hello everyone! just a few days ago i reached 3k+ followers! wow! i can’t express enough how thankful i am for every single one of you… i wish i could make a better edit to show my gratitude (school takes up 99.9% of my time…rip) but i hope this will suffice! again thank you guys so much for the support and kindness you have shown me over the years! it truly means so much to me! below are my lovely mutuals + some very nice and talented users you should follow!!! please go show them some love! 🌙⭐️✨
This only took me forty years longer than I originally planned lmao
The anatomy bounces around a bit ‘cause I had to do so much reloading and editing of lines and colours I’d JUST fit for another outfit and hgsfsdfjk (also deleted/erased part of a layer along the way I forgot I needed for her skin for that ‘Tournament’ outfit, so I had to wing it off one of the other outfits ^^;)
Next time, I’ll make sure I sort it better. I think it turned out okay though! Let me know if this is too fast or whatever, because I’m no good at timing things lol
Imagine – Sam helping you through a depression episode
Word Count – 1,766
Pairing – Sam x Reader
Triggers – Depression, mentions of not eating
A/N – Going through this so wanted to write this to cheer me
up, hopefully it can cheer you up too.
These past few days have been shitty as hell. You’ve tried
to fought through this for years but it was getting worse. Hunting was getting
tiring, people dying cause of you every single day. Not sleeping cause your
mind wouldn’t let you and you needed to do research anyways. Your bags under
your eyes were so dark, makeup couldn’t even hide it and the boys took notice
to it very quickly.
Dean was always one of those people who hid things deep down
inside and would cover it up with anger, but sadly you weren’t like that. He’d
tell you “it’ll get better” and that’ll be it. Cas would just ask if you were
okay every few times, not taking anything to it. But there was someone who was
different than them when it came to this, a lot different.
Sam Winchester, the man who saved the world once but could barely
save himself. The man who can’t save himself, but he’ll try his damn hardest to
save you and his broken older brother. The man who’s been to hell and back, and
he’s still the most kind hearted person on this planet. Nothing could bring him
down, he was stronger than he gave himself credit for.
“Hey y/n, it’s time for dinner.” He said, slowly opening up
your door to your dark room
You grumbled and faced your back to him, making his heart
sink to his stomach. He placed the plate of food on your dresser, turned on
your bed room light that burned your eyes and sat next to you, laying his hand
softly on your leg over the blanket.
“You’re depressed again, why? Talk to your moose.” He
chuckled, trying to make you laugh but just as he expected, nothing.
“I won’t leave you. I’ll bring my food up here, and we can
eat together and watch American Dad. How does that sound?” You nodded softly,
making him smile.
“That’s my girl, I’ll be right back.”
It’s been 8 days since you’ve had an actual meal, maybe
more. You, Sam and Dean lost track. The boys would always try to give you any
food you wanted, anything in the world but you wouldn’t take it. The only thing
you’ve been “eating” was snacks, which drove Sam crazy.
“Sweetie, we got you mashed potatoes, your favorite!” He
yelled happily, sitting next to you on your bed and handing you the plate while
you just stared at it.
“Come on y/n, it’s been 8 days without actual food. You
gotta be starving.”
“I’m not hungry, thanks anyways.”
Before you could roll back over he held your shoulder and
looked at you in the eyes with a broken, sad look. You gave him one back and
sighed. You noticed how tired and stressed he looked, as he did at you also.
“It’s okay to not be okay, but it’s not okay to starve yourself.
Eat, I’ll help.”
He picked up the spoon and scooped a little of the mashed
potatoes on it, just a little for you to get used to it and not take to much to
fast. He gave you a sad look again as he fed you the food, smiling as he
realized you actually swallowed it and didn’t just throw it away, probably because
he was there but good enough.
“Sam, I’m to tired to eat.”
“You’re probably tired from not eating.”
The night went on as he slowly fed you. It fled with small
talks and soft laughters, which felt amazing. You two ended the night watching
movies in each other’s arms. That was the first night you both fell asleep, peacefully.
Without a worry in the world.
You woke up with sweat running down your face along with
tears and puffy eyes. It’s been about two weeks since you fell asleep with Sam
and ever since then you haven’t been able to sleep, again.
You got up and threw on your robe, walking quietly out of your
room and on our way down the hall to Sams, peaking in Dean’s open door and
seeing him passed out with a book on his head and beer in his other hand.
You walked in and placed the beer on his nightstand, along with
the book folding the corner of the page so he wouldn’t lose his spot. You
placed his blanket on top of him and noticed him curl into it with a smile,
making you smile for the first time in weeks.
After that you walked to Sam’s room, seeing the door was
closed shut. Your heart raced as you nervously turned the knob and walked into
his pitch black room, scary as hell after the nightmare you just had.
Once you closed the door you heard Sam jump up in his bed
and cock the gun under his pillow, making you terrified.
“It’s just me, Sammy.”
He sighed in relief and placed the gun under his pillow,
turning on the lamp on his lampstand next to his bed after. His hair was in
random places and he looked tired, making you feel guilty that you woke him up.
“I’m s – sorry I woke you up. I’ll go if you want.”
“What? No, no, no. Cm’ here.”
You walked over and laid slowly on his bed as he moved over,
making room for you. After you laid down he wrapped his strong arms around you
tightly, laying his chin on top of your head.
“Nightmare?” You nodded
“We don’t have to talk about it if you want to sleep.” He
shook his head and chuckled softly.
“I would never just abandon you like that besides, I’d
rather spend time with you than sleep, so spill the beans.”
You laid your head more on his chest and wrapped your arms
around his waist as he rubbed his finger tips on your back softly, telling you
“I was in hell, and they kept…just kept making me kill
innocent children. It was terrible, Sammy. I can’t … I can’t even imagine..
Then Lucifer, he showed me you and Dean. Like they looked just like you guys,
but god what they said …”
“You’re holding us up, y/n. Our work would be a lot easier
without you. Not to mention you fuck up all the time.”
“Also, who wants to work with a depressed, suicidal girl?
You know? Gotta watch what ya say all the time. Also, gotta pull your lame ass
out of it cause you’re to fucking weak to do it yourself. Me and Sam? What are
ya gonna do when we’re dead? You’ll be dead too. You can’t live without us, y/n
and you know it. We’re you’re lifeline, cause you’re fucking weak.”
“You should’ve died instead of Charlie, it should’ve been
you up there not her. That’s on you.”
By now you were in tears, as was Sam. He looked at you with
shock, like you were insane. He bit his lip and wiped your tears away, rubbing
his thumb on your cheek as he did.
“There was more, but I don’t …” He cut you off
“You don’t have to finish if you don’t want to, okay? I’m
proud of you for saying all that as it is.”
You nodded sadly as he hugged you, burying your face in his
neck and gripping onto his shirt as you cried. He ran both of his hands up and
down your back and kept telling you sweet things to calm you down, but there
was one thing that got you the most.
“I’m in love with you, y/n.”
You pulled away and looked at him with shock
“I said I love you, you goofball.”
You laughed happily and hugged him tighter again, this time
with tears of joy. You placed your fingers in his brown hair, smiling against
his shoulder while he hugged back, just as happy as you were. You leaned back
and placed your hands on his blushed cheeks, kissing him softly at first but
then harder as time went on.
He ran his big hands in your hair and smiled against your
lips as you did the same. You both pulled away, smile never leaving either of
your faces. You both were happy, for the first time in a long, long time.
“None of those things that that son of a bitch made you
think was true, okay? None. Dean and I love you, very, very much. But he doesn’t
love you like I love you.” He winked, making you chuckle.
“We need you just as much as you need us. We’re family. Cas
needs you, I need you, and Dean needs you. We all need each other to survive in
this insane world, that’s a fact. Also, we don’t mind helping you through your
episodes, okay? I know Cas and Dean don’t do to much, but that’s just cause
they don’t know how I guess. Hell, I barley know how to cheer people up but I
try for you.
Don’t ever, ever! Be scared to ask for help. Asking for help
is okay, always okay. It doesn’t mean you’re not strong, or not powerful enough
to deal with this alone. We all need help sometimes, and that is a – o – kay. I
need your help a lot, you don’t even know how much you help me y/n. You’re
there for me, I’m here for you. Cause we love each other, and that’ll never go
away. I love you, I love you, I love you. It kills me to see you like this,
cause I love you so much. Same for the other two but you know what I mean. So
please, don’t ever be scared to come to one of us. We love you, more than you’ll
He pushed your hair out of your eyes and wiped the stray
tears away, kissing your cheeks after. He laid back with you in his arms and
wrapped each other’s legs with one another. It was cold in the room, but it
felt warm with you two together.
“Always keep fighting the fight, babe. We got this,
And he was right. Sam Winchester, the man who always made
sure the people he loves felt loved as well, and he did a great job at it.
so i decided i would do follow forever for my fav blogs of 2015 (and it took me longer time than i expected because it’s already 2016) and i would like to thank you guys for filling my dash with amazing post and especially being as awesome and amazing as you are because you’re the best part of this website! :) i hope that every single one of you will have a truly great year 2016 and everything you hope to happen in this year will happen. i want you all to know that you’re hella awesome and worthy and you deserve the best! :) <3
there some of my fav blogs and if you think i forgot to mention you, just message me and i’ll put you there (which is likely because i made this follow forever very fast) :) fav blogs are bolded!
hello~ it’s almost 2016 here in about few minutes for me and my blog just turned two yesterday so i feel like i should take the time to appreciate a lot of lovely people on here and some that i’ve became friends with. thank you for taking the time to check out my blog, following me and staying, reblogging my original content, it means a lot really! so thank you so much. i’m sorry if i haven’t talked or even said a word to some of you (really i’m so sorry i’m shy lol) but yeah it’s been really nice being in this fandom and getting to meet new people while supporting bangtan and all of you guys make it really enjoyable so thank you again. you all run amazing blogs and i hope 2016 brings you a lot of happiness and good health, happy new year! ♡
Just wanted to say thank you for all the love on both #blackout days. I was someone who never really ever took selfie before a few years ago. There’s something about developing a disability that makes you feel like you have to prove to yourself that you’re still you or makes you want to document yourself before it takes hold. Thanks for the reblogs, likes, new follows and especially the kind tags (we were in here cracking up at some of y’all). I know people like to stereotype us as the selfie generation and label us narcissistic, but I think we love each other like no generation before us ever has. It’s about connection, it’s about health; mental and physical. Tumblr has been such a haven for me and I hope that I can help with my blog like some of y’all have helped me…
So yeah, I’ve been here for almost 2 years and so it time for me to do a follow forever! I was going to do a seperate FF for my 4k+ followers, but then I realized that it was also going to be my 2nd year anniversary for my blog in a few weeks. So I decided to combine the two.
I would also like to apologize for my inactivity for these past months. School over took me and I simply couldn’t be here as much. Now that it’s summer break I should be back to normal activity!
(sort of, I have a part time internship right now)
Anyways, thank you for the 4.1k+ follows and for sticking around for these 2 years!