this. forever and ever and infinity always

See You Soon | Yoongi

Summary: In which you live in a world where one stroke of a pen against your skin is a signage of forever, and Min Yoongi just has really good timing
Genre: Fluff with a touch of Angst, Soulmate!AU where when you write something on your skin with pen/marker, it will show up on your soulmate’s skin as well
Word Count: 7,276
Author’s Note: I have officially joined the Soulmate!AU train of writers, and I hope this is worthy enough for that title. The original story was meant to be super short and super sweet, but of course I just kept adding more and more ideas into this and… this is the end result. Little warning, it is mainly Yoongi/Reader with a side of Jungkook/Reader so… take that as you will. 

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The first time images appear on your skin, you are 12 and have absolutely no idea why. Questions spring up in your mind like wildfire—alarming and so completely out of your control that you perform what could only be politely labeled as a scream before you dash to the bathroom, rubbing roughly at the skin of your arm until the flesh turns bright red. The marks, however, do not fade away.

Taking in a few sharp inhales, you collect your thoughts long enough to carefully study the marks that have been embedded into your skin—ink underneath the flesh that you carefully run your finger across. The end product looks to be a night sky along your forearm. There is a half-crescent moon and lazy stars dancing across the way; twinkling lines and hazy shapes and thick lines like they had been drawn with a sharpie.

For some odd reason, the longer you stare at the drawing, you don’t feel the panic settling back into your nerves. Rather, you feel more calm, peaceful, as if staring at the face of familiarity, like these drawings of half-crescent moons and 6 pointed stars genuinely mean something to you. Or at least, they hold enough significance that you don’t scream or continue trying to rub away the spots.

Your mother comes bounding into the room shortly after, startled by your scream until she sees the source of your apprehension and her lips curl up into a soft and understanding smile. It is right then and there, when she takes your arm, soothingly running her thumb up and down the expanse of the night sky that she spins the narrative of fate, destiny, and the universe.

She tells you that the moment people are born, they are instantly bound with another, tied together by some predetermined string, gifting you with someone you are meant to spend the rest of your life with. Someone who fit against every curve, someone who loved you in every aspect no matter what. Someone who would look at you, and you could just feel the weight of their stares like none other—set all your nerves on fire with just a single touch, leave you knowing without a doubt that that person was the one you were meant to spend your life with.

Your soulmate. Your other half.

Keep reading

1. “You could rattle the stars. You could do anything if only you dared. And deep down, you know it too, and that’s what scares you the most.” —Sarah J. Maas, Throne of Glass

2. “When people fall in love, they burst into flames.” Jandy Nelson, I’ll Give You the Sun

3. “The words were on their way, and when they arrived, she would hold them in her hands like clouds, and she would ring them out like the rain.” —Markus Zusak, The Book Thief

4. “Things were rough all over but it was better that way. That way, you could tell the other guy was human too.” —S.E. Hinton, The Outsiders

5. “I try to think about how it all works. At school dances, I sit in the background, and I tap my toe, and I wonder how many couples will dance to ‘their song.’ In the hallways, I see the girls wearing the guys’ jackets, and I think about the idea of property. And I wonder if anyone is really happy. I hope they are. I really hope they are.” —Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being a Wallflower

6. “To be careful with people and with words was a rare and beautiful thing.” Benjamin Alire Sáenz, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

7. “He didn’t give me flowers or candy. He gave me the moon and the stars. Infinity.” —Jenny Han, We’ll Always Have Summer

8. “He was contemplation and enthusiasm. Ambition and strong coffee. I could have looked at him forever.” ―E. Lockhart, We Were Liars

9. “She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something.” Rainbow Rowell, Eleanor & Park

10. “Slowly, very slowly, he sat up and as he did so he felt more alive and more aware of his own living body than ever before. Why had he never appreciated what a miracle he was, brain and nerve and bounding heart?” ―J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

11. “Real life was something happening in her peripheral vision.” ―Rainbow Rowell, Fangirl

12. “Without a filter, a man is just chaos walking.” ―Patrick Ness, The Knife of Never Letting Go

13. “Don’t be afraid of death; be afraid of an unlived life. You don’t have to live forever, you just have to live.” Natalie Babbitt, Tuck Everlasting

14. “Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you! Let nothing be lost upon you. Be always searching for new sensations. Be afraid of nothing.”—Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

15. “It’s like the people who believe they’ll be happy if they go and live somewhere else, but who learn it doesn’t work that way. Wherever you go, you take yourself with you. If you see what I mean.” —Neil Gaiman, The Graveyard Book

16. “We feel cold, but we don’t mind it, because we will not come to harm. And if we wrapped up against the cold, we wouldn’t feel other things, like the bright tingle of the stars, or the music of the aurora, or best of all the silky feeling of moonlight on our skin. It’s worth being cold for that.” —Philip Pullman, The Golden Compass

19. “The right belief is like a good cloak, I think. If it fits you well, it keeps you warm and safe. The wrong fit however, can suffocate.” ―Brandon Sanderson, The Final Empire

20. “October extinguished itself in a rush of howling winds and driving rain and November arrived, cold as frozen iron, with hard frosts every morning and icy drafts that bit at exposed hands and faces.” ―J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

21. Sometimes writing is running downhill, your fingers jerking behind you on the keyboard the way your legs do when they can’t quite keep up with gravity.” ―Rainbow Rowell, Fangirl

22.  “His soul might be a sun. I’ve never met anyone who had the sun for a soul.” ―Jandy Nelson, I’ll Give You the Sun

23. “I bet you could sometimes find all the mysteries of the universe in someone’s hand.” ―Benjamin Alire Sáenz, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

24. “Libraries were full of ideas–perhaps the most dangerous and powerful of all weapons.”Sarah J. Maas, Throne of Glass

25. “To draw you must close your eyes and sing.” ―Jandy Nelson, I’ll Give You the Sun

Listen

‘What’s a soulmate?’

'It’s eerr.. well, it’s like a best friend but more. It’s the one person that knows you better than anyone else in the world. Someone who makes you a better person.. or actually, they don’t make you a better person, you do that yourself because they inspire you. A soulmate is someone you carry with you forever. It’s the one person who.. who knew you and accepted you… believed in you, before anyone else did, or when no one else would. And no matter what happens, you’ll always love them. Nothing can ever change that.’

I cry every time I hear this.

Trying to Fix a Divorce

PART 2

There was a time when you thought he loved you.

He had fooled you - he really did, with his soft forehead kisses and gentle caresses and quiet I love you’s that acted as a key to your heavily guarded heart. He opened it; cracked the safe open after patient waiting, and you let him.

You let his words fool you, you let the light in his bright brown eyes blind you, you let his touch suck out any doubts you had. You let him love you. You let yourself love him.

You let him take your heart.

And in a way, you set yourself up for letting him break it.

You thought you had something real with Jaebum. Something tangible, something indestructible, something infinite. You let yourself believe that what you had with Jaebum was love, that what you found was a once in a lifetime treasure.

He had tricked you well, you admit. He tricked you very well indeed.

He had fooled you with his first I love you, brunette eyes twinkling, smiling bashfully as he waiting for your response. He had fooled you with every kiss, every laugh, every hug, every long conversation at three in the morning, bodies intertwined in a bed, talking about the universe and where the two of you fit. He had fooled you when he got down on one knee and told you that he wanted to be yours forever; that he’d be the happiest man on earth, that you completed him, that you were the one. He had fooled you exceptionally well on the day you walked towards him swathed in white, his bright blue eyes glimmering with tears - I vow to love you for the rest of my existence; for this life, for the next, forever because I finally know now my place in this universe, and it’s next to you.

He had fooled you very well that night. That night with him in his perfectly pressed tie and beam on his lips, that night where you danced with him for hours, where he leaned down to kiss you at the altar and took you for his own. The night where skin met skin, where you marked every crevice of his body as your own as he did the same to yours. The night where you joined in every way possible; the night where you had thought with a certainty in your bones, this is love.

You fell for it. You fell for it, every step of the way.

You thought your dreams were coming true. You thought you were living in some sort of fantasy when you married the man you loved - past tense - when you found out you were expecting, when you ultimately gave birth to the ray of sunshine that you would call your daughter.

You thought you had it all. A loving husband. A beautiful daughter. A perfect family.

But you learned the hard way that all things fade with time.

Your love for your precious daughter seemed to grow as Jaebum’s love for you diminished.

Your daughter was the light of your life - she was a part of you and you loved caring for her, no matter how tired you were. There was something in her bright  eyes that pulled you to her, exactly like Jaebum’s that magnetized you.

You cared for her. You fed her and sang to her and you looked over her and played with her and read to her and you loved her with your whole heart, just like how you loved Jaebum.

But that changed. At least for him.

He started disappearing more and more, going to this place with the boys then going there to record then this show and that venue - and you understood. You understood that it was his job, and this was what came with it.

But when Jaebum started coming back later and later, with photos on this website and that program of him and the boys out partying or seen in this club - you knew that wasn’t part of the job.

You confronted him about it, of course - but it only resulted in whisper arguments that hurt you more than screaming matches because you could hear the steady fury in his voice, an anger and weariness in his blue eyes that weren’t there before.

I’m just trying to have some fun.

And you’d laugh mirthlessly, eyes rolling.

I get that, Jaebum. I really do. But you’ve got other priorities now - a family. There are some other things that come before partying and drinks.

He never did change.

-

Jaebum had loved you in the beginning. He had loved you and your daughter, and the first few years were filled with happiness and joy and clumsy attempts at parenting that ended with laughter and stories to tell friends and family as a good dinnertime joke.

Your daughter’s first words. Her first step. Buying all the toys in the world for her and baking in the kitchen and singing to her on Sunday mornings. Hearing her chatter on and on about the strangest things that brought the both of you smiles in the morning and snuggling in close with each other - as a family - at night.

But as the months turned into years, it was as if his love dragged out. As if it was wearing thin.

You loved him infinitely, with all of your heart. But it was different for him.

You didn’t notice it at first. It was subtle, like soft waves starting to change direction. It wasn’t until some more time passed did you realize you were going the wrong way the whole entire time.

Jaebum was drifting away from you - slowly and surely, drifting away from the boy who smiled at you with innocent dimples in his cheeks, drifting away the man who told you he loved you and your daughter, lively eyes identical to hers as he played games with her, as he gazed into yours.

He was drifting away, and wherever he was going, it was clear that he wanted to go without you, despite his previous promises.

I promise I’ll always be by your side - forever and through infinity, through thick and thin, I’ll be there.

Always? Always.

Going, going…

… gone.

-

Sometimes he left for tour without a single phone call home.

And it hurt you when your beautiful daughter asked you when’s daddy coming back home?

You didn’t know. You didn’t know if he ever came back home again; not when there was something hollow in his eyes, lacking warmth, lacking love.

Soon, you always answered. Daddy’ll be back home soon.

Soon, the Jaebum that you loved would walk back through those doors with a smile on his lips and something sincere in his heart. Soon, the man that you loved would come back to you, just like he promised.

Soon.

-

You didn’t want to.

You really didn’t.

But you had to.

You had fretted over it for nights and weeks and months of tossing and turning on your bed, alone. You were conflicted and lost, and every time you sought warmth or comfort or guidance, you would reach out and find that you were alone.

Just cold sheets and a spot where someone else should be.

Jaebum.

And in the end, it was that empty space that echoed your decisions.

It’s for the best.

-

You deserved better.

You really did. You deserved someone who would help you do the dishes at night, someone to take turns doing the laundry, someone to help you fix the broken television or to help you clean the house on Sundays. You deserved someone to hold you to sleep at night and someone to come home to with a smile on their face, waiting. You deserved soft kisses on the lips after a long day of work and a long shower and cuddle sessions that melted all your worries away.

You weren’t the best person, you knew. But you thought you deserved at least that much.

And if not, then your daughter deserved better.

She deserved a father who would pick her up in his arms and carry her on his shoulders in the park. She deserved a father who would play tea party with her and a father who would kiss her head hello when he came home. She deserved a father who would protect her from the monsters under her bed, a father to watch over her as she skipped to school.

She, at the very least, deserved a phone call from her supposed father telling her where he was. Telling her that he missed her. That he loved her. That he’d be back soon.

Your daughter deserved a father.

Not a stranger who shared the same blue eyes that were always so distant and far away, even when he was in the same room.

-

You left the papers on his manager’s desk, folded into a white envelope with his name neatly printed on it.

You had already signed your name, contacted all the right people, went to all the meetings.

Your hands shook when you left it on the table, hesitating for a few minutes. Your breaths came out shaky and you clutched your bag so hard your knuckles nearly turned white.

But you steeled yourself and placed the envelope in the middle of his desk - to Mr. Im Jaebum - and turned around, leaving before anyone else saw you there.

You didn’t have a place there any more.

You didn’t have a place in Jaebum’s heart any more.

Well, now he didn’t have a place in yours.

-

When’s daddy coming back again?

You held your daughter’s hand, suitcase in tow. She trailed beside you, her little pink suitcase rolling behind her, bumping in between the cracks of the sidewalk.

You had packed and left, spending the past three weeks putting your things in neat, organized boxes and shipping them to your family’s house, where you planned to stay for the next few months until you could find a place of your own.

That wasn’t home any more.

Daddy’s not coming back for a while, baby.

Your words are soft and gentle, and you try to bite back the tears. Your daughter still believed she had a father when you saw him leave a long, long time ago.

You told her the two of you would be moving - going to a new home and staying with some family for the time being.

Of course, this was met with a few temper tantrums and tears and questions that you had to painfully answer - alone, alone, always so painfully alone - but she complied. She bounced back. She always did.

And you would too.

You just didn’t know how to exactly tell your little daughter that Jaebum wouldn’t be there any more.

Why not?

The question is simple, innocent; punctuated by two, bright eyes that looked up at you with the utmost naivete.

It hurts you more than any wounded glare could.

Daddy’s busy. He’s very busy and he won’t be coming back.

Your words are light despite the burden on your shoulders.

Daddy’s never home any more. I miss daddy.

You start to feel the weight seep into you, and it leaves you weak, barely able to move on. Barely able to bring the last set of suitcases to your family home.

These past few weeks have been so, so tiring.

You tried to smile for your family, your friends, your daughter. But it never came out right any more. Not ever since Jaebum started to fade away.

There’s one more thing he took.

I miss him too.

Your words are quiet, but your daughter still hears them, her hands squeezing yours comfortingly.

But mommy’s here now. Mommy’s always going to be here for you, okay? I’m not going anywhere. Mommy’s not going to leave like daddy.

Your words start to shake with tears, but you’re not sure your daughter hears it. You hope she doesn’t. This hasn’t been easy on her too, whether or not she knows the full picture - it hasn’t been easy on either of you.

You had to stay strong. Just like you always did.

Promise?

You remember when you asked the very same thing to Jaebum, the same hopeful lilt in your voice as your daughter’s, so many years ago when he said he would stay by your side forever.

Oh, how things have changed.

But you haven’t. You still kept your promises, and though your heart is heavier guarded now, you still kept your word with your whole heart.

Though the positions are reversed now, you aren’t one to let someone you love down.

Promise.

-

He comes home to a half-empty house.

Half a closet full of clothes. Bedrooms bare, walls of pictures and drawings stripped. Bathroom counters left half-touched, kitchen empty.

It was eerie - how half the house was living, as if it was half-breathing, struggling to cling on to life. As if it was half dead already.

He’s confused and dazed and shocked, the silence turning numb in his ears.

When he picks up the call from his manager, the explanation falls on him like weights, pulling him down as he drowned in the emptiness.

Divorce.

He asks again, just to check. It can’t be true. It couldn’t be true.

Not when you were still in this very house six months ago, a half-smile on your lips and a happy beam on your daughter’s face.

(it was always a half-smile. the house was always half-empty - he just didn’t notice. he was the empty half, and now that he was truly alone, he sees just what he’s done.)

But that was six months ago.

Jaebum calls you, and your phone rings once, twice, three times.

You see the caller ID, and you know it’s him. You’ve been waiting for it.

You knew he was coming back today, sitting on the couch biting your nails, a nervous wreck.

But when you picked up the phone, you were calm, cool, and collected.

Unfeeling, despite the soft flickers that sparked once you heard his voice again.

Is this some sick joke?

You brace yourself, telling yourself to stand firm.

You remember the empty bed. You remember the questions of where’s daddy from your daughter’s lips, and you remember the loneliness that ate you inside out every night.

Does it look like I’m laughing, Jaebum? I can hardly remember the last time I’ve smiled because of you.

There’s silence.

You can hear him breathing on the other end; sharp, quick intakes of breaths as if he forgot how to breathe. As if he was suffocating.

Suffocating from the emptiness.

When he speaks again, his next words are cracked, broken. Chipped on the edges and hoarse when they leave his throat.

Come back home.

You can’t hold back a mirthless laugh, your voice twisted in a way that you can barely recognize.

Can’t you see, Jaebum? I was always there. Always waiting. It was you who never came back. You were the one who never came back, and guess what?

You take a deep breath, trying to pace yourself and refrain from letting all the bitterness and anger seep into your voice.

I’m finding a new home.

He’s silent, as still as stone. He doesn’t say a word, and you didn’t expect him to.

You hang up the phone, and Jaebum can’t help but to think that the flat line sounds a lot like a final goodbye.

He wouldn’t sign the papers.

He wouldn’t give up on you. Not without a fight.

No, he wouldn’t give up on you at all.

He wouldn’t let you walk out of his life, just like that.

He forgets that he did the exact same to you, so many times before.

-

Jaebum tells you he wants to talk to you first.

Just sign the papers, Jaebum.

He refuses stubbornly, insisting on seeing you to discuss it.

I just want to talk.

You laugh humorlessly, though you’re careful not to wake your sleeping daughter in the next room.

Six months and suddenly you want to talk to me? Is this what it takes?

Your humor is twisted and you suspect you’re not quite right. You’re not sure if it’s because of Jaebum’s absence or his sudden reappearance; if he’s your problem or your solution.

Look, just have lunch with me tomorrow. We’ll settle everything then.

You’re quiet for a moment, contemplating your choices. You wanted this to be quick, clean, and painless - you didn’t want your resolve to crack and you didn’t want to be the weak one anymore.

Fine.

The word comes out short, clipped, and you want it to scratch him like broken glass.

You tell yourself this is the last time you’re giving in to Jaebum.

-

You vow to yourself you wouldn’t forget.

You wouldn’t forget every lonely night, every empty morning. You wouldn’t forget the silence that echoed too loudly or the nights when you collapsed with no one to catch you. You wouldn’t forget long days and sleepless nights of trying to raise a child by yourself, of trying to raise yourself. You wouldn’t forget the hopeless waiting, the stupid yearning, the foolish hoping.

You wouldn’t forget what Jaebum had done to you - or rather, what he didn’t do.

You wouldn’t let yourself forget your daughter asking you where’s daddy or coming back home crying because her friend’s dad picked her up and her daddy never came to see her at school and you wouldn’t forget the messy crayon drawings of Jaebum and your family that your daughter buried in her notebooks for him to see but never would, or the memories of her sitting next to the phone every night, waiting for it to ring.

You steeled yourself with these memories and you let them make you stronger instead of break you down.

You wouldn’t let him break you.

Not when he already has.

-

He’s already there, waiting for you.

You come ten minutes late, just to spite him. Just so he knows what it’s like to wait, to wonder where you are, to feel that flicker of doubt that you had for six months.

He smiles faintly at you, but you are steel and you refuse to bend.

But you can’t help but to notice how his hair is a little longer, a little messier; how his eyes have faint shadows underneath them, how there’s a stubble on his chin - he never did shave until you reminded him - and you notice how there’s something off about him.

The person who sits across from you is a stranger in the body of a man you once knew so well.

“Where’s your ring?”

It’s the first thing he asks you, the first thing he notices. His dark eyes dart to your ring finger, and he sees that it’s bare; a pale strip of skin where the band of gold should be.

He’s not sure why his heart plummets.

“Let’s discuss what we came here for, shall we?”

You’re curt and cold, wanting to get out of there before you broke in front of him.

It’s been so long. You want to reach out and touch his face or hold his hand or just simply feel his touch, but you remind yourself what you were here for. Of what was right.

“About the.. the di - di - ”

The word won’t leave his lips, almost as if he’s afraid he says it out loud, it’ll become reality and crash down onto him.

But you’ve already come to terms of the crumbled remains of what the two of you called a marriage.

“Divorce, yes.”

Jaebum winces when you say the word, and you raise an eyebrow of amusement at his reaction.

“I don’t see why we need it.“

"Of course you don’t see it, Jaebum. You’re never there.”

“I’m on tour, why can’t you understand - ”

Those four words, those four stupid words hits a switch in you, and you find yourself snapping, your next words coming out low and venomous.

“I do understand, Jaebum. Don’t you think for a single moment that I don’t. Because I do. I understand that you have a job and that you have a dream and yes, that requires you to leave. That it requires you to leave for months at a time and that it requires to leave even when you’re here. I understood when you asked me to be your girlfriend, when you asked me to marry you. I knew the terms and conditions; I knew you’d be gone and I knew that for most of the seasons I’d be alone. I understand.”

Jaebum’s lips snap shut and he recoils at your sudden poison.

“But do you understand, Jaebum? Do you understand that you have a family? That it might require some effort even when you’re gone? Do you understand that maybe when I signed up to marry you, I wanted a husband, not a ghost? That our daughter deserves a father and not some stranger in the house? Do you understand that just because you have a dream and just because you have this job, it does not act as an excuse in this family?”

When you’re done, you’re breathless and agitated.

So much for keeping your cool.

But the months of bitterness leave your lips and you can’t help but to feel a little bit lighter.

You don’t consider the idea that you might be a little bit more hollow on the inside.

Jaebum is silent, his eyes downcast, avoiding yours. His lips are pressed tautly together, his hands entwined with each other, knuckles white.

After a moment, he finally responds.

“I do.”

“No, you don’t.”

You slam him down, and you can’t deny that it feels good for a moment, to have him hurt as you did. To hurt him as he did to you.

You ignore the guilt that tries to seep into your bones.

“I can change.”

“No, you can’t.”

“There was a time when you thought I could.”

“That was before you let me down, Jaebum.”

His jaw is clenched and he’s starting to shake and you think you might be starting to break at seeing him like this - so broken, so conflicted, and all because of you.

You want to see him break as much as you want to see him fly and all you can do is hope you don’t shatter before he does.

His words are soft and haunted, a shaking whisper.

“You’re killing me here.”

“Then I’m already dead.”

He looks up at you then, his bright eyes starting to swim with tears. You will yourself not to drown like you did so many times before.

“Just - please, Jaebum. Please sign the papers. It’s all I ask of you. It’s all I’ll ever ask of you again.”

You whisper, trying to keep the emotion out of your voice. You push the papers closer to him, and he looks at them, chin quivering.

He looks defeated.

“It’s for the best, Jaebum.”

His hands are still knotted in his lap, making no move to pick up the pen in front of him.

“What about - what about..?”

His words are hoarse and trembling, though he tries to control himself. He tries to control his tears from falling and you try to do the same.

You can’t remember the last time you saw Jaebum cry.

You can’t remember the last time you were the reason for his tears.

Things change, you suppose.

It doesn’t make it hurt any less though.

“She’ll be with me. But you can still see her - when you’re here you can have her for half the week or for weekends and when you’re not I’ll take care of her. We’ll work something out.”

“But we can’t work this out?”

“You’ve given me nothing to work with, Jaebum.”

You’re hurting him and if this was a battlefield then he would be bleeding on the ground.

But you don’t let yourself forget the scars he gave you; the ones that still haven’t quite stopped bleeding.

“So that’s it? You’re just taking everything?”

His voice is getting steadier now, the trembling subsiding. He stops sinking into his seat and he starts looking at you, and you meet his stare, refusing to back down.

“It’s nothing you haven’t left behind already.”

You raise your chin stubbornly, though your knees are shaking in your seat.

You just wanted to get out of there, to leave Jaebum’s piercing eyes before they broke you again, to forget what it was like to be so close to him again.

“So everything we had.. everything was nothing to you?”

His words are whispers, dark brown eyes boring into yours.

“What was it to you?”

You refuse to back down to his stare, no matter how nervous it made you, no matter how many butterflies erupted in your stomach.

“Love.”

His answer is simple, the word almost light amidst the heaviness of the conversation.

“It didn’t feel like it.”

Your words are hard and biting as you remember the nights alone in the empty bed, of counting down the days on the calendar, of waiting for a phone call that never came.

“Then what did it feel like to you? What did you feel when I held you in my arms when I came out of the airport? What did you feel when I made you mine, when you accepted me, welcomed me? What did you feel on the night of our wedding, when we exchanged vows, when you walked down that aisle? What was that feeling?”

His voice grows stronger, though his volume never increases. His eyes bore into yours, his voice low, his frame no longer weak and sinking into his chair.

“Tell me, what did you feel?”

“We were young and stupid and it was a rash decision and we were foolish and we moved too fast and - ”

The excuses you rehearsed so many times in your head fall out of your lips, tumbling like an avalanche - hardly the eloquence you hoped for.

His words were threatening to crack you.

“What did you feel?”

“I felt love, Jaebum. I felt love when I kissed you at that stupid altar and I felt love when you got down on one knee. I felt love when you kissed me, I felt love when you returned home and when you laid down next to me.”

There’s a tremble in your voice that you hate, but at least you get the solidity of the words out.

“That’s the thing, Jaebum. I felt it. It was there, but now.. now it’s gone. What I feel now is loneliness. Emptiness.”

His next words are barely a whisper, his eyes sad.

“Why did you let it go?”

“Why did you take it away?”

You answer his question with one of your own, and you can see the frustration and sadness and anger in his eyes; the same reflecting in your own.

“Please, Jaebum. I came here to get the papers back with your signature on this. Don’t make this any harder than it already is.”

“And I came to fix this. Why take the easy route of destruction when we can rebuild?”

“There’s nothing left, Jaebum.”

“Then we’ll start from scratch again.”

There’s a faintest hint of a smile on his lips, the smallest rays of hope in his eyes.

“I don’t want to build something only to have it broken again.”

“I don’t want to leave a mess of perfectly good parts lying around.”

You glare at him, and you think you might be imagining it, but you think you see his smile grow, just a little.

“You had your chances, Jaebum.”

“So you’re just going to do this to our family? Tear us apart like this? What about our daughter? What about us?”

“It’s nothing you haven’t already torn apart, Jaebum.”

“I can fix it.”

“We’re not a car, Jaebum. Some things.. some things should just stay broken.”

“We’re not ‘some things’. We’re something more than that.”

“Don’t be delusional.”

“Don’t be a pessimist.”

You sigh in frustration, your banter getting you nowhere you wanted it to.

When you look at Jaebum, he’s not smirking like you thought he would be. He’s looking at you intently, hope in his eyes and the smallest smile on his lips.

He leans over and encases your hands in his; the feeling of his hands over yours foreign yet so strangely familiar all at once, like reading a line off a forgotten book that once held so much meaning to you before you hid it on a shelf to gather dust.

“Just one chance. Just one. That’s all I’m asking of you.”

He’s pleading with you, and you will your resolve not to crack.

“That’s one more than you deserve, Jaebum.”

“Then find it in your heart to pity me. I’m not asking you to forgive me - I know I screwed up and I know I was an idiot and I’m sorry I’m sorry - and I know the last thing I deserve right now is forgiveness.”

You’re silent, pursing your lips.

But you don’t move your hands from his, either.

“I’m asking for you to let me fix things. To own up to my mistakes. To change - and I know you think I can’t, but that’s the first thing I want to change.”

He smiles at you, the light slowly returning into his eyes.

“I love you. And I know I’m terrible at showing it and I know I’m a crap husband and a crap father and that the two of you deserve better but you know I’ve always been a stubborn, selfish little shit and that I could never let either you go.”

“I’m not asking for you to love me again. I’m not asking you to move back in. I’m asking for you to let me work on this, one day at a time. I’ll sleep alone. I’ll give you space. And then maybe I’ll call when you’re comfortable. And we’ll work it up to a visit. I don’t care if it takes months or years; I’m not leaving until I make it right.”

His fingers start to rub against your knuckles softly, and you can’t help but to relax, to melt under his touch.

“And - and if I screw it up, if I screw anything up, then I’ll sign those papers. I promise.”

He sounds sad, but his voice is sincere, and you can’t help but to believe him.

“I always keep my promises.”

You raise an eyebrow at him at his statement, and he catches it, a small, humorless chuckle leaving his lips.

“I know you don’t think that way, but I do. I remember every promise I made you, from those late nights when we were seventeen to the promises I made to you at the altar. I know I haven’t been very good at keeping them, but I don’t intend on breaking them. I meant every word. I mean every word. I love you.”

He looks at you, eyes full of hope, and you think you’ve melted.

“Okay.”

You’re quiet, the word barely leaving your lips. You almost hope Jaebum doesn’t catch it.

You hate yourself for giving in, but you can’t help but to love the beam that blooms on Jaebum’s face; his features lightening instantly, melting away to the epitome of happiness and relief.

“Don’t make me regret it.”

“I won’t. Thank you.”

Almost by instinct, he leans over and envelops you in a bone-crushing hug.

You’re instantly immersed in his scent and his arms and in him, and it was like falling all over again.

He tenses when he realizes what he’s done, afraid of stepping over the line.

But you find yourself relaxing in his arms, the smallest of smiles starting to spread on your lips.

It wasn’t home, not quite yet - but for the first time in a long time, you let yourself believe that one day, maybe it could be again.

If I ever fall in love

If I ever say I do,

if I’m ever bought a toaster,

I will build a household

made of bricks around it.


But we won’t have a “home”,

no, we’ll build a “safe house.”

So if my lover ever tries to hide from the world,

I’ll always be there waiting with apple pie.


And we’ll play games in the backyard – forever –

like hide-and-go-seek,

that way he has to count to infinity

before he goes out looking for trouble.


This place will remind us that life changes,

daily, without warning.

It will try to lead you a million different ways at once

and every one might be the wrong path.

But finding yourself on the wrong side of the tracks

is the best way to see

what’s waiting on the other side.


People lose their way.

We get lost, and sometimes

the words or a compass can’t quite be read.

If he finds himself reading a map

of Jabberwocky upside-down

or caught between a Bandersnatch

and a hard place, I’ll stand at his side

to remind him that everything will be ok

if we stop to take a look in the mirror.


But, too, that a mirror will never be big enough

to fit all the demons in a horror story.

And I’ll tell him, “our vanity above the bathroom sink

simply missed out on becoming a telescope.

So, don’t stare too hard or look too far.”


I’ll tell him, “don’t forget I only have two hands,

two arms, but my hugs have four walls,

and you are the one with the spare key.”

And remember how you came here.


When we almost drowned looking for the fountain of youth,

we caught a glimpse of a fallen tower in Atlantis

that pointed to the skyline

over easy street and limbo.


Just at the end of the lane sat a poorhouse

in our hometown that had burned to the ground

time and time again.

But each time a phoenix was born,

and you followed them and their fireworks,

every last one leaving you

just as black and covered in soot.


Until we followed the same one,

soaring on a second wind,

that became the weather vane

atop our inflammable house. 

BTS REACTION: To finding out you have depression/anxiety

Her you go my darlings. Now listen. I suffer from anxiety and depression so I felt like it would be comforting to make something like this.

 

Anxiety and Depression are serious. You are not alone! I am here for you!!!

Jin:

The second you told he pulled you into his arms. “No matter what I am here for you…always” he said while stroking your head. “I wish you had told me sooner…I never want you going through anything hard by yourself again” he said leaning down and pressing a sweet and gentle kiss against your lips.

Suga:

He was taken back a bit. He looked at you in disbelief. “Why wouldn’t you tell me sooner…I would have came home earlier to spend more time with you…"  he looked sad. He came over and held you tight. "I am here for you Jagi…Tell me whenever you need me and I will drop everything” he said into your neck.

J-hope:

He would try so hard to keep you smiling. “I will always be here for you. I love you~” he said while peppering your face in kisses that sent you into giggles. “That’s all I want…to see you smile everyday.” he leaned down and gave you a kiss on the lips and through the kiss you felt that he really cared and would keep his word.

Rapmonster:

He would smile. “you are so strong…I love you…I’m here for you. I know I  talk a lot but if you ever need to talk seriously I’m here..” he said holding you close. He pulled away from the hug to look into your eyes and repeat how much he really loved you.

V:

He frowned. “I want you to be happy…do I make you unhappy?” he asked, voice full of pain. You quickly denied it and held onto him. “ I love you Tae. you are the only one who makes me happy.” you say with your face in his chest. “And I only love you…so I’m here for you. Forever and always.” you looked up and smiled then he shouted “TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!” you laughed at how cute and silly he was. No matter what you knew Taehyung would always be your light.

Jimin:

He was kind of confused but you explained it a bit to him and he looked sad and reached over to caress your cheek. “I love you soo much…please don’t feel that way anymore.” his eyes that usually smile where full of sadness. He pulled you onto his lap and snuggled you. “I love you…Please sty happy.” he said with a broken voice. You held onto him “As long as I have you I will be okay”

Jungkook:

He had the most hurt look in his eyes. “I promise I will never let you feel that way again…” he kissed your forehead and carried you to the shared bedroom and laid you down. He laid down with you and pulled you to his chest. For a moment he was silent, the only thing you could hear was the strong pounding of his heart. “You hear that? it only beats for you…remember that” he said while looking into your eyes.

hope you enjoy!!!

-jewel

haileestnfld  asked:

How has evolved your friendship/relationship with Keegan?

Keegan and I have been through a lot. We started out as co-stars habitually speaking to each other on set, we grew to friends who felt comfortable texting in the middle of the night, he became my best friend who I talked to about my past and developed inside jokes with. Making that transition from friendship to romance was the scariest and best decision I’ve ever made, and I’ll never regret it. Keegan’s place in my life has never once wavered, even if we’ve hit some rough spots occasionally. Sometimes we’ve needed breaks to figure things out but I’ve always known, and I hope he’s always known, that my light is forever on for him and that he’s my safe place to land, for infinity and beyond. @supitskeegs

Luke Imagine: Trying to Fix a Divorce

Author: Rhine

-

There was a time when you thought he loved you.

He had fooled you - he really did, with his soft forehead kisses and gentle caresses and quiet I love you’s that acted as a key to your heavily guarded heart. He opened it; cracked the safe open after patient waiting, and you let him.

You let his words fool you, you let the light in his bright blue eyes blind you, you let his touch suck out any doubts you had. You let him love you. You let yourself love him.

You let him take your heart. 

And in a way, you set yourself up for letting him break it.

You thought you had something real with Luke. Something tangible, something indestructible, something infinite. You let yourself believe that what you had with Luke was love, that what you found was a once in a lifetime treasure.

He had tricked you well, you admit. He tricked you very well indeed.

He had fooled you with his first I love you, blue eyes twinkling, smiling bashfully as he waiting for your response. He had fooled you with every kiss, every laugh, every hug, every long conversation at three in the morning, bodies intertwined in a bed, talking about the universe and where the two of you fit. He had fooled you when he got down on one knee and told you that he wanted to be yours forever; that he’d be the happiest man on earth, that you completed him, that you were the one. He had fooled you exceptionally well on the day you walked towards him swathed in white, his bright blue eyes glimmering with tears - I vow to love you for the rest of my existence; for this life, for the next, forever because I finally know now my place in this universe, and it’s next to you.

He had fooled you very well that night. That night with him in his perfectly pressed tie and beam on his lips, that night where you danced with him for hours, where he leaned down to kiss you at the altar and took you for his own. The night where skin met skin, where you marked every crevice of his body as your own as he did the same to yours. The night where you joined in every way possible; the night where you had thought with a certainty in your bones, this is love.

You fell for it. You fell for it, every step of the way.

You thought your dreams were coming true. You thought you were living in some sort of fantasy when you married the man you loved - past tense - when you found out you were expecting, when you ultimately gave birth to the ray of sunshine that you would call your daughter. 

You thought you had it all. A loving husband. A beautiful daughter. A perfect family. 

But you learned the hard way that all things fade with time.

Your love for your precious daughter seemed to grow as Luke’s love for you diminished.

Your daughter was the light of your life - she was a part of you and you loved caring for her, no matter how tired you were. There was something in her bright blue eyes that pulled you to her, exactly like Luke’s that magnetized you. 

You cared for her. You fed her and sang to her and you looked over her and played with her and read to her and you loved her with your whole heart, just like how you loved Luke.

But that changed. At least for him.

He started disappearing more and more, going to this place with the boys then going there to record then this gig and that venue - and you understood. You understood that it was his job, and this was what came with it. 

But when Luke started coming back later and later, with photos on this website and that program of him and the boys out partying or seen in this club - you knew that wasn’t part of the job.

You confronted him about it, of course - but it only resulted in whisper arguments that hurt you more than screaming matches because you could hear the steady fury in his voice, an anger and weariness in his blue eyes that weren’t there before.

I’m just trying to have some fun.

And you’d laugh mirthlessly, eyes rolling.

I get that, Luke. I really do. But you’ve got other priorities now - a family. There are some other things that come before partying and drinks.

He never did change.

-

Luke had loved you in the beginning. He had loved you and your daughter, and the first few years were filled with happiness and joy and clumsy attempts at parenting that ended with laughter and stories to tell friends and family as a good dinnertime joke.

Your daughter’s first words. Her first step. Buying all the toys in the world for her and baking in the kitchen and singing to her on Sunday mornings. Hearing her chatter on and on about the strangest things that brought the both of you smiles in the morning and snuggling in close with each other - as a family - at night. 

But as the months turned into years, it was as if his love dragged out. As if it was wearing thin. 

You loved him infinitely, with all of your heart. But it was different for him.

You didn’t notice it at first. It was subtle, like soft waves starting to change direction. It wasn’t until some more time passed did you realize you were going the wrong way the whole entire time.

Luke was drifting away from you - slowly and surely, drifting away from the boy who smiled at you with innocent dimples in his cheeks, drifting away the man who told you he loved you and your daughter, lively blue eyes identical to hers as he played games with her, as he gazed into yours. 

He was drifting away, and wherever he was going, it was clear that he wanted to go without you, despite his previous promises.

I promise I’ll always be by your side - forever and through infinity, through thick and thin, I’ll be there.

Always? Always. 

Going, going…

… gone.

-

Sometimes he left for tour without a single phone call home.

And it hurt you when your beautiful daughter asked you when’s daddy coming back home?

You didn’t know. You didn’t know if he ever came back home again; not when there was something hollow in his eyes, lacking warmth, lacking love.

Soon, you always answered. Daddy’ll be back home soon. 

Soon, the Luke that you loved would walk back through those doors with a smile on his lips and something sincere in his heart. Soon, the man that you loved would come back to you, just like he promised.

Soon. 

-

You didn’t want to.

You really didn’t.

But you had to.

You had fretted over it for nights and weeks and months of tossing and turning on your bed, alone. You were conflicted and lost, and every time you sought warmth or comfort or guidance, you would reach out and find that you were alone.

Just cold sheets and a spot where someone else should be.

Luke.

And in the end, it was that empty space that echoed your decisions. 

It’s for the best.

-

You deserved better.

You really did. You deserved someone who would help you do the dishes at night, someone to take turns doing the laundry, someone to help you fix the broken television or to help you clean the house on Sundays. You deserved someone to hold you to sleep at night and someone to come home to with a smile on their face, waiting. You deserved soft kisses on the lips after a long day of work and a long shower and cuddle sessions that melted all your worries away.

You weren’t the best person, you knew. But you thought you deserved at least that much.

And if not, then your daughter deserved better.

She deserved a father who would pick her up in his arms and carry her on his shoulders in the park. She deserved a father who would play tea party with her and a father who would kiss her head hello when he came home. She deserved a father who would protect her from the monsters under her bed, a father to watch over her as she skipped to school.

She, at the very least, deserved a phone call from her supposed father telling her where he was. Telling her that he missed her. That he loved her. That he’d be back soon.

Your daughter deserved a father.

Not a stranger who shared the same blue eyes that were always so distant and far away, even when he was in the same room.

-

You left the papers on his manager’s desk, folded into a white envelope with his name neatly printed on it.

You had already signed your name, contacted all the right people, went to all the meetings.

Your hands shook when you left it on the table, hesitating for a few minutes. Your breaths came out shaky and you clutched your bag so hard your knuckles nearly turned white.

But you steeled yourself and placed the envelope in the middle of his desk - to Mr. Luke Hemmings - and turned around, leaving before anyone else saw you there.

You didn’t have a place there any more.

You didn’t have a place in Luke’s heart any more.

Well, now he didn’t have a place in yours.

-

When’s daddy coming back again? 

You held your daughter’s hand, suitcase in tow. She trailed beside you, her little pink suitcase rolling behind her, bumping in between the cracks of the sidewalk. 

You had packed and left, spending the past three weeks putting your things in neat, organized boxes and shipping them to your family’s house, where you planned to stay for the next few months until you could find a place of your own.

That wasn’t home any more.

Daddy’s not coming back for a while, baby.

Your words are soft and gentle, and you try to bite back the tears. Your daughter still believed she had a father when you saw him leave a long, long time ago.

You told her the two of you would be moving - going to a new home and staying with some family for the time being.

Of course, this was met with a few temper tantrums and tears and questions that you had to painfully answer - alone, alone, always so painfully alone - but she complied. She bounced back. She always did.

And you would too.

You just didn’t know how to exactly tell your little daughter that Luke wouldn’t be there any more. 

Why not?

The question is simple, innocent; punctuated by two, bright eyes that looked up at you with the utmost naivete. 

It hurts you more than any wounded glare could.

Daddy’s busy. He’s very busy and he won’t be coming back.

Your words are light despite the burden on your shoulders.

Daddy’s never home any more. I miss daddy.

You start to feel the weight seep into you, and it leaves you weak, barely able to move on. Barely able to bring the last set of suitcases to your family home.

These past few weeks have been so, so tiring. 

You tried to smile for your family, your friends, your daughter. But it never came out right any more. Not ever since Luke started to fade away.

There’s one more thing he took.

I miss him too. 

Your words are quiet, but your daughter still hears them, her hands squeezing yours comfortingly.

But mommy’s here now. Mommy’s always going to be here for you, okay? I’m not going anywhere. Mommy’s not going to leave like daddy.

Your words start to shake with tears, but you’re not sure your daughter hears it. You hope she doesn’t. This hasn’t been easy on her too, whether or not she knows the full picture - it hasn’t been easy on either of you.

You had to stay strong. Just like you always did.

Promise?

You remember when you asked the very same thing to Luke, the same hopeful lilt in your voice as your daughter’s, so many years ago when he said he would stay by your side forever.

Oh, how things have changed.

But you haven’t. You still kept your promises, and though your heart is heavier guarded now, you still kept your word with your whole heart. 

Though the positions are reversed now, you aren’t one to let someone you love down.

Promise.

-

He comes home to a half-empty house.

Half a closet full of clothes. Bedrooms bare, walls of pictures and drawings stripped. Bathroom counters left half-touched, kitchen empty.

It was eerie - how half the house was living, as if it was half-breathing, struggling to cling on to life. As if it was half dead already.

He’s confused and dazed and shocked, the silence turning numb in his ears.

When he picks up the call from his manager, the explanation falls on him like weights, pulling him down as he drowned in the emptiness.

Divorce.

He asks again, just to check. It can’t be true. It couldn’t be true.

Not when you were still in this very house six months ago, a half-smile on your lips and a happy beam on your daughter’s face.

(it was always a half-smile. the house was always half-empty - he just didn’t notice. he was the empty half, and now that he was truly alone, he sees just what he’s done.)

But that was six months ago. 

Luke calls you, and your phone rings once, twice, three times.

You see the caller ID, and you know it’s him. You’ve been waiting for it. 

You knew he was coming back today, sitting on the couch biting your nails, a nervous wreck.

But when you picked up the phone, you were calm, cool, and collected.

Unfeeling, despite the soft flickers that sparked once you heard his voice again. 

Is this some sick joke?

You brace yourself, telling yourself to stand firm. 

You remember the empty bed. You remember the questions of where’s daddy from your daughter’s lips, and you remember the loneliness that ate you inside out every night.

Does it look like I’m laughing, Luke? I can hardly remember the last time I've smiled because of you.

There’s silence. 

You can hear him breathing on the other end; sharp, quick intakes of breaths as if he forgot how to breathe. As if he was suffocating.

Suffocating from the emptiness.

When he speaks again, his next words are cracked, broken. Chipped on the edges and hoarse when they leave his throat.

Come back home.

You can’t hold back a mirthless laugh, your voice twisted in a way that you can barely recognize.

Can’t you see, Luke? I was always there. Always waiting. It was you who never came back. You were the one who never came back, and guess what? 

You take a deep breath, trying to pace yourself and refrain from letting all the bitterness and anger seep into your voice.

I’m finding a new home. 

He’s silent, as still as stone. He doesn’t say a word, and you didn’t expect him to.

You hang up the phone, and Luke can’t help but to think that the flat line sounds a lot like a final goodbye.

-

request tweets, imagines, & gifs here!

I basically cried a lot because of the fact that this bitch ass old motherfucker became president. I cannot think of any reason this might be good for anyone though I’ve seen many turkish politicians claiming him to be the better president than clinton when it comes to the turkish population. My future and dreams have probably been completely shuttered by something this stupid. I will still try my best and never chill on the fact that this orange faced bitch can change my plans and destroy whatever I wanted to create myself in my future. One good thing about this situation is that I was never more thankful to have so many great people around me whose existence in my life are of great importance and significance that I would rather spend my time with them than being in other places on my own. At this point, and this sounds a bit like a speech after you win an award, but it is almost the same thing as he is the best award I’ve ever had metaphorically without doing anything to deserve this or never going to be able to deserve someone as perfect as him, I want to thank my boyfriend, the person who has been teaching me so much in the last months. The person, who has been showing me what unconditional love means, what it means to really have someone by your side who protects you, who every single day and minute gives you the feeling of being wanted and loved and desired. He has been showing me how beautiful life can be and I am so grateful to have someone like him. I have never been so grateful in my life at all. I don’t want to talk so much about him because he is only mine and I’m always afraid of someone trying to get what is mine because of jealousy and I wouldn’t even be mad at the fact that someone would want to have him after I talk about him, I would even understand if someone falls in love with him just by me telling you about him cause there is no way not to fall in love with him. He is simply perfect without even trying. He always has the perfect words to make my heart melt, to make me feel happy. I am not an easy person and how he handles me and how much love he gifts me is unbelievable. I am so thankful for everything he has ever done for me and I cannot thank him enough for his patience. He has the biggest heart out of everyone I’ve ever met and I can’t believe how lucky I am to have this man in my life let alone to be able to marry this man one day.
If you read this, I promise I will always stay by your side as long as you love me I will make things work and try my best to meet your love and effort.
I love you, so unconditionally

Neither space nor time
knows boundaries,
all is relative and
ever growing into infinity;
it’s an endless void
filled with energy
resonating
on different frequencies.
   
There will be no end,
there wasn’t a begin,
there’s no smallest
(or largest)
particle,
no final destination.
   
Yes, I believe in forever,
and as much as I believe
in the infinity of space –
I believe in you and me.
So I picked my words
carefully
when I told you, ‘always’.
   
Now look into my eyes
and tell me, honestly, 
if you can see me flinch,
or if I cause you to think
I take these words lightly.
  
I’ll love you for all eternity.
—  Always, by M.A. Tempels © 2015
Those Times When Root Used Her Weapons Of Choice On Shaw...

…..Terms of endearment, so to speak? ;)


Except that time when Shaw just couldn’t help herself….

Awww….these two are totally meant for each other. They have SO MUCH in common! ;)

They belong together. ‘Til infinity & beyond.

#TeamShoot #relationshipgoals

There are a few different types of forevers.

There are forevers that eventually die and are forgotten about, and yet the spirit of their ideas and their themes linger in the air of existence long after any trace of them continues. Those forevers are important. They shape the world today, and they’ll continue to shape it for as long as it may exist.

There are forevers that last split seconds, encased by the fabric of time. The universe itself has captured these forevers. You have not heard of them, because most have long since passed, and the ones that will be created in the future won’t last long enough for you to give them notice. But they’ll have garnered the attention of some force we don’t have a title for, and will thus be a forever despite conditions that try to make them anything but.

There are forevers that continue long after their deaths; ones that fight against memory or disbelief or any of the other weathering elements of time. Those could be called the true forevers, if one wanted to name such unnamable concepts. They transcend time and space and logic, and they’re incredibly rare, and immeasurably valuable. Hoard them like diamonds. Hoard these forevers.

There are the forevers of lovers, of friends, of heroes, of villains, of tears, of smiles, of significance, of insignificance, small forevers, big forevers.

There are a few different types of forevers.

And then there’s Dean and Castiel.

“Dean?”

“Mm?”

Keep reading

ALEXGASXARTH’S FIRST FOLLOW FOREVER

Okay, so to celebrate me reaching 500 followers (thank you so much ily all <3), I’m gonna do a follow forever! Please note that this was kinda rushed (as can be seen from the header whoops), so please don’t hate me if I forgot you. I will have forgotten someone. Sorry. Also, I don’t know how other people do it, but I’m only putting people here who I’m in mutuals with :D

A

alex-gaskarth-is-jesus | alex-gaskarths-leg-thing alexistroubleinatanktop | alexjackzackrian | alexsexyasskarth | alexsgaskarths | all-time-crier-for-jack | all-time-lowver | alltimelowaremyfuckingheroes | alltimeposers |  always-alltimelow atl-infinity

B-D

bands-whalefetus | barakat-queen | baraslut-loves-gayskank | because-jalex | boobs4jack | bring-me-alex-gaskarth | d-a-y-dreamaway | damned-if-i-do-barakat | doitforparamore | dontfgkngpanic 

E-I

ever-ything | feelmyfeelswithme | fuckedbarakat | gaskarths | gerardallthefuckingwayheartsinbaltimore | hvmanwreckage | i-fucked-gaskarthismychemicalromancebackyet | isthatmaddy | iwantphil

J-P

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R-#

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Thank you!

I just can’t imagine how Levi is… without Erwin. Now. After all of this. I can’t imagine his pain, it’s just all of our fans’ pain multiplied by infinity.
So many years, shoulder to shoulder. The unlimited, unconditional, sincere, genuine trust. Sacrifice. Devotion. Life, real fucking life. Shit, Erwin gave him as much as might not give the entire population inside the walls.
I’m just … empty now. Sorry, I’m off.

Erwin will always be in our hearts. And in the Levi’s heart, too. Forever.

If forever is made up of nows
then I want to relive this moment
right here,
over & over again,
until we both reach eternity
together:

in our little infinity,
I always say your name like a beginning
& you permanently embrace me like genesis

we greet each other
with open arms,
endlessly

after a lifetime of yesterdays,
we have achieved
immortality

because I have everything
I’ve ever yearned for

today.

—  leonormorrowinspired by Emily Dickinson, “forever is composed of nows” & John Green, “some infinities are bigger than other infinities”

suaine-deactivated20140607  asked:

I would like to know more about disapproving-dad-eyebrows!Derek and his and Stiles' hilarious adventures in parenting a rebellious teen. All the teen angst that's really teen angst and not people dying. Just illicit romance and worrying about grades and that one super annoying teacher and crushes and broken hearts and happiness and Derek and Stiles always being there, constant, safe, forever. <3

oh man, imagine their eldest, let’s call her Matilda, calling infinity dibs on the bathroom, and their middle kid, Seb, sitting outside the door making really irritating noises to drive her out, and the twins running circles around their bedroom first thing in the morning. it leads to total chaos ever morning, and they lie together listening to it for a few minutes each day, grinning stupidly at how lucky they are sometimes, but other times with the pillows over their faces and shoving at each other like “it’s your turn” “no, it’s your turn, you deal with the monsters!”

Keep reading

Field of Roses

Other parts can be found here:

Part 1

http://robbiekay-stalker.tumblr.com/post/92619586491/field-of-roses

Part 2

http://robbiekay-stalker.tumblr.com/post/92727636186/field-of-roses

~ ~ ~

Part Three

For the next two weeks, all you’ve done is mope around, cry, and eat ice cream. You’ve been ignoring Robbie’s texts and apologies, and all of the ‘get over it’s and ‘don’t worry sweety’s of your parents. You could never get over it. Robbie, your best friend, just broke a promise and lied to you. On your birthday. He even had the guts to ditch you.

One day you got a text from Robbie:

‘Meet me at our special place…

Please, I’m begging you.

XOXO Robbie’

It read. Your special place was the old pavilion in the park garden, it was surrounded by a gate so that only your families would have access to it, your parents had bought it for you when you where very little, that pavilion was where you guys would spend the whole day together, playing tag, hide and seek… or sometimes just laying on the grass and watch the stars twinkle in the moonlight. You sighed deeply, contemplating on wether to show up or just ditch him. You don’t know why, but you texted him back:

'This better be good Kay.

I’m heading there right now.”

-X’

You grabbed your coat and texted your parents on where you were going and that you’d be back before sundown, and of course they said that it was okay with them.

* * *

Once you arrived at the garden’s gates, you grabbed your key and unlocked it, shutting it behind you as you entered.

There he was, sitting on the steps of the pavilion, with messy hair and red puffy eyes. Had he been crying?

You walked up to him and bid him a small smile.

“Hey.” You whispered.

His head snapped up and he smiled. “Hey, I didn’t think you’d actually show up.” He said patting the seat next to him. You gladly took his offer sat down beside him. After a few awkward minutes, you finally spoke up. “How are you and Vanessa?” his smile vanished and he looked down. “We broke up.” “What?! Why?” He sighed. “I found the photo.”

You gave Robbie a confused look but suddenly realized what photo he meant. He meant ‘the’ photo. The one you had snapped on the day of the ‘incident’. You sighed, “I’m so sorry Robbie.” and patted his back.

“It’s fine. But, why didn’t you tell me?”

Your fingers suddenly became interesting and you started to fumble with them. You felt him grab your chin and forced you to look at him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

You sighed once again; Had he been clueless to the feelings you had for him? Did he even see the signs you shot towards his direction?

“Because you were just so happy Robbie. I didn’t want to ruin your happiness. If I would’ve told you that she was cheating on you you would’ve been heartbroken. And that’s the last thing I want to have, to see my best friend heartbroken again.”

It was his turn to sigh now. “Thank you…”

You gave him a confused glance, “For what?”

“Being there.”

You didn’t quite understand what he meant, that was until he cupped your face and smashed his lips on yours. Your eyes flew open with the sudden move Robbie had pulled off, but you felt yourself start to melt into the kiss.

Robbie licked your lip asking you for entrance, which you gladly granted. He caressed your tongue gently, earnings few whimpers and moans from you. You felt him smirk against the kiss as his hands travelled lower and lower until they reached your ass. You moaned as you felt him toy with the waistband of your jeans. Meanwhile his tongue was now fighting yours for dominance, and of course ending up with him winning. You pulled away after a few moments in the need to breathe.

“I love you (Y/N). And all it took me was 3 heartbreaks and 19 years to realize it.” He said pressing his forehead against yours, staring directly at your eyes.

“I love you too Robbie. And all it took me was a single heartbeat to fall for you.” You smiled and gave him a quick peck on the lips.

“I love you (Y/N), Always and Forever.”

“Always and Forever.” You whispered and reconnected your lips.

From that moment onward, both of you knew that one day you’ll be spending the rest of your lives together and that you’d love each other for the rest of your lives.

And you did, a few years later Robbie had asked you to marry him, and walking down the aisle on the arm of your father, and saying your vows in front of the altar was the highlight of your life. Soon, you gave birth and had two kids. You raised them together, and spent the time as a family, enjoying the littlest things you do, even the smallest details. Eventually, you had to let them go. You had grandchildren, even great grandchildren. Yes, there were days when times were tough, but you got through it with him, you’d go through hell and back three times as long as you were with Robbie. For the rest of your life, you spent it with each other. He was there with you at the hospital, where you took your last breath, gave him your last kiss, and said your last I love yous. He died shortly after you did, your tombs next to each other. And when he died, you were there to greet him, your youth restored and you were happier than ever, finally being reunited with your loved one in the after life.

“Hey there Robbie.” You said as you greeted him.

“Hello love.” He whispered as he cupped your face with one hand and grabbed your waist with the other, slamming his lips against yours.

Even after death you loved each other and found no other. Robbie spent the rest of infinity with you, and like he said and promised, loved you always and forever. You watched over your family in heaven, where you spent the rest of eternity… Together.

Hayes Imagine For Anonymous

                                           You and I

“Y/N, come on we have to leave” You heard your boyfriend, Hayes yell

“I’m coming” You said checking you had everything you needed to go on tour with the magcon babes

“Need any help?” He asked

“Yes, please” You said

“Okay” He said grabbing the suitcases for you

“Thanks” You said opening the door for him

“Anything for my princess” He said as he gave you a kiss on the cheek

While you and the Hayes put the suitcases in the back of the car you asked him:

“When are we going to tell the boys about us?”

“As soon as we get to the hotel.” He said

“Okay” You said happily

When you and Hayes got into the back seats of the car you saw Mrs.Elizabeth, Nash’s mom and Nash.

“Hey Mrs. Elizabeth and Nash” You said

“Hey sweetie” Mrs. Elizabeth

“Hey Y/N, excited for Magcon?” Nash asked

“Yep” You said

After 20 minutes you and the guys finally arrived at the airport.

“Bye mom” Hayes and Nash said at the same time

“Bye guys” Mrs.Elizabeth replied

“Bye Mrs.Elizabeth” You said getting out of the car

“Bye Y/N, please take of the guys” She said

“I will” You said

“Thanks” She said and then left

After saying goodbye you and the guys went through security and everything, Then you realized that your plane wasn’t boarding until an hour. So Nash had decided to film a video.

“Hey guys so today I am here with Hayes and with Y/N”

“And we are heading to Magcon Atlanta” You said

“Yep. That’s right” Hayes said

40 minutes after filming crazy stuff you heard:

“Flight 257 is now boarding” A lady said through the speaker

“Let’s go guys”Nash said

When you got on the plane you sat in between Nash and Hayes because Hayes took the window seat. During the entire flight, Nash was editing the video that you guys filmed and you and Hayes were hearing music together until you felled asleep on his shoulder. Then you heard someone say:

“Babe,wake up” Hayes said

“I’m up. I’m up.” You said rubbing your eyes

After all of you got out the plane you went to pick up your suitcases. After picking them up, you took your phone out and went too your social medias. While you were scrolling down on your twitter you saw that Nash posted a picture of Hayes resting his head on yours and you resting your head on his shoulder. Along with the picture he wrote “Aren't they cute?”. Then you went through your instagram and saw that Hayes posted a picture of you resting your head on his shoulder. After you finished checking your social medias you then put your phone away and asked:

“When will the driver come?”

“Ummm. He’s right there” He said pointing to a black limo

“Okay let’s go” Hayes said grabbing your suitcases

As you entered the limo you saw the guys already inside

“Look who is here” Taylor said really loud

“Hey guys” You said as you sat down next to Dillon

“Why didn’t you tell us that you were coming?”Shawn asked

“It was a surprise” You said

“Oh well”Aaron said

Then Nash and Hayes entered the limo and the driver started driving all of you too the hotel.

“So which person is in which room?” You asked

“In room 1 we have Taylor, me and Matt. Room 2 we have Shawn, Jack G and Jack J. Room 3 we have Cameron,Nash,and Jacob. In room 4 we have Hayes,Y/N and Dillon” Carter said as he read from a piece of paper

In the inside you were really happy because you got too share a room with your boyfriend and as well with your best friend Dillon. When you got too the hotel you were really excited to tell the guys about you and Hayes.

“Guys can all of you come into my room”Hayes yelled

“What is ist?” Matt asked

“We have news to tell you guys”Hayes said

“Okaaaaaay…”Jack G said

“Where are the rest of the boys?”Hayes asked

”They’re coming” Jacob said

“Guys hurry up”Nash yelled

“Okay, we’re here”Cameron said as he sat down on the floor

“So as you know me and Y/N, have been pretty close for the past 6 months and…” Hayes said but the Jack J cut him off

“AND?”Jack J said

“We are dating”You said fast but loud

“Is this a joke or what?”Nash asked making you sad

“We are not joking” Hayes said

“Guys, you are way too young to be dating”Matt said

“Yeah Matt is right. I mean Hayes is only 14 and Y/N is only 13”Shawn said

“But love has no age”You said

“Well I think that you shouldn’t be dating because you are too young and you need to live life”Carter said

“I agree” The rest of the guys said

When you heard that you felt a thousand tears that were about come but you didn’t want the guys too see you cry so you just ran out of the bedroom.

“Y/N, wait” Hayes said but you ignored him

You ran and ran in tears. You had no idea where you were going but you stopped at a park to get air and you sat down on a swing. You then saw a shadow behind you so you turned around and you saw Hayes standing in front of you.

“Babe why did you leave?”He asked you

“I just couldn’t take the fact that they said that stuff”You replied

“”But who cares what they said?”He asked holding your hands

“I do because they are all like my brothers”You said

“But they are not involved in this relationship”He said as he wiped your tears away with his thumb

“You’re right”You said and hugged him

“I love you and no one can’t change that”He said

“I love you too” You said

“C’mon lets go back to the hotel”He said as he broke the hug and grabbed your hands

When you went back to the hotel and opened the door you saw the boys sitting on the floor with puppy eyes.

“Y/N please forgive us”Nash said

“Yeah we should of never said that”Matt said

“Please”All the guys begged

“I forgive all of you”You said

“Yey!Group hug”Cameron said as all the boys ran up to and hugged you

“Okay guys, don’t touch her”Hayes said as he pulled you away from the guys

“Just to let you known, no matter what happens I will always love Y/N” Haye said

holding your hand

“I love you”You said

“I love you to” He said and kissed you

“AWWWWWWW” All they guys said

“I’ll always love you” Hayes said looking at you

“Forever and ever?”You asked

“For Infinity and Beyond”He said and kissed you

“Guys get a room”Nash said

“You get a girlfriend” You replied making every to laugh

4

I got a little bored but I had a permanent marker quotes and newspaper. Strait and Fast. Maybe OKAY will be our ALWAYS. The labyrinth blows but I choose it. Amour aime aimer amour. Gotta stop looking up at the sky. The marks humans leave are too often scars. It is so hard to leave until you leave. The not-knowing would not keep me from caring. That’s the thing about pain it demands to be felt. Some infinities are bigger than others. Forever is composed of nows. The towns were paper but the memories were not. Not following her was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. You will go to the paper towns and never come pack