this thing is to horrifying not to love

official-europa  asked:

For the plot hook prompt! "The sky looks lovely this time of year"

It was a lovely day, that is if you considered roiling gunmetal clouds and green lightning to be lovely. Not many people did, but then again Sarlath wasn’t most people. This was a clear sign of a disaster, but the orc didn’t seem to mind; he wasn’t the cause, mind you, nor did he necessarily want the world to end, but since his whole clan was ruthlessly butchered by a party of adventurers he’d become rather apathetic to the whole thing.

But he had to admit that there was a kind of horrifying beauty to the sky, just one he couldn’t place.

Sarlath is in possession of the blade that the party who killed his people was after, the blade that can defeat the thing that’s causing the sky to be all ominous. He’d managed to kill the party who’d killed his people eventually, but not until they’d been worn down by the others. He now hoards their loot in the battle scarred settlement; a collection of decent quality weapons and magical items, and may be convinced to part with them given a good enough persuasion roll and, to lower the DC, a well RPed and thought out argument from the player.

I hate this. Things like this scare the shit out of me.
Yes a parent should be protective. No they should not STALK their child.
Yes a parent can get upset at a child. No they should not flip out or let their anger make them out of control, or take out their anger on their child.
Yes a parent can lecture and maybe the kid feels like their parent is driving them crazy - but after the last two statements forgive me if I don’t exactly trust these definitions.
A parent should never be their child’s worst nightmare. A pain sometimes, ok, but not a nightmare.
And the idea of a parent “stalking” and “hunting down” their child is horrifying. If you were a good parent, maybe your child would have communicated whereabouts upfront with you already.
And the last statement is the worst. “I will subject you to terror and treat you like my property…. Because I love you!” No one would ever put up with this from a partner, a friend, even a grandparent…. Why is it suddenly okay from a parent?

Fuck toxic parenting.

anonymous asked:

Hi Alice, odd question but: Do you believe asexuals belong in the LGBT community? I have a friend who identifies this way, but as a trans girl, I'm struggling to understand how she has to go through the same things as an LGBT person by being asexual. And struggle aside, I don't even see how asexuality is THAT different from heterosexuality, just with more... hesitation!? Maybe this sounds rude, but I know you've written about asexual people etc, and I wondered what you thought. No shade intended

Hi there. I’m glad you reached out to me about this because you must have really upset your friend by saying stuff like this to them.

It’s easy to see why not only cishet people, but also LGBT+ people, think that asexuality is fake. The world is awash with sex and sexual attraction. It’s everywhere. And everyone is supposed to want it and feel it. It’s so extremely normalised that the idea that someone could be literally UNABLE to feel sexual attraction is, to many people, absolutely bizarre and a joke.

Even if you acknowledge that asexuality is real, it’s also easy to see why you would be so quick to reject and get angry at asexual people who call themselves LGBT+. Because asexual people are not like you, are they. Unless they are trans, asexuals don’t have gender troubles, and unless they experience same-gender romantic attraction, asexuals don’t experience same-gender attraction! Lesbian, bi, gay etc people can all be joined together in their experience of same gender attraction, and all trans folks, binary and non binary, can be joined together in their experience of feeing a disconnect from their assigned birth gender.

The result? No one wants asexuals near them. People can’t relate. No one else feels the way asexuals do and people don’t think they should be part of the group. They’re not the same as you.

But oh god, they are not allowed in the cishet club either.

The first thing you need to try and unlearn is that asexuality is in any way similar to heterosexuality. It’s not. It’s so, so fucking not. It’s painful how different it feels to be asexual compared to being heterosexual. Telling an ace person that asexuality isn’t ‘THAT different from heterosexuality’ is about as accurate as saying being gay isn’t ‘THAT different from heterosexuality’. Being asexual means you do not experience sexual attraction, ever. EVER. And while that might seem easy to you, it’s an extremely painful and terrifying thing to learn about yourself, in a world where everyone is expected to have an array of sexual experiences, fall in love, get married, and anyone who doesn’t do that is strange and a freak.

Learning you are asexual can be terrifying. When you realise you’ve never had a crush, when all your friends have had ten each, you are terrified. When you pass the age where people have started dating and having sex and you still feel nothing - NOTHING - you are terrified. When you think about ever falling in love and the idea disgusts you, or you think about falling in love and you crave it, god you CRAVE it, but you know you can’t ever feel that, you are terrified. When you realise you will never be able to enjoy a normal romantic/sexual relationship, the ones full of passion like you see in the movies, and people will reject you because you can’t fancy them in that way, and there’s a higher chance for you than anyone else that you will simply die alone, without love, without children - you are terrified.

You think being ace is the same as heterosexuality? You think it’s an easy thing to learn about yourself? Explain the terror, then. I’m all ears.

The fact you see asexuality as 'hesitation’ is really horrifying to me. Asexuals aren’t attracted to the opposite gender but 'hesitant’ to act on it. Asexuals DO NOT feel attraction. To anyone. It’s not a choice. It’s not a way of life. It’s not the same as celibacy out of choice, or being a 'prude’, or waiting till marriage. It is ingrained in you, just like being gay is, just like being trans is. It is a part of you that no matter how hard you try to will it away, no matter how hard you try to persuade yourself otherwise, you cannot help it. You DO NOT feel attracted to ANYONE.

And in saying all this, I fully acknowledge that asexuals do not experience the extent of oppression that other LGBT+ folks do. There are no laws regarding asexuality. Lesbian, gay, bi, trans, and other LGBT+ folks no doubt experience a higher level and intensity of systematic oppression to asexuals, more frequently go through hard experiences due to their orientation or gender. But since when did being LGBT+ become a competition for 'who’s the most oppressed’? Is that what LGBT+ is? You’re only allowed in the club if you’re 'oppressed enough’? If you’re 'gay enough’? If you’re 'trans enough’?

If you need persuading that asexuals do experience their own form of oppression, though, consider the number of asexuals who are coerced into sex in order to 'fix’ them. Consider the emotional pain that I have already discussed, of feeling that there is something fundamentally wrong and gross about you because you feel attracted to no one. Consider the number of asexuals who are hounded or emotionally abused by their families for failing to find partners. Consider the number of asexuals who force themselves to have sexual experiences, because it is the norm, because they don’t even know what asexuality is, because THEY think that they are just 'hesitant’, despite finding sex disgusting and feeling no desire to do it. Do you really think asexuals are just running around, free and happy and content in who they are? They aren’t. I’m not.

So go ahead. Cast aside asexuals if you want. Call them attention-seeking, call them special snowflakes. Ignore the pain they feel. Make them go through it alone, in pain, terrified of what they are. Why on earth would the LGBT+ community be a place to support people like that!?

Messages like the one you have just sent me gives me further reason to never talk about that part of myself. To just sit and cry about it at home day after day because I do not like myself. Because I feel that nobody will accept me or understand who I am. I could list the number of things people have said to me to discredit and laugh at this part of myself, but it’s people like you who make me embarrassed to talk about it, too scared to own a label and talk about it freely and openly.

I thought, going into this, that the LGBT+ community was one of total respect, understanding, and empathy. I learnt pretty quickly that it is not.

I send love to your asexual friend. I really, really do.

Disclaimer: I am very aware of the nuances of asexuality, of the differences between romantic/aesthetic/sexual attraction, but sadly it seems that many people can’t even grasp the basic concept of asexuality, so I don’t quite think they’re ready for that yet.

abuse doesn’t always look like yelling or hitting or even anything we see as hurtful; abuse can be backwards comments like “you’re pretty when you’re thin”, abuse can be quiet and vicious and insidious like, “i’m the only one who gets you” “if anyone else knew about this they’d be horrified but i love you for it” “your friends don’t understand you like i do and they never will”

abuse works because you don’t realize it at first, if ever. abuse works because it trains you, slowly. it makes you compromise on things. it sets you a step back by an inch, because if you go too quick, you’ll realize what’s happening. it’s being the frog in water, but the water tells you that it’s trying to make you better. and abuse works best when you’re mentally ill. it runs off of it. it takes the negative things you already feel and just amplifies all of it. how can it be abuse when you were already thinking all of it? it was your idea to begin with, it’s just that someone confirmed it.

sometimes i still wonder if it actually happened or i imagined it. sometimes i realize in a flash what felt normal was actually abusive. something as small as being worried when someone isn’t smiling. abuse rarely fits the way people want it to look, because abusers want you to think it’s only bloody teeth and a right hook. this is how they get you. they say, oh you’d never be silly enough for that, and you think, of course, if my partner hit me, i’d leave. but then your partner, who you love more than anything, they say things like “i don’t want you going out tonight” and at first it’s fine. nobody ever wakes up letting someone hit them. it’s just that you compromise. you let little things go until you’re trained to let big things go until you’re trained so well that you’ve let your own soul go. and you can’t just pull back control. abuse works because you can wake up there, at the bottom of the hole - but there’s just nowhere to go.

other ancient tumblr culture things 

  • peasants 
  • greeting every new follower with a gif 
  • the anger over wonderballs being banned in the us 
  • i still see this every once in a while but adding “and then the fire nation attacked” to every post talking about how something used to be 
  • i see this everyone once in a while too but the “you tried” star 
  • nigel thornberry 
  • personifying social media (or making them dresses or whatever else) 
  • actually just personifying anything not even remotely human
  • and then shipping them
  • #coulsonisalive 
  • hatred of 12 year olds 
  • remember when everyone loved john green?
  • the “not as much of an asshole as you could have been” award
  • that post with every one of those girls late excuses
  • reblog as a link 
  • “3d” gifs 
  • when everyone loved robert pattinson for hating twilight 
  • “night blogging”
  • those horrifying barbie pictures where everyone would pretend not to notice the gore 
  • how shitty the video system was for so long
  • that post where mom dinosaur plays pretend w her son to distract him from the comet that killed the dinosaurs 
  • this is a genuinely good meme and we should bring it back: cosmo sex tips 
  • “i like your shoelaces” “thanks i got them from the president” 
  • repeating the same comment over and over just bolded and italicized differently 

I adore the duality of Tony Stark. Not the secret identity thing, but this idea, one that you get to see more of in the comics than the films (though IM1 did this a lot): the idea that there’s this aloof, cold businessman who puts on perfectly-tailored suits and snarks his way through a room and destroys opponents without a thought using an offhand quip, and resorts to pragmatism when nobody else will, and wears his playboy persona on his sleeve, and knows all the easiest ways to blow up a person or a world, and has a bit of a god complex, and used to be called the Merchant of Death -

- but he’s also the guy who wanders around like a zombie before the first coffee of the day, and works with his hands, and spends his time with mad-scientist hair and wearing scruffy vests covered in oil because he got caught up in his hard work and his passion for creation. He’s the guy who will do anything for his friends and makes silly jokes over breakfast and wholeheartedly, dorkily loves the Avengers, from the concept of it to the people in it. He falls hard for the people he loves, and is incredibly lonely. He’s the guy who goes to orphanages and holds babies when he can’t sleep, and adores kids. He’s the guy who cries easily, never thinks he’s doing enough, struggles with alcoholism and chronic illnesses, and desperately doesn’t want to be his father, no matter how much the media pins the opposite on him. He loves the world and the people in it, even when he kind of hates them, and is constantly working to make things better. He remembers his employees’ names and asks after their families. He tries to see the good in people and goes for rehabilitative over punitive justice wherever possible, even when it comes to villains who have actively tried to kill him. He’s known for how much he cares, exhaustingly, about everything. He’s the man who honestly has a good heart and is constantly trying to reach out, and often gets laughed at for his idealism. He’s a man who’s so often in pain, but tries to use it to improve the world rather than letting it destroy him.

Sure, I like his ruthlessness and some of his coolness, but I also love the guy who unironically adores classic Star Trek and makes absentminded Dune and Arthurian references and thinks equations are cool; who makes mental notes of his friends’ favourite breakfasts and takes young heroes under his wing and is semi-jokingly horrified when one doesn’t have a file system. Who goes “but why does that do that?” and wants to take everything apart and fix it so it can help people, and honest to god believes in a better future. 

(The movies are subtler about that side of him, but it’s still there. I mean, as a little thing, I’m always grateful they let RDJ put some of his own love of classic and sometimes silly rock into Tony Stark. Not just because I share that music taste, but I always like characters who are nerdy and wholehearted about at least something. But the bigger stuff, too: the between-the-lines moments: the naming his bots, the “here, have my whole R&D lab/my company/my home/my heart if you want it, why do you look so surprised?” That’s all straight from the comics. It’s just done slightly more snarkily and with a slightly shorter, brown-eyed Tony rather than a tall, blue-eyed one.)

But it’s still a very bad idea to piss him off.

He’s both. I love that he’s both.

ok New Jersey is the butt of just about everyone’s jokes, and so it honestly shocks me that no one ever talks about pork roll. Because it is frankly the most hilarious thing about New Jersey.

Pork roll is a pork-based processed meat that’s served as a patty. It’s essentially a hotdog shaped like a hamburger, and it’s exactly as disgusting and horrifying as it sounds.

Except everyone in New Jersey loves pork roll. We fucking love it. Every deli offers it as part of a sandwich, and some people just order it as a side and eat it with a fork and knife. The capital of our state literally has a yearly pork roll festival. Even the McDonald’s in New Jersey will make you a pork roll egg and cheese (called a “Jersey breakfast” around here). We are fucking serious about our pork roll.

I forgot to mention the best part, which is that only half of us call it pork roll. The other half calls it Taylor ham. North Jersey says Taylor ham and south jersey says pork roll, and central jersey is our Switzerland because they say both. Multiple New Jersey newspapers have done studies to try to figure out where the line between the two names is, and they’ve come out with tons of different maps trying to show exactly where the border between Taylor ham and pork roll is.

And this isn’t a friendly debate: people in New Jersey are ready to go to war and die over what the correct name for this lunch meat is. I went to college in central jersey, and I witnessed people get into legit FIGHTS over what it’s called.

The most hilarious part, though, is that a couple years back, state legislators thought it would be fun and easy to make it the official state sandwich. Except then they DIDNT KNOW WHAT TO CALL IT, and the politicians we elected to represent us literally spent our tax dollars debating the name of this lunch meat on the fucking senate floor. And the best part? They never made a decision and dropped the bill altogether. The debate between pork roll and Taylor ham rages on, and probably will forever.

You know what really gets to me about episode 1 of this new season? When Max steps out of the purification sauna and says that he loves Daniel, what’s the first thing that David says? He says that it’s wrong, and he looks absolutely horrified.

Those brief seconds weren’t about him potentially losing his job, they were about Max being profoundly not himself and David being not okay with that, even though supposedly getting Max to open up and be happy is exactly what he’s wanted the entire show.

This fleeting little moment implies that David actually likes and appreciates Max exactly the way he is, even if he gets nothing but well suppressed frustration out of it.

The Best Films of 2017 - Mid-Year List

There have already been many great films so far this year, so I felt it worth doing a run down of my favourite films of the year so far. These all reflect the cinema releases we’ve had so far in the UK in 2017 - for that reason this list includes some films that were released in the US in 2016. Enjoy, and I’d love to hear your thoughts on the best films of the year so far!

Honourable mentions: Their Finest, Colossal, Gifted

1. Get Out, dir. Jordan Peele

This film really knocked me for six, to such an extent that I simply had to see it twice in the cinema. It got even better upon a re-watch, when I was able to watch it with full knowledge of the characters’ underlying motives and the things to come. It’s a terrifying concept (the racism of an all-white suburb is taken to a horrifying extreme) executed with incredible panache, and you feel every emotion that Chris goes through thanks to Daniel Kaluuya’s excellent performance. Get Out also represents one of the most brilliantly communal experiences I’ve ever had at the cinema - I won’t spoil it, but let’s just say that the audience erupted into spontaneous applause at a key moment in the climax. Simply fantastic. 

2. The Handmaiden, dir. Park Chan-wook

This film is exquisite - it’s first and foremost a beautiful boundary-smashing love story, and an absolutely marvellous tale of female defiance. It transplants Sarah Waters’ novel Fingersmith to 1930s Korea, and the story is effortlessly adapted to become intrinsically interwoven with its new setting. Sookee is a talented pickpocket plucked from a thieves den and sent as a handmaiden to trick a rich heiress into falling for a conman. To say any more would spoil the twists, but this film is just a masterwork of suspense, keeping you guessing throughout a series of interlocking pieces that take their time to reveal their secrets. I’ve seen the theatrical cut and the extended version, and they’re both great - you’re in for a treat with either.

3. Jackie, dir. Pablo Larrain

This is a film that soars on the strength of Natalie Portman’s incredible performance, which is complemented by Mica Levi’s haunting score. Portman’s performance is painfully vivid, with her agony and wretchedness coming through so intensely that it’s often uncomfortable to watch. Jackie is probably the best portrait of grief I’ve ever seen, and it sucks you into a famous historic event by providing an incredibly intimate perspective on it. This is great cinema, but be prepared for suffering.

4. A Cure for Wellness, dir. Gore Verbinski

This is a delightfully strange Gothic fairy tale of a film, and I’m amazed and impressed that a Hollywood studio gave Gore Verbinski a budget sufficient to pull it off with such beauty and style. I’ve seen this film attract love and hate in equal measure, but I adore it - the trailers set you up for a rehash of Shutter Island, but nothing could be further from the truth beyond the isolated setting. If I had to compare this to anything, I would compare it to Roger Corman’s Poe cycle of films from the 1960s - it has a similarly lurid sensibility and a deep-seated sense of fantastic romanticism at its core. Great if you’re after something uncompromisingly bonkers.

5. Wonder Woman, dir. Patty Jenkins

This film represented pure joy for me - I couldn’t have anticipated how emotional I was going to get at witnessing a (wonder!)woman crossing No Man’s Land and deflecting bullets with her bracelets. This simultaneously rejects the wry self-awareness of the Marvel films and the grim self-importance of the previous DC movies, instead unabashedly depicting a superhero who triumphs thanks to her overriding belief in love and compassion. Patty Jenkins adds endless little touches - from funny moments to quiet scenes where characters talk simply to learn about each other - that enrich the film and make it feel vivid and intimate in a very rare and special way.

6. Silence, dir. Martin Scorsese

This is truly the work of a master filmmaker, and it represents a stunning artistic achievement and a moving and intelligent investigation of the threshold of faith. Scorsese tried to get this made for decades before finally succeeding, and his passion for and belief in the project shine through in every painstakingly crafted frame. Silence is equal parts beauty and brutality, and it uses this contrast to illuminate the painful questions that the faithful must ask themselves when faced with the harsh reality of the present world. It’s heavy stuff, but well worth your time if you’re up for a film that raises more questions than it answers.

7. In This Corner of the World, dir. Sunao Katabuchi

I had no idea this film existed until a few days before I saw it, but I was really struck by its poetic treatment of the joys and tragedies of life. This film follows a young bride who moves to live with her husband’s family in WWII-era Japan, and while it deals unflinchingly with the trauma and horror of war - particularly the bombing of Hiroshima - it’s also surprisingly funny and ultimately hopeful. The power of this film comes through in the little moments of human connection and the way that the full potential of animation is exploited to maximum effect.

8. La La Land, dir. Damien Chazelle

A lovely ode to the classic Hollywood musical, La La Land is a technical marvel that sticks with me because of its heart and humanity (those words are recurring a lot, right?). It tells a very small story of a love affair between two dreamers in Hollywood, but it feels much bigger than them because of the way in which their story is told. La La Land draws from influences across the spectrum of cinema, and its homages to the classics are joyful and loving. The final ‘what might have been’ sequence represents the perfect marriage of raw emotion and filmmaking virtuosity. 

9. Okja, dir. Bong Joon-ho

Not many films can balance flatulence jokes with uncompromising critique of capitalist greed, but Okja pulls it off with aplomb. The core story hinges on the innocent and endearing friendship between a young girl named Mija and a bio-engineered super pig called Okja, and the film succeeds because you totally buy their connection and desperately want the two of them to have their wish and live together in the mountains. I’m delighted that Netflix gave Bong Joon-ho a platform to make such a weird beast.

10. Logan, dir. James Mangold

Logan may be bleak, but that isn’t what makes it great - Logan is fantastic cinema because it remembers that superheroes are still people who struggle with their own souls as much as super-villains. This film features the best character work managed in any of the X-Men films, and Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart and - in particular - Dafne Keen give heart-rending performances that really ground the film and give it an emotional core. I hope we get more superhero films like this, and that the takeaway from it for the industry is the importance of stressing character rather than frantic spectacle.

Most anticipated films still to come: War for the Planet of the Apes, Valerian and the City of A Thousand Planets, Dunkirk, The Beguiled, Mother!, Logan Lucky, Blade Runner 2049, Murder on the Orient Express, The Shape of Water, Annihilation, Star Wars: The Last Jedi

so for now, it hurts
my bones still crack under the weight of my heavy heart and my eyes still well up with tears when i think of your lips on hers
i don’t think a day has gone by since you left where i haven’t felt completely fucking broken, destroyed, left for dead and drowning in the pain that you caused
it’s hard to think of your smile and your laugh and your voice and try to accept that they’re not mine to hear and cherish anymore
and i think part of me will always feel like this
i will always feel sick when i hear her name and i will never get rid of our photos and i will wish you were there waiting for me at the end of the aisle and i will wish we would have grown old together and i will wish and i will wish and i will wish
but one thing i’ve learned from being without you is that i can wish my life away and it will never get you to come back and i will never get to hold your hand again and i will never be able to get lost in your eyes again
and the thing that horrifies me is that i know i will never be able to forget you because you’ve never given me a reason to hate you and i wish that you had because at least things would be easier
—  a love i never wanted to lose, pt. 1

anonymous asked:

How would draco react to going on the camping trip with the golden trio? If harry and draco were in a relationship and he refused to stay behind like ginny, what would happen? I have this vision in my head of draco cursing out nature and asking the heavens why did he have to fall in love with harry bloddy potter!

I can totally see that.  I definitely think Draco would be the complaining type.

  • “Yes, Potter, all of this stuff I packed is necessary and I cannot get rid of a single thing.”
  • “For Merlin’s sake could you stop almost dying every five seconds!”
  • ““No, Potter, I most certainly will not eat whatever that is that you’re pretending is food. I’d rather starve to death than be killed by your cooking.”
  • “I should’ve known this was going to be a disaster.  Just look at where we’re camped out.  There are sticks and dirt and we can’t even use magic to warm ourselves up right now I’m going to freeze to death and I’ll have you know it will be all your fault, Potter.”

But also, for all of Draco’s complaining there would be things like…

  • Draco refusing to sleep all night, his fingers tracing the dark circles under Harry’s eyes as he fitfully sleeps
  • Draco doing whatever small things he can to bring Harry comfort, like warming charms when its safe to do so, or a cushioning charm on the ground.  And he doesn’t say anything because it seems stupid and insignificant in the face of trying to escape Voldemort but he feels useless and wants to take care of Harry
  • Sleepless nights with their back to a tree, shivering in the dark, dirty and cold but both breathing, both alive; and that’s enough
  • Draco whispering every night when Harry falls asleep “I’m gonna love you forever you fucking idiot so don’t you dare die on me.”
  • Draco pretending he is horrified by Harry’s cooking and refusing to eat, getting Harry completely pissed off, except the only reason Draco does it is so that Harry will eat his portion of food because Harry looks so weak, so thin and Draco knows he won’t eat it any other way so he does whatever it takes to give Harry the only kind of strength he can offer

on loving the human

i. they will not appreciate all your gifts, will akin them to a cat bringing dead mice to their feet. this is fine. everything else you give, they will find gorgeous. if you are vain enough, give them something of yours to wear. if you are rash enough, give them something of yours to wear. they will find it beautiful and every Other will know you’ve claimed that one. be sure no one else, such as Not-Cat or even the crows, have done the same yet. a human, no matter their talents, would be worth such a war. you must remember this, if you see them keeping feathers-blacker-than-night in their hair/pockets/pouches. you might be able to fool them from another Fair, but, if the birds have gotten to them, there is no return. best to pick another that can catch your attention. any of them would start pleased with that.

ii. to appear human while first wooing them is best. you will need two ears, two eyes, a nose with (only!) two nostrils, 32 teeth, 206 bones, and about 640 muscles that do not slide or slip or slush. both halves of your (singular) face must react together, but not mechanically, robotically, stiffly, or in any manner similar to plastic or silicon. one side of your mouth must not be higher or lower than the other unless it is a facial expression, of a half-smile or frown. your eyes must not be too close together, or too far apart, your ears must be even, the spacing of your nose-to-eyes-to-ears-to-forehead must all be within a certain ratio. if you must, watch a good artist space faces to see the estimate. but you must not be too perfect, either: your teeth not too straight or too white, your nails not too clean or pristinely cut or without variation, your skin not too blemish-free. you need some faults in order to appear human. you must maintain solid form at all times. still, it’s likely they’ll know, regardless. at least, they’ll probably appreciate the effort. (remember, being seen without protection is even more telling. keep sugar and pewter/tin/aluminum with you at all times; these will look enough like salt and iron. it is also advisable you carry ‘offerings,’ even if you never leave them anywhere. creamer cups are most popular.)

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A Cryptid in my Neighborhood????

Hey there you guys. So something a little weird happened this morning, and I’ve been aching to tell someone.

So I wait at the bus stop with my sister every morning. Everything’s been normal up until around last week, when the weather started getting warmer. I started to notice that at 7 AM, every morning, I would look down the street and a cat would make its way quickly from behind a house, trot across the street and keep on going into another yard. Same path every time.

So I lean over to my sister and I say all hushed, “Same cat every morning. Same time. Isn’t that weird?” And I look back over to the Cat.

It has halted its daily regiment to stop dead and turn its head towards me.

The Cat does not move.

I cannot see its face.

I’m not sure if it was just the light. I’m not sure if it was turned the other way. I knew I could feel it looking at me though I could see no eyes.

I turn to my sister, getting kind of nervous, and I say, “Is it looking at me?” My sister shrugs. I look back and The Cat is crossing my lawn. It’s crossing my neighbor’s lawn.

I think something’s going on. Was It drawn out because of the heat? Where is It going? Can It hear me? For reference, I drew out what I saw.

I think something’s going on in my little town. I think I’m gonna call this series “Cryptids of Coalition County”. I’ll report any new findings to you as soon as I can. We can call The Cat specimen number one.

Thank you for reading, my dear friend. I’ll hope you’ll join me in my journey. That is, if I have much time left. Do I already know too much?

Exordia Academy (Master List)

It’s 1980′s middle-of-nowhere, and Exordia Academy is full of its most talented class of students yet. Whether you’re looking for a place to hone your skills, develop or just fit in – there’s something for everyone within our hallowed halls. Class is in session.

Originally posted by jonginssoo


Jongin. Knowledge Absorption. Jongin was very young, when he learned to stay silent. When he learned his knowledge was alienating, his genius a burden. He learned early, knowing too much makes others fearful, since people (ironically enough) tend to fear the unknown. Until Jongin finds you. You, as it turns out, are something much more difficult to understand. 

One Shot by @kpopfanfictrash​ - [ Anomaly ]

Originally posted by intokai

Kyungsoo. Telepathy. For someone who finds solace in silence, Kyungsoo’s life is overwhelming at best. Everywhere he goes, everyone he meets is loud, deafeningly so. He never asked for this gift. To know exactly what people think, the moment they think it. Thoughts which more often than not, make him think people are jealous, self-servicing cowards. Always, he’s wished the voices would stop and always, he’s met with more. That is, until he’s alone with you and, for the first time in his life – he hears absolutely nothing. 

One Shot by @knockknocksoosthere - [ Noise ]

Originally posted by kyungsuhos

Junmyeon. Psychokinesis. Junmyeon does not touch things if he can help it. It’s not that he doesn’t want to. It’s just that nothing ever truly prepares a person for the lived experiences of objects. Touching a book means he does not get the words inside, he gets the laughter of the person who read it last. Touching a door means he is forced to live every impossible life of the men and women who have been and gone from the room. Junmyeon does not touch things if he can help it. Until he touches a dormitory wall. Until he hears you. 

One Shot by @bread-jinie - [ Replay ] 

Originally posted by tinyjunmyeon

Sehun. Invisibility. Sehun remembers the very first time he turned invisible. It was in his primary school days, he was performing Tap Solo #5 in the middle of the stage. Sehun entered from stage left, promptly forgetting the very first move. His legs faltered, mind went blank – and sudden screams erupted from the audience, when Sehun’s body disappeared. His family moved the next week. This kind of thing becomes normal, though – until the day Sehun is invisible, and you see him anyways.

One Shot by @kpopfanfictrash - [ Blue Roses ]

Originally posted by kyungsuhos

Minseok. Essokinesis. Reality has never been kind to Minseok. Always, he’s been overlooked. Always picked last, always bullied by those larger than him. Until one day, he snaps. He imagines himself towering over his tormentors, striking fear into their puny hearts and dangling them from his palm. When he realizes they, too experience this distorted reality – things begin to change. No longer is Minseok nobody. The first time he steps foot on campus, people know who he is. He sees them whisper, sees them shy away and while he finds comfort in their fear – it’s lonely. When he meets you though, he finds you don’t look away. Perhaps there’s a reason.  

One Shot by @knockknocksoosthere - [ Dark ]

Originally posted by kimjongah

Yixing. Time Travel. Life for Yixing has never been easy. It’s not that he’s from a bad family, it isn’t even that he fits a stereotype. The problem is that he fits no stereotype, and people, as kind as they can be, have the tendency to be impossibly cruel to things that seem to exist outside of society’s boxes. Yixing really doesn’t fit into anywhere or any when, until he fades. Until he reforms. Until he finds you.

One Shot by @bread-jinie - [ the week of 10 / 15 - 10 / 21 ]

Originally posted by chiuyixing

Baekhyun. Aquakinesis.  Baekhyun thinks he has control over his powers by now. Thinks he’s past that prepubescent age where his sadness brought drizzles and his anger, monsoons. All this though, is before he makes the terrible and horrifying mistake of falling in love with his best friend. You. 

One Shot by @kpopfanfictrash - [ the week of 10 / 22 - 10 / 28 ]

Originally posted by fy-exo

Chanyeol. Pyrokinesis. Chanyeol isn’t entirely sure why his parents enrolled him at the university, considering he has never presented any remotely special power. He’s a quick learner, but nothing like Jongin; he’s skilled at sports, but nothing like his friends with enhanced speed. In truth, Chanyeol thinks he’s simply average and simply human. He doesn’t mind, he’s watched his family struggle with their powers for years and thinks of these problems as a burden. But then one day he meets you, and everything inside him is set aflame. Literally. 

One Shot by @bread-jinie - [ the week of 10 / 29 - 11 / 4 ]

Originally posted by porkdo-bi

Jongdae. Enhanced Strength. Jongdae remembers the exact moment he knew he was different. He slammed the door to his room, a normal, teenage reaction but was terrified when the plaster and plywood crumbled down around him. From that moment on, he was changed. No longer his parents’ son, Jongdae belonged to someone else entirely. He was adopted – that was what they said. Now, even surrounded by people who are supposedly the same, he feels lost. Adrift, like he’s meant for something else. Then there’s you. You make him feel alive, wanted in a way he’s never understood. 

One Shot by @knockknocksoosthere - [ the week of 11 / 5 -  11 / 11 ]

Originally posted by dazzlingkai


Meet the next generation of superheroes. (Prompt from Anonymous xx)

On Jay Z

This Jay Z stuff got me thinking about falling in love young and being so in love with a man that you let him hurt you over and over. When you’re on the outside of a situation like that, it’s easy to be like “I’m never ever gonna let a man play me like that!!!” but damn, sometimes you get caught up and don’t even realize how you loving him so much gives him wiggle room to use that against you and get away with bullshit.

I’m ODEE in love with a person who has broken my heart twice before because he wasn’t ready and needed to grow; it really be like that sometimes. We’re young, we’re growing, we’re learning. We had to do that separately. Things are still up in the air but I find comfort in the fact that we’re too young right now to have settled down right away anyway.

What is different from my situation and HORRIFYING to me thinking deeply about what Jay Z represents on a grander scale, is how he dated her in her youth, married her, and repeatedly spat all over their marriage during his “growing pains” and now, when he is approaching his 50s, is saying “I was young and immature and I’ve grown now that I have children!”.

Stuff like this is why marriage kills women early and extends men’s lives.

ok but hear me out

richie sneaks into eddie’s house every night, WE KNOW THIS

but… one morning he forgets to sneak out before mrs k wakes up so he’s gonna just quickly take a shower in the upstairs bathroom before they go to school, hoping that mrs k doesn’t notice him before she goes to work

but mrs k forgets something at home so she COMES BACK and goes upstairs and is like 

eddie? have you seen (this thing)? and eddie is just finished brushing his teeth in the bathroom while richie is taking a shower, so mrs k hears the water running and is like??

when she comes closer to the bathroom eddie has no choice but to get in the shower with richie, FULLY CLOTHED, putting his hand over richies mouth to keep him from talking, and going SORRY MOM I’M IN THE SHOWER I CAN’T HELP

and it’s awkward but richie secretly loves it while eddie is horrified and blushing

Thoughts on OITNB Season 5

The Good:

  • This season was a lot of fun. I never felt bored, and the pacing was just right. They made roughly four days (I think?) last 13 episodes, but I don’t feel as though anything was dragged out.
  • Red on speed was fucking hilarious. So many great lines out of her this season. “In Russia, we don’t have proverbs. We have vodka and misery.”
  • Young Red back story!
  • Soso’s memorial to Poussey.
  • The subtle social commentary/anti-gun message in the premiere, where every time someone asked/talked about the gunfire a different American mass shooting was referenced. Needless to say, there was a lot.
  • Taystee taking the fucking microphone from Judy King. 
  • Taystee repeating Poussey’s name over and over. Punching Caputo in the face for not doing so. A+
  • Taystee as a whole was pretty amazing this season, even if she eventually screwed everything up.
  • Linda becoming Boo’s girlfriend for five minutes but then ultimately getting completely fucked over.
  • Piper and Alex sticking mostly to mundane couple issues. Nothing hugely earth-shattering between the two of them. I was sick of the constant forced drama.
  • I feel like Piper made actual progress with her mother, and the fact that particular conversation lead to her impromptu proposal was awesome.
  • Nicky was clean, hilarious, and hot as hell. Couldn’t get enough of her this season, and loved seeing the real depths of her feelings for Lorna. The brief role reversal with her and Red was a fun trip as well.
  • Red and Blanca friendship was an unexpected treat.
  • FRIEDA
  • I could not love Gloria Mendoza more if I tried.
  • Alison was fleshed out, and I’m really starting to love her as a character.
  • Piper being a Slytherin, headcanon confirmed. 
  • Caputo being a badass in his negotiations with Fig. 
  • Chang peacing out. 
  • Ending the season with The Cinematic Orchestra’s “To Build a Home” – a better song choice doesn’t exist. I have always associated that song with this show. Bravo. The last five minutes gave me chills.
  • Cindy singing Suzanne to sleep, then later Cindy hugging Suzanne, apologizing, crying. I loved it.

The Bad:

  • I feel like the overall message with Suzanne was scattered and poorly handled, and while Uzo did an amazing job with what she was given, I feel like the writing wasn’t necessarily realistic in that it hasn’t been tackled what exactly Suzanne’s mental illness is, purely so the writers can twist her symptoms to fit the plot.
  • Unlike most people I’m not mad about the Piscatella back-story, but it felt incomplete to me. I feel like there is not enough explanation there. What happened to Wes? It seemed like given some of what Piscatella said that there must have been some kind of betrayal there. Given that he’s dead, we’ll probably never find out, but I just felt like there were pieces missing to his story.
  • I feel like Daya fell flat this season. Her characterization was all over the place until she gave herself up and quietly disappeared. 
  • Vinnie and Lorna are, as always, the cringiest. I guess that’s sort of the point, though.
  • I’m not sure what they were trying to do with the Nazis/Sankey? I don’t know if they were trying to endear us to them, but it felt…weird. Like their racism was purely situational and just seemed to disappear when it was convenient. I feel uncomfortable that they were played in a way that I wanted to like them, then felt horrified because Jesus, they’re FUCKING NAZIS
  • Black Lattes Matter would never be a meme
  • Sophia disappearing halfway through the season. Seriously? Her helping in medical was awesome. I would’ve loved to have seen more of that.

The Ugly:

  • Coates x Pennsatucky makes my fucking skin crawl. How can this be a thing? Why is this a thing? WHY IS SHE PAIRED WITH HER RAPIST AND WHY IS IT PORTRAYED AS CUTE?
  • The general rapeyness of how most of the male hostages were treated, mainly Stratman, Josh, and Luschyek. It dehumanized a lot of the girls for me and made me really uncomfortable.
  • Adding onto that: Angie and Leanne have become way too much. “I’ve raped guys before, and I could tell that was genuine.” What the fuck? Why did this need to be in there? I don’t understand how we are ever supposed to have any sympathy for these two ever again. Which is a shame with Leanne, because she has one of the more interesting back stories on the show.
  • Watching the guy who raped Wes Driscoll get burned alive was something I could’ve done without seeing. Hearing his screams would’ve been enough to get the point across.
  • Humps was creepy when he was alive, creepy when he was dying, and creepy upon death. Not sad to see him go. 
  • Piscatella torturing Red in front of her girls…Alex’s arm getting snapped…that whole episode was amazingly handled, but it was still really difficult to watch.
  • Caputo getting trapped in the POO for so long was really gross and disturbing. The man was literally locked in a piss/shit/puke filled porta-potty for days in what I’m pretty sure is summer or early autumn. 
  • Seriously, all of those guards are going to be permanently traumatized. What they were put through is sick.

TL;DR: This has been one of my favorite seasons yet, fun and brilliant, even if there’s an unfortunate amount of it I desperately wish I could un-see, and I feel some of it should have been handled differently. 

Another Humans are Wierd thing

We literally get together to chew.
We consider it socially beneficial to participate in chewing together. It has been a frequent topic of scientific investigation and is suggested that it not only help us form bonds but can increase our intellectual success? In fact, we like getting together and chewing so much we consider it an important, romantic, and high form of friendship and courting? Like going out on a date is taking someone to go chew some nice food with you.
Why is this so important to us? Why is it socially acceptable, and beneficial even, to sit together in groups, large or small, and chew?
Would other species consider it rude, disgusting even, to eat, chew, or take in necessary living substances in whichever way they do, in the company of others?

Alien: ugh, how can your species suffer the immense noises you make?
Human: we don’t really think about it, it’s more of like a ‘communal chewing’ thing which nobody really cares about
Alien: but isn’t it…rude?
Human: What? No, only if you do it with your mouth open.
Alien: but…you must open your mouth to eat, mustn’t you?
Human: Well, yeah, but-
Alien: Then is not eating in front of others rude?
Human: No, no! We’re encouraged to do it!
Alien: but you just said-
Human: I know, but it’s a popular form of social activity! People are more likely to come along to things if there’s food. You know, it’s the only way I could ever convince my friend to come out with me hahah
Alien:…

Also if like, for one species it’s actually similar to torture to be forced to consume things in front of or with others, so they make their humans a huge feast and they all have to eat it together, assuming they would be horrified, but then…
*dead silence*
EveryONE IN THE ROOM TEARS INTO THE FOOD WITH RECKLESS ABANDON. THE ALIENS LOOK ON WITH HORROR.

It gets worse when a food fight ensues.

Things I Love about Wonder Woman

- Little Diana. Basically every scene with little Diana

- The fact that there are Amazons with different race, age, and body type

- the training montage

- “I’m going, Mother”

- “Who would I be if I stay?”

- The sex talk. “Men are important in procreation, but for pleasure, unnecessary.” And Steve’s reaction to that.

- “To the war!”

- The horrified look that one lady gives Diana when she’s trying out outfits

- the fact that war is shown to be bloody, horrifying, and painful

- Diana’s team is not all white. There’s native American and Latino. And the white one is Scottish

- The entire No Man’s Land scene

- “That’s what I’m going to do”

- PTSD, racism, and colonialism is shown. Not just a mention of it, but showing what those can do to people and the effects of those.

- Diana checking out that woman’s size. I love how this shoes that not all women have the same size. I love how this shows that a dress that might fit one, doesn’t necessarily means it would fit others.

- Diana’s realization that humans does horrible things by themselves, not because of Ares’ influence, and her refusing to fight because of that

- Steve’s sacrifice

-Diana’s compassion for dr. Poison

- “Goodbye, Brother”

- That last scene of Diana flying out

- The fact that I didn’t have to see women being sexualized in this movie

- The fact that Diana can be strong, beautiful, smart, and powerful without a man being better than her and the fact that this movie made me realize that women, that I, can be strong, beautiful, smart, and powerful

some villainous concepts/headcanons:

  • Black Hat is a master of all things classical and occult but modern technology is mostly lost on him and he doesn’t care, if you handed him a smartphone he might eat it
  • Dr Flug has an infinite amount of paper bags so that if you remove one you find another and another onwards indefinitely, he can sometimes be found cutting the eye holes out of spares
  • Demencia knew and fell for Black Hat before he knew she even existed
  • Black Hat sometimes shouts random accusatory statements when surprised to play it off like he’s offended and not caught off guard, I.E. “HOW DARE YOU ENTER HERE UNINVITED”
  • Demencia’s job is bodyguard/guard dog, her obsession with BH assures she will fight to protect him or at the very least unwittingly notify him of a potential threat
  • Dr. Flug is a normal human evil-intern-turned-one-man-product-development-department with a family who still wants to see him for the holidays and pester him about his job and his love life
  • Black Hat hoards random nonsense spooky/twisted Victorian things, like taxidermied animals stood up like people and fencing each other or broken chandeliers
  • Dr. Flug can get motion sick, potentially due to his partially obscured vision (paper bag + goggles)
  • Black Hat talks in his sleep but only in horrifying otherworldly tongues of the dark whisperer
  • “DEMENCIA’S EATING THE NEIGHBOR’S PETUNIAS AGAIN”
  • Black Hat is never seen without a hat, preferably black.
  • Dr Flug finds every possible opportunity to retaliate against BH’s torment in quiet and humble ways that won’t get his butt kicked, such as “he asked for 4 ice cubes but I gave him FIVE!! MWAHAHHAHA! HIS DRINK WILL BE ALL WATERY!” 
  • Black Hat does not require mortal sustenance but sometimes eats/drinks just because he can
  • Demencia is closer to chaotic neutral than true evil but let’s just let her have this
  • Black Hat takes offense to implications that he doesn’t understand something and will not ask for help; “OF COURSE I KNOW HOW TO EAT AN EGG” *swallows the raw egg whole*
  • “DR. FLUG THE WI-FI IS OUT”