this-is-three-or-four-years-old

So I just watched the Luthor’s episode with my little brother (he’s nine). He is really bad with names, so he jokingly started calling Alex and Maggie Lesbian one and Lesbian two. 
While we were watching the scene were Kara goes to Lena’s office to show her the last article about her innocence in everything. My brother turns around and with an extremely serious face tells me “Lesbian three and Lesbian four”.
So don’t even try to tell me that the subtext isn’t there because even a nine year old kid catches it. 

i’m laughing at the concept of immortal fake ah crew deciding to hide their immortality and this leading to shenanigans 

  • like jeremy fucking laughs the first time somebody shoots him in the chest, just a full-blown giggle you’d expect from a four year old, and then he’s like oh shit right and falls over dramatically like something out of the three stooges
  • gavin gets “killed” one weekend and then a few days later his killer sees him at a fucking stop-n-shop or something and gavin spends a full twenty minutes convincing the guy that he’s his own twin
  • michael gets stabbed in the stomach and is immediately like “i just GOT this FUCKING SHIRT– i mEAN OW, OH NO, I’VE BEEN STABBED, I’M DEFINITELY BLEEDING OUT RIGHT NOW, THAT’S WHAT’S HAPPENING, OH THE INHUMANITY”
    (”laying it on a little thick there, michael,” lindsay says)
  • ray gets shot and is basically like sweet naptime and fucking very carefully settles down on the sidewalk and strips off his hoodie and bundles it under his head like a pillow and dozes off
    ray does this every time he gets injured under the pretense that it might have killed me if i was mortal you don’t know (ray you got shot in the foot wake the hell up)
  • whenever jack gets “killed” and is later seen by the person who killed her, she staunchly insists she’s a ghost (”i’m here to haunt your ass for the rest of eternity, fucker”)
  • geoff and ryan get taken by a rival gang and ryan is shot in the chest; ryan immediately looks down at himself with a sad face and goes “aww.” (he’s wearing his “normal guy” shirt; geoff’s kind of glad it’s ruined now)
    geoff gives ryan a pointed look and ryan blinks, then clutches at his chest and starts to fucking monologue
    “Had I but time–as this fell sergeant, death, is strict in his arrest–”
    (”ryan, what.”)
    “But let it be. Horatio, I am dead–”
    (”then fucking die already, what are you doing, is that hamlet”)
    “aND IN THIS HARSH WORLD DRAW THY BREATH IN PAIN TO TELL MY STORY–”
    geoff ends up wrestling the gun from the gang member so he can shoot ryan again
    look, ryan has to use that theater experience somehow
Books with well-written, canonically autistic characters

If you’re autistic, you’re probably tired of the only representation you see being a four-year-old little brother, or mysterious eccentric savant. I know I am, and that’s why I’ve decided to compile this list of three-dimensional autistic people in books. This was originally intended to be a masterpost, but there aren’t really enough for a masterpost, so feel free to add on if you’d like!

On the Edge of Gone- Corinne Duyvis

     Book Description- January 29, 2035. That’s the day the comet is scheduled to hit—the big one.

 Denise and her mother and sister, Iris, have been assigned to a temporary shelter near their hometown of Amsterdam to wait out the blast, but Iris is nowhere to be found, and at the rate Denise’s addicted mother is going, they’ll never reach the shelter in time.Then a last-minute encounter leads them to something better than a temporary shelter: a generation ship that’s scheduled to leave Earth behind and colonize new worlds after the comet hits.

 But each passenger must have a practical skill to contribute. Denise is autistic and fears that she’ll never be allowed to stay. Can she obtain a spot before the ship takes flight? What about her mother and sister?

When the future of the human race is at stake, whose lives matter most?

     My Review- I really, really, love this book. I’ve recommended it to everyone I know. Denise is Black, making this the first book I’ve found, and possibly the only book so far, to have a Black autistic character. Her autism is never seen as something that makes her lesser, and it’s a part of her she firmly refuses to apologize for, and even something that helps her out a few times. She’s also unquestionably a hero- putting her lives at risk to save others, and defying authority to do so. Her sister is trans, and it’s addressed very respectfully- she’s her own person, and an extraordinary one at that. It’s not a huge deal, and you never even find out her deadname, which is super nice. As an added bonus, the author herself is autistic! I would rip out my own heart for a sequel. 

In the Absence of Light- Adrienne Wilder

 Book Description-  For years Grant Kessler has smuggled goods from one end of the world to the next. When business turns in a direction Grant isn’t willing to follow he decides to retire and by all appearances he settles down in a nowhere town called Durstrand. But his real plan is to wait a few years and let the FBI lose interest, then move on to the distant coastal life he’s always dreamed of.

Severely autistic, Morgan cannot look people in the eye, tell left from right, and has uncontrolled tics. Yet he’s beaten every obstacle life has thrown his way. And when Grant Kessler moves into town Morgan isn’t a bit shy in letting the man know how much he wants him.

While the attraction is mutual, Grant pushes Morgan away. Like the rest of the world he can’t see past Morgan’s odd behaviors.

Then Morgan shows Grant how light lets you see but it also leaves you blind. And once Grant opens his eyes, he loses his heart to the beautiful enigma of a man who changes the course of his life.

 My Review- This book was really refreshing. I can’t put into words how much it means to me to have an autistic character, especially a high-support one, written as a love interest. The book is told from Grant’s point of view, not Morgan’s, and he holds some really ableist viewpoints earlier on, but Morgan doesn’t hesitate to put him (or anyone else) in their places. I loved his snark and how he plays off people’s assumptions to put them in their places. Warnings for graphic descriptions of past abuse, and ableism from the characters and some unintentional ableist language (i.e. “severely autistic”) from the author.

Anything But Typical- Nora Baskin

 Book Description- Jason Blake is an autistic 12-year-old living in a neurotypical world. Most days it’s just a matter of time before something goes wrong. But Jason finds a glimmer of understanding when he comes across PhoenixBird, who posts stories to the same online site as he does.

Jason can be himself when he writes and he thinks that PhoneixBird-her name is Rebecca-could be his first real friend. But as desperate as Jason is to met her, he’s terrified that if they do meet, Rebecca will only see his autism and not who Jason really is.

My Review- I was a little wary going in, expecting it to be an inaccurate and dismal portrayal of autism, but I was pleasantly surprised! Jason is well-written and really resonated with me- I’m not sure if the author herself is autistic, but she definitely did her homework. It’s nice to see an autistic character portrayed as creative, and the book also addresses issues with ‘cure’ mentality and pressure put on autistic people to act more socially acceptable.

deancas!au where:

  • cas takes a gap year after his bachelor’s degree and travels, deciding he’ll blog while doing it instead of keeping a formal travel journal
  • his ends up catching intense wanderlust and decides to make it two gap years
  • his blog takes off and people suddenly pay him to travel and then it becomes three years, then four, then five
  • on the sixth year, while in cambodia, he gets a call from kansas city general hospital
  • jimmy and amelia have been in a car crash. drunk driver. they were dead on arrival
  • they’ve named cas as two year-old claire’s guardian
  • cas is on the next flight out
  • but it turns out that you can’t actually travel while trying to take care of your niece and planning a funeral and looking for a job 
  • and then jimmy’s pos car decides not to start
  • enter dean winchester
  • dean, who takes one look at cas’s rumpled, dirty clothes and the bags under blues eyes and the squirming child in his arms and bends over backwards trying to make things easier for him
  • dean, who didn’t know jimmy personally but who’s sorry for cas’s loss, and offers to drive he and claire wherever they need while their car is in the shop “’cause we don’t have a car for you to use in the meantime, but you must be real busy so.”
  • which turns into dean chauffering cas to the grocery store and dropping him off at the mall with a ton of resumés while claire is at daycare
  • and then into cas and dean going out one night because dean insists cas needs some grown-up time
  • and then into cas inviting dean over so he and claire cook him the best indian food dean’s ever tasted even though cas insists it’s a cheap imitation
  • and then into cas and dean kind of… hanging out a lot. and maybe starting to touch a lot
  • and this, ultimately, culminates in a kiss on dean’s front porch
8

On September 5, 1986, Pan Am Flight 73 flying from Mumbai to the United States was hijacked by four armed men at an airport in Karachi, Pakistan. 22-year-old Neerja Bhanot, the senior flight pursor, was able to alert the cockpit crew as soon as the hijackers boarded the plane, allowing the three-member crew to escape through an overhead hatch. For 17 hours, Bhanot took charge of the situation on the plane. Her acts of courage and compassion included hiding the passports of the American citizens the hijackers were targeting, opening the airplane doors and helping passengers escape when the hijackers opened fire, and ultimately sacrificing her life while shielding three unaccompanied American children from a hail of bullets. For her bravery, which helped saved the lives of 359 passengers, Bhanot was posthumously awarded the Ashok Chakra Award, India’s highest award for bravery in the face of the enemy during peace time.

                                                                     - Neerja [2016]

Just saw some garbage written by people who are severely uninformed on honeybees. You can debate whether or not honey is vegan. I couldn’t care less! Just don’t say that beekeeping is harmful to bees. Also, don’t try to invalidate what honeybees do. I could write a novel on this, but I don’t have that kind of time. I’ve dedicated literally half of my life (a decade) to honeybees. I’m too tired from trying to save our planet to start up petty arguments with people on the internet. Hiding behind a screen gets you nowhere. Actions do. All I have to say is, don’t listen to the 14 year olds out here trying to sound like #intellectuals™ when they have done maybe three or four quick google searches. As someone who is legitimately informed on the subject, I can verify that they sound like dumbasses.

Carmilla Getting Used To Being Human: A Concept

Carmilla not being able to get a social security number or a passport because her birth certificate is on four-hundred year old parchment.

Carmilla getting hungry for the first time and not knowing what it is.

“Laura it feels as if there’s an anglerfish in my stomach.”

“You’re probably just hungry.”

“No, I ate yesterday, pass me that Sumerian book… I’ll figure this out.”

Laura taking her to a buffet and Carmilla losing her shit over different food.

“Oh man, oh shit, this is good! What are these things called again?”

“Macaroni cheese balls?”

“More like macaroni please balls, I’m going to get some more.”

Laura having to remind Carmilla she gets cold now, so she secretly keeps an eye on her in the morning to make sure she’s dressed weather appropriate for the day.

Carmilla disregarding this advice and catching the flu.

Carmilla crying because her nose is stuffed, her body hurts, she can’t stop throwing up and she hates being human.

Laura babying her and putting warm flannels over her head.

She changes her mind and loves being human because Laura takes the day off work when she’s sick to lie in bed with her and spoon feed her chicken soup.

Carmilla still purring like a cat when Laura bites her ear.

Laura doing stuff on purpose so she’ll purr because she finds it adorable.

Carmilla lying on the sofa reading Jean-Paul Sartre and Laura clambering up her body so she can just spend a little while listening to her heartbeat whilst dinner cooks.

4

Police brutality protests in Paris suburbs

Protests continue in the Paris suburbs over the assault of a young black man allegedly sodomized with a police baton.

The police accused “several hundred” individuals of various “acts of violence and damage.”

The rioting capped a week of nightly clashes in the northern Paris suburb over the treatment of Theo, a 22-year-old youth worker, who claims a police officer sodomized him with his baton after a stop-and-search check in a housing estate.

One officer has been charged with rape over the affair, and three others with assault. All four have been suspended from their duties.

Theo’s case has revived long-simmering frustrations over policing in immigrant communities, where young men accuse the police of repeatedly targeting them in aggressive stop-and-search operations and using excessive force during arrests.

The police for their part complain of being drawn into a cat-and-mouse game with delinquents and drug dealers operating out of housing estates. (AFP)

(Photos: Christian Hartmann/Reuters, Philippe Lopez/AFP/Getty Images [2], Geoffroy Van Der Hasselt/AFP/Getty Images)

See more images from the protests on Yahoo News.

Nesting Headcanons

-Omegas start nesting at a young age, like three or four years old, not so much because they need to but because they see their mother do it and they want to do it too. They start with small nests made just about anywhere, their bed, the floor, the couch, anywhere they feel like settling. Their little nests are always filled with small blankies and stuffed toys. At this age they don’t really care who is near their nest, they actually love having people around because they take pride in showing it off

-As Omegas start to get older, around twelve to fourteen years old, they become very dependent on the security and comfort their nest provides. They no longer like people being around it because they’re starting to be able to pick up the scents of other dynamics more and it makes them uncomfortable to have other scents on their nest besides their own

-When an Omega goes into heat for the first time, around fifteen to seventeen years old, they often make a new nest in a dark and enclosed place like their closet. Absolutely no one is welcome in or near that nest, with the exception of their Omega parent who checks in with food and water every now and then, since at this age the Omega usually won’t have a mate to take care of them yet

-Unmated Omegas always have a nest made, mated Omegas don’t though because they have an Alpha to provide them with warmth, comfort and security. Mated Omegas will usually only nest during heats, pregnancies, sicknesses and when they are extremely stressed or sad. Only their Alpha is allowed in these nests

-Whenever an Omega buys a new blanket they will insist that their Alpha needs to cuddle in it with them before it can be used for a nest, because it needs to have their scents rubbed into it

-Little Omega children excitedly building a big nest for them and their Alpha and Beta siblings in the living room on movie nights so they can all be cuddly and cozy together

-When Omegas are building a nest they become very zoned into it and even their Alpha has difficulty getting their attention until the Omega is satisfied with it

-An Alpha trying to be helpful and building a nest for their Omega who is about to go into heat, the Omega being very appreciative of the gesture but as soon as the Alpha leaves the room they rearrange everything the way they like it because Omegas are very particular about their nests

-Omegas are very uncomfortable with any Alpha scent besides their mates being anywhere near their nest, the scents of other Omegas can be comforting at times though

-During summer Omegas build their nests with light sheets and blankets and prefer to sleep naked because they love the soothing feel of the cool linens on their warm skin, but in winter they will use the thickest and softest blankets they can find while wearing fuzzy pajamas and snuggling as close to their Alpha as possible

-A small Omega building a nest and insisting that their Alpha parent cuddle in it with them, “like you do with mama!” and the Omega parent trying not to laugh as their big strong Alpha is cuddled into a tiny nest of stuffed animals and pink flowery blankets

3

Baby sun bears are born blind, hairless, and helpless, and are completely dependent on their mothers for their first three months.  Their mothers will carry them in their mouths or, unusually, by cradling them in their arms while they walk on their hind legs, a behaviour seen in no other bear species.  The cubs nurse from their mother for around 18 months, and will stay with her until they are two years old.  Females are ready to find a mate of their own by the time they are three, and males reach sexual maturity at around four.

8

My girlfriends and I talk a lot about feminism and the inequality between the way men and women are talked about, the kind of things we say are, ‘Why is it mischievous, fun and sexy if a guy has a string of lovers that he’s cast aside; loved and left? Yet if a woman dates three or four people in an eight-year period she is a serial dater and it gives some 12-year-old the idea to call her a ‘slut’ on the internet?’ It’s not the same for boys, it just isn’t and that’s a fact.”

“One for sorrow, two for joy,
three for a girl and four for a boy,
five for silver, six for gold,
seven for a secret never to be told.”

(Some old, british children’s rhyme about magpies that has been stuck in my mind for years.)

I saw a lot of Henry for inktober and jumped on the train- but instead of the usual crows and ravens, I decided to give some attention to a bird that gets lot less appreciation than its older brothers of the ravens- the magpie!

So, well, Henry is trying to teach his little friend how to sing, but even though crows, ravens and magpies belong to the group of singing birds, which contains robins, blue tits and blackbirds too, they are not really the most talented singers.

Lila Kalis is a 5-year-old with an uncanny ability to race cars. Her father, pro skateboarder Josh Kalis, outfitted her Power Wheels with a custom chassis and an upgraded motor, and since then she’s been drifting and doing other insanely difficult driving techniques.

More info here: http://mashable.com/2015/12/12/little-girl-drifting-car/#VIN9_zmhSkqt

(little uncertain of her age right now - she started at like two or three, most stories say she’s three or four, but her Instagram says she’s five)

(thanks to Victoria for sending this in!)

“Shiro,” Keith breathes, completely and utterly floored.

Shiro, tiny Shiro, gasps. He scrambles at the back wall, pressing himself further into the corner as he stares up at the four shell-shocked Paladins with desperate, naked fear. He chokes out three lost and miserable words:

“Who are you?”

First glimpse of smol!Shiro from @butteredonions‘s killing-me-softly fic, The Size Of Our Actions. More forthcoming.

i will literally never forget the watching the season four premiere of the office like we spent a whole summer agonizing over whether or not jim and pam were FINALLY dating and then in the beginning my brother actually threw a pillow at the tv when it looked like they weren’t together and then they kISSED and i swear to god my whole family started screaming and hugging like we woke up my three year old sister lmao and my friend called me during the commercial break so we could yell about it and then we stayed on the line so we could scream every time they did anything like when they held hands we hit decibels that weren’t audible to humans and to this day i have never seen my brother literally flail about something the way he did on that fateful night in 2007

Some tourists in the Chicago Museum of Natural History are marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asks the guard, “Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?”
     
     The guard replies, “They are 3 million, four years, and six months old.”
     
     "That’s an awfully exact number,“ says the tourist. "How do you know their age so precisely?”
     
     The guard answers, “Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.”

You were sat at the back of the convention hall, your daughter on your knee, while Misha was doing his solo panel. You were going to be waiting in your room for him, but Annie insisted on watching her daddy on stage. You just prayed that he didn’t say anything that would scar her.

“Thanks for answering,” the fan at the mic said. “I love you.”

“I love you more,” your husband said into his mic, and your daughter took a deep breath.

“I love you most!” she called out, causing everyone around you to ‘awww’.

It’s something the three of you often said to one another, so her calling it to her father shouldn’t have surprised you as much as it did.

Misha’s eyes scanned the crowd as everyone continued to fawn over your four-year-old.

“Who is more cute than me?” he accused, causing you to laugh, getting to your feet with Annie on your hip.

“Your daughter,” you called back, making your way to the stage as his face lit up.

“I thought you were in the room?”

He grabbed Annie and she clung to him like a monkey, hanging from his side as he readjusted how to hold his mic.

“She wanted to see her daddy,” you shrugged, “And so did I.”

“Well get up on stage then,” he grinned, and you did as you were told, sitting in Misha’s chair. “Okay, now who has a question for my wife?”

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What Goes Around, Comes Around

Summary: Adult Henry and Regina have a talk the first time his adoptive daughter tells him that he’s not her father.

——————-

At thirty four years old Henry Mills knew that he’d never fallen in love with anything quicker and harder than he had for his daughter.

He’d never planned to adopt. It hadn’t been a goal or even a thought in his head at the time but the minute he’d laid eyes on her he knew. She would be his and he would be hers forever.

He’d only been twenty-three when he first met her mother. Barely out of college when they’d ran into each other but he easily became enraptured with her warm, honey-colored eyes and melodious laughter. Luisa had been her name and it was only on their third date that she’d first told him about her daughter. Naturally he’d been shocked and a little apprehensive but still undeterred. A few months later she’d finally let him meet her, her little Olivia. Dark chocolate eyes and chubby red cheeks, she’d wrapped her tiny finger around his and he knew there was no going back.

A week being a part of their lives taught him more about love than an entire lifetime of reading and writing about fairy tales.

Twelve years and a wedding later they’d still been blissful. He truly thought that he’d found his happily ever after. But of course he’d forgotten the most cardinal rule of life.

It’s often more tragic than you expect.

A car crash stole Luisa away from them. One irreversible moment and suddenly he found himself standing over her casket, surrounded by family, his hand holding onto his daughter’s.

It would only be the two of them from now on.

A fact that Olivia appeared to struggle with.

She missed her mother, that much was clear. And Henry tried as hard as he could to give her a safe place to grieve, a place with him but she’d pushed him away. They used to be so close but she wasn’t talking to him anymore, she wasn’t talking to anyone. Isolating herself from her friends and family. He made excuses for her and tried to give her space, but things came to a head one afternoon when he’d gotten a call from the school saying she’d never shown up. After hours of searching for her only for her to come home and walk past him as if nothing had ever happened he couldn’t help it. He lost it.

Within seconds they’d enter a screaming match and before he’d even seen it coming she’d yelled the words he knew he’d never forget.

“WHAT DO YOU CARE?! YOU’RE NOT EVEN MY FATHER!!”

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Her Heart Did Whisper

gift for @prongsno

A/N: Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays! I hope you had a wonderful time, and I hope you enjoy the gift. (Summary: Lily really really really really hates James Potter. It’s too bad she ends up on holiday with him).

Rating: K+/T

Word Count: 8715

-

All Lily wants is a moment of bloody peace. It’s been a day– she spilt a (thankfully cooling) cup of tea down the front of her blouse during breakfast, she walked in on Petunia and Vernon doing something as horrifying as it was unspeakable, she got stuck next to a drunk bloke on the Tube who wanted to break down the results of the Manchester United game in loud and excruciating detail for three stops, she accidentally deleted her carefully curated four-year-old aesthetic blog on Tumblr (they really needed to something about that blasted button), she had hit what felt like a bleak and insurmountable bout of writer’s block on her dissertation, and Mary just texted to say she was running half an hour late….so just, please, peace. It doesn’t seem like a tall order, but it must be because the universe has decided to throw a roadblock at her in the slick-haired pale-faced shape of her former best friend. She sees him at the same time he spots her, making hiding futile, though that doesn’t stop her from trying to slink as low in the leather seat as she possibly can, hoping vainly that her laptop obscures her from view.

It doesn’t work because, well, of course it doesn’t. She’s just considering chucking her peppermint hot chocolate into her face so that she gets unrecognisably burned when she hears a soft: “Is this seat taken?”

“What do you want, Sev?”

To his credit, Severus looks like he’s going to try play it casual for all of three seconds before his thin lips curl petulantly. “I want to talk to you, Lils, we never see each other anymore!”

“You can see me now, can’t you?”

“Lils–”

She glowers, cutting him off. “We don’t see each other because I don’t want us to Sev! I’m trying to avoid you.”

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