Hurt (Remus L. x Reader) [PART TWO]
A/N: ok so i really tried to format the paragraphs like the anon suggested where a new paragraph starts when each character speaks, but im not really comfortable with it and i feel like this turned out bad so i sincerely apologize
warning(s): not really any, i think??
Remus isn’t sure what he should say to her. How to explain to her the complex situation he’s in. The voice of doubt lingers in the back of his mind, but he decides to ignore it because [Y/N] is far too important.
“Why did you ask me to come out here, Remus?” she inquires softly, her hands shoved into her jacket pockets.
It’s been a few weeks since the breakup and the weather has turned freezing, prompting every student at Hogwarts to don their jumpers. Remus didn’t bother with one, though. He subconsciously believes that he deserves every bit of pain he gets and if that means risking hypothermia then so be it.
“I… I wanted to apologize about hurting you before.” he murmurs, his eyes looking directly at hers. He didn’t really plan to start out with that, but it is part of what he wanted to say. “It was inconsiderate of me to breakup with you like that. You deserve better.”
[Y/N]’s eyes soften slightly and she’s silent. Remus assumes she’s going to start yelling or get upset. He takes a moment to listen to the wind whistling through the trees. It’s just enough sound to distract him for a moment. Just enough to make him feel at peace.
It’s broken, however, when [Y/N] finally responds. “Look, Remus. Yes, it hurt when you broke up with me. I loved you.” She makes sure he’s looking directly at her. “I still do.” she murmurs so softly, Remus almost didn’t hear it. He says nothing and lets her continue.
“But what hurts more is that I don’t know why. I’ve spent the last few weeks asking myself if I did anything wrong or what you could possibly be hiding. It hurts because EVERYONE knows except me.” Remus’s heart aches when he notices her glassy eyes.
[Y/N] rubs them quickly as if they were never teary in the first place. Her voice raises as she becomes more emotional. “I tried to be understanding and respect that you have things you need to keep from me, but I’ve seen you come back with cuts and bruises, Remus! You have new scars that you look at during class and then you start tearing up and it breaks my heart because I know I can’t do anything to help you!”
Remus feels a familiar lump in his throat and he has to swallow it back or else it will come out as a small sob. His vision becomes blurry, but he ignores it. “I know it must have been very difficult on you and I’m so sorry for saying I don’t love you and putting you through all of that.”
[Y/N] crosses her arms and stares at the ground. “It’s still difficult on me.” she whispers. She takes a moment to presumably calm her emotions before raising her gaze to meet his. “I just… want to know what’s happening to you. I worry about you everyday.”
The male takes a deep breath and clenches his fists at his side as if the action alone will give him all the confidence he needs. “If I do tell you, will you promise you won’t become an Animagus like Sirius, James, and Peter and try to follow me whenever I leave?”
[Y/N]’s brows furrow. “Wait, what?”
Remus’s lips twitch into a smile. He’s always found [Y/N] cute when she’s confused. “Just promise.” His smile disappears and turns back into a nervous frown. “Please.”
The girl in front of him nods, albeit with hesitation. She extends her hand to him, her fingers curled into a fist except her pinky. Remus almost bursts into tears because he’s missed the little things like when she told him pinky promises were as good as an unbreakable vow. After he wraps his pinky around hers, he’s so caught up in his emotions and her homely eyes that he just spits it out.
“I’m a werewolf.”
The air is tense between the two and the only thing Remus can hear is his heart drumming against his rib cage.
Remus’s eyes widen and he swears every organ in his body stopped working. He doesn’t feel anything except shock. “I-I’m sorry, what do you mean ‘Oh’?” he manages out.
“Oh, as in ‘Oh, is that all?’” [Y/N] smiles shyly, making the male’s mouth part in shock.
“[Y/N], I love you, but I just spilled my deepest secret to you and you decide to say ‘Oh, is that all?’”
She steps forward, softly grabbing his hand and holding it with both of hers. “Remus, I don’t care that you’re a werewolf. I love you for you. All of you. Werewolf, too. This doesn’t change my feelings for you.”
He can only stand there, trying to process her response. “So, you don’t think I’m… an abomination?”
“Of course I don’t. You’re Remus Lupin, a genius student and a caring friend to the Marauders. Who I miss, by the way.”
He sighs and takes a deep breath of relief. “I can also be a pretty cool boyfriend if you’ll still have me.”
[Y/N] giggles and it’s music to Remus’s ears. It makes butterflies flutter in his stomach and his heart start racing again.
“I’ll always have you, Remus.”
He grins and envelopes her in a tight hug, lifting her off her feet. “I can’t tell you how much I love you.”
“You don’t need to.” she laughs out while he sets her down. Her hands lay themselves on his chest and her expression shifts from playful to loving. “I already know you do.”
She suddenly swats his chest. “But if you ever ignore me again, I will get Sirius to give you a talking to that lasts for months because I don’t have the heart and he WILL listen to me.”
“Sweetheart, I wouldn’t dare.”