this-is-so-heartbreaking-and-beautiful

phillip hamilton things, for people who haven't or can't see the show.

-during his rap in take a break, he starts out nervous and then kid gets WAY IN TO IT, bending his knees and flexing his arms and yelling. alex hugs him and looks so proud and phillip is so pleased with himself. it’s precious.

-during reynolds pamphlet, jefferson, madison, and burr take him up front, surround him, and show him the paper. they point and say “at his own house? at his own house? damn.” out loud to him and oh my god his face, he’s shattered. you can physically see his father get taken down a peg in his eyes. I can’t even describe it. it was heartbreaking.

- I always pictured his argument with george eaker happening up close, like he pushed past a bunch of people and was up his face. but no, eaker is up on the balcony and in true hamilton fashion, phillip is making a scene and shouting at him from below. the actors in the “play” even stop to watch, and you’re like damn this really is alex’s son.

-when he’s telling his dad about the duel, alex is standing with his arms folded (and using his “dad” voice) and phillip looks so sheepish but also defiant and it reminds me so much of “meet me inside.”

-“stay alive reprise.” tore. my. heart. out. which I knew it would but jesus. no mercy. I was full on sobbing. (eliza screams at the end of it and I can’t even describe that. it’s so horrible and your breath catches in your throat and she sounds so worn down and destroyed. she’s held it together throughout all the shit alex put her through but in that moment it all comes crashing down and you can hear so much pain. It’s heartbreaking and beautiful. the acting is amazing.)

9

Films in 2012: Five Centimeters Per Second

“It must really be a lonelier journey than anyone could imagine. Cutting through absolute darkness, encountering nothing but the occasional hydrogen atom. Flying blindly into the abyss, believing therein lie the answers to the mysteries of the universe.”

Mama, don’t cry.
I was once your little baby boy,
so full of love and light. 
By the time I turned 25, 
I was lost among the pavement,
lower than the basement,
and I couldn’t stand to smile,
I thought of taking my own life.
But Mama, don’t cry.
I found songs among the tragic,
hung my hat on sadness.
Mom, I think they’re trying to keep the grand romantic in me,
now that we got bottom lines.
But mom, I think I’m ready to free the grand romantic in me.
day 1: i cried so hard my mom woke up every hour to make sure i was still breathing; she told me it was like i was a newborn in his crib for the very first time.
day 2: i went to school and cried in the counselors office.
day 3: i believed we were okay and our love was cured, i think my mind was playing a sick joke on me.
day 4: i told you i’d wait for you, you replied with “i don’t want you to wait”
day 5: i came across a picture of you on tumblr. It lit my throat on fire so i tried lighting your letters over the fire… it was to hard.
day 6: happy one month: you loved me so much you couldn’t even make it a month with me
sincerely - the love you don’t deserve.
day 7: you left me broken into pieces on the bathroom floor, someone is picking up your dirty work, something you’ve never been able to do even before.
day 8: your voice still echoes in the wind and although your touch never got the chance to bruise my skin, your voice overpowered my soul. i’m no longer bleeding on the bathroom floor though i am in the room where you once called me yours.
day 9: im finally laughing with someone new and my smile is bigger and brighter than ever.
day 10: the doubt makes my spine feel less like a vertebrae and more like a giant icicle (you never loved me)
day 11: Since when was heartbreak so fucking beautiful to you? Since when was lying fun? Since when was i not enough for you?
There is nothing pretty about losing feelings in my knuckles after squeezing my hands so tight to keep from texting you
day 12: i was never able to squeeze them tight enough; i never would have imagined that it would be so easy for you to let go.
day 13: i no longer think about you constantly, my heart no longer beats for you, my mom no longer checks to see if i’m alive. I’m moving on like i said i would
day 14: i smoked weed with a girl in the front seat of her car and she asked questions i couldn’t get myself to even answer
day 15: i found out you had finally replaced me and it flicked at my bruises i gave myself but somehow i still didn’t break.
day 16: i still find excuses to text you; you still find reasons to ignore them.
day 17: what color are your eyes? what does your smile look like? what does your voice sound like? who are you now?
day 18: i was worth it. i was so fucking worse it. You don’t deserve the love i had to offer. Fuck you i was worth it
day 19: sometimes all i feel in my chest is my heart trying to escape from its cage it’s being held in; i think it’s tired of all the tears i’ve shed because of you
day 20: i was finally able to sleep right; your voice no longer keeps me awake late at night. You no longer overpower my brain.
day 21: someone told me it took 21 days to break a habit. It has been 21 days since you decided to leave me for her. Within them 21 days, i’ve realized you never deserved me, i was worth it and that life is so much better without you. i’ve realized i don’t need you to be alive.
—  21 days without you
tyrelliot is not dead: hopes and theories

this episode hurts, but I think I understand sam… why he did it…
tyrell is mentally ill not less than elliot, he lives in the delusions with his god complex, he perceives reality in a distorted way, even his love for elliot is not the healthiest (i’m not a hater, i adore tyrelliot, just let me explain) mixed with his gods obsessions and everything he said about fate, predestination, meant to be etc. moreover, he has control issues and can’t always cope with his emotions & anger
the good news: he most likely just flared out and said those things like “elliot’s dead to me” in a temper
the bad news: we may have underestimated the complex of gods and fate in tyrell. his obsessions have gone too far, this is very serious… some people see their dead dads, others see fate and gods… so tyrell was disappointed in his own delusions about elliot/mr robot and their “great destiny”. in a few episodes he went from “i will always be loyal to elliot” to “elliot’s dead to me” and it’s obviously not only about usual romantic love but also about his mental disease. tyrell had an image of a perfect partnership in his head, a picture of fateful gods changing the whole world, running and ruining it, this was his crazy idea, obsession. he is obsessed as well as elliot (elliot’s obsession has taken a shape of mr robot).
i’m not trying to say that tyrell’s love for elliot is just his disease. i believe they do have a special bond but we should admit that his real, beautiful feelings are mixed with his manic obsessive ideas, images, and conceptions of gods. it’s no wonder he throws harsh words after becoming disappointed in his own delusion 
i hope someday tyrell and elliot will get treatment and help each other (btw i don’t think they shouldn’t be together before treatment, they can). the situation is bad but not hopeless. they both are mentally ill but we always have a hope. maybe tyrell is really the one who makes mr robot switch to elliot, maybe he saves elliot from mr robot, he causes elliot’s appearance? and maybe elliot doesn’t pull back when tyrell touches him during the entire show, although he doesn’t like when someone violates his personal space, for a reason? these two things already give me some hope. there has to be a sense in that. so don’t lose hope guys. our otp is complicated and heartbreaking but so beautiful 

That scene was so heartbreaking and beautiful, because of course she wasn’t mad at him for what he did– she was just upset that he thought she wouldn’t. 

She thought they were past him hating himself and that he could talk to her but he still kept this from her because he’s so scared of losing his family, and Emma Swan, who’s been on her own all her life, wants him to lean on her when he’s hurting, wants him to share things with her and wants them to do things together. 

She knows that his past is going to haunt him, but she wants him to share it with her so that he can live with it, so that they can live. 

I’m ruined. They love each other so much and they’re both such broken characters who struggle with love and I will never be okay again.

Johnny Depp visiting children in a hospital in tahiti on his own birthday is so heartbreaking beautiful. He loves making these children laugh and it means a lot to him. Even on his own birthday he can’t stop making these people happy. I’m crying it’s so wonderful. It’s a passion for him doing this, he loves wearing his Captain Jack Sparrow costume and walking around a hospital. He cares so much because he was at the same situation as many of the parents once. And it makes me cry so much he only want them to be happy.

5

Stockholm is drowning in flowers

Today, April 9th 2017, two days after the recent horrific terror attack on Friday, the people of Stockholm came together in a huge love manifestation to show that terror will never win. Stockholm stands.

Seeing all the people come together after such a horrific attack is so beautiful, heartbreaking and heartwarming.

Stockholm, I love you. Love always wins.

You manifested yourself
In my dreams again
The way you have for weeks

Each night is new
But nonetheless familiar

I am somehow simultaneously
Aware, consciously, of our reality
And immersed, subconsciously, in desire

This consciousness serves not
As a gentle reminder of my delusion
But instead 
As a blunt force to my cerebral cortex

So violent, in fact, 
That upon waking, 
My head aches,
Stomach turns,
And skin scorches

The deepest parts of my mind
Are fused to you;
Begging to relive 
Our most intimate
And passionate moments

To smell the sweetness
And feel the softness
Of your skin
Surrounding me,
If only once more

And so I dream
Of you welcoming me,
Perfectly content with my company;
Connecting and moving rhythmically,
As immaculately as ever

Eliciting an emotional response
That is so profoundly heartbreaking
And nostalgic
And beautiful;
One which I embrace
And rely upon

—  The Comfort of Cognitive Dissonance

anonymous asked:

Do you have any favorite fics? :) (except your own haha)

Bughead fics? :)

WELL! I am currently in the middle of reading Pieces of My Heart by @lazydaizies and I’M SO IN LOOOOVE. I’m one of those people who usually has to read a fic once it’s completely finished so I am enjoying this one so much right now. It’s a masterpiece! 

Now, I love dark/supernatural fics. So here are a few of my favorites in that category: 

My Body’s Broken, Yours Is Bent  by @jugandbettsdetectiveagency (THIS ONE IS PROBABLY MY ALL TIME FAVORITE BUGHEAD FIC IF WE’RE BEING SO HONEST? LIKE IT’S A JUST ONE SHOT BUT I RECOMMEND THE HELL OUT OF IT.) Also The Serpent and The Swan! I’m a little behind on reading the chapters (because I suck) but I’m going to catch up on it this weekend and I’M SO EXCITED.

Werewolves of Riverdale by @bughead-fic-request is absolute GENIUS. This fic is everything I love, supernatural beings and action? COUNT ME IN. It’s just a one shot as well, but it’s so freaking great. I highly recommend it. 

LITERALLY EVERYTHING BY @cooperjones2020! MY DARK!JUGGIE QUEEN. I need to catch up on all of her fics this weekend too, because I neeeeeed my fix.

and because i love angst so much: 

ain’t no sunshine (when she’s gone) by @lusterrdust is so heartbreaking and beautiful. i adore it.

There’s evil in your heart (it wants out to play) by @juggydunes is a freaking GEM! If you love crime shows and stuff like this, THIS IS THE FIC FOR YOU! 

And any and everything by my two absolute favs, @itstenafterfour and @bettydooper. They write the best one shots! 

I’m kind of bad at keeping up with the reading because I usually get so caught up in my own writing, but since I’m taking a small break from writing so continuously, I’m excited to read up on all the fics! Hopefully my list will grow but for now, these are my favs. :)