this took me about 30 seconds

restingbitchfaceisnotsadface  asked:

"I can start with how I went to marine science camp as a kid and end with that time I accidentally brought a flamethrower into the county courthouse" --- PLEASE EXPLAIN IM SO CONFUSED D:

So, when I was a kid, my parents worked full time, so during the summer, my sister and I were enrolled in day-camp so we’d be adequately tired when we got home, and my FAVORITE  camp was Marine Science Camp, run by MSI on the banks of redwood creek, right off the San Francisco bay.  It was AWESOME: we got to dissect squid, there was a literal shark tank, which we got to fish leopard sharks out of and Tag Them For Scientific Research, ad we’d go out on the boat once a week and do things like haul a net full of fish out, use a scoop to study benthic creatures and look at plankton under a microscope.  I realize now we were essentially doing transects, dissections and other field/lab work for a bunch of grad students but it was FUN.  

I totally wanted to be a marine biologist when I grew up and would tell anyone who asked me what I was into about nematocyts and oceanic acidification until The Adult realized their mistake and fled.

At the same time, I was pursing an aggressive interest in the visual arts, which my parents heavily encouraged, becuase they are excellent parents and because it;s was a QUIET hobby unlikely to result in bodily harm, unlike my sister, who got into karate and Theater, which is a surprising dangerous combination.

But then i got to college and realized an issue with this plan: I, hands down, SUCK at chemistry.  I did okay in into becuase I’m great at taking standardized tests, and the teacher got suspended halfway through the semester for getting into a fistfight with another prof for poaching his grad student, but Organic Chemistry was a disaster.  I’ve never been good at arithmetic, and balancing chemical equations is something i need the dang molecule models for. So marine bio was a No-Go.

So I switched my major over to Art, which turned out to be kind of a disaster (the school managed to lose an entire semester of my grades because the Art Department kept really sloppy records and i ended up dropping out and resuming college elsewhere) and AMAZING, becuase I took a human figure drawing course with professor [REDACTED] who announced on the third day of class:  “SWEET THE FOOLS JUST GAVE ME TENURE.  CAN’T FIRE ME NOW, SO LEMME SHOW YOU HOW TO MAKE A FLAMETHROWER”

The thing she actually taught us was how to modify a culinary butane torch to empty the canister at a much higher rate than any manufacturer anywhere recommends, which gives you and AWESOME bigass jet of blue flame, but only lasts about 30 seconds per container.  She also showed us how to make bandeliers so we could carry multiple containers, “just in case”.

In more practical lessons, we were in class when the first gov’t shutdown happened, so we didn’t have money for models, so she oped to bring in various animals for us to draw instead.  there was the usual cats and dogs, but also chickens, horses, a farm hog, a 12-foot Burmese Python and a baby deer that had been abandoned on her porch.  It was really fun, both becuase animals are amazing, and becuase they don’t hold still, so you learn to draw REAL FAST, which is a skill that’s served me well since.

A few years later, I was summoned for Jury Duty, and had to show up at the courthouse for selection.  HOWEVER, I’d put my usual bag in the wash the previous night, so I grabbed my old school backpack to take with me because I knew I had a sketchbook in there to amuse myself with.

I forgot I also had my flamethrower in there.

I live in a pretty low-crime area, so the metal detectors are actually pretty far into the building- you don’t get scanned until you’re actually going into the courtroom.  So for about three hours beforehand, I was sitting in the hallway having a Nice Chat with one of the state park rangers and the CEO of the local call center.  We get called in, and as we walk through, my backpack sets off the alarm.

“Fuck.” I say abruptly remembering what would have set it off.

“Do you have anything metal in your backpack?” the security guy asks me.  I think he was expecting me to say glasses.

“I forgot that I have my flamethrower in here. I’ll just leave this outside.”  I explain, hoping I’m not about to be arrested.

“Please open your bag or leave it outs- your WHAT?”  Dude stops halfway through his routine.

“Flamethrower.  I made it in art class and will definitely be leaving it here.” I say, carefully putting my bag on the table, zipper open , and pointing at the small butane torch.  The guard looks at it, looks at me (pls note, I am small, white, feminine and conventionally attractive so YOU BET privilege was happening here), before deciding that Art People Are Dumb and waving me in after wanding me to make sure I hadn’t accidentally brought anything else in my pockets.

I was not selected for jury duty.

In other news, I still have it, and it still works.  I use it for mass-toasting creme brulee.

39 Hours

Summary: When the reader narrowly escapes a known serial killer, Detective Dean Winchester shows up to work the case before it goes cold. But can he catch the killer before he strikes again?…

Pairing: Detective!Dean x reader

Word Count: 12K

Warnings: language, kidnapping, violence, injury, mentions of murder

A/N: Gruff Detective Dean…oh how I’ve missed you…

Keep reading

Anything you can do, I can do better.

Originally posted by got7kings

[song inspiration: Flum ft. Tove Lo - Say it]

Info: im jaebum fuckboy!AU x oc fuckgirl!AU
genre: pure smut
word count: 4.3k
a/n: all your bias’ are gonna burn after this. ALL HAIL THE BIAS BURNER SIN JAEBUM! (possibility of a part two)

[New Message: Im Fuckboy]

What the fuck was he messaging me for? 

Im Jaebum, the biggest fuckboy around. He was just as big of a fuckboy as I was a fuckgirl, though. It’s not like we ever talked, unless we wanted to fuck one of the other’s friends. Other than that, we stayed out of each other’s way. There was no reason for us to associate. Period.

So, why is he texting me?

[11:14 pm] Im Fuckboy: What are you doin’?

[11:14 pm] Im Fuckboy: Hey!

[11:14 pm] Im Fuckboy: Lilith!

I rolled my eyes so damn hard it hurt my head.

[11:15 pm] Me: What do you want?

[11:15 pm] Im Fuckboy: You’re not at the party. Why?

[11:15 pm] Im Fuckboy: Fuck everybody here already?

[11:16 pm] Me: Ha! You’re one to talk

[11:16 pm] Me: You’ve fucked every single one of my friends

[11:17 pm] Me: Is that why you’re texting at a party? No one left to fuck either?

[11:17 pm] Im Fuckboy: You say it like you haven’t fucked all of mine too

[11:17 pm] Im Fuckboy: Which you have

[11:18 pm] Im Fuckboy: But, no that isn’t why. I just realized I’VE never fucked you

[11:18 pm] Im Fuckboy: And I want to

Keep reading

Hawaii part 2

Warning: Language and Smut Like A lottttt of smut haha


After three hours Harry finally returned back to the hotel room.

“Sorry babe, I had to confirm some things for tour, didn’t think it would take so long.” Harry said said stripping down to his boxers. With a grin he made his way over right beside me on the bed.

“Now where were we?” He asked nibbling at my neck.

It took everything within me not to react. If my plan was going to work, then I had to act uninterested. So I just sat there watching the TV.

“Was’ the matter with you?” He says nudging my cheek with his nose.

“Jus’ not in the mood.” I say grabbing my phone off the bedside table. I need something to distract me.

“But you were in the mood earlier.” Harry says leaning up to look me in the eyes.

“Yeah, three hours ago.” I say turning my attention back to my phone.

That was several hours ago and Harry hasn’t stopped trying since.

When we were at the beach he said,

“Wouldn’ it be nice to have sex on the beach?” But I kept my nose in my book and ignored the comment.

As the day wears on I can tell he’s getting more and more sexually frustrated. So many times I about gave in because how can you not? But I’ve held up.

We’re sitting at dinner and he can’t keep his eyes off me.

“My eyes are up here babe.” I say with a light chuckle before I take a sip of my water.

His eyes are wild and his leg has been bouncing up and down.

“Look, I’m fuckin’ sorry okay? But your drivin me mad. Especially when you wear stuff like that.” He says darkly, eyes darting to my low cut dress and then back up to my eyes.

I swallow the lump that formed in my throat. Stay cool Y/N. Tonight your in charge.

I regain my composure and confidence. A smirk forms on my face as I twirl my straw around in my cup. Suddenly I stand up and move my chair right next to him. Harry’s eyes go wide for a split second before he takes a deep breath.

I cross my right leg over my left and lean in towards him. My hand goes to the back of his head and lightly twirl his hair between my fingers. His eyes fall shut and his breath quickens.

Thank God this is a private dinner. I lean in so close my lips are almost touching his ear.

“Tonight I’m in charge. I’m gonna get up and go to our room. Meet me their in 10 minutes, no sooner, no later. Now don’t say anything just nod your head.”

Harry looked at me with bewildered eyes. I knew he’d be shocked since he’s always been the one in charge. I’m surprised at myself.

I raise my eyebrows in a questioning way. After a few seconds Harry snapped out of his daze and quickly shook his head yes.

A smile grew on my lips. With that I left and walked to our room.

I walked as fast I my legs could take me. Smiling at the people I past hoping no one would want to stop and talk. Thankfully no one did. When I finally got to the room I looked and realized I only had 5 minutes before Harry left the restaurant. I ran to my suit case and took out a matching black lingerie set. It was simple yet sexy. I’ve had all day to think about this moment, and now that it’s here I can barely contain myself.

I look in the mirror and make sure everything looks good. Once I’m satisfied with my appearance I sit on the edge of the bed waiting for Harry to get here. Not even 30 seconds after I sat down, I hear the door unlock and foot steps head towards me.

In walks a flustered grinning Harry. He looks so sexy with his hair all disheveled and his white button up that’s not really buttoned at all. It takes everything within me not to pounce on him.

“Someones been making dadd-” Harry starts to say but I stand up and interrupt him by putting my finger up to his lips.

“No Harry, I’m in charge tonight. The rules are simple. Only speak if I ask a question or tell you to. Do as I say. Only I can touch you and you can only touch me if you tell you. Understood?” I say pulling Harry close to my body to where are faces are almost touching.

I can hear his breath quicken.

“Yes.” He says sounding out of breath.

“So daddy thinks leaving me all hot and bothered for hours is okay? Hmm? Have me lying on the bed soaking for you and you’d rather talk on the phone? Tsk tsk.” I say ask I unbuttoning his shirt and slide it off his shoulders. My fingers trace over his chest. I bring my mouth down to his right nipple and lightly lick. He lets out a soft moan.

I walk around behind him and light scratch my nails up and down his back softly before leaving wet open mouthed kisses to his shoulder blades.

“You think you can just have me when ever you want. But not tonight.” I say turning him around to face me. My hands fall down to his belt and I quickly unbuckle it, sliding his jeans down so he could step out of them.

He’s wearing my favorite boxers. Red Calvin Klein’s. I quickly bit my lip at not only the sight of the boxers but his already fully erect man hood. He probably thinks I’m just gonna get on my knees and give him head like usual, but not this time.

I walk over to the dresser and pull out three scarfs. Harry has a confused look on his face.

“Lye on your back in the middle of the bed.” I say running the fabric through my hands. Harry wastes no time and is there in seconds. I smile at my eager baby.

I walk over to the bed and place the scarfs on the bedside table. I straddle Harry’s stomach careful not to touch his manhood yet. I lean down and kiss him on the lips. His tongue immediately slips in my mouth and I allow it. Suddenly his hands fly up to my waste and tries to push me towards his waste. I quickly sit up and push his hand down.

“Harry, no touching. If you touch me again without permission I’ll have to punish you more than I already am going to.”

He lets out a sigh but shakes his head in agreement.

I reach over and grab a scarf from the table. Lightly I drag the end across his chest and nipples. He bites his lip trying not to say anything.

“Put your hands above your head baby.” I say.

Quickly he complies knowing exactly what I have in mind. I take both wrists and tie them securely to the head board. Tugging a few times to make sure they were tight enough to hold him but not too tight to hurt.

I started kissing down his body, nibbling and sucking at random spots along the way. Harry’s heavy breathing and soft moans were making my panties soak. I kissed and love on his slightly pudgy hips probably leaving a few love bites.

I slowly pull down his boxers and his member immediately springs up hitting his stomach. Harry throws his head back onto the pillow panting hard. He’s never been one who could take a lot of foreplay. Harry’s a very sensitive boy.

I kiss my way back up his body making him give out a frustrated sigh.

“Speak Harry.” I say quietly next to his ear.

“I’m so fuckin’ hard I’m throbbing baby. Bloody hell please do something. Anything.” He says in a desperate shaky voice.

“Aw my babies being such a good boy for me. But I’m not sure you’vd learned your lesson yet.” I say kissing right next to his manhood causing him to twitch.

“Fuck fuck fuck, Y/N I swear I learned my lesson, I won’t do it again I’m sorry please I’m begging here.” He says pulling at his wrists trying to get free.

I reach across his body and grab the two other scarfs. Getting up from the bed I spread his legs apart and tie both of them to the two bedposts.

“Please it hurts Y/N.” Harry half cries out.

I straddle him again but hover my crotch above his. I lean down close to his ear again.

“Don’t worry baby I’ll make you feel so good you’ll be begging me to stop.” I mumble and bite his ear lobe. He lets out a moan and throws his hips up trying to get any kind of release. But I’m to fast and move my hips up just in time. Harry lets out a desperate cry. My panties are completely soaked so I decide to give in.

I make my way down his body and hover right over his manhood. I look up and Harry is intensely watching me with his bottom lip between his teeth.

Without breaking eye contact I lick from the base of his cock to the tip. He lets out a throaty groan and lets his head drop back. I take my hand and wrap it around him picking him up. Quickly I stick my mouth on the tip and start bobbing up and down taking as much as I can in my mouth. Harry’s a moaning mess.

“Atta girl. Mmm feels so fuckin good lil one. Don’t quit.” He says between moans. I just quicken my pace. My free hand goes down to his balls lightly massaging them. That makes him go crazy.

“Ohh I’m almost there don’t stop I’m so close.” He said after a few moments.

Not even 10 seconds later I felt him twitch inside my mouth. Cum was coming out like crazy but I swallowed and kept going. Even when he stopped cumming I kept going.

“Y/N I’m too sensitive baby.” He croaked out. But I kept going. I pulled my mouth off but my hand took its place.

“Come on baby give me one more. You can do it.” I said between kisses on his thigh. Harry’s whole body was twitching and shaking.

“Im Im so-” He said but stopped and threw his head back onto the pillow.

“Come on love your almost there. Give it to me. Cum all over me Harry.” I said and then began sucking on his tip.

When I felt his cock twitch I pulled my mouth back but kept my hand pumping him.

He let out a loud yelling that I’m sure the neighbors heard. Cum shot everywhere. All the ways up to his chest and stomach. I pulled my hand away and smiled at the sweaty boy above me.

“That’s my boy.” I said kissing his thighs and made my way up his stomach and chest licking up the cum.

When I got up to Harry’s face, his eyes were closed and he was still breathing kinda heavy. I lovingly kissed his cheeks, forehead, nose, everywhere. Finally he opened his eyes and gave me a lazy grin.

“That was amazing.” He said with droopy eyes.

“Well I’m glad you liked it, but I still need to get off.” I say with a smirk.

“Baby I don’t think I’ll be getting hard any time soon.” He said looking genuinely sorry.

“Don’t worry I have another Idea.” I say with a smirk and I quickly untie him.

“Sit up against the headboard for me baby.” I say still smirking.

He looks slightly confused but does as I say.

When I take off my bra and underwear and straddle his right thigh, he immediately knows what I have on mind and smiles.


Hey guys here’s part 2!! Hope you enjoyed! I’m not sure I’ll do a part 3 but if y’all want it, just let me know!! Also I take requests! OR if you just wanna talk about Harry, message me!!

an incomplete list of really annoying adhd symptoms

- Losing your phone and/or keys at least once a day, usually multiple times. (Especially my phone. If my phone is not in my hand I probably have no idea where it is.)  

- Looking like an asshole 24/7 even though you’re actually a really considerate person at heart because you constantly forget to reply to texts and messages, RSVP to events, tip waiters, etc. It took me about two weeks to realize I hadn’t yet donated to my friend’s Kickstarter. 

- Driving is just. You know. Fun. 

- Completely forgetting what you were going to say in the middle of probably 30% of your sentences. 

- Constantly burning food, leaving detergent on too long, etc. because you step out of the room for two seconds and end up distracted by something else.

- Fighting back tears when you need to clean a space but there are too many Items and u need to move them all and sort them out….somehow…kill me

- Needing clean, clear spaces in your home in order to think straight, but everything is constantly a mess because executive dysfunction. 

- That persistent feeling, even when you’re calm and feeling mostly fine, that you’ve probably forgotten something of dire importance and your life is about to come crashing down around you. 

- Getting super flustered when someone gives you instructions to follow that aren’t written down. 

- Being actually really fucking smart but having nothing to show for it because you struggle to follow instructions, remember key components of simple tasks, and you get confused by half of what people say to you.

- Being really hardworking and taking your work really seriously but getting no credit for it because you can’t perform half as well as employees who care half as much.

- Not understanding jokes. Not understanding jokes. Not understanding jokes.  N o t  u n d e r s t a n d i n g  j o k e s   

- Thought of a good song lyric, melody, or description? You better write that shit down NOW because it’s gonna be gone in 20 seconds. 

- Not knowing how to respond to various things people say so you just end up saying the most accidentally rude or awkward thing you possibly could. 

- Literally not even being able to focus on things that you love to do. Having to structure time to do things that are fulfilling to you. *bangs head against wall repeatedly*

- Checking and re-checking any work you do because who the hell knows what glaringly obvious idiotic mistake you might have made.

- Realizing that absolutely everything you know how to do halfway competently is a combination of Google and winging it because your brain just does not process information the way it’s normally presented and “common sense” is not a thing with you. 

- Having to set an unsettling amount of alarms on your phone if you actually want to remember the things you need to do. 

- Pretty much never making any recipe that involves more than 4 ingredients because anything past that gets overwhelming. 

- Making to-do lists and forgetting you made them. 

Yuzuru Hanyu’s Interview from Ice Jewels vol. 6

“I think the best thing about this season is that I was able to persevere until the end.”

Please do not use my translations without my permission. Scans can be found here.

Reflecting on this season

Q: Reflecting back on this season, what kind of season did you think it was?

Y: Let’s see… It was a season that started with injury, and I couldn’t do anything for two months. I competed many times, and World Team Trophy - the last competition of the season - didn’t go well, but I think I was able to complete the free skate in the end. Even after everything, I do feel that I did my best.

Q: Regarding the short program, are there any parts that you want to perfect?

Y: There are. This applies last year’s Ballade no. 1 as well, but when I’m not able to skate a clean program, the “image of perfection” just doesn’t appear in competitions even though I’m doing it in practice.

Keep reading


“I met Chloe on March 25th, 2017. It was at the HVFF in Chicago. I arrived three days before the event to have some time to explore the city on my own. When the day came I was a complete mess. I flew almost 3000 just to see her. Of course I was first in line that day.

She was a little bit late, which gave me plenty of time to get more nervous. We were expecting her to come through the black curtains. I was just talking with the staff guys (they were so nice to me) when they saw her coming behind us.

I really can’t describe how it felt to see her. She walked right pass me and suddenly I didn’t want to go first. She came with her manager and sat down and I still wouldn’t move. She was like waiting and I didn’t move. She finally told me to come over. I literally had a speech planned and all the things that I wanted to say. I brought some presents, but when I was in front of her I went totally blank.

I think I forgot my English in that moment. I managed to say some words. I introduced myself and said that I had come from Colombia and she was really surprised that I had done that. It’s true that when you’re with her she’s hyper focused on you. She grabs your hand and she looks at you, and only you and pays attention to every single thing that you say and when you’re an incoherent mess (like I was) she starts complimenting you. She grabbed my hair and said that she loved it, because she missed her long hair so much. She said that she loved my shirt (I was wearing the fight like a girl sweater) She always tries to keep the conversation flowing. One thing that struck me is that she seems to be very aware of the kind of person that is in front of her? I mean, I noticed that a few people only approached her booth to see if she was taking pictures. She had a no photos rule. I think with that she makes sure that people go there to have a special moment, not just to take selfies with some celebrity.

I think she knows how to read that love and reciprocate it when she sees that people are being honest with her. So many of us went up there so excited only to say hello, to spend some time with her. She tries to make that small moment special. I told her I had totally forgotten my English in that moment and she said that Natalia would love me, and mentioned the episode were they recruited Yoyo in Bogotá. I was mostly trying to get out all the things that I wanted to tell her, I was so nervous, but she never stopped holding my hand. She would hug me and she would thank for every nice thing that I had to say.

I forgot that I had to get her autograph so she asked if I had something for her to sign. I remembered the Daisy pop and the gifts and I got the box out of my backpack. She asked which color I wanted for the autograph and she started writing my name while I tried to find the gifts, and I couldn’t find them! I was taking so long and getting even more nervous so she got curious and started looking inside my bag. She found another pop and asked who that was. It was a gift for a friend. She had like her face in my bag and I was so clumsy trying to get the candy out of the bag. (I gave her candy from Colombia) I explained some things about it and she said that she loves treats and candy and everything sweet in general… yeah. No surprise there.

I think she was smiling at how clumsy I was the whole time. As I said, I think she really appreciates when people cares about her. I told her that I was going to come back and also see her at the photo ops and then she offered another hug and then went around the table to hug me…and she just hugs you like she means it. I mean, I know that I’m just another fan but I think she has a very special love for us and she shows it every second. In that moment she makes sure to make you feel special. She kept smiling and grabbed my hand again. I was shaking. I forgot half of the gifts, but I was incredibly happy.

Then it was the first photo op. I was like third in line. When I went in she hugged me again, called me by my name, and I was a bit more confident at that point. The photo ops are super fast and Chloe asked if I wanted a hug. I really never asked for anything because I didn’t know the rules for these things but she was always warm and nice. I mean, she doesn’t have to be like that and I think it can be exhausting for her but again, I think she tries to reciprocate the love that we show her in those brief seconds or minutes.

I got my picture and then I felt like I didn’t want to go… so I just waited until she was back in her booth and went to get the picture signed. I gave her a little bracelet and she let me put it on her wrist. I babbled some more about how much Daisy and her mean in my life. I thanked her. She hugged me again. I really lost the count on the hugs hahaha. I asked about her kids and she told me they were back at home. I said that I would see her the next day and then said goodbye.

On Sunday things were even better. I actually felt like I could talk to her like a normal person hahaha. I went back to her booth, of course (I really just spent my time there) Then I was first in line again. That day Chloe arrived around 11. When she came I started feeling a bit weird, I didn’t know if it was okay to go in so many times… but I really went to Chicago for her, so I had to make the most of it.

She sat down and said hello. I was wearing overalls and she said that she loved them. I told her that I knew, that I always wanted to try but she gave me the confidence to start buying them. She hugged me again and asked if I was going to the panel. I said of course. I told her that I had another photo op with her and she told me that she would see me there.

I kinda started feeling the withdrawals at that point… so I just lurked around her booth for the rest of the morning until it was time for the photo op (it was a duo op with Brett) that day things were a lot more organized. I was one of the last ones in line. For that photo I had a pose in mind.

It was as fast as the other one. I think when it was my turn I went straight for Chloe and forgot that Brett was there for a second haha so I quickly turned to say hi to him but never let go off Chloe hahaha. The photographer would always get annoyed… and even more when I tried to explain the pose to Chloe and Brett but they just wouldn’t get it. It was funny because they got it wrong in the exact same way the first time. Chloe kept asking and trying to show me if she was getting it, and the next thing I know her leg is like around me, and then Brett got it and I started laughing and almost ruined the photo… I’m still not totally happy with my face, but at least we had a good time for those… 30 seconds hahaha. I said thank you and apologized. Chloe said that we almost didn’t get it… and then I started to feel like I didn’t want to say goodbye. I hugged her and then left because I took too long and the ops guys hated me already. On my way out I was like… shit Brett! And then hugged Brett. I think they both were laughing the whole time about my clumsiness. So that was a bit of a mess but a good kind of mess.

But then I picked my photo… I didn’t turn out that bad, and I realized that I had to do something else. I mean, I was already there. So I ran back to the table and got the last ticket for the next op. I ended back in line. The last person for the Chloe solo op. I’m so glad I went back. When I entered again I asked if she was getting tired of me. She received me with open arms and said that she never would. She peeked outside and when she realized that I was the last person she told me “best for last!” and grabbed my hand to take me to the center of the booth. She asked if I had anything in mind so I just told her to make faces. When they took the pic she quickly told me that she would say that she messed up, and then told the photographer that she had messed up and to take another one. So they took another picture, and I made the same face like the idiot I am. The thing is… every time she would do something nice my brain would stop working so I had nothing in that moment. I kinda wanted to cry.

So that’s exactly what I did. I didn’t know if that was going to be my last personal moment with her so I started thanking her for everything, again. I told her that I was glad I took the very irresponsible decision to fly to Chicago in the last minute. She thanked me for doing it and yes… more hugs. I got some time while the next celeb took Chloe’s place in the booth so I told her that I wanted to say goodbye and she told me to go to her autograph table again. I told her that she was my hero. I felt like a guy was about to take me out so I gave her one last hug and left.

Next it was the panel. You all know how that went. It was hilarious. I was really close to them but then went back to be closer to the mic line. I did get to ask a question about Daisy. At that point we didn’t know if the show was going to be renewed and I also started thinking that maybe this was going to be the only time that I got to see her. I was happy with the things I told her. I was happy to see with my own eyes how nice and honest in the way she interacts with people that she is, but it was heartbreaking to think that only had like a few minutes more to see her.

So yes. I went back one last time to the autograph table… Actually I waited for HOURS to be the last one to go. Since I had become such good friends with the staff they just let me be there. At the end I got to hang on the table where they had the pile of photos for Chloe to sign, right next to her table. That’s when the funniest thing happened. I see a huge, Asian guy come out from the back, He came to the table where I was and started looking through the photos. So I went like…”Mr Bennet?” He said yes with a smile. I introduced myself and told him my name and when he heard it (and probably my accent) he said that I was the girl that came from Colombia, that Chloe had told him about me. I died in that moment… for the tenth time in two days. It was almost my turn so I just told him that he had the most amazing daughter in the world. That she’s important for so many people and women, that she was amazing and for me it was worth it to take such a trip just to tell her that. He went full proud dad mode in that second and told me that she really was, and just the way she was here with her fans she was at home. He told me that she really appreciated me being there, and all the people that support her. He thanked me and said that she probably would have something special to say to me.

I went back. I really don’t know what was going through her manager’s head at that point, but Chloe looked happy. I went like: “I just met your dad” She was like oh no, what did he say? He’s talking to the fans now? I just told her that we just agreed that she’s the best. She took one of the other pictures that I was carrying to sign it while we spoke. I thanked her for everything she did. I told her that it meant a lot. I really don’t remember how we got to her birthday, but I wished her a happy birthday and told her that mine was coming up too. She wished me a happy birthday. I was trying really hard not to cry in front of her, but I told her that I really meant all the things that I had told her, and that it might seem like just a tv show, or a fictional character… but it really makes a difference in the lives of so many people. She knows, she works her ass off to brig Daisy to us and she loves every second of it. She thanked me and hugged me and she wouldn’t let go off my hand while I told her.

Then she eyed my iphone on the table. She asked if I wanted a selfie. I turned to check if there were people in line and actually some people arrived after me so I just looked back at her, but she was grabbing my phone and she told the others that it was because my photo op came out wrong. She told me that I had come all the way here, that I should get one. I just nodded and she was already going though my phone and opening the camera app. She took a pic, and then I said that my hair was terrible, so she just took another one. She didn’t look like uncomfortable or like she had to do it. She really wanted to make that moment special. I think she wants that for all her fans and I think that it’s important not to pressure her to sign things and take pictures on do things. She’s a person just like us, she could be tired or having a bad day, but she’ll offer something special to make you happy if she can. She wouldn’t stop thanking me and I told her that I was happy that I got to see her one last time. Then I saw her manager check her watch and I think I said it out loud because Chloe laughed. She got out of the table again to hug me and that’s when I broke. I told her that I didn’t know if I would get to see her again, but that she had made everything so special that I would always treasure these days. She told me that we would see each other again and I told her that we didn’t even know what was going to happen with AoS and that I just needed Daisy in my life. I told her that it would kill me (Don’t judge me. I was a mess in that moment) she was like noo! Don’t die! Hahaha She said that she was going to do new things.

In the end she just hugged me and thanked me for coming. I waited until she left and waved her goodbye. I actually didn’t cry when she left hahah I think maybe I’ll get to see her again. Now I know that going there was totally worth it and I would definitely do it again.”

I Only Want To Say...  -Jesus, “Gethsemane”, from Jesus Christ Superstar

I had the opportunity of a lifetime to meet Sam and Caitriona in NYC on September 30th. They are absolutely luminous in person - both physically and, I don’t want to sound like a hippie or anything, but spiritually.  They just glow with beauty from the inside.

But I almost didn’t get there.  The weekend before, the weekend of the first ever MPC Gathering (September 22nd-24th),  which should have been a joyous meeting of people from all over the world, was filled with anxiety and in some cases, downright fear for me.  Two things were happening simultaneously that weekend:  I was being stalked by a fellow peaker, with all my actions being reported to arguably the biggest troll in the fandom. And because of lies spread by that same troll and others of his ilk, the organizers of the NYC event were threatening to take away my ticket because other people on the guest list/the organizers believed the lies that were told about me and complained about my presence.     

These lies have been told about me for years; lies, given their source and vehement repetition, have become accepted as truth over time. I can’t prove a negative. I can only say who I am and what I have done.


The first issue - stalking - I was followed to a dinner, information that was only available to fellow peakers in a private group, information that was shared on public social media.  I was watched at all the MPC events and my “behavior” and whereabouts again were reported.  Sharing of information from the private MPC Facebook group is against the rules and grounds for immediate removal.

One of my posts from the private, official MPC Facebook group was screen capped and shared - again a violation of trust as a peaker and very much against the rules.  This post was used to spread lies about me allegedly deleting things because I was “afraid I’d let too much information out” or something of the like. 

I have emailed the information about the stalking and sharing of information from MPC to Jordana Brown and Alex Norouzi with no response.  I have also contacted them in private message.  I sent a group message this morning; only John Valbonesie replied.  Jordana has re-posted the Facebook rules, adding verbiage about bullying, but as of the time of her post, both Caroline Spencer and Melanie Leopold were still members of the group.

I also contacted the police about the stalking, as well as my lawyer.  For now, we are holding the information and waiting. 


The post that was shared from the private MPC Facebook group referred to a visit I made to Edinburgh which included a paper making class.  I booked my class through her public website.  I know other fans who have done just what I did, have bought works from her or commissioned pieces.  I paid and learned about/made paper.  We never talked about Sam or Outlander.  Why?  Because it wasn’t appropriate or relevant to what we were doing.  

I had a delightful afternoon with another lady, learning about and making some beautiful paper.  As an artist, I was fascinated to learn a new expressive form, especially visual.  I will treasure those pieces beyond any souvenir I’ve ever bought because I made them with my own hands. 

N.B. - it is GlasGow not Glascow, cattle being few and far between in the city

In the Tumblr post above - which includes my post from the MPC Facebook page (my words, my post, my property, so I’m not breaking rules by sharing it)  - multiple references are made as to why I would be in Edinburgh.  I have gone to the capital several times each time I’ve been to Scotland, it’s a beautiful city, with so much history and so many things to see.  Bloodwise Scotland is there (not in GlasGow).  Ailsa Aitkenhead, my collaborative pianist for my concert, teaches at the university and so we rehearsed there. Additionally, I don’t think I need to justify where I go on holiday to anyone nor do I need to confine myself to one city.


I can’t recall all the lies that have been told about me over the years.  Obviously I was accused of stalking Sam and his mother on my recent trip.  More recently I’ve been accused of having a Tumblr dedicated solely to posting daily hate directed towards Sam and Caitriona.  This lie was so ingrained in the fandom that I had to talk to Bloodwise on the phone to clear the air, lest they pull all support of my fundraisers (they are still hesitant to support me on twitter because of a certain, well-known, blue check troll)  

This (flutefantasy) is my only Tumblr account; as you can see, it’s not very active.  

But for a moment, let’s talk about the things I have NOT done

N’er have I e’er

  • Followed Sam in an airport taking pictures of his ass while he shopped for magazines   
  • Stood over him on a plane while he sleeps   
  • Almost drowned at Blackness Castle trying to see him filming   
  • Got hurt at Dunure Harbor trying to see him filming   
  • Climbed trees 10 feet above the wall at Dysart Harbor, which in turn is 30 feet above the water, to take pics of filming  (and I was in Scotland during the filming of those scenes)    
  • Grabbed Sam’s ass, kissed him on the lips, had him sign a body part or gotten a tattoo of his name or image    
  • Threatened to punch Sam or otherwise cause him bodily injury because I thought he wasn’t paying enough attention to me 
  • Hung out (for hours/days) where he supposedly lives and is known to shop, eat, etc, in the hopes of seeing him (this happened as recently as September 2017 even though Sam wasn’t in Scotland)

In 2015 I happened on the filming at Deanston Distillery.  I was on a tour with my friend Kristina, led by Steve McLeish of Outlandish Journeys.  We had just left Doune Castle and saw the filming signs. We followed them to the village.   I saw the drivers and gave them gifts I had for them and the cast. The cast were busy filming.   I was the only fan there. I could have had exclusive access. Did I wait for hours for them to finish? No. Because I was on a custom tour and wasn’t going to waste hundreds of dollars or time in Scotland sitting around and possibly not even get to see them.  Feel free to contact Steve on twitter and confirm this.


You make up lies about me left right and center. You pass them off as scripture and people believe them, to my detriment. You know you are lying.

I have donated, done concerts (at my own expense) tweeted about and taken part in fundraisers for all Sam and Caitriona’s charities. I tweet weekly love for Sam and Cait. I fully support them, their careers and their charities. I believe their personal lives are their business, not ours. 

I don’t engage with trolls and haters. I post and interact with my friends.  I mind my own business.  You seek me out to bully and harass me.  I have most of you blocked.  Yet my social media is screen capped and I seem to be a constant topic of conversation.  My social media is all positivity, humor, animals, Outlander and some politics. What does your social media look like? Hate and ridicule and lies 

 NOTE - All of these tweets/accounts, and more besides going back years have been reported over and over again by me and others, to no avail.  

Have I done/said things I regret?  In this fandom or in life in general?  Yes.  Anyone who says otherwise is a liar or living in a fantasy.  I’ve made amends where I can and live with the things I can’t.  

In line at the NYC event, I was next to a couple of ladies.  We talked for about 30 minutes waiting to get in.  At one point, one of the ladies said “I hear one of those nasty shippers is here tonight. I won’t say names but she plays the flute”.  I thought for a second if I should say anything or let it be.  I looked her in the eyes and said that was me.  She didn’t believe it.  It took a few minutes of convincing because she was sure the “flute shipper” was a crazy person and I was so nice and normal.  Then she said she had met other people in the fandom who had “reputations” and they were also nice and normal and not at all like what social media portrays them to be.  I found this to be such a relief.  

The only sour note (sorry for the pun) was that she left me with this comment, and I’m paraphrasing because I don’t remember her exact words “well just behave so that I can tell others you aren’t what they say”.  (I later learned that she attacked me on twitter the following week.  I was told this by others, as it turns out she has me blocked.)  

Behave? Am I recalcitrant toddler? Do I or any other member of this fandom need to have my actions monitored for appropriateness?  

That right there I think is one of the issues in this fandom.  If you don’t “behave” according to what one group thinks is acceptable, then you are crazy, delusional, awful, stalker, etc.  Sadly I got a lot of dirty looks throughout the night in NYC.  The organizers made sure that I was ok and happy.  I am grateful to them for that.  But I wonder if Caitriona and Sam know the true depths of pettiness and hatred they were in the midst of that Saturday night.  Do you realize that the things you accuse me of are not only things I haven’t done but are actually true of you? 


Jordana has finally responded to me tonight - after I made a public post in the MPC Facebook group.  She refuses to enforce her own rules and remove the two people who shared my information in a willful and malicious act, not an accidental or innocent share.  She states she will talk to one of the two of them but that is all.  I have to wonder if Shatner has some influence here. 

When managers lie about working with your schedule

I VERY briefly worked at a shoe store while in college since I needed a second job to make ends meet. The manager who hired me promised to work around my schedule and to not put me down for more than 20hr a week. My first weekend (thurs-sun, actually) I worked 30 hours. 30 HOURS. Then, I saw I was scheduled during times I had class. I brought this up, as they did have my availability, and they took me off the first couple conflicts and then the manager asked in a snooty voice if it wasn’t too much to ask to “skip a couple classes here and there” because “it probably isn’t that big a deal and this is my job.”
I finished my shift and the next morning, I called just as the store opened to quit. Because fuck that shit, I ain’t working 2 jobs to pay for classes I’m missing.

Help Me Get The Girl Part 2 (Grayson Mini-Series)

Description: Grayson seeks out your help to get your friend to fall for him.  In exchange for your help, Grayson promises to take care of your freshman brother when it comes to being bullied.  What you two didn’t know is that even though helping each other would ideally be beneficial, there would be a series of events that would make you two question whether this was a good deal or a disaster in the making.

Word Count: 2156

Warnings: Language. Mentions of sex.

 A/N: I’m posting this a little later than planned, I was at a friend’s place.  I wanted to clarify that in this series Grayson and Ethan are not youtube stars.  They are teenage boys in high school who do typical teenage boy things.   Anyway, I hope you like part two and if you haven’t, check out part 1 which I will link at the bottom!

You’re POV:

            It was day one of helping Grayson ‘Get the girl’.  I have to admit, I felt somewhat guilty for doing this behind Grace’s back, but I had to make sure my brother was going to be okay.  The thought of him being bullied made me sick and even though on the outside he seemed okay, I can tell by the look in his eyes that he’s really not.

            It was Friday and Grayson suggested that we get started immediately because “the longer we wait, the more she slips away”.  This whole situation was almost making him as dramatic as Ethan is on a daily basis.  He even set a time for us to meet to lay out our plan.  As annoying as it was, I had to hold up my end of the deal or else I’d never hear the end of it.

            I was broken away from my thoughts when a car horn blared around me.  I looked at the clock reading that it was 4:30; Grayson was here.  I walked down the stairs, my eyes seeing Theo heading toward the kitchen.  He was going to be alone by himself for a little bit and I didn’t want him to think that I was ditching our movie night.

            “Hey, Theo,” I caught his attention.

            “Huh.” He paused, poking his head back out through the kitchen door.

            “I’m going to E and Gray’s place for a bit, but I’ll be back by 7 for our movie night.”

            He sighed, running his hand through his hair, “No you won’t.  Each time you go over there, Ethan convinces you to stay longer, you come back late, and you fall asleep 20 minutes into the movie.”

            My left eyebrow lifted up as I thought about it.  He wasn’t wrong.  Ethan usually ended up planting a seed in my brain that would eventually grow and convince me that one of his reckless ideas was a good one.  For example, one time I went over to pick up my biology book that I had left in his room and I ended up hanging upside down from a tree while both E and Gray threw grapes in my mouth.  My legs got tired from being wrapped around the branch and were too weak to hold on anymore which resulted in me falling flat on my face, leaving a scar above my right brow.

           “I’m not going to hang out with Ethan,” I explained. “I’m going to help Gray with something so I won’t be long.”

           He rolled his eyes, sarcastically replying, “Okay.” Dragging out the word longer than necessary, he proceeded to make his way into the kitchen and I went outside to meet Grayson.

           Right when I exited the house I could hear him yelling at me to hurry up.  It was obvious to me that he was anxious to get started, but 2 hours of planning wasn’t going to win Grace over the next day.  As soon as I closed the passenger side door, Gray was talking my ear off about ideas he had and what I could say to her to make her more interested.  This rambling consisted of me mumbling, “mhmm,” “alright” and “maybe”.  It also lasted the entire drive to their house.

           I didn’t get the chance to open my door and gather my things before Grayson ripped the door open himself, grabbed my arm, and dragged me inside.  Excitement is a strong emotion, I understand this, but the way he was reacting was a bit over the top.  It wasn’t worth pointing out.  If he was happy, I was going to let him be happy.

           He pulled me through the front door, drug me up the stairs, and once we made it to his room—he shoved me into his desk chair and plopped himself on the end of his bed.  In the process my jaw had dropped open, hair had fallen in my face, and eyes widened to the size of baseballs.  Someone was super eager; that someone wasn’t me.

           Grayson clapped his hands together, “So… where do we start?”

           Shock took over my face then transformed into a look of frustration.  I held up my index finger, “First, we start with you never pulling me around like a rag doll ever again.” I added another finger to my count, “Second, calm down! Your acting like a child on Halloween.”

           “Sorry.” He sighed. “I just, I’ve wanted her to like me for the past year, but apparently I’ve been getting it wrong.  Or else maybe I’m just not good enough.”

           I stood up, walked over and joined him on his bed.  I bumped my shoulder against his, “You’ll always be good enough, Gray.  But, that doesn’t mean that you and the one you want are going to end up together. Though, I promised I would help you get the girl and that’s what I’m going to do.” I scowled to myself.  That whole spiel was extremely hypocritical, but by the look on Grayson’s face, I don’t think he realized it.

           “So, let’s start with things that she likes.” I went to my bag and pulled out a notebook that I had packed.  “We can make a list, starting with the things you already know, then I can tell you a few more things.”

           He nodded with a smirk on his face.  It was clear to me that he was confident, but he had only known her for a year compared to my 7 years of friendship with her.  I handed over the notebook to him and his confidence started to fade.  He hesitantly took it from me and started to scribble a few things down.  It was only about 30 seconds before he was done and shoving it back into my hands.

           His list was as follows:

1.     Puppies

2.     Pillows

3.     The color gold

4.     Tacos

5.     Sloths

6.     Jewelry

7.     Painting

I closed my eyes, taking a moment to put all of my thoughts into order before tackling the list.

           “Grayson, is this list a joke?” I questioned in awe.

           “What do you mean?” he glanced over at the list he created.

           “Well, first of all she’s allergic to dogs.  She only sleeps with 1 pillow because more than one messes up her neck.  Her favorite color is purple, MY favorite color is gold.  Tacos are my favorite food.  She can’t even handle nacho cheese.  Her favorite animal is an elephant.”

           He stopped me, putting his hand up.  Fully prepared to argue he said, “Her favorite animal is a sloth.  She said it at lunch a couple weeks ago.  She said, ‘Sloths are hands down the best animal in the world.  Fight me on it.’.  So, yeah, she likes sloths.”

           “GRAYSON! That was me!  She thinks sloths are the ugliest things in the world, that’s why I said that.” I shook my head, palming myself.

           “No it wasn’t!”

           “Yes it was.”

           “No it wasn’t.”


           “ETHAN!” he screamed, causing me to cover up my ears. “ETHAN COME HERE!”

           It was only a few seconds before Ethan busted through the bedroom door, towel slung low on his hips.  He looked so irritated, his face pulled into a sneer.

           “What!” he threw one hand in the air, the other holding the towel up.

           “Grace’s favorite animal is a sloth, right?” he asked as if it was the dumbest question in the world.

           Ethan shook his head, “She hates sloths.  She thinks they’re ugly.”

           “Why did I not hear her say this?” Grayson huffs.

           “We talked about it at lunch a couple weeks ago because Y/N thinks that they’re the cutest animal in the world.” Ethan explains.  

           I stuck my tongue out at Grayson, “Told you.”

           Ethan takes a few steps closer, trying to get a good look at the notebook in my hands.  Immediately, Grayson snatches it up, pulling it tight against his chest.  He shifted himself so that he was facing away from Ethan, protecting it like it was a precious jewel.

           “What are you doing?  Why are you hiding that?” Ethan reached for it.

           Gray slapped his hand away, “Don’t touch the notebook!”  Ethan reached again, “I SAID DON’T TOUCH IT!”

           “We’re making a list of things that Grace likes.” I told him.


           “Because I’m helping Grayson get her to like him.”

           “To be my girlfriend.” Grayson corrected me.

           Ethan busted out in laughter, his arms wrapping around his stomach as he bent over.  I know the difference between Ethan’s fake laugh and his real laugh. This was a true, genuine laugh.  His laughing started to calm a bit but once he saw the look of pure rage on Gray’s face, he began to laugh again.

           “Ethan! Stop!” Grayson demanded, the authority in his voice wavering.

           Ethan struggled to keep his laughter down while he spoke, but managed to do it.  “Sorry, bro, but you’ve been at this for a year now.  I don’t think it’s going to start working now.”

           “It will work!” I stated.  “Don’t listen to him Grayson.  I mean look at your list, you got two of them right.  She likes jewelry and she loves to paint!  I can give you a few more things and we will be done with step 1!” I tried to keep a positive tone.

           “Okay.” E deadpanned.

           “Ethan get out of here and get some clothes on.” Grayson ordered.  “We have virgin eyes here!”

           Insulted by his statement the words spilled out of my mouth before I could stop them.  “I am NOT a virgin!”

           Silence fell over the room, Ethan curling his lips in to control his laughter yet again, and Grayson looking like a deer in headlights.  I mimicked Grayson’s facial expression, mentally kicking myself in the face for even saying those horrible words.

           “Y/N, you’re not a virgin?  I swear you were when we met you.  You spilled that can of beans the first night we all hung out.” Grayson reminded me.

           I shrugged, “Well, it has been a year so…”



           Grayson rolled his eyes, “Who did you lose your virginity to?”

           “Excuse me, that’s none of your business.”

           Grayson let out a small grumble, “Why can’t you tell me?”

           “Why do I need to tell you?”

           “Because we’re friends.”

           “You’re a dude.  I’m not telling you.”

           We continued back and forth until Grayson got quiet, pondering through the situation.  His eyes squinted in thought as he looked at me and then up to the sealing and then back to me.

           “Don’t tell me it was Jordan Kooser.  That douche bag that walks around like he owns the place. I hate him.  Is that why you won’t tell me?” he rambled.

           “No! Ew, no!  Oh my god, no!” I stuck my tongue out and shook my head.

           “Do I know him?”

           “Yes.” Ethan responded for me.

           “ETHAN KNOWS BUT I CAN’T!  This is bullshit.” He complained, his voice becoming low.

           “Why would you tell Ethan and not me?” his voice sounded so hurt.

           “I didn’t.” I stated the truth.

           “Then how would he know?” he said, his eyes drifting over to Ethan.

           For a moment he stared at Ethan, then he turned his attention back to me.  His eyes moved back and forth between the two of us for a solid minute before his face scrunched up into a ball of disgust.  He let out a horrified noise, becoming slack jawed with wide eyes.

           “Oh my god you and Ethan lost your virginity… TO EACH OTHER!”

           A smile of satisfaction spread across Ethan’s face while a look of pure embarrassment came across mine.  I hid my face in my hands because it was the truth.  I could feel the bed shift, knowing that Grayson had hopped up from the bed in horror.  Ethan, again, started to laugh at the whole situation while I was absolutely mortified.

           “Why!  When?” Gray screamed.

           Ethan explained for the both of us, “It was like 6 months ago.  We were hanging out while you were out with some friends.  Somehow we got on the topic of virginity and decided that if we were going to lose it to someone it might as well be our best friend so we just… did it.  It was what we wanted.  It was worth it too.” Ethan winked at me just to make me more uncomfortable.

           Sure, we slept with each other.  Yes, it was amazing. But I didn’t see Ethan as anything more than a friend and he felt the exact same way.   We made that very clear to each other.

           “Have you… like since…” Grayson’s voice trailed off.

           “Two more times.  But those were just to let out frustrations we had.  It’s been months since we last did it.” Ethan brushed it off like it was nothing.  “We called it off so it wouldn’t interfere with our friendship.”

           “That’s gross.” Grayson spat.

           “That’s life.” Ethan retorted.

           “And this is uncomfortable.” I finished.


Part 1

Roman Reigns - Take A Seat Babygirl

 Roman Reigns - Prompt’s #53 “Sit in my lap” and #25 “Shut up and kiss me”

Request for - @m-a-t-91

Warning - Implied Smut, Swearing

Word Count - 683 Words

Originally posted by r0manreigns

Home sweet home! There was nothing like it, especially after a month long tour with WWE touring all around europe. The past few days at home would’ve been miles better if your boyfriend of two years was there, but luckily for you your Samoan hunk was due home from the Asia tour in just a few hours - which is why you were currently running around yours and Romans giant share house like an absolute mad woman trying to clean up the mess you and Roman (mainly Roman) had left it in before you’d both left for tour. So that he could come home to a clean house and you two could cuddle up together and watch movies (hopefully your choice of disney.)

You were upstairs putting away the last few items of clothing from your suitcase from the tour when you heard the click of your front door and your boyfriend’s signature deep and unbelievably sexy voice echo through your shared home. A smile cracked onto you lips hearing his voice as you haphazardly shoved the final items into the wash basket, hurriedly making your way down the stairs to greet Roman. Over joyed at being able to see him and touch him for the first time in just over a month. 

As soon as you reached the bottom of the stairs your smile faltered a little, seeing the trail of mess Roman had already left behind him: Jackets, shoes, a hat, even a pair of beats and other miscellaneous items. This man was honestly a walking whirlwind; where ever he went there was mess! You walked to the living area and stood in the frame looking down at your boyfriend already sprawled out on the couch.

“Hey Babygirl” he smirked heaving his large frame from the couch and holding his arms open for you. You raised an eyebrow at him in a sense of displeasure and folded your arms, jutting your hip out slightly. He returned a one eyebrow raised look this time it adorned more confusion. “What’s up Babygirl” he questioned, his arms coming to rest at his sides as he sat back down on the couch.

“Roman! What do you mean what’s up! I’ve been up since 8 am cleaning this shit hole of a house, it’s now 1 pm and i haven’t sat down at all!” you shouted your voice becoming exasperated and your arms flailing around in the air accentuating your frustration at your overly messy boyfriend. The Samoan made a sorry face that was still somehow laced with his signature smirk.

“Come and sit down now Babygirl, the place looks spotless” he tried to reason with you, but you continued to babble on stating every tiny out of place item in your house. After about 30 seconds he stood up and roughly took your hand in his and gave you an almost - terrifying glare. Which immediately silenced your fusillade of words. “Babygirl i have told you once and I’m not gonna say it again, the place looks fucking spotless. Now that pretty little mouth need to close and that sexy ass needs to sit down. So how about you sit in my lap and then you shut up and kiss me” he smirked placing a passionate kiss on your lips before dragging you onto him to straddle his lap.

He kissed along your jaw and down your neck whilst holding your hips tightly onto his. Whilst you moaned knowing exactly what he had in mind.

“Actually, fuck the sitting down part” he grinned cheekily picking you up, you immediately wrapped your legs around his waist and threaded your dainty fingers through thick hair as he carried you to the bedroom. “You’re just about to learn why you can’t go shouting at The Guy like that Babygirl” he threw you down on the bed roughly before climbing onto your small frame and attacking your lips with a frenzy of kisses.

If you getting stressed at Roman as soon as he came off tour meant he treated you like this, maybe you should do it every time. 

A/N - So this ones a little smuttier than usual and also a little shorter, but i hope you like it and it was a great prompt to write for ~ Moxxii

Bad Reputation

Author: @dylan-trash-tbh

Pairing: Stiles x Reader

Words: 3,8k

Warnings: bad parent stuff.

A/N: my sweet Lele asked me two weeks ago if I could do a song inspired fic to Shawn Mendes - Bad Reputation and I said “of cooourse” I started it 3 times and deleted it every time. Plus : I never wanna listen to that song again. ❤️ @golddaggers iloveyou

Also: I’ve got a prompt request from @parislight - I really hope you like it :)


Originally posted by imaginesofeveryfandom

Stiles knew who Y/N was long before he actually got to know her. He saw the Y/H/C haired girl in the halls of Beacon Hills High, mostly walking alone. Her head held down to avoid eye contact with her fellow students. It was like most people new who she was but nobody was actually friends with her. Y/N kept to herself during the school days, the weekends whatsoever were a different story. You would meet her at every party, always happily dancing to the music, drinking and laughing. She was like a whole different person and Stiles always wondered what kind of girl she really was. But he never really had enough courage to approach her. The seventeen year old boy loved nothing more than to solve a mystery. What he didn’t know was, that she would become the biggest mystery he would ever try to solve.

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He Goes by the Name H. One [part 3]

Author: b0blegum

Pairing: DJ!Chae Hyungwon x Reader

Rating: 19+ (Kinda. Read at your own risk)(rape trigger)

Genre: Romance


Part: Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - end

Hyungwon’s POV

The DJ was playing ‘Matches’ and remixed it into his own liking. Making people dancing to the beat. The room was crowded, people had to shout a bit when they were talking or flirting or even just to say a simple hi.

I Was standing here. Leaning on the bar counter with one hand rested on it while the other holding up my glass of Whiskey. Ice cubes clinking onto the side as i swirled up the glass.

And she was there. Sitting on the couch, feeling uncomfortable judging by how her eyes wandered around the room. I kept watching her through the sidelines of people who were busily dancing, before i decided to came over to her.

“You’re alone?” I asked her as i sat next to her. She looked really pretty upclose and she’s really my type of girl…

…to fuck with.

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I grip and squeeze the night sky with aching fingers

And pull its translucent sheet down upon me

The weight of the night is heavy and bruising

But the stars unceremoniously fall and clatter upon the earth

And I am left holding nothing but undefined darkness in my hands

Ridge - Roadkill to shelf

WARNING !! This post contains photos and descriptions of dead animals, skinned animals, decomposition, maggots, and the general gory details involved with cleaning up bones.

I’ve gotten a couple asks about the methods I use to clean bones, so I thought I’d put together a quick summary of the journey of my female Badger, Ridge, from road to shelf. It’s not really a tutorial, but I have almost kind of written it like one - keep in mind this is just Ridge’s personal cleanup journey, and all the steps she went through while being processed (it’s pretty similar for all my roadkill though) It’s a bit garbled and I haven’t really clarified anything… Hm. Maybe I will put together a proper tutorial in the future. For now, this is Ridge~

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Here’s a short scene from “Starcrushed” that took me a ridiculous amount of time to storyboard. It’s always tough when you spend so much time on something and then get it in the animatic and it only amounts to about 30 seconds of footage. Hopefully it was worth the effort…

anonymous asked:

"You HAVE to give it to me for what the sticker says!" Bitch nah, you picked up a $29.99 item that was randomly put on a shelf by another idiot customer and you thought "Oh hey, this big item that's on display on the other side of the store totally goes with the $2 hairbrushes hanging around and behind it." If you want it, you give me 30 bucks or you leave. The word 'Food Processor' doesn't look like 'Hairbrush' it's right there on that sticker you're so obsessed about gtfo

I literally took out a pricing gun (back when we still used them.) and put $59.99 on a gallon of milk because they picked it up from the half gallon space and “you have to give it to me for the price marked. It’s the law” first off no it’s not a law. There is a law about deceptive price tactics which this is not as it clearly said half gallon on the sign. And second now if I use your logic you now have to pay me $60 because that’s “the law”.

Most stores will honor the incorrect price if we actually mis-labeled it as a customer service to keep people happy. But no dear fuckstick we are not required to give it to you even if I put a sticker of .99¢ on a 60" television. Use your brain people.