this was more emotional

salvainterra  asked:

i love mob so much please for the love of god tell me about ur feelings on 100% ecstasy

OH BOY WILL I !!! ABSOLUTELY 100% (pun unintended but warmly embraced) 

out of all the 100% events, ecstasy is my favorite. the drama… the tragedy… will fiction EVER peak like this again? i don’t think so. but BEFORE I DELVE INTO ALL OF THAT, there’s something i want to talk about first: mob’s psychic powers as an expression of his emotions. 

we all know that mob suppresses his emotions to avoid outbursts of psychic power. but THAT implies that mob’s psychic power is a form of self expression, in the same way that body language is expression. 

he can direct his psychic powers – the same way we can direct our bodies’ actions – but there are other components that are difficult to stop, similar to how people’s shoulders tend to hunch when they’re angry or upset, how they subconsciously cross their arms and direct their feet away when something is making them uncomfortable, etc. 

unless you know about these bits of body language, and make a deliberate attempt to suppress them, it’s difficult to stop your body from revealing something about your emotions. similarly, one function of mob’s psychic power is as an extension of the way he expresses himself. these things happen subconsciously and mostly without mob’s control. 

for example, one of the trademarks of mob’s 100% events is that mob starts releasing waves of psychic power that push his hair back. other side effects include cracking the ground under him, often to dramatic effect.

mob doesn’t push his hair up on purpose, it’s just something that happens – as a result of him releasing his pent-up emotions in the form of psychic power. these little bits of expression aren’t something he can control.

mob also says something REALLY INTERESTING in his first 100% event:

during 100% rage mob uses his psychic powers to fight dimple, yes, but these lines suggest that his outburst of power happened because he finally had to express his anger. and that implies that, in order to show his emotions, and express himself, mob has to use his psychic powers. 

which is something he almost never allows himself to do. 

never forget the disdain / loathing mob had for himself at the beginning of the manga, and how convinced he was that he couldn’t allow himself to express himself OTHERWISE SOMETHING LIKE THIS WOULD HAPPEN. 

further material to consider: the lines that he said right before his 100% animosity / hostility event 

hostility… 

at this point, mob hasn’t taken any action against koyama yet. his outburst of psychic power, radiating outward and blanketing the area, is not doing anything but expressing his hostility – to the extent that mob expects koyama to be able to feel it. 

in addition to that, during mob’s fight with toichirou, he cycles rapidly through a LOT of emotions, and this is what he says about it:

canon suggests that it’s not just a buildup of of emotions that cause his powers to run amok; allowing his powers to run amok also allows himself to feel the full intensity of his emotions. his psychic powers are key to expressing himself.

I COULD GO ON… but i’ll just leave things here for now. to summarize: mob subconsciously uses his psychic powers to express his emotions, which is why suppressing his emotions also suppresses his psychic powers. 

figure 1: a helpful venn diagram of things 

which brings us to the REALLY SAD, BITTERSWEET, MOURNFUL TRAGEDY THAT IS 100% ECSTASY. 

the fight against toichirou is possibly the first time mob has been able to fully utilize his psychic powers. the first time he’s had to, even. all the unconscious limits he’s put on himself – not allowing his psychic power to go free, stifling his emotions and powers – all come undone. 

mob is allowing himself to be himself, wholly and fully. he’s removed his inhibitions. he’s running wild and free. he’s no longer expending energy trying to regulate his psychic powers – he’s allowing himself to feel. this intensity of emotion and action is something mob has never given himself before, and the freedom of it… feels good. incredibly so. he feels free, he feels alive, and toichirou – the only individual to ever stand on a level close to mob’s – understands perfectly. 

this is a level of joy mob has never felt before. 

the release of his psychic power even comes hand in hand with mob’s body language becoming much freer and more expressive than it is in daily life. look at him go!! mob, for the first time in years… letting himself feel the intensity of his emotions, just as they really are.  

but of course his happiness isn’t going to last 

because mob wants to be a part of society, and he thinks he has to keep his psychic powers sequestered away in order to do that. his greatest fear is accidentally hurting the people he loves with his own psychic power, and when he remembers that possibility… 

the tragedy of 100% ecstasy is that – for just a brief moment, mob released himself from his self-imposed limits. for a moment, he let himself really feel, he let himself be, and in that moment he experienced a richness, an intensity, a moment of being so utterly present and alive that it brought himself to heights he’d never reached before. 

 and mob will never willingly allow himself to do that ever again. 

salvador sobral: *tries to pass an important message about helping refugees but isn’t allowed to bc it’s too political*

salvador sobral: *thanks his sister and the composer luis figueiredo for making the song, giving them all the credit*

salvador sobral: *can’t get excited during the voting bc of his heart condition but when his sister is singing on stage he flails adorably at her performance*

salvador sobral: *during the press conference always refers to THE SONG WINNING - NOT HIMSELF bc that’s it’s the song that really matters*

salvador sobral: *doesn’t consider himself a national hero, he just wants to sing and live a peaceful life, he just hopes the song can make a change*

salvador sobral: *makes a slightly bad worded speech directing at ALL POP MUSIC, and NOT just for Eurovision competitors*

amar pelo dois: *a song with no specified gender, no specified sexuality, just the simplicity and strength of emotions conveyed in song can be applied to almost anyone over the world if you empathize with it, uniting people with a language that not the majority of the world knows about*

tumblr salty people: dude this guy is an arrogant shit saying he’s better than everyone what does he know about eurovision it’s supposed to be glamorous and full of glitter how straight is this guy with his incestuous boring duet ballad that puts anyone to sleep

me: ……….

2

Hey so this is a really long shot but my cat is lost. I depend on her for so much. She’s the living embodiment of my fight for mental stability, I adopted her exactly a year after I was released from the hospital after threatening suicide. She means so much to me and she’s lost because my dad let her out of the house when she was annoying him. I live in Plymouth Minnesota. It’s cold as fuck here and it’s supposed to snow tonight. Please try to get the word around.

4

We put the good in the good in the good life
We put the bad in the past, now we alright.

can you believe everyone fell in love with Finn the minute they saw him? like wow. He’s truly an iconic hero.

shoutout post for all u dms and gms out there (especially you newbie ones), y’all have such a difficult medium of storytelling to work with and it must feel like you’re herding cats 99.8% of the time but you guys have the absolutely amazing ability to engage your players in such a rich world where their words and actions matter and you turn absolute chaos into such a beautiful story that your players are so proud and happy to have had a hand in shaping and just….you’re all fantastic and i love you