this-is-just-perfect-ok

Swimming in a portable hole

backstory: so our group has helped out a cult get a special weapon that was stolen from them, after getting the weapon they begin to use it to open a portal to the wyrd ( a special dimension created by a litch to embody all of his creations that would never die) the portal opens under a lake and water starts spilling out into the room quickly, the BB slows time to enjoy our final deaths. Me, a Goliath Barbarian, Anton a Human Sorcerer and Viosa a Dragonborn Cleric try to figure out what to do.

DM (as BB): You know I like to savour these little moments, they always… (BB puts his hand to his ear) wait what? ok wait right there. (to us) well this was fun, I’m Sad I don’t get to see you die…Bye!

Anton (ooc): wait my carpet is like an infinite portable hole right?

Dm: ya

Anton (ooc): I open the carpet and tell everyone to get under it so we are not crushed by the pressure 

Dm: you all cram under this 10 foot carpet and you wait to be bowled over by the water, and just like a waterfall, water quickly fills the room.

Me: wait Anton I can’t swim!

Anton: why didn’t you bring this up earlier

Me: we never had to go swimming so I thought it was never really important

Dm: Wow that is just perfect ok make a Wisdom save

Me (ooc): *rolls an 8* 9

Dm: you start to drown as the thought of having to even be this close to water has you start panicking

Me: (screaming) Anton you’re a sorcerer why don’t you have anything to get this out of here

the party is crying with laughter since this is something they have never seen, this tough massive goliath shreeking in terror as water starts to fill up

Anton (ooc): I cast levitate on the Barbarian

Dm: ok (to me) you start to float up into this lake faster than everyone else

Me: No Anton don’t leave me! (starts to try to swim down)

Viosa (ooc): *face palms* Can I cast sleep on him?

Dm: (surprised) sure uh..make an attack role

Viosa: *rolls a natural 20*

Dm: ok (to me) just as you think you are about to die your whole world goes dark, (to everyone) the water in the lake slowly starts to drain out I want you all to make strength saves except the barbarian cause he is asleep.

*all of the group fails*

Dm: Wow…you are all sucked into the hole and fall for a while before you realize you are not actually falling, but rather floating in space.

Me: *wakes up* (still screaming) where are we!? did we die?

Anton (ooc): can we swim? like move around?

Dm: sure ya you realize you can move a little

Anton: ok everyone I think I see the hole

Me: Again…I can’t swim!

(everyone again loses their shit and the sorcerer spends a good 20 min teaching me how to swim, we make it out of the hole to find we are in a lake bed with all of the water drained)

a bunch of headcanons that literally no one asked for, ever, but here they are anyway
  • lance actually did pretty bad in spanish in school, but knows it fluently still
    • hunk enjoys to bully lance a bit on this bc he got a higher grade even though he knows like ten (10) verbs
    • lance is Suffering™
  • pidge knows a lot of german? no one knew why until they kinda realized that the name holt is actually from german descent and her grandparents spoke german.
  • lance can dance waltz shockingly well?? he’s awful at everything else, but waltz??? damn.
  • keith is the worst dancer there is. does he even understand rythm? no.
  • everyone in team voltron are amazing singers.
    • shiro’s voice is so deep but also so light that just makes you want to listen to him forever, even though he can be pretty self conscious of his singing at first. (just give him some glasses of nunvil and he will be singing wake me up before you go-go all night)
    • lance is so good, but his voice changes a tiny bit when he sings in spanish and its so good. it’s like water, flowing perfectly in an invisible rythm. he’s just. yes.
    • hunk. oh my god, hunk. it’s like honey and tea on a cold autumn night, deep and golden. he loves acapella, especially doing the deepest and most difficult tones there is. lance and hunk used to sing duets together, often musicals, during the garrison. they still do.
    • keith used to sing a lot when he was alone in the shack to get through cold nights and task-less days, so he is good?? like just give him a guitar and you will literally fall asleep to his smooth voice. he can easily do a lot more angry music, but a soft lullaby with his voice is the best way to get you to slumber.
    • pidge. oh my god. alright, so pidge doesn’t enjoy singing that much but she is the best rapper there is. like, daveed diggs level of rapping. her freestyling is to live for. sometimes while the team has formed voltron, you can hear, distantly, a faint voice, rapping away at the speed of light, about literally anything that’s going on. it’s insane.
      • “pidge, how are you doing that” “what” “the rapping??” “uh, words just fly out of my mouth” “what the fuck”
    • ok ok so. allura. we all know she has a good voice. but listen, listen. all alteans’ singing sound like how we imagine sirens. well, not the loud ear piercing one, but the dream-like, soothing one. allura’s voice is golden, silky, smooth. just everything you love into a voice. that’s allura. just. perfection. 
    • ok coran can sing but. no one knows this. what is that angel-like singing coming from the showers??? who is it ? ? we don’t know. 
      • everyone tries to find out. they never find out. 
  • coran has somehow managed to accidentally walked in on everyone in team voltron just as they got out of the shower at least once. 
  • shiro once got hit on by an alien and the voltron team just ended up backing up the alien, thus making shiro completely flustered and overwhelmed with compliments.
  • shoutout to that time allura was too tired to ask someone to grab the bowl of food for her so she just grew out her arm to like six feet and got it herself and freaked everyone out.
    • “what? this is normal.” “NO IT IS NOT WHAT THE FUKC
  • shiro is actually not a morning person. he wakes up at like 4 am so the other guys wont see his awful morning ritual which is basically just drowning five buckets of coffee and a lot of internal screaming.
guide 2 pentagon

hui: the one with the eye smile, dad(dy), knows how talented he is

jinho: The Small One, grandpa that lets his grandsons get away with anything, soothing voice

hongseok: the muscley one, pretty eyes, a dudebro with healthy access 2 his feelings

e’dawn: the screaming one, raps like he’s possessed but in a good way, weird af

shinwon: the one with the shoulders, a cheese, always taking his clothes off

yeo one: the one eye fucking the camera every live show, great hair, cries a lot

yanan: the one with the legs, literally 2 pure for this earth needs 2 be protected, if u ever hear ‘annyeong chingudeul’ it’s him

yuto: the one with the cheekbones, momma’s boy, scaredy cat but will actually stab u if u try him

kino: the one that smiles with his whole body, dancing machine, everyone’s best friend

wooseok: The Tall One, like he’s seriously so big, loves his pentabros and fans so much and is really just perfect ok

anonymous asked:

You used a cuss word in another one of your posts you hypocrite It's not even very far back??

LOOK I admit to not being perfect I’m just trying OK!!!

anonymous asked:

Can we appreciate how you draw cheekbones like - I'm honestly - they're just perfect ok- like most of your art but still those cheekbONES LOONY

I´m soRRY BUT cheekbones are the preccioust thing men have in their face exept for their eyes!! anyway tHANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!! ♥♥♥

We Are Bulletproof Pt. 2

because i have nothing better to do on christmas eve..

wut

when you’re washing the dishes and you touch a piece of food

when you’re washing the dishes and you touch a REALLY ICKY piece of food

>____< too cute

i’m not surpised anymore

cute teeth

dat maknae sass

SUPREME GRIN :D

world peace advocate

the TaeTummy

i love jhope, he’s so passionate

dancing physically pains seokjin

rapmon: out of the way, bitch

jimin: omg hyung

HAHA

“oppa~”

jung hoseok ft. TaeTummy

cutie

“ahhh i fell on my knee!”

can someone name this kink omf–

T_T

anonymous asked:

*looks at the Sammy rp drama* Geez Bendy. You really did it this time. He loved you with all his heart, he would even protect you if needed, AND he even went through the trouble of doing his very best to take care of you. Nobody's perfect ok? Just thought I'd say something.

“my sammy was a complete ass,the other sammy I feel kinda bad for what I did..I know not everyone is perfect..he just takes it way to far sometimes…”