this took literally

sherlocks-freebitch  asked:

IMPENDING SODOMY GAZE ilysm *applauds wildly*

Ridiculously Detailed Profile

Tagged by: @vexredain @sagolii-snowflake @isoldegreyffxiv @zevet-xiv

Tagging: @bourgeoisfury @braden-ffxiv @etani-a @amiraxiv @morlipie @thavnairian @slizzered-sasscat @mother-muscles @tarot-dancer @minquisitor @yladri @sasha-rochester @neekaxiv @theash-hatrukoth @aigiarn @nipuni @rykari @within-the-rain @ghostlyfoxangel @avetterayohffxiv and tbh anyone who hasn’t done it yet, if you want to, consider yourself tagged by me!


  • Gender: Female
  • Race: Miqo’te, Seeker of the Sun
  • Height: 5 fulms, 3 ilms
  • Eye Color: One gold, one green
  • Hair Color: Golden-brown, sun-faded lighter towards the tips

The Facts:

  • Name Day: Who knows? Definitely not her.
  • Occupation: Ul’dahn troupe dancer
  • Allegiance: Mostly to herself, really.
  • Sexual identification: Pansexual, demisexual
  • Romantic identification: Panromantic
  • Alignment: Chaotic Good, though leaning close to Chaotic Neutral
  • Criminal History: Disturbing the peace, petty theft, relatively minor things like that. However, she has been an accessory to grand theft in the first degree.
  • Relationship Status: In a monogamous relationship
  • Sweet on: @braden-ffxiv


  • Favourite food: Sticky cinnamon buns from one particular stall on the Sapphire Avenue Exchange. Otherwise, she favours fruit, or spiced meat with flatbread.
  • Favourite drink: Water, or stupidly ostentatious cocktails of all kinds.
  • Favourite artist: She doesn’t have one; she thinks art (whether musical, visual, culinary, etc) is about passion, and as long as the artist is passionate about their work, she personally likes it regardless of quality. A bad singer who does so with gusto is more valuable to her than a talented singer who sings halfheartedly.
  • Favourite scents: Bright fruity ones, or Braden’s pine cologne.
  • Favourite person: Braden. But with regards to platonic affection, nobody has even come close to how much she cared for her recently deceased twin brother.


(below the readmore!)

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meowdoglover  asked:

May I please ask how the 2p allies would react to finding a baby dragon chilling in their oven?

Oh dear, don’t give these guys a dragon! That is such a bad idea! -Admin Jay

2p America: “WHAT THE FU-uhhh…you paying rent for that? I mean not like I use it…”
Allen would jump back and stare at the dragon before blinking and shaking his head. Why did all the weird shit happen to him? After tapping the oven and carefully waking it up, Allen would actually be pretty chill with it. It’s just a big snake…with fire…he’s had girlfriends like that before, nothing new. Though he would explain to the dragon that he wouldn’t have any meat for it to eat, but if it wanted to stay it could. He’s had much weirder roommates….*cough cough Zhao cough cough*

2p Canada: *wouldn’t find the dragon until it is big enough to hang out of the oven* “… have you been eating my food?”

Matt wouldn’t care too much about there being a dragon in his oven (he never used it anyways), more the fact he never noticed it until it was basically just lounging in his kitchen. Once he looked it over, he would raise an eyebrow and question whether it ate all of his food or not, but if it wanted to hang around he would be chill with it. The dragon could have the woods out back to itself as long as it didn’t burn the house down or eat all of his food.  

2p England: “Oh hello there! I hope you don’t mind moving for a tick! I need to bake these treats! You can have some!”

Oliver would notice immediately since he is an avid baker, though he would be more excited to have a new friend in his kitchen with him. He would offer to make the dragon a nice little roost so it didn’t have to sit in the cramped oven. Oliver would feed the dragon any treats he made, and would even try to make treats that are good for the dragon since he would adore having something to keep him company and feed.  

2p France: *would never find the dragon unless it forced him to notice it* “Don’t burn my house down…”

Francois would just raise his eyebrow at the dragon and scoff as he smokes his cigarette. He wouldn’t want to keep the dragon, but he wouldn’t care enough to be avid on getting rid of it. So it would just be allowed to lounge in his oven or wherever as long as it didn’t burn his house down. Although…he wouldn’t mind having a living cigarette lighter. Saves him money in a way…

2p China: “OH WOW OKAY DIDN’T SEE THAT COMING! You been hiding out there long?”

Zhao would scream and jump before raising his eyebrows and poking the dragon to make sure it is real. Once establishing that yes in fact a real dragon is living in his oven, he would laugh and offer it some leftover pizza and allow it to roam through his house as long as it didn’t eat everything he had or ruin his chances with the ladies. Do ladies like dragons? 

2p Russia: “Why are you in an oven?”

Viktor wouldn’t really care, he just would want it out of the oven so he could make food for himself. The dragon could stay or go, but if it decided to leave he would ask for it to drop any kind of meat on top of Allen or on his place of residence. Though Viktor really wouldn’t mind having a dragon as a pet, it would add to his intimidating factor. 

Oh man I really wanted to write some fluffy AU plasma and for some reason the only plot bunny stopping by my field at the moment is “medieval AU where Jay is a noble/mage who dabbled too much with necromancy and now he’s a vampire and he keeps eating his subjects. His childhood friends Kai and Nya are both technically his thralls, but he cant bring himself to feed from Kai for Some Reason”

So uh, please hmu if you would actually like to read this because I feel like it’s too weird


Eleven + “Mike”


“Maybe I got tired of seeing Kevin bend. Or maybe it was the zombies.”
    When Andrew just stared at him, Neil shrugged and said, “A few weeks back you and Renee argued contingency plans for a zombie apocalypse. She said she’d focus on survivors. You said you’d go back for some of us. Five of us,” Neil said, splaying his fingers at Andrew. “You weren’t counting Abby or Coach. Since you trust Renee to handle the rest of the team, I’m guessing the last spot is for Dobson.”
    He knew Andrew wouldn’t answer that, so he dropped his hand and said, “I didn’t say anything then because I knew I’d only look out for me when the world went to hell. I don’t want to be that person anymore. I want to go back for y o u.”