this was so difficult to get approval for

i hate how cassandra clare is criticized for making alec biphobic at first. 

no person is perfect, and like anyone else alec too had flaws. point is, he overcame his prejudices and learnt from his mistakes. book!alec is a deeply flawed person with good characteristics too, just like anyone else. he is a PERSON, and his sexuality made him insecure. the antis go like “ugh but this was PrObLeMatic!!!” like yes susan it was, it was supposed to be problematic because that is supposed to be a problem. cassandra clare wrote that particular scene in just because she knew that a part of her audience may be looking at magnus through alec’s eyes and slutshame him just because of his sexuality.

alec and magnus’s book relationship had so many barriers, their genders, their SPECIES made it difficult for them to be together, but at the end, they respected each other as equals and were in a loving relationship. the show is removing all of alec’s character growth and turning their relationship into a slowburn au where all their flaws don’t exist. 

the same alec who tried to make magnus mortal out of selfishness respected magnus’s refusal to marry him without getting angry. alec’s parents, who at first did not approve of alec’s boyfriend, gladly accepted a warlock baby into their family. the entire point of the homophobia and biphobia was to show that despite having superpowers, shadowhunters are still humans with prejudices. 

and i’m angry af at the show for removing the bigotry of certain characters in the universe, because they are depriving us of important development of some characters

Fanfiction things

oAll right I have a multi-chapter fic that I’m currently in the process of updating. However; I have another idea for a one-shot fic series and I would like to know if people would be interested in reading it.

When fighting #VillainOfTheWeek Kara somehow gets stuck as a 4 year old. 

I have a few ideas already:


  • Tiny Kara causing mischief at the DEO Base - messing with Winn’s computer, flying around the rooms.
  • Tiny Kara still having superpowers^ but is nowhere near as strong anymore so she actually can get hurt, cue protective Alex
  • Kara being scared of thunderstorms and loud noises
  • Kara being left with Winn because now J’onn has to cover for the city loss of Supergirl. Kara pouting and getting scared whenever Alex or James are out in the field
  • Kara riding shotgun in Maggie’s cop car and playing with the sirens.
  • One person cannot look after this tiny child alone so Kara stays with different people depending on who has the free time.

(In this universe Lena knows and helps at the DEO when needed)

  • Whenever Lena shows up tiny Kara blushes and gets really nervous.
  • Tiny child Kara who has no filter tells Lena that she thinks she’s beautiful. Kara drawing pictures of the two of them together and Lena is the only one who can calm angry child Kara down when she’s upset.
  • Alex giving Kara juice cartons and everyone doting on this sweet innocent child.
  • Reluctant Space Dad sitting with Kara as she colours or when he has to give her piggyback rides with the most deadpan face.

These are just a few of my ideas but any more are welcome. Let me know if this is something people would be interested in reading and any suggestions are gladly appreciated! Will add any suggestions I like in bold!

  • Kara wants to play hide seek with J'onn. To her everything is a game, she starts to run around the DEO always doing something and J'onn is going after her. 
  • Kara has a stuffed animal dog that she NEEDS in order to nap. She names it Krypto -  @bobbywatson <3
  • Kara wants to be just like her big sister. And as children do she copies Alex’s behaviour. (her big sister wears a cool uniform at work and tells people what to do and so does Space dad.)  Cue Winn and his sewing skills. 
  • ^ Next time Alex gets back from a mission she finds little Kara in a tiny DEO uniform complete with badge, standing on a chair(that on closer inspection has a tiny NCPD jacket that looks just like Maggie’s hanging off it) beside J'onn with her hands on her hips waiting to debrief the team.  
  • Obviously they can’t give her any weapons so she has a water gun in her tiny holster, and different little snacks in all the other compartments on the belt. They did give her real handcuffs, which they felt only a bit bad about when she cuffed mon-el to a chair and flew away. (anon I love you for this little addition<3)
  • Cat and Lucy end up having to babysit at one point. 
  • ^ Cat pretends to not know about Kara being Supergirl in order to take care of her, and to everyone’s “surprise” she is a total softie and great with Kara. 
  • Lucy watches Kara at one point, and she lets Kara wear her cool hat and Kara starts saluting everyone and every thing they come across (yes that includes saluting her stuffed dog pup Krypto)
  • Cat finally giving Kara one of her cupcakes because damn it if even she can’t resist a 4 year old Ray Of Sunshine pouting and pleading with her
  • 4 year old Kara reverts back to speaking Kryptonian especially when she’s angry or upset. J’onn who can speak some Kryptonian does not approve when this tiny girl grumbles a “bad word trying to punch another of his brand new monitors.
  • ^ which then gives me Tiny Kara punching punchbags with James.
  • Lena is a smart woman and because of Lex and learning that Kara is from Krypton Lena learns to speak Kryptonian. She speaks it almost fluently. Kara and Lena often have conversations in Kryptonian. - @whiterose-blackrose <3<3
  • Kara is restless and almost always has bundles of energy so getting her to sleep is quite a task. Lena is called whenever Kara is being particularly difficult because for some reason she is the sleep whisperer. (Alex knows it’s because Kara likes to snuggle up to Lena, falling asleep cradled in Lena’s arms -one hand wrapped around her Krypto whilst the other clings to Lena’s clothing)
  • Alex often finds Kara sitting atop of Maggie’s shoulders, Maggie is great with Kara even if she does sneakily give Kara two more scoops of ice-cream when she’s only allowed one.
  • M’gann WHO DID NOT LEAVE gives Tiny Kara stickers, a shit ton of stickers. Kara has a book full of space stickers. When she thinks someone did a really good job she gives them a sticker and everyone tries to act like it’s no big deal but even the toughest DEO agents blush and melt when she beams and presents them with one. You know every agent is working their butt off to earn stickers from their adorable Baby-Agent Kara. J’onn doesn’t even complain, productivity is way up! -anon you are wonderful! <3<3<3
  • ^ (my addition to this) Kara gives her favourite people more than one sticker and proceeds to pepper them with multiple stickers. Winn sniggers as Alex’s DEO badge has at least 10 and Lena’s dress is just covered in brightly coloured star stickers. 
  • Kara gets Alex and Maggie to take her to the park, holding both of their hands as they swing her and then they help her pick out some of the nicest flowers she can find. Lena is in her office when Kara arrives nervously clutching Alex’s hand, the other clutching a large bouquet of flowers. She hands them to Lena with a shy smile and a whispered “Flowers are pretty but not as pretty as you”. Lena answers with a kiss to Kara’s cheek. - @yellowanchor17 <3 (I added a bit to it)
  • Kara’s senses are heightened and she gets attached to being able to comforting scents. Kara likes to give Lucy lots of hugs because “she smells nice” -Lena will deny it but she’s a little bit jealous. That is until she finds out that Kara thinks Lena’s hugs “remind her of home”.  - @sarcasm-with-sarah <3 (I added a little bit but this is perfect!)
  • Kara can be quite protective so when people *coughs* Mon-El *coughs* get a little too close to her favourite people (Alex, Lena, Maggie, Lucy etc) she tends to throw things, things that tiny 4 year old children should not throw. After almost having his hand frozen he soon learns to keep his flirting to a minimum…unless it is involves a certain tech puppy. - @sarcasm-with-sarah (THIS! I love it)
  • ^ This links in to my own idea: Mon-El is actually great with kids, he plays games with Kara and tells her stories about space. He tells her about Royalty on Daxam and what was expected of them. Kara realises he has feelings for Winn and it becomes her match-making mission to pair the two.
Military Wife from H*ll

I work at pretty much one of the only 24/hr diners in my area. Cozy little place with (relatively) cheap food that can remind a person of home with three brand new tvs playing the news (One America, granted, but oh well). Manager is a bit of a hardass and sometimes I wonder if they actually know how to properly run a restaurant but pay is pay. Most of my coworkers are usually friendly (although I have horror stories galore of both them and customers).


But you’re here for the meat of this paticularly Incident. About Military Bitchaloid (as we choose to call her). She comes in once a week, usually on a Friday or Saturday during the overnight and is EXTREMELY picky about her food.

Cooked to long? Sent back.
Plated just askew? Sent back.
Undercooked? Sent back.
I didn’t smile when I set the plate down? Sent back. (May God strike me dead if I’m lying about this one)

Being picky and demanding about food is nothing new though, comes with the job as far as I know. What she does next though….

When it comes time to pay she proudly presents me with a military ID.

Now, two facts come up here:
1. Boss/owner/overlord says Military Discount is only for Active. (Most of us ignore the active part cause how can Overlord ever know, right?)
2. Discount can only be applied to the military person’s meal. Not anyone else’s. It also doesn’t apply to drinks, desserts, or alcohol.


The lady’s ID isn’t for active military, it’s for a military dependent (basically she’s the wife of a military person. Who isn’t even present.). No sweat though, I tell her it only applies to her food.


She flips, says if it doesn’t specify as such in the menu then it’s illegal to claim otherwise that whole shebang. I wanted to tell her that the menu doesn’t even offer a military discount (it does offer a senior discount for 70+). Night manager doesn’t want to deal with her and says to just give her the discount this one time so I do. She also demands the owner’s name and number (I give front desk and day manager’s name. She never calls)

Fast forward next week. Woman comes back, has friends with her. They eat and I bring them the bill (no discount because you have to ask first). She asks for a menu again and when I bring it she has the money in her hand and tells me that she’ll give me the money once I show her where on the menu it specifies the military discount is on the military person’s meal only. Again, I’m struck by the urge to tell her the lack of any information regarding a military discount but I hold my tongue and say it isn’t in the menu. Triumphantly she demands I put it on the whole ticket to which I respond I’ll have to get prior approval and go to my night manager. Manager doesn’t want to deal with her since we are having out weekend after bar rush so we give it to her. Woman again demands owner’s name and number so she can complain about me having ‘an attitude’ and for 'being incredibly difficult’. (Again, she never calls).

Fast forward a week, two days ago (the 25th, sorta) and the woman comes in. Super demanding on her order (biscuits cold and plastic wrapped on the side, gravy in its own container). Military Bitchaloid is only getting that so I don’t say a thing when she presents her 'military ID’ (I feel terrible for her spouse). I put in her order, apply the discount, and move to slip the menu back onto the shelf under the counter when she asks if they fixed that little 'mistake’ on the menu about the military discount not applying to the whole ticket.
Something in me snaps and I just flatly inform her that I am to side with the exact wording of the menu. I give her a second to give me a gloating smile before I inform her that means that we do not offer a military discount. At all.

This woman gets PISSED at me. Actually spat on me, told me I was stupid. I leave her to her seething to get her food (so she’ll leave). We ran out of the Togo bowls so the gravy was put in a Togo cup instead and I take a second to tip it side to side to test if it will spill. I mutter “that worries me” and pull out the tape to tape the lid shut and her hear her say “your shitty personality should worry you more.”

It took everything I had not to scream at this entitled bitch, and the cook who was watching told me it was pretty badass of me to just smile, nod, hand her the food and wish her a nice rest of the night and not acknowledging her spiteful insults or comments at all. Oh, and she refused to talk to the night manager and demanded the owner’s number. Manager said they legally couldn’t give it out (true, and like mentioned before I never gave her the owner’s number, just the front desk). Manager told her she could call the front in the morning and talk to the day Manager. Woman demanded their name, to which my manager declined citing privacy laws.


The bitch never called and I’d bet my paycheck I’ll see her this coming week as well.

I really love the fact that (in Queen of Shadows) both Aelin and Aedion were expecting the other to be disappointed in what they had done to survive the past ten years. Like they both did what was necessary, even if they had to occasionally harm others or themselves to get there, but in each other they found someone who understood that - that morality and what is right is not always easy, that sometimes difficult choices must be made, that it is nearly impossible to go through life pleasing everyone. The approval of others is so fleeting and dependent on things we can’t control or anticipate, and so while they were worried about what the other would think about what they had done (being an assassin, being Adarlan’s Whore), ultimately they could understand and forgive because they had both learned those lessons.

And yeah things change a bit in EoS but I think really that’s what we would all like to have - someone who, when you say, “sorry I am such a jerk and made this choice,” will respond with understanding and love.

Garish Room #28 [2017 ver. member A to Z case of Reita] part 1

- Actor (favorite actor / actress, own acting ability)

Reita: She’s not an actress, but I like Miranda Kerr (laughs). Since she’s the only one who I follow in my instagram, I think it was a crux for fans. And about me, for example, in a video, although there is required acting skills, for me it is completely unthinkable. Many years ago we discussed to stop acting by ourselves. If this is a photoset, then this is self-evident, but if to imagine yourself in a role…I’m quite a bad actor. At the time we created the video [MAD MARBLE HELL VISION], they told me “Get smeared in blood, making something like moans". And I answered: “No, could you take a little pity on me?” (laughs). It’s so embarrassing. But if my partner was an actress, then I would have thought about it (laughs).

- Baby (when you behave like a child)

Reita: When I can’t find things, I’m very angry. I am known for having such a character that I never get upset, but at such situations I can’t be helped. Even searching in the drawer, at first I quickly view everything, but if I can not find, then I throw out all the contents from it. Although I actually lose things easily, I created such a public image, as if I don’t lose them, but it seems that here (in this article) it will be destroyed (laughs). Well, basically, I’m in the places where there are no messy boxes.

- Christmas (memories of christmas)

Reita: This is a story I didn’t tell on the radio. When I was about 6 years old, my parents divorced and for next Christmas I wanted a pretty big rhinoceros “ZOIDS”, so I was looking forward with great anticipation to go to buy it with my mother. But, since it’s been a very short time since the divorce, and besides, my mother was buisy at work, she could not go with me to buy it, because she worked even on Christmas Day. But since I wanted to go buy it together, I said that everything is fine, even if we buy it next day, so, the essence was that I was looking forward to the fact that we’ll go buy it together. But then on the very Christmas Day ZOIDS was delivered to us by the courier. In the usual situation, at that moment, in theory, I should be very happy, but I was too much expecting the fact that we will go together to buy it, and I, calling my mother, who was at the time in the workplace, too vigorously expressed my discontent …This is the memory for which I want to insanely apologize. It was just unforgivable.

- Danger (it was dangerous!)

Reita: Maybe when I had an operation on my throat. I was in such a condition that I was given a blood transfusion, and now I’m already well, but at that time, it seems, it was quite dangerous.

- Emergency (things you think you need to do now, as soon as possible)

Reita: Do sport. For about 2 months my wrists ached, which I damaged by stretching ligaments, so I could not train muscles at all. And then, after an injection, two days later everything began to heal. And from there, I ran into the gym. Trying to be careful in the diet, I didn’t eat anything but white rice, therefore, in order to catch up the time lost so far, already today I want to quickly train. However, since the story of muscle training will not be well received by the public, let’s dwell on this (laughs).

- Fashion (preferences in style)

Reita: I have no special preferences, but it will suffice to say that these are spacious clothes. Almost everyone wears tight-fitting things, but I directly envy their equanimity in this matter. In comparison with the old times, in terms of accessories, I can not wear anything other than the necessary minimum, things that I liked. As for color I hate that I wear only black, gray and white shades, and I would really like to fix it. Actually, I would like that such color, as green, would suit to me, for example (laughs).

- Ghibli (Ghibli’s favorite works)

Reita: “Spirited Away” or “Princess Mononoke” … At the same time, it was also such that I didn’t watch anything except “My Neighbor Totoro”. Since in the first part of “Spirited Away” I eat onigiri, they seem super delicious to me. Probably, I like such ambience.

- Health (what do you pay special attention in the field of health)

Reita: I gave up carbohydrates. However, due to the heavy workload recently, the level of sugar in my blood dropped and there was some really sticky sweat. At that time, of course, I used a little sugar. But basically, I eat vegetables and meat, and tofu … Well, since I pretty much follow what I eat, I’m a little annoying people around.

- Immorality (about treasons, which became a hot topic in 2016)

Reita: Aaaah about this… treason is not good. In this case it is difficult to get approval, isn’t it? (laughs). It seems that people who commit treason absolutely don’t care at all, right? This is constantly shown on TV, isn’t it?  So I started to wonder “what is it?”. And I stopped watching TV, So more than a year, strictly speaking, I don’t have an antenna connected. As for people, I guess, that this is the very thing which feeds the dirty (vulgar) part of human beings. So in reality, they just become shitty creatures (laughs)

- Junk (unnecessary things at home)

Reita: If from the point of view of other people, then it’s probably going to be dumbbells or something like that, isn’t it (laughs). I threw away all the things that I didn’t need, but now in my room there is still a broken speaker for stereo.

- Kimi no Na Wa (the film “Your name”)

Reita: I didn’t watch it, but I was surprised that it sells so well! Even if, for example, good adults will watch it, they will still be interested, won’t they? I think that I would like to watch it one day, but precisely because of the fact that it sells so well, my punk soul lacks the desire to watch it (laughs).

- Love (the importance that love occupies in your life)

Reita: I think that if I wasn’t in the band, the most part would be occupied by THIS (love), isn’t it? But when you’re in a band, the band is more important to you than anything else, so to neglect the group and be completely absorbed in this feeling, this hasn’t happened to me yet. In my life, the presence of love is not so great. Fortunately, I never got upset because of this (laughs).

- Moving (сonditions for moving)

Reita: The hallway should be spacious. Landscape, when I open the front door, should create a feeling, as if I open the door wide to the side. When I return home, would like to feel free in sentimental way. If it’s Tokyo, then it will be quite difficult, right?

- No (work that you would not like to receive by being a member of the Gazette)

Reita: For example, to get into a bath with hot water or something? (laughs) In fact, the work about which I’d have thought that I don’t want to do it, until this moment I just didn’t do anything like that.

translated from japanese to russian by shimizu_ran.vk for the_gazette_quotes.vk

translated from russian to english by me

as always thx for reading and sorry for mistakes ^^

EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS

Hey guys! Unfortunately my family found themselves in a difficult financial situation this november and this is the only way I can support them right now, so I decided to open commissions again!

  • I will draw OCs and fanart (any fandom is ok)
  • I require good references however!! (faceclaims, screenshots, aesthetics, descriptions…etc anything to get the character&tone right)
  • I have the right to decline any commission I feel uncomfortable with

Simple portrait (simple background) - 30€

Detailed portrait (simple background) - 50€

Payment via PayPal invoice in EUR after initial sketch has been approved

If you’re interested commissioning me or have questions don’t hesitate to contact me at wg.commissions@outlook.com!!

More info | Art tag

Thank you for your attention and I hope you have a lovely day!! ^^
Reblogs are greatly appreciated and help a lot ☆

Spin Me Right ‘Round

The Canary was making a quick stop on Outpost CB-10-31, also known as Atlantica, for supplies and some R&R. It was a low-gravity world with a very thin atmosphere. The Outpost itself was built inside a massive dome, inside a crater. This was the first resupply in two years, so the captain had agreed to allow the whole crew shore leave over the course of the two weeks they would be docked there.

Keep reading

notice from the school 学校からのお知らせ (Part 1)

t/n finally the todoroki chapter that many people were requesting from the first light novel, it’s a pretty long part 1 though lol 

Keep reading

[fic] say nice things to me [1/1]

(ao3 link)
rating:
mature

summary:

It’s been over six months now, and there’s no reason for him to turn into a pile of mush whenever Levi compliments him, but he does anyway. He admits to himself that this is a thing that happens to him, and now that he’s acknowledged it, surely it will become less of an issue. 

Turning into a pile of mush is still manageable, but the unmistakable arousal that also washes over him is most inconvenient.

-  -  -

ahahaahsad have i ever told you guys about my massive love for ereri fics with praise kink?? no? srsly i will marry u and have ur babies for ereri praise kink. i’ll sell my own grandma for ereri praise kink, idec.

this is set a while after dental care, but since all that’s here is mostly plotless frickle-frackling, you don’t have to be familiar with what happened previously. this also got way longer than expected and, as usual, contains an obscene amount of fluff bc that is what i’m all about. i’ve never written smut before, so do give me constructive feedback if something comes to mind!! < 3

there is mature content under the readmore, so proceed with caution.

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One thing that I think is getting ignored in the Discourse of the Week is that the old zine happened years ago, back when the fandom for TAZ was still small and the boys had a lot less responsibility on their hands. They personally went through and supervised that and okayed that made sure it was for a charity they approved of and that was great, but even at its most hands off that was probably a lot of work, and a lot of stress. Now they have Babies and Responsibilities and are personally turning out like seven podcasts each. The graphic novel seems to mostly be Clint’s responsibility, a long term project, and even then they seem to be agonizing over every choice. Making anything in an unfamiliar medium and giving it an official seal of approval is going to be incredibly difficult. You’re turning something out and saying “yes, I approve of this” and that’s not something to take lightly. That’s probably part of the reason why merch is so thin on the ground. Four men with kids and full time jobs can’t do the work of an actual marketing team, and they don’t want to rubberstamp something without examining it when every choice they make is already getting looked at critically. 

As for unofficial merchandise, as soon as you start agreeing to that, vocally or simply though inaction, you start to lose rights. Intellectual property is important, especially for small creators who can’t afford to get into a legal battle later on down the line because they were too generous with rights earlier. The McElroys aren’t saying they’re personally going to sue creators, they’re making a public statement so that if later they need to prove in trademark court or whatever that they retained exclusive rights to their intellectual property, they can do so. It’s a pragmatic choice to protect the project going forward, not open season on fan creators. Fan artists and other content makers are always going to be pushing the thresholds of diversity, are always going to be there, making themselves a place. You can even get paid for it, as long as you’re subtle. You can acknowledge that without denying that these are very busy men in a tricky legal situation trying to cover their bases so they can get back to creating and taking care of their families. They’re not a big corporation, they don’t have the security of some huge network tv program. Even popular indie creators can get taken advantage of and they’re just trying to avoid further drama down the line.  

anonymous asked:

I don't know if you'd know anything about this and it's a bit of a long shot... but do you think someone who was a psychopath would react differently to torture? Anyway thanks for reading this

That’s an interesting question and I’m afraid I don’t know.

I’ve had quite a few private conversations with both askers and other members of the Script Family about what effects neurodivergence might have in the context of torture. But the truth at the moment is we don’t know at all.

The data we have is either historical (the figures I have on forced confessions come from analysis of French cases between 1500 and 1700) which doesn’t consistently provide that sort of information on victims or to sparse on the subject to draw conclusions.

Trying to examine victims runs up against the problem of recognising what is ‘normal’ variation in response to torture and what is due to their condition.

Experiments are pretty ethically fraught and difficult to get approval for to begin with. And that means most researchers see neurodivergence as a complicating factor rather than part of human diversity that needs further investigation.

So not only do we not know but we’re unlikely to find out any time soon.

My advice would be to treat the character as a neurotypical victim in terms of what they’re likely to experience and the effects they’re likely to suffer.

Neurodivergent people still feel pain, both emotionally and physically. And much of these responses are (so far as we can tell) rooted in how humans respond to pain.

We know that it’s impossible to predict which individuals will develop which symptoms in response to torture so I’d suggest picking symptoms that you feel mesh well with the condition your character already has.

I hope that helps and I’m sorry I can’t give you a more definite answer.

I can’t help thinking that there are probably thousands of victims suffering because we’ve never looked properly at the effects on neurodivergent people.  

Disclaimer

anonymous asked:

Hey mom! Could I have some headcanons about omegas that do martial arts? Thank you do much! Have a fabulous day!

  • They’re allowed to train with betas and alphas until they’re about 6 or 7 (depending on the skills of the alphas and the betas). After that, they’re separated into dynamics
  • While alphas and betas are further separated into age groups, omegas are kept all together, seeing as very few go beyond a certain skill level, it’s considered safe for them to train all together
  • Basically you can have 15 year old omegas training alongside 5 year old omegas
  • Omegas can only earn a certain number of belts before they have to stop advancing (this is usually when sparring becomes necessary)
  • Omegas can spar with other omegas, but it’s uncommon. Omegas never spar with betas or alphas in clubs
  • That being said, the few omegas that do advance have to effectively sign their lives away, signing documents to show they understand the risks, they won’t sue the club for any injury they sustain, and they’ll play by the rules
  • However, not all clubs will agree to train omegas, because they believe if may reflect badly on them if the omega gets hurt
  • Omegas that pass into the sparring stage also have to take scent suppressors, so as to ensure a fair fight
  • They’ll begin sparring against betas, and even in professional fights its rare that an omega and an alpha will go head to head
  • Olympic and international level martial arts omega are incredibly rare, for the sole fact that it’s so bloody difficult for them to actually get to that level
  • There are also a lot of issues with the scent suppressors they take, because only a few are approved and deemed to not give unfair advantages, and those ones can often have really nasty side effects

anonymous asked:

How does Fe loop work in an ENTP? Think I might be in one and I'm not sure what to do about it…

What is an Ne-Fe loop like?

Under normal circumstances, Fe in general usually seeks to understand another’s feelings and be attentive to the needs of others. This allows for a healthy appreciation of relationships and connections.

What does a healthy tertiary Fe look like?

In a healthy ENTP, tertiary Fe allows us to be more considerate of others and we seek to be more understanding of people and are likely to listen to their thoughts with empathy. It also makes us aware of how our behaviour can affect others and we are likely to adjust our way of interacting with others to ensure that there is a sense of cooperation.

Ti can overlook many aspects of the external world in its somewhat obsessive search for the whole truth. This causes the stereotypical cold, blunt and ‘I-don’t-give-a-fuck’ ENTP. Such ENTPs can overlook the importance of engaging with others to create an environment where ideas, thoughts and possibilities can be explored in a more cooperative manner.

Tertiary Fe helps to correct this weakness. It keeps us in check and reminds us to take consideration when presenting our thoughts and ensures that we understand and appreciate healthy connections with others.

What does an unhealthy tertiary Fe look like?

We become extremely sensitive to criticism and are likely to lash out for it. We are unable to handle disagreements and differences in opinions well, especially when this disagreement is acting against our Ne. This can cause us to seem cold, insensitive and extremely arrogant.

There is a strong need to be independent or, at the very least, be seen as being independent. For this reason, we are likely to refuse to acknowledge people’s opinions or even accommodate relationships, especially with our loved ones and people we care about. This is mostly due to believing that feelings are a weakness and that such a weakness can be used against us and also ruin our reputation.

With our Fe perspective, we can take advantage of the awareness of other people’s feelings and weaknesses to intentionally cause hurt and upset them. We can also use this knowledge to manipulate others into doing things we want or into liking us. This feeds our ego and gives us a false sense of confidence.

An example of this would be an ENTP acting nice and caring towards a person, not out of the goodness of their heart but with the intention of wanting to be liked by people. Later on, when the ENTP needs something from said person, they would guilt-trip the person into helping with something along the lines of, “I’ve done so much for you. I helped you when no one else did, and I’ve always been such a good friend. We’re friends, aren’t we? So you’ll help me, right? You’ll help me because I’ve always helped you, right? Because that’s what friends do, after all. And we’re friends.”

An unhealthy tertiary Fe can quickly lead to an Ne-Fe loop.

What does an Ne-Fe loop look like?

During an Ne-Fe loop, we tend to overlook or ignore the advice of our auxillary Ti. Fe is an extroverted function, similar to our dominant Ne, meaning that we can easily become heavily concerned about the external world. Without the introspective view provided by our auxillary Ti, it is very easy for us to become defensive about our inability to manage problems and blame our surroundings or other people instead of looking within ourselves and our own shortcomings.

Interestingly, those of us in an Ne-Fe loop have a constant need for approval from others. We aren’t consciously aware of this so it can be difficult for us to recognise that this is happening until either the situation gets out of hand or someone points it out to us.

There is a lot of insecurity involved and we have very little confidence in our ability to make decisions and good judgments without the approval of others. Wanting to feel confident about ourselves, we are likely to seek admiration by manipulating people and other social situations. There is a lot of anxiety about how people see us and a lot of pressure in wanting to be admired and seen as independent and capable.

This can manifest in wanting to achieve certain results such as getting the top grades, buying the best clothes etc. This puts us in situations which would, under normal circumstances, be unreasonable for us (such as taking on too many responsibilities than we are able to handle), and it also puts us under unnecessary pressure. Such an anxious and eager-to-please mindset takes a huge toll on our mental health, eventually leaving us unable to manage the issues created by our Ne-Fe loop.

How to get out of an Ne-Fe loop?

At first, an Ne-Fe loop can seem very empowering. It can seem like everything is under our control and that we have the ability to manipulate situations to fit our Ne’s liking. However, this later causes problems (both mentally and in our surroundings) that simply Ne and Fe can’t handle by themselves.

At this point, it is important to take a step back and reintroduce auxillary Ti to its rightful place. Healthy Ti helps us to make better judgments by allowing us to reflect on our decisions before we decide to act on impulse.

We can help re-engage our auxillary Ti by:

  • Considering possible future consequences of our immediate actions. (e.g. “By saying this, will I be seriously offending someone?”)
  • Taking into account the pros and cons of a decision. (e.g. “This subject seems the most exciting, however that subject has more opportunities to learn such and such.”)
  • Prioritising. (e.g. “Yes, I could work on that side-project now. It sounds like a good idea. However, then I would be taking out time that I could spend studying for my exams in the next two weeks. Hm. I’ll study for my exams instead and then, after they’re over, I can set aside time to work on my side-project.”)

I should note that there is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to achieve certain outcomes such as having good grades and whatnot which I mentioned earlier, but not at the expense of our mental health, and most certainly not while just running for it, hoping it will happen, our only intention being to impress others.

With the help of Ti, and later Si, we can achieve specific results with better precision and carefully planned steps to ensure that we can do it to the best of our abilities. This will reduce wasted time, energy and errors while also helping us to be much happier and confident with our decisions.

Related: What is an Si-grip like?

Stuck

I’m stuck, and I’ve been like this for a long time. I’m stuck in life. I recently may have discovered that I have a mental deficiency that has potentially prevented me from accomplishing A LOT — a deficiency that, honestly, has put me at a standstill numerous instances in my life. I’m 99.9% sure I have ADHD. I just need a professional diagnosis to confirm that. I’m not going to go into details as to how I discovered that, but just know I’ve done extensive research and the symptoms are all there.

Here’s the catch: I no longer have insurance, which means it would cost me a pretty penny to get diagnosed and, if needed, buy medication. “So why don’t I just apply for insurance?” Well, that’s definitely the logical idea, but just getting approved could take weeks to months. In my twisted head, that’s too daunting of a setback to want to even try to apply. Then, if I do that, I also have to consider the time it could take me to get an appointment booked. In the meantime, I’m finding it very hard to muster up the focus that most people have to accomplish these crucial issues.

If something seems too difficult, too tedious, or simply too boring, I completely STRUGGLE to engage. For as long as I can remember, I have always thought there was something wrong with me. I’ve always been aware of all this potential I have but I could not understand why it was so tough for me to focus, especially when some of these tasks were very important. My parents don’t really even know this, but the year before last I randomly dropped out of college because I couldn’t do the homework if it didn’t intrigue me, and during boring lectures I would involuntarily zone out or doodle to pass the time, which obviously damaged my grades. This inability to focus when it’s vital has essentially begun to cripple my growth and very negatively impact me. Not only do I feel stuck, I feel like nobody in my life understands the severity of this situation and how badly I need help. I don’t want to go back into a depression. I just want to be okay.

Two Worlds - Frederick Chilton

P/N: At last, I finally was able to come up with something for Chilton! Lately, I’ve been missing Chilton. I was waiting for inspiration to hit me. I hope you all enjoy!

Frederick Chilton x Reader

Imagine: Confronting Chilton about your recent feelings of insecurity.


When she first met Chilton, he had this commanding facade about him. His straight and stiff posture flashed of confidence from across the room. Maybe his confidence was even on the border of narcissism. From his neatly combed hair, to his impressively groomed beard, his attire was nothing short of prestige. His eyes were like the color of freshly printed bills, a reflection of his wealth. Despite the cane he heavily relied on, he made sure that there was nothing he lacked. Everything about him screamed that he was a very put together man, but it didn’t hide the aching desire to be validated underneath that pretentious mask.

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Answering asks #3

l-der asked:

Can I ask for your fav TaeJin moment? 


Sure! But that is so difficult to answer cause taejin is such a blissful pair and they spoil me with so many epic moments. Cause I feel that since 2016 they’ve decided to just let it all out and just dont even try to hide the fact they are a couple anymore. So now we’re getting tons of obvious hints they are dating and its amazing but hard to pick just 1 favorite moment. But I’ll give you some of my faves:

PUBLIC TAEJIN

Blood Sweat and Tears music video + MAMA performance and fancam love. What I love about these moments is that the MV is a public and management approved push on Taejin as a pairing. The fact it happened in 2016 adds to my theory that Jin & V were already involved in late 2015 and their management probably is aware of it. 

I think it was a clever management move to start pushing Taejin publicly if they knew about their romance, cause supporting them as a ship in the MV and events as MAMA would also mean to let them interact like a couple without raising suspicion. This way, for the fandom, Taejin is only the visuals ship who are “having moments” to promote the MV concept and nothing else. For the grand public it is harder to see Taejin’s real reason to be acting like a couple aka reality if it is hidden in plain sight disguised as just Taejin pairing for fantasy/aesthetics. 

And what I love the most about those fan cam moments is that V is so happy, like truly proud of being together with Jin like that in public. He is so precious holding him and body language claiming Jin as his.

CANDID TAEJIN 

Cause there is beauty and true real couple second nature to how they walk around right?! The Las Vegas pic is just art since they had no idea they were photographed (we can exclude them being cute for fanservice) and yet there you have it Jinnie & VV locking arms like real couples do.

THE UNDENIABLE MOMENT 

Self-explanatory. 

I also love Jinnie & VV mirroring, body language, couples outfits, jealousy…if any of you want master posts on these moments give me a shout.

Thanks for the ask. Let me know your fav moments too! 

Lots of love.

anonymous asked:

lance saying “ teach me how to kiss? ” to keith (also ily and i hope you feel better <3)

thank u so much!!! 💖💖

also sorry this was delayed. it got pretty long. I’ll probably make a thing on ao3 for all my little oneshots

this also turned more into a hurt/comfort rather than fluff. it gets fluffy tho

inspired by art

Was it the calm silence of Lance’s room that made loneliness seem a lot more prominent?

The quiet hum of the oxygen regulator filled the room, but Lance’s mind felt even louder. It wasn’t odd for Lance to feel lonely. Growing up the youngest sibling allowed him the most attention, and as his brothers and sisters had kids of their own, he became the leader to a bunch of toddlers.

Lance was used to attention, he was used to validation. Now, he was lightyears away from home in the middle of an intergalactic war. There wasn’t time for him to be coddled, despite him really needing it, or at least wanting it.

Though he would never admit that.

On the surface of things, everyone else seemed mostly fine. Sure Pidge was still on a search for the large majority of her family, and Keith still was lost with himself, but Lance still felt as if he needed some sort of reassurance.

It felt dirty. It felt dirty to feel so unnecessarily needy. Hunk missed his family just as much as Lance did his, and Allura on the hand, lost hers entirely. Lance felt no way near obligated to complain, or even ask for help.

Lance felt his heart sink in its cavity. He could stare up at the ceiling all he wanted, but they never were going to have the same stars as his did back home. Whenever Lance felt lost, he would count the numerous of glow in the dark stars. And when the nights felt darker than usual, nights where his mind felt too heavy to carry, he would climb into his parents bed.

His dad would question it from time to time, but his mother being the more nurturing of the two, would allow it. She would wrap a tiny arm around him and hold him near until the anxiety settled. Nights like these, where Lance can hear the rise and fall of his chest come in waves, and the beating of his heart ring in his ears, make him miss home all the greater.

This burning inside of him needed to be put out, but no matter how much he tossed and turned, the fire still raged on. The anxiety still raged on. The undeniable fact that he’s witnessed death during this war, the fact that he might not even make it home alive, the fact that he might not be contributing all he possibly can, rages on.

Lance wanted to be held, he needed to be held. He wanted his mom to hold his shaking body close to her chest and whisper, “Todo estará bien, mijo.”

But sometimes, we don’t always get what we want.

Before Lance’s mind could catch up with him, his legs were already up and out of bed. He needed comfort, needed reassurance that things would be fine. Things would be alright. He pulled on his fuzzy lion slippers and made the short walk to the even shorter tempered, Keith.

Had Keith not be the new leader, or had their rooms not be so close together, maybe then Lance would have searched for comfort elsewhere. Except, he and Keith were getting closer with each talk they had. Each day that passed, they grew a better understanding of each other. If Lance allowed himself to be vulnerable, maybe that would bring them closer together.

Because in reality, Keith was a pretty great person. He was headstrong and brave, with a way of carrying himself. His independence was what made him a difficult leader at first, but Lance could admire how well he handled himself on his own.

Lance was the complete opposite.

Lance wanted approval, he wanted attention. He wanted to be told he was important. If Lance were to have only one flaw, it would be his dependence on others’ opinions. It made him a more insecure person, and overall, paladin.

Insecurity and loneliness was a match made in hell. But to fight it, was to meet it face to face in the belly of the beast. To address the problem would be to acknowledge it was there, and Lance had a habit of trying to play off as if he was the most confident person in the room. But walls of bravado could only stay up for so long, he needed to let someone in eventually.

So knocking on Keith’s door in the middle of the night, was Lance’s version of a cry for help. Luckily, Keith was more than happy to oblige.

Lance felt his heart pound with every faint step he could hear behind Keith’s door. At least Lance knew Keith was awake, that he wouldn’t stay in bed as a way of shooing Lance away. At least he’s putting in the effort to see what Lance needs, maybe the small acknowledgment is what brought Lance to ask the following question.

Keith opens the door, tiny bags beneath his eyes. Clearly he’s tired, but still willing to see what Lance would want. Given the soft expression on Lance’s face, he could tell something was up.

Keith’s posture changes, uncrossing his arms to let Lance in too, “What’s wrong?”

“Can…. can I lay down with you for a moment?” Lance looks down at his hands, peeling and picking at the skin. His eyes looked tired, and his voice was wavering.

Keith knew something was wrong, but the question definitely threw him off. Keith was prepared to assure Lance with a, “no there’s no ghosts on the ship”, or a, “we’ll get home eventually”. But he looked so lost, so vulnerable. Keith wanted to say no, for his own piece of mind, but everything was compelling him otherwise.

His stepped back, tripping over his own feet. Flustered, yes, but Keith manages a small nod and extends his arm towards his bed. “Sit..”

Lance gives Keith a small nod and steps over to Keith’s bed. He sits down, looking anywhere but at Keith.

Keith watches Lance, cautiously. He could feel his pulse in his ears, he was so worried his entire head felt as if it were throbbing. “Are you okay?” Keith manages to ask, despite it taking every ounce of his strength to keep himself from stuttering. He sits beside Lance and hesitates before resting a hand on his shoulder.

Lance nods, staring down at his hands, neatly folded on his lap. “I’m just sleepy…” There were more reasons for why he felt awful than why he felt okay, but sleepiness was not one of them.

“I see that… but why are you in my room?” Keith quickly adds, “Not that I don’t want you here. I’m just confused as to why you wanna be here.”

Lance takes a long pause before answering. His eyes wander from Keith’s jacket hanging in the furthest corner of the room, to a small desk in the other. His mind was trying to pull any slight distraction. How barren the rooms are here don’t particularly help with that. At least back at home, the numerous of posters and trinkets that gave Lance’s room it’s own appeal, would give his eyes something to rest on when he would freak out. Now, it’s nothing. It’s a blank wall, with boring blankets. “Do you ever get lonely?” Lance clicks his tongue against his teeth, “I know that you’re the loner and whatever but even loners get lonely too, right?”

Keith would admit, it stings that this character archetype of ‘loner’ fit so well. Keith would also admit that yes, he gets lonely too. Though he never chose to be lonely to begin with, he did choose to consistently stay lonely out of fear of losing someone again.

So Keith nods, moving his hand across Lance’s back, “Everyone gets lonely, it’s normal.” It was logic Keith applied to himself as well. Everyone gets lonely, especially during the middle of the night where you’re alone in your room. However Keith knew that Lance wasn’t just ‘everyone’. Lance was Lance, and if something were to be dwelling inside him enough to make him come forward to Keith, then there must be something deeper than just loneliness. “There’s something else too, what’s the matter?”

Lance heaves a heavy sigh and rests his head in his hands, “I can’t… quite explain it.” He tries his best to explain, “I miss earth and before you say anything, I know everyone else does too.” Lance shifts in his seat to bring his knees up to his chest. “I miss my mom. Whenever I would freak out she would kinda just, hold me?” He chuckles, visibly shaking at this point, “Lame right?”

Keith shakes his head, “Not lame. You miss your family, there’s nothing lame about that.” He rubs his back and pulls Lance a little closer. Keith could feel Lance shaking but maybe if he rested his head against his, it would help calm him down. If he came here for reassurance, Keith is more than happy to offer it.

It’s surprising that Lance couldn’t hear Keith’s heart fluttering beneath his ribcage as he did so. It wasn’t everyday Lance asked for help, let alone in the middle of the night. Or even, with this kind of problem. Pointers on his combat techniques was one thing, emotional support was another. But Keith is willing no matter what.

Lance yawns, “I don’t really wanna talk about it… can I..” He looks up at Keith, fear biting at his tongue, begging him to revert and keep his mouth shut, “Can we.. lay down.. I can’t sleep. I’m tired, and I know you are too… If it’s weird for you then–”

“–No!” Keith blurts immediately but the second he does, he can see the hurt already forming in Lance’s eyes. Every butterfly in his stomach that bloomed the second Lance walked in, turned to wasps. Keith could feel each and every one stab at his sides as Lance’s expression faltered– even in the slightest. “I mean.. no, it’s not weird.” Keith takes a breath, trying to recollect himself, and hearten Lance after that almost casualty, “Yeah, laying down would be fine. Do you want to get under the blanket?”

Lance’s expression softens again. He softly nods and waits for Keith to lay down first. He watches Keith move away from him and move to the inner part of the bed, closer to the wall. Keith gets under the blanket first and lifts it enough for Lance to slide in.

Lance already feels his anxiety start to cool down. He needed a body next to him to reassure that he wasn’t as alone as he thought. What Lance needed was a sense of familiarity when he was so far away from it. Maybe Keith and Lance weren’t the closest of friends back on earth, but for some strange reason, laying down next to him felt a lot like home.

The twin mattress didn’t allow a lot of space between the two, but neither them seemed to mind. Not that either of them would admit that.

Lance reaches out to Keith, hand hesitant to touch him. He’s gotten this far, the last thing he wanted to do was make this weird.

“Are you okay now?” Keith asks, quietly, almost scared to break the silence that did a little less than comfort him. He looked at Lance’s hands and on impulse, takes them into his own.

Lance blushes and moves closer to Keith, pressing his forehead against his, and entangling their legs together. “I feel better, yeah.” Silence. “So how was your day?”

Keith laughs quietly beneath his breath, “Good, how was yours?” He moves his legs closer to Lance’s.

“It was fine. It’s better now though,” Lance smiles and closes eyes now that he’s able to relax.

A few ticks pass and a question begins pondering in Keith’s mind. He’s holding Lance’s hands, their legs are wound up together, and now his chin is resting on the top of Lance’s head. From Lance’s knocking on the door to now, Keith’s heart went from a fast beat to a soft flutter. Then it hit him, “Are we cuddling?”

Lance at this point thought it was obvious. They were holding each other as they laid there, and every so often Lance would feel relaxed enough to close his eyes. The comfort put him at ease, and every time he opened them, Lance would stare directly at Keith. So, of course, Lance felt compelled to answer truthfully, “Yeah,” he says in-matter-of-factly. He moves his head to look up at Keith, who now looks a little worried. The expression made Lance’s stomach sink, “Why, does it bother you?”

Keith shakes his head and places his chin against Lance’s forehead, unconsciously pressing his lips against it as well. “No,” Without intending to, Keith places a small kiss on Lance’s forehead, “It’s nice..”

A part of Lance wants to ask how Keith could just do that. How he could just go on and kiss Lance’s forehead as they cuddled.

Damn bitch, you really gonna go ahead and make me fall in love with you?

But he didn’t want to ruin the moment, (was this even a moment?)

It most definitely was.

Lance’s cheeks are burning. If he weren’t blushing before, he sure as hell was now. Lance moves closer to Keith and rests his head against his chest, “How can you do that?”

“Do what?” Keith asked, knowing damn well what Lance meant. Keith was a blushing mess too, but it felt necessary to give Lance that sort of affection. Keith wanted to give all the affection Lance could ever need, but he had to start slow and start somewhere.

“Teach me,” Lance asks, gripping on to Keith’s shirt. “Teach me how to do that.”

“Do what?” Keith tilts his head, genuinely confused.

“Teach me how to kiss,” Lance motions towards his forehead, “Teach me how to kiss without freaking out, how do you do that?” At this point, Lance is looking up at Keith, red in the face. He can still feel Keith’s warmth on his forehead, as if he never left. Yet Lance, still wants him to do it again and again.

“No, I’m definitely freaking out,” Keith mutters, eyes dashing left and right to keep from looking directly at Lance. “Kiss?” He asks, “It was affection.”

“Your mouth pressed skin, it was a kiss.” Lance pouts and crosses his arms, “It still counts.”

Keith arcs a brow, “I’m pretty sure kissing is something else entirely.”

Lance shakes his head. Did Keith place his lips on Lance? Yes. Did Lance’s heart skip a beat as he did so? Yes.

So it was a kiss, nonetheless.

“It was a kiss, you kissed me.”

“Lance, if I kissed you, you wouldn’t be babbling so much,” Keith now crosses his arms, pouting. Without knowing how much his comment implies kissing Lance again, Lance still caught on.

“I always babble. Babble, babble, babble,” Lance babbles.

Maybe it was because Keith wanted to shut Lance up, or maybe it was because he wanted to show Lance what a real kiss was, or maybe Keith kissed Lance because of the slight possibility he liked him back. Whether it be one of those possibilities, or all of the above, Keith softly grasps Lance’s chin and pulls him in for an even softer kiss.

When he pulls away, Keith looks and sees the stars in Lance’s eyes. His mouth hung agape, dumbfounded, and as Keith predicted, Lance was too dazed to say anything else.

“See?” Keith pokes, “No babbling.” Though Keith on the other hand, could feel his heartbeat in his chest. His face was warm, and having it pressed against Lance’s cool skin was more than just refreshing. The second he pulled away, he already wanted to do it again.

Lance stares up at Keith, unable to form any coherent sentences in his mind. The grip he had on Keith’s shirt tightens, pulling Keith closer. “I…” Lance tries his hardest to say something, anything that would let Keith know that he can kiss him again if he wanted to. But to no avail, Lance shuts his mouth tight, in a straight line, and presses his forehead against Keith’s yet again.

“Not gonna ask me how to teach you?” Keith manages to throw a small jab in, despite his insides feeling like jelly. He does however, smile. Being this close to Lance made the entire war seem worth it if it brought them together. It felt selfish to admit, and it probably was, but Keith was happy that there might be a bigger something other than justice.

Love? Probably.

However Lance just shakes his head. But he wouldn’t push Keith away if he kissed him again, if anything, Lance would encourage him to do so if he could find the strength and mental power.

“Are you okay?” Keith asks, a little scared that he might of just scared Lance away.

Though Lance nods his head giving some of that reassurance that Keith needed. “I’m  more than okay…” he mumbles.

Keith smiles and tries to unhinge Lance’s death grip from his shirt. He holds his hands yet again and interlaces their fingers together. “Do you want me to do it again?” Lance nods, and Keith leans in again to kiss him.

When Keith pulls away, somehow among the numerous of tiny kisses, Lance gained the courage to kiss him again on his own accord. Lance never would have guessed himself as a handsy kisser, but with each kiss he made, Lance found his hands tugging somewhere in Keith’s hair.

Lance’s grip on Keith’s hair seemed to give Keith the okay of holding Lance’s face in his hands. Keith rubbed his thumbs against Lance’s blushing cheeks. It was amazing and utterly confusing to how Lance seemed to stay cool during this. The contrast of warmth radiating off of his hands and Lance’s lower body temperature, made each kiss feel like magic.

Keith wouldn’t admit it, but he would fight a thousand wars to kiss Lance like this again.

And Lance wouldn’t admit it but, each kiss he and Keith shared made him feel as if he never left home– as if he never knew the pain of leaving.

At the end of the night, Lance and Keith would be wrapped in each other’s limbs. Arms wrapped around backs, and legs entangled with each other’s. The morning after at breakfast, they would be holding pinkies underneath the table.

Chasing Cars

i.e. Jimin and his girlfriend have some über angsty moments in Hawaii

Jimin x Reader

Word Count: 8472 (haha at least it’s not as long as Tae’s) whoops, did I just make a double entendre???

Genre: Angst, angst, some more angst, haha whoops my hand slipped (more angst), and of course, to top it all off, a dash of fluff! (’cause who would I be if I didn’t put in some fluff???)

A/N: Ohhh boiiii. Someone stop me, my hands just can’t seem to stop typing? So, to those of you who were wondering about poor Park Chim Chim’s girlfriend in Walking on air (which you can read here), here we are! The third installment to my BTS Drabble series! (You don’t have to read the others to know what’s going on.) Buckle up ‘cause it’s gonna be a bumpy ride!

Song: Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol (love this song)


There as no easy way to take the new information that the pregnancy test was providing right in the palms of your hands. You had begun to suspect that you might be pregnant a few days ago when your period still hadn’t come after about a week after you usually started. No blood. No cramps. Nothing. So after waiting a while with nothing to even remotely console you, you decided you’d check to confirm, only to find that your results were very positive.

Tragically, this wouldn’t be the first time you’d conceived in your time with Jimin, but the last time you had miscarried within the first month.

You’d never told Jimin. You weren’t sure you ever would.

You didn’t want anything to even remotely affect Jimin’s career. He was in the prime of his life, at the mature age of 26, going on 27. BTS were still going strong despite all of the new, and old competition in the industry, and you just didn’t want to trouble Jimin further. He had so much on his plate to deal with already.

Soft knocks came from the bathroom door, and you were brought out of your reverie by Jimin’s inquiring voice. . “Y/N, are you alright? You’ve been in there for a while…”

“Umm… yeah. I’ll be out in a second.”

You heard Jimin shuffle away from the door, and away from your unsettled breaths as you looked once more at the positive results on the pregnancy strip before tearing off several sheets of toilet paper and wrapping the evidence up tightly. You decided you would discard of it later somewhere Jimin would never find it, and flushed the toilet.  

Stuffing the test in the waistband of your jeans, you walked back out to your bedroom where you found Jimin packing for the trip to Hawaii. He turned to you at the sound of the bathroom door opening, and smiled.

“Jagi~” He cooed as he walked over and pulled you in for a long hug. “Is everything alright? You look exhausted. Are you sure you’re up for this trip?”

He pulled away to look at you. “Pssh. Of course! I’m not going to miss out on a chance to go to Hawaii! Who do you think I am?”

He rolled his eyes. “You’re Y/F/N, the most wonderful girlfriend in the entire world. How could I possibly forget?” Jimin pecked your lips with his impossibly plush, soft ones, and though it was only for a moment, you melted into his warm touch.

“How did I get so lucky, huh?” He pressed his forehead against yours, gazing into your eyes. “We should finish packing up. The van will be here in less than two hours.”

You scoffed at him. “We? You’re the one who put off packing until the last minute! Don’t bring me into this, it’s not my responsibility.” You poked Jimin in the side, and he yelped in surprise.

“Yah! What’d you do that for?”

You turned away, heading out of the bedroom to throw away your pregnancy test before yelling back. “For being lazy!”

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steven-hairrington  asked:

Can you write about Karen’s opinions on her kids’ adventures? And her finding out about all the drama? 💗💗

Karen Wheeler liked to bake.

It was a coping mechanism brought about by too many PTA meetings. Rarely, she found, did people bother you when you were baking. Make the excuse of sticky hands or a request for dish duty, and people were generally quick to vacate the area. It allowed her a small spot in her life to think; to really take in the general calm and quiet she found scarce in a house full of three children.

So Karen Wheeler liked to bake.

She enjoyed the scent of melted butter, the sound of crackling spices, and the overall warmth that always emitted from her oven. It was comforting. The pie, she would think, was for Nancy’s debate team, the cookies for Mike’s latest D&D campaign, and the cake for Ted’s boss so he might finally get that promotion. She could think and bake and everything was normal. Perfectly, enjoyably normal. Karen Wheeler had never looked much for excitement.

But then Will Byers went missing. He went missing biking home from her house and, suddenly, Nancy was having sex, Mike was skipping school, and Joyce was kicking her out of her house.

Okay, so, Joyce was going through a lot. Karen understood that she wasn’t in the best frame of mind and needed her space.

And Nancy, well, Nancy was a teenager. Quite honestly, Karen was just relieved her daughter had waited until high school to finally pop the proverbial cherry. She remembered quite a few of her own former classmates who, in the dull heat of small-town Hawkins, had saddled up much too young behind the middle school bleachers. At the very least, Nancy had waited until she felt ready with a guy she clearly liked and an age that wasn’t entirely horrible. Karen couldn’t say she approved, but she wasn’t about to get angry about it.

She just thought Nancy would have known that.

But it was okay. Sex was a difficult topic for anyone to discuss, let alone a teenager with their parents. Karen understood. Her daughter was always so straight-laced, she had to be getting some sort of high out finally pulling something so “rebellious.”

Karen snorted as she plated a pie. Yeah, rebellious, right. Oh, the stories she could tell.

But that was neither here nor there. The sex wasn’t the issue. Hiding the fact that she’d been having sex while her best friend went missing was a slightly more important nugget of information. No matter that the cops seemed convinced Barbara had run away, Karen trusted Nancy. If her daughter said that wasn’t what happened, then she was inclined to believe her.

The problem was that Nancy wouldn’t talk to her!

What had she done that her children felt they couldn’t talk to her anymore?

She understood they were grieving. God above, even she was wallowing in some sort of third-degree heartbreak over Will’s death. The poor child had always been so kind - the only one of her son’s friends that ever offered to help with the dishes - and part of her couldn’t imagine the hole his absence would leave in her house. So, she understood the grief, but where Nancy was somewhere within the range of what she expected, Mike was just acting weird. 

Her Michael. Her sweet son who was always a quick jump and away from inviting at least one of his friends over, was being sneaky. Skipping school, not eating, spending far too much time in the basement? All of those she could maybe explain away, but laughing at his best friend’s funeral? Not going to Will’s school assembly?

That was not her Michael.

Her Michael was the boy who’d broken down into tears in her arms. Her Michael threw tantrums at the dinner table when he was told he couldn’t look for his friend. Her Michael did not hide things.

Only he was. He was hiding things. He wasn’t talking to her. What had she done wrong? Did her children think she wouldn’t care? Did they think she wouldn’t understand?

She would! Or, if she didn’t, she would certainly try.

But they wouldn’t even give her the chance.

And Karen Wheeler felt like she was standing at the very edge of a story she had only one foot in. A story, she would later learn, that involved her son suddenly caught up in a government conspiracy about Russians and a little girl she’d unknowingly harbored in her basement for a week.

To think, her son had hidden another person in her house for a whole week and she hadn’t even known. Part of her found that terrifying. The part of her that had been taught how to pick locks was inordinately pleased. She got the impression that these government folks were not the friendliest of people and if Mike found it necessary to hide the little girl (because honestly, whatever the government needed with one of those couldn’t be good) then she trusted it was for the best.

She trusted her son. Even if he didn’t trust her back. 

But then she got a call, and her world shifted.

“She’s gone, she’s gone, she’s gone,” were the only words Karen could make out amidst her son’s sobbing. He was wrapped up in a blanket, surrounded by flashing lights and blaring sirens. There were bodies being carted out his school and his friends were a mess and all her son could say was, “she’s gone, she’s gone, she’s gone.”

She hugged him close. Rocking him in her arms as if he were a baby. She marveled at how warm he was, how alive, and how she never wanted to let him out of her sight ever again. He would not, she swore, end up like poor Will Byers.

Only poor Will Byers was alive. 

He was alive when they’d had a funeral for him and there was a body that had been found and Karen no longer knew what to think. The world didn’t make sense. Her daughter needed stitches from a cut in her hand (one frighteningly similar to the one on Jonathan Byers’, and when had Nancy started hanging with him?), and her boyfriend’s face looked like someone had taken a battering ram to it without so much as a warning.

What, she found herself thinking, was going on in this soap opera she had apparently lost the script to?

Sex, blood, child abduction and fake death. This wasn’t real life. This didn’t happen to normal, everyday people like Karen Wheeler. At least, she could reassure herself, it was over. Things would finally settle down.

Nope.

The girl - Eleven was her name (and wasn’t that a horribly inappropriate moniker for a child, no matter how much her son’s nickname fit) - was a tiny mop of a thing whose only real joy seemed to come from being as close to Mike as physically possible, and eating her body weight in Eggos on a daily basis. She just appeared out of the blue one day after Halloween, tailing after Mike as if she were born to do it, and by that point, Karen almost wasn’t surprised to learn she was the same girl that had hidden out in her basement last year. But even though the information threw her, Karen found she liked Eleven. She was quiet, but nice, and had such a zest for life that Karen sometimes caught herself smiling just at the thought.

Oh, and she was a telekinetic lab rat stolen from birth by the government as part of some sort of conspiracy involving illegal human experimentation and Russians.

Honestly, it was always about the Russians with those people.

So, a telekinetic girl. And Will Byers had been abducted by some sort of interdimensional monster straight out of a B-rank horror film and was now being haunted by its Lovecraftian overlord.

Karen stared. She stared long and hard at the assembly of people sitting in her living room, took in their expressions of “yes, this really is the truth and no we’re not crazy,” and made a decision.

Cookies. Yes, she was going to bake some cookies. Everything was better over cookies. Maybe, if the world was kind, she’d be able to make some sense of this in her kitchen.

Then again, as she’d just realized, the world was rarely so nice.