timeless gem

804: The Deadly Mantis

Dear Janet from Devil Fish: I’m sorry I called you the world’s worst paleontologist.  That was mean and entirely undeserved – you are a much better paleontologist than Dr. Jackson from The Deadly Mantis.  You at least realize that sharks are a type of jawed fish, while Dr. Jackson seems to think they’re a type of plant.  I would send you chocolates or something along with this apology, but you got strangled by a man with a concrete face.  Too bad the same thing cannot be said of Dr. Jackson.  Yours sincerely, the MST3K Project.

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anonymous asked:

Stevidot is pedophillia? 14 and a 500+ year old? Jaspidot makes sense though. It's likely just as much as an age difference as Lapidot or Pearlmethyst. (huge age difference with those ships but they're not Pedophillia like Stevidot though.) I know you want to validate ships and say Peridot is "child coded" but no, confirmed by the crewniverse, she is an adult gem. Greg and Rose were far apart in age as well, but Greg was an adult. The only Stevidot that's "ok" is if Steven were an adult. (18+)

*Taps pencil* Ready to be schooled?

Pedophilia is a psychological disorder in which an adult human feels sexually attracted to prepubescent children, typically under the age of 13. The disorder itself isn’t illegal, we can’t help who or what we are attracted to I’m afraid, but it is illegal for those people who act on the sexual urges.

The disorder itself is quite disturbing, but it is a mental illness. And like many mental illnesses, it can’t be cured, only lessened. Typically through therapy. Many people who have pedophilia won’t get the help they need with it because of the social stigma it carries.

Are there people who enjoy having it and revel in it? Yeah, and those people are disgusting and need to be locked up permanently. But there are many who do have it who don’t want it, so they hide it the best they can, or use fictional characters as a way to cope with it. (I’m not speaking through experience, I’m an asexual who has no sexual attraction to anybody or anything, lol. I’m basing it off of people I’ve seen do this.)

Now, how does this apply to Stevidot? Well, for one thing, Steven’s 14, and will most likely be 15 by the end of the show. That takes him out of the age range for pedophilia. Two, Peridot isn’t a growing, organic life-form like humans, cats, dogs, etc… She’s a literal rock that can manipulate light in a way that allows her to form a human-like body. Also, gems don’t grow like humans. Once their gems have taken in the needed substances during their incubation period, something allows them to form a body of light for the first time, and thus they come to “life”. Gems don’t have a concept of child, teenager, and adult like humans have in their society. The only growing they can do is mentally. Plus, I highly doubt Peridot would know what a pedophile is.

Third, gems are timeless, ageless beings. Well, they have ages, but they don’t matter in the long run because they can live for millennia. Maybe even millions of years. It’s basically like the Peter Pan syndrome in a way for some gems. (Which, btw, the Wendy and Peter Pan ship was canon, yet there is no outrage against that.)

Fourth, listen to yourself. “Jaspidot and Lapidot are okay even though they have huge age gaps as well.” What, just because they are “adult” gems? There’s a huge mental age gap with those ships because age means nothing to gems. I’d definitely say there is a problem with your logic on that one.

And finally, Greg and Rose, while a beautiful relationship, is still very weird. He was dating and having sex with a different species. An alien species at that. What would that be called? Oh yeah, xenophilia. At least Steven is half gem in this regard.

On a final note, most of us Stevidot shippers don’t expect them to hop in bed right away. I like to imagine Steven would be the kind of guy to wait until the time was right. On top of that, they’d have to work on their relationship, both of them would probably be pants at the whole romance thing, ha ha ha. Well, Peridot far more than Steven.

In other words, most of us prefer the cute, romance aspect of Stevidot. Which, if you might not know, is not illegal between a minor and adult (if for some reason you still see Peridot and any gem as a human adult) if the parent(s) consent to it. Greg would definitely be supportive of it, he’d be a huge hypocrite otherwise.

Cheers!

(PS: IT’S A FICTIONAL CARTOON COUPLE, HURR DURR.)

An Ode to Eastside Stevie

Peace to the recently deceased Yung Gawd Steven Rodriguez aka Eastside Stevie aka A$AP Yams. I woke up last morning do my daily social media ritual to see a flood of tributes to Yams, leaving me to say, “WTF dawg”. When a man has a plethora of fly ass nicknames, you can bet that his personality is as colourful as the codeine cups he sippeth.  The way Yams lived, I’m sure he wouldn’t want us mourning for too long. All though he leaves us with many questions, he also left us with timeless gems that had us all weak. His distinctive twitter presence will be dearly missed.  

 

Below we share Yams’s love for Goth bitches and much more. We have compiled his best “Goth Bitch” tweets and some other gems to celebrate the humour he bestowed upon us while he was here. Rest eazy Young Lord. 

From his time in rehab

Aint this the truth

More jox tweets :’)

RIP