Clarke Griffin has been figure skating since before she could walk. She’s got style, she’s got grace – and she’s got a 6-foot-4 hockey captain for a rival. Bellamy Blake makes it his mission to get his team onto the ice every afternoon, and he doesn’t like to share. They’re constantly at each other’s throats, fighting over who should get more rink time.
So imagine if the Paladins, as a supposed-to-be “fun” group bonding activity, decided to have a Karaoke Night (idea courtesy of Lance) to beat the blues of missing home and to reacquaint Shiro with some of the popular music back on Earth.
I imagine that it would go something like this:
Pidge: ***Fiddling with the Altean audio technology*** Done! Okay Shiro, the speakers are ready! Karaoke night is GO!
Shiro: Thanks Pidge. Alright Paladins, who wants to go first?
Lance: ***Raises his hand in the air and waves it back and forth energetically*** Ooh, me! Me me me me me ME! You’ve gotta choose me! I have the perfect song I wanna sing for this!
Alright Lance. You can go first.
Lance: ***Gets up from the couch, makes a yes! motion with his arm, then proceeds to the “stage”*** Yes! Okay, so the first song I’d like to sing for you tonight is an oldie but goody, which is my interpretation of how I feel.
Hunk: ***Muttering softly*** Oh boy, this should be good.
Lance: ***Motioning to Pidge, who is initially perplexed by the song title*** Hit it, Pidge!
Pidge: ***Rolls their eyes, yet smiles one of their quirky mischievous smiles***
The music starts to play
Lance: ***Singing and performing dramatically*** Yo listen up, here is the story, about a little guy that lives in the blue world…“
Keith: ***Blinks twice, frowning. Can’t quite recognize the song yet.***
Hunk: ***Groans*** Of course you chose this song.
Shiro: ***Tilts head to one side, curious to hear the song.***
Pidge: ***Grinning as the chorus arrives*** Wait for it…
Lance: I’M BLUE, DA BA DEE, DA BA DIE, DA BA DEE DA BA DIE…
Hunk and Keith: Groaning together, especially Keith, now that he recognizes the song.
Keith: Really, Lance? Really?! That’s the song you’re going to sing!?! Couldn’t you have chosen a different song other than that!?
Lance: ***Stops singing, glares at his rival, then slowly smirks fiendishly as an idea comes to mind.*** Why, are you insinuating that you don’t like my singing, Keith? Is it too painful for you to listen to? I thought that this was supposed to be a team-building exercise!
Keith: Team-building has nothing to do with it! Your choice of song is horrible.
Lance: It is not!
Keith: It is too! And I’m not implying anything about your singing that hasn’t already been said.
Shiro: ***Interrupting the argument with a Space-Dad-does-NOT-Approve glare.*** Alright, that’s enough! Keith, Lance is right; this is supposed to be a team-building exercise, where we build each other up. And not deliberately annoy our other teammates, okay Lance?
Keith: ***Grumbling softly, frowning to himself, then letting up.*** Fine.
Lance: Alright, alright. Fine. I’ll turn it down a notch, okay? How about if I sing Taylor Swift instead? She’s cool; she’s popular! Is that someone everyone can agree with?
Hunk shrugs, Keith rolls his eyes, and Pidge nods her approval with a thumbs-up. Shiro makes sure that the others agree, then gives Lance his permission. Taylor Swift seems harmless enough.
Lance: Great! Okay, so here’s what I’d like you to play next, Pidge…
Pidge: ***Listens to Lance’s whispers, tries to control their reaction and not laugh at Lance’s song of choice.
Lance: ***Smirking fiendishly*** This one’s for you, Keith!
The music starts to play, and starts innocently enough…until Lance reaches the chorus.
Lance: BUT LOVING HIM WAS RED, RE-E-E-ED, RE-E-E-ED…
End scene, Pandemonium ensues.
A.N.–Yeah, that’s pretty much it. I couldn’t resist the puns, and I couldn’t help but think that it’s something Lance would totally do.