this was also funny as hell


Okay. So I finally got my hands on the one Ninjago set I’ve wanted more than anything. So everything was good. Well today did get better, and by better I mean something really funny happened.

So basically, after we left Target, my brother, being a ten year-old. Did what younger siblings do best. Annoy their older sibling(s). As we walked through the mall he was following me saying “Ninjago sucks!” over and over again. I ignored him. Only threatening to send him to Hell once(twice) . And after enduring my mother’s long trip to Nordstrom Rack. (10 minutes is a long time to look at clothes.) We got in the car to head home.

  But, then my mother and Grandmother who was also there. Decided to go to TJ Maxx because they wanted to look at more clothes. I did not want to get out of the car, and neither did my brother. So I was stuck with him.

  We argued a bit after he insulted Ninjago again and I attempted to dump a bottle of water on his head, but thought better of it. Then there was a few minutes of silence while he played with the Lego he got and I just sat there appreciating the box in my hands. This silence lasted until out of nowhere my brother shouts “Fuck You Jay Walker!”  Hearing this. I lunged at him only to (lucky for him) look out the window on his side and see a man in a white short sleeved shirt and jeans. Jaywalking. He was yelling at the man. When I realized this we both started laughing our asses off until the adults got back.

In conclusion. Idk it was funny so I thought I'd  share.

anonymous asked:

i am also a fan of the aramis & constance sibling dynamic especially because they are both married (or are in a secret but committed relationship with) two of each other's best friends so i just imagine them bumping into each other on the grounds like "OH HELLO aramis what a coincidence why don't you take a stroll with anne my legs are getting tired" and anne is so happy that her two Fav People are also each others favs


And the award for my favorite part of YOI episode 5 goes to:


This blatant misspelling of the name of the country where this entire show was made:


Diego Luna/Felicity Jones + mescal 

reasons to love lindsay jones

alright listen i totally planned to write a whole long list out for this but then i started thinking about lindsay and got distracted by how much i love her

Important things in Moana:
  • Moana is an awesome princess and one of the few characters that I got attached to at the start
  • The breathtaking scenery
  • Dwayne Johnson voices Maui
  • Heihei, who provided animal comedy relief without acting like a dog
  • Mini Maui, who was also a very funny character
  • Pua, who should’ve came with Moana on her journey
  • Grandma Tala
  • The way the ocean is personified
  • The scene that’s basically a huge Mad Max: Fury Road reference
  • The sadistic glam crab from hell that references David Bowie
  • The plot twist with the Lava Monster
  • The fact that Maui and Moana don’t become a couple
  • The soundtrack which is a million times better than Frozen’s
  • Moana is and always will be a much better movie than Frozen IMO
  • Basically nearly everything
  • I would gladly pay to see this movie again

Adele talks about Beyoncé in her interview for Vanity Fair 2016, stating “Beyoncé is her Michael Jackson.

 Beyoncé ALSO talks about Adele, stating “It is so easy to talk to her and be around her. She’s funny as hell and her comebacks are legendary. The most beautiful thing about Adele is that she has her priorities straight. She is a gracious woman and the most humble human being I’ve ever met.

Full Vanity Fair Interview Here

fic: No Strings

title: no strings.

genre: smut/humour

word count: 3000

description: Phil really misses sex and it turns out that Dan really misses sex, too. So…they just decide to have sex together. No strings. FWB minus the usual dramatic storyline that follows. Hilarity and #bants ensues.

“Just sex?” Phil repeats, “No strings?”

“Yes,” Dan nods, “that’s generally what no strings means,”

“Literally just sex?”

“Fucking hell. Look, Phil, I can spell it out for you or you can put your dick in my ass - it’s totally your choice. Have sex and be satisfied or wank alone to a Muse song again. What’s it gonna be?”

a/n: this is obviously smut but it’s actually funny too i promise, and it’s not like super graphic smut where you’ll cringe or whatever it’s…well, you’ll see. just read it and trust me.

Keep reading

why you should watch: what we do in the shadows

• the characters are cool and goofy and vampires
• like literally viago is pure as heck
• the actors are awesome
• they have jemaine clement ( vladislav ) who also voice acts as tamatoa from moana
• also taika waititi ( viago ) who directed this movie, eagle vs shark, boy and hunt for the wilderpeople
• 99% of the movie was improv
• the movie’s funny as hell
• its filmed like a documentary?????? isn’t that cool or what?????
• “werewolves not swear-wolves”
• there’s a video on “funny or die” where viago and vladislav explain truths about vampires
• all the characters make you want to hUG THEM
• stu’s my favourite
• i’d hug him
• yeah watch this movie

Scorpio's Opinion of the Signs
  • Aries: I like how passionate you are, but like could you maybe love me more? Or maybe like tell ME WHAT YOU FUCKING THINK it's annoying when you just shrug off important things.
  • Taurus: You're pretty okay, and when things are good, they're great. However, when things are bad they're fucking hell. Could you not hold a grudge for 3000000 years please?
  • Gemini: I mean, when we first started talking it was alright, but the second we became closer it was like "what are you and why don't you ever talk about anything even slightly important" You're funny tho
  • Cancer: I LOVE YOU, except for when you get really pissed off at tiny things. However, I really like how you know how to talk about things seriously and you can also be really sweet. You're so generous and caring.
  • Leo: Honestly, you're not all that too bad, until we start arguing. I only have problems with Leos who don't agree with me. When they don't, it's like world war 400 up in this bitch. But you're super funny, and I like your passion.
  • Virgo: Your attention to detail is appreciated, but I don't like the way you are stuck in your ways and can be stuck up. You're good for deep conversations and cuddles though.
  • Libra: As best friends, I love the shit out of you. As for a partner, you're way too flighty and change your mind too much and don't commit enough. I like how you see the good in everything.
  • Scorpio: I love other Scorpios, until we fight. An argument between two Scorpios will go on for literally years because neither one will give up. Sex between two Scorpios is hecka great though
  • Sagittarius: I like how unique you are. I like how much you like to put yourself out there and be seen, but sometimes it can be too much like narcissism and I don't like that. Also try to stop exaggerating.
  • Capricorn: Do you understand that ignoring people all the time is really annoying? Also stop trying to compete with me. I mean, besides that you're pretty good to talk to and you have a nice sense of humor.
  • Aquarius: I don't understand you, I don't understand why you don't feel things and that when you do you won't just say it, because talking about things helps so much. I like your mind though, I can have very intellectual conversations with you for hours.
  • Pisces: I adore you, until you're mad. Your look at the world is so dreamy and romantic, and I love that. I love how you can talk in depth about literally anything with me. I just don't like how you are such a demon when you're mad. It's like chill, you're a baby fish, you're not a swamp demon and you're not fooling anyone.

Okay, so YOI is probably going to end with Yuuri winning gold, marrying Viktor, and happily retiring from competitive skating.  And that will be a wonderful and satisfying end to the show and I’ll rejoice with the rest of the fandom.

But imagine if, instead of retiring this year, Yuuri goes back for one last season… and so does Viktor.  I want to see them being adorable and really competitive with each other.  @quetzalpapalotl and I were talking about it, and we had some ideas:

  • “I’m not going to go easy on you just ‘cause we’re married.”
    “Funny, I was going to say the same to you.”
  • Yuuri steps onto the ice, blows a kiss to Viktor, and says “You better be watching when I beat your score!”
    “As if I’d be looking anywhere else whether or not you beat me.”
  • “What is your inspiration for this season?”
    “I want to show my husband how much I love him and also give him hell.”
  • They’re competitive, but totally supportive.  If Yuuri beats Viktor’s score, Viktor is the most excited about it, and vice-versa.
  • They have a date night after every competition.  Whoever got the higher score gets to decide what they do.
  • They are still skating for each other and it’s their last season and they won’t have their husband going out with anything but a bang, so that means give him as much of a challenge as possible.
  • For both of them, it’s the most fun they ever have on the ice.

Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Evanuris Solas Way and i have the shiniest bald head (evanuris means bald) with no hair and pointed ears and icy grey eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me i look like an Anicent Elven God (if u don’t know who they are get da hell outta here!). I’m not related to Fen’Harel but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I’m an elf but I’m tall and way more knowledgeable than the Dalish. I have pale white skin like an egg. I’m also a mage, and I work with a group called the Inquisition where I’m in the inner circle. I’m a Rift Mage (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear tight pants. 

  • Portal: clean, cynical environment. not a lot of detail, but just enough to get the job done. cool boss fight. short, sweet, and to the point.
  • Portal 2: aaaAAAaaa look at these plants!!! all of the plants!! there's now a talking metal ball that's ur friend!! the murderous robot that u killed in the previous game is alive again and seems to know what she's doing, now with 2x the insults!! remember the metal ball friend?? he's now in charge of the entire facility and he's an asshole! the murderous robot lady is put into a potato, and you two are now accomplices! remember old aperture?? neither do we, but here it is anyways!!!! old aperture also has some gel that looks like nut!! your potato friend also has a tragic ass backstory!! your former metal ball friend is thrown into space bc he was an asshole!! CO-OP PLAY MOTHERFUCKERS