those are the same things right

sparklehoard  asked:

How you ever done a dinosaur drawing tutorial? Not enough of those on here and the way you draw them is really good!

They are a struggle and I spent 2 months or so studying and drawing birds in order to get him looking a bit right, to draw anything you just do the same; study and draw that thing for a while

anonymous asked:

Hi! I recently realised I'm on the ace aro spectrum, after my parents' annual interrogation about why I still didn't have a boyfriend got me thinking why indeed. It feels so right, but is also a strange thing to wrap your head around, especially since I don't know anyone else who identifies as aro ace. A part of me feels like I don't have the right to declare as those without having tried sex/romantic relationships. Have you or your followers ever felt that and what are your thoughts on it? Thx!

Hey there Anon!

So you basically just described me.  Seriously.  Before discovering asexuality I questioned myself constantly about why I didn’t have a boyfriend.  I even tried thinking, “okay, maybe I’m a lesbian?” but that didn’t feel right either.  Eventually I discovered that asexuality was a thing thanks to a post here and tumblr, and my life hasn’t been the same since.

I have never experienced a romantic relationship, nor have I had sex.  I’m going to be 30 years old this summer and none of those things have happened.  However just because I haven’t experienced it to know for sure, doesn’t mean that I can’t identify as asexual and aromantic.  It just means that I know myself and that if things change down the line, then I change with them.  Sexual identity is probably one of the most difficult things we have to figure out ourselves, because while we can read other people’s accounts of how they came to the conclusion that they’re asexual or bisexual or pansexual (etc.), only WE can decide what we are.  Only WE know what’s going on inside our bodies and minds.

~Mod Elise

anonymous asked:

I find it fucking disgusting how non romanians are saying Seb should've commented earlier on the situation with his home country, they have no fucking clue what's going on. The same fucking people that made xenophobic comments towards him when they found out he was eastern european, which btw xenophobia is probs something he's dealt with since he was a child because romanians get treated badly in other countries.

Before I respond with the words I want to say:

Originally posted by moviesandquotes

You know why they fucking whined about him not responding “early enough”? Because there’s not a damned thing he can do right for them. That’s why. They rage on about the people who actually agree with his actions, saying those fans are up his ass (who wouldn’t fucking want to be at least grabbing that ass) and that those fans think he’s perfect. But THEY are the ones who set these inhuman standards for him to meet lest he be burned at the fucking stake over it. THEY are the ones expecting him to be perfect or at least “right” in their eyes and fuck the rest of the people who think he’s doing just fine for a human. Thing is, guess who wouldn’t even meet their own standards? THEM. They can’t even pause in a god damned mirror and look at their own lives long enough to figure out that maybe they’ve failed a fucking time or two.

Hell, I started this blog today and I’ve already made an error that I had to correct. We ALL make mistakes and we all do things that may not please others, but it’s our own fucking life to live and damn it if I’m not willing to let Sebastian live his own fucking life, too. If he wants me, though, I’m here.

GRADE(for the non-Romanians thinking they have a damned thing to say when they don’t even know wtf is going on over there) D- god I hate politics and the rantings of people who are too busy on here complaining about a celebrity’s actions to go out and make a difference in their community.

anonymous asked:

Itaat to not like stepping on the cracks of the sidewalk? Awhile ago I saw someone with OCD say they avoid the cracks, but I don't feel compulsed to do so nor do I think anything bad is going to happen if I don't, it just feels kind of wrong to step on them. I've also seen that some autistic people don't like certain foods touching because they see it as wrong and i was wondering if this is kind of the same thing?

Autistics tend to have a very strong sense of right and wrong. Not just in a morality sense but with regards to how things should be. It sounds like this may be one of those things for you. For instance, I have to eat my food in a very specific way. I have to eat the first bite on the right side of my mouth and the second on the left with both bites being equal. I don’t think anything bad will happen if I don’t do this, but it feels like this is the “right” way to eat and that any other way is just “wrong.” It sounds like not stepping on the cracks is a similar thing for you. 


I feel like so many people don’t understand why saying things like “Why does everything have to be about race?” is harmful. People have been saying that shit since the very beginning of the civil rights movement. And they can fuck off, because it is about race. Without putting race into the equation, you can never truly solve the problems. Every movement starts with people understanding their oppression. But those white people never truly believe that race isn’t a factor, they’d just like to believe it. A massive amount of willful ignorance goes into believing that unarmed black people were killed not because of the color of their skin, but because of any other obscure improbable cause. By erasing the idea of race, you erase any hope of change, and in some way a lot of people want that, even if they don’t know it. And that’s where I think “AllLivesMatter” comes from. White people get to live in a sort of ignorant euphoria where they “don’t see color” and “we’re all one race,” and they don’t want that fragile illusion to be broken down.

Shit people have forgotten about the Bush Era:
  • Free Speech Zones, which were a real thing and not a plot element in a particularly ham-handed dystopian novel.
  • The phrase “hidey hole.”
  • Watching a budget surplus become a massive deficit that was bigger than it even looked because the White House was just like, “Okay, we’ll just not put the wars on the books and just ask for more money for those every few months.”
  • The sheer number of times Alberto Gonzalez said, “I don’t recall,” to Congress regarding war crimes and human rights violations.
  • “…now watch this drive.”
  • Mission Accomplished.
  • “The absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence,” “yellowcake uranium,” Condoleeza’s “mushroom clouds” fearmongering, and all the other bullshit we were fed to get into Iraq.
  • The President of the United States said so many stupid things that there were one-a-day calendars consisting of an individual quote for each day of the year. They didn’t all have the exact same quotes.

Some clarifications because last night was a whirlwind and I’ve had more time to process the episode as a whole.  I reference this post specifically because there’s things that I want to clear up from yesterday that I was very in the moment about.  I think what gets us at times when trying to read deeper into anything from an anime is the fact that it’s a translation.  You never get the same feelings as you do when it’s in Japanese.  This is if you don’t know Japanese but if you do then I wish I got those same nuances in grammar that you do.

This scene is so important to episode 9.  Yuuri’s down in the dumps right now even if he was able to just squeeze into the Grand Prix Final.  But Yuuri is where he is because of his ability and he gave two amazing performances at the Cup of China that gave him the second place finish he would need to beat out Mickey.  Yuuri wants Viktor to step down as his coach after all of this.  To this moment he’s still doesn’t really think that he deserves Viktor.  But Yuri comes in out of nowhere and kicks him.  He breaks his train of thought.  This is the shock that Yuuri needed to find the confidence to ask Viktor “to stay as his coach until he retires”.  I don’t think that he intended to do that at all, but he came at just the right time and with his grandpa’s new katsudon pirozhki.

If we can all just please forget the fact that I actually thought Viktor flew back to Russia with a dog that almost died 24 hours ago after swallowing steamed buns then I’d love it.  Okay, but you know he would fly back to Russia if necessary.

I want to comment on Viktor’s face again.  Yes, this is a man who is very physically and emotionally tired.  The moment that he found out that Makkachin would be okay he started to worry about Yuuri.  You know he did.  This is character growth at its’ finest.  This is a man who hadn’t thought about anyone but himself, his skating career, and his dog.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  We see those bits of Yuuri bleed over into Viktor as their relationship deepens.  Viktor is worrying about someone who isn’t himself.  You could see the frustration in his expressions from episode 8 when he finds out that Makkachin’s at the vet.  He doesn’t want to leave Yuuri but in the end he does because Yuuri tells him that he’ll do the free skate by himself.  He’s probably been worried about how Yuuri coped without him on the sidelines because this is the first time in a major competition since he’s become his coach that he hasn’t been there.  He knows how it all went.  I’m sure he saw the stream.  He’s proud of Yuuri, but he understands Yuuri and the comfort that he craves.   He needs to see how Yuuri is doing for himself at the train station.  He’s deep in thought of the future until Makkachin barks to tell him that Yuuri’s here.

I was torn on this last night but I’m certain now that these two are on the same page.  We don’t know what the future holds for these two.  Yuuri might have just been outside next to a highway in Russia thinking about retiring after this season, but that doesn’t mean he’ll stop skating here.  He could keep going.  The show has actually given us indicators that Viktor’s the only one retiring at the end of all this between Yakov, Yuri, and JJ (mostly just saying that Viktor was running from him, but that’s close enough to retiring).  So, this request comes from a Yuuri that finally understands Viktor and is professing his love.  There’s no hesitations anymore.  The build-up to this moment was done phenomenally.  It’s a roundabout way of doing things but he does practically propose right here.  

The tears that come out of him after this are of happiness.  “I wish you’d never retire” is exactly what Yuuri wants to hear.  Yuuri’s spent 8 episodes unsure if Viktor would stay with him when all of this is said and done.  But he gets that confirmation.  Yuuri needs to hear it from Viktor’s own mouth.  Viktor is also practically confirming the end of his skating career here because he doesn’t want Yuuri to retire.  He’s 27 years old and already stands at the top of the world.  He’s been thinking about what he wants to do in the future as Yuuri’s coach.  He’ll end his career on a really strong note.  Now, he wants to be Yuuri’s coach and his future.  They’ll go to grand prix final after grand prix final together for as long as Yuuri is willing to skate competitively.  And then after all of that, they’ll be together.  I’m really hoping that we get a sweet ending to all of this.

Guys, the full version of Yuri on Ice’s ED “You Only Live Once” is now out and the lyrics in the second part are rather… romantic?

You’re amazing
We lose our words
Even if you run out of strength
Everybody knows you’re right
You are too beautiful

When you’re sad and have a hard time
We believe in you
Oh I’m just dreaming of the day
When all the days until this moment will resound until they are compensated
Thunderous applause
We were born to shine
Shining brightly
That’s what you told me

I mean, I’m sure there’s a platonic reading to it as well, but I think we’re all seeing the same thing here, right? (especially paired with those domestic moments in the ED) Interpretations, go!

(Translation by me, please correct me if anything is wrong.)

A Very Marauders Christmas List
  • One large tree
  • One smaller tree for when Mcgonagall finds a full sized tree in your bedroom. 
  • One package of assorted cheeses for Peter.
  • One more package of assorted cheeses after James leaves it by the fireplace.
  • One pair of deer antlers for Lily.
  • One roll of spell o tap for James’s mouth after a week of reindeer puns.
  • Matching sweaters for Dorcus and Marlene.
  • A pair of scissors for Marlene to turn her sweater into a crop top. 
  • One hand knit scarf for Remus. (Made by one Sirius Black) 
  • Two pairs of condoms from James to Sirius. 
  • Two pairs of condoms from Sirius to James
  • Two bros having a broment because they each bought each other the same thing. 
  • Six attempts to get Alice and Frank under mistletoe.
  • One hilarious prank unraveled right in front of Sinus from Remus. 
  • 5 weeks of detention
  • 4 calling birds
  • 3 french hens
  • 2 turtle doves
  • 1 angry Lily wondering how the hell James thought buying her all those birds was a good idea. 
  • 9 wizards and witches having a very Merry Christmas. 

The Curse of Limbo: Nightingale

I hate that I did not know how to love you. I hate how we ended. I hate that we’re no longer talking. I hate myself for how I treated you. I hate that I called you a bitch that one time when we were downtown. I really screwed things up between us, didn’t I? You know something? I messed you up in the head, I did. But I fucked myself over too. Drugs come easy when you’re trying to forget. When you put so much into someone and left with so little of your own thoughts… that doesn’t even begin to define lost… I’m no longer in love with you, but I still write about you– it’s about the same thing, right? Did those years have meaning? Your sister in law once said to me that in a relationship– one person always loves the other person more. She said that I was the one to love too hard. Was I wrong? I still hold you pretty high. You forgive. You give my tears a stop sign. I realized a few things since you’ve been gone. It’s not love just because two people say I love you to one another. It’s not love just because there was passion. It’s not love just because it hurts. It’s not love just because we can hold it while it’s broken. It’s not love just because your parents didn’t accept us. It’s not love just because we accepted us. It’s not love just because you got me into poetry. It’s not love just because I still miss you. It’s not love just because I still love you. It’s not love just because all of the plans we’ve made. It’s not love. It’s not love. But at the time?

it was all I ever knew about love.


God I’ve spent enough time on this now. Painting is one of those things where I never feel like I actually finish it… like you could go on forever refining things and adding details. Anyway, this is like semi visually metaphorical and semi literal.

So I’ve kind of talked about this before with this one but I really like the idea that Mob grows into being a leader, not intentionally and not without a great deal of awkwardness, but because he does the right thing for the right reasons regardless of what everyone else is doing. So quite by accident, much in the same way he accidentally became a shadow leader, he finds himself becoming a central figure in keeping the order, a balance point for all the people that try to do wrong. And I love the idea of the other three, all of which are much more naturally inclined to be leaders, deferring to Mob and happily being a part of his inner circle (even Ritsu, he’s smiling on the the inside). Though Mob insists there isn’t an inner circle because there isn’t… whatever this is.

Ahhhhh, i would love to talk more about them like this, but I won’t do it in this post.

cold weather survival tips so y’all can start the new year with soft glowy skin

I posted a list of beauty tips for hot weather on my old blog at the beginning of the summer and it went over really well, so I thought I’d do a cold weather version now that we’re in peak chapped-lips-and-cracked-hands season.

  • Do yourself a favor by going to the nearest drugstore and buying the biggest tub of Vaseline/petroleum jelly you can find. 90% of Dry Skin Problems™ can be solved by slapping some Vaseline on there. 
  • Seriously. Chapped lips? Use Vaseline as a lip balm. Dry, cracked heels? Slather those feetsies with Vaseline right before you go to bed (just put socks on to keep from getting your sheets all sticky) for an overnight moisturizing treatment. (You can do the same thing on your hands if they’re dry and cracked!) I’ve even used Vaseline to fix severe dry patches on my face and neck. This stuff is a lifesaver. 
  • (You might also wanna get one of those tiny mini tubs to keep in your jacket pocket or in your bag, so you’ll always have it on you. It works way better than lip balm and is the only thing that can keep my lips from cracking and bleeding all winter long.)
  • While you’re at the store, it’s a good idea to invest in a good lotion. Most scented lotions (especially Bath & Body Works brand) actually make my dry skin worse because of the perfume in them, so you might want to look into an unscented formula. Try to avoid formulas that contain alcohol (which is sometimes used to make the lotion absorb faster) because they’ll dry you out worse than before. 
  • I always recommend using lotions and moisturizers made for sensitive skin even if your skin isn’t actually sensitive, because they don’t have as many harsh ingredients that might draw moisture out of your skin! Looking for formulas with all-natural ingredients (like Burt’s Bees and Yes To) is another good way to avoid heavy chemicals.
  • Replace your makeup remover with olive oil. It melts makeup right off, and you don’t have to scrub at your face like you do with a lot of makeup removers. It’s also super hydrating and makes my skin feel SO SOFT after I use it. (Just be sure to wash it off with a cleanser before you go to bed.) A lot of people use coconut oil the same way, but I’ve never tried it so I can’t speak for how well it works compared to olive oil. 
  • If your foundation sticks really noticeably to the dry patches on your face, a good hydrating makeup primer can help a lot. e.l.f. has really good, really cheap primers that I swear by, and they even have one specifically made for dry skin! (And you can find them at Walmart and most drugstores, so you can swing by and pick it up while you’re getting your groceries.)
  • Avoid “matte” or “mattifying” foundation formulas in general if your skin is really dry, because they’ll just make your dry patches more noticeable. Use a “satin finish” or “dewy finish” foundation instead, and if you want to make it look more matte you can always set it with a powder to take away the shine! 
  • If your lips are really dry and scaly, the best thing to do is just exfoliate the dead skin away. You can make your own lip scrub really easily by mixing sugar with either olive oil or honey, and just rub it on your lips to buff off the dry skin. Be sure to follow with Vaseline or a good lip balm!
  • As a matter of fact, you should really be exfoliating your entire face once or twice a week, especially if you have really dry skin. You can buy exfoliating scrubs at the store for a few bucks or make your own. (My favorite is a homemade scrub with 1 tablespoon of cooled green tea, 2 tablespoons of sugar, and a few drops of tea tree oil. It makes my skin soooo soft and helps fade my acne scars.)
  • Consider replacing your moisturizer with a face-safe oil like jojoba or rosehip at night. (I wouldn’t recommend using olive oil or coconut oil for this though, because they’re a little too heavy.) I started using rosehip oil every night to help with the scarring on my face, and it makes my skin feel so good. It doesn’t absorb right away, so it’s almost like sleeping in a face mask every night, and you wake up with a baby-soft face. This is the first winter I haven’t had really dry patches on my face, and I think using facial oils has a lot to do with it.
  • If your lipstick is drying out your lips, use a very light layer of Vaseline as a lip primer! This also makes the lipstick go on smoother – I’ve been using this trick for chalky/streaky lipsticks for years. (I told you, Vaseline is a lifesaver.)
  • I know everyone on tumblr is always saying this, but it really is important; you gotta stay hydrated. Drink water. (Drinks like soda actually dehydrate you, so it really does have to be water.) If your skin is just feeling a little dryer than usual, it could be because you just aren’t getting enough water. Increasing your water intake is a really easy, completely free way to help your skin out. 
  • And fyi, these tips aren’t just for girls! If you’re a guy with dry skin, feel free to use any and all of the things I talked about in this post! Taking care of your body is gender neutral and everybody deserves to have nice skin. 
“And we didn’t even know each other...”

Look. I know Zayn and Louis applied for the same job. And Niall and Liam went to the same Busted concert (presumably when they were like 8 years old when Busted was touring before 1D was formed). Both of those things are neat coincidences.

But they aren’t very significant to any of them, because they’ve mentioned both of those things like one time in interviews over the course 6 years (and it was arguably to try and make the Script concert seem like less of a thing). 

You know what’s significant? What Harry himself made significant? 

The Script concert. He had to make a public declaration about it…twice!

“This place is incredible to me…I remember coming to quite a few gigs here. I remember I stood right there watching the Script and it turns out, Louis was at the same gig!“ - Manchester, 22 December 2011

“This venue is quite special to me. I’ve been to quite a few gigs here before. And I remember, about 3 years ago, I was stood just about there to watch the Script in here, and it turns out, that Louis was at the same gig!” - Manchester, 23 December 2011

Louis and Zayn have never described their mutual employment pursuits as “incredible” or “quite special.” And neither have Liam and Niall described the Busted concert that way, despite it being literally the same scenario as Louis and Harry attending a Script concert at the same venue on the same day.

So you have to wonder why Harry cares so much, why it’s such a curious thing that they were there, together, on the same night, at the same time, doing the same thing, and they didn’t even know each other. 

But then fate twisted, and they did meet, and became so important to each other, that it made the night they missed each other that much more significant. 

anonymous asked:

I get that you aren't in a place to buy in but all of these inconsistencies must be intentional. it isn't "they said they didn't like loose ends, why are there loose ends?" but rather "They Said They Didn't Like Loose Ends And They're Everywhere"

Right so this is where I’m at right now: I agree that the sheer amount and extremity of errors and inconsistencies make absolutely no sense as things stand, but at the same time, I’m doubtful that anything can be done about it at this stage. Like, on the one hand, those errors and inconsistencies along with all of these things give logic to the 4th episode theory:

But at the same time, there are these issues with this theory, which in my opinion shouldn’t be ignored:

So my position right now is that yes, there being a fourth episode does make sense on a logical level, but I can’t see how they could actually practically execute it, unless they were to just release it on the boxset, which seems like a massive risk to me because I’ve already cancelled my s4 preorder because I was so disappointed and so have lots of other people and why air an embarrassing disaster of an episode only to reach a much more limited number with an actual potentially groundbreaking resolution?

Also, I’m just not willing to get my hopes up again if they’re only going to be crushed for the second time in less than a fortnight. At this stage, it really is a possibility that TFP was just so bad that anything else would make more sense by comparison and that this is just one more example of us being cleverer than the writers. Of course I’ll be delighted if there IS a fourth episode, but am I certain at this point? Sadly not.

believe me, i love that there’s so much transboy positivity on this website. really, i do. it makes me feel pretty good about myself, bc who doesn’t want posts telling them how cute they are? right?

the thing about it is, these posts infantilize us. they describe us in baby words, “squishy,” “cute,” “lil baby boys,” and it’s… well, it’s a bit insulting. since transboys are naturally a bit more feminine-looking than cisboys, those “compliments” play off of that. they diminish us to little more than these cute little girly boys that, hey, i can compliment them and get tumblr cred at the same time!

so, idk. hopefully it’s not just me who’s bothered by this, bc tbh it’s fairly creepy. in conclusion:

stop infantilizing transboys. (:

This conversation…. ):

Here’s the thing, Amethyst is completely right.

Someone who has a natural, genetic disadvantage can become very good at something if they break their ass trying, but they might never be at the same level as someone who puts in the same effort AND doesn’t have those particular problems.

It’s unfair, it sucks, and the worst part is that society doesn’t address it. To society, anyone can become anything no matter what disabilities one might have, but sometimes… that’s just not true. Sometimes you CAN’T do something no matter how much you try at it. And then people like that are demonized for it.

This is what I was talking about, this is the ideology that I wish was torn to the ground and burnt to a crisp. This is why Homeworld needs to be taken down. Because Amethyst doesn’t have to be a soldier, she doesn’t HAVE to be anything. She exists for herself, and that should be enough.

But to her it isn’t.

And then anger comes.


This might be the best Amethyst episode in the entire series, bar none.

“I’m not… Rose Quartz.”

Holy shit.

That might be one of the heaviest hitting lines in the entire show.

Is this the first time Steven has said his mother’s name. I think it is.

God Amethyst I love both you and Steven so much.

do you ever just think about how good teen wolf 3b was that you get emotional and binge rewatch and then you want to keep it up so you binge watch 3a and remember that that is a masterpiece as well and then the next thing you know you are sobbing bc those were the beautiful golden ages and we didn’t even know it and the show was just so good and also at the same time you’re watching dylan o’brien transform into an actual star right before your eyes and your core four is still there and it’s all just so beautiful and then you never want to stop rewatching 3a and 3b on a loop for the rest of your life???

nope!??! just me!?? ok

Okay so those people who are like “meat is a cultural thing for me stfu white vegans stop trying to take my culture away” piss me off so much and here’s why:

I’m Lebanese, though I easily pass as white. And I get that I don’t have the same experiences as a lot of Arab individuals because I pass as white, but you know what I definitely still have? The food and its cultural aspects, shared with my family. Lebanese food is super meat heavy. There’s lamb in like everything, and where there isn’t lamb, there’s chicken or butter or eggs or labneh (a type of yogurt).

And I have veganized every. Fucking. Dish I have ever wanted to eat since I went vegan. I still enjoy vegan versions of traditional foods with my family. My dad and I even have awesome cooking adventures where we veganize Lebanese dishes together even though he isn’t vegan. It’s a lot of fun. I cook my cultural foods more now than I used to. I use rice and lentils or mashed potatoes in place of lamb, and vegan meat in place of chicken, and margarine for butter. My family loves making traditional plant based foods for me that we didn’t eat that much once. My meat loving uncle was so proud of the tabouleh he made this summer and we ate a whole bunch of it together. Because you know what I’ve discovered? It isn’t the meat that matters. It’s the spices, and the process of making the food, or the specific way it’s eaten, and sharing those foods with your family. That’s the part that matters. You don’t need to kill animals for cultural dishes. There are so many POC vegans out there who make it work just fine, and you could too if you would just listen for 5 seconds instead of erasing our existence so you don’t have to leave your comfort zone.

“Force” is the right word for Carrie Fisher-  she was a force of nature, a force to be reckoned with.  She was endlessly funny and honest and entertaining all at the same time and she never ever failed to delight me and fill me with joy. She had such a gift for words, a brilliant sense of humor and an extremely brave capacity for self-awareness. She meant so much to so many, and said a great many wonderful things on behalf of women and those suffering from mental illness. For so many people she was a hero for being Carrie, not just Princess Leia. She had such a profound way of expressing herself with grace and humor and clarity that blew me away. She spoke her own truth bravely and with no apologies.

I will never forget  how openly and honestly Carrie spoke about her past addictions or Hollywood’s rampant sexism. Her ability to frankly address addiction and mental illness is her greatest legacy. She spoke candidly, with the perfect articulation.  She let people in on the intimacies of her life without making it feeling salacious. She was so incredibly sharp and smart and honest that she made it look natural and easy to be herself. But we knew it was not, because she spoke openly about her experiences and she let you know that there were dark times without fear of us seeing her warts- and she was self deprecating in a way only she could be about herself without being bitter. She could find the humor and the poignancy in a single situation and express it all in the same sentence.

Carrie expressed herself so well, knew herself so deeply, and just was so unapologetically herself that she made you feel as if you knew her. Which is why the loss of her feels like the tragic loss of a true friend and why the grief is so deep. I never had to desperately hope and dream to meet Carrie because I felt like I knew her every time I saw her or read her brilliant words. I wish I had better words for her but ironically I think the only person who could do her justice would be Carrie herself.

This woman’s absence leaves a black hole, not just in a galaxy far far away- but in our own universe, and in a world where we need more women like Carrie, not fewer. And in my heart and the hearts of many too.

I love you Carrie. I will miss you so much.


I looked over at the empty bed, rubbing my hands together as I contemplated her last words. 

Dean, you don’t love me. You love the idea of me, and that’s why I have to go.”

Those words cut me like a knife, mostly because she couldn’t have been more wrong. Y/N always had a way of thinking she knew what was best. For everyone. 

She’d make an executive decision when she thought she needed to. She always thought she was doing the right thing. Nine times out of ten, she was right. This time, she was wrong. 

I guess we have that in common. Sam has told me on more than one occasion the same damn things I’m thinking about Y/N. 

We are so much alike it scares me. 

Maybe that’s why she thought I didn’t love her. Maybe she saw all of her flaws in me and that scared her. Maybe she didn’t love me, but the idea of me. 

That idea scared the hell out of me because I needed her. Especially after everything we had been through together. 

I picked up my phone and dialed her number. Straight to voicemail. 

“Listen, Y/N. I know you think you’re right. You usually are,” I sighed, running my hand over my face before continuing. “But this time, you’re wrong. I love you. I need you. Now more than ever. I’m going to find you. I’m not letting you run away this time.” 

I hung up the phone, grabbed my bag and headed for the Impala. I wasn’t letting her get away this time. 


You looked at the phone as it mocked you. One voicemail. You knew exactly whose voice would sound through the phone the minute you listened to the voicemail, but it didn’t stop you for hitting play. 

“Listen, Y/N. I know you think you’re right. You usually are,” he sighed, and paused before continuing. “But this time, you’re wrong. I love you. I need you. Now more than ever. I’m going to find you. I’m not letting you run away this time.” 

You threw the phone across the car. 

“Dammit!” you screamed, gripping the wheel tight, tears streaming down your face. Dean couldn’t really love you. You weren’t someone who deserved anyone’s love. Especially Dean’s. 

He’d left that message two days ago. 

You sat in the empty parking lot of a disgusting motel, your eyes squeezed shut as you thought. 

A knock on your window made you nearly jump out of the seat. 

You turned and there were the green eyes you were running from. The green eyes you were trying desperately to save. After the two of you had come back from Purgatory, you’d felt so lost. 

Running had seemed like the right choice. You needed Dean too much after everything in Purgatory. You couldn’t depend on any one person as much as you did Dean. That usually only ended one way, and that was losing that person.

But you stared into Dean’s eyes, and for a brief second forgot why you had run in the first place. 

“Son of a bitch,” you mumbled, running your fingers through your short Y/H/C hair as Dean opened your door. You weren’t sure what was going to come of this confrontation, but you couldn’t keep running. 

Dean would always find you. Especially if he loved you like he said. 

“What the hell, Y/N?” Dean growled.

He grabbed your arm and pulled you roughly against him, his lips crashing to yours, and you let him. You couldn’t promise you wouldn’t run again when you came to your senses, but for now, you let Dean’s arms comfort you. 

For now, you let yourself stupidly believe that maybe, just maybe, you were safe. 

Message submitted from @chaos-and-the-calm67 when she sent the gif: I saw this and I’d thought I’d send it in *hides face*