I saw a very kind persons comment on the old pic recently on DA and it resparked me to wanna draw her again! That and I found a brand new copy of ACNL hidden in my storage while I was moving and damn wasn’t that a cool find!
Back in the early days of DBC, 50% of my motivation came from sheer spite. I wasn’t particularly fond of a few of the top BillDip fics at the time and I just could not stand the thought of them being more popular than my fic. It’s not a very nice motivation but by god did it get me writing.
hcs of grimmjow trying really hard to be romantic (and probs failling lmao) after screwing up? like, he forgot an important date, insulted s/o without noticing, etc.
Grimmjow and romantic do not belong in the same paragraph; unless there is a not in there somewhere lmao. I feel I need to justify? is that the word I want?? why these are going to be the way they are so the first few bullets are more about how I personally feel he would be in a relationship, if you could call it that. I feel like I need to explain my absence but like… I have so I won’t bore you with the same-but-different explanation here.
Grimmjow is shitty boyfriend–maybe a tad NSFW
It’s worth noting I don’t think Grimm would ever really put a label on a relationship. He likes to think he isn’t tied down and the more you push for a label the more he pulls away. You just kinda have to figure out where you stand by yourself–which is, undoubtedly, frustrating.
A relationship to you is different to him. He more or less expects you to know you can’t be with anyone else and will frequently call you his. But never his girlfriend. It’s always more a ‘back off she’s mine.’He only really acknowledges his attachment to you as possessive behaviour. But he expects his partner to do most of the work in a relationship.
He won’t talk about ‘problems’ and he doesn’t buy you flowers. He teases you and grabs you; or tells you that you’re his and no one else’s. So if you are expecting a romantic boyfriend who takes you on dates under the stars or sakura trees, you’re in for a lot of disappointment. He isn’t romantic, not one romantic bone in his body. Romance is a human thing and he just doesn’t understand it.
That said he can become deeply attached to someone and he will (internally) recognise that he doesn’t want to be without them. He won’t ever admit though. So he does feel genuinely guilty when he greatly upsets them because ‘oh shit she might leave me.’ He honestly thinks they could do better than him and that can scare him sometimes; so he will try to make it up. But it isn’t really romantic in the conventional sense. And he gets like really awkward.
Okay so we are going with he insulted his S/O because he isn’t a date kinda guy–especially not a planned date kinda guy. On a positive note, all ‘dates’ are spontaneous so he doesn’t stand you up.
He probably called you an idiot or fat or insulted something he knew–he fucking knew–you were insecure about. He wanted the upper hand in a argument and he went for it; now you’re angry and crying all at once and can only utter the broken word ‘leave’
That’s when he knew he fucked up
But he couldn’t stay, there’s no way you would let him after what he just said. For a moment he hated himself. Hated himself so much for his lack of self control and narcissistic nature. He’ll try to justify his actions for hours–and fail. Until he finally realises, walking in the rain along some dingy back alley of town, that he was wrong. And he might lose you.
So he calls, he texts. He tries to get a hold of you. You’re ignoring him or sleeping. He can’t be sure but he doesn’t have a key and doesn’t really want to break in because that would make it worse so he goes to Ichigo’s. The only person he thinks might be able to help him.
Ichigo is shocked obvs, but he tries to help. Grimm leaves in the morning hell bent on making things right.
He buys flowers. Nice flowers. And you’re favourite snack. He considers buying you a puppy–he disregards the thought. He doesn’t like dogs. And he has his speech all planned out in his head. He’s going to sweep you off your feet.
Except he doesn’t. He returns home, clothes wrinkled with his flowers and snacks and knocks, determinedly, on the door.
You answer, hair a mess, a giant over sized T-shirt on. Your eyes had been red and puffy from crying; and you are looking directly at him.
He chokes and forgets what he was going to say. He starts stuttering and mumbling. He can’t put his words together so he just shoves the offending flowers and food at you. You think you heard an ‘I’m sorry’ and ‘stupid flowers’ but you can’t be sure.
When you’re thoughts are finally collected you let him in to talk about it. Still shell-shocked over the flowers and attempted romanticism.
Besides Naruto, to me fandoms were mostly heaven. Granted, the old ones. I met so many people, people with whom I forged so many beautiful friendships that just lasted over time.
I have the most beautiful memories from those times, and some of the most beautiful people as friends, and I just couldn’t feel happier about that. it was also what shaped me into what I am today. And funny how life has its road…
CARCINOGEN. figure skating is a disappointment this year. i expected competition and surprises with pyeongchang 2018 around the corner, but it’s the same winners. anyways, so a couple things happening blog-wise : i’m writing a meta post ( among other small ones i have lined up ) in regards to pamela’s sexuality since it’s never outright stated, only exhibited through relationships and left open-ended for the reader to decide. i think you’ll be fairly surprised with what i’ve selected her ‘label’ as. secondly, once i’ve finished this starter call( about five more left to write ), i will post another starter call that is selective and caters to writers willing to do longer, plot-based threads, and are comfortable with lots of out-of-character communication and planning. i want to to develop pamela and explore who she is beyond the comics ; to test her alignment : is she an anti-hero or a villain? what good things is she capable of, and when does her darker side surface? the balance between the poison ivy pseudonym and her ‘day’ role as dr. isley. if you’re willing to do the aforementioned, then hang on! that starter call will be coming! ( i will probably go mains / exclusive with majority of those who do this. you’ll get a cute lil’ icon next to my sidebar linking to your blog :’) 12/10 not a bad deal ).
finally… full offence, i am still a dc comics baby. i’ve only read comics with poison ivy, harley quinn, and catwoman ( and maybe 1 thing about teen titans ), so i’m taking suggestions! use this opportunity to tell me what comics i should read! it can be ones with your muse, your favourite one, or just an issue you think a dc baby should read to understand the world better. :’)
“But honestly, I’m not comfortable hanging out one-on-one anymore. Thanks for everything.“
Those were my last words to him. It had always been a shaky relationship. We started out as friends and then, best friends. It was amazing how well we got along and it was unbelievably fun to spend time together with him. But, to me, it had always been that of a friendship. I wasn’t attracted to him in any romantic way.
That was not the case for him. He ended up telling me how he felt and confirmed my suspicions. I politely rejected him, telling him the truth of how I simply didn’t feel the same way. He wasn’t deterred, though, and told me he would openly pursue me in hopes of convincing me. I honestly didn’t mind and told him he was free to try.
Despite his decision to continue to pursue me, it still hurt him. We’d had a routine of calling each other at night and, after his confession, our nightly phone calls took a bitter route. He’d cry and repeatedly ask me why I didn’t feel the same way, why was he different from the boys I’d liked in the past, what could he do to make me feel the same? It was hard on me and I know now that I should’ve been tougher, I should’ve steeled myself against his pleas.
But it was hard. Before he’d become someone who wanted to be my boyfriend, he’d been my best friend. He still had been even after he confessed and I’d rejected him. And I so badly wanted him to be happy because he was my best friend.
After a bit, I ended up falling for him a little. I emphasize a little. During one of our phone calls, I ended up telling him that I liked him too. Wrong move. He didn’t believe me at first, but as I continued to insist I did (with a growing feeling of hesitation), he became ecstatic that I finally felt the same way he did.
Except I didn’t. Or at least, not even close to how deep his feelings were for me. My feelings for him barely scrapped the surface, but his were nailed ten feet into the ground. As our friendship became a relationship, it slowly became more and more apparent to me what I’d done. The feeling of discomfort when I held his hand or openly showed our relationship only gave me a growing feeling of dread. Our never-ending fighting didn’t help either.
We dated for a week and, all throughout it, I couldn’t help but feel like something was wrong. That this was not what I wanted and that I did not feel the same way. I knew it would seem like I’d lead him on, but I had to end our so-called relationship. I told him as soon as was possible and, of course, he was crushed. I felt disgusted with myself, that I couldn’t have tried to figure out my feelings clearly to prevent this exact situation. That I had to break his heart…again.
It was hard for both of us afterwards, but not for the same reasons. He was heartbroken. I’d lost my best friend. He asked for distance to get over me. I agreed. Every time I think back on what happened, I regret it. I regret everything. I know I should be living in the present, but I constantly revert back to the past when I think about him. I didn’t like him as much as he did for me, I didn’t love him, but he had been my best friend, and it hurt me to hurt my best friend.
A year ago, he asked to meet up for coffee. I agreed. We talked about the past and where we’d gone wrong. He asked to be friends again. But I couldn’t do it, not because of him, but because I knew I wasn’t confident I wouldn’t be able to prevent hurting him again. He wanted to be friends again, but my memories of him were full of confusion, fighting, and sadness. I knew I couldn’t act the same way around him anymore, I couldn’t trust myself with that responsibility. So I disappointed him again.
To this day, I want him to be happy. So happy that I’ll become a simple thing of the past to him and not the best friend he’d shared long walks with or witty sarcastic jokes with. I hope he finds a girl who will love him back and give him everything he ever wanted. I hope he will find someone who could give him what I could not and still cannot.
Although I didn’t entirely feel the same way, you were one of the most important people in my life once. And I will never forget that, or you.
rtmi I have three beautiful wonderful datemates and we all love each other so much. Thats all, nothing actually tmi just. I love them. So damn much. I got to meet one of them in person recently and I miss being in person with them so fuckn much I wanna move down to be around them. I can't wait to meet the others too- here's hoping we can all meet up someday soon. Anyhow! I hope you have a great night!
this is a good and pure ask, i wish you all the best
I really relate to my Ryder because I too am a big gay fuck up who can’t flirt or do anything without tripping on my own shoelaces 14 times, and generally have no idea what the fuck is going on but damn do I try my best.
So I’m going to talk to a therapist tomorrow about ESA/service dog aspects (the service dog one being “can I even qualify for this”), because I’ve wanted a dog for a LONG time and I’ve gotten to a point in my depression where I think it would benefit me.
Now a family friend of ours got a blue heeler (Australian cattle dog)/border collie mix pup, and she is the SWEETEST little thing; she’s very well behaved, trains well, very gentle, great temperment, and is great around others (she also gives the best hugs). Our friend told me she thinks this is the perfect dog type for me, and is keeping in contact with the breeder (which is SUPER sweet of her, especially as I never asked her too. She’s just thinking of me, I love her tbh).
In my experience with blue heeler crosses (I don’t think I’ve ever met a full breed one before), they’ve been SUPER gentle; as was the old (presumed) border collie mix we had. What I’m wanting to know is this: is this a norm with this breed mix, or have the dogs I’ve met been flukes? And do you think they’d make for good ESA, or even psychiatric service dogs?
Obviously it depends on a lot of things, like good breeding, and just the individual dog in and of itself; but I’d like to know if this is common, or if I’ll be looking for a needle in a haystack, so to speak. Because Jin is a great little dog, and we all agree a dog like her would be perfect for me; and if I can train one to better help me, all the better.
I’d also like to hear about your experiences with ESA/service dog stuff! Especially if you live in Canada as that’s where I live (doubly so if you live in BC). I’m looking for any advice really; I’ve been doing research on good breeds for this sort of stuff, but I highly value personal experiences and I respect the opinions of many of you.
Best schools for what your kid wants would be MIT, Carnegie Mellon, Stanford. These are high tier schools so keep him with the AP Maths and definitely AP sciences - make sure they're always a step up in difficulty. Try summer programs like MITES, Carnegie has one too. Make sure they have extracurriculars. The more diversity the better. These aren't the only routes to go but they're the best at what you kid wants to do.
Those all sound like seriously expensive. T_T Do they offer scholarships for kids with special needs? I assume that’s his best bet aside from his grades. Seriously, any info is appreciated. I never got beyond a GED so this is all new to me and I feel like a shit parent for not knowing how to put my kid on the right path since mine fell too short. I’ll keep tagging these as #unrelated for those that want to ignore these. Sending responses to my personal blog would be best too. -Abby
i was at a straight bar last night with some friends and this guy overheard us talking and kinda joined the conversation so i talked with him for a while and we got some shots together and eventually he was like “yeah donald trump is my favorite” and i was just like hmmmm and then he showed me a pic of his cousin who apparently died in sandy hook and was like “nothing could have stopped this from happening” and then he started getting really aggressive when i said i disagreed and he said i was accusing him of lying and then he called me an idiot but the best moment was when he was like “you know at first i thought you were gay but you were cool to talk to anyway, now you’re not” and i went from annoyed to pissed and was like “i actually am super gay but you’re fucking pathetic who do you think you are” and started yelling at this guy at the bar and then i blacked out. how were your tuesday nights
ok so there is A LOT you can do for this event, so i thought i’d just sum up a few of the plot ideas i have here and make them public! i’m open to writing about any of these (and i’ll take more than two threads to make sure everyone gets points!) and of course you can steal these ideas and do them yourself or with another member too! i promise i won’t mind!
(putting this under a cut because i accidentally got carried away. rip)
For a good part of 2015, I opted to teach part-time at
Enderun Colleges, McKinley Hill. I’ve actually never heard of the school
until they texted me, offering me a spot. My best guess is that they got my
number via my JobStreet account. At first I regarded their text messages as
spam. I ignored about a couple of messages from them before Googling the school. The
search showed me that they were a real school with a picturesque campus. I
needed to make use of my spare time at grad school as I was, really, just
preparing for the foreign language exam before, which is a prerequisite for
thesis. I figured it wouldn’t hurt to check them out. They were offering me to
teach English and the idea was more than enticing. So I replied and scheduled a
demo with them.
It was a pretty intimidating setup. Enderun was more posh
than any school I’ve actually spent more than an hour in. Marble floors,
carpeted stairs, chandeliers, even the bathrooms had sconces. Frikin’ sconces.
It was all just like in the pictures online, except a tad bit smaller. Everyone
was dressed to nines while I didn’t even have a coat on. And woe to my choice
of Uniqlo navy blue jeans. I knew that at times like this I could always remind
myself that I’ve been educated in the top state university and that everything
fancy here could mean completely nothing. Of course, this is a defense
mechanism, you know. After all, a school is only as good as its students, not
its interiors or architecture. Nevertheless, Enderun enchanted me. It’s funny
remembering it now. I knew though, right from the start, that I wasn’t cut out
for that kind of environment. I’ve fully embraced being one with the masses and
not because it’s the noble thing to do. It’s because I really am one of them.
I’ve lived a fairly comfortable life and I have my family to thank for that.
But cut from them, I don’t have much, not even a car. I do have a college
degree so that’s one of my aces. Anyway, my point is, I know how difficult life
is and seeing so many privileged youngsters makes me literally scoff. I am
judging them harshly and hastily, but I found such frivolities ridiculous. To
drive my point home: just beyond the walls of the beautiful, state-of-the-art
school is a network of houses, all belonging to informal settlers. You can
check Google Maps to verify this. Something about the beauty and the promise of
prestige comes off as pretentious to me.
But I quickly learned how to get past that, you know, because I was in
dire need of a paying gig.
McKinley Hill wasn’t too friendly to me. It was okay, but
from where I stayed here in the city, it’s quite a commute. I didn’t mind the
icky van rides and the long overpasses, it’s just the time I spent traveling
that was impractical for me, but I did last for almost a year, minus the time I
had to take a break and study for my Spanish exam, which I completely passed,
by the way. Thank you very much.
Anyway, this is already turning out to be a longer entry
than I had first intended. Going back—where was I?—teaching. After a series of
interviews and a successful teaching demo, they hired me. I discovered I was to
teach Korean students from various universities there. (Funny; the first thing
that popped into my head was the fact that I love Korean food.) When the kids
came, I was impressed with the number. They were a lot. Basically, they have
this sort of partnerships with these schools there, which send students here
for a rather intensive English camp. The students were amazing, by the way.
Very friendly. Sociable. Well, most of them anyway. And I don’t think I’ll ever
forget the ones that connected with me, especially my little group composed of
Lindsay, Jay, Chloe, and Stella. Spending every day with them bonded us and I
became quite emotional when they left. I think I joined about five of these
camps, but all I really remember was the last batch. The teaching itself, to
me, was peanuts. (The fact that English is also a second language to me, helped.) Really not bragging. I suck at a lot of things, so it’s easy
for me to admit it when I’m good at something. Does that come across as
i’m in my bedroom taking shots of communion wine, peeling off the same skin that you touched and thinking about how you were only holy in small doses.
i remember the time i got high and told myself and everyone else that i am the messiah. i still believe that my body could be divine, but this time around, i realize i’m not pure enough.
but jesus christ, you were dressed in your sunday best, smoking cigarettes in the church parking lot after hours, swearing to me afterwards that you’d quit you’d quit you’d quit. well
angel gabriel came to me in a dream and told me to burn your name off the tip of my tongue with the candle i used to light before each sermon. or maybe it was my lighter from the gas station. i don’t think it really matters anyway.
all i know now is that you will never be holier than thou.
It's testing week at my school, my grades are dropping, and I'm constantly catching myself before I have an anxiety attack. Could I have a star, just to remind myself that everything will be ok?
Testing weeks are always stupidly stressful, even if you think you’ve got a good handle on the material. My best advice is to focus on the tests themselves rather than your grades right now; however, if you’re really worried about them I’d suggest talking to your teachers/professors. A lot of educators are more than happy to help you pass, especially if they see that you’re willing to do some extra credit or something.
Don’t lose hope, you’re doing the best you can. Remember to take breaks, take care of yourself, and get enough sleep. Everything will be okay <3