I have now watched So Much Critical Role that I’m starting to notice everyone has their own styles of rollin’ dice and they’re all real cute
- Marisha sorta just drops hers but she lifts her hand way up in the air afterward like there’s RECOIL on that shit
- Sam leaves his hand up in the air too but it’s very Gilmore-esque. Quite elegant, 9/10 for style. “Ah yes, what is this thing that I rolled - ah, ‘tis garbage”
- Liam just tips his dice over like a cat knocking something off a shelf. Sometimes he does this sneaky lil finger twirl thing. tryin 2 be stealthy.
- Once in a while Laura holds dice in both hands. prayin to dice gods probably.
- Taliesin always shakes his dice back and forth a bunch of times - obviously one must warm the dice up before rolling if one wishes to guarantee a fuckton of nat 20s (Laura does this too, but Taliesin will do it for D A Y S)
- Travis has some nasty SPIN on that throw and sometimes he puts his SHOULDERS into it dude rolls dice like a MAN doin a SPORT and I love it
hey, can you break down the differences between the adventure zone and critical role for me? i haven't listened to either and now i'm curious
Oh gosh, okay. They’re delightful but… very different approaches to the same general idea (broadcasting a D&D game), and I think the fans of one show tend to have a sort of skewed impression of the other show, so here’s my thinking.
Just the basics, to begin with: The Adventure Zone started running in late 2014, and it’s an audio-only podcast in which the McElroy brothers and their dad start a brand-new D&D campaign from scratch. Critical Role started running in early 2015, and it’s a video podcast in which a bunch of best-friend voice actors started filming the D&D campaign they’d already been playing for years at home with the same characters. TAZ is (generally) prerecorded and lightly edited down, CR is 100% live. Both have a lot of howlingly funny and surprisingly touching moments, both get a lot more intense the more you get into them, and both are good shows that are a Good Time, especially when they make you feel things you didn’t sign up for. The main canon of TAZ is currently 56 one-hour-long episodes, with new episodes every two weeks, and CR is currently 85 four-hour-long episodes, with new episodes every week. Most of the reason for CR’s absurd length comes down to (a) three times as many players, and (b) no editing.
The DMs both put a ton of work into the world, but they also have very different approaches. Griffin (TAZ) is DMing for the first time, while Matt (CR) has talked about how DMing D&D games for the past 20 years is what got him interested in acting in the first place. The world of TAZ is much more of a sci-fi/fantasy hybrid, while CR sticks more to traditional fantasy.
TAZ plays fast and loose with the rules, which can be both a delight and a frustration for storytelling reasons—for instance, until the latest arc both spell slots and HP were not really tracked, which means (a) Griffin has had to come up with incredibly creative ways of introducing risk and limitations to the game, and (b) those incredibly creative ways can start to get pretty damn brutal. The mechanics of the game feel like an imposition on the story, most of the time—it’s rare that you get a dice roll that makes a huge difference to the plot (but when you do, as in the most recent episode, it’s pretty darn cool). As a result, the biggest spanner in the works of Griffin’s plans tends to be in the form of out-of-the-box thinking from his players, which they excel at; I think there is a tendency to railroad the plot as a result, but it’s a good story and it’s well worth a little bit of elbowing to keep everyone on track. Magical items also play a huge role, with viewers of the show submitting awesome new trinkets for the heroes of the story to use/abuse/completely forget about.
Because CR tilts more towards the rulebook (although Matt gets more than his fair share of shit for homebrewing and letting things slide and defaulting to the Rule of Cool), chance plays a much bigger role in the story. Matt’s simultaneously battling some incredibly creative players and dice that seem determined to roll as dramatically as possible. Entire subplots have been wiped out by a strategic roll, and in order to be able to adapt to that on the fly, Matt has to be hyper-prepared and have a lot of possible branching points. It’s absurdly open-world, especially now that the characters have the ability to travel instantly through different planes of existence, and Matt keeps pace with a story that feels more character-led than DM-led; railroading is practically nonexistent, which means you get incredible plot developments and super-deep characterization… but it also sometimes leads to long circular conversations trying to figure out what to do next. Because the players are all actors, there’s also a lot more that’s just straight-up improv theater: it’s not unusual (especially lately) to go for verrrry long stretches of riveting conversation without anybody rolling dice (I can think of a moment where Matt could’ve just had everyone fail a charisma saving throw against an NPC but instead just straight-up charmed them all in real life with words).
I’ll put it this way: CR is a basketball pickup game between friends who’ve been playing together so long that they kind of have their own home rules going and stick to them. TAZ is out there playing fuckin’ Calvinball. Both are great fun, but if you go into one expecting the other you’re in for a bad time.
Both shows have a lot of great NPCs, although Critical Role’s format gives them a lot more time and depth to shine (there are episodes where an NPC will have as much or more “screen time” than some of the player characters). Both shows have LGBT representation among player characters and NPCs alike that, while not perfect, is generally improving as the show goes on. For me personally, one of the more frustrating things about going from CR to TAZ was going from three female player characters and a metric fuckton of extremely deep characterization for all the female NPCs to no female player characters and many great and memorable female NPCs who nevertheless don’t get too much screentime or development just because of the the structure of the show.
TAZ is pretty shaky throughout the first arc (Griffin’s fighting a bit of an uphill battle getting everyone to sit down and actually play the game, which is funny in and of itself), but things slowly start to come together and the real potential of the show becomes clear once they break the heck out of the 5e Starter Set. I think the “Murder on the Rockport Limited” arc is what started to pull me in, and it’s not until the latest arc that I’m starting to get the character development I really crave in that show. Critical Role also takes a little while to find its footing, and to me the Briarwood arc (starting around episode 24) is where the mood of the show starts to solidify, with episode 40 and beyond really pushing from “this is cool, I’m enjoying how these interpretations of fantasy tropes are sometimes kinda unusual and off-the-wall!” to “how is this the most honest and genuine character development I’ve ever seen in media what the heck is happening here”.
So yeah. TAZ isn’t total chaos with no plot or effort put into it, CR isn’t a humorless wasteland of mathematical minutiae and rigid formulaic approaches. Both shows are great fun, both are IMO in an upswing and getting better and better as they go along, and I heartily recommend them both if you know what you’re getting into. Have fun!
The first rule of space travel, kids, is always check out distress beacons. Nine out of ten times it’s a ship full of dead aliens and a bunch of free shit! One out of ten times it’s a deadly trap, but… I’m ready to roll those dice!
Reminder: The first rule of space travel kids is always check out distress beacons. Nine out of ten times it’s a ship full of dead aliens and a bunch of free crap! One out of ten times it’s a deadly trap.
- 1 or 2 six-sided dice - paddle or something similar (water bottle, back of hairbrush, etc) - bondage rope (optional) - timer (optional)
- agree to a safeword - male partner is restrained to bed (optional), female partner in position of her choosing - use 1 six-sided dice for regular play, 2 six-sided dice for intense play
How to play:
- The female partner rolls the dice each round for seven rounds. Every time the dice is rolled, an action is performed based on the result.
- If the male partner can survive all seven consecutive rounds without giving in or using his safeword, he is permitted to fuck her/cum. Failure to complete all seven rounds means only she is given pleasure.
Rounds and their actions:
Roll #1: Slap
Male partner receives a number of slaps to the balls equal to the dice roll.
Roll #2: Punch
Male partner receives a number of punches to the balls equal to the dice roll.
Roll #3: Squeeze
With thumb and forefinger on each testicle, male partner’s balls are squeezed for a duration equal to 10 seconds multiplied by the dice roll. (for example, 1 = 10 seconds, 2 = 20 seconds, 3 = 30 seconds, etc.)
Roll #4: Respite
Male partner’s balls are massaged and dick sucked for a duration equal to 10 seconds multiplied by the dice roll. (for example, 1 = 10 seconds, 2 = 20 seconds, 3 = 30 seconds, etc.)
Roll #5: Squeeze
Same as Roll #3.
Roll #6: Punch
Same as Roll #2.
Roll #7: Paddle
Male partner receives a number of paddles to the balls equal to the dice roll. If no paddle, use kicks or knees.
Group History: Our DM’s custom world has a thing for potions going wrong. And I personally have a habit of accurately calling chance dice rolls ahead of time.
The Scene: Looters were in the enchanter’s shop, stealing whatever was at hand. We engage them to take the loot for ourselves. Throughout the fight, they start testing out the things they’ve stolen on us. After taking some damage, the looter’s leader, a city guard, does the following:
DM: “He pulls out a red potion and brings it to his lips.”
Player: “It’s acid isn’t it?”
DM: “Haha! Just for saying that, roll a d6.”
*I roll a 1.*
DM: “He drinks it, and starts gagging, and then drops dead.”
The first rule of space travel kids is always check out distress beacons. Nine out of ten times it’s a ship full of dead aliens and a bunch of free shit! One out of ten times it’s a deadly trap, but…I’m ready to roll those dice!
Critical Role fandom: I think I know what’s going on here
I think I figured out what the problem is here.
Every week, especially around big battles, there’s always this burst of negativity. Usually in the twitch chat and on reddit, but it’s on twitter and tumblr too. You all see it. People getting up in arms about rules, what it says in this book or that book, what a character “should” have done, etc.
Leaving aside all the vitriol directed at Keyleth as a character and Marisha Ray for being A Woman In Gaming, and Vax as a character for being Openly Depressed (I could rant about that for 500 years but the short of it is, you need to take a good hard look at yourself if you spend every week spewing hate at these characters for the “crimes” of Being a Woman and Being Depressed respectively. Please take some time and consider why it is you have all this hatred that you use to lash out against people, especially women, you might wanna work on why that is.) Leaving that aside, I think I have figured out the problem here:
There is a fundamental confusion on the part of some fans about what Critical Role is. It is NOT one of those nasty D&D games where the GM is your enemy and out to murder you. It IS a longform improv drama/comedy web series that is released weekly and is a massive company asset.
Whether or not Lup’s full name is “Chalupa,” the idea that Lup is Taako’s twin really gets more plausible the more I think of it.
We can take it as more or less fact that Lup is the Red Robe Taako got the Umbra staff from, since it wrote her name on the wall in an attempt to communicate.
She was also probably the one Barry Red Robes loved since he almost lost his form when he heard they’d found her, and since the voice in Taako’s head said “love Barry.”
It’s also likely the voice in Taako’s head, the one that filled him with a feeling of intense love, was channeled through the Umbra staff in some way.
The Umbra Staff refused to be used by Magnus, and instead leaped back to Taako’s hand when he tried to loan it to him. Presumably Lup and Magnus were friends as well, so that provides pretty strong evidence she has a special connection to Taako that she doesn’t have to the others.
Something that at the time was just the result of a dice roll but might be retconned into the narrative–Merle tried to take the Umbra staff and it threw him off. Taako was able to grab it successfully, possibly because he was the only one who the staff would allow to take it.
We know his connection to Lup is not a romantic connection since Taako is gay and Griffin wouldn’t put some random straight romance in his backstory that Justin had no say in. It’s possible they’re just very close for some other reason, of course, but a family relationship seems like the most obvious direction to go.
We’ve already seen sibling elves who became liches and who doesn’t love character parallels?
No matter how into board gaming you are, I’m sure you’re familiar with Risk. In fact, you probably have it in your attic right now. To catch you up to speed, it’s a world domination game in which you fight against a handful of other people to take over the Earth via brute force. (There’s no diplomacy or trading. You make the biggest army you can and try to make your buddies cry.) A lot of the game is based on rolling dice and building up territory, so later in the game, it can get a little slow and tedious rolling dice 47 times to take over Australia.
In 2012, Hasbro figured that the 50-year-old game was getting a little stale and released Risk Legacy. This isn’t just a re-skin. It’s a completely different game, and it was the first of its kind. This is a game that you play over and over with the same people across multiple sessions until a predetermined amount of games have been finished, changing the game as you go. But here’s the kicker: You can never play it again after that, because the game changes become permanent. This board game has actual spoilers.
The fact that she was lucky was fortunate for [Y/N]. When she cheated on a test, she didn’t get caught. When she ran red lights, she didn’t get caught. When she rolled dice, she got Yahtzee every time. When she stole expensive things from high-end retailers, the staff practically helped her pocket their merchandise. And she supposed it was some sort-of luck that she ended up in the same department store as a recently escaped convict.
She’d been in the process of casing the building, planning on returning at a later date to commit a felony, when a man strode in her direction. [Y/N] paid him no mind - she didn’t know him, and there was no reason to assume that he knew her, so she figured he’d carry on without much incident. How surprised she was to glance up from her cell phone only to be engulfed by a pair of strong, unfamiliar arms.
Instinctually, she made a move to scream, but her face was entirely smothered by a broad shoulder. Before she could even begin to struggle, the arms held tighter.
There was a hot whisper in her right ear, breath wafting down her neck. “If you don’t play along, it’s gonna mean big trouble for you, toots.”
She felt herself being rocked from side-to-side like he was an affectionate lover and not some malevolent stranger.
HII!!! SEVENTEEN COMEBACK OMGG!!! I was wondering if you could create a scenario for each member (it can be short!!) based on their individual teasers please!! IT WOULD BE SO COOL AND IT'S YOUR THEORIES THAT WE WOULD LIKE TO KNOW!! Thank youu!!!
“Even though you are being alone, remember we are on your side and don’t be afraid of all the fears you have.”
Jeonghan “Somebody said it means imperfection and danger.” - jeonghan draws an x on the present day of the month - 11 - another day has gone, and he’s still alone - jeonghan walks out into his balcony, and takes pictures of the outside view - he takes as many pictures as he can to remember - remember what? he’s not so sure himself….. - he keeps taking pictures, thinking that if he does, he might remember what he’s looking for - he looks into his lens and takes a picture, but when he takes a look at the stolen shot….. his eyes widen to see that it’s in color - jeonghan looks up and sees the world in black and white, but whenever he goes back to the picture, he sees blue skies, white houses, green trees - but most of all, he sees someone in that picture - jeonghan takes a picture of another stranger, but it appears in black and white unlike the other boy - he places his camera on the table and dashes out the door to chase after him - he leaves the door open, and hoshi, who came by to visit, walks inside only to find an empty house - he finds jeonghan’s camera on the coffee table and flips through the pictures, stopping at the one with color
Hoshi “The line for reaching to the beloved ones.” - the phone rings four times before hoshi picks it up - he says “hello?” into the phone, but no one answers - hoshi puts the phone down and takes a slip of paper out of his pocket - he doesn’t know who left it there, he doesn’t know who’s on the other side….. but maybe if he called, he’d know why this note was left for him - he dials the phone number 223-2111 - he brings the phone to his ear and waits for someone to pick up….. but no one does - he just can’t seem to reach whoever is on the other line
Jun “As the door opened, I was faced with the new destiny.” - “hey…. how are you? i don’t know why i called you but….. when we see each other again…. no, nevermind…. bye….” - junhui scans all the papers lying on the table before him - he picks one up, re-reading the same number that’s been written on each of the past letters - 1013 - he receives a new letter maybe once or twice a week, but each letter just increases the number of questions he has for the sender - but the question the sender keeps sending is “do you remember how long did we share for each other?” - after the fifteenth letter or so, junhui leaves the house to find the sender in apartment 1013 to receive an answer to the question - he walks into the building, reading the number on each door….. 1012….. 1014…. 1013 - he knocks on the door, and it swings open all by itself, possibly left ajar by the previous owner - junhui looks into the room….. but he finds no one inside to answer him
The8 “Do you remember how long did we share for each other?” - minghao sets the groceries bag on the table, picking up a little note sitting on the table - sadness washes over him when he realizes the meaning of the note - “do you remember how long did we share for each other?” - what’s the answer to that? - the groceries fall over and make a mess, but he refuses to clean it up - the magic eight ball he bought rolls over, revealing the answer to his question - 103 - he lies his head on the counter, and he stays in the same position for so long - even when he hears footsteps…… he refuses to look up
DK “In the place thirteen pieces can be completed.” - seokmin runs several laps around the neighborhood, pushing himself to do better than his previous time - there’s one problem though - no matter how fast he goes….. his time is always 37:33 - but he doesn’t give up; the next day, he tries again, this time pushing himself to go a little faster - when he gets to his destination, he checks the time on his stopwatch, eyes widening and stomach dropping to see 37:33 again - seokmin drops his stopwatch on the ground and blindly runs forward - he doesn’t need a reminder that he hasn’t improved - seungkwan, while on his way to the laundromat, finds a stopwatch on the ground and picks it up - when he sees the time blink 37:33, he presses reset
Seungkwan “A pioneer who cast himself into his destiny.” - seungkwan plays with the coins in his hand while waiting for his laundry - he’s watched people come and go without looking back - they all pick up their clothes at the end of their wash cycles; even the ones of those who came later than him have ended - but he just keeps waiting - his wash cycle seems endless, as if it’ll never end - at some point, he finds himself all alone as he waits and waits and waits - seungkwan eventually gives up on waiting, and leaves the laundromat, dropping change on top of one of the machines - and he, too, leaves without looking back - while walking, he passes by a young boy who enters the laundromat after him - chan picks up the coin with the number 5 on it, wondering if the boy he just passed was the one who left them there - behind him, the washing machine rings, signifying the end of a wash cycle
Dino “Do not be blinded by the illusion in front of you, but follow the truth inside of it.” - chan rolls the dice one more time, sighing when the sum adds up to 7 once more - he makes his piece walk seven spaces like the past hundred times - when he reaches the seventh space, he picks up his piece, revealing the words written underneath - “turn to the first space” - he goes back to the first space and rolls again and again, but it always goes back to 7 - he tries one last time…. but the results are exactly what he predicted - chan gets up and leaves the board game behind - what’s the point of playing if he can’t even advance? - joshua enter the house, finding the board game left incomplete on the floor - he sits down and rolls the dice just to see what number he would get - the first roll gives him 7….. making him go back to square one
Joshua “An everlasting being whichever way it goes.” - joshua turns on the faucet and lets the water run as he looks out the window - he looks down at the water pooling in the sink and stares at it, the number 131 never leaving his mind - he suddenly sees two figures standing side by side, but one decides to walk away from the other - seeing this, joshua puts his hands together and lets water pool in his hands before splashing it on his face - everyone walked away from him, and now he’s left all alone - after turning off the faucet and wiping his face, he walks around the house to try to get his mind off of it - but he soon discovers that water can’t wash away his worries
Mingyu “Another chapter of my life began since I met you.” - mingyu has two of everything - two lamps, two picture frames, two sofas, two apples, two clocks - but there’s only one him - he’s missing a part of himself, his other half, and he knows it - mingyu spends his days all by himself, waiting for something or someone to come along and complete him, but nothing ever happens - his runs his fingers over the black and white keys of his piano, and then he looks up at his clocks to check the time - one says 2:00, while the other says 2:01 - no matter how hard you try to synchronize clocks, one will always be behind - which is how he feels….. left behind - everything and everyone must have a double to complete them…. what about him? - he looks into his mirror and stares at his reflection, wondering if his reflection is the only double he would ever have - wonwoo, who has fallen asleep near a window, wonders if he’s one piece closer to helping mingyu complete himself
Wonwoo “Us in the different system, another form of Seventeen.” - wonwoo picks up the remote lying on the bed and points it at the tv - he turns it on, and immediately the voices of the news reporters echo throughout his room - he watches for a few seconds, when static suddenly envelopes the screen - he changes the channel, but static interrupts the show once more - the numbers floating on the top left of the screen read 10001 - wonwoo goes from one channel to the other, looking for at least one channel without interruption - only when he finds what he’s looking for will things be clear again - the static stops at channel 10, which shows the view of a field aligned with bushes and windmills - at the very bottom, a figure comes into view, walking around aimlessly - but most importantly, there’s no static
Vernon “One less than a full revolution.” - hansol walks around a field filled with windmills and bushes, unsure of where this path will lead him - he’s been walking for what seems like hours - he’s lost his way somehow, and the compass he’s carrying might have something to do with it - rather than a full 360, it stops at 359 - hansol stops walking and looks down, accepting the fact that he’s lost and all alone - that’s when he sees a shadow appear, and when he looks up, he sees jihoon - relief washes over him as he realizes he must not be too far from town - hansol looks down at the compass in his hand before throwing it as his friend - “do you know why my compass is missing one?”
Woozi “All of the questions in the world can be answered in one definitive answer.” - jihoon flips through the last book in his library in frustration - the compass hansol gave him…… why couldn’t he find the reason why it stopped at 359 instead of 360? - why was it one less than a full revolution? - jihoon crumples up the paper he was writing on, each calculation giving him the same answer - 4643 - he goes through his books again, coming up with all sorts of equations and theories - he runs out of paper eventually, and so he takes a marker and continues by writing on the window of his library - the same number appears at the end of his equation - jihoon underlines the number twice; if it keeps popping up, there must be a meaning behind it - he hears the door slowly open behind him, and he slowly turns around to see seungcheol at the door - maybe he’d have an answer
S.Coups “I was afraid and anxious since I was all alone.” - seungcheol closes the door behind him, the prime number jihoon gave him on his mind - he takes a pen out of his pocket to write it on his hand so that he wouldn’t forget - seungcheol starts walking around aimlessly, looking around the city in hopes of finding what it could mean - but he soon realizes that all he’s been doing is walking around in circles because he’s passed the same sign with the number 17 on it too many times to count - so he keeps walking, he doesn’t give up - he walks and walks until he finds himself in a desert….. and he’s all alone….. or so he thought - he hears footsteps behind him, and when he turns around, he sees someone in the distance - jeonghan smiles at the sight of him - he found who he was looking for because slowly…. the world is turning colorful - they both look up at the sky, and what was once black and white….. is now a blend of rosequartz and serenity - jihoon said that all the questions in the world can be answered in one definitive answer - seungcheol looks into his hand one last time and sees the number 4643 - like the signs he’s been passing all this time….. - 4 + 6 + 4 + 3 - the answer is 17
“Nevertheless, we met on thirteen different paths and eventually a complete bond has formed leading us to our brightest moment.”
Seungkwan said that this comeback is like debuting again. Before debuting, they had to find each other. The trailers depict them searching for each other to come together as one.
I think the order is Jeonghan, Hoshi, Jun, The8, DK, Seungkwan, Dino, Joshua, Mingyu, Wonwoo, Vernon, Woozi, and S.Coups.
Why? The scenes at the end of each trailer is in black and white except for Seungcheol’s. I think that it means their worlds were in black and white, but finding each other and forming Seventeen is what brought color to their worlds again. Seungcheol, the leader, was the last piece to complete the puzzle—the last piece to bring everyone together and make the trailers go full circle.
They thought they were alone, but they never really were.
this isn’t my best work i’m so sorry!! the comeback is so close, so i felt stressed that i had to finish it early!! i feel like i didn’t clearly express my theory on this comeback and i feel like it’s so vague…. please forgive me ;A;