though looking at how much work you put into your characters

The Seventh Wheel: A Case for Black Lion Lance

Alternatively titled: Lance Deserves The World Because He is My Son and I Love Him

Okay, so Shiro’s gone and someone’s gotta fill his big ass shoes. In the toss-up between him, Allura, and Keith, I’m going to be arguing in this post that Lance could be the guy to do it. And, fair warning, this is going to be ridiculously (like, ridiculously) long lmao so here’s the TL;DR right now: I think that a) Lance already shows the character traits of a good leader, and b) there’s a good chance of him becoming one, given his impending character arc. 

It also has a chance of not happening, of course, but who cares?? I already started writing this thing, so:

Alright, let’s begin at the beginning, because that’s always a good place to start.

Lance is first introduced to the audience as the classic loud, arrogant, goofy flirt. The perfect comic relief character. He rescues a guy because his “rival” was gonna do it first and he can’t have that, the first thing he does in the giant robot cat is fart, and he hits on a girl who just fell out of a pod in a magic castle. He’s there to make you laugh.

I can’t imagine anyone looking at a character like that and “You know what? This guy could be a leader.” Allura says it herself in episode 1. The black lion is supposed to be the decisive head of Voltron, a person who’s a natural born leader, who’s in control, and,

Basically, calm, collected, and respected. “A natural born leader.” So, definitely not Lance. Case closed.

But, not really. Because Lance actually is calm and collected. He’s just not respected. He has all the leadership traits– the problem is that he’s not treated as someone who could be a leader.

Keep reading

Here’s the full transcript of Mark talking Darkiplier in the livestream

(Time approx. 3 hours, 52 minutes to 4 hours, 4 minutes into the stream. And, yes, this took forever). Thought you’d like this, maybe.

I’ve bolded stuff I find especially interesting.

~~~~~~~

Mark: Long ago, a long time ago, I liked to do these scary edits because I just felt like doing scary edits and this is how Darkiplier got born. And then what happened was over time Darkiplier became less and less about the scary figure and more about this romantic figure, and it always rubbed me the wrong way. And I kind of shied away from Darkiplier for a while. And I really really really- if I was going to bring Darkiplier, and when we thought about this, we thought, okay there should be a Darkiplier route. And that was there from the beginning, and so when I wanted to do it I wanted to do it my way, and I wanted to do it right, and I wanted to have this unending level of creepiness. And at the same time, I didn’t want to step on the toes of Antisepticeye because I know there’s a big fan base of that, and I didn’t want to get in the way of that at all and I really don’t care that there’s more than one dark personalities of people. But when I saw the opportunity to have this character here, I spent like 8 hours editing this, like just meticulously every single RBG. This is a layer, we green screened this one, I color corrected it, I separated the RBG layers I added the shakes and glitchiness every frame. I worked on the voice, too. The voice took me the longest to figure out. Like the shakes! And my computer was dying this whole time cause I put my effects on here.

Tyler: The amount of time you had to spend rendering this.

Mark: And so, the audio’s actually three separate layers. It would have been two, but Kathryn helped me out on that one to make it more clear. It’s a normal pitched layer that’s edited, echoed, reverbed, mastered, and convoluted which means it’s just thrown off to the left and right, and then it’s a deep layer of that. But then to make it really come together- it didn’t live without this center channel that wasn’t convoluted but was centered. But getting that voice right was so pinnacle, so paramount to what I wanted to come out of this. And we did like thirty minutes of shooting various versions of me talking to the camera and I wanted to pick the exact dialogue that really kind of gave away my idea of what Dark is in not a terribly obvious way.

Tyler: The other thing, this was supposed to all be one video.

Mark: But YouTube annotations, this new version doesn’t allow you to link the same video multiple times, so these are literally the old videos that I first did when Darkiplier first came about, like, these are the ones, especially this one here, and then this is my cheap knockoff Darkiplier.

Amy: Canon Darkiplier.

Mark: Canon Darkiplier. And I’m going to readily admit something. I joked about Darkiplier because it didn’t seem like something people wanted to take seriously, and I’m okay with that on certain aspects but it had diverged into multiple different facets and multiple different personalities, and everyone had their own version of Darkiplier, and I thought it was hilarious that, “Hey, here’s my version of Darkiplier, and he’s an idiot.” Like, he’s just this weird emo kid. And then I stepped back from that, like, I stepped back. And you can even- in that time, when I was doing those videos, in this era, I was not very happy. I was kind of… I was pessimistic about a lot of things. And I felt like that bled through in a lot of things I did. And that’s why even October of last year I literally made Darkiplier an emo character. And then when we were getting to this, I thought about it like very carefully and I thought back to why I did it originally, and I did it originally because, well, Darkiplier wasn’t even a thing. Darkiplier was not a thing when I was making those videos. I just wanted to make some creepy stuff. And then I thought about that, and I was like if I want to make a statement about who this is, I need to own that and I need to put something out there that is not ambiguous, because I realize that’s where I went wrong. I didn’t have a solid character so obviously, people would come up with their own versions, they would fill in the gaps where they saw fit. So, when I made this I had to embrace it fully and fine-tune it down to exactly where I wanted. When you choose the “fake” choice carrying through to this one, I really wanted that to come through, except at the end to this video, where it gets silly, but that’s because the real me comes in and the real me’s an idiot. And I’ve actually watched this over and over again because I’m listening to the takes I put in here and I’m listening to my inflection and my tone, my demeanor and I’m imagining like how to refine it better next time when I bring him back, like how to do it better.

Tyler: I remember now, I set up the table.

Mark: Yeah, you did. You set up the table we had to change it out for clear glasses because the green screen was reflecting through. But yeah, even this, like the intersplices of anger, and this is me getting real deep in the meta of Darkiplier, like if that’s even a thing that can be- let me just pause it here. I don’t read too much into this but if there’s something that I want to take seriously, I want to actually do right. So, in my mind, Darkiplier is an entirely different person from me. But, much like Warfstache, doesn’t obey the laws of physics. He exists in another world entirely and bleeds through into this one. This is sounding really nerdy of me.

Tyler: I remember the Warfstache talk.

Mark: So Completely unironically, Darkiplier is a completely separate entity from who I am. But, he admires what I’ve accomplished, and he’s very much… people picked up on this, and people thought it was really creepy, because it’s what I wanted. He’s a social manipulator. He is literally, 100% manipulative. He leads you into this false sense of security, and he wants you to trust him because he wants to take advantage of you. That is literally what I wanted for Darkiplier. And how creepy and scary that actually is from the surface. Especially in this first bit, where he says, “If dinner is what you want, then I can provide.” And I wanted this to come across in a seductive way while also masking, like, this burning rage inside that breaks through the suave nature of it. That was my clue to reveal he’s not your friend. He’s not here to help you. He’s here to use you. And that also came across when I was thinking about, like, the effects. Like, his image shatters, he separates because he’s not entirely kept together, you know what I mean? So, I wanted like the drastic impacts of the rage pulling back suddenly to the calm nature and the demeanor and this last one, I was thinking was especially telling. It’s not me trying to break through, it’s his shell cracking.

Kathryn: I love that.

Mark: Yeah? It’s my favorite of all of them.

Kathryn: That’s one’s my favorite. I have legitimately just gone and watched that bit.

Mark: Yeah?

Kathryn: It’s really good.

Mark: Oh, thank you.

Kathryn: I really like that.

Mark: Yeah. And number 1 the visuals work hard on this one, but nailing the audio- that high-pitched ringing that a lot of people were like wow that really hurts my ears, that was by design. That was supposed to hurt because listening to him- a lot if inspiration for him comes from G-man from Half-life 2 and 1, like this weird interdimensional person that seems human but is obviously not and doesn’t obey the laws of physics, and is just like this shell of a person that’s in a suit. Not a suit, literally a human suit, and is trying to figure out how to puppet it right that you believe him, but he’s really good at it. And that’s where the scariness of Darkiplier, I think, really comes from, is because he seems like someone you can trust, and he will manipulate you, and take advantage of you, and literally use you, and to me that’s terrifying. Like that’s the antithesis of what I want to be and so if I’m going to make an opposite version of me, he’s gonna be the fucking worst. Like worse than any romantic story can ever bring about. He’s fucking awful.

Amy: It was convenient, though, I like the way it goes from Relax to this, like the video “Relax,” because then people were not expecting this. But it’s so nice to have it on Valentine’s Day. It works so well.

Mark: And then came the bullshit transition that we had to do. So, this is comical in a way.

Amy: It doesn’t drag it though.

Mark: Yeah it doesn’t drag. You get the scary. Tyler’s here-

Tyler: In Mark’s suit, which I have fit in, but not the pants.

Mark: He didn’t fit, we forgot to get a tie, like, we printed out a mask, and I looked at this and was like I could try to make this creepy, and then I went, I objectively can’t. Let me throw in some punch sound effects.

Tyler: I have to make sure, cause-

Mark: He couldn’t see shoot.

Tyler: No, I couldn’t, and I had to keep moving the mask cause there was one time we did this that the mask ended up completely on the side of my head and I was just like, hey Mark, you can’t touch my face.

Amy: The convenient thing about this, though, with all the glitches is that you can hide stuff with it.

Tyler: Yeah, and there’s a reason I never let go of Mark I have no clue where anything is.

Mark: Yeah, oh man. Oh, this, oh my god. Oh, and secret Easter egg- you know who Dark is because he doesn’t have a shadow. Totally intentional and by design.

Amy: His toes are missing too, but.

Mark: Shh he doesn’t have toes he’s so scary.

~~~~~~

.

So I finally went through omgeverythingplease and here are things that I didn’t know
  • Bitty is OBSESSED with food. OBSESSED.
  • Boy has a *problem*
  • Like I know we like to headcanon that Bitty goes into some sort of media, but he’s more likely to become a food critic. Basically he’s more into the “baking” part of “baking vlog” than the “vlog” part.
  • Holster is a grumpy messy bitch.
  • For real, the team seriously debated who was grumpier: Jack or Holster
  • (for like, a hot second, before the answer became obvious)
  • (It’s Jack. Jack is the grumpiest)
  • Ransom and Bitty are very close friends. Close enough that Bitty chirps Holster that he’s being replaced via tweet.
  • Ransom and Bitty get PSLs from “ ‘Bucks”.
  • That is a quote. Eric Richard Bittle has called Starbucks, ‘Bucks.
  • (I bet he calls Target, Tar-zhay too)
  • This one was a bit more analytical: we found out about Jack coaching peewee via Bitty’s twitter
  • Bitty is the one who tells us that the Jack says the kids call him “Coach Z”
  • Because Bitty is the one who typed out the tweet, if the kids called Jack “Coach Zed”, he would have spelled out “Zed.”
  • Therefore we can assume that the kids called Jack “Coach Zee” and not “Coach Zed”
  • However this revelation by Jack was immediately followed by a debate over Zee vs. Zed. So who really knows?
  • I still don’t know how either of them pronounces “pecan”
  • More after the cut because this is getting long

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi, 7goodangel. I am here to ask you about PaperJam as a shy, smol and innocent being (mainly thegreatrouge made him be). There has been some conflicts regarding his trait. Some said his canonical personality is a jerk, like what you wrote in his bio / info and some said that is severely wrong and being shy, (which made him shipped with Fresh), is his canonical personality. What are your thoughts about this? I mean, it is your character and people are taking control of it. Don't you disagree?

Well… I have talked to people and seen public conversations and this has happened several times to me over months. I guess I’ve gotten a little numb to it now… or maybe it’s due to school that I haven’t given it the attention that it deserves. Probably due to school. 

I just can’t update constantly like others - even though some others in school were and are able to update constantly. I can’t keep going around and holding up my bio of PJ and police people. It’s exhausting to me… it really takes up the small bit of free time I have. 

I think after I get a solid job that I’ll be able to go around better… but anyway - back to your question. 


While I love seeing interpretations and do not want people to be limited by something and have their imaginations go forth… it’s proving that a huge con comes with that mentality - which you have pointed out. A lot of people swear that PJ is the cute, innocent interpretation that really, did get PJ popular in the first place. While I did have him as a jerk from the beginning - I kinda kept that info to my RP blog - so you could say it is my fault this is all happening and I do think that. I could of done something to make it not as bad as it is now… 

It’s just like the NSFW stuff… people just assume the first thing and run with it. And it really does make me feel like I really am not needed for my own character at points. 

It’s a struggle - I don’t want to have people stop interpreting PJ within AUs… but I also don’t want people to just see him as an innocent child to ship with Fresh. 

And I’m still trying to find the best solution to it. 

But… I feel like the damage is already done. It’s too late for me to talk to all of these people going around swearing on their life that PJ is canoncally like Rouge’s interpretation/AUs. It feels like an hopeless battle to me. 

And I guess I needed someone to ask me this question so then I can fully say my thoughts on this. 

So in short, while I love creativity and don’t want to snuff it out (considering some people would probably think I’m doing that already with saying “No Sin”), I still don’t like it. It irritates me, irks me, frustrates me, and I feel like even as the person who thought of PJ in the first place, my voice isn’t enough. Communities seem like they don’t care about artists unless they reach a ‘certain goal of popularity’ or seem like they have a more professional style of art. I know I do not reach either of those titles. 

People misspell my username all the time - I actually claimed ‘7goodangle’ on tumblr for that reason.

People still say “I’m too lazy to find who made PJ” when they clearly mentioned they looked at the bio on the wiki. 

People still go around arguing others on the canon ship of OmniPJ and swearing that FreshPaper is the true canon ship, when all people are pointing out is that they need to keep the canon ship in mind when going around with information.

Even just basic personality traits… and these things are happening on sites that I do not nor want an account for. 

I still want others to have fun - to be happy; but I don’t know… I guess I’m cutting out my own happiness to get everyone else happy? I want to eventually write a version of PJ within his own universe and story… and he is more like the version I created within the UT verse. Not exact - but close. Though who knows… I might shove PJ to the side and replace his role with another character. I’m still weighing options.

Cause PJ was the first character I ever put this much time and thought into… my first character that was balanced, well rounded…

And what happens?

…well.

You said it Anon. 

They took it - changed it (initially as an AU but now people think it’s canon) - and I can’t do much about it. Due to school and not much free-time… due to how many don’t know the true creator… and just back talking anyone who is just mentioning it to people who swear by it. 

As an artist and a character designer…

It makes me not want to show designs, characters, and stories ever again online.

Considering if this is how I was treated on the first one… why even take a chance at a second one? If it has brought me so much stress, frustration, and time… why even try it again?

I said I was only going to do fanart so if anyone stole it, it didn’t really matter. 
I think I should have stuck with that thought process. 

In conclusion, there are some major things to take away here. First – that yes, I do not like how it has skewed this far to the point of arguing over a fandom version with the canon. Canon is canon and I get the different AUs – this is too far. Way too far. I am emotionally drained from this – from this whole mess that I have been defending throughout majority of PJ’s lifespan. I will state this – Paper Jam is my character. He is my original character that I created more than a year ago. And the UT AU fandom took my character and warped him to something he is not and all of his original meaning is lost. I do not like to hurt others or make other sad – but I must put my foot fully down. This miscommunication needs to stop. I am tired of repeating things over and over and I have past my breaking point time and time again. I just want people to see PJ how he really is… and I wish that people could be focusing more on the reality of him instead of the alternate that they all claim as truth.

Final words: I still like Undertale – I still like creating characters and having fun – but the Undertale AU fandom is ridiculous now. The Amino UT community is insanity in an app, and there is a lot of stuff that has made many artists and creators to their breaking point and leaving the fandom entirely. Everyone in this fandom needs to take ten steps back and look at what they are doing. Go back to the game. Play it again – watch your favorite let’s player’s videos of it again. 

And just… food for thought… please don’t jump the gun on someone else’s OC’s personality and actions. 

I do not want anyone to experience what I had.

Sexting (Jimin smut)

Originally posted by minblush


Summary: On a lonely night, you decide to sign up for an anonymous sexting site. Of course you are matched with the notorious fuckboy you’re constantly trying to avoid. Park fucking Jimin.

Themes: Sexting, Fuckboy Jimin, College AU.

Pairing: You x Jimin

Word Count: 4k

This fic contains: Explicit and graphic depictions of smut, sex over the phone, swearing. 


ENTER USERNAME:

Cleopatra123

WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?

Male/Female

WHERE ARE YOU FROM?

I’d rather not say/enter here:

WHAT ARE YOU INTERESTED IN?

Decent conversation/making friends/finding a language buddy/other

PLEASE INDICATE YOUR AGE PREFERANCE:

19-24

CLICK ‘CHAT’ TO BE MATCHED WITH A PARTNER!

YOU HAVE BEEN MATCHED WITH ‘THOR562’.

THOR562: 21 years old- Seoul, South Korea- also interested in ‘other’.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO CHAT?

Yes/No

YOU ARE NOW IN A CHAT WITH THOR562, ENJOY!


Keep reading

Venus Aspects

Venus is my best friend so here we go…

Sun - Venus Aspects
(I’ve done these ones before, but I want to include it again in this Venus aspect master post)

In a person’s chart, the Sun and Venus are never further than 48 degrees apart; the only possible aspects it can have are a conjunction, semi-sextile, or a semi-square.

Sun conjunct Venus
This creates a strong connection to Venus’ energy and carries over Venusian traits. These people are in tune with the beauty of life. They are charming and easy-going. They are very romantic, but they too often get tied up into the thought that a prince or princess will come for them rather than they find a lover themselves. With that being said though, they do possess a magnetic attraction and a lot of people will fall for their charms. This aspect softens the masculinity parts of you into feminine and gentle pursuit.  

Sun semi-sextile Venus
When the Sun and Venus are 30 degrees apart (2 degree orb) it creates a semi-sextile. A weaker aspect, but still have some influence on the individual. These people are cheerful, good humoured, and optimistic. Semi-sextile is a 12th harmonic aspect, so with that vibe you can imagine that the influence this aspect creates will almost go unnoticed. 

Sun semi-square Venus
When the Sun and Venus are 45 degrees apart (4 degree orb, but the closer, the stronger) it creates the semi-square. This is another weaker aspect, but it does create a strong pursuit for talent in music and dance. These people also seem to be strongly inclined to female offspring. These people are sensitive and somewhat shy (still keeping in mind that this is a minor aspect so major aspects elsewhere in the chart can say something else). Since this is technically a discordant aspect, the shyness is rooted from insecurity. Semi-squares being an 8th harmonic will give off some Scorpio/8th House vibes to this person’s romantic character. 

Mercury - Venus Aspects
When I think of Mercury-Venus aspects, I picture a poet writing, dancing his pencil across the paper.
Again, Mercury and Venus can only be so far apart, that is, never more than 76 degrees apart. So with that being said, the possible aspects that can be made are the conjunction, semi-sextile, semi-square, sextile, quintile, decile, and semi-decile. I will exclude quintiles, deciles, and semi-deciles, but you can sort of get an idea on how to interpret a Mercury-Venus decile/semi-decile by acknowledging a decile/semidecile’s Capricorn/Saturn/10th House energy. And for hints on how to interpret a quintile/biquintile, I talk about this aspect here

Mercury conjunct Venus
The mind is very refined and artistic. Soft and charming. Ideas and voice can be almost hypnotizing. Very friendly when unafflicted. Speaks beauty so effortlessly. According to C.E.O. Carter, people with this aspect are typically fond of youth and may even act juvenile… This could create a wide range of motives to why someone might act this way; to attract young people or to just stay “hip.” This is very true when Saturn isn’t very pronounced in the chart. You can imagine people with this aspect being quite proficient in writing, music, or speaking, especially when this aspect is in the 3rd or 5th house. 

Mercury sextile Venus
Great placement for musicians; it combines the mind with artistic abilities. Very artistic. Friendly, charming, and social, may come off a little fake though (unless of course, the rest of the chart says otherwise). Like all harmonious Venus-Mercury aspects, you have a way with words; a great conversationalist. 

Mercury semi-sextile Venus
Very minor aspect so again, it may go unnoticed, but because it is harmonious, it still has its intellect and charm to it. Like the sextile, the individual can be a good speaker. I would consider this another good placement for musicians just because semi-sextiles are 12th harmonics so therefore there could be some Neptune vibes drawing in there. Artistic ability is definitely there, but will need to seek it out even harder than the sextile. 

Mercury semi-square Venus
The 8th harmonic sprouting from a semi-square could potentially make the individual possessive, perceptive, seductive, and manipulative. An alluring charm to the way they communicate to others. Can sometimes be negative for relationships if the controlling aspects to this placement are indeed prominent. 

Moon - Venus Aspects

Moon conjunct Venus
If prominent in the native chart, they have a calm and gentle presence. There is a strong appreciation for love, beauty, and art. Generally all around affectionate, charming, and trusting. This sensitivity might make the person prone to people using them because they are sort of a “Yes-man” type person. Strong motherly character to them. A very good placement for people who wish to have children as it symbolizes harmonious family life. 

Moon sextile or trine Venus
Quite similar to the conjunction in the sense that they are very artistic. Blessed with charm and attractiveness. Financially a good placement as well, money is hardly an issue unless badly afflicted somewhere else in the chart. The trine comes more naturally than the sextile.

Moon square Venus
Difficult and afflicted position for Venus. The individual feels a sense of melancholy around the idea of love and beauty, there may be some insecurities around that as well. Unless Venus shares a stronger, more positive aspect some where else in the person’s chart, this is not a very good aspect for money. There are strong insecurities to bring the effeminate side of the person out, they hide it through aggressiveness and toughness. To overcome this hard aspect, the person needs to accept genuine love where it is given, do not shut it out. Financially, the individual should look to earthy aspects in their chart to handle money better and for stability. Work on being more loving unconditionally.

Moon opposite Venus
This aspect is not as difficult to handle as the square, but there is work involved. There are fears of being unloved and difficulties with handling finances. Again, accept genuine love where it is given and give love where it is deserved. I feel this aspect can also be overcome by a strong relationship between them and their lover or them and the mother. Disconnection of the mother through this aspect tends to have very negative affects on the individual. 

Venus - Mars Aspects

Venus conjunct Mars
While conjunctions are commonly seen as harmonious, they are actually in fact neutral and in this case, the powerful combination of Venus and Mars can actually be quite difficult. Depending on where Venus and Mars are positioned will depict just how this aspect will act (the Venus side of this aspect may smother Mars if Venus is in an empowering sign and vice versa). An overpowering Venus will weaken Mars’ abilities therefore the individual could lack qualities Mars typically provides (such as, drive towards passions…). The overpowering Venus will favour fairness, love, and harmony, but will also be lazy, superficial, etc. On the other spectrum, we have an overpowering Mars which could make the individual lack Venus’ gentle and loving traits. Lust and power could be a big thing for Mars placed here. Can make the individual moody and reckless, but brave. Both extremes can be balanced by focusing on the one that is being weakened. 

Venus sextile or trine Mars
Harmony between the spirit and animal self. Makes a strong, enthusiastic, courageous character. Very good placement for health, makes for a generally robust and healthy body. Great love of life and they tend to just effortlessly tread through life like a warrior. Affectionate and kind. Makes the individual magnetically attractive to the opposite sex. Mars will put any sort of Venus related talents to work and may prefer Venus related activities, but can also do well in athletic fields as well. 

Venus square Mars
Quite a difficult aspect that needs taming and it can manifest in different ways. From what some astrologers have observed, this aspect can create conflict with family life; this could range anywhere from quarrels or unfortunate family events. It does not doom romantic relationships, but it does stir up drama. Romantic life has quite a bit of flare; passion, heartbreak, tears, kiss-and-makeup sort of situations… It’s very extra. Creates a jealous and possessive character and should try to work on eliminating this trait. In masculine individuals, it can make them harsh, unloving, or unruly; this must be tamed in order to find a healthy, happy, permanent mate. Careful who you marry or dedicate your life to; avoid marrying young or marry wisely. Sex drive is either too much or very little with this aspect. Usually impatient and many unfulfilled desires. Look to what houses are involved with this aspect because what this aspect comes down to is conflict between passion and harmony to whichever houses are involved. Harmonious aspects to Saturn can calm this position down. Aside from the negativity this aspect gives off, it can create an extremely passionate and driven character.

Venus opposite Mars
Oppositions represent outer forces creating conflict. This aspect has many of the same difficulties and tendencies as the square, but it is much easier to escape its framework with conscious movements away from its negative energy. People who are more feminine ruled will develop overly sensitive traits and attract men who are aggressive and licentious. People who are masculine ruled likely have aggressive and touchy traits and attract overly sensitive and submissive women into their lives. Either way, both characters come on too strong. This aspect also represents conflict with the opposite sex; that can be manifested in many ways like oppression, difficult parents, etc. Just like the square, it can create a very passionate and driven character.

Venus - Jupiter Aspects

Venus conjunct Jupiter
Considered the “lucky” aspect as Venus and Jupiter endlessly compliment each other, but there can be too much cheese and wine if you know what I mean (indulgence… Laziness… Self-centredness… Impulsive…). But yes, this is considered one of the best aspects a natal chart can have as it represents a very artistically developed character with great appreciation for beauty and absolute gracefulness. Popularity and prosperity also come from this aspect. Jupiter expands all that Venus has to offer, Jupiter gives Venus a huge heart to just love all of life’s virtues. 

Venus sextile or trine Jupiter
Many of the same benefits as the conjunctions, less of the negative traits as they are more controlled with these aspects. The sextile needs to actually be put to work to achieve the benefits whereas the trine makes them come naturally to the individual. There is also a strong interest in religion and attunement to the Higher Self. 

Venus square Jupiter
What’s great about Jupiter aspects is that the negative aspects often get same benefits as the positive aspects (trine, conjunction, sextile, etc.); it is the case for Venus squaring Jupiter, but on top of that, there are some negatives that need to be controlled and overcome. Typically problems routed from this aspect are over-indulgence, bad judgement, vanity, laziness, and doing things without purpose; the individual usually overdoes it or doesn’t do enough. May be foolish with money; if this is controlled, the individual can be quite prosperous though. Individuals with this placement should be wary of the consumption of alcohol and fatty, rich foods as the liver is sensitive with this aspect.

Venus opposite Jupiter
Again, like I mentioned in the square, negative Jupiter aspects can still possess the same benefits as the trine or sextile. It does also possess the same troubles as the square, but often times the problems come from outer forces and aren’t caused by the individual themselves. Often times the issues, whether they be financial, or romantic, or etc. issues, can come from foreigners, travelling, or just justice. It’s best to also see what houses are involved with this aspect to get a better idea where the excess and trouble comes from. 

Venus - Saturn Aspects

Venus conjunct Saturn
In this case, the intense energy coming from the conjunction can be a bit discordant; here we have love being smothered by Saturn’s restriction. So yes, there is a lack of lovingness from this aspect, but it is because Saturn is making Venus cautious in love and considerate of their own feelings. Saturn will restrict the use of money as well; an individual with this aspect can be quite stingy, even possibly to the point of being a Ebenezer Scrooge. It is, however, perfectly okay to be careful with finances, but it is the selfishness that could create a problem; it will attract equally selfish people. Insecurity is another issue with this aspect as it restricts Venus’ ability to appreciate one’s own beauty. An individual with this aspect may not even see what is described above as an issue to them; they may think that ultimately, their duty to serve on in this life is more important than beauty, love, etc. If however, what is described sounds troubling to a Venus conjunct Saturn individual, the best way to overcome these issues is sacrifice. There is no love without sacrifice, especially in the case of Venus conjunct Saturn, but the sacrifice itself could very well be a very small price to pay.

Venus sextile or trine Saturn
Creates a character of absolute loyalty and dependability. Takes love very seriously and will not waste time with careless people; they value commitment. Is patient with love; one of the most important factors in love is to know that love is patient, therefore you must be patient with love. It is quite possible that insecurity is also routed from this aspect, but it really depends on the houses and signs that are involved (A detrimental Venus in aspect to the first house definitely screams insecurity). Like the conjunction, the individual can be quite careful with finances, but not to the point of being stingy. A great amount of spiritual strength and survival skills is developed with this aspect from either past-life hardships or early-life hardships. 

Venus square Saturn
This aspect is what many astrologers consider karmic debt. Saturn freezes Venus when the aspect is tight on this one. It reaps disappointment through love. Loneliness is inflicted on themselves. An individual with this placement may cut themselves off from opportunities in love to avoid disappointment (or may feel they don’t deserve love) or may make foolish decisions in love which can cause obvious disappointment. The first case would be especially true if this aspect is connected to the fourth house or even the first house. The second case would be true if this aspect is connected to one of the houses involving relationships (like the seventh house). Venus - Saturn aspects also hint to greed which may be true with the square. Ultimately this aspect if trying to teach the individual to have some balance; knowing what you truly deserve and don’t deserve; to give love to receive love; to share to be shared. Like the conjunction, a person with this aspect may feel like they don’t need love because they devote that energy towards their ambition or duty… They sacrifice comfort… 

Venus opposite Saturn
Some of the same negative encounters with this aspect as the square, but the problems arise mostly through outer forces like the people they meet; the outer forces are reflecting past-life behaviours. The houses involved with this aspect can tell a lot about where the problems will arise (seventh house could symbolize a difficult relationship or the tenth/fourth house could symbolize a parent, usually the father, that is a burden, distant, unloving or cold; quite possibly also the need to assimilate for the parent, the need, but often resulting in inability, to impress them. Saturn in the second house opposite to Venus may symbolize financial conflict… Saturn in the eighth house opposite Venus may symbolize conflict with inheritance..). The possible conflict with this aspect is vast and needs to be inspected carefully to really know exactly what it may represent in an individual’s chart, but to put it simply, Saturn is inflicting dread and misfortune on Venus and it is often due to the individual’s choice in environment. The effects of this aspect are easily avoidable by consciousness and choice; you can choose to be happy, you can choose what people or things effect you. 

Venus - Uranus Aspects

Venus conjunct Uranus
Eccentricity draws people to this individual; it is creative, dynamic, unique, and ultimately attractive to others. Unless earth or Saturn gives some commitment and stability in the individual’s chart, this placement can make a person hard to tie down and dislikes responsibility. They never really know what they like or admire because it’s always changing! There can definitely be “a sudden change in heart” with this placement for the individual. Funny enough, if they aren’t the one to break things off, they’re often extremely upset by separation. Great independence; the individual’s freedom comes before love, especially true if there is a lack of water or earth in the chart. The trick to tying one down with this aspect is to be a valuable friend before a lover as one of their morals is usually something like “Lovers come and go, but friends remain forever.” Being able to speak on a friend level gives a person with this aspect room to breathe. Artistic talent is strong with this placement as Venus combines her eye for beauty with Uranus’ unique ideas to create an artistic genius. 

Venus trine or sextile Uranus
These individuals could easily be described as fascinating. Has the same magnetism and artistic genius as the conjunction. In every thing that Venus entails, Uranus is going to put some surprise twists in there; brings love, prosperity, and events from unexpected places. The sudden events and changes will always be in favour of the individual. The trine aspect brings all of these traits more easily than the sextile

Venus square or opposite Uranus
An individual with this aspect may need to seek stability in himself before seeking a successful and stable romantic relationship for emotional instability is common with this aspect. Fickle behaviour is common. Magnetism is just as strong as the trine aspect, but it may attract the wrong type of person for this individual. Has unconventional ideas around love and sex, but this aspect won’t cause promiscuousness. Strong will to be independent to the point where the individual may forget just how much he/she relies on certain people. Demands freedom, but also needs to realize that they must give freedom to others to be, well, ultimately free. 

Venus - Neptune Aspects

Venus conjunct Neptune
This has got to be the most favourable aspect among artists and musicians as it blesses a chart with immense inspiration, imagination, and romantic traits. Attractive and angelic. May be psychically sensitive. Interest in mystical or metaphysical fields can also be strong; anything of divinity. This interest in the unknown can also result in a negative direction such as escapism, but a more developed individual with this aspect will know that the path to enlightenment includes a raw and sober mind. Romantically compassionate, usually has a great understanding of the laws of love and has a lot of love to give. Nerves are sensitive in love. An individual with this placement may romanticize toxic behaviours, people, ideology, etc. 

Venus trine or sextile Neptune
Like the conjunction, this is an extremely favourable aspect for artistic and musicians as it denotes great imagination, inspiration, and talent. An individual with this aspect will have a great eye for beauty and some level of refinement. Great understanding of love and values love on a spiritual level. Compassionate and is the type of person to “always be there for you.” Not super attached to the material world and just like the conjunction, there is interest in the metaphysical fields; may be psychically sensitive, if not, intuition is definitely still strong. Sensitive type. 

Venus square Neptune
Neptune is creating self-deception in Venusian realms and whichever houses that are involved is where it will often take place. The most common self-deception created from this aspect is in the area of love; individuals with this aspect often create an image of how a person is when they’re clearly not like that at all; they try to fit their partner into a framework that isn’t them; a square block into a circular hole. This ultimately will bring the individual some disappointment in love when they finally realize they cannot change a person no matter how much they wish upon it. So while commonly it is that the expectations are too high in love, they can also be too low; the individual needs to find a balance in order to be happy. There is also a strong desire to seek true enlightenment and the divine, but is often unable to fully achieve this desire. The square does not affect artist ability in a negative way like some may associate with a negative Venus/Neptune aspect, in fact, it could create a positive influence on the individual’s artistic ability as squares often provide motivation and drive.

Venus opposite Neptune
I mentioned in the square description that there is self-deception, but in the case of the opposition, there is deception coming from outer forces, most often people and even more specific, romantic affairs. A person with this aspect is likely to encounter someone like described in the square, but with selfish and controlling motives also. The easiest way to opt out of this experience is to simply just avoid these people; you don’t need to sacrifice your interests to fit someone else’s needs. Be wise with who you allow into your life romantically. This aspect can also manifest in other ways, not just romantic ones, but also be aware of possible deception and schemes through other Venusian realms such as money and beauty. Again, just like the square, artistic ability is not negatively affected by this aspect.

Venus - Pluto Aspects

Venus conjunct Pluto
There is a great deal of lust, magnetism, and sensuality with this aspect. This aspect has the potential of making a person a master at seduction. What’s also great about this aspect is that Pluto, a planet that sees right through all there is in its rawest form, will break some of Venus’ superficialness and social barriers that Venus often entails. Romantic endeavours are far from lacking steaminess thanks to Pluto. Your artistic projects will usually have an intimate connection to you. 

Venus trine or sextile Pluto
There isn’t the same amount of magnetism as the conjunction, but the people who do get caught by your allure REALLY get pulled in by you. Romantic feelings are intense and leave great emotional impact. Great value for intimacy. Eye for beauty is intense and raw. Has the same amount of empathy as a personal planet aspected to Neptune, but holds their ground and doesn’t sacrifice who they are. Looks for the good in every person. 

Venus square Pluto
An individual with this aspect may have held deep grudges and indulged too much in lust and selfishness to the point where they must redeem themselves and change their behaviour in order to seek peace and happiness in this life. One way an individual can fix this behaviour is by teaching others to love and to give because teaching someone something is actually a very strategic way of teaching yourself as well. 

Venus opposite Pluto
In this aspect, the individual is likely to encounter people like described in the square who are likely going to use them for pleasure and their own motives. This sort of emotional abuse can obviously take a toll on someone and carve this sort of individual into a secretive and closed-off character. The individual may have bad experiences in love that will lead them to believe that love does not exist or that they should freeze their heart from any sort of feeling of love. They may also be blind to the love that is already in their life and won’t realize it until they’ve lost it. Avoid people who are manipulative and are secretive of your affair with them, be aware of abusive people. Don’t let others destroy the concept of love to you. Give love where it is genuinely deserved, but at the same time, don’t expect anything back… Be patient with love. Appreciate and value when love is given to you.

'Meet BTS, the K-Pop Group Loved By Wale and Charlie Puth'

Teen Vogue: How did you feel about landing in the U.S. iTunes Top 10 in February?

Rap Monster: Reaching the top of any music chart is a thrill, but this was a shock. We were on [a strict TV appearance] schedule at that time, so it wasn’t like I could scream or anything (laughs).

Jin: It was ‘Wow. Are you serious? Really?’ It was similar to what I thought when I first heard that Wings charted at 26 on the Billboard 200 last year. How cool is that!

Teen Vogue: For those new to BTS, what song and which video should they check out?

RM: Hmmm, it’s like choosing between your mom and your dad, who do you like better! “Fire” was loved by so many, so that’s the song.

Jin: I’d recommend “Blood Sweat & Tears” because I got the lead role and I kind of lead the whole story of video! And, of course, it’s beautifully designed and choreographed.

V: I, too, think it’s “Blood Sweat & Tears.” It had so many metaphors and I had to make a lot of guesses to understand the relationship between characters. And there’s a scene where I make a strange smile to give you a chill, which I love!

Teen Vogue: Rap Monster, K-Pop groups usually have designated roles for the members and yours is BTS’s leader, but what does that mean to you?

RM: It’s my official role to represent BTS to the world and it’s been a chance for me to mature as a person, but, behind the scenes, I’m just one of seven members and I’m inspired by the others all the time. I get free life lessons from J-Hope and Jimin, sometimes it’s like they’re 10 years older than me.

Teen Vogue: OK, let’s play a little game. You’re now at the mercy of another member describing you.

Jungkook: Jin used to be an ordinary guy in the team, but he’s the mood maker now. He’s the most wicked and funniest of all. No one in BTS is normal though, come to think of it.

Jin: Jungkook’s delicate voice always mesmerizes our ears and that’s definitely his role in BTS.

V: Jimin is a real piece of cuteness, like the youngest in the family.

Jimin: V’s specialty is getting all the attention from others onto him!

J-Hope: Suga is a true caretaker. He’s kind of a hidden leader who takes care of everyone.

Suga: J-Hope’s a real hope-maker. He’s such a ‘hope-generator.’

Teen Vogue: BTS have become highly respected for penning their own tracks. When you’re on tour, do you make time to write?

RM: Mostly we’re in the hotel when we’re not on [our promotional] schedule so I bring all my equipment. I wake up, if I have a rehearsal, I go do that and when I come back to the hotel, I sit down and turn on the laptop, cause I’ve got nothing to do without that!

Teen Vogue: When you’ve got a new demo, such as the rough guide to Wings, do you take it to another member and play it and ask for feedback?

Suga: I usually have as many people listen to it as possible because I think it really helps make it a better track. I always get great feedback from the rest of the band.

RM: Firstly, I take it to (BTS’s executive producer) P.Dogg. If he likes it, he sometimes puts it into the album. I really trust him, he’s got the eye for it.

Teen Vogue: If P.Dogg says no, will you fight for it?

RM: Yeah, of course, I really fight for it! I’m like, ‘Hey, this is the thing I gotta do right now. If you won’t do it, I’ll put it into my mixtape!’ The last one I fought for was ‘Reflection’ — there’s an original version, a whole different song. He didn’t not like it, it just didn’t fit the Wings concept, so I’ll release it myself someday.

Suga: I think I kind of did for my mixtape, because I felt I should as AgustD [my solo moniker], and I’m glad I did.

Teen Vogue: Speaking of mixtapes, J-Hope, we’ve been looking forward to hearing yours. What can you tell us about it?

J-Hope: I’m working on it as we speak and my inspiration really depends on my daily mood swing; sometimes I like to go strong and sometimes I make softer sounds. Since it’s a mixtape, I’m trying to experiment with various genres to test myself.

Teen Vogue: Jungkook, you recently covered Charlie Puth’s “We Don’t Talk Anymore” — you teased it in January but didn’t release it until the end of February. Were you making changes? And will we hear your own songwriting any time soon?

Jungkook: I recorded it several times until I was sure that it felt and sounded perfect. I was more than ready to share it because I knew fans had been waiting, but we had You Never Walk Alone being released and I thought I’d better wait until BTS wraps up the official activities for it. I don’t feel confident about writing any of my own [material] yet, but if I ever write a song, I’d like to work on a very soft and sweet vibe.

Teen Vogue: The bigger an artist gets, the more people will try and bring them down. How does BTS deal with that side of fame?

Jimin: I’m a very positive person and I don’t easily get intimidated by people who try to bring me or BTS down. Besides, my family is always there for me.

RM: These days, I try to take everything as my fate and respond with dignity. I accept it, it’s like a shadow, it’s just there.

J-Hope: I had a firm belief that I was going to be a successful artist, and that led me to what I am. I draw all the strength I need from that belief and try to share my energy with other members as much as I can.

Teen Vogue: Rap Monster, you’ve just released a collaboration with rapper Wale, which came about through a BTS fan helping bring you guys together over Twitter. What can you tell us about working together?

RM: When he suggested the collaboration, that was a real shock. I thought about it, [and was] like, should we do a party song? But I wanted to do something different. The title is “Change” — in America. They’ve got their situations and we’ve got ours in Seoul, the problems are everywhere and the song is like a prayer for change. He talks about the police, and problems he’s faced since he was a child. For me, I talked about Korea, my problems, and about those on Twitter who kill people by keyboards.

Teen Vogue: Let’s do a finishing quickfire round! BTS experiments with a lot of genres, which one has been a challenge?

V: I always find rock difficult.

RM: I’m always ready to be challenged, like, “Wings: Outro,” it was hip-house, that was the first time I’d ever listened to that genre… but I liked it.

Teen Vogue: What do you want do while you’re in America?

RM: I want to go to Barneys and Supreme! I want to see buildings and people on the street, their faces, what they talk about, how they walk. I do that in Korea. I go to somewhere I haven’t been and just watch people and colors, that’s my inspiration.

Jimin: I really want to go on a day trip with the members. Or a picnic to Central Park on a sunny day would be nice.

Yuri on Ice interview translation - Animage 2017/01 (p20-23)

I was going to post this last week but gave priority to the BD stuff. This will be the final interview from the booklet that came with January Animage! There’s still an interview with Kenji Miyamoto left untranslated, but it will be taken care of by @whiteboxgems​ whenever she has time! I’ll reblog it when it’s around.

This is actually 2 interviews, I’m posting them together because they were one after the other and (main reason) because the second one is very short.
A few notes below to better understand the interviews.

The first one is with Yuuichirou Hayashi, the one who created the ending (ED = ending by the way) footage. I have the feeling someone previously posted translations of the captions under the ED screenshots, but I don’t remember where and I’m pretty sure it was just the captions and not the interview parts, so here you have it complete. This one is pretty interesting because he explains in detail how they created the ED, and has some extra information on cut scenes etc. Definitely a must read in my opinion!

The second one is a short interview with Kayoko Ishikawa, the one who did the costume designs. Here you might think: didn’t Chacott design the costumes? I’ll explain. It’s more or less like with Mitsurou Kubo and Tadashi Hiramatsu: Kubo created the original designs for the characters, from scratch, and Hiramatsu transformed them into designs specifically created for animation, therefore with simpler lines, detailed expression sheets and so on. Likewise, Chacott did the original designs for the costumes, from scratch, based on the indications by Yamamoto and Kubo, and then the anime’s costume designer simplified and modified them so that they would be suitable to be animated. (Before actually animating them there’s a further step: the anime’s color designer is going to decide the exact colors, shadows and highlights included, that will be used inside the anime. I translated an interview with the color designer Izumi Hirose some time ago)

I usually don’t add pictures but this time I felt that it would be better to add them as an immediate reference. However, they are just for reference and are not meant to be visually stunning, so please bear with the quality because I just took photos of the magazine with my phone and quickly edited them.

Translation under the cut! (kind of image-heavy)

***If you wish to share this translation please do it by reblogging or posting a link to it***

***Re-translating into other languages is ok but please mention that this post is the source***

Keep reading

A worker, who claimed to have worked with Versus XIII before it was changed to FFXV, has leaked some information. Knowing that Versus XIII’s theme was MISERY (Nomura himself said that) and that the game would be very dark with heavy issues, this does sound legit. The original Versus XIII concept contained such things as yakuza boss Regis, him selling Noctis for a demon so that he’s bound to serve the Goddess of Death in this life and in the next, Noctis being addicted to hallucinations causing drug (manufactured by their family) and which gives him ability to see Stella (who is a real person, but no one else sees her).

The full text in the picture says:

“For example, one of the main characters of the game, Stella, inflected bodily harm on herself so that she could commute with what she believed to be deceased relatives (this behavior was actually the result of a certain medication she was prescripted for sleep disorder earlier in life, an ironically is a major plot point – more on that later). This ultimately culminated at her accidental suicide, which the main protagonist, Noctis, being told he was responsible for her death (he wasn’t, at least not directly). Moreover, many of the cinematic sequences in the game contained depictions of violence against women (it was completely in the context of the story=, with one sequence involving the implied rape of Stella in the hands of the white haired character many have seen in the original Versus trailer (Seifaris, in English). A key scene involving a ceremony of sorts demanded to be pulled altogether, effectively ruining a major plot point. Said scene involved demonic “claiming” of Noctis in his mother’s womb, Cycillia Lorette Caelum, the ruling Queen and the wife of King Regis. Due the pact made by his father (originally a “don” sof sort the Lucii yakuza family, not the good, watered down king written much later) Noctis was bound to the servitude of Etro, Goddess of Death (in this life and the next). This covenant gave the line the Lucii the Ring of Binding, power over life and death, through the Crystal of the Void (all this will be explained in the footage, so don’t get too caught up on it). So that the course had to be cut, citing “potentially sensitive religious content” since the character (Noctis) was more or less written as this world’s antichrist, cursed by his father in a deal with the power behind the Void to bring the coming apocalypse.

 A sequence involving a car chase and shootout, giving the player the option to kill Insomnian citizens. This is only due the fact that the target is running and attempting to hide within the crowd. This was probably one of my favorite early game scenarios, involving Noctis, Varis (bald headed bodyguard character that drives Noctis in a particular trailer, the one that keeps telling him to wake up), GLadio and Ignis. If you takes with delivering a large quantity of a street drug (secretly manufactured by a pharmaceutical company ownded by the Lucii family, of course) called Lunatelristium, marketed ad Lunatel, street name “Luna” (seriously though) that causes its user to have a lucid dreaming effect, where the individual is awake, yet sees things in the real would as through it’s a dream (loved ones long expired, ghosts, demons, locations changing back to how they looked in your earlier memories ect. It works on putting the minf in a state on conscious REM) – originally developed as a military grade sleep substitute for the Insomnian military (this concept was later adopted into the Magitek project), and used in a weaponized forms against a particular nation with disastrous effects. 

Noctis being addicted to this substance was absolutely essential to how the was able to interact with the female protagonist (Stella), as no one else would see her for a certain plot reasons, all of which is revealed about two hours into the game. He is only convinces that she is a hallucination after being held and interrogated by the INPD (yes, the original game had a police department in Insomnia, along with all the other normal things you would see in any regular city) – with the division head showing him camera footage of him covering no one as the bullet are being fired at him (Noctis thought he was covering Stella). Stella is in fact real, but it is a bit too convulsed to type without me spending 30 more minutes that I don’t have. Much of this information I did not release in my initial post months ago anonymously, because quite frankly, I was afraid of losing my job and legal ramifications. Now that much  has changed thanks to fan outcry (yes, they DO listen),a lot has changed… which I can’t discuss at this particular moment.

Now, you have my permission to release these plot details, but I am going to be honest in saying that I don’t know if Square will immediately hit your channel with a cease and desists, citing ownership of the content, but the fact is you won’t be posting any content, only information that is valid. This is where it becomes complicated and I cannot give you the best advice.”

Also a following message from the leak:

“ Hi, I am OP. I will clarify this point. Everything to described is unfortunately accurate, (I did not write it, that is the way they are explained). These events are listed as Chapter 1, with the second chapter beginning with Insomnia’s Crown City have its crystal actually extracted, by a small team of special forces units that literally blow the gates to the thrown room to get to the Crystal Vault (from the email). The key person is the white haired individual who is the adopted brother of Stella, who uses the spell ‘holy’ to nullify the unholy magic sealing the crystal, causing a magical explosion that takes out the top of the Lucii Family’s tower. They then storm the building with these forces in what is described as a “ruthless massacre”, shooting simply people who work there and don’t even have knowledge of the Crime Family’s illegal activities OR the Crystal. Holy is cast and the Vault opens revealing the Crystal. it is then “smuggled out”, collapsing the “Embrace of Etro”, something that causes the city to stay in perpetual night and be covered in a huge blueish shield. Then a coordinated attack with Magitek airships and Walkers start invading during Noctis’ Art of Insomnia Ball where he meets Stella. This is when the attack formally commences. I will post unreleased storyboards to display this with text in Japanese and english below it.

Sorry I could not type more. I am being bombarded. “

ALSO; if this is true, we will get this original game in some extent:

“Hi, I am OP. This is the next FF project that will enter full development when Episode 2 of FFVIIRemake has begun. The source says the development team is simply calling it "Final Fantasy Versus”. No number.Likewise, Nomura did not come to Square to request it, but agreed it will be made in an agreement with him supporting FFVIIR project fully. Via e-mail. Thank you.I’m sorry, I know nothing else development specific.“”

ree-fireparrot  asked:

How realistic or unrealistic are battle couples, provided they have sufficient mental discipline? Is it even realistic to have two people working together to fight the same opponent hand-to-hand, or is focusing on both your opponent and your partner too much? What if one person is a distraction (by fighting the opponent head-on) so the other person can stab them in the back, so to speak? Is that too risky?

You’re asking a lot of questions here and most of them have absolutely nothing to do with having a romantic relationship with your working partner.

Some things first:

1) The relationship between a battle couple and any platonic working partnership are not really any different in most cases except that they share a romantic relationship.

2) You don’t need a functional or professional partnership or partnership at all to fight in a group or gang up on an individual.

3) Fraternization just as often falls into casual sex as it does a romantic relationship, if not more often.

4) Almost none of what you’re asking has to do with romance.

Falling in love on the battlefield happens, it happens a lot. Combat is a high stress environment and people are people. Just because something isn’t a good idea or is unprofessional doesn’t mean it won’t happen, it just means you’ve got an added benefit of complications.

Some people can handle romantic relationships with an SO who also engages in combat, even one who engages in combat with them. Those are the ones who can compartmentalize between being on the battlefield and being off it. However, if they can’t (there is a very good possibility that they can’t) then it becomes a real problem. When they can’t handle the stress or the distraction, if they can’t put the romance aside, then their relationship puts everyone at risk, including their mission.

When you’re fighting, especially with a goal in mind, one person’s life cannot be more important than the mission.

It takes a significant amount of trust for a battle couple to function because their romantic partner cannot afford to jump in and save them when things start going sideways. Both participants need to be the kind of people that when the choice is between their partner or the mission, they choose the mission.

This concept is one that’s very difficult to grasp if you’re setting out to write a romance, because most of the normal steps you’d take to fulfill that romance will leave the battle couple hamstrung and unable to function. You can’t have the guy or girl jumping in to save their guy or girl when it looks like they’re about to die, they have to trust their partner to save themselves.

That is hard.

This is a very difficult state to handle emotionally. Imagine, you are at risk of losing your loved one at all times and you can’t do a damn thing about it. You can’t obsess or brood over it, because you can’t afford that kind of distraction. Whether they’re right in front of you or on a battlefield somewhere else, you can’t think about it. You’ve got to focus on keeping yourself alive, because that keeps everyone else alive, and by doing what you can you help to ensure the survival of both your loved one and your team. You’ve got to do your job, even when you’re about to lose everything you ever gave a damn about and its within your power to stop it.

A true battle couple is one who exists in complete equality, trust, and partnership with their significant other on the battlefield. They keep a cool head and a cool heart while in the midst of gut wrenching emotional turmoil. They don’t baby, they don’t hover, they don’t keep a careful eye on, and they don’t obsess until the fighting’s over. They don’t sacrifice their own life or their own body to keep their lover from getting injured. They don’t break position.

If they do any of the above, they will both die and so will anyone who is relying on them. If you are writing characters where the relationship is more important than the mission, more important than the team, more important than surviving the fight in front them then you have, narratively speaking, a serious problem.

This is not a bad one to have in a story or an unrealistic one in life, romantic relationships on the battlefield are built around this concept, but it does need to be addressed. If its not, tragedy strikes.

If you’re writing a battle couple, you need two characters who when faced with the choice between saving their loved one and stopping the bomb from blowing up downtown Manhattan, they pick the bomb.

And, in fiction, that’s not normally what love is.

It also has to be both of them, they both need this very specific outlook to function while in combat together. If one has it, but the other doesn’t then tragedy strikes. If neither have it, tragedy strikes. They need to be on the same page.

The reason why the military and other combat groups prohibit fraternization is because romantic relationships inevitably fuck everything up. If they can handle it, great. However, the all to likely outcome, for either one or both parties involved, is they can’t.

They’ll do it anyway though, because people are people.

When you engage in violence, that violence and training separates you from the general population. You’ve been through experiences that most people cannot comprehend or relate to and that makes maintaining relationships difficult. There’s a lot to be said for being in a relationship with someone of similar background, who can empathize with your experiences, who has been through what you’ve been through. You don’t need to look much further than the rate of divorce among the FBI or CIA to understand just how difficult maintaining a relationship in an incredibly stressful environment is.

As humans, we crave having a partner we can relate to. With whom we can share our secrets. Who won’t judge us for the terrible things we’ve done. When you have to rely on each other for survival, attraction, desire, even love becomes easy. It’s often a false sense of connection built on desperation, one which if born inside the environment won’t function outside of it, but that doesn’t mean it feels any less real.

When you might die tomorrow, sometimes you just want to feel something, anything at all, and that’s where the causal sex comes in.


Casual Sex:

In mixed gender units, casual sex is really common. Not romantic relationships, mind. It’s just sex, and it doesn’t go any further than that. It’s desperation, it is all about sensation, and a reminder for the participants that they are alive.

When dealing with these types of relationships in your fiction, its important to remember that the emotional component is neither needed nor wanted. They’re not looking for comfort. They’re looking for sensation, to feel something before they (potentially) die.

Because the author controls everything in their fictional world, it can often become difficult to remember and insert qualities like the random chance of dealing with the unknown. We’ve often got characters that are necessary to the plot, who become identified as “safe”, and behave differently because they know they’re going to live through the fight or battle to get to the end of the story.

It becomes important to learn to live in the moment. To live in the twilight hour on the night before a battle, to be unsure, when the character doesn’t know what will happen next. If you don’t then there is a whole array of human emotions, experiences, and terrible choices that you’ll never touch on in your fiction.

If you don’t, you’ll be all the poorer for it.

The Two on One Battle: Real.

You don’t need to be in a relationship, or even particularly well-trained, to accomplish this. Two versus one happens a lot and the pair off usually wins because eight limbs trumps four. One person locks up the individual, the other circles and attacks on vectors they can’t defend from. We’re social animals. Our natural instincts will help us more when we’re fighting in a group as opposed to fighting alone.

1 v Group is a bad situation to be in if you’re the one, and it doesn’t matter how well trained you are. Numbers will kill you.

Part of the reason why you see single characters fighting groups in movies and other fiction is to establish that they’re great fighters. The problem is that this has become so widespread that we now think fighting a group is easier than fighting a single, skilled individual. This is untrue. The group will kill you because the individuals within the group can move onto vectors that cannot be defended.

What your describing in your question in a battle between three people in a two on one is normal behavior, its standard tactics. However, you’re also demonstrating the exact kind of behavior for why two people engaged in a romantic relationship should not be on the battlefield together.

If you’re ever sitting there and wondering if something that is a basic and bog standard tactic is now, suddenly, too dangerous because your characters are dating then that is the exact problem.

Things that are normal suddenly become too risky, and the focus transitions to preserving their lover’s life rather than making use of their significant advantage over their enemy.

That is the exact kind of thinking which will cost them their lives, and for no benefit at all.

Good job.

-Michi

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What about the RFA and Unknown and V finding out that MC has a career in the arts (author, artist, actor or something like that?) @saeranlover


Lol it’s been like 5,000 years since I’ve done a request, here you go bbies

Yoosung:

  • It was always a lingering thought in Yoosung’s mind
  • The thought always came randomly, but sometimes he swore that he  recognized your voice
  • Like the one time you yelled “Come at me!” at a friend who was teasing you and he just froze for a second to think about why it sounded familiar
  • It wasn’t until one day he was testing out a LOLOL character he’s never played before and she screamed out a line of dialogue before her attack
  • And suddenly he heard your voice behind him perfectly recreate the line
  • He turned around to see you cheekily grinning from your place on the bed
  • But it was wiped off your face soon enough because baby boi just pounced you into a big hug
  • “MC WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOU VOICED A CHARACTER IN LOLOL I WOULD’VE PLAYED AS HER MORE OFTEN IF I KNEW.”
  • You giggled as he rapidly asked you other things you voice acted in and gawked when he recognized the other characters you’ve voiced in games and cartoons
  • He’ll shyly ask you to reenact his favorite lines or scenes and his inner fanboy will show
  • Yoosung’s never really been into the behind the scenes stuff but he already somewhat was a fan of yours before so he’s basically dating his favorite VA
  • Silly lil’ peanut is gonna ask for your autograph on his merch of the characters you’ve voiced

Jaehee:

  • She found out during one of your nights in
  • You were in the kitchen preparing the snacks while Jaehee sorted through the set of musicals the two of you had rented for tonight (you finally convinced her that watching ‘Promiscuous Jalapeno’ for the 8th time in a row was a little much)
  • Once that was all said and done, you cuddled up to Jaehee while the movie started as she fed you popcorn
  • Oh crap, you recognized this movie
  • You actually got the part of the main dancer in this film (it was your typical dance batte film)
  • You somewhat never wanted her to find out  that you were an actor/dancer in fear of always being compared to Zen
  • Once your character was introduced, Jaehee’s eyes squinted a little at the screen before gasping and shaking your shoulders
  • “MC, MC, IS THAT YOU?”
  • “U-uhm nooooo…?”
  • “Wait, why would you keep this secret from me?”
  • After explaining your reasoning as to why, she just pulled you into a tight hug
  • “I’d never compare you anyone else, I love you just the way you are, famous or not!”
  • After watching the movie, she put aside the time to scour the internet for every performance you’ve been in and is about to be the proud owner of all your merch
  • jaehee please no that was our grocery money

Zen:

  • “lolol zen have you seen mc’s latest cover?”
  • “Cover? What’re you talking about?”
  • “the one on her youtube channel???”
  • “…”
  • “you do know what she does for a living, right??”
  • After Seven endlessly mocked Zen for not knowing what his own girlfriend did for a living, Seven graciously provided the link to your Youtube channel
  • Zen then proceeded to spend the next 3 hours of his life going through
  • your entire channel
  • He knew that you liked to sing and sounded like an angel but this
  • This is something extraordinary
  • You actually made a living doing this and he never even knew!
  •  He finally made his way up to your latest cover (which was uploaded about a week ago), and HO L Y  C R A P
  • It was the song he’s practiced at home for months on end for a musical he recently just starred in!
  • When you get home that night, you’re bombarded with compliments and questions (mostly compliments)
  • You explained that you never recorded around him because you were afraid that he might’ve thought you were going to use him for popularity
  • “Babe, I know you would never do that NOW WILL YOU PLEASE DUET WITH ME–”
  • Guess who has the best mashup cover of ‘Butterfly’ now

Jumin:

  • Coming home a few hours early was indeed a rare occurrence for Jumin
  • Usually when he came home, you were instantly there to greet him with a hug and kiss
  • He called your name, but there was no response, just a faint typing sound
  • After hanging his coat on the coat hanger, he began walking towards the noise, his hands already working on loosening his tie
  • “Ah, here you are, my love,” he said upon entering the officeroom
  • “Jumin, you’re home early,” you smiled, letting your husband wrap his arms around your shoulders and resting his chin atop your head
  • “The office had to close early for some renovations,” Jumin explained, “but I’m more interested in what you’re working on.”
  • “I’m working on my next book!”
  • The surprised look on his face made you remember that you never brought it up to him before, but now is as good as time as any to explain
  • Jumin seemed genuinely intrigued as he listened to your explanation on your book series, which was apparently very popular
  • When you finished, he asked if you could lend him the first addition, as he did enjoy reading in his spare time
  • And soon enough, he was hooked
  • He’d have long talks with you over dinner on how he wasn’t expecting a plot twist or how well you wrote your characters
  • Or about how you should hurry and finish the next book because you left him on a cliffhanger

707:

  • He’s known since the background check that you had a job in digital art but he tucked that away in the back of his head because there were too many other things happening at the time (eg the hacker, your sudden appearance, his emotions and job…)
  • It isn’t until one day where he’s been able to work for a few hours straight without you lecturing him about how he should take a break
  • So he got up from his chair, slapped his right leg a few times to wake it up, and ventured outside his office to find you
  • To no surprise, you were huddled inside in the bedroom, but this time with your drawing tablet in hand
  • “Hey Saeyoung,” you tiredly muttered, eyes still glued to the laptop screen
  • His eyes trailed to where you were looking and a look of mock hurt morphed on his face, “MC, how dare you draw a picture of another man!”
  • You stifled a laugh at your boyfriend’s dramatic tone, “Zen just asked me to draw some things for his website so I’m–”
  • You should me drawing me instead! Here, I’ll even pose for you!” 
  • You regret even looking behind you, because Saeyoung was already stripping down to his boxers, need I remind you the pair with cat faces on them
  • “DRAW ME LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS.”
  • “SAEYOUNG PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON AND GET TO BACK TO WORK!”

V:

  • Usually you were making some sort of noise in the house, but today you were oddly quiet
  • “MC? Where are you?”
  • “I’m in the living room,” you hollered back as he started making his way over, “Be careful not to bump my arm though.”
  • “What’re you doing?” he asked, taking a seat on the floor next to you
  • You explained that you liked paint and used it as a way to make some extra pocket money
  • V was very happy and excited to hear that you had an artistic career just like him
  • You were always delighted to describe the paintings to him, and you always did it with such passion
  • After awhile, he started to miss photography and he so badly wanted to see your work for himself
  • So he decided to get the eye surgery
  • Once he did, he was appalled at how much he can see your heart poured onto the canvas
  • You often went out into nature together and sit there together for hours to photograph/paint and enjoy one another’s company
  • You also loved painting some of V’s older photographs and he loved it and every single one is framed in the house
  • #artsycouple
  • The day you painted a picture of the sun and gave it to him, he cried

Unknown:

  • The first time Saeran ever walked into your room, his eyes immediately darted to the big, colorful collection of sticky note pads on your desk
  • He picked one up, noting that every one had a slightly different drawing than the others, “What’re these for?”
  • “Oh, I’m an animator! I like to use these sticky notes when I’m bored.”
  • He never got to watch cartoons as a child so this was all new to him
  • Watching you peacefully work is very, very soothing to him, to just watch the lines fill with color so smoothly
  • You even let him have some of your already drawn-on sticky note pads and he likes to flip through them when he’s nervous or needs to calm down when something’s bothering him
  • His favorite is the one you made for him where it goes “I love you, Saeran!” with a cute little doodle of a cartoony-looking you kissing his cheek on it
  • As mentioned before, he never got to watch cartoons or movies as a kid and he’s willing to watch the ones you’ve worked on
  • It always amazes him that you made what was on the screen and he loves it (he’s never said it out loud but it shows on his face)
  • He really enjoys the ones that are story-based rather than the nonsense slapstick ones (which is what Saeyoung enjoys, much to his dismay)
  • Seeing the childlike innocence in his eyes is heartwarming and you wouldn’t trade it for the world 

anonymous asked:

so i just need to vent this out but i truly fucking despise Mon-El 'cause he just fucking guilt-tripped Kara into liking him and when that didn't work & she rejected him, he went on and plays fucking victim with his "well you rejected me so its time to move on" dialogue putting blame on Kara for causing him heartbreak while basically shoving into Kara's face that she's easily replaceable by dating her fucking co-worker in like a day. fucking fuck! fuck! omg can he just leave the show already?!

Originally posted by totheskyirise

Anon, you have come to the right blog my g. Vent all you fucking please, I am here to listen, throw salt, and deck bitches with you.

I was so hyped for this episode! M’Gann was back! Vasquez was back! All I need was a little bitta Lucy and Lena and my bitch ass was set. Fuck, even the general premise of the episode looked damned good too.

And then

And then

AND THEN

AND FUCKING THEN

They had to go ahead and ruin is with that rat face looking oik and his manipulation of Kara. I’m not taking this lightly. What Mon-El did was flat out abusive. There’s no way around it. What he did was textbook gaslighting.

Man-Hell confessed his feelings for Kara, and when she didn’t reciprocate he made her feel guilty. Like she was in the wrong. And then Kara began to second guess herself, she wasn’t as happy, and she tried to apologise for not reciprocating his feelings. Then he proceeded to manipulate her with that “well you rejected me so its time to move on” crap that was designed to make her feel bad.

THIS PLOT HAS EXTENDED BEYOND ‘GUILT TRIPPING’ AND HAS MOVED INTO ABUSE TERRITORY

You’re being gaslit (a form of abuse) if:

1. You are constantly second-guessing yourself Kara was constantly second guessing herself that episode about Man-Hell. The whole last scene with Alex was “maybe I do like him” babes you don’t and that’s okay she was second guessing herself so much during that last scene

2. You ask yourself, “Am I too sensitive?” a dozen times a day. This was never explicitly explored, but Kara practically confesses this to Alex implicitly during the last scene that she’s too emotional for her own good (she’s not).

3. You often feel confused and even crazy at work. Kara wasn’t acting like herself at CatCo or the DEO, do I need to bring up the evidence of her snapping the computer or slamming her hand on the DEO desk.

4. You’re always apologizing to your mother, father, boyfriend, boss. Kara was apologising for her behaviour, when she had no reason to be sorry for not reciprocating his fucking feelings. 

5. You can’t understand why, with so many apparently good things in your life, you aren’t happier. KARA WAS NOT HAPPY AT ALL THIS EPISODE FUCKING LOOK AT HER

6. You frequently make excuses for your partner’s behavior to friends and family. Ummmmmmm, do I even need to explain this one? She’s constantly making excuses for Mon-El’s behaviour.

7. You find yourself withholding information from friends and family so you don’t have to explain or make excuses. KARA WITHHELD THE FACT THAT MON-EL KISSED FOR MONTHS BEFORE SHE SPOKE TO ANYONE ABOUT IT. AND WHO KNOWS HOW LONG SHE WITHHELD THE ENDING OF 2X10

8. You know something is terribly wrong, but you can never quite express what it is, even to yourself. Again, do I have to mention the bar scene with Alex, and then the end scene with Alex? Because she so obviously couldn’t convey what she was feeling in those scenes, she was tripping over her words left right and centre.

9. You start lying to avoid the put downs and reality twists. Kara keeps lying to Alex about being okay when it is so obvious that she is not o-fucking-kay.

10. You have trouble making simple decisions. Kara couldn’t even decide what drink she wanted at the bar for christ’s sake. 

11. You have the sense that you used to be a very different person - more confident, more fun-loving, more relaxed. KARA LITERALLY HASN’T BEEN HERSELF FOR THE PAST FEW EPISODES. SHE ISN’T AS HAPPY ANYMORE. DID YOU SEE THE PAIN IN HER EYES WHEN SHE WAS TELLING ALEX AND MANHELL

12. You feel hopeless and joyless. Look at how she sounds after that conversation in the bar with ManHell when she begins to talk to M’Gann. She’s so deflated and defeated in that following scene. Not to mention how she looked at the end of 2x10 and 2x11. Those stills break my fucking heart.

13. You feel as though you can’t do anything right. Kara has convinced herself that she’s fucked up with Alex, that she’s fucked up with Winn and that she’d fucked up with James. 2x11 was Kara thinking she’s fucked up which is why no one will celebrate her earth birthday with her.

14. You wonder if you are a “good enough” girlfriend/ wife/employee/ friend; daughter. Again, not explicit, only implicit, Kara feels like she isn;t good enough for anyone to celebrate her earth birthday with. 

15. You find yourself withholding information from friends and family so you don’t have to explain or make excuses. KARA WITHHELD THE FACT THAT MON-EL KISSED FOR MONTHS BEFORE SHE SPOKE TO ANYONE ABOUT IT BECAUSE SHE DIDN’T WANT TO HURT MANHELL’S *FEELINGS*

EPISODE 2X11 IS A TEXTBOOK EXAMPLE OF KARA BEING GASLIT BY MON-EL.

I’m distraught to say the least. This is a disgusting, vile, toxic, unhealthy rapport the writers are creating between Mon-El and Kara. It isn’t cute. It’s isn’t *goals*. It’s literally textbook definition abuse. This is a show that embraces the empowerment of women, yet it has sidelined it’s female lead, isolated her from the other characters and enforced this hetero mayo frat boy onto her so so she’ll cling to him for dear life because God forbid Kara Danvers wants a fucking friend instead of a damn love interest.

I’m worried for all of the abuse survivors watching the show. Having to watch the CW validate and encourage this gross behaviour. I worry for the current victims of abuse (like myself), witnessing Kara going through what they’re going through, and seeing Kara’s friends and family condone what’s happening to her. Encouraging her to remain in that environment. It’s sickening and it’s damaging and it’s fucking dangerous.

If you’re watching Supergirl right now, and you’re thinking to yourself what’s happening to Kara is happening to me

You an amazing, beautiful individual who deserves to be loved and who has done nothing wrong. You are not to blame. If you think you’re being gaslit, here are some links that you might find helpful. (x) (x) (x) (x) (x)

(A table of contents is available. This series will remain open for additional posts and the table of contents up-to-date as new posts are added.)

Part Four: Writing Travel With Non-Humans

If a list were made of the top mistakes made by–particularly fantasy–writers, surely travel, travel times, distances, and the needs of animals during that travel would be right up there. Consider for a moment that Frodo and Sam’s journey took approximately 6 months to get from the Shire to Mount Doom. But Pear, you say, it’s not like they were walking that whole time! They stayed in Rivendell for two months after he agrees to take the ring! And of course, you’d be right, but consider that they are two days in Moria, and it takes the group 7 days to get from Bree to Weathertop, a time frame which was just travel, for the most part. Take a look at it on a map:

And now consider the entirety of the world map:

Taking into consideration breaks for eating and sleeping, difficult terrain, horses, boats, and walking, Tolkien did a fairly good job of making sure the travel times for his world were accurate or at least plausible.

Now consider that 30 miles is the maximum a human can walk in a day without stops and without considering gear, and it’s more accurate to guesstimate ~10-15 miles. It’s ~40 miles from Washington DC to Baltimore, Maryland and can be driven in ~1 hour. Now consider that roads and highways have turned difficult terrain into easily navigable areas, and that cars have drastically lengthened how far and how long we can travel. A team of horses pulling a carriage can expect approximately 50 miles over an 8-12 hour day. A horse will tire from a gallop after approximately 3 miles, but could trot 15 miles without too much strain as long as a few breaks to walk were interspersed. It’s been recorded that on one particular journey, a horse averaged 31 miles per day, though 20 is a more reasonable. (I haven’t put anything regarding companions with wings due to severe variability. Migrating Alpine swifts have been known to fly 200 days straight while other birds don’t even really glide very well. If your companion has wings, do very thorough research into wing bones and strength and do your best.) My point is: We don’t go as far as we think we do, and neither do our creature companions unless we care for them properly.

Long story short, distance matters.

When you’re trying to decide how long it takes to get from one place to another in your story, or attempting to figure out how long it would take an advancing army to reach their destination, consider that our modern view of maps and distances has become severely warped. “It’s not that far,” and “They could make it there in a couple of hours,” and “They’ll be here tomorrow,” are common assumptions for writers, but they might not take into consideration that our characters, creature or otherwise, cannot travel all day without pause, even on roads.

Terrain

Remember to take terrain into consideration. Your creatures accompanying your characters have different physiology than your humanoid characters, so how fast can they travel? Do they have the body strength to be able to carry someone, specifically the spinal strength? Remember that the more people you add to the back of a creature, the slower the creature will travel, even horses. Additionally, consider what their feet are made from. A horse’s hooves are a dense material that takes long usage fairly well (rocks and terrain difficulties aside) which is part of why they (and other hoofed creatures) make good pack animals and “vehicles,” alongside other factors. We don’t go around riding creatures with paws because paws rub raw faster when burdened with weight and asked to go long distances. Creatures traveling on their own legs will travel differently over different terrain. Remember when I mentioned earlier in the series that you should be thinking about where your creature companions originate from? Their physiology will be tailored to travel best over that kind of terrain. If they’re from meadows, rocky mountains will slow them down. Obviously, travel speeds will change depending on the terrain, and the endurance of your creatures will, too. Horses will become lame if rocks or other materials become lodged in their hooves (think about having a rock in your shoe!). Consider how terrain could impact your creature companion in similar ways depending on the construction of their feet.

Food & Water

The most common trope for feeding our humanoid characters on their journey is that they have rations in their packs: dried fruit, tough bread, hunks of cheese, dried meat jerky, etc. What’s often forgotten about is sufficient and appropriate food and water for creature companions. Water retention and metabolism rates vary widely across creatures. You can’t assume that they’ll function like your humanoids do.

When you were planning your creature companion and where they came from, I asked you to consider what kind of eaters they are (herbivore, carnivore, omnivore) to get a good basic idea of what your companions eat. They’re likely not going to be carrying around their food like your humanoids might, so you need to plan for your characters to either be hunting for the creature or to allow the creature to go off and hunt. But don’t just say, “They went off to hunt, returning three hours later with a bloody maw.” You need to know if the area they paused in has the types of foods your creature eats available. Know the environments they’re traveling in; know what’s around and what’s not. It’s okay for your creatures to go without a meal now and then, but it’s not going to make them happy or pleasant to be around the longer they miss out on food. Be aware of how their personality, their travel speed, their fighting capability, and their focus will be impacted when they are forced to go without food.

For emergency water supplies, it’s recommended to carry 1 gallon of water per person per day while cats and dogs generally need 1 gallon each per 3 days. These measures are not taking travel into account, which would raise the predicted amounts. We almost never think about having that much water hanging around our characters for their trek across wherever, but giving our creatures the breaks they will need and the water they’ll need often gets entirely forgotten. Take breaks. All-day travel is hard, hard work on anyone, car or not. Make sure your characters are traveling between places with potable water, whether that’s sources like rivers or cities with wells.

Stress, Sleep, and Special Care

Travel isn’t a walk in the park. It’s a long, grueling journey, filled with difficult decisions and dangerous encounters. There’s socializing and surviving, and it’s not as simple as going out to do the thing. Stress is going to come into play more and more the longer your characters and creatures travel. Think about how this increase in stress will effect your creature companions. Do they know what’s going on? What’s their perspective on the trip? Have they perceived themselves in danger yet? How will they react when they do? How do they deal with being forced to spend a prolonged amount of time in close quarters with others? Is that normal and welcome to them, or is it strange and not preferred? Will they seek out their own space or stick close to the others?

Remember that sleep is not going to be ideal. It may be few and far between, after long days of intense activity, interrupted by attacks, unfulfilling because of discomfort or anxiety, or any number of other things. You still need to consider how your creature would normally try to sleep, and then think about how they could if they needed to, because, trust me, they’re going to need to. Similar questions to those above should be considered including how your creature will handle going some sleepless nights. How will its mood and ability to handle changes in plan be impacted by lack of sleep? How about appetite and willingness to perform? All the problems we encounter with sleep, sleeplessness, interrupted sleep, and less-than-preferred amounts of sleep will need to be considered for your creatures, as much as for your humanoids.

Some creatures will need tending to when travel ceases, whether for a break or at the end of a day. They may need special attention like horses having their tack removed and a nice rub down, or creatures that traveled in a backpack or on a shoulder may need to wander a bit and stretch the legs. Please, please, pay attention to these things. There’s nothing worse than reading poor animal care from a farm boy going on their first big adventure. Casual mentions of the care and attention are sufficient, but completely ignoring this facet leaves out a big part of what travel is with a creature companion. If your creature is a mythical beast, break it down to its root characteristics to determine how they may need to be bedded down for the night. Are your dragons more lizard-like and likely to seek out warm places for the evening, perhaps burrowing for a nest in the ground? Are your hippogryphs able to find enough materials to nest in or do they take more to the horse side of things and sleep standing? Break things down and determine appropriate care for your creatures, then make sure your humanoids are performing those actions they need to ensure comfort for their companions.

Look. Just don’t forget you’ve got another character who has different needs. Don’t pass them off, don’t forget about them, don’t gloss over them. If you’re going to have a creature companion, you need to make sure you’re treating them like any other character and paying attention to their wants and needs the way you do for humanoids. Make sure you’re not asking them to go too far, too fast, without appropriate access to food and water. Take care of your creatures!

Next up: Contributing abilities!

Wait For Me To Come Home - Sebastian x Reader - One Shot

Originally posted by mebeingbored1

A/N - Got myself into the little sebby family mood again. Featuring Isabella as always aha.

Sebastian x Reader - You are completely secure in your relationship with Sebastian, until you start reading some articles that make you doubt yourself. Sebastian gets rid of your insecurities by helping you relive some of your memories together.

Warnings: Fluff and angst  - It’s a long one.

Keep reading

Last Game Summary *MAJOR SPOILERS*

MAJOR SPOILERS! If you don’t want to be spoiled about Last Game just don’t read this. Also, for those who are gonna spazz and post about the summary PLEASE DON’T SPOIL FOR OTHERS WHO DON’T WISH TO BE SPOILED. (There are people trust me). If you are gonna post about Last Game please use the hashtag #last game spoilers so people can block it. Thank you.

The show I went to had the liveviewing for the seiyuu greetings as well so I’ll write a bit of that after this.

Now if you want to be spoiled, please continue!!

Keep reading

Lay With Me

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! A little smutty something for you guys. I didn’t put a specific character for this so I’m letting your imagination run wild with this smutty fic. Enjoy as always and happy reading!

Warnings: Smut (unsafe smut), swearing

Word Count: 1273

(gifs not mine, credits to the owners)

You laid on your stomach, scrolling on your phone as you waited for him to get home, wanting the feel of his skin against you, his lips, his embrace, everything. You sighed. You weren’t a fan really of him going home at late hours even though you don’t really sleep early as well but you wanted to just cuddle for a longer time until you fall asleep. You were starting to fall asleep but you fought it in hopes he might come home any time now. You looked over to your nightstand, the clock flashing 8:30 pm. You considered to take a few minutes of nap just because you were tired and your eyes felt too heavy for some reason.

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I’m Not His, I’m Yours // A Dylan O’Brien Smut

Prompt: Just prepare your eyes for some very dirty filth.

Warnings: NSFW, Explicit Sexual Content, Jealous!Dylan, Dominant!Dylan, Daddy!Dylan, Fingering, Orgasm Denial, Oral (female on male), Spanking, Daddy Kink, and Swearing.

Relationship: Dylan O’Brien x Reader

Word Count: 4,951

Song: Hands To Myself by Selena Gomez

A/N: THIS IS THE RESULT OF ME AND @failingmemequeen GOING ABSOLUTELY INSANE FOR DADDY DYLAN O’BRIEN. SHE CAME UP WITH THIS IDEA AND TOTALLY ENCOURAGED ME TO WRITE IT SO THANK HER FOR BEING THE BEAUTIFUL PERSON THAT SHE IS. I LOVE YOU MADI DADDY AND ABSOLUTELY ENJOYED PUTTING OUR CONJOINED FANTASIES INTO ONE.

Your name: submit What is this?

Originally posted by spidermanm

“I’m gonna kill them.” Dylan complained over the phone and I laughed at his impatience.

“No, you’re not, baby.” I chuckled, coaxing him the best I could. “It’s just one more day ‘till the weekend. You can survive this, I know it.”

“I swear to God, if either one of them annoys me one more time-”

“Then, I’ll destroy them myself.” I answered and Dylan let out a deep breath.

“I have to go, but I don’t want to hang up on you.” My boyfriend groaned over the line. “Can we just stay on the phone for the rest of the day?”

“No, Dylan.” I laughed and I could tell the sound alone made him feel a little more at ease. “We have to be responsible here. But, tell you what, when it’s time for your next break we can Skype call. What do you think?”

“I think that you’re the best girlfriend a guy could ask for and I love you very much.” Dylan swooned and I could practically hear the smile in his voice.

“I love you, too.” I responded, smiling as well. “Now go, I don’t want you getting fired.

“They can’t fire me, it’s the last season!” Dylan laughed wholeheartedly and I laughed along with him.

That’s what our relationship mostly consisted of: smiling, laughing, fun, and heart eyes. Even though Dylan has been beyond stressed lately because of everything that’s happened in the course of past two years, we never fail to make each other happy. Things have been very intense for him ever since the accident that shall not be mentioned. Shooting The Death Cure had to be pushed back to this year, Dylan had to stay home for six months and try to avoid paparazzi harassment at all times, he needed to physically train for American Assassin and completely go against his doctor’s recommendations, deal with crazy fans that literally sent him death threats when they found out he wouldn’t be in all of season 6B for Teen Wolf, and even manage to audition for future projects to top it all off. Stress has been very imminent in Dylan’s life and I always felt like it was my job to make him feel better.

Which is why, being the amazing girlfriend I am, I wasn’t going to just Skype call him. I was going to personally go over to his work and give him a fun little surprise.

With excitement running through my veins, I jumped up from my position on our bed together and immediately ran to the bathroom for a shower. Dylan’s next break should be in about an hour, considering he doesn’t have a lot of scenes to shoot this year, so I knew I had to get ready quick.

Once I was out of the shower, I put on Dylan’s favorite red lingerie and took a good look in the mirror. The way the strong red color contradicted with my skin tone will definitely drive him crazy and I can already feel myself getting wet at the thought alone. I didn’t even bother putting on any pants because I knew I wouldn’t really need them and, instead, I picked up the t-shirt Dylan used to sleep from our messy med and slipped it on. Bringing the fabric up to my nose, I took a deep breath and glady breathed in his incredible smell. Sure, I see him everyday but I can’t help feeling addictive and always needed more of him.

Putting on makeup right now just to see Dylan would be useless considering he was going to smudge it up anyway. Therefore, with a smile om my face and exhilaration running through my veins, I put on my black stillettos and grabbed my car keys to head for the Teen Wolf lot. It didn’t take too long to get there and, in a matter of fifteen minutes, I was already greeting Phil the security guard as he let me pass the barrier and enter the studio.

The first thing I did was park my car in an area Dylan would never spot and, then, gladly entered his trailer. Since Dylan hasn’t been in the greatest mood lately, I knew for a fact that he wasn’t going to stick around on set in between scenes like he usually does. From what he told me on the phone, Cody and Sprayberry have been driving him crazy all week and he’s definitely going to want as much distance as possible. Which is where I come in and make him feel all kinds of good before returning to work for the rest of the day.

Having patiently waited for Dylan, laid on his pull-out bed, I immediately jumped up and fixed myself to look sexier the moment the door to his trailer flew open. The look of surprise and immediate lust in Dylan’s eyes when he entered, instantly, made desire crash down on my body. I already knew that I would be putty in his hands in a matter of seconds. Without even saying anything, Dylan just slowly closed the door behind him and took off his sneakers as he licked his lips in anticipation.

“Do you have any idea how good you look just wearing my shirt on?” Dylan questioned, his eyebrows raised in intrigue.

“Do you have any idea how much better I’ll look once you take it off?” I teased, smirking up at him.

My words definitely sparked something in him because Dylan instantly jumped on me, the intense sexual tension in the air an incredible influence on him. I giggled at his excitement and his lips were on quickly mine as my fingers instinctively ran through his hair. I smiled when Dylan’s tongue slid across my bottom lip, already asking for an entrance, and I didn’t think twice before opening my mouth for him. He allowed me to call the shots and would moan everytime I played with his tongue skillfully.

When we both needed to breathe again, Dylan detached his lips from mine and gently caressed my cheeks with his soft hands. His eyes gazed into mine with such emotion and care that a blush immediately made its way on my skin. Dylan never failed to make me feel special and I adored how intimate our relationship was. I always thought that intimacy was about allowing someone to touch you, but it’s so much more. Intimacy is someone who touches you beyond just the physical contact because they find a way to your soul. Intimacy is who you text at four in the morning to share your biggest fears and dreams. Intimacy is the person always in the back of your mind, no matter how distracted you are.

“I love you.” Dylan whispered before pulling off his shirt I was wearing and placing a gentle kiss on my mouth.

The moment he realized I had put on his favorite lingerie set, Dylan couldn’t hold back the immediate moan that fell from his pink lips. His eyes raked my entire body and I felt his cock slightly twitch against my thigh, through his red crimson pants he wore for Stiles’ character. Standing up from the the pull-out bed, Dylan began unbuckling his belt.

Suddenly, the door to his trailer immediately flew open and the both of us froze in absolute shock. I didn’t even have the thought in me to cover myself up with something, anything, before the intruders invaded Dylan’s safe space.

“Hey, Dyl, are you trying to hide from us?” Sprayberry immediately hollered when he and Cody were inside, both instantly stopping in their tracks once they noticed their co-worker wasn’t alone. “Oh, my God!”

“What the hell are you guys doing here?!” Dylan shouted angrily, the veins on his neck bulging against his skin.

Well, looks like someone’s stress is officially back.

“W-We, uh, W-We,” Sprayberry stuttered trying to answer, but was too astonished to form an actual sentence.

Much like Dylan did just moments ago, Cody’s eyes raked my entire body and, by the way he was biting down on his bottom lip, he definitely seemed to like what he saw. Before I could even do anything, Dylan jumped back on the bed and instinctively covered my body with his. Embarrassment and uncomfort took over my emotions as my boyfriend protected me, shielding my body from unwelcome eyes.

“Get! Out!” Dylan yelled, his Alpha male side appearing now that someone glanced at his female without his permission. “NOW!”

Sprayberry was the first to immediately sprint into action, forcefully pulling Cody out the door with him and literally having to tear his gaze off of my body. I let out a nervous breath I didn’t even know I was holding in the second the door sounded shut and the two actors were finally out of the trailer.

“Damn, it’s a good thing I wasn’t naked yet, right?” I chuckled nervously, trying to make the best out of this situation. However, it was no use. Dylan was furious and no longer in the light-hearted mood like before.

“He was totally eye-fucking you and that’s what concerns you the most?” Dylan scolded and even though he was angry, my entire body filled with desire.

Dylan’s usually very sweet, but every now and then he goes completely dominant and it’s the sexiest fucking thing ever. The way he pulls my hair as he forcefully pounds into me or roughly spanks me just because I went against one of his many commands always had me on the edge.

“You’re right.” I smiled innocently, looking up at him as he noticed the tension change in the room. “I’m sorry, Daddy.”

The flicker in his eyes immediately went from rage to complete and utter lust the second I let the kinky title he loves so damn much come out of my mouth. The warm and golden-brown color once in his eyes was replaced with a dark black, his pupils now dilated to the maximum. Dylan’s bulge pressed against his pants and  I couldn’t take my eyes off of it, knowing exactly what stood beneath the fabric. Although he wasn’t the only one turned on beyond comprehension as arousal pooled uncomfortably in my panties and I desperately wanted them off of me.

Reaching my hand down to my panties to get rid of it, Dylan’s hand suddenly gripped my wrist and stopped me from moving any further.

“Did I say you could do anything yet?” Dylan questioned.

I gulped and slowly shook my head, his eyes focusing on my lip when I bit down on it. He let go of me without another word, but it didn’t even feel like he did because of his addictive touch still lingering on my skin. Dylan stood up and walked over to the door, locking it as he licked his lips with his eyes trailing over my body.

“Take off your bra.” He commanded, walking back over but not sitting down.

“What?” I asked as I watched him take off his shirt, the sight of his impressive form stunning me.

“Ah, ah, ah, babygirl. You know the rules.” Dylan tsked, shaking his head as he unbuckled his belt like before and opened his pants. “Only speak when I give you the permission to.”

Heat rushed throughout my entire body until it landed with full force in my core. Dylan and I had this little game whenever he was dominant and it was one of my favorite fucking things. The game was simple, but absolutely drove me crazy: Dylan would give me three chances and if I strike out every single one of them, he had no other choice than to punish me.

“Strike one.” Dylan stated, a smirk playing on my lips with what he said next. “And I know you just heard what I demanded.”

At the same time that I reached behind my own back to unclasp my bra, Dylan dropped his pants. His erection pressed hard against his boxers, the gray fabric slightly wet from his arousal. When both of us finished taking off our pieces of clothing, Dylan’s eyes were already glued onto my now exposed perky breasts.

“Now your panties.”

My boyfriend and I pulled both of our underwear off our bodies, watching the other intently. As soon as we were free of clothing and completely exposed to each other, Dylan grabbed himself in his hand and stroked his shaft slowly. The sight of Dylan pumping himself as his eyes gazed on my body turned me on in ways that I can’t even explain.

“Touch yourself, babygirl.” He commanded, my mind melting at his husky voice.

Following his orders, I sat up straight on the bed and spread apart by legs for him to have a full view which made him moan in response. I brought my hand down to my already soaking core and gently slid my finger through my folds, separating them. Slowly rubbing small circles against my clitoris, I couldn’t help but let out a moan. I watched as Dylan used his thumb to caress his tip and I desperately wanted it in my mouth, but I knew that I had to follow his order or else I’d be punished. However, being punished by him does sound very inviting.

Using my other hand to pinch my nipples and tease not only myself but also Dylan, I noticed his grip tighten around his member. Dylan let out an unsatisfied groan when I took my hand away from my breast, but then immediately moaned when I used it to push a finger inside my heat. My back instantly arched and I let out a whimper at the feeling provoking him to pick up his pace around himself.

“You look so beautiful pleasuring yourself, princess.” Dylan grunted as I moved faster along with him.

Of course I knew how to work myself and make my body feel good, but there’s no denying that Dylan is so much better at it. The way his long and skillfull fingers knowingly curl up inside of me in such a perfect way that not even I knew how to do or the way his sinful tongue flicks expertly against my nub has me wishing that he would just jump on top of me already. But, if there’s one thing Dylan O'Brien certainly loves is being is a fucking tease.

“Fuck, baby. Even though this feels good, nothing compares to your beautiful lips and warm mouth wrapped around my cock.” He moaned as my body craved for his touch. “Stop what your doing and come kneel in front of me.”

An exciting idea roared to life in me when I decided to ignore Dylan’s command and willingly get my next strike. I tuned out whatever he had to say and focused on the incredible feeling of my finger pumping inside of me purely to spite him. Which definitely worked because in a matter of seconds I could hear Dylan growling and approaching me. I, suddenly, felt his hands rip mine away from my body and forcefully pull me into him, our naked bodies against each other as we stood.

“Strike two.” He warned through gritted teeth, his jaw clenching and looking sexy as ever.

Before I even knew it, Dylan pushed me down to kneel in front of him and harshly grabbed onto my hair with his hands. Bringing my own hands up, I held onto his thigh with one hand and wrapped around his base with the other. I smirked at Dylan as I licked my lips and gawked at the delicious sight in front of me. I gladly took Dylan’s tip inside of my mouth and he immediately moaned when I did. The first thing my tongue came into contact with was his precum and I can’t deny that I love the salty taste. As I gently sucked his head, my hand began to slowly pump his dick.

One of the many things I love about Dylan is that he’s very responsive and isn’t ashamed in letting me know exactly what he liked. Which is why I already knew that one of his favorite things I do when I give him a blowjob is lick his prominent vein on the underside of his cock at the same time that I very lightly and very carefully graze my teeth against his topside. Dylan let out a throaty groan the second I did exactly that and it seemed to light a fire in him because he immediately took control.

My boyfriend pushed himself fully into my mouth until he was hitting the back of my throat and I was gagging around him, only for him to pull away and do the exact same thing again. Dylan was happily fucking my mouth and, to be honest, I didn’t even mind it. The lust was so far deep in my blood that all I could focus on was how sexy he looked as he practically used me as a fuck toy and how damn good he tasted.

I hollowed my mouth around him to create a much tighter environment for him and the filthy sounds of his shameless moans erupting from his chest made my core ache more than it already had. Due to the fast pace and my wet mouth, it didn’t take long for Dylan to reach his much needed release. I hummed when he unloaded and his hot cum shot straight down my throat, his hips bucking in response.

Once Dylan came down from his high, I pulled him out of my mouth and he shuddered at the contact due to how sensitive he’d become. Wiping away the spit on my mouth and any cum spilling down my chin, I stood up with a smirk on my lips and Dylan immediately kissed me. His dominance faltering for the slightest second so he could show me how much he cared for me through the gentle action. However, the moment we parted, dominant Dylan was back.

“Can you sit on the chair for me, babygirl?” He pointed to the chair under his desk he uses to study his lines as he headed over to the small closet.

“Yes, Daddy.” I obeyed because both of us knew that even though he asked, it was actually a question.

My eyes widened immediately when I noticed just what he grabbed from the closet and Dylan approached me with an intense grin on his lips. I wanted to desperately ask him why the hell he had that in his trailer or what he thinks he’s about to do to me with it, but I knew that that wouldn’t be the greatest idea.

“It’s not mine.” Dylan defended himself when he obviously saw my shocked facial expression at the metal handcuffs in his hands. “It’s Stiles’, but I don’t see why we can’t have our own little fun with it. What do you think?”

“Well, I know for a fact Stiles and Lydia have a lot of kinky sex with handcuffs.” I smirked, reaching my arms behind the back of the chair for him to lock them there. “So, I say we should also give it a shot, Daddy.”

“That’s my girl.” Dylan smiled, placing the cold metal around my wrists to lock them behind me.

The next thing my boyfriend did was push my legs apart so I was completely opened for him in a way that felt so dirty and exposing but I loved nonetheless. Dylan’s lips instantly wrapped around one of my breasts, already biting down on my nipple, and I whimpered when I couldn’t grip his hair with my fingers. As he teasingly worked on my breast, Dylan brought a hand up to my core and my hips instinctively bucked the second his middle finger rubbed against my sensitive nub. He started slow at first but as soon as he knew I was ready for more, Dylan picked up his middle finger’s pace and, using his other hand, he slid one of his long fingers inside of me.

I couldn’t hold back my moan at the incredible feeling, considering my body had been craving it for the longest time now, and the first finger was immediately followed by a second. I absolutely loved how much Dylan understood my body and exactly what it needed which is why I was already getting close to my release in a matter of minutes. His skillfull fingers curled inside of me and pumped with such fervor that I didn’t have any ounce of self control in me anymore. I knew I was about to reach my edge and, much to my dismay, so did Dylan.

“Not yet, princess.” He teased and I whined when he removed his fingers from my soaking wet heat. “You only get to cum when I say so. And I want it to happen around my cock.”

After seeing me completely opened for him and a moaning mess just because of his fingers, Dylan’s erection was already back up and ready for more action. Precum glistened on his tip and even though I did give him head only a few moments ago, I already wanted to do it all over again. What can I say? The man has a delicious dick.

Dylan was pumping himself a little bit as he watched my chest rise and fall from my rapid breathing before grabbing my feet and hitching them up on the chair. He pulled my waist towards the edge of the seat, making me lay down since I still was locked to the back of the chair, and Dylan positioned himself in front of my entrance. Without even giving me a warning, he instantly slammed inside of me and my entire body arched at the invasive act. He waited a few seconds for me to adjust and when I sort of did, Dylan began roughly thrusting into me.

“Fuck, babygirl, you’re always so tight.” Dylan moaned, his face snuggled into my slightly sweaty neck.

The pleasurable feeling of his thick width stretching my tight walls as he pounded in me, quite deeply considering how the position we were in favored his ability to be completely buried inside of me, sparked the orgasm I was so close to reach but Dylan denied up to the surface again. I clenched around him once and he growled against my skin, my entire body vibrating with the sound.

“Don’t cum yet.” He demanded and I whimpered.

Even though I tried to hold it back, I clenched around him once more and this time Dylan immediately brought his face up to glare at me. We were so close that I could feel his breath brushing across my skin and, yet, all I could focus on was the bound knot in my stomach ready to break free any minute now. The thought of going against Dylan’s commands was both terrifying and exciting and, to be honest, I didn’t know which one attracted me more.

“Don’t you dare.” Dylan threatened, bringing one of his hands up to forcefully pull my hair and make me look him straight in the eyes. “I’m serious. Promise Daddy you won’t cum until I allow it.”

“I-I promise, Daddy.” I managed to say through moans. However the second his cock twitched inside of me when I said his favorite nickname, I was long gone and there was no way going back.

My entire body shook, my toes curled against the chair and uncontrollable shouts erupted from my chest as one of the greatest orgasms I’ve ever experienced bolted through my veins. I could feel my core clenching around Dylan’s shaft at the same time that it released all of my pent-up arousal and gushed onto him. I screamed so loudly that I was certain everyone on the Teen Wolf lot heard me and I was also sure that despite not following his orders, Dylan was loving the way I was a mess. Everyone including Sprayberry and Cody knew that the person who just made this young woman scream so much in pleasure was Dylan and that it didn’t even matter how badly they might have wanted her, she was his.

My own release triggered Dylan’s and as I was coming down from my intense high, my boyfriend was reaching his. Dylan’s cock twitched before cumming for the second time today and shooting his liquid inside of me, the incredible feeling of his hot cum running against my walls making me moan. The sound of Dylan’s own moans echoed through the trailer and I watched in awe as his face contorted in pure pleasure. He held onto the edges of the chair tightly, his muscles straining against his arms as he shook.

“Strike three.” Dylan managed to say through his husky and breathless voice once he came down from his high.

The sweet taste of adrenaline rushed though all of my veins and my heartbeat pounded so hard it pulsed inside of my ears the second Dylan said those two simple words. A mixture of concern and lust flooded inside of me and I didn’t quite know which one was stronger.

Dylan slowly slid out of my body, his eyes staring into mine the entire time, and I winced at how sensitive I’ve become. Going back over to the closet, Dylan pulled out a small key and walked over to me again. He hovered over my body, his incredible smell filling my nose, and unlocked the metal cuffs on my hands. They immediately dropped to the floor with a clang and Dylan didn’t even seem to care. Putting the key down on his desk, Dylan stood up straight in front of me.

“Let me ask you a question, princess.” He husked. “Do you think you’re a good girl?”

“Yes, Daddy.” I answered, bringing my hands over to settle on my lap. “I do.”

“Hmm, well, I happen to think you’re very very naughty.” Dylan murmured. “And do you know what happens to naughty girls, baby? They get spanked.”

Before I could even put together what was about to happen, Dylan harshly grabbed me and made me stand. My boyfriend pushed me down onto the desk, my ass sticking out for him, and he stuck his leg between mine to keep them apart. He slowly began to caress one of my cheeks with the palm of his hand and goosebumps covered my entire body.

“How many should I give you, babygirl?” Dylan teased. “Does ten sound good?”

“N-No, that’s too much.” I stuttered.

“Okay, then, ten it is.” He chuckled darkly and I mentally prepared myself for what was about to come. “Count for me, princess.”

Suddenly, Dylan lifted his hand and roughly slammed it back down on my ass cheek. The intense pain immediately making my hips bucker in response. The ache and pleasure shooting through me and landed straight in the bottom of my stomach, sparking the creation of a familiar knot.

“O-One.” I whimpered and, as soon as I finished speaking, Dylan spanked my same cheek again. “T-Two.”

He repeatedly smacked my right cheek five times in a row, my skin aching intensely with every hit. Everytime he would slap me, the knot inside of my stomach would become tighter and tighter. I knew that by the time he finished spanking me all ten times, that knot would break and I would be orgasming for the second time in this trailer. I was already a shaking, moaning and whimpering mess in his hands and, as embarrassing as it was to be so vulnerable to someone, I couldn’t care less.

Dylan rubbed my right cheek for a few seconds to ease the stinging pain on my skin before moving to my left and striking my ass again without any warning. My knees were wobbling and weak and if it wasn’t for his leg holding me up, I would’ve definitely fallen down my now.

“S-Six.” I mewled, my voice only able to come out as a whisper whilst he continued his punishment on me. “Seven, Eight, Nine.”

By the tenth strike, the extremely tight knot had snapped and spread an insane amount of pleasure inside of me. My vision blurred and went white as my orgasm dissolved in my blood and bones. My body jerked against the desk, my skin digging into the wood, and arousal immediately spilled out of me and ran down Dylan’s thigh. It didn’t matter that my ass was burning in excruciating agony, the pleasure was so much more powerful.

Dylan held onto my hips as I finished reaching my edge and came back down to Earth. His fingers creating tender circles on my skin.

“You okay, baby?” He asked me and I managed to bring myself back up, with his assistance of course.

“Yes, Dylan, I am.” I turned around with a smile on my face, wrapping my arms around his neck for stability.

“I wasn’t too harsh, was I?”

“No, you were perfect.” I shook my head happily, leaning in to place a soft kiss on his lips.

“Good.” Dylan smiled, his eyes no longer dark and now back to its gentle color. “It’s just, the way Cody looked at you drove me insane and-”

“I know, baby.” I interrupted him before he could finish, caressing the back of his neck with my fingers. “But, I’m not his, I’m yours.”

Dylan smiled at me with everything he had in him and I swooned at how beautiful he was. However, not just in the way he looked or in the way that he always manages to say things that makes me fall in love with him more and more everyday. But, just in the pure way that he is.

Yuri on Ice BD audio commentary translation - Volume 4

I absolutely wanted to post this within today because this evening I want to work on the Pash interview with Sayo Yamamoto… This BD volume has lots of choreography footage so that will take a while to translate, and I’m going to give priority to the interview.

This commentary is different from the others because it’s not just Kubo with another person, there’s 4 of them. Luckily enough they don’t really talk over each other (except for one part, lol), but in the second half I translated most of what they say as dialogue because I felt it was more fitting. In the dialogue parts my notes/comments are in brackets.

The commentary is only for episode 7. Episode 8 has no commentary. It’s not a full translation but I summarized most of what they said, and some parts are almost completely translated. Fans of Phichit, Guang-Hong and Leo should definitely read it as it’s a rare chance to get comments from these voice actors. Also, their reactions to the last scene are hilarious, that’s a must read too.

The commentary is by:
-Mitsurou Kubo
-Kenshou Ono (Phichit)
-Yuutarou Honjou (Guang-Hong)
-Shunichi Toki (Leo)

Translation under the cut because it’s long. Enjoy!


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Sokovian cuddles

Anon request:

Hi there! I’m in love with your blog, and I know that there are a lot of specifically Pietro blogs, but I love your style, so I was wondering if you could do something of Pietro? Maybe it’s movie night and the reader never told anybody she liked to cuddle but Pietro kinda offers and he can’t stop staring at her and saying cute things then they fall asleep together all tangled. Idk I just need FLUFF!


A/N: I’ve changed the ‘never told anybody she liked to cuddle’ to ‘haven’t been cuddled for ages’ - I hope you still like it?


Word count: 1.4k


Warnings: none, this is pure sweet fluff.

Originally posted by deanimagines67



Another movie night, another rom-com on the agenda. How delightful, You thought to yourself. Everyone around you is either loved up or is having a casual friends-with-benefits arrangement. Meanwhile you’re stuck in the Avengers Tower, the rarest creature of them all - a singleton.

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The key to love, my father told me, was to never love someone more than they love you. So when, after dating for five months, Christopher Moore was the first to say “I Love You”, I thought I had hit the “Love Jackpot”. I say this because, prior to him saying it at that very moment, I had never given thought to the possibility that I could love him in return. Standing in front of my apartment building, nervous and excited, facing him and his smile, I questioned whether love was the word to describe what I was feeling. High school love, after all, is quite trivial with it’s ins and outs. Nevertheless after weighing the theoretical pros and cons of love, I decided that I was in love, at least in some respects. He was handsome, smart, sweet, and I enjoyed his company. This is what I believed love boiled down to; four factors. Honesty, clearly, was something I overlooked. About a year and 7 months into our blissful love affair, after graduation had passed and we had spent the summer taking all the cliché couple pictures, Chris decided that he “just couldn’t go on lying to me anymore. “Jenine” he told me “this guilt is eating me alive!”. I imagine there wasn’t much of him left, as it had been “eating away at him” for 6 months. This is when I learned that there is no “key” to love; no guide, no tips, no 101 course, because love is lived and learned; never taught. Try as you may, to forgo the pain of love, you’ll find joy in knowing that it’s survive-able and moreover, sometimes the good outweighs the bad. No, Chris wasn’t the love of my life, but he gave life to my ability to love.

“Never” my father said “let love override your faculty of reason.” Easier said, than done. My next love was Jeremy Bishop. Before you ask, of course there were others between Chris and Jeremy. But this is a story about love; not “almost loves”,“semi loves”, and “could’ve beens”. Jeremy’s love was the worst kind of love. The kind that doesn’t have a reason to exist but somehow it does and you’re glad. Its sole purpose is to debilitate your mind, forcing you to follow only your emotions. While Jeremy was dreamy, I learned that the man of your dreams can sometimes be the root of your nightmares.

I met Jeremy my junior year at _________ University. It was a Sunday and I had been studying in the library for an anthropology midterm and decided that I would take a break. Putting my highlighter down & flexing my hand I stood up & headed towards the bathroom. As I walked through the stacks, passing my hand across the rows of books I’d never read, my friend Denise spotted me and waved me over. Walking swiftly I made my way to the table she was stationed it & gathered that she had been studying all day as all. Splayed papers, open textbooks, two highlighters, & her laptop with several window open screamed “cram session” to me. After having sat & talked for some time about school & it’s “scammagry”, I noticed that someone had taken a seat at the end of the table. You know those typical movies where two people look up at the same time & smile coyly at one another? Well that’s what happened with us…….minus the smiling. When Jeremy & I caught eyes it was more of an inquisitive stare down. I relented because who really stares at a stranger for lengths at a time? Apparently Jeremy does because every time I looked up he was looking at me or perhaps through me. Whatever the case was I asked Denise if she could “Excuse me for one second?” as I got up from my seat and sauntered over to Jeremy, running my fingernails along the wooden table that both separated and joined us.

He was brown skinned but it was a rich brown that I often found myself lost in. He had brown hair that was cut low to avoid maintenance & also to spite his mother who so much loved it longer. His eyes were almost black they were so dark, yet you never asked someone to hit the lights when staring into them. He had a slight dimple on the right side of face that only presented itself in the presence of his mother, its creator.

“I know you or something?” I said, to which he looked up & responded “No you don’t. But since you’re already here, I’m Jeremy. Nice to meet you….” he said moving his hand in that circular waiting motion “this is usually the part where you tell me your name”. He was sarcastic & forthcoming and I liked it. “This is usually the part when I’d say Jenine. My name is Jenine. Though I’m not sure it’s nice to meet you.” “Well Jenine, do you have HIST 256 on Mondays & Thursdays? I think that’s where I’ve seen you before.” “Well Jeremy, had I known you were a stalker I would’ve stayed at the other end of the table” “A stalker Jenine? Really? I think you’re mistaking my keen eye for details.” “I stand corrected then. I just had no idea I was noticeable to your "keen eye”, I said, making air quotes. He leaned in & said, “Maybe Jenine, just maybe there’s a lot of things you don’t know. I’d be happy to fill you in though. If you were ever free.” “Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems to me, Jeremy, that you’re asking me out.” “It seems that way, because it is that way. But enough with this, would you be interested in going out?” “I’ll contemplate it.”

A week later Jeremy picked me up in his beat up silver 2010 Toyota Corolla. Got out & offered to close the door for me not because he was a gentleman but because I literally couldn’t close it myself. He told me he wanted to show me his favorite place in all of Brooklyn. We drove for about 15 mins and parked in DUMBO; my favorite place. As we walked to the pier he barraged me with every menial question from favorite color to top five movies. I stopped his questioning because I realized I knew nothing about him. “What about you?” I said. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.” “I’m a Taurus. Now back to you.” “Your sign. You gave me the third degree and in return you tell me your astrological sign??” “I’m really not that interesting. I kind of just go with the flow nothing special really.” “I could say the same about myself but you don’t see me spewing monotonous facts about myself” “That’s just it though. You’re very interesting. I see you twice a week & you never look the same to me. Always a different hairstyle, new lipstick, different outfit. You keep me guessing & well…I like that.” “Different outfit…Did you expect me to have the same clothes on like a cartoon character?”

Jeremy took my clothes off the way he took down my walls; slowly & intently. I never felt exposed or vulnerable. It was easy with him & who doesn’t like easy? The first time we had sex he kissed every scar and stretch mark on my body while he whispered beautiful and for the first time I believed it. This is when I knew I loved him; this is when I knew he loved me. We fell into a routine & inevitably, that’s how we fell apart. We saw each other four-five times a week in between work, school & our respective friends. I’d meet him after work or he’d meet me after class, we’d get some food or I’d cook, we’d talk, then go back to his dorm room or my house & somewhere in between there we’d fuck once or twice & that would be that. Talk, Eat, Fuck, Repeat. This, I should inform you, was the foundation for our dismantling. Jeremy grew tired of our monotony, I suppose, & because of that he started talking to a female customer who had “just so happened” to frequent his job. In talking they “just so happened” to find they had “so much in common” & somehow Jeremy’s dick “just so happened” to be in her mouth when I walked into his dorm room to get the spare phone charger I left there just in case. “Oh Mahh Gahhhh” is what Celeste said with his dick slighty tucked to the left side of her mouth because it wouldn’t have been polite to pull it out all together; though I’m sure there was no God she could ever call her own. Startled yet surprisingly indifferent I found my charger in the first drawer of his night stand now decoratively arrayed with ripped condom wrappers and I closed the door behind me.

Walking out of the apartment I didn’t feel anything but when I reached the stairs it hit me and when Jeremy came running out of his room, pulling his boxers up I looked up at him from the top stair I was sitting on & hit him right in the groin. “Shit! Ahh! Damn, J! Come on!” he winced . “Come on?? Excuse me?!? You’re such a fucking dickhead. Like what the fuck?” “I know. I know. I’m sorry babe. You gotta believe me! I swear it’ll never happen again.” & that’s what I wanted to believe after all; that this was just a bump along our road; that we could get through this because we could get through anything. So when Jeremy crouched down in front of me, put his hand under my chin, looked me right in the eye and told me he was “so sorry”, that he “really loved me”, that he was “mad stupid for doing that” I believed him & gave us another chance because I wasn’t ready to admit failure.

Celeste Soto was the average full figured broad who just “couldn’t help” falling for other women’s boyfriends, husbands, fiancés, you name it. Walking back into his room, I found her putting her left shoe on with one hand on his desk for balance. “You gotta believe mama” she said “I didn’t know he even had a girl. You feel me? I wouldn’t have done anything with him. Thas crazy disrespectful. My bad.” as she adjusted her bra strap and pulled her hair into a messy bun. Turning slighty towards Jeremy, I looked at him as if to say “really?!? THIS was the best you could do??” and he lowered his head, and stared at this one spot on the carpet that he could never get out. Not only had Jeremy cheated but he chose the lowest of women to do it with. “First of all, I’m not one of your friends so I don’t know why you’re calling me "mama” & no I don’t “feel” you nor do I intend to. Get your shit and get out!“ When she was gone I searched the apartment for remnants of her presence, prior to that days visit. An earring, a hair tie, maybe a lip balm. I found nothing or maybe I wasn’t really looking.

For eight months straight Jeremy was on his BEST behavior. He’d let me know where he was at all times as to ensure that he wasn’t out cheating; send pictures as proof on some occasions. I have to admit, though I was secure in his whereabouts, I was also sure that this was not how healthy relationships works. Nevertheless I looked forward to each notification because afterall "once a cheater……"you know the rest. One night I went over to his place to cook dinner, partially to ensure he wouldn’t be feeding Celeste or any other girl his penis but also because this is what I missed most about us. I had become so preoccupied with deciding whether or not I could trust him that I wasn’t concerned with trying to make us seem normal. After dinner we were in his bed tearing at each other’s clothes & after switching positions five times he looked down at me & said "I can’t do this”. Looking back at him I said “it’s cool I wasn’t feeling it either honestly”. “Not this” he said falling to my side, facing the ceiling “I mean like this….us”. Somehow though I knew that was what he had meant. This ball of something akin to both fear & anger welled up in my throat & grew until finally all I could say was “oh”. One tear fell from my eye & couldn’t allow myself to shed another. “This whole time” he said getting up from the bed “I wasn’t with you because I wanted to be. I was with you because I didn’t want to let you down.” He was pacing back & front at the foot of the bed, lifting his hands to his head then retracting them, looking over at me occasionally for assurance of my understanding. So he continued "I couldn’t let your last image of me be somebody who betrayed you. I had to prove you wrong & that’s selfish. I’m sorry. I don’t want to be in a relationship I’m not fully committed to. It isn’t fair to either of us J & you can hate me but I’d rather you hate me for being honest.” “Is this a joke? Please tell me you’re kidding right now” I said, half laughing half crying. “Let me get this straight” I said, sitting upright in his bed, pulling my shirt over my head “You cheated…..You lied…..YOU fucked up….You begged for another chance!…and my stupid ass gave you one. I’m just so lost right now.” This is when I realized I never should have sat on those steps & cried. I should’ve ran out of that building like it was on fire because guys like him will always burn you.

Some nights I could still hear his footsteps pacing the floor & I’d wonder when in the hell it would be over. When I’d stop crying; when I’d realize I was better off without him. But there’s this moment & I know it sounds cliche but you just wake up & you feel different you feel like you can begin again. One morning I woke up and knew Jeremy would never have a hold on me the way he did before, but more importantly I didn’t want him to.

The thing about baggage is that you never realize how much of it you carry around. In fact you assume that more often than not you don’t carry any at all because you’re “over it” or you’ve “moved on”. You’ll find yourself compromising because you just want someone to call at night; that wants only you. “Trust me.” my mother said “There will be others and don’t think that you have to look for them or that you have to settle.” My mother had a way with words. I’m not sure if that’s necessarily a good thing but the fact remains that when she said those words to me I wished she had kept her opinion to herself. I would never settle…..or at least I didn’t think I would.

I knew I didn’t love Benjamin the first time he came inside me & I wished I had never come to his apartment, let alone into his room splayed with dirty laundry that he was “gonna get to”. More importantly I knew I couldn’t love Benjamin, not the way I wanted to at least, when he told me I’m just like my mother. This sounds stupid I know, but let me explain.

After a week of working overtime, my best friend Selene dragged me out of my apartment for a night of bar hopping. Upon walking into our third stop, Benjamin grabbed my hand & told me I was pretty. That was it. There was no drawn out conversation, no playing hard to get, it was very low stakes. I gave him my number & before I got to the next bar he had called & asked when he could see me again. “Tomorrow” I said.

The next evening Benjamin showed up at my apartment with no plan other than to show up. We decided to see a movie.

The movie we saw doesn’t matter. Neither does the fact that we went to the movies. What matters is that after we left the movies, Benjamin grabbed both my hands & kissed me. When he stopped & I looked up at him he said “You taste like stale popcorn”. I thought “what the fuck?” & then he reminded me that we shared a popcorn. Our entirely relationship was like this; constant reminders of things I should have been aware of.

Ben was different from Jeremy because he never lied to me. That doesn’t necessarily mean that’s a good thing though. His honesty was one that I had to grow accustomed to. We had been dating for about two months, when I called him asking if he wanted to get dinner later & he simply replied “no”. No explanation, no rain check, no apology; he just hung up. Later he’d text me & say that we should get breakfast instead the next day because he liked being the first person I talked to in the morning. He never hid anything from me. Girls would text him, telling him how much they “missed him” how much “fun” they used to have & he’d show me his phone while laughing & ask what I thought he should say in his reply. It was almost inconceivable, how much he included me in his decisions when it came to other women. Co-workers would invite him out to dinner & drinks after work, over to their apartments, concerts & he would ask me, not if he could go (because he was going to do what he wanted regardless) or if I wanted to come with, but how I’d feel if he went it with them. We’d be waiting for our heart rates to drop back to normal after sex; our skin still dewy and tingling and he’d say “the last time was better” or “you faked it, but that’s cool” as he got up and ambled to the bathroom & I’d wonder if he had to be so honest with me all the time.

I woke up one day to him sitting at my kitchen table in just some sweatpants, signing a card. Next to him there was a huge bouquet of sunflowers. I walked over to him, fixing my bed hair into a bed bun & when I sat down he was startled. “I didn’t think you’d be up this early” he said & I looked over at the clock on microwave. “It’s after 11……does that even count as early?” I said. He looked up at me, then at the clock, then back at me & shrugged “I guess not”. I asked “Who’s the card for?” & as he sealed it, he handed to me & said “Happy Anniversary Sweetness” with no inflection. My face dropped to the floor, along with the card. “An anniversary?” I thought “have we really been dating a year? Maybe it’s like a six month anniversary? But that’s not even an anniversary!” After a few mental “Fuck!!”’s, I pulled myself together, awkwardly smiled as I picked up the card & opened it. It had been a year since I moved into my own place. In the card he wrote about how happy he was for me; that he knew how big of a deal it was for me to live on my own & he wanted me to know that it was just as important to him. I cried out of relief. He thought I was overwhelmed by his thoughtfulness, primarily because as I closed the card, hugged him, wiped my tears and sniffled into his neck, I whispered “Thank you. This means a lot.”. One year of independence; something I should have been aware of.

The first time he told me he loved me, I opened my mouth to respond & he placed his index finger on my parted lips. “Stop” he said. “Not everything I say deserves or should be met with a response Jenine. I love you. That’s it.” I of course flew into defense. “So I can’t say it back? I can’t love you in return? What kind of bullshit is that Ben? You can’t just say something like that & expect me not to say anything back.” “I never said you can’t say anything back. But think about it baby, I said I love you & your first instinct was to respond. You didn’t even really take the moment in. That’s what I’m saying. I don’t want you to love me back because I love you. I want you to love me because you actually love me.” I felt little, like a child, like I had been put in my place, handled, dealt with, but I wouldn’t let him know. “You’re such an asshole sometimes” I said “but that Benjamin, for your information, is why I love you. Because you’re only an asshole sometimes”.

There are two important things I remember from when I broke up with Ben:

1. It was raining.
2. He told me I should’ve ended us a long time ago.

I came back to the apartment from the gym. As I shook my umbrella walking through the door, Ben sauntered by in his usual attire, house sweats and no shirt, saying “You must love mopping.” in a condescending tone. I happily returned the tone saying “Definitely. I just love it! Can’t get enough.” as I rolled my eyes and the umbrella up, fastening it shut. I walked over to the kitchen & checked the fridge. All that was left was this chicken Parmesan “thing” I had attempted to make three days earlier & it looked like a big pile of mush at that point. I chucked it & decided that take out sounded good. I had a taste for some pad thai so the choice was easy. Picking up my phone & dialing the number I thought it might be a good idea to ask Ben what he wanted but I figured he’d eat whatever I ordered him. So I made the call, ordered Chicken Pad Thai and another peanut sauce dish with shrimp, and hung up. As soon as my phone had ended the call, Benjamin started an argument. “Why would you order food without asking me what I wanted?” he asked me walking out of the bedroom and I replied “I ordered food for us both. No need to say thank you”. He walked towards the window to look out but really it was all dramatics because our window looks directly at the alley behind our building that holds nothing but two dumpsters and a few forgotten cats. “Why would I say thank you to you for doing something I never asked you to do?” he said with his back turned to me “Sometimes” he scoffed, almost laughing, as he looked at the rain collect in the window sill. “Sometimes I don’t get you. Like after all this time you still do shit that irritates me and I wonder why the fuck I still want to lay next to you at night or wake up with you in the morning.” I was sitting on the sofa, absentmindedly playing with the tag on this pillow I bought two years before when he & I had just started dating. He told me the pattern on it reminded him of us; that the lines never intersected. They just changed direction. “Nobody is holding you here Ben. You can leave anytime you’d like.” I said as I picked up the remote & turned on the television.

Thirty-five minutes later I was annoyed that the food hadn’t arrived but also because Ben never left the window. He just stayed there staring at the rain while it sheeted down the window screen and when thunder roared he’d just sigh. “What could be taking this food so long? The place isn’t even that far.” I complained. “It’s the rain Jenine. Everything slows when it rains. People, cars, buses, trains, bikes, they all slow.” He paused “You also might want to factor in the idea that a bunch of people order take out on a night like this.” I answered back “I knew that!……why are you always telling me things as if I don’t know them? As if I’m not aware? It’s just annoying. You’re annoying.” Ben walked away from the window & towards the kitchen counter. He planted his two hands palm down on the counter, hoisted himself up to sit on it, looked at me & said “Maybe it’s not me that annoys you Jenine. Maybe you can’t admit that I’m ever fucking right! I can’t ever make a point without you saying “I knew that!”. If you knew it Jenine…..then why would you say half the shit you say or do half the shit you do.“ I paused the lifetime movie I had been somehow become invested in and pressed a metaphorical "play” on the scene that was unfolding in our living room. “I don’t know Ben. Maybe you’re right” I replied as I sat up, crossed my legs and interlaced my fingers over my knee. “Maybe I can’t handle the fact that you make valid points. Or perhaps it’s the fact that you can’t ever let me be wrong without making me look like a complete ass. You’re always so philosophical. "Oh thee "all knowing Ben!” Ohh he who knows more than anyone!“ I mocked. "It’s insulting. For someone who is just so wise you damn sure don’t know how to do your own fucking laundry, or wash a dish, or aim your penis directly into the bowl when you pee. Stop with the bullshit. We both have our faults.” My phone rang. The food was downstairs.

I threw on my worn out flip flops and shuffled down the 3 flights of stairs. Walking back into the apartment with food in hand, I saw that Ben had returned to the window. He walked over to the kitchen counter where I was standing, taking the food out of the brown paper bag & said “You said your ordered me food.” “I just ordered two things off the menu. I figured we’d just share.” I reasoned. “Right I get that but I don’t like peanuts. You know that. Don’t you? I’ve told you this. I’m sure I have as we’ve been together give or take I don’t know 2 & half years!” “Dammit! I whispered to myself. "I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking & I was hungry & I’m…..sorry. I’m just sorry.” “It’s fine” he said. “I should’ve just picked something up on the way home. It isn’t the first time you’ve done something like this. You’re like your mother in that way.” “Like my mother? All of this over some take out? Listen, good luck with dinner.” I said as I grabbed a plastic fork at the bottom of the bag & headed back to the sofa. “Yeah, like your mother.” he continued, following me. “You’re always complaining that she never listens to you; that you have to remind her of things you’ve already told her. Yet, here you are never listening to me. It’s not even about the apology. It’s that I just don’t think you’re really sorry at all.” he retorted. “Fair enough.” I said, putting my food down on the coffee table. “You wanna know what I’m really sorry about Ben? Huh? Fine. I’m sorry I moved in with you. I’m sorry I’ve been in this relationship for this long because we’ll never be good enough for one another. You know that right? We’re always going to be like this Ben.” I said, pointing at the pace between with both hands. “It’s never going to be enough that we love each other. There’s gotta be more to love than whatever the fuck we’re doing. I just don’t think this is healthy. I don’t think we’re growing here. Do you?”. “Now that J…that’s the most honest thing you’ve said to me. You’re always saying what you think I want to hear and that’s my problem with you. You never say what the hell you want because you think too much about it. We are growing, it’s just apart from one another.” He sighed, finally saying “Look, I’m tired.” as he walked exhaustedly back towards the bedroom, on an empty stomach & closed the door behind him. I couldn’t figure out if he meant he was tired of us, of the arguing, of never really getting back to how we were or if he was honestly tired.

I slept on the sofa & I use the term “slept” very lightly. What I really did was stare at the ceiling, trying to figure out if this was really it for Ben & I. If that was our last real conversation; if that even counted as a conversation. I planned out what I’d say in the morning after we’d both had time to think & reflect. I’d tell him I was sorry about going off & that it’s not that I don’t want to try to make it work but that I don’t even think trying is worth an actual try. I thought about it & felt like the whole relationship was a perpetual “try”. We’d just kept getting up, dusting each other off, & holding hands until we’d fall again thinking it didn’t matter because we’d fallen together. How many times do you have to fall before you realize that perhaps it isn’t the ground that’s tripping you up? That it might just be you. Do you have to scrape your knees a few times or fall flat on your face? How do you know when you’ve had enough?

I laid there falling in & out of sleep. I had this weird dream that I was baking a cake. I kept checking on it. Ben was there but he didn’t really say much. Finally I took it out of the oven & it was burnt around the edges. He shuffled over to the stovetop & looked at the cake with a somber face. “I told you it was done 10 minutes ago. You should’ve taken it out.” he said & I just stared at him blankly because he was right. I turned the pan over and the cake popped out. I let it cool, frosted it and cut a piece. Jeremy hunched over the counter top and watched me put the cake on a plate with confusion. “You’re just going to eat a burnt cake?” he questioned me. I had just taken my first bite and was going in for a second when I looked up at him and said “It still tastes good so what’s the difference?”. “The difference, Jenine, is that you know the whole cake doesn’t taste good. Only certain parts do. Why don’t you just throw it out and make another one?” he said walking over to the cake, lifting the plate up at different points and angles to get a good look at it. It was as though he was wondering how the frosting did anything but make the cake look even sadder. I licked the last bit of frosting off my fork and said “Because, burnt or not burnt, I still love cake.”

I woke up to a sliver of sunlight shining through the living room across the floor & stopping right at the front door. I sat up & checked the time. It was 7:06. I decided I’d go to the bedroom and get some real rest. I stood up & stumbled towards the bedroom. As soon as I reached the door, Ben was coming out of the room. He was dressed & had 2 bags with him not including the backpack he’d never leave the house without. All of the things I had planned on saying were forgotten. I could barely see straight, let alone gather the words I wanted to say. He looked at me then said “Sorry. Can I just get by?”. “Sure!” I blurted out as I moved to the left, almost jumping. He walked towards the front door & I asked “Umm can at least ask where you’re going?”. He stopped moving and turned, telling me “I thought about what you said J. About us not being enough for one another. I guess I just always thought it would work itself out. But I see what you mean. I don’t know the exact moment when you came to that conclusion, or maybe you decided it, but you should’ve ended us then instead of now. So I’m leaving. I guess I’ll pick up the rest of my stuff over the next couple of weeks.”. That’s it. He was gone. Whatever he had left, the “stuff” he mentioned, was never picked up. They were minuscule items really; a toothbrush, some body wash, a value pack of razors. Things that made you think of him, even though they were all replaceable. It didn’t take long for me to realize that much like the burnt cake, I still loved Ben.

To be continued or whatever…….