this song has been eating away at me

April 7th.

Authors Note: Sooo I wrote this and then it deleted so I had to re-write it and to be honest the first draft was 100 times better, but it is whatever! 
Harry’s debut single is about to drop in a few hours: If my list is correct and the single hasn’t been released early. (This post is scheduled so if the song was released early. Ooops). 


You had gotten used to waking up at various hours to an empty bed, but you had hoped the emptiness wouldn’t be a thing while in New York. 

With dreary eyes, you look at the empty space beside you, the hotel room still darkened by the hour, the linen sheets draping around your body as you gradually sit up in the California King bed. With a heavy yawn, you pull your body from the softness of the sheets, forcing yourself to pad towards the balcony doors. 

He has been a mess the last few months, more so the last two weeks, it has killed you to see him so out of touch with himself, he has poured all his energy into this new development of his that he has managed to forget how to properly sleep. 

You and Harry arrived in New York in the early morning so he could prepare himself for the new step in his life, the dropping of his first single. To say the least, the hype is hurting him more than his own fans, the anticipation is killing him.

You reach for one of his jackets draped over the hotel chair and you pull it up your arms before you step outside onto the balcony where he is leaning against the railing, his arms pressed to the railing, his back slightly arched. 

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A Little Too Much | c.h

this song hurts my heart 

I M A G I N E 

Sun poured itself into the newly renovated kitchen. Ornate on the white tiled ground were shattered pieces of glass, sources that include cups, plates, and a vase. Sink was wooshing with running water, hearing as the pipes swallowed it and sent it to the scariness that was the sewers. The only other sound beside it was the whistling kettle that was searing behind you. 

“A-Andrew, please–!” You whimper, your hands trembling from pure fear. Inches before you was your boyfriend, his cherry face blurred by the tears coating your eyes. You wanted nothing more than to hug that boy, but knew that the idea was far too audacious now. 

“Why the fuck were you at your mothers this weekend?” Andrew growled, his voice hoarse and stern. He slammed his hand on the counter when you remained mute, having you flinch from the sound of the impact. “Answer me, Y/N!” 

“I-I…” You stuttered, too scared to utter any sort of words. The entire situation was comprehensible, and you could barely say a thing. “Sh-she wanted to s-see me, s-s-so I visited the h-house for a bit…” 

“So why did you fucking tell me?” Andrew roared, having you desperate to run from the house as soon as possible. 

“B-because you work so much and hard, I d-didn’t want to di-disturb you…” You cried out, your words barely coming out as a whisper as you hugged yourself. Goosebumps full of fear crawled up and down your arms, feeling your hands tremble in your armpits as you did. 

“You’re such an idiot, Y/N…” Andrew said lowly. “…You deserve to be punished.” Those words jabbed straight to your heart. You blinked a few times, allowing your tears to stream down your cheeks in exchange for clear vision. But your pupils dilated, seeing as your boyfriend’s arm was raised in the air. Slowly, he clenched his hand into a fist, revealing those strong brass knuckles of his. Shutting your eyes once more, you waited for the impact to just–

Punch!


“Miss? Miss!” Voices surged into your head as you quickly refocused yourself. You looked up dizzily, your hands touching the concrete as you felt a sudden throb on your bottom. Your sight was now full of worried stares from strangers. “Are you alright, Miss?” 

“Mm, I am,” you hummed, taking the offered hand from said voice as you were lifted back onto your feet. A woman beside you had offered your phone and items you held, having you take it graciously as you looked around. 

“D’you want me to call anyone?” The man asked, a few bystanders walking away to see the few that remained handle the situation. You nodded your head no, touching your forehead with your hand. You moved a few strands of hair from your face, having the worried faces enlarge their pupils from the motion. 

“Hey, you’re the girl from the news!” A woman exclaimed, pointing at the bandaged wound on your upper cheek. You brought up a trembling hand and touched the bandage, having your heart race from recalling the sudden memory. “What are you doing outside on your own? You should be getting some therapy for that scary experience!” 

“I’m okay,” you said simply, giving them a soft, painful smile as you dusting yourself off. You thanked the worried bystanders before turning around and making you way to home. The people called out softly, offering assistance that you easily ignored. 

It’s been one whole month since the assault. The wound remained damaged, the cut deep into the skull. A bruise purple and blue, like space, had danced around the cut painfully. But there was no more pain emitting from the very thing. Just fear. 

Help was continuously shot to you, having you turn them down with ease. You parents, relatives, friends of all sorts were yearning to give you a hand. But you were far too stubborn, subconsciously flaunting the toughness that resided in your. You hadn’t needed help, but you couldn’t avoid the sadness that dispersed with your sudden loneliness. 

Half of that month was spent weaving your life back together. You went back to work right after your release from the hospital. You were quick to sell the home that once homed two connected hearts. Crawling into a small apartment, you worked long hours to keep yourself distracted. But flashbacks like the ones that occurred can’t help but break your focus. 

Not even you knew if you were ever going to get better. You were on your two feet, but you weren’t standing up perfectly. You were breathing, but you weren’t alive. You were living without actually living. 

‘She’s so strong, isn’t she?’ Voices of many would replay in your mind. Your stubbornness was seen as some sort of strength, which you have kept with for too many days on your own. As much as you wanted to cut it out, you couldn’t. This was your problem, and you believed you hand to deal with it on your own. 

Until Calum Hood showed up into your life. 

Arriving to your apartment, you jingled your keys from your pocket and opened the door, revealing yourself to the gentle scent of coconut oil and vanilla candles. But, you were also suddenly introduced to your patient boyfriend. 

“Y/N!” Calum’s voice rang, having you softly smile at the tall bassist. His torso was hugged in a black baseball shirt, with cotton black pajamas to cover his legs. His raven locks were a mess, likely the case that he just woke up. Or, like he usually does, refuses to fix himself up as he wandered around the small house. His feet were swallowed up by two different socks, one with stripes and the other with polka dots. 

“Calum, did you just wake up?” You asked softly, still outside the doorway as he nodded happily. 

“Like 20 minutes ago,” Calum said with a grin. “I checked the time and knew you were coming soon, so I waited to see you, love.” You smiled, your heart warming to see the gentle being before you. His eyes proved how much he missed you, those pupils enlarging to show how happy he was. 

“You didn’t have to…” You whispered. 

“But I wanted to,” Calum insisted, his eyes gleaming at you. Just watching Calum and hearing his words made you feel warm. He was always so content to see you and handled you with such care. With him, everything was slow and nice, easing emotions into you with no rush. 

When you first met Calum, he was the dolt who managed to drop coffee on your thigh. You watched as the nervous boy fret about it, grabbing several Dunkin Donuts napkins and dabbing your burning thigh. But the pain hadn’t occurred to you once you listened to his worried accent and large almond eyes. 

“Stop standing outside already,” Calum began, offering his large hand out to you. You felt your heart bounce with emotion, seeing his offer as one of the biggest things. He was welcoming you, wanting your existence around without forcing you or pulling you in. It was just a simple hand gesture and it slowly began to mean the world. “Come home.” 

Instantly, you rushed into the doorway and grabbed the boy into your arms. Your fingers grabbed the back of his shirt tightly, feeling the fabric bend between your fingers. You felt your body relax itself from his simple touch, feeling warmth disperse all over you. And, without question, he wrapped his arms around you, knowing why you did what you did. 

“It’s okay now,” Calum cooed, his hand patting your head as he held you. “I’m here now. I’m here, and everything with clear up. I promise.” 

His words felt true. Everything he has ever uttered to you has never gone back. Even with two weeks knowing this boy, you felt so safe around him. It only took him a week to get a kiss from you, and another just to stay in your house. All the scary stuff clears away like fog once he was in the picture. 

“I like you,” you mumbled into his chest, feeling bad that ‘like’ has yet to upgrade to ‘love.’ But you knew he was so incredibly close. With such little time, he has saved you from yourself, and you couldn’t have been any more gracious. From writing you songs to taking you out for dinner on a yacht. He introduced you to Vegemite and bands like All Time Low. Both their music and the actual band. He became the light of your life, saving you from the dark oblivion that was near close to consume you whole. 

“I like you, more,” Calum mumbled, pulling you away to plant a gentle kiss on your wound. “Now, let me make you something to eat, yeah? Our package of Vegemite finally came in.” 

“You’re going to get sick of that stuff someday,” you humored, keeping your tears in as he closed the front door and led you into the kitchen. 

“Sick of that delicious black spread?” Calum began with a smirk. “Someone would have to take my life before that happens.” You giggled, playfully shoving him as he held your hand and led you to eat. 

anonymous asked:

I think they're just lucky gp don't care about timelines. They stream/buy a song because they like it and if it has a cute story behind even better (I do that when I hear a song I like and I don't know who the artist is).So they don't care if he has ever been in Amsterdam or if he had a girlfriend who has now been erased from his life. His team know that and they know that even though we care/know what the truth is we'll always be on his side fighting for him to have the recognition he deserves.

you are absolutely correct (although i would interchange ‘lucky’ with ‘aware’ in that first sentence). but like i said in my last post - and people in the tags expressed this way better than i was able to - that’s not the faulty part of the strategy. the faulty part is milking this fandom dry without the reward and giving us whiplash to the point where ‘always [being] on his side’ becomes this very big responsibility that less and less people are able to juggle, be it because of their real life jobs or other circumstances.

anonymous asked:

If MC were ever in a severe accident and dying on the hospital bed, how would she spend her last days with each of the characters? ((Dark I know, but I'm curious and I like your writing ^^))

this makes me sad but god knows i love being sad so 

WARNING THIS IS SAD AS SHIT NMY ROOMMATE ALMOST CRIED READING ALL OF THEM PLS LOVE YOURSELF

Yoosung

  • when he heard MC was hospitalized he ran out of class
  • MC was in surgery when he got the hospital
  • sitting in wait made Yoosung so anxious he thought he might vomit
  • so he buys MC a few things from the hospital gift shop
  • the biggest teddy bear in stock, also the biggest bouquet of flowers, and the biggest heart balloon
  • so Yoosung sits and waits again, now with a giant teddy bear, flowers, and a balloon
  • he’s ready to make MC feel every ounce of his love for them
  • he waits for an hour
  • and one hour turns into two
  • and two turns into three
  • until finally a doctor emerges from the room
  • “are you a family member?”
  • “I’m MC’s boyfriend! how are they doing?”
  • Yoosung tries to retain a positive disposition
  • “I’m very sorry…”
  • very sorry?
  • before the doctor even finishes his sentence, tears start to build up in Yoosungs eyes
  • no…
  • no, please
  • this can’t be happening
  • apparently the surgery didn’t go well..
  • and MC only has a few days left
  • Yoosung runs to the nearest bathroom and locks himself in a stall, tears streaming down his face
  • no no no no no no no no
  • he sobs aloud, unable to hold in the crushing pain of his reality
  • Yoosung doesn’t know if he can handle losing another loved one
  • he’d just finished getting over Rika’s death and now
  • he was going to lose the person most important to him
  • but…he can’t let MC leave the world like Rika did, covered with darkness
  • he wants MC’s last memories to be everything that is bright and pure
  • Yoosung will make sure that the way MC leaves this world won’t be remembered as sad, but as an ending just as shining and happy as they made everyone around them
  • he spends every waking moment with MC
  • “Yoosung, you should be in class now”
  • “MC..im not going to leave you”
  • one morning when MC wakes up, their room is decorated with streamers and balloons, and Yoosung is sitting in bed next to them, reading a book
  • he brightens up when he sees theyre awake
  • “happy birthday, baby! i brought you a whole cake”
  • “Yoosung..? it’s not my birthday”
  • MC rubs the sleep out of their eyes
  • “i know that, silly. we’re celebrating your half birthday today!”
  • MC laughs at Yoosung
  • at that moment, Seven parades into the room, followed by Zen, Jumin, and Jaehee
  • “Happy half birthday, MC!”
  • MC gasps with happiness when they see all their friends come into the room
  • V says that when Rika died she felt alone….
  • and after Rika was gone, Yoosung felt alone
  • to feel “alone,” Yoosung thinks, is like being punched in the gut every second of everyday
  • MC should never have to feel alone
  • even though Yoosung would be lonely without MC
  • he wants them to feel the joy of company, of love, of friends
  • for every second until they leave this world

Zen

  • its all my fault
  • Zen took MC out on his motorcycle that day
  • while the were riding a car pulled out, hitting the motorcycle
  • but the car only hit the back end of the motorcycle
  • where MC was sitting
  • Zen was scraped up, but not nearly as bad as MC
  • he held their hand in the ambulance on the way to the hospital, apologizing the whole way
  • even though MC was unconscious
  • its all my fault
  • im such an idiot
  • its all my fault
  • Zen continues to beat himself up while MC is being taken care of by the doctors
  • when he hears the news that MC only has a few days left
  • things get even darker inside his mind
  • you killed them you killed them you killed them you killed them
  • he cant even go inside MC’s room to visit them
  • Zen doesnt think he can handle looking into the face of the person he killed
  • especially when that person is also the love of his life
  • everything grows black inside his mind in that hospital hall
  • he just stands in front of the door to MC’s room
  • wishing he was strong enough to go inside and comfort them
  • but how can he be of any comfort..
  • when it’s all his fault
  • “Zen…are you out there?”
  • MC’s voice reaches Zen through the door
  • he freezes at the sound of their voice, unable to breathe
  • “please come in here, Zen..”
  • he takes a deep breath and opens the door slowly, choking back tears
  • he wants to apologize, but where can he start?
  • how do you apologize for killing someone?
  • “Zen, please dont blame yourself”
  • MC speaks as if they had read Zen’s mind
  • “Zen…when i’m gone..”
  • “stop”
  • Zen rushes to MC and kisses them suddenly
  • “you’ll never be gone, MC. you’ll be in my heart forever and ever”
  • MC kisses Zen back, pulling him in close
  • “you have to give your career all you’ve got. never give up, for me. okay?”
  • “never”
  • Zen was amazed that even in their last days, MC was still supporting him
  • he doesnt deserve them
  • MC pulls Zen close again, kissing him
  • after the kiss, Zen speaks softly to MC without pulling his lips away from theirs
  • “will you let me spend the rest of your life with you?”
  • “of course”
  • Zen spends every second with MC in the hospital 
  • everytime they fall asleep he is right next to them
  • and everytime they wake up he’s there to kiss them
  • he even eats hospital food with MC
  • and when pain keeps MC awake at night he sings to them
  • he wonders if the last thing MC hears will be his voice
  • he wants MC to hear his song in heaven
  • and listen to his lullabies until they can be together again

Jaehee

  • MC has been in the hospital for a few days now since they were in a severe car accident
  • and every day Jaehee will go visit them to check up on how MC is doing
  • Jaehee always thought that MC would be able to recover from the accident just fine…
  • today when Jaehee walks into MC’s room, the doctor is there talking to them
  • as Jaehee enters the room, the conversation between MC and the doctor comes to a halt, and they both look at her
  • “I’ll leave you two alone, now…im so sorry”
  • the doctor excuses himself from the room
  • well…that doesn’t sound good
  • as soon as the door closes behind the doctor, MC lifts both hands to their face, crying into them
  • Jaehee rushes to their side
  • “MC, what is it? whats wrong?”
  • MC doesn’t answer, they just continue to cry
  • Jaehee sits next to MC on the bed and pulls them into her, wrapping her arms around them
  • they sit like that for around ten minutes, Jaehee holding MC while their frail body shakes with sobs
  • finally MC is able to form words, although their speech is significantly broken up
  • “Jaehee…i’m g-going to die…”
  • ..what?
  • “th-the doctor just t-told me..”
  • MC can barley get the words out at the moment
  • shhh…it’s going to be okay”
  • Jaehee stops MC from trying to explain any further
  • as Jaehee holds MC she too starts to cry, her face heating up as the warm tears roll down her cheeks
  • is MC…really going to die? 
  • the thought makes Jaehee pull MC even closer to her
  • Jaehee…loves MC
  • she cant believe she’s almost out of time…
  • Jaehee curses herself now, feeling like she wasted so much time
  • “MC….can i tell you something?”
  • MC nods, still unable to speak
  • Jaehee moves away from MC a little so she can look them in the eyes
  • “I love you”
  • MC looks up at Jaehee, their eyes red from crying
  • “I love you too, Jaehee”
  • as MC says this a single tear rolls down they cheek, and Jaehee wipes it away
  • Jaehee leans toward MC slowly, kissing them
  • MC returns the kiss, lifting a hand to Jaehee’s face
  • Jaehee pulls MC closer to her again as they kiss
  • Jaehee wishes she had done that months and months ago
  • they could have lived together so happily
  • maybe if Jaehee had asked MC to be with her…
  • this never would have happened 
  • the regret building up inside of Jaehee is strong enough to make her sick
  • but she can’t let that control her last days with MC
  • Jaehee continues to kiss MC, feeling a wetness on their lips from tears that never stopped falling
  • she wants to kiss MC for hours and hours
  • to make up for all the time she spent hiding her feelings
  • when Jaehee finally pulls away, she is hardly able to talk either
  • “MC…will you go on a date with me?”
  • MC smiles a little, still sniffing
  • “Jaehee, i cant leave the hospital”
  • “don’t worry about that”
  • Jaehee kisses MC again
  • “get some rest and when you wake up, we’ll have our date. okay?”
  • “Jaehee, i dont want to rest. i dont want to lose any more time with you”
  • it hurts Jaehee more than anything to leave MC, but she continues to insist that MC sleep for a little
  • “I’ll be here when you wake up”
  • and when MC woke up, Jaehee was there as promised
  • along with a small table and two chairs
  • in the center of the table were a few red candles that filled the room with the scent of warm vanilla
  • the two plates sitting on the table already had food on them
  • Jaehee wore a short dark blue dress that tied behind her neck, halter style
  • “Jaehee…you look stunning”
  • MC sits up slowly, soaking in the beautiful scene and the soft aroma
  • “care to join me, darling?”
  • MC blushes when Jaehee calls them darling
  • so Jaehee and MC enjoy a meal together that night at the hospital 
  • Jaehee in her dress, MC in their hospital gown
  • Jaehee talks about the first time she realized she loved MC
  • and how she wished she could kiss them and tell them how she felt
  • but she was always so nervous and it was hard for Jaehee to sort out her feelings, back then
  • when the “dinner” is over, Jaehee blows out the candles she had lit in the room
  • Jaehee helps MC into bed
  • “Jaehee…will you stay here with me tonight?”
  • Jaehee kisses MC as she pulls a blanket over them
  • “I will never leave you again”
  • MC’s last night is spent in Jaehee’s arms
  • where they always wanted to be

Jumin

  • Jumin is in a conference when he gets a call from an unknown number
  • normally he doesn’t take calls during meetings, but decides to excuse himself from the room 
  • “Is this Jumin Han?”
  • “Yes”
  • “MC is at the hospital right now, they told us to contact you”
  • Jumin’s eyes widen
  • MC is hurt??
  • “is it serious?”
  • “I’m afraid so”
  • Jumin hangs up the phone and leaves for the hospital without finishing the meeting
  • when he arrives at the hospital the doctor is in the lobby waiting to greet him
  • “Mr. Han…i think you should sit down for a moment”
  • “I need to see MC now”
  • “Mr. Han i have to tell you something”
  • when Jumin hears that MC only has a few days left…he’s too shocked to even cry
  • he just stares at the ground
  • still as a statue
  • isnt it amazing how someone’s entire life can be ripped to shreds in a matter of minutes
  • without MC…
  • Jumin can already feel himself going insane
  • it’s not until Jumin sees MC quietly sleeping in their hospital bed that he starts to cry
  • he always thought they looked to cute when they were asleep
  • he didn’t think it was possible to take the way someones chest rose and fell for granted
  • but now he feels like he had
  • he wished he spent every night with MC just watching them sleep
  • because soon MC will rest their eyes
  • but their chest wont rise and fall in the same familiar way
  • he wont be able to feel their warm breath on his face, inches away from his own
  • or feel their heart beat in rhythm with his
  • Jumin cries for what seems like hours before MC wakes up
  • “Jumin…i’m glad to see you”
  • Jumin kisses MC’s hand
  • “did the doctor tell you-”
  • “yes, my love, i know everything”
  • MC opens their mouth to speak, but Jumin starts again before they can say anything
  • “let me grant you a wish”
  • “….what?”
  • “i can give you anything you want, MC. we can even leave this hospital if that’s what you desire”
  • “Jumin, you are my wish”
  • Jumin tries to shove away the pain pounding in his head
  • “let me do this one last thing for you, my darling”
  • MC tries to tell Jumin they don’t need anything except for him
  • but Jumin desires so desperately to grant their wish
  • he wants to give them everything in the world
  • because once they’re gone…
  • his will be so empty
  • “Paris”
  • “you want to see Paris?”
  • “i want to go to the most romantic place on the planet with the man I love”
  • withing hours MC and Jumin are on a private plane to Paris, despite the doctors advice for MC to stay in bed
  • MC has to use crutches and their arms still have bandages on them
  • but to jumin, MC is still the most beautiful human on the planet
  • they enjoy everything Paris has to offer
  • they even see the Eiffel tower
  • looking at MC under the lights of the city…
  • Jumin feels lucky to have such beautiful memories of MC as his last
  • they watch fireworks together and enjoy a fancy dinner, bandages and all
  • Jumin even wears his arm in a sling to dinner when MC feels embarrassed about looking so ragged
  • even though Jumin is going to lose MC
  • he feels happy that he could make a dream of theirs come true
  • just like they made all of his dreams come true  

707

  • Seven was MC’s emergency contact
  • when he got there MC was still asleep
  • he was told the news before MC even woke up
  • he was just sitting by their bedside, holding their hand
  • watching as their chest moved up and down
  • the perfect picture of peace
  • his peace
  • the doctor came in while MC was still sleeping
  • “Sir….i have to tell you something. please come outside with me”
  • Seven hates the idea of not being at MC’s side for even a second
  • what if they wake up?
  • he has to be there when they wake up
  • “Sir”
  • Seven joins the doctor in the hallway
  • when he’s told that MC will die in a few days
  • he can’t stop the anger from rising in him
  • Seven starts to yell at the doctor in the hallway, his mental state unhinged 
  • “what the hell are you here for if you can’t save them?!”
  • “sir, please calm down”
  • Seven has to leave the building to collect his thoughts
  • this can’t be real
  • he slams his fists against the outside wall of the building, shouting at no one
  • “No! You have to save them!”
  • he continues to yell and pound on the wall, tears starting to stream down his face
  • “they…you have to…i need them…”
  • he slides down, crumpling on the floor as his yelling regresses into whispers
  • i need them…
  • Seven thought about his life with MC everyday
  • they saved him from his dark world…
  • they ended his pain
  • even through him pushing them away
  • MC showed him the light
  • he wasnt ready to go back into darkness
  • “please…save my light…”
  • Seven sits outside with his back against the wall of the building, sobbing into his hands and talking to no one
  • they were gonna have a life together
  • he wanted to marry them and have kids and grand kids and spend 80 years just by their side
  • now…it’s all ending so soon
  • but Seven can’t cry away his last moments with MC 
  • he wants to spend every second by their side
  • starting now
  • Seven lifts his glasses up to rub the tears away from his eyes and brushes his hoodie off
  • when Seven returns to MC’s room they’re still sleeping soundly
  • thank goodness
  • this time instead of sitting by MC’s bedside, he sits next to them on the hospital bed
  • from beside them he watches MC sleep
  • tears build up in his eyes again, but he forces them away
  • enjoy this time
  • make the most of this
  • when MC’s eyes finally flutter open, Seven feels like his heart is going to implode
  • “hey there, sleeping beauty”
  • “Seven…”
  • MC gives Seven a tired smile and tries to sit up, but they start to feel an intense pain
  • Seven sees MC’s face twist and insists they lay back down
  • “i’m sorry about all this, Seven…”
  • “don’t be worried, hot stuff. i’ll stay by your side until you’re all healed up. okay?”
  • he wants to act normal in front of MC, pushing down the lump in his throat that forms when he thinks about their inevitable fate
  • MC grabs onto Sevens arm and smiles, cuddling up to him
  • “okay…”
  • MC closes their eyes to nod off again
  • after about an hour, when Seven is sure MC is asleep, he decides to leave the hospital for a bit
  • i’ll make sure you never feel sad. i’ll make youre happy until your last moments on this earth…by taking you away from earth
  • i’ll make your world as bright as you made mine
  • when MC wakes up again Seven is standing in the middle of the room, wearing a big smile
  • he’s dressed in a tuxedo
  •  it’s night time now, so the whole room is dark
  • except for a field of stars on the ceiling, bring projected from a special lamp next to MC’s bed
  • a few planets are hanging from the ceiling by strings
  • MC spots earth, jupiter, saturn, and a few others including the moon
  • “Seven….whats this..?”
  • Seven walks over to MC, taking their hands in his and kneeling down on one knee
  • “will you…marry me in the space station?”
  • MC smiles, giggling a little
  • “Seven, you know I will! but…”
  • MC leans in close to Seven, whispering in his ear
  • “this isn’t the space station”
  • “why, of course it is!” 
  • Seven stands and gestures to the ceiling
  • “look at all of the stars! and look, we can even see earth from here!”
  • MC laughs more, clutching their stomach
  • “how about we get married when i’m not being hospitalized?”
  • “I can’t wait that long and well, i only booked the space station for one night.”
  • Seven returns to his kneeling position
  • “so…marry me? please?”
  • “okay, Seven”
  • MC smiles sweetly at him as they answer
  • at that moment Seven lets a priest into the room that was waiting outside
  • and they have a small private ceremony in the space station
  • “you may now kiss the bride”
  • Seven has to lean down to MC to kiss them
  • “i love you, Seven”
  • “I love you too. more than i can ever say”
  • Seven never tells MC that they’re going to die
  • he wants them to look forward to spending a lifetime with him
  • he wants them to know how badly he wanted to make them his forever
  • to MC, they will spend a life together and have kids and grand kids
  • the next few days Seven spends as MC’s husband are the best of his life
  • and when MC passes
  • Seven hopes that when he meets MC in heaven
  • they’ll still be married

this is mega angsty hope u hated liked it <3

headcanon requests?

Day 54
letlive.
Day 54

To all my friends you’re all gonna die

and I’ll be stuck never wondering why

I ain’t sad. I’m more so upset

it was such a selfish manner in which all of you left

I talked to god, he saved you some grace

not to count up all the time that you wasted

you cheated death and that’s ok

but according to his watch you were already late

to question god is to question my faith

but heaven seems like such a questionable place (it is)

but while I’m here I know I’m alive

and it hurts me to know that you’re all gonna die

to all my friends you’ve already died

and I am stuck wondering why

see I ain’t mad, and I ain’t upset

because I’m the closest thing to sainthood you never will get

I talked to god, he saved you a place

a spot too far for you to spit in his face because

I never asked for you to believe

I just asked for you to say ‘goodbye’, before you leave

I hate say, ‘I told you so’

‘I told you so’

our memories at discount rates

still we can’t afford it

I believe in something so I hope you’re going somewhere

to all my friends who’d rather get high

I’ll be at ground level watching you die

fuck drugs and fuck straight edge

those are both the things that got the best of my friends

and to all the girls that make it a trend

to fuck all of my friends

we’ll all die of the same disease

whether you got it in bed or you got it on your knees

can’t wait to say, ‘I told you so’

I told you so

the boulder on my back has been washed away

the worst part is, I don’t miss the weight

the tide is high and they’re washing face

within the sea of time pissed away

the boulder on my back has been washed away

the worst part is I don’t miss the weight

when the tide is high I’ll watch them sink

into the sea of misery

to all my friends this is the end

I’ll leave you six feet under with those shit eating grins

to all my friends this is the end

and this is way more important than that bullshit with ben

to all my friends who’d rather be dead

I refuse to let you leave without this song in your head

all our memories, all at discount rates

None of this belongs to me; the audio and lyrics belong to the artist.

Dear Luke (Luke Imagine)

Masterlist

Dear Luke,
My mum told me that I should write to you since you’re on the other side of the world and famous now. I don’t know. But here I am, writing this anyway. I know we were never really great friends or anything, but I always thought you were kind of cool in a weird way. Probably everyone tells you that now, but I’m being honest. You’ve always been smart but not in a pretentious way, and you always seemed kind of effortlessly good at everything. Except doing your hair, that took a bit of practice, because I can remember it looking not so great a few years back. It looks nicer now.
Anyway, I’m just babbling now, but I hope writing your album is going well and I hope you remember who I am. That would be awkward if you didn’t, huh? So I don’t have much else to say. I’d say I miss you but I don’t think I know you well enough to say that. You could write back if you want to, that would be nice. See you around, Luke.
Y/N Y/L/N

Dear Y/N,
If there’s one person on the planet I never expected to get a letter from, it would be you. So colour me surprised when it arrived. Not bad surprised, just surprised. It made me happy, though. I hardly ever hear from anyone back home unless they want something from me. I mean, I guess you want a letter back from me, but whatever.
Thanks for all the backhanded compliments in your letter, they made me laugh. I’m glad you like my hair now, though. And if I’m being honest, I always thought you were kind of cool too, and I definitely haven’t forgotten who you are.
Los Angeles is a crazy city and it’s easy to get lost here, and not just physically lost, but I’m having a lot of fun. The house that we’re staying in overlooks the whole city and has a pool and everything. It’s great. The album is coming along slowly, but I’m excited for it. It’s just insane that this is happening to us, you know?
Anyway, say thanks to your mum for making you write to me. Maybe write back, tell me about your life and stuff? Good to hear from you, Y/N.
Luke Hemmings

Dear Luke,
Today I saw a photo of you in a magazine. Can you believe it?! I couldn’t.
Thanks for responding, this is a cool little pen pal thing we’ve got going on, even though I’ve known you since as long as I can remember.
It sounds like you’re having a great time in L.A. and that just makes me want to travel to America even more. I keep asking Mum if we can go there on holiday, but so far, no luck. She says the plane ride would be too long, but I think it would feel like the blink of an eye if I knew that I’d be in America at the end of the journey.
You said you wanted to know a little about my life, so here goes. I don’t know if you remember Kyle, that guy I was dating for three years, but we broke up last month, so my life has kind of changed a lot recently. I spend a lot more time alone now. I’m studying at University of Sydney, creative writing. I like it okay, but I think I’d like it more if I was somewhere else. Sometimes I just feel like I don’t belong here, you know? I got a perfect score on my first exam of the term, though. I don’t know what else to tell you. My favourite colour is green and I have a cat named Mittens. Once I ate a bug as a dare. It was gross. Really, what do you want to know?
Here’s a few questions for you to answer in your next letter: What’s your favourite colour? Deepest darkest secret? I’m just kidding. Sort of.
Talk to you soon.
Y/N Y/L/N

Dear Y/N,
What a weird ass letter. You’re kind of strange, you know that? I’d ask you to come out to L.A. to visit, but I don’t know you like that. Also, you’re kind of strange.
You said a lot of interesting stuff about yourself, and I can say that I’m intrigued. Sorry about your breakup. I remember the guy, I think I remember him being a douchebag to me at least once. If that makes you feel better. You could send me some of your writing, if that makes you feel better too. And don’t worry about being alone more, you can always write to me whenever you’re feeling down! I like being alone sometimes, it gives me more room to think things out and let creativity grow. So write some amazing stuff. Then send it to me. I’m not joking.
The answers to your questions: my favourite colour is blue and I have no secrets. I’m an open book. Today I wrote a really great song and I’d tell you about it, but it’s classified. Not a secret, though.
This is going to sound weird, and sorry if I’m being too forward, but I do actually kind of miss you. You’re so strange. Tell your cat I said hello.
Luke Hemmings

Hey Luke,
If you don’t stop calling me strange, I will stop writing. Don’t test me.
Thanks for the cool advice about writing, Mr. Rockstar. I have been writing more lately, but it’s classified. My cat says hi.
I’ll pay you like $10 to write a song about me. Make it sound like I’m better and more interesting than I am, please! Thanks.
I’m going to be honest, today was a bad day. I skipped all of my classes because I couldn’t bring myself to get out of bed. It’s not that I felt sick or something, I just felt bad. And it’s like, how much longer do I have to live like this before I can stop feeling like shit because of some guy? You were right, by the way, he was a douchebag. I don’t mean to harp on my problems because you probably have a ton of other stuff you could be doing instead of reading my letters. Maybe I just feel more comfortable telling you about my bad days because I don’t really know you.
I miss you too.
Y/N Y/L/N

Dear Y/N,
Who says I haven’t already written a song about you?
You’re not strange, you’re just unique. I wish I could be there to help you and comfort you on your bad days, but in the meantime, you can always reread my previous letters if you’ve kept them. There’s got to be a compliment or two in there somewhere. Just in case there aren’t: you’re very pretty and a very good writer and I like the shirt you’re wearing today.
Don’t say that you don’t really know me. That hurts my feelings, like all this letter writing means nothing to you. You know my favourite colour, how much closer could we be?
I’m glad that you miss me, because at least that gets your mind off of that douchebag jerkface. Also just because I like seeing the words “I miss you” in your handwriting.
But really, when are you coming to visit? I’ve left my number on the back of this letter. Facetime me sometime. I want to see you.
Luke Hemmings

Luke,
Your letter made me smile a lot. Thanks for that.
Believe it or not, I did keep your letters, but not in a weird way. In a I’m-sentimental-so-leave-me-alone kind of way.
And you’re right, we’re totally close friends now that I know you like the colour blue. Come on, Luke. Tell me a secret. Secrets don’t make friends. There’s no way you don’t have something you’re keeping from me.
Today was better. I saw your face on a magazine again today, but I guess I’m sort of getting used to it by now. Weird that I see your face everywhere but you never see mine. Speaking of which, I don’t think I’ll be Facetiming you anytime soon. I’ve got stories and term papers to write.
Come home already so I can hear that song you wrote about me. I miss you.
Y/N Y/L/N

Y/N,
Just Facetime me already! I miss you!
Glad you’re feeling better. I wish I could see your smile.
Today I wrote a really great song and celebrated by eating an entire pizza. Casual day. Ashton told me I looked fat after I finished it, but no regrets. It’s a good song and if you Facetime me, you can hear it.
I’m telling you, I have no secrets. That fit blonde guy you keep seeing on magazine covers? Yeah, what you see is what you get.
This is going to sound creepy, but here goes. The other night I had a dream that I was at the beach here in L.A., and I walked to the very end of the pier, and you were standing there, like you were waiting for me. I knew it was you even though I couldn’t see your face. But as I was walking closer, you just kept getting farther away. Just out of reach.
Did I mention that I miss you?
Luke

Hi Luke,
Last night I had a dream that I was eating macaroni and cheese. Not much else happened. It was a good dream.
Congrats on your great song, but I’m still not Facetiming you. Do you not like writing letters?
And I still don’t believe that you have no secrets. NOBODY has no secrets. It’s impossible. People can’t be impossible, Luke.
I’ve been really busy writing lately, so I’m sorry about the length of this letter. I miss you too. When are you coming back?
Y/N

Y/N,
I love writing letters, but they just take so much longer. I’m an impatient guy. And I want to see your face.
Tell me about your writing stuff. Is it about me? It better be about me.
Here’s another secret: I don’t really like grapefruit. Everybody else loves them, but I don’t! Wild, right?
I’m starting to think that you don’t like writing to me anymore. Did I do something?
I get back on the 3rd. I can’t wait to see you. Facetime me.
Yours,
Luke

Luke,
Why would I not like writing to you? We’re friends!
Okay, that’s not a secret, that’s a food preference. Try again.
The story I’m writing is kind of complicated and hard to explain. I’d tell you more, but I want it to be a surprise! It’s already longer than anything I’ve ever written and my fingers hurt from so much writing! Being creative is fun.
Facetime is for noobs. Are you a noob, Luke?
Miss you.
Yours,
Y/N

Y/N,
Okay, I’m just going to write it since Facetime is obviously out of the question and I cannot wait until I get home. Here’s a secret: I really really like you.
Yours,
Luke

Dear Luke,
Now that’s my kind of secret. Believe me when I say that I CAN’T wait until you get home.
Yours,
Y/N

3

Here is the text of article:

The Troye who could fly

CAMERON ADAMS
MUSIC WRITER

TROYE Sivan is making pop music smart again.

In an era harking back to the bad old days when young acts are lumbered with generic songs hastily assembled by others purely to meet deadlines for maximum profit, Sivan is a gust of fresh air.

He’s 20, so in the key demo to have dumbed-down pop foisted on him. Yet he’s been given enough time and freedom to make the right full-length first impression.

Sivan has taken the Lorde approach — creating interesting music that demonstrates people under 20 can write lucidly and literately about their youth better than middle aged songwriters doing it for them.

Blue Neighbourhood also uses young writers and producers rather than the usual array of trusted hitmakers for hire.

That doesn’t mean there’s no pop thrills here — on the contrary. Wild has already seduced radio, Fools reminds you electronic music can document a wounded heart just as well as it can a hands waved in the air moment.

The bruised Talk Me Down is the anti-booty call song (”I want to sleep next to you, but that’s all I want to do”) with some glorious melancholy orchestration under the pain. Co-producer Emile Haynie (Kanye, Lana) leaves his digital DNA all over it and it’s glorious and also perfect for the story being told.

There’s touches of Lorde on the mellow detachment of Cool and the blunted beats and lyrical rollcall of Youth. Indeed Sivan gives very good moody ballad, like the woozy Lana Del Rey meets Lorde feel of Too Good (”too good to be good for me, too bad that that’s all I need”) where the songwriter creates the concept of “liquid guilt”.

Refreshingly it’s clearly Sivan’s voice here, fearless and honest in a way most pop stars aren’t. Bite details his first time at a gay bar (”kiss me on the mouth and set me free”), the stunning Heaven (with Betty Who) documents the confusion around his coming out - “trying to save face, and daddy heart break, I’m lying through my teeth, this voice inside has been eating at me.”

This is precisely the kind of song that will help scores of people all over the world, just by being open. Which includes not shying away from pronouns like many before him - For Him is both super-poppy and super-intimate, noting “you don’t have to say I love you to say I love you”.

Australian songwriter Alex Hope has already left her fingerprints all over this record as Sivan’s main co-writer, and on the magnificent melancholy of Blue we finally get to hear her voice. You know those duets with people who’ve been randomly shoved together and you can tell? This isn’t one of those songs.

And on Surburbia you get to hear a 20 year old pining for their lost youth. Bless.

Harry Styles ED Imagine

*IF ANY OF YOU HAVE AN ISSUE WITH THIS I AM ALWAYS HERE, ALWAYS. I KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO HAVE TO GO THROUGH IT ALONE, YOU DO NOT HAVE TOO.*

*THIS ALSO COULD BE TRIGGERING FOR SOME.*

“Hey babe, dinners ready, Alfredo and salad; your favorite!” I don’t know what I’m suppose to tell him now, we haven’t had dinner together in a week because well; I don’t eat dinner. I can’t keep lying so, I’ll eat and throw it up right after. Good plan.

I walked into the kitchen and usually the smell would be refreshing, but I’m too chubby to eat. How come he doesn’t realize that? Everyone else does; even my family. Dinner went on without a hitch, I didn’t eat much; told Harry I had a headache. After dinner Harry had to go finish recording his solo for a new song.

“I’ll be back around eight, ten at the latest! Love you princess!”
“Love you too, have a nice time.”

I watched his car drive away and then I ran to the bathroom, looked myself in the mirror and thought ‘How has he not dumped someone like me?’


I quickly stuck two fingers down my throat and purged everything up. This has been going on for a while. I picked up my razor with the thought that, ‘what’s the point? It isn’t a big deal?’ I brought it slowly to my left wrist and dug.

I may have dug too hard cause I think I’m on a hospital bed with someone crying onto my right arm; No I know someone is crying onto my right arm.

“Please wake up; I’m sorry for not making you feel beautiful every day, I’m sorry for not always being there. We’ll get you better. I promise. I promise.”


^Want part two? Message or get this to 50 notes and I will. YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN GREAT WITH THE NOTES TO MY LAST IMAGINE.^