she was either breathless or hypnotised. 

‘Let me guess, headache today?’ She asked, trying to remain professional but it seemed to disappear around her only patient. 

Jungkook looked dumbstruck. Y/N was on to him. 

‘Aish, my back hurts.’ 

Y/N slipped. She grinned at him.

‘Back? I don;t know if I should be the one dealing with that. It can be pretty serious. Maybe I should transfer you-’.

‘i mean back head! The back of my head hurts. Here.’ Jungkook patted his head.

‘If you want to take me out on a date Jungkook, all you have to do is ask.’ Y/N said, putting a stray lock of hair behind her ears. 

Inside Jungkook was freaking out. He could do this. He could do this. Hell, he wanted to be as confident as the beautiful girl in front of him. 

‘Do you like pizza?’ Jungkook cockily asked, leaning against the door with his arms crossed. 

This was why he was the golden maknae, he took challenges with stride. Outside Jungkook looked confident, leaning against the door, arms crossed and cocky grin plastered on his face. Inside he was nervous. This would be the first time he offered to take a girl out. Girls usually just threw himself, and normally he sat on a date or two with nothing to talk about apart from the girl talking about how amazing he was.

‘What time?’ Y/N asked. She thought two could play at this game. 

‘Today. After I finish. You don’t go home till 12 right?’ Jungkook asked. He had given away another detail accidentally, which was that he sometimes stayed later at the studio to make sure someone was there to pick up Y/N. 

‘Don’t ask how I know that.’ Jungkook said shyly, looking down at his shoes. 

‘I’ll go out with you, if you tell me how you know what time I go home and anything else I don’t know tonight.’ Y/N said, offering her condition.

Jungkook breathed a fake annoyed sigh. Y/N was reminded of the time a youtube video went viral when he announced out he hated being called ‘oppa’. 

‘Deal.’ Jungkook smiled. 

‘I’ll see you tonight, Jeon Jungkook.’ Y/N winked. 

Jungkook felt elated. He’d have to see Y/N about his combusting heart soon enough. 

 That night, sat side by side over pizza and cola in the dance practice room (Y/N teased Jungkook how he’d end up diabetic from how much he drank), Jungkook learnt more about a girl who he was starting to really, really like. For once, he felt free. He felt like a 19 year old. He liked seeing Y/N in jeans and a t-shirt, hair down and being the cutest girl he’d ever laid eyes on. They were both mature for their ages, but it felt good for Jungkook to be carefree for once. He found out another detail about Y/N too: she was caring. She asked about his injuries, not as a doctor, but as someone who really cared. The night ended with Jungkook tired, and laying his head down on Y/N’s lap to rest. She smoothed out the contours of his face and eyebrows, and ran her fingers through his hair. 

‘I could fall asleep on you.’ Jungkook said, willing himself to keep his eyes open.

Y/N simply smiled what Jungkook was about to label her cute signature smile. It was shy for now. Jungkook could picture it becoming more seductive. 

WIth a certain stir at the thought, he willed himself to get up. 

‘I should take you home.’ Jungkook said. 

‘We’ll see each other tomorrow, right?’ Jungkook asked. 

‘If you find too many injuries Jungkook, I’m obliged to let someone know.’ Y/N said, allowing Jungkook to realise that she knew he was faking most of his falls.

‘Hmm. That’s a problem.’ Jungkook said, annoyed at all these rules. 

He took a step closer to Y/N. 

‘We have to find other ways to meet. Someone has to deal with my injuries though, right?’ Jungkook smiled as he whispered in her ear. 

Y/N felt her body tense. 

‘Same, place, same time?’ Jungkook asked. 

‘I’ll bring something for us. You can’t survive on junkfood.’ Y/N said, planning to cook something for Jungkook to eat. He had told her about missing home cooked food, and if anything- Y/N was known for her cooking. It was basically a science.

‘Aish, don’t spoil me women.’ Jungkook said, but he secretly liked it. He was falling for this caring, smart, pretty intern. More fast and scarily than he thought.

He walked her to a cab station before leaving himself, a spring in his step: a feeling of promise in his head and heart, something he hadn’t felt since BTS made their debut. 

AN: Jungkook is one of the most difficult people to write about! I think it’s because no one really knows what his personality is. He’s changed since debut, because puberty does that to you. I don’t want to make him seem like this innocent, always worried type because current Jungkook doesn’t seem to reflect that. I think he’s much more confident than we think, competitive, possessive and optimistic is probably who Jungkook is now. He’s so young, so his adult personality is only just coming into being.  

Long ass questionnaire

Low-key wasn’t gonna do but then i did it

oh and @jiminiefloof tagged me, so let’s get this shit done


1.Drink: ice tea (cuz it’s life)
2.Phone Call: my little sister
3.Text message: “kk thx!!” to my classmate and smol cute friend Alexi
4.Song you listened to: “Full House” by Mobb
5.Time you cried: this afternoon cuz i was watching this animation for the story of the game Deemo (AKA THE BEST GODDAMN RHYTHM GAME EVER FIGHT ME IF U DISAGREE) and it was kinda sad lol aND DONT WATCH IT IF U PLAN ON PLAYING THE GAME
6.Dated someone twice: never done it
7.Been cheated on: never happened
8.Kissed someone and regretted it: being attacked with a kiss from @jiminiefloof at school and low-key started to feel like i wanted to hide in my bookbag cuz im straight and im pretty sure that 75% of the school thinks im bi now
9.Lost someone special: my aunt on september 6 of last year
10.Been depressed: yep
11.Gotten drunk and thrown up: lol im not even of age


  • black
  • more black
  • white


15. Made new friends: yep
16. Fallen out of love: yep
17. Laughed until you cried: i do tht like every other day lol
18. Found out someone was talking about you: thankfully no
20. Found out who your true friends are: yep
21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: yes… unfortunately -_- (*cough cough*@jiminiefloof*cough*)

22. How many Facebook friends do you know in real life: almost all of them since most of them r either classmates in school or friends outside of school
23. Do you have any pets: nope :(
24. Do you want to change your name: not really
25. What did you do for your last birthday: try out my new drawing pad tablet thingy :D
26. What time did you wake up: 9 am today
27. What were you doing at midnight last night: watching BTS vids and reading BTS fanfics
28. Name something you can’t wait for: GOING TO KOREA IN THE SUMMER (its for religious purposes tho)
29. When was the last time you saw your mother: like maybe an hour or two ago
30. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: wish i disciplined myself to wake up on time, to eat healthier, and to exercise, but i can probably still do tht
31. What are you listening to right now: “Joke” by Rap Monster
33. Something that is getting on your nerves: school in general
34. Most visited website: tumblr and youtube lol
35. Elementary: used to go to elementary school in new york, graduated like 6 or 7 years ago i think
36. High school: one more year bless
37. College: might go into graphic design with illustration on the side, not totally sure yet
38.Hair color: black, or dark brown idek
39. Long or short hair: mini afro :3
40. Do you have a crush on someone: i gave up on having crushes, well i do have a crush on Jung Hoseok :)
41. What do you like about yourself: im pretty tol, nice smile, dimples, weird ass laugh, multi-talented, considers myself pretty friendly and generous, confidence in body, can find the nice things in almost anybody, am not ashamed to embarrass myself and be my weird, loud self in public
42. Piercings: the basic ear piercings, might get more ear piercings when im older
43. Blood type: AB+
44. Nickname: Manda, Mandi, Manda Panda
45. Relationship status: married to my husbands from korea
46. Zodiac sign: Pisces
47. Pronouns: She/ her
48. Favorite tv show: i dont even watch tv anymore so imma just name anime (ONE PIECE, even tho i havent finished it yet lol)
49. Tattoos: nope
50. Right or left hand: imma righty


51. Surgery: my left ovary twisted so i had to get surgery to put it back to normal like 2 years ago
52. Piercing: when I was a lil baby
53. Sport: i never played in a team but the first sport i ever learned to play was either tennis or volleyball, cant really remember
54. Vacation: i dont know if i would really count it as a vacation but Brazil55. Pair of trainers: tf r trainers???


56.Eating: nothing
57. Drinking: nothing
58. I’m about to: probably read or something
60. Want: to skip school tmm, and maybe the whole week
61. Get married: omg yes marriage is so magical
62. Career: probably graphic designer or something


63. Hugs or kisses: for friends hugs, for future hubbie both
64. Lips or eyes: eyes
65. Shorter or taller: dont really care
66. Older or younger: dont really care about tht either
67. Nice arms or stomach: tf kind of question is this XD                            

68. Sensitive or loud: well im usually loud so loud i guess                              

69. Hook up or relationship: relationship

70. Trouble maker or Hesitant: hesitant


71. Kissed a stranger: nope
72. Drank hard liquor: like i said before, no old enough for tht shit
73. Lost glasses/ contact lenses: yep, lost glasses once, but then i found them a couple of months later
74. Turned someone down: yep
75. Sex on first date: proud virgin
76. Broken someone’s heart: yeah… and felt bad doing it
77. Had your heart broken: HAHA YEP
78. Been arrested: Nope, too much of a goody two shoes
79. Cried when someone died: yep
80. Fallen for a friend: bitch u guessed it


81. Yourself: yeah i guess
82. Miracles: yes :3
83. Love at first sight: yes
84. Santa Clause: nope, never did
85. Kiss on the first date: idek
86. Angels: *jung hoseok


87. Current best friend’s name: Maryam, Kawon, Alice, Diara, Madeline, Brianna, Gabe (idek about the last two cuz i havent actually gotten to do anything with them in a while so i dont even know if i can call them my BEST friends u know?… Im kinda just questioning my life rn)
88. Eye color: dark brown
89. Favorite movie: I dont watch movies tht often so im not sure

Alrighty then time for tags and shit

@cinnaminsuga-kookie @bang-tan @psychodra @shaybear456 @btssmutgalore

Have fun :)

Originally posted by syubto

I Wished [Rap Monster Angst]


When you have a husband as an idol, you don’t and can’t spend much time together. But when he doesn’t come home not just because of his job, but because he’s tired of you, you feel like shit.

It was either a “Hi” or “Bye”. Nothing more, nothing less. It has now been 2 months since Namjoon started to ignore you but what could you do? Your marriage wasn’t even official.

“Hey… it’s me, Y/N. It’s our second anniversary today as a married couple. I cooked your favorite food and I have something I want to tell you. Give me a call, yeah? I love you” you said to the voicemail. The dinner was waiting in the kitchen and it was already 10pm. You didn’t always wait for him until this late, but today was something special and you wanted to surprise him. If he even came home…

30 minutes passed, and soon 1 hour, 2 hours and 4 hours passed. He’s not coming home today either. He doesn’t even remember what day it is.

With a sigh you got up from the couch and went to your shared bedroom where you changed from the beautiful dress to one of his t-shirts. You placed back the dress in the closet and got ready for bed when the front door opened.

He was home.

You stepped out of the bathroom and saw Namjoon taking of his shirt before turning around to you. You gave him a weak smile and walked towards him and wrapped your arms around his torso. You could hear him let out an annoyed sigh but he patted your back lightly.

This wasn’t what you wanted, you wanted his warm hugs and his passionated kisses. You missed him, you missed the Namjoon that loved you endlessly and could do anything for you.

“Where have you been?” you asked in a low voice, not letting go of him even if you knew that you had to.

“Just out with the boys and some girls from the stylist team” he answered carelessly. You gulped and nodded slightly.

“Did you get my voicemails?” you asked and looked at him. Namjoon was confused, which meant that he hasn’t got them yet.

“No? Then… just delete them later” you said a little too harsh. But he deserved it, not only did he forget about your anniversary, but he even went out with the noonas and the boys without telling you or giving you a call saying that he would be home late.

What’s your problem, Y/N?” he asked and looked at you, his eyes burning with anger. “I can’t even go out and have some fun now? I have to be at home like a little baby with you just because we’re married? Seriously, Y/N? I have my own life you know. I’m still young for fúck’s sake and I have friends unlike you” he continued without thinking about your feelings.

You just starred at him, tears forming in your eyes while you tried so hard not to show him your weak side.

You were quiet, which made Namjoon think that he could talk more about your flaws. He insulted you without regreting it. He said those words like he meant it and it hurt.

Yeah thought so, please think twice before you talk to me like you’re my mother when you’re not even a mother yourself” he said and pushed you back a little, giving him space so he could go to the bathroom and get ready for bed.

You looked down at your little bumpy stomach and bit your bottom lip as hard as you could, almost so hard that you could taste the blood. You’re not even a mother yourself.

It was many kind of thoughts in your head. Sad ones, angry ones but most of all, you were broken, so broken. You were tired of him always making you mad about the most ridiculous things. You were tired of the way he treated you and you were tired of your feelings for him. Why couldn’t you just stop those feelings?

Namjoon came out from the bathroom and without giving you a glance, he took his pillow and walked out of your shared bedroom. Leaving you there by yourself, once again.

That night you couldn’t sleep even if you closed your eyes and counted to 100. Everything went wrong. Your marriage wasn’t supposed to be like this.

Walking out to the livingroom with your bag of clothes, you saw him asleep on the couch with his long legs spread on the backrest. You couldn’t help but smile a little. That was the man you fell in love with. The Namjoon who was funny and weird.

You knelt down beside him and looked at him, every part of his face. You lifted up your hand and placed it on his cheek, caressing it slowly.

“I love you, so much” you muttered, tears falling down your cheeks. But I can’t keep letting you hurt me.

“Namjoon-ah, we’re having a baby… I was going to tell you about it today actually. But… everything went not as planned. I wished we could go through this together, bu-but I don’t think I can handle this anymore, Namjoon-ah” you continued, talking to yourself but still to him. You somehow wished that he could hear you.

“I’m leaving now, jagiya”


Oh God, I’m seriously crying. I cried WHILE writing this, is that normal? It’s not just me, right? Because holy pigs, this Namjoon angst was so freaking heartbreaking. I can’t even handle this right now.

But what did you guys think of it? Should I do part 2? Yes/No? Let me know!

Thank you sooo very very very much for all the support from my earlier BTS scenario (One Last Time). I really appreciate it! So thank you, thank you, thank you!


Originally posted by sayjjanhae

Originally posted by smothereign

A Scary Movie

Anonymous said: Hi! Are you still doing the ship+smut thing? I’d like to request one, but first I must say: I honestly admire you so much for taking the time and effort to do it! Thank you for keeping us thirsty fangirls happy! So, I’m Kat, Japanese-Irish, ‘94 liner, 5'1 (so short T-T). My hair is currently in a black/turquoise ombre bob, and I wear Pororo-like glasses. I’m usually quiet, but tend to get hyper over things like pizza and puns. I love watching horror movies, rapping, and poetry. Thank you :*

Gah! You are so sweet! And you’re welcome! :D Being a thirsty fangirl myself, I’m glad I can feed other’s addictions XD I have to say, your hair sounds so cool, and I wish I could see it in person. Any who, after reading your request, I decided to ship you with Jackson! I think your quiet but sometimes personality would go well with Jackson (just like how Mark goes well with him), and it’d be cute if you rapped with him. I hope you enjoy the scenario that I picked out for you. :D

Summary: You and Jackson watch a scary moving, and you end up comforting each other afterwards.

Genre: Smut

Length: 1475

Jackson walked into your apartment holding a pizza and a bag from the movie rental store. He set the stuff on the counter and then kneeled in front of you, sitting on the couch. You watched Jackson curiously as he took your hand and looked into your eyes. “I carry your heart with me. I carry it in my heart. I am never without it. Anywhere I go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling. I fear no fate, for you are my fate, my sweet.” You smiled at Jackson. He had memorized a poem by E.E. Cummings just for you, knowing how much you loved poetry.

You took Jackson’s face in your hands and gave him a long kiss. “This doesn’t mean you’re getting out of watching the movie.” You stood up and walked over to the counter.

Keep reading

Parenting Life With Namjoon - Part 4


Genre: Too much Fluff

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |

“Oh my god what time Is it?” You look at your clock beside you. It was the weekend, you could stay in. You sighed and turned around. Namjoon’s arm wrapped around you and pulled you in closer. “How is my baby? And my Baby’s baby” He chuckled in his raspy morning voice, rubbing his hand on your stomach in slow circles. You were 8 months pregnant. Your due date was coming up soon and you couldn’t be more ready. Namjoon was great at supporting the family. He got everything you needed and would be careful not to get on your nerves. “we’re both good, can you help me up?”
“Of course, hold on a second” He got up and walked around to your side of the bed, he pulled your hands carefully up until you were standing, “you good?” he asks
“yup, thank you”
You ate breakfast together while watching tv, “Namjoon” he looks up with you, his mouth full, “Hm?”
“Is there anything I can do for you? You’ve been so helpful for me, I can’t help but feel bad that you’re doing everything” He shook his head
“There’s nothing I need. You and the baby are the things that make me the most happy. So as long as you’re with me, I’ll be perfectly fine” he smiled, dimples showing, “I love you so much” you say as you get up, “I love you too, Here, give me your plate, I’ll clean”
“Last time you cleaned, you broke the plate. This is the least I can do. I’m sure you’re tired”
“I’m-” The doorbell rang. You both gave each other questionable looks before Namjoon went to go answer it, “oh my god”
“Hi Hyung!” they yelled cheerily, you peeked in and Jimin saw you, “Oh my god y/n! It’s been so long! Are you doing well?”
“Jimin!” You walk over as fast as you can before Jimin runs up to you instead, giving you a light hug, “How have you been? Are you doing well?”
“I’m doing great Jimin, thanks for-”
“IS IT A BOY OR A GIRL” Taehyung, Jungkook, and Hoseok squeeze through the door. Namjoon is shaking his head in the corner as he talks to Jin, “Childish as ever” he says, Jin agreeing
“It’s a girl” you smile back. Jungkook is looking around the house as Taehyung hands you a bunch of stuff, “Think of it as a baby shower” he smiles. You all gather around the living room and chat away, “I should probably make dinner for all of you guys. I wasn’t expecting guests but I’ll see what we have” you try to get up but Jin sits you back down, “We got this y/n. Don’t worry about it” You smile at the boys as they make your way into the kitchen.
Namjoon sits beside you and kisses your forehead as you rest on his shoulder, “Are you doing okay?”
“I’m fine”
“The boys are always childish, but they’re the best guys I have ever met” he tells you while looking at them in the kitchen, dancing around.
“I Agree”
Namjoon leans into your stomach, you just smile at him, “You’ll be beautiful, just like your mother” You rest a hand on your stomach and he kisses it. “I’m hungry” you say, “You guys finished?”
“Yeah, we just did” Jin answers back, setting the last dish on the table, “come and eat!” He made a feast, “My god Jin, You’re amazing! And this is delicious!”
“Thank you, I know” he smiles as he eats. After dinner, half of the boys fell asleep on the couch. Jin was talking to Namjoon and you were with Taehyung and Jungkook. Taehyung was showing you how all the stuff that he got for you, works. “You really know your stuff Tae”
“Yup, I love children” His rectangle smile shoes. You turn to Jungkook, “Got a girlfriend Kookie?”
“No” Taehyung answers for him. Jungkook looks away shyly, “He’s staying with me for now”
“I see” you pat Jungkook on the shoulder, “The time will come kooks, you just have to wait”
“I know… But I wish I could have a family like you and hyung”
“Well kookie, you’re always welcome to visit here” he smiles brightly at you before going towards the couch to the sleeping Jimin. But he stopped right before and turned around to face you
“What are you going to name her?”

I had a really hard time trying to find a name ;-;

~Admin Luna

Trouble (Chapter 2)

Yoongi x Reader

Part 1 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

When a mysterious stranger catches your attention, you find yourself seduced by his darkness and curiosity overpowers you. As you unknowingly fall for him, he introduces you to a world where pain and pleasure are synonymous and your darkest, inner-most desires are unleashed. But how do you keep from hurting when the lines between lust and torture become blurred.


I coughed loudly and hard, trying to clear my throat of whatever invisible obstruction was choking me as mystery boy watched me and thumped my back lightly.

“You okay?” he asked in a deep, lazy voice that grumbled pleasurably against my ears. I nodded yes and avoided his eyes in embarrassment as I downed the last of the sweet alcohol in my cup, trying to soothe my esophagus. The boy dropped his hand slowly down my back and finally released me, leaving me both relieved and disappointed from the loss, and motioned for the bartender to come his way.

“Another drink for…-“ he looked at me, waiting for me to say my name.

“Oh, (Y/N)..” I provided.

“Another of whatever (Y/N) is drinking and a bottle of soju for me, please. Thank you.”

“Thank you.” I awkwardly dipped my head in a half bow, unsure of how to greet him.

“Ah, you don’t have to do that, let’s be informal. You look the same age as me anyways. My name is Suga, by the way.”

“Suga? That’s unique.” I was 90% sure that was just a nickname but I didn’t press him to tell me his birth name. “And I was born in 1993..”

“See, were the same age, I was also born in 1993.”

He turned away from me for a moment to look at what the bartender was doing and I silently watched his profile, noticing that his pale hair wasn’t completely white but had hints of a faded minty color still clinging to his roots. His eyes, although they were of an Asian shape, were still different and unique compared to the typical Korean features. Korean eyes usually had a soft, gradual sloping shape, but his had a high front slope and then a strong decline, similar to a typical Scalene Triangle. He had a straight, rounded nose, slightly puckered lips and a sharp jaw line that I really wanted to run my finger across. I quickly averted my eyes as he glanced down at me and smiled a gummy smile, its cuteness a total contrast to the sexy dangerous, demeanor he gave off. A deep chuckled rumbled through his chest at my embarrassment and I heard him say,

“You shouldn’t stare, it’s rude…”

Before I could stop the words, they tumbled out of my mouth and spilled into the air.

“I- I’m not staring, I was just admiring… you. You’re hair, I mean, it’s cool….” I finished lamely. Why did I say that, what is wrong with me, how embarrassing.

“Ah, thank you, I like your hair too.” his hand reached out and he grabbed a strand close to my face and his fingertips skimmed my burning cheek. My face felt numb and tingly where he had touched it, as if he had injected my skin with Novocain. My eyes opened wider at the intimate contact and I couldn’t help but wonder what his eyes looked like at that moment, so I looked up. What a mistake that was, for when I looked up, what I saw made a fire burn in the pit of my stomach, and it wasn’t from the alcohol.

His dark eyes reflected the lights and strobes that shot out everywhere inside the club and they looked like pictures of the galaxy; black with swirls and points of color and white, sparkly and entrancing. His face was slightly shadowed from the dark atmosphere and the electric blue lights that lit up the shelves holding bottles of liquor behind the bar bathed his face in blue, giving him a beautiful ethereal feel. I wondered if I looked the same.


Our eyes snapped apart and his hand fell from my hair as a green glass bottle of soju and a tumbler was placed in front of him and another blue drink slid my way. I grabbed it and began stirring until the white mixed with the blue and became a milky, baby blue color and watched him pour soju into his cup from the corner of my eye. His hands were nice, slightly veiny with slim, long fingers with clean, trimmed nails. He wore a couple rings and one metal link bracelet around his wrist. The silver complimented the white of his skin and coupled with the blue lights, his smooth skin gave off a cool tone.

He finished pouring the soju and raised his glass to his lips and took a long drink, tipping back his head slightly, and his adam’s apple bobbed slightly as he swallowed. When he set his glass back down, he glanced my way and I smiled nervously at him and tried to hide my blush by using my hand to cover face. He looked at me for a moment before speaking.

“Whats a girl like you doing in a place like Seoul, anyways? Where are you from?”

“I’m from America. I’m here to teach English, but I really just wanted to travel and experience new things…”

“Ahh, I see. Where in America are you from? New York, Chicago, L.A.?” His interest seemed genuinely interested, he was looking at me with alert eyes, an open face, and his lips were slightly parted as he breathed, the black sweater covering his chest rising and falling slowly.

“I’m from St. Louis, but I lived in Chicago for 2 years though. Where are you from?” I asked, more curious about him than I was eager to talk about myself.

“I was born in Daegu, I’m the pride of Daegu, actually. You should be honored to meet me.” he boasted, a smirk on his pretty face and one eyebrow raised.

“Ah, I’m so honored to meet you, really, the pleasure is all mine.” I quipped sarcastically, with a wide smile.

We talked like this for a while, sipping our drinks and learning more about each other, getting dangerously flirty with every minute. Be both had many shared interests like music, photography, and art and neither of us were very social people, we preferred to stay home and do our own thing. He told me about his group of friends that I saw earlier, who were also his band mates and how they were all like brothers, very supporting and loving of one another. Suga told me he rapped and produced some of their music which made me want to hear him rap, naturally.

“Seriously?! You have to show me now or else I won’t believe you.”

“Ah, no, I can’t. I’m not prepared…” he said, slightly flustered, his cheeks turning the lightest shade of pink as he averted his eyes and focused on the bottle of soju between us.

“Oh come on, Pride of Daegu, show me what makes you so amazing.” I teased.

“Please? Pleaaaaaaase!? Please, please, please–”

“Yah! Stop, stop. I’ll make you a deal. If you grant me three wishes, I’ll show you. Fair?”

In my mind I thought ‘how is that fair’ but out loud I said,

“Fine! Sure, whatever, ill grant you three wishes, what are they?” as I waved my hands in the air, dismissing his demands, however outrageous they could be, I didn’t care at that moment. My face was flushed and my body felt too loose and relaxed but I also felt very open to the outside world, as if an invisible veil had been pulled aside. The alcohol had freed my inhibitions and there was no voice in the back of my head telling me to behave. I didn’t notice when a dark glint entered Suga’s eyes and he stared me down, satisfied that his prey had fallen into his trap.

“Whatever I want?” he asked.

“UGH! I already said yes, now come on, rap already. Unless you can’t…”

“I’ll rap for you once you fulfill all three wishes, or else how do I know you’ll keep your promise?” his smirk grew until I could see his gums.

“AW come on. That’s not fair, at least give me a little taste. And I swear I’ll keep my promise, I always do.”

“If you come home with me, I will.”

This time his voice wasn’t as teasing, it was much more serious and dark. The air felt like it held a scale and my answer would tip the balance in one direction or the other. Looking back, this was probably the very moment that my life changed course, forever affected by Suga and never the same.

-So tell me, says the bartender in my vision. -What seems to be the matter?
-I don’t know, I tell him, morose. I dip a finger in my shot glass, twirl it around, lick the whiskey off with a flourish.
-Surely there’s something.
-Oh, there’s always something.
-So what is it this time? He presses, wiping a glass clean with a rag, a figure from an old film.
-It’s my mind, I say. -Always my mind, fucking awful thing. Wish I could crack my head like an egg.
-Do you? He asks, laughing at me.
-You’re in my vision, I say, my voice sharp as a schoolmaster. I would rap his knuckles if I had something to reach them with. -You don’t laugh at me.
-You laugh at yourself, he chides. -That’s how you grow.
-I know that, I tell him, sullen, and put my face down on the bar. The scuffed wood chills my feverish skull.
Quick as a fluttering moth he reaches under and pulls out a second shot glass, pours himself a shot and climbs over the bar to sit next to me. The piano tinkles on, but the piano player left two hours ago drunk as a cat and staggering, I remember it.
-Child, the bartender intimates, listen. -Do you wanna grow, change?
-Of course.
-Do you know what you have to do? Now he is the schoolmaster.
-I don’t know, I answer, though I do. I just don’t want to say it.
The lights are even dimmer now, and the piano is quieter, and there is a vast nothingness that surrounds me and this man and our section of the bar.
-You have to let go, he says. He makes a POOF gesture with his hands.
-Let go of what? I am reluctant to listen. My cheek is smushed against liquor stains.
-You’ll know, he says. And I do know, but I keep my tight grip, and the night rolls on and the days pass like flower petals in the wind, always blowing me into another life before I’ve finished the first.
And still I cannot let go.
—  excerpt from Blackbirds, 2013, unfinished zine about dreams.
I'm getting really tired of this.

Just some thoughts I have to get out there. I’m just so sick of people and small talk. I find it annoying and timewasting. I wish I could talk to people about all the cool music and movies I like. I would like for people to talk to me about their pets, their hobbies. I really have no interest in sports or meaningless, horrible pop music and mainstream rap. I just wish people were more into deeper things. I wish I could relate to more people. I wish people were more introverted and didn’t need to be surrounded by tons of people. I kinda feel more comfortable around awkward people. I wish all of you would be more true to yourself and not try so hard to fit in. I mostly really despise people.That is all.


lmaooo I wanna attend to the group chat again but I’m writing all these posts!! I always get rid of notifs on tumblr as soon as I see them as long as I’m on my laptop ahhhhhh. anyhow ILY ILY ILY!!you are one of the funniest ppl I know. I’d be sitting out in public reading our group chats and just giggle to myself and wish I could explain to people wtf I’m laughing at that’s so important to disturb them. ok amybe I’m being exteme with my words rn but anyways.. I also remember this one time I was at my cousins’ house and told them about your blog since they’re on tumblr too and stuff and we listened to this rap song and my cousin was like “plz turn that off.” and yeah even now you send the most random/obscure songs and it just Blesses me.

of course you’ve also got a soft sensitive side and it’s sweet and I like that we’ve gotten to the point in our mutual-ness/friendship of telling each other anything, even things we think we coulda posted on tumblr but instead just say to each other now. and thank u for being friends with sweetlana!! it’s been a pleasure gaining more friends from you.

you’ve had a pretty cool impact on my life. I hope we stay friends!!

ps danny tanner has a middle name………

Three’s a Crowd

Summary: Namjoon’s annoying girlfriend gets on your last nerve, causing friction between you and your best friend

Genre: All the angst 

Part 2 | Part 3

Originally posted by go2bedjungkook

    ‘Wish we could turn back time, to the good ol’ days, when our mama’s sang us to sleep but now we’re stressed out.’ 

 Stressed out blared from my headphones, while i sat staring at my best friend Namjoon, and his girlfriend of six months argue for the umpteenth time that night. Krystal was sitting on his lap, her long athletic legs dangling over his knee,  picking at his shirt. She was annoyingly pretty and wearing only a short halter dress, despite the chill in the air. Even though i had music up incredibly loud i was still able to occasionally hear her shrill voice over the music.

   “What…doing here… such… bitch.” When she spoke the last word she was looking right at me. I could tell Joonie was annoyed with whatever Krystal had said but she continued glaring at me. Rolling my eyes, i popped the left earbud out of my ear.

   “Did you want something?” My tone was cold and apathetic. The bitch had been an outright terror towards me since the day we were introduced, Always whining and complaining about my constant presence in his life. So after six months of pretending to like her for Namjoon’s sake, i was completely mentally drained. I gave zero fucks about her, so why pretend?

   “I was just asking Jooniepoo what you were even doing here? I mean this is a party for people that actually matter.” I rolled my eyes at the ridiculous nickname and glanced around the dimly lit backyard. It had been completely packed a few hours ago with relatives and friends for Namjoon’s Birthday but no one was even out here anymore. If i looked in through the sliding glass door to the house i could see Jackson talking to Jimin in the living room. But besides that, everyone had gone to sleep, or back to their own homes. I let a breathe go out of my nose in annoyance and looked her straight in her dark eyes.

   “I wasn’t aware that his birthday party was a VIP event, my mistake. But you do know that you were only invited because you’re Jooniepoo’s fuck buddy right?” Krystal sucked in a breath and looked up at Namjoon with an expression that could only be described as a wounded puppy. But on her face it looked more like the face those kids on toddlers and tiara’s make before they throw a fit. I expected her to start yelling at me or crying but that didn’t happen. Instead it was Namjoon that looked pissed off.

   “Seriously Y/N? What the hell is wrong with you!” He set Krystal down on the bench next to him and strode over to where i was sitting.

   “Get up.” His voice wasn’t loud, which scared me a little bit. I stood slowly and he grabbed my arm pulling me inside. While being yanked through the hallway toward his bedroom i made eye contact with Jackson for a few seconds, who started to ask what was up but the question was left unanswered when the door was slammed behind me. I scurried over to his dresser and hopped on top of it, beginning to half ass my apology..

   “Joonie, i’m sorry she just-”

   “No excuses y/n, i’m sick of you treating krys like shit. She’s my fucking girlfriend! I don’t get it,” He stopped when he was directly in front of me to glare. “she’s been nothing but sweet to you.” i was taken aback. Sweet?! I don’t think there was ever a time when she was sweet to me.

   “Krystal is anything but sweet Namjoon, You fucking her doesn’t change the fact that she’s an actual demon.” I pushed him hard in the chest for emphasis and he didn’t move an inch.

   “She doesn’t even love you! she’s just using you, but because you’re such a narcissistic idiot you can’t see past her body and the fact that she to worships the ground you walk on because you’re an idol! I never knew you were this shallow.” I maneuvered my body past his and got to my feet, ready to walk out the door but his voice stopped me.

   “Why can’t you just be happy that i’m happy y/n! I’m sorry that i don’t love you the way that you love me but you don’t have to take it out on every girl i date!” Silence fell over the room, my hand felt like it was glued to the door knob. I felt hot from my chest up to the top of my head and before i knew what i was doing my hand flew straight across his face. Namjoon’s eyes were full of guilt and anger, and mine were full of tears.

   “You know what Namjoon, I was wrong. You and Krystal are perfect for each other.”

   “y/n, wait a second.” he reached his hand toward me and i shoved him back, refusing to look at his face. In my peripherals i saw his shoulders slump down but quickly correct themselves.

   “Fine, if you’re going to be like that then i think you should go. I don’t have time to babysit you anymore.”  With that i opened the door and ran straight into the she demon herself. I caught her smirk before it turned into a look of pity.

    “Three’s a crowd anyways y/n.”

    “Fuck you.” my shoulder rammed itself against her before i shuffled down the hallway and out the front door, ignoring Jackson’s concerned questions. when i finally got into my car i broke down.

           The car roared to life about 10 minutes later when i finally calmed down enough to drive home, and Stressed Out was playing once again. Funny, i felt like the words held new meaning now.

        ‘Wish we could turn back time, to the good ol’ days, when our mama’s sang us to sleep but now we’re stressed out.’  

    i wasn’t sure if i’d regret falling for my best friend. But i sure as hell knew id regret losing him.

this is a short series, so there will be two more parts and an epilogue if y’all like it! the next part will have smut so be pepared! ;) 

-D ( i feel like i should go by midge though since everyone else has a cute nickname ahh) 

BTS when they have to reject you

GET THE TISSUES READY EVERYONE! This is my masterpiece I swear

I’m kind of taking you to dramaland again: Sometimes two people seem meant to be, yet for some reason they can’t be together at the time. Imagine BTS having to tell you that they cannot become your boyfriend (now)~ 


 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Jin: You were having a home-cooked dinner with Jin the night before they started their comeback promotions. Spaghetti were dangling from your mouth over your chin (because you couldn’t get enough and stuffed it in all at once), and Jin chuckled. He removed some of the noodles with his thumb, then stopped the movement half-way through and sighed heavily. 

You: “[mouth still full of spaghetti] Oppa, is something wrong?”

Jin: “[smiling sadly] It’s just that….you are so cute and…perfect really. I just wish I could be your boyfriend after all this time. But it’s not yet possible, I’ve got to work and then there’s military service and it will take so much time … I’m so sorry. ______, I’m so selfish that I wish you’d wait for me, but I know that it would be wrong to keep you from dating a man who can give you all the love you deserve. The only thing I can ask for is that please, keep me as your friend, your big brother. I want to take care of you, even if I can’t become your boyfriend.” 

*Jin taking care of you*

Originally posted by mxknae


Yoongi had been working day and night in this studio the whole past month. He hadn’t asked you to be his girlfriend yet, but you really hoped he would ask soon. In the meantime, you dropped by as often as you could, careful to bring food and to try to comfort him when he got in a bad mood. This evening, he was proudly showing you a new composition that he had worked on for the last two weeks. You had tears in your eyes when the song finished. Yoongi grinned proudly at your reaction but he quickly got serious again:

Yoongi: “Actually, _____, I need to tell you something.”

You: “What is it, oppa?”

Yoongi: “See…[sigh] I really, really like you, _____. I wish I could be your boyfriend, right now, I love you that much. I’ve seen you waiting for me to ask you over the past weeks, and it pained me so much. I’m sorry I put you through this. The truth is, I really need to improve my career right now, and I can’t date you because I simply don’t have time for anything besides BTS. I’m very sorry. The only thing I can do is compose better songs for you to listen to, that’s the only way I can love you right now” 

Originally posted by jungkooksleigh

Rap Monster

Namjoon was on tour with BTS and you were going crazy because that meant you couldn’t call or text him whenever you wanted anymore. You managed to keep quiet for a few days, but after a week or so you send him a whiny text. That evening, you got a call from Namjoon:

Namjoon: “Hey, _____! I saw your text~ How are you?”

You: “Oppa! Aren’t you tired? I’m sorry I send that text, I just …. I don’t even know, I guess I missed you that much.”

Namjoon: “ [Sigh] I know…I know and I’m so sorry. I need to tell you something, and I hate myself for doing it over the phone rather than in person. But I don’t want you to wait for my explanation another two months until we come back to Korea. _____, it’s …. it’s not that I don’t like you, I like you so much. I’d want you to be my girlfriend if things were differently. If I weren’t part of BTS, I’d really want us to be a couple. But right now it’s not possible. I need to work hard to succeed. Please know that you are more special to me than any other girl, but I can’t be with you, at least not now. I’m very sorry.”

Originally posted by rapmonstrous

J-Hope: Oh god poor Hobi

Hobi had wanted to tell you for a long time that due to the pressure from fans and the public eye in general, he wasn’t ready to date yet. But whenever you held to him tightly, or looked up to him smiling, or just walked next to him, he couldn’t bring himself to tell you the truth. Now however, things had changed. You two had watched a movie at the dorm and you’d made a joke about what it would be like dating him which made Hobi decide that the longer waited, the more he’d hurt you. 

Hobi: “[laughing] actually…. [getting serious] actually, ______, we need to talk about this.”

You: “Oh - it was just a joke, oppa, don’t worry”

Hobi: “[sigh] I know…I know that. ______, I really like you. I like you, and I really wish I had the courage to make you my girlfriend. But I’m too scared of dating you, since idols and their partners get so much crap. I don’t want this to happen to us, you’re too precious to me. So, even though I love you, we can never be more than friends - that is, as long as I’m a member of BTS. I’m so sorry, please forgive me.”

Originally posted by hoseokwhy

Jimin: You were visiting Jimin at the dorm, the two of you talking over hot chocolate and cookies, and exchanging the news of the past few weeks. It was rare that you could meet Jimin in private and in a relaxed atmosphere like this, usually you just got a few calls a month and some quick texts inbetween broadcasts and concerts to check on you. You were just telling Jimin that you suffered from not having a boyfriend, no one to truly care for you, when he lost his smile and got sad instead. 

You: “It’s such a stupid wish, really, but I’d love to have someone just for me. Someone who takes good care of me, and who really loves me.”

Jimin: “Nuna - that’s ….I ….”

You: “I know, Jimin, I shoulnd’t be telling you this. Nuna is being silly again.”

Jimin: “No, that’s not it, no. [Sigh] I would be your boyfriend. I would ask you, I’d be your perfect boyfriend, but I can’t. All I ever do is practice, eat and sleep. I have no time to love you like you deserve. But I love you , nuna, so so much. Please don’t despair. I know guys adore you, and I know that someone will come soon. I wish I could be that someone, but I can’t, and I regret it very much.”

Originally posted by the-rap-man


You had fooled around with Taetae for almost 2 years now, and during that time, you had slowly fallen in love with him. You were sure that he felt love for you too, considering he gave you a genuine smile whenever your eyes met and even cuddled with you during movie nights. On Valentine’s day, you decided to buy him chocolate, hoping he’d get the hint and finally ask you out. It wasn’t until later, when Taehyung had returned home and been informed by Namjoon that your chocolate could be meant as a subtle hint, that he realized that he’d never told you how he really felt. On the scheduled meeting the next day, he cleared his throat and began to explain: 

Taehyung: “_______, thank you …..thank you so much again for the chocolate. I was so stupid that I didn’t realize what you were trying to say before. I know now that you really like me, right? I like you so much, too. If I wanted to have a girlfriend, it would only be you. But…the reason I didn’t even notice that you liked me so much is that I just cannot afford to have a girlfriend right now. I have so much work to do, and as much as I love you, I also love the fans who show us so much support. I don’t want to be your boyfriend until BTS is over. Only then can I give you my full heart. You deserve so much better than only half of it, I’m so sorry.”

Originally posted by taehyungifs

Jungkook: You had attended the same school as Kookie and he even sat next to you in music class. After graduation tough, you’d lost sight of each other. A year and a half later, you’d been informed by a member of your girl group that BTS was attending the same event as you, and when you found them changing and getting styled, you were able to establish contact with Kookie again. It felt as though no time had passed at all. He was still as talented and funny as you remebered him. A few months later, after he’d come off age, Kookie took you out for some Soju and karaoke. In his drunk state, half-slurring the words into the microphone, Kookie made his confession: 

Jungkook: “______, I’m so glad I met you again. You are so ….perfect, you are perfect. And you’ve gotten even prettier since your debut, so much prettier and so much more confindent. But then again ….I’m also sad that I met you again.”

You: “What? Why? Did I do anything wrong?”

Jungkook: “No! no no no! No, it’s me. It’s all me. See, I like you. I like you so much. I’ve never been in love before but I think right now, with you, that’s it. I love you, ______. But I can’t be your boyfriend. That’s why I’m sad: I know the most perfect girl in the world, and I can’t have her. Two idols dating - I don’t want that for us. I don’t want all the rumors, and the hateful comments. I’m so sorry that I won’t be the one making you happy. I wish, I so wish I could be the one, but I can’t.”

Originally posted by theking-or-thekid

BTS Jungkook is Overrated

Now don’t get me wrong, i love BTS and i am a Army. Their actually my favorite boy group now. But i feel like Jungkook is so overrated in BTS. You don’t even have to watch all of BTS’s mv to notice it. In ‘Just One Day’ jungkook’s face appear like unstoppable on Suga’s part. I mean like,  it’s Suga, one of the most underrated BTS member, so let him shine. And isn’t J-Hope the main/best dancer? Then why is jungkook doing more dancing then J-hope is? And Jimin is also the main vocalist but jungkook is overshining him too much. I get it, he can rap, dance and sing but c’mon let the other member shine too. In ‘Graduation Song’ jungkook probably appear like 90% of the time in there while Jimin and J-hope are just like ‘in the background’. I just wish BigHit would stop making jungkook be the center of everything. Please give members like Jin, Suga and Rapmon time to shine. Suga is amazingly hot and talented i don’t know how he could be that underrated. Jin is the visual but he’s soo un-noticable/underrated. And Rapmon’s rapping is one of the greatest. So i just wish BigHit ent. would give these members time to shine instead of selling jungkook’s face everywhere.